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Nyeon

- - - - - Cyberpunk Planet

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Vihar Hux

Vihar Hux

    "I'm a Ghost."

  • Character
    • Character Bio
  • 148 posts

Nyeon
 
OUT OF CHARACTER INFORMATION

  • Intent: To add a new Cyberpunk-esque planet to the Starwars Universe for new and interesting rp’s and to try and ass a breath of fresh-air to otherwise bland and regular planets.
  • ​Image Credit:
  • Canon: N/A
  • Links: N/A

GENERAL INFORMATION

  • Planet Name: Nyeon
  • Demonym: Nyeonian
  • Region: Mid
  • System Name: Nyon Pass
  • System Features:
  • Celestial Bodies:
    • Nyeon - Inhabited, (Mostly)City World
    • Maqu - Inhabited, Arid World
    • Royu and Uio - Uninhabited Desolate Worlds, Twin Moons of Nyeon
    • Nytui - Uninhabited, Lava World
    • Hoquin Prime - Inhabited, Frozen World

    • Asteroid 404; The Chalice- [X]

    • ​Asteroid 404, known as The Chalice, is a super-max prison created out of a hollowed out asteroid. The Asteroid was first utilized as a large mining station by the super-corporation, Totasku Industries. The asteroid was at one time, home to hundreds of mining drones and dozens upon dozens of mineral outcroppings. The mine ran dry after twenty years of operation, gifting Totasku Industries a twenty billion credits more than they had originally invested into the asteroid-complex mining operation. After it had gone dry, Totasku corporate figures were at a loss at what to do with the hollowed out asteroid. That was, until Kushkia Tutusika came in, the new and young CEO of Totasku Industries. He proposed the idea of an Asteroid prison complex, from which they could siphon work off of the prisoners. In a few years time, the prison was up and running, few years later, it's prisoners were being put...to good use. Totasku Industries would attach a cybernetic GPS node and a security collar to each and every prisoner, with or without their consent. This allows Totasku Industries to known the location of each and every prisoner every hour of every day. The security collar is bolted in surgically, making removal impossible without a professional or harm to one's self, the collar also has a built in electrocution switch to electrocute and temporarily knockout any prisoners who either try to escape or remove their collars. Asteroid 404 is home to over five-million prisoners. Totasku Industries is a company that can produce but is not limited to producing new medical procedures and drugs. The prisoners who make their home the Chalice, are victim to these new drugs and experimental medical procedures. Totasku Industries experiment on these prisoners, testing out new, and often-times, harmful drugs along with new breakthroughs in surgical procedures and medical procedures.

  • Maqu - [X]
    • Surface of Maqu - [X] - [X]
      • Maqu is one of the various unique planets harbored within the Nyon system. The planet it's self is quite hospitable. Sections of the planet are covered in long stretches of sulfur fields, spread about with extremely acidic and dangerous sulfuric ponds. Large sandstorms roll across the surface of the planet, along with monstrous and torturous clouds of acidic rain. Anything that isn't part of a sulfuric field or massive sulfuric ocean, is just an empty desert, filled with large rock outcroppings. The surface of Maqu is dotted in various once-inhabited structures. These structures can range from an age-old castle to a military outpost or mining outpost with now outdated technology from Nyeon.
      • Maqu's landscape alone is quite inhospitable and dangerous. Though, that's just the least of people's worries when they come to Maqu. The Maqunease (X) people haunt the land by day and by night. They are a nomadic and incredibly aggressive race of people, rumor has it that they can hide themselves among the sand and the sulfuric ponds to ambush any who would dare intrude on their land. Though, this claim hasn't been investigated much, though their are plenty of sightings and first-hand witnesses telling of these things. Not much is known about these people. What is known however, is their technology is primitive, or at least somewhat. They use home-made technology and re-purposed technology, the highest of their technological feats being large sail barges they use to quickly move across the sand. Though, they are not the only threat on Maqu. Large sandworms swim under the creeping, desolate sands and sulfuric fields of Maqu. These are massive, lumbering beasts that prowl under the sand, which can gobble up over two dozen humans in one gulp quite easily. Not much is known about them, save for their thick hide, hungry appetites, massive sites, and their terrifying presence in sandstorms. And that's not even including the sand-sharks. The sand sharks feed on the sand-striders, voracious carnivores which can quickly run across the land at high-speeds of fifty-miles an hour. Even with their voracious nature and aggresivness, some Magunease have been able to tame a few sand-striders, using them as efficient mounts.
      • Numerous corporations from Nyeon, both large and small in size and financial situation, have sent out expeditions to Maqu due to source's of Coaxium on Maqu. The number that have been successful, however, is marginal. Within the last one-hundred years, over five-hundred expeditions have been sent to Maqu to find the Coaxium sources and to try and cull the native population. Out of those five-hundred expeditions, only a mere ten have been able to survive and sustain themselves on Maqu. Mimbasa Incorporated, is the only corporation to have succesfully established a base of operations of Maqu within the last one-hundred and fifty years. Totasku Industries was able to do this before Mimbasa, though their base of operations of Maqu was destroyed after an explosion of coaxium destroyed their facility. Any survivors were lost in the subsequent sandstorm, presumed to have been eaten by a swarm of sand-sharks.
      • Mimbasa Incorporated established the 'city,' if you could call it that, of Rust-Devil. Rust-Devil is very much, a military stronghold and exporting hub used by Mimbasa. About 50% of Mimbasa's Incorporated private army is stationed on Maqu, meaning 5,000 soldiers are stationed to safeguard Rust-Devil and any Coaxium mining stations. That's not including the the robots who operate any military aircraft to try and safeguard the perimeter of any Mimbasa Incorporated facilities on Maqu. One could say the mines on Maqu were quite safe, though if anyone told you that, don't listen to them, they're an idiot. The sandworms are not the only things that lurk under the sand. Under the sands, their are also vicious and rather large quadruped creatures that can walk bipedal. These creatures are simply called, Daimonas. On their two back legs, they can stand at a whopping nine-feet, or taller. These creatures, although blind, have well-attuned senses. The Daimonas can sense vibrations through the sand, and along the ground as they walk, in a sense, knowing if someone is walking in front of them just by the mere vibrations their feet give off. These creatures are slightly slow, though they're deadly nonetheless. On all floors, they can reach twenty-miles an hour, with thick hide to make up for it along with numerous smaller arms to grab prey and gnaw on them with their hooked and serrated teeth.
  • ​​​​Asteroid 47; Nitro Dome - [X]

