All sorted, the wording is fine. Changes made.
Posted 26 February 2018 - 07:21 AM
releases enough gravity to rip apart a starship's hull armor in a large area several orders of magnitude larger than the area of the sphere itself
This needs to be reworded so it is clear that this will not always be the case, as it is only ever going to be the person who decides to take a hit's decision on how heavy the damage they take is.
dealing large amounts of thermal as well as kinetic damage to the target. The explosions create damage on an order of magnitude scale, the closer to the sphere the more exponential gravity's power. Effects on ships begins at 2000 meters and increases in order of magnitude as the distance closes.
This also needs to be reworded for the same reason as above. You can simply change each of these around to state that this is a possibility or potential, which would be acceptable.
and inside 100 meters the gravity is intense enough to begin warping hull armor slightly
similar to approaching a quantum singularity.
This needs to be removed, it ventures into superweapon territory. (Firing singularities)
Effective Range: Battlefield
If the effective range is the same as a standard turbolaser, this should be Average. Battlefield means that this can effectively be used, accurately, from anywhere in a given field of engagement to anywhere else in a given area in the same field of engagement, barring extreme distances.
- Kaine Australis likes this