    • Asteroid 47, or the Nitro Dome, is a large race track that goes across a massive asteroid. The asteroid itself is held in place above Maqu through the use of large gravity well generators, helping the asteroid to remain in upper orbit of the Nitro Dome without burning up. To help with this, the asteroid also has metal plates grafted onto it's rocky hull to help act as a thermal shield along with a deflector shield to keep fresh air inside. The race track is a 5.2 oval with 28 degrees of banking, making for a large race track that can hold numerous contestants. Typically races will have up to fifty racers in them, though that number can rise to fifty-six contestants.
    • The Nitro Dome can hold over 500,000 thousand occupants and admission is quite high, though the spectacle is worth it. Fifty racers, all vying for first across a massive race-track. Then their's the catch, obstacles can instantly be put up or operated through mechanized means to add more danger and thrill to each and every race. The VIP's are the ones who bid money on the obstacles, the obstacle that gets the most money is the one put up. Though, that's not to say all races will have obstacles. For yearly events, such as the Nyitro Tournament, no obstacles are used to deter or mess up drivers and their vehicles from a fair chance at winning. Betting takes place pre-match, where both VIP's and regular occupants can bet on who they think will win.
    • Ninety-two ago, Mimbasa Incorporated was looking for new avenues of revenue to boost financial growth. Dozens of ideas were thrown about and debated about amongst corporate officials and a few prominent shareholders. Eventually, former CEO, Killian Arc, decided to take a gamble by investing fifteen billion credits into creating a large race-track on a large asteroid which was close to Maqu. It took twelve years of construction and financial investment and delays, though eventually the whole process came through. Killian Arc, however, never got to see this risk of his work out, as he was assassinated by a rival corporation, Totasku Industries. Though, construction continued, and today the Nitro Dome remains a large financial contributor to Mimbasa's continued financial success. The money they gained helped contribute to further ventures and expeditions for financial gain in their system, it also helped in large part, funding the financial indevore to send an expedition to Maqu.
  • Asteroid 77; The Golden City  - [X]
    • Asteroid 77, or The Golden City, is a massive asteroid colony consisting of a billion people. The Golden City uses two rather large asteroids, two medium-large sized asteroids, and about five or six medium to small sized asteroids. All of these asteroids are conjoined together through the use of titanium reinforced, quadanium beams which are bolted into the asteroids. Over a dozen beams connect all of the asteroids together with one another, keeping them locked in place. To help the asteroids remain in place, two gravity well generators were put in place to act as an artificial gravity system to help keep them together and to try and mimic a planet's gravity. A deflector shield is used to help keep in an oxygen reach, type I 'atmosphere' to make sure all inhabitants can breath the air cleanly and without much trouble. However, each inhabitant is required to have an emergency breathing mask on them at all times encase of an accident.
    • The first idea for this was conceived by Vanguard Industries as they began to buy up market shares. Though, they were soon stopped in their 'good intentioned' tracks by Nyon Solutions. Nyon Solutions bought half of Vanguard Industries in a stunning display, taking over Vanguard Industries once well-thought out idea. From this, Nyon Solutions set up a large city-like asteroid colony amongst numerous asteroids that were brought together, to one another. Nyon Solutions quickly advertised Asteroid 77 as a vibrant and exciting colony for many to see, and thus, many people flocked to it, for all of the 'opportunity' that it represented. Though, once they got there, their was in short, basically no way back. Once people reached the Golden City, they were signed into a contract where they would pay an 75% tax to Nyon Solutions in exchange for free housing and food. Various small subsidiaries of smaller companies flocked here, only to be tricked to, in essence, give most of their earnings to Nyon Solutions​
  • Coordinates: 27-N (Near First Order Space)
  • Major Imports:
    • ​Food Products
    • Hydrogen
    • Nitrogen
    • Oxygen
  • Major Exports:
    • Advanced Cybernetics (Limited Amounts & Very Expensive)
    • Advanced Robotics (Limited Amounts & Very Expensive)
    • Various Jewels, Gems, and Crystals (Sapphires, Ruby's, Emeralds, Diamonds, etc)
    • Precious Metals (Gold, Silver, etc)
    • Ionite
    • Durasteel
    • Quadanium
    • Coaxium
  • GEOGRAPHIC INFORMATION
    • Gravity: Standard
    • Climate: Temperate, Frozen Tundra, Acid Rain
    • Primary Terrain: Frozen Tundra, Mountains, Pine Forests, Urban, Tropical Oasis (Government Owned Area)
    • Atmosphere: 
      • Nyeon experiences a polluted, although breathable Type I atmosphere. Large industrial centers and manufacturing planets pump many hazardous vapors and gases into the atmosphere each and every day. To counteract this, the Super-corporation, Vanguard Industries, instated massive air purifying systems. These systems would take in polluted air, which was filled with various harmful and toxic elements, and then transform it into clean air through recycling it. However, getting rid of the noxious fumes and vapors in the air isn't quite as simple as that. To counteract this issue, Vanguard Industries opted to transport many of the noxious fumes to the lower, underground levels of the city, most notably level's one-hundred to ninety. These fumes are quite toxic to most species, and to help keep these fumes down below, Vanguard Industries implemented large, double airlocks to prevent most of the fumes from leaving the lowest levels.
    • ​Major Corporations:
      • ​Super-Corporation: Totasku Industries; owned by Kushkia Tutusika - financially, medium
      • Super-Corporation: Mimbasa Incorporated; owned by Vorac Fett - financially, high
      • Super-Corporation: Vanguard Industries; owned by Sasan - financially, low-medium
      • Super-Corporation; Nyon Solutions, owned by Conner Richards - financially, high
      • Super-Corporation; ValTech Solutions, owned by Audrey Ricker - financially, medium-high
    • Major Criminal Corporations:
      • Cartel; Blue-Cross Cartel; illegal weapons and drug trafficking, Valkyrie Hudan is the leader
      • Cartel; Saligan Cross Cartel; illegal weapons, drug, and organ trafficking, Kau-oil is the leader
      • Major Revolutionary; Winter Revolutionaries; terrorist bombings and attacks, political assassinations, raids on government owned property, Hul'ko, Tracko Lu, Ryley Audren, and Hector Vondoon are the revolutionary leaders
      • Revolutionary; Badger Insurrection; terrorist bombings and attacks, Hoozan Kaling is the revolutionary leader
    • Major Locations: 
      • Geno Archive - [X]

          • The Geno Archive is a massive genetic archive of most, if not all documented citizens of Nyeon. The Geno Archive is located in a thin although, geographically large stretch of land on the equator. All of the tropical land here, and anywhere on the planet, is government property. Entering onto this land is strictly prohibited, and the penalty is prison for an undisclosed amount of time. When a citizen is born, in a government owned hospital, a blood sample is taken of them when first born. This blood sample houses their DNA, which is then stored alphabetically in a massive Genetic Storage at the Geno Archive facility. The reason for these being stored here is simple, or at least it's simple on the surface level, the thinnest level. The over-reaching government of Nyeon uses this facility to keep a record of each and every citizen on Nyeon, it helps to track their location and can help in tracking down criminals. Or at least, documented criminals that is. That is why, whenever an enforcer pulls a citizen over or arrests a citizen for criminal or fraudulent activity, they take a routine blood test. The DNA sample is then electronically tested amongst a database of all documented people's, if they are found to not be documented, they will be arrested for an undisclosed amount of time. The government of Nyeon does this to make sure nobody leave Nyeon without them knowing, and so that they can keep informative and well-developed tabs on each and every citizen encase any one of them needs to be investigated.
          • Though, that's just the surface reason. The real reason, isn't quite sinister, or at least doesn't appear to be. Many people on Nyeon, if not most, engage in the use of birth control medicine, pills, and surgical procedures. This has steamed into a low birth rate for the planet Nyeon, and, before the government started this classified process, even led to a rather steep decline in population number. It got so bad eventually, that the government began to institute a new practice. Genetic tampering of the DNA genome, and thus began the cloning of modified DNA genomes. These clones have never, and will never be exact copies of their original DNA strand. Doing so, could lead to numerous problems, as was cited in the first few clones the government of Nyeon created. These clones were created for the sole purpose of keeping the population number at a steady and nearly consistent pace. Which, of course, it did. This process helped the population of Nyeon bounce back greatly, and even made it a bit higher than it has been previously. Whenever a clone is created, a microscopic, self-sufficient nanite(nano bot) is implemented into the clones body. This nano bot acts as a tracker to help keep track of all clones, and also offers consistent and up to date life signs on a daily basis. As for offspring of the clone, well, that's when the nanite's efficiency is used up, as it cannot be passed down to a clone's possible offspring.
          • The government however, learned that their cloning technology could be used for a...far better use. The government sent cloning experts and genetic engineers to work, with as many enforcers as they would need. They would, in a sense, abduct certain individuals from the population. The enforcers would go in, and capture only very specific people. These people would be, the most handsome, the strongest, the ones with the best genes. Yes, they did have the genomes of these people. Though, they didn't want any problems to happen encase they lost the genomes of these people, so they kidnapped them. These scientists and experts in their field, experimented on these kidnapped and abducted people, trying to create the most perfect human specimen, without cybernetics that is. Then, that's when things would get...bloody. These experts would...well, pit these specimens against one another. Though, this only happened with a very select, and very small, and very hush-hush control group. Most of the other experts and scientist just ran experiments. The government set in this motion of events and processes to...create, what they would say, is "the most perfect blend of gene editing and cybernetic implementation." They would then clone these more 'perfected' individuals, and use them as enforcers. Yes, they could've used machines. Though, the robotics technology that the government had, wasn't as perfected or human-like as some others on the planet. Sure, corporations could outpace them somewhat on a technology basis, though on a pure financial basis and just pure resources basis, the government would always win. The government also believed, that an actual human, although a 'false' one, would be better in the long run. An actual human would be more convincing and appealing to people, than some cold, dead machine ever would be. Eventually, this process was also used in the soldiers the government employed as well. {Cloning Tube} {Cloning Tube 2}
          • This process is also used for NEO operatives and for the Secret Police. Normal, non-clone individuals were dangerous for use in NEO. They could very easily leak classified information, not followed through on orders, or even disobey very specified and oftentimes immoral orders given by superiors all in the name of, 'It's Wrong.' Clones on the other hand, followed orders unwavering. From birth they were taught one simple thing, 'Good soldiers, follow orders.' With that mentality in mind, NEO operatives would follow through on all orders, no matter the moral doubts that they would've had, had they been human. To help reinforce this, an organic chip was installed each NEO operatives brain right out of the cloning pod. This organic chip could override all free will of a clone and make them mindless machines that were hellbent on their orders alone. Such a maneuver was demonstrated in Winter Revolution.
      • The Works - [X]

          • The Works is a large stretch of land surrounding the cities of Nykio and Saligan. This area, is where the majority of factories, refining stations, manufacturing plants, power plants, and mines are located on Nyeon. Ninety percent of the planet's atmospheric pollution and environmental pollution comes from this area alone. The Works isn't strictly government owned, however. Even though it is located on the outskirts of major cities, cities which are operated and controlled by the government, The Works are more than government owned. The government does own a few pieces of land amongst The Works, however, the rest of the area is divided up among the various super-corporations on Nyeon. Though, all of this is government land, so it isn't cheap. The super-corporations had to pay a steep fee for use of this area, and that was just the initial cost. Corporations would have to give forty-five percent of the goods they produced in this area, and would have to pay a five percent tax to the government for operating on government owned, and sanctioned land.
          • These areas are the most heavily polluted sections of the planet. The skies ware blacked with chemical soot from churning factories which never stop for a single, insignificant second. The factories work day and night, working off of automation and drug-induced, low-salary workers. Automation and machines do most of the work in The Works, though their are still the people. At first, all production was controlled through automation and mindless, cold machines. That was before the Thirty-Five Percent Act, which was enacted by President Elise Reyd. This act become a new government regulation for all companies henceforth after it's passing, encouraging and requiring all factories and work-places to have at least, thirty-five percent of their workforce being human. Now, this doesn't apply to meaning that a highly automated company has to have thirty-five percent of non-machines. No, The Thirty-Five Percent Act requires that each building owned by a company or organization, has a least thirty-five percent of the workforce within the building, being an actual, breathing person rather than some soulless machine.
          • The Works also acts as a ghetto, underneath all of the 'high and mighty' factories and production facilities. While all the rich people live in the city, along with all of if not most of the middle class citizens. Leaving most of the poor to live in The Works. Most of the poor live in this area, not all of them, some of the others fled to the cities and inner cities, though either way, they're struggling to live their life. The poor are, in a sense, trapped in these areas with no way out of The Works or Ghettos. Constant nightly patrols go on in this area, along with occasional raids by N.E.O operatives, or Nyeon Executional Oversight Operatives.
          • N.E.O is a covert and classified section of the government of Nyeon. This classified section of the government is under control by Director Kaliban Keys, who is both cybernetically and genetically enhanced on behalf of the Government. N.E.O is both a covert intelligence organization, along with an organization that employs the use of Secret Police. These 'Secret Police' monitor the people of Nyeon constantly, or at least do their best to do so. Their are always those few people who some how are able to circumvent the SP, though they always get caught in the end. The SP can hide in plain sight with no effort at all, as they pretend to be day-to-day citizens on a daily basis. This allows them to infiltrate politically hostile organizations or resistance cells, and bring them down from the inside. The Secret Police helped in stopping the Winter Revolution, the Clockwork Propagation, and the Key-day Revolt. Though, they failed in the Funga-gulag Outbreak, proving ineffective and obsolete in this scenario.
          • The N.E.O sends out occasional raid in The Works, to cut the growth of revolutionaries before they can start something...dangerous. The Works is a key place for the growth of revolutions, its where the Winter Revolution first began, where the Key-day Revolt first began, and where the Shroud Insurrection began. Throughout the whole time The Works had been around, revolts and minor insurrections have always happend in this area. The government has always refused to acknowledge the true reason, along with the corporations, for why these always happened. Thus began the raids, patrols, and curfews that were set about in The Works. Raids in this area can come suddenly and without warning. That, and gang wars can happen without warning in this area as well. This place is incredibly poor, and thus, many turned to crime in this area. This resulted in a spike in crime in this area, increasing law enforcement presence, increased SP presence, along with just more issues for the government and corporations in the area. Occasionally, fights would break out between law enforcement and gangs, resulting in very frequent raids from SP personnel. After more and more incidents broke out, the SP would go...to more extreme measures, some of which involved torture, others of which involved flamethrowers, and others of which involved executing of suspected individuals.
          • Some days, The Works is peaceful, almost tranquil, other days, it's hostile, and an open warzone.
      • Testing Facility 012/ Secondary N.E.O Headquarters - [X]

          • Testing Facility 012 is a secret government facility that is located in the tropical stretch of land on the equator of Nyeon. The land being strictly government owned, means that this is a government sanctioned, and government personnel only facility. There is no record on Testing Facility 012 in the government archive, it's not even on official, licensed data records for building locations or any facility of upmost importance. Testing Facility 012 is both a facility which is used for...testing of certain diabolical arts along with the Infamous headquarters of N.E.O. No record of this facility even exists on any satellite records or flight recording records due to the tropical, government owned area being a no-fly zone. If any commercial or military ship flies over this area, they will first be warned when they are within a 1,500 meters of this place. If the flight ignores these warnings, it will be shot down, no exceptions.
          • Testing Facility 012 is very much, a facility that is shrouded in utmost secret and is never talked about. Horrendous experiments happen within the thick quadanium-plasteel walls of this facility. The government uses this building for...genetic experimentation and certain other...ungodly acts. One of these ungodly acts is where a healthy prisoner is taken from one of the many asteroid prisons. N.E.O sends out the SP to quickly and quietly extract these healthy prisoners with no witnesses at all, not even prison personnel are alerted as they could prove a liability if they get too scared...the government doesn't want anyone spreading rumors around, no matter how far-fetched and possibly true they may sound to be. Once the prisoner is extracted to Testing Facility 012, they are medically scanned to determine the healthiness of their organs. If the organs are damaged, the prisoner is...dispatched of, quickly and without commotion. However, if a prisoner had healthy organs without any faults, the scientists and surgeons get to work. They clone the prisoner before extracting their organs, and so on and so forth. In a sense, this was organ farming. And this was just one of the dark and twisted things the Government did without any prying eyes from the public.
          • Testing Facility 012 is also the HQ of N.E.O, or at least one of them. There is a total of two Headquarters for N.E.O. one of which is this one.NEO forces operate from this location, monitoring countless communications along with the holonet. The planet was connected to to the main holonet, though NEO holonet technicians censored certain areas of the holonet to not make an unhappy populace. After all, they didn't want a repeat of the Winter Revolution any time soon, that was certain. From Facility 012, NEO operatives would also send out raids from this location and they wound send back in any political prisoners, rebel insurgents, and subjects needed for testing and people suspected of terrorist doings. What happened to these people, was behind closed doors however. NEO conducts hundreds of operations a day from this location.

POPULATION

  • Native Species: Native Fauna & Flora, though no Native Sentient Life
  • Immigrated Species: Human & Some Alien Species
  • Population: Heavily populated,hundreds of billions
  • Demographics: 
    • Humans & Human Cyborgs - 80%
    • Alien Races - 12%
    • Robots/Androids - 8%
  • Primary Languages: Galactic Standard Basic
  • Culture: 
    • Daily life on Nyeon is very similar to that of everyone else in the galaxy. Though, culture primarily depends on area. People are allowed into the planet through the shield gate and, in most cases, they decide to settle down and thus, add to the widely inclusive and very diverse culture of Nyeon. Other than that, Nyeon daily life typically includes going to work, working, and then going home. Although, their is the need to buy 'happy' drugs as life on Nyeon can get pretty unpleasant at times, what with the rampant corporate greed and government greed, which isn't as bad as it once used to be. These 'happy' drugs alter people's moods and dopamine outputs from their brains, making them feel euphoria and joy whereas they might be struggling through depression or any number of emotional distress.

GOVERNMENT & ECONOMY

  • Government: Oligarchy
  • Government Personnel(In Order of Importance)​​
  • Affiliation: Unaligned; Isolationist
  • Wealth: Very High
  • Stability: Low-medium
  • Freedom & Oppression: 
    • ​Nyeon is in a sense, ruled over by a 'dictator.' Though, the leader of the people is one elected by the people, for the people...for life. Senators are 'elected' among the people and sent to a Senate buildings where various laws, ordinances, and constitutional issues are decided upon. Some of these senator's, are however, representatives of super corporations. Both N.E.O. and N.E.M.O 'send' people from their organizations to play politics and to decide upon and vote on laws. These 'senators' from both N.E.O. and N.E.M.O are however passed off as senators who were elected from the people. Both of these organizations do this to not draw any suspicion from the government or the people, and nobody has been any the wiser as to who these senators truly are. Both N.E.O. and N.E.M.O, although government sanctioned and funded organizations, are separate from the government, they act outside of government jurisdiction and control. This thus enables them to influence governmental policies for their own benefits.
    • Both NEO and NEMO act as sources of oppression, along with various other organizations. However, NEO and NEMO are the ones which act most outside of the law and the organizations which are most capable and willing to invade the people's privacy for "The Greater Good," as said by Osiris Keys, the initial usurper of the former government during the Winter Revolution who was in charge of the coup. These two organizations watch people's movements on a daily basis, deploying thousands of cameras and automated surveillance drones, watching people constantly to make sure they're no up to any misdeeds or criminal conduct. NEO also crackdown on crime, as is evidenced by the constant raids in The Works along with political assassinations. This 'encourages' all citizens to act uniformly and in line with the government's policies.

MILITARY & TECHNOLOGY 

  • Military: 
    • NEO is, by most standards, the 'actual' military force. NEO forces are numerous enough to keep a whole planet in line, and then some. NEO forces are the most highly skilled soldiers on the plant, engaging in brutal training regimes when they reach the right age, and all of them, are clones. They were so highly skilled that during the Winter Revolution, they had initiated a coup of the government. This government was, keyword, was more of a corporate-control and very corrupted democratic-based electoral system. In it's place, NEO and NEMO established a electoral, military-centric dictatorship...from which the military command of the time would always be guaranteed a place in the government, through a new constitutional clause which was drafted by NEO forces.
    • The navy has a notable size equating in 100 kilometers. Any other information regarding the Navy is unknown. Though, it is suspected it's strength is equal to that of any standard galactic-based 100 kilometer sized fleet. A planetary shield surrounds the planet of Nyeon, keeping all people's within the planet through access of a shield gate.
    • The actual 'military' of Nyeon, if you could call it that, is headed by Joseph Jocely. The military force of Nyeon is made up entirely of clones, so no moral issues come up with the time comes for "exact precision in all duties, no matter how morally corrupt they may seem in the moment of authorization and duty," as said by Director Kaliban Keys. Their are over fifteen million clone soldiers on Nyeon. However, of these fifteen million soldiers, most are not used for military purposes until time demands they be used. A large majority of the military force is stationed throughout military bases in the major cities of Nyeon along with being tasked to guard any and all government facilities, specifically those in the tropical equator, or Troctor Section.Military forces are only deployed if their is an issue of upmost importance such as the defense of the government from major and hostile political threat, a threat that could come from either the inside or outside.
    • The Government of Nyeon is an entirely separate story, they have, what most would deem, a clone army. They use vast facilities for cloning purposes and their armies are made up of theoretically perfect soldiers which have been created through manipulation of the human genome for the best possible traits possible. Nyeon has multiple sects of armies, each one widely different than the next. The Enforcers are a large organization of, what most would deem police officers, though with military-grade equipment. The Enforcers are the only sect of the military that are not compromised entirely of clones. Head of Security, Norman Oxen, is in charge of the Enforcers sect of the military and he handles all internal security affairs along with all the issues and affairs that come with being in charge of all law enforcement on Nyeon. The Enforcers alone number in the millions, if not billion, though exact numbers are hard to pinpoint.
    • Nyeon's military force is a complicated matter to say the least. It also depends upon what one defines as a planet's 'Military Force.' Each super-corporation on Nyeon has a private army of some sort, whether it be one made up of organics, outside mercenaries, or cold machines which were designed solely for war. The largest super-corporations, Totasku Industries and Mimbasa Incorporated have the largest private armies, but even then they're not that large, ranging in at ten thousand total for each. However, they are starting to incorporate outside mercenary forces and legions comprised of machines of war, so things could change.
  • Technology: 
    • ​Technology on Nyeon is more advanced than the galactic standard of the galaxy. Specifically, Nyeon has far more advanced cybernetics, robotics and drugs than the rest of the galaxy, specifically due to the millions of scientist, both native and abducted, who work hour upon hour in labs and doing research to better the life of those living on Nyeon.

HISTORICAL INFORMATION

  • Discovery
    • The planet of Nyeon, was discovered by accident. All it had been was a hyperlane accident, a few coordinates too high, a few coordinates too far to the left was all it took. Where colonists had been trying to colonize a world in one of the nearby systems, instead they found themselves somewhere that they hadn't expected. An unmarked system of sorts, their was no record of it on any starmaps, or if their had been, it had been erased for unknown reasons.Whatever the reasons for it being unmarked, the colonists were now trapped here. They had only enough coaxium to make the trip to one system, they hadn't been expecting any sort of detour. Though, they found themselves in an unknown place, one that they hadn't ever seen before. Sure, the colonists could've called for help with an emergency distress signal. However, that distress signal wouldn't be easily traced, their were no coordinates for the planet of Nyeon, and it's system of Nyon Pass. The only good thing that came out of this, was peace and quiet. The colonists didn't have to be worried with the corporation that had first sent them out to colonize a brave new world. Some colonists were of course, homesick and wanted to go home...though they knew doing so would prove disastrous for both themselves and their families. After all, disappearing with a few million credits worth of ships and then showing up years later with one ship in tow, wouldn't please anyone.

  • Unity
    • Over centuries the original colonists, which had numbered in the thousands..their size was now exponentially increased. War fighting and loss tore them apart from each other, it turned brother against brother, sister against sister, and wife against husband. They had then thus, become divided among themselves, forming up nations that held no mighty banner aloft their people's shoulders, nations that had no purpose, no dream. This was how it was, and had been, for countless centuries since the original colonists first landed. Sure, technology progressed at quite a steady rate, if not a faster rate than the rest of the galaxy...though not much happened with the new technology. Tall cities of metal and steel were built on evergreen plains that had trees bestowed upon them. These cities would last for maybe a century or two, or a few decades...and then be burned, or crumble. However, two cities remained among all of those that were destroyed. The first two cities of the colonists, after they had divided themselves into their respective affiliated groups. One, was Saligan...which became the City of Lights, because of all of the stars, millions of them, which could be seen from where Saligan had been built. The other, was Nykio which had become the Azure Jewel, because of the azure blue ocean that was up against it's back. These cities were the only two which hadn't been destroyed. They had become victims of war, been partly destroyed and ruined...though they were rebuilt after all of the strife and turmoil.
    • Eventually, the once voracious and disobedient nature of the descendants of the colonists was culled. A new nation was formed, one which had been built on the backs of freedom and liberty and of the right of every being to live according to their works and good will. It was a global nation, one that banded together and explored the stars once more, meeting new systems with new people in them. This nation, was built on the hands of countless people, people who gladly lifted up the burden of this nation, and made something....something new, something that was pure in a world once consumed full of turmoil and death and decay and war and disease. With this new nation, technological development increased exponentially, as did population. Millions of scientists labored. Though, this was when the true nature of this new nation began to shine through. Kidnappings and abductions, they would abduct profound and highly regarded scientists from nearby systems and from across the galaxy, stealing them away for their own nefarious purposes to increase their own selves.

  • Gulag Plague
    • The Gulag Plague came about quickly and without warning, quickly killing off a large portion of the heavily populated planet. The plague came swiftly and without mercy, greatly hindering and decimating the military force of Nyeon. Government personnel panicked, unsure of what to do in such a mass crisis where so many died in such a short span of time, they hadn't the idea of what to do to stop the needless death and spread of disease. This was thus when N.E.M.O was created. Yes, N.E.O. was around, though during this time, they were far weaker than they would be today. They didn't hold as much control as they do now, nor did they have as much financial support and military support as they do now in the present day. N.E.M.O took over all military control during this period in Nyeon history, they were given full jurisdiction by the government to use any and all means necessary to eradicate this 'Gulag Plague' from Nyeon and to purge any infected individuals by what ever means were most effective.
    • Thus, N.E.M.O did as they were instructed...and they did the job in the 'best' fashion possible. Burning. They had been given a very substantial amount of funds, larger than they had ever received before. They had been given weapons, military-grade ones with no warnings or limits. The only limit they were given? "Don't kill any innocents," that was the only rule they had been given. And they followed through with it...that is if one would consider infected civilians as not being innocent. If so, then they followed through with their orders perfectly. After all, the only conditions and actual 'orders' they had been given, were simple. "Listen, the job's simple. Keep it clean without any needless casualties, don't kill any innocents. I don't want to be impeached after all, we can't accept another incident like what happened in the Vorbatz Incident. Your job is simple, eradicate this 'Gulag Plague, or whatever the outsiders call it. Burn any dead bodies, round up the infected and bring them to field hospitals...under no circumstance are you to keep an infected individual with an uninfected individual. We mustn't let this infestation spread and destroy all that our ancestors have built, Reyes. I know you will do what is necessary," those were the exact words and orders from Democratically Elected President Jarvis Goodwil. N.E.M.O set to work, operating hazmat suits and gas masks and military grade equipment. They used small, backpack drones to scan each individual, if one was infected, the drone would give off an alarming beep. From that, N.E.M.O's work began. They would round up any infected individuals that tested positive for the Gulag Plague and deal with them, sending them to a secure underground area and beginning The Cleansing process. They did this day after day, no exceptions whatsoever, seven days a week, twenty-four seven.

 

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HD=[x]/[X]'The Cleansing' or 'The Burning' as it was called by N.E.M.O operatives. Before this time, N.E.M.O had barely even been heard of by the public. However, after the Gulag Plague and subsequent Funga-Gulag Outbreak, it was hard to keep information secret about the militarized, sometimes morally-broken organization. Public opinion wavered quickly once N.E.M.O began their 'cleansing' practices...eventually the government officially cut funding to N.E.M.O and shut it down...at least until the Winter Revolution

 

  • During this time period, seasonal conditions went from bad to terrible what with over-pollution and everything. Winters would drag on for months, with constant snowfall. To add to it, anarchy would break out in the streets. Instead of the normal enforcers who would go out and deal with these things, N.E.M.O operatives would go out an deal with these things. These operatives became known as, 'Cleansers' or 'Burners,' along with various other slang-based names and insult-strewn names. These 'Cleaners' become more, how do you say, vile over time with all the power that they had.What made it worse, was that these were actual people, not clones. Although, these people were cybernetically enhanced, but they were people, or at least had been before they committed these heinous acts.
  • Riots broke out in the streets, the military proved ineffective while N.E.M.O operatives grew mad with the power of fire and money, though they still did hold true to their goal given to them by President Jarvis Goodwil. Though, the way they went about achieving said goal, was more...heinous, more...morally corrupt and unstable. Clashes would occasionally happen between the Cleansers and rioters, and from this, rioters would get weapons and use said weapons to try and stop the Cleaners. Though, the situation would only deteriorate from there, especially once Marshall Juarez Vivian was assassinated in a public rally. Juarez Vivian was...the brother of Reyes Vivian, the Director of N.E.M.O. Reyes ordered a crackdown on crime, with no remorse. It was too late for President Goodwil to stop it. Though, luckily he had told some scientists two years earlier to begin working on a cure once the Gulag Plague first showed it's self on Nyeon.

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[X] "I want every last one of those rioters who were there at my brother's rally rounded up," Reyes spoke with the calm demeanor of a old man who knew his time was up, unlike him. "After that," captain Versailles questioned. "Execute them, we cannot tolerate such utter lawlessness on Nyeon, oh and captain? Once you get the man who killed my brother, bring him to me." After the assassination of Marshall Juarez Vivian, the crackdown of crime and rioters reached the extreme. With Reyes Vivian now taking full charge of N.E.M.O after being lax in it's direction during the Gulag Plague incident, the population had reached a breaking point. The rioters who had been present at Marshall Juarez Vivian had been rounded up and...[end of data-segment]

 

  • Funga-gulag Outbreak
    • Months prior to the outbreak of the gulag plague on Nyeon internationally, their were reports of an unknown disease being discovered in a few select people, the first five who died a week after being diagnosed. President Goodwil has issued a command to a select few N.E.O. operatives to get a citizen that harbored the gulag plague and to bring it back to the testing facilities. Thus, they did as they were asked, with extreme prejudice. Three N.E.O. operatives had been sent, and all returned on a quarantine airship...all of them had been infected. Efforts were made to try and find a cure for the disease. For two long, and grueling years the scientists studied this 'Gulag Plague' and began to try and combat it with a cure. They used fungal spores and bacteria of a now extinct flora, they used these fungal spores in conjunction with various antibodies and high-end medicines to eventually make a cure. The first few tests proved the two years were worth it, despite how badly conditions had deteriorated in two years. Within a week, the gulag plague appeared to have been wiped from a person's whole entire system. However, their wasn't a long-term cure. In fact, this 'cure' the scientist made, only proved more dangerous and fatal than anyone could've ever predicted. A good-will and good intention effort instead, proved disastrous and a waste of two years. This became known as the 'Funga-Gulag' outbreak, one of which mutated people who received it due to the parasitic and mind-controlling like fungus used in the curing process. These people would obtain fungal like features in response and would try to spread there disease through cannibalism, in public no doubt. They eventually become more beast than man as fungal prosthesis grew on them, enveloping their face and body...making it look other-worldly and alien. They eventually, didn't even resemble being of any normal human or alien race, all that remained of their past selves was their bipedal form with two arms, everything else had been warped to the extreme and the ugly by this new virus.
    •  

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[x]- "What the hell happened," lead scientist Dorban Cantuo questioned with a vicious glaze in his eyes like he were on the verge of insanity. "I..I don't know, one minute the test subject was fine, the next he was cannibalizing the uncured test subject," scientist Rodrick responded hauntingly as the images played themselves repeatably in a loop, like a veil over his sleep-deprived eyes. "Damn, and the public, what of them. We issued the cure out a week ago, any other reports like the one you saw," Dorban questioned frantically, anxiety taking hold of his mind, turning him hot and clammy to the touch. "Incidents within the last week...they, their's been over twelve dozen incidents within the last week." The holo-comn rung hauntingly during that moment of franticness and anxiety. Dorban knew it was for him, he picked up the comn cautiously with sweat dripping down his measly pale chin, and he answered. "Cantou, this is President Goodwil...just what the hell did you karking do?"  

 

  • The disease spread to thousands within days, and then millions in a few weeks time. And then a billion. This, whatever this was that those scientists had cooked up in their lab, was not going to stop. It took a few weeks for the government to actually do something about this issue. Their forces scrambled as all government personnel were transported to a large bunker in the Troctor Sector. The government was at a loss at what to do, they hadn't been expecting anything of this sort to ever have happened, and now that it did happen, they still didn't believe it. Some of them refused to believe it, though all they were doing was denying the truth and allowing countless people to be infected by the second and die. The people were still 'alive' though they had been changed and warped by this Funga-gulag cure turned infection, though their bodies were no longer their own, their minds were gone...replaced by an cannibalistic desire to feed. Eventually, the government was able to actually respond to what was happening.
  • They tried to send out the death squad-esque NEO organization operatives to try and deal with this issue, feeling that they were up to the task due to their overall 'super-commando' style training. For a time, these operatives worked quite effectively, culling dozens of infected individuals, or Fungal's, as they came to be called. They used a combination of different tactics, ranging from snipers, to explosives, to chemical explosives, and even acid bombings. All of these worked, though a few eventually...stopped working. A few Fungal's had, somehow, survived the chemical explosions and survived the toxic chemical gas and thus adapted to it due to the strain of a few select lizard genomes, which allowed the survivors to in a sense, adapt to the chemicals used against them, effectively making them useless against a few Fungal's, though not all. Countless NEO operatives were killed, and the operation to use NEO operatives was counted a massive failure by the government, and an idiotic move by the government as well.
  • Eventually, NEMO came in along with most of the scattered military forces to try and deal with the issue of the Fungals. They brought with them weapons which spat out burning napalm flames, large armored machines which fired explosive shells, and much more to try and deal with this unknown and deadly threat that was the Fungals, the result of what had been good will to the people, for the people, all things considered. Military checkpoints were set up on street corners, some of which became overrun in the end, even with rotary gun emplacements and machine gun emplacements. Thousands of NEMO personnel and military personnel were slaughtered within the next year as they slowly scraped away at the large mass which was the Funglas. Eventually, the military was allowed to bring in bombers and assault aircraft, fire-bombing both streets and buildings alike. Sometimes, citizens would be caught in the cross-fire, though the military told themselves it was for the survival of their people. If a few people had to be killed to save billions, why not go for it? At least, that was the thinking of the military.
  • In time, over the course of two years, the Fungals were eradicated and their corpses either burned or sent down to the lowest underground levels, and then locked up under heavy electronic blast doors, to prevent anything, if anything was still alive, from getting in or, in the more likely scenario, getting out and starting havoc and mass death once more.

  • Winter Revolution
    • Both the Gulag Plague and the Funga-gulag Outbreak devastated Nyeon, along with Nyeon's governmental infrastructure. The military has been severely weakened, however they still were quite powerful. Public moral and opinion was in an all time low throughout all of Nyeon, people were severely unhappy with the state of things in their government and the state of things in their cities. Crime was rampant, their were constant riots and protests, billions had been killed, and government corruption was at an all time high.Public opinion was unsavory, especially public approval of President Jarvis Goodwil. He had been in office for eight years, his second term, before both the Gulag Plague and Funga-gulag outbreak occurred. During these events, President Goodwil had initiated emergency powers to be used, allowing him to stay in office indefinitely until both crisis's died down. He had now been in office for sixteen years, eight of which were within the correct rule of law, and eight of which were from the use of the 'Emergency Powers' edict initiated in the Nyeon constitution. When he first became president, he enacted sweeping reforms which helped to improve the living conditions of the poor. However, seven years in he had fallen to greed and the immense power that came with being President of a whole entire planet. Ever since his seventh year, each and every action of his had been morally corrupt and despicable, each action was filled with the lusting for greed and political power. Seemed, the people were having enough of his 'good-intention' service.
    • It had been a cold night. The wind was laughing wickedly as if it were some wicked witch, meaning to curse all who heard her laugh. The laughing wind was pushed back as chants raised to the air. They were angry chants, pleading chants, sorrowful chants, chants that wanted a change in the way things were run. Their was over a million thousand protesters and rioters walking across the snow-trodden, asphalt streets. Some had posters in hand, some wore bandannas to keep hidden their identities, others wore masks. Some had ignited flares in hand, their piercing red light resounding outwards onto a dark field of marching protesters like a cinematic photograph depicting what some would see, as art. The people flooded the streets, gathering at the main capitol building in Saligan, in the large plaza in front of the building. They were yelling all types of rhetoric, some of which were throwing things. Other protesters destroyed government and private property, smashing windows and destroying vehicles. They were causing destruction on an already ruined city, a city that had sought to rebuild.
    • Soon, President Goodwil was awakened, and countless NEO operatives and military personnel who weren't protesting, answered the call of President Goodwil. They pushed back the protesters, armed in riot-gear. Some had guns on hand, others had riot batons on hand. They were trying to push back the charging people, though it proved a fruitless attempt. Rocks were thrown at the riot-gear armed people, some people tried to attack these Riot-gear people, though their attempts proved fruitless as they were pushed back and attacked in self defense. Then, their was a gunshot. Nobody knew who had fired the first shot...chaos erupted from the first gunshot. The gunshot had struck one of the riot-gear operatives, hitting them in the neck before they were dragged back by medics on the scene. From that, came a hail of gunshots that resounded through the night. It was a massacre. In the wake of these gunshots, lay dozens upon dozens of protesters and rioters alike who had fallen dead from the hail of gunfire. Violent fighting broke out in response to these gunshots, many died in response to the newly ignited fires of violence, the date was the eighteenth. The night was lost to chaos. And the next day, the headlines in the holo-newspapers made people get up in arms. The Winter Revolution, had begun.

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(X) -'The Winter Massacre' and 'Remember the Eighteenth' became the first key phrases of the Winter Revolution. The Winter Massacre had set up millions in arms against the government and led to the formation of dozens of revolutionary groups. During this time, the two prominent revolutionary groups formed that still remain active to this day. One of which is the 'Winter Revolutionaries,' which is a remnant of the original group. The other being the 'Badger Insurrection,' a remnant of the original group, the Badgers. These two groups were key to overthrowing the government, however both groups committed numerous war crimes in the name of the Revolution.

  • Within the coming weeks, fighting would break out between the military and countless revolutionary cells and groups. The urban warfare could go on for days at a time or weeks, just within a block alone due to the shear amount of cover alone. To make matters worse for the military, the rebels had raided a number of military compounds, taking countless POW's along with taking lots of military equipment such as tanks, helicopters, explosives, ammunition, and many other military vehicles. This led to increased fighting on all fronts and more deadly fighting. During this period, both sides committed numerous war crimes to try and get an advantage over the other. At first, the government committed none...though that was until the rebel chemical attack on refugee camp Bravo. Hostilities increased since the rebel attack on this refugee camp and the fighting grew more grim from this one event. Countless buildings were destroyed along with a few major cities, a few of these cities would never be rebuilt and would just be left to ruin, to be overgrown and retaken by nature and plant life.
  • Eventually, and with much deliberation, the government brought in the help of NEO and NEMO, granting them more funding. Although, a close eye was kept on NEMO, just so that they wouldn't try anything again like what they had previously done during the Gulag Plague. NEO proved more than capable of handling it's self and dealing with the rebels. Their spies infiltrated numerous rebel organizations and helped to decimate these rebel cells as they revealed their location to the military. The spies also were able to sabotage numerous amounts of rebel weapons and vehicles, effectively stopping them in their tracks. During this time, NEMO also went through with their operations. NEMO operatives were effectively able to kill off a good amount of rebels through fire bombings and countless raids, who were also backed up by NEO operatives and agents as well.
  • The Winter Insurrection and the Badger Resistance, both of which are the 'ancestors' of the Winter Revolutionaries and the Badger Insurrection respectively, were the two major resistance groups at the time. They caused mass mayhem within the military ranks along with NEO and NEMO, what with their political assassinations. Both of these rebel organizations raided and destroyed numerous military outposts and even assassinated numerous cabinet members of the President's staff. They caused the most destruction, and even blew up part of Saligan by blowing up a large power plant. This, in turn, decimated most of the government's military. Which, was when the coup happened. Days after the massive power plant explosion, both NEO and NEMO conducted a joint coup against the government, with the support of rebel forces from the Badger Resistance. The coup happened fast overnight with some resistance from the remaining military. Though, in the morning of that day, the President was now out of office, and as per the deal, him and all other government members were handed over to the Badger Resistance. In the government's place, both Colonel Razaban Keys of NEO and DirectorReyes Vivian of NEMO, took control. They established, in place of the corrupt government, a join run oligarchic. And, miraculously, the rebels were fine with it...well when the laws were put in place and the government declared a cease fire for negotiations. With this, the head of the Badger Insurrection, General Nykoli Badger joined the Oligarchic. Eventually, the Badger family left the resistance group. It had been seven years since the revolution first started and now, they would rebuild.

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[X] - A picture now immortalized in memory as the end of the Winter Revolution. Badger Resistance members and Winter Insurrection members wave the revolutionary flag atop of a ruined building near the capital building after hearing news of a successful coup and the call for a cease-fire and negotiations.

 

  • Recovery & Present Day
    • ​The planet has recovered enormously since those turbulent times which were full of strife and death and torment and corruption. Government corruption, although still around and still a prevalent issue, is lower than it had been a century ago. Cities have been rebuilt, the population has boomed, and stability is at an all time high since the days of the Winter Revolution. Corporate corruption exists, and NEMO and NEO are as corrupt as ever, though things are happier, more peaceful on Nyeon. At least, for the most part. It had been over a hundred and fifty years since the Winter Revolution had ended, and things were looking up.

Edited by FN-2826, 18 July 2018 - 09:37 PM.

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#2
Vihar Hux

Vihar Hux

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Zeradias Mant

This is completed, can this be moved to be judged now, please?


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#3
Zeradias Mant

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Moved to live Codex for judging.

#4
Zark

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FN-2826

 

Under Review.


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#5
Zark

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FN-2826

 

This is a well detailed submission and its clear you've put a lot of thought into this world. I think its all a fun concept and has a lot of good story hooks to it, there are just a few things we have to touch on before I can pass it along.

 

The first and most glaring thing that needs to be addressed is your image sources. Pinterest is generally not an acceptable source for us, unless no other source for the image can be found online. You can use Google's search by image feature to track down the proper artists where it is possible. We also require you to list all your sources in the Image Credit field, although given how your hyperlinks are used as reference material throughout the submission I will allow you to keep them as is as long as you also list them in the master field. Your gifs also need to be sourced as well.

 

Now let's get into some more semantical stuff. Your description of Maqu indicates it is one of various unique planets in the system, and yet the only other planetary body that appears in this submission is Nyeon. Are there other planets besides the two? If yes, I would request at least a brief summary concerning each in the system features section.

 

Regarding the planet's government. Throughout the submission you reference it as both an oligarchy and dictatorship, while at times describing it more as a statocracy. Could you please clarify this section to make it more obvious who is actually in charge? Is it the oligarchs? A singular authority figure? The "elected" Senators? Or the military and secret police?

 

Lastly, your history for Nyeon heavily incorporates the Gulag Plague, which is all good we like to see people tying their works into site history. I just have some concerns over your timeline. The Gulag plague first spread over 400 years ago, with the virus thought to have naturally run its course for over a century now. But the timeline of this submission seems to present it as a part of the world's recent history. President Goodwill is described as in charge during the first outbreaks, and his administration lasts 16 years until the beginning of the Winter Revolution, which you describe as being only a century ago.

 

I like the idea of the virus playing a big role in this planet's political history, but I think you may need to make a few slight revisions there for that to jive with the board timeline.


Edited by Zark, 18 July 2018 - 09:14 PM.

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#6
Vihar Hux

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Zark

 

1. By master field, do you mean in the image credit area? Also, one, I've used Pinterest plenty of times before in the past on all of my factory subs and their has never been a problem with me only using Pinterest as an image source and nothing else. Why is this suddenly a problem all of the sudden, either way, it's an image site, and to get to the original image, you just click on the image when you are hyperlinked to Pinterest, so either way you get the 'main' source. Looking for the image through google is a needless waste of time, especially when you have large amount of images in your submission. Also, my gifs are linked in the short blurb of description blow them, they may be hard to see due to the small font size as I didn't want the [X]'s to be too obtrusive or distracting in long descriptions. Also, I don't see why I would need to relist the links already in the sub if they're basically already hyperlinked, their not really any point in hyperlinking an image link twice.

 

2. I didn't give a description to the other planet's in the system because their isn't really any need to do so as nothing of importance had happened on any of those worlds, save for maybe a simple mining outpost that is of no significant importance in the submission of this planet.

 

3. Okay, so I realized this would be an issue, but I hadn't an idea of where to put this in. The dictatorship part was a carry-over from the old government, as I changed the government to an oligarchy right before I posted the sub. The oligarchs hold total control of the planet, the senators act as 'law-makers' kind of in the sense they can decide on certain laws but other than that the senators cannot do much. As for NEMO and NEO, they hold a good amount of leeway in operating outside of the government, and since their family members are in the oligarchy, they can influence a fewlaw-making or policy decisions and changes.

 

4. I changed it to where President Goodwil issue NEO to capture the infected individuals on Nyeon, also with this, Nyeon was infected later into the gulag plague period due to it's planetary shield. I also added in that it's been a hundred and fifty years since the Winter Revolution.


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#7
Zark

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FN-2826

 

1. Yes I do mean the image credit field. Factory may have looser standards than codex, but as an image repository pinterest generally doesn't give credit to the original artist, which is the purpose of requesting image sources. Generally it is not accepted unless attempts to find a more direct source for the author are unsuccessful. The gifs too are either linked to pinterest or a hosted site, rather than given attribution to the game they come from. I know they're gifs, its impractical to track down who edited them together, but in this instance linking to for a example a wiki for the game they come from would be acceptable.

 

I understand in this case the amount of image links in this particular sub makes this request seem demanding, but these are the same standards we enforce on all codex submissions. The images get sourced to their artists if possible, and the links go in the image credit field.

 

2. That's fine, and like I said you can make it as short as a brief sentence-two sentence summary if you'd like. But if there are other planets in the solar system, I would ask that you at least list them and any distinguishing features about them.

 

3. I was referring specifically to the beginning of your Freedom & Oppression section, which starts out by referring to a dictator who is elected by the people for life. Maybe that would be an appropriate place to describe it. Your explanation looks good to me, tweak the language in the sub and that part is all set.

 

4. Alright, looks good to me.


Edited by Zark, 19 July 2018 - 12:29 AM.

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#8
Zark

Zark

    defy the tyrannous stars

  • Codex Judge
    • Character Bio
  • 654 posts

FN-2826

 

Status on this?


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#9
Zark

Zark

    defy the tyrannous stars

  • Codex Judge
    • Character Bio
  • 654 posts

FN-2826

 

Archived for inactivity. Please PM Allyson Locke or a RPJ for it to be pulled out of the archives, if you'd like to revisit the submission.


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