Edited by Richard Von, 17 August 2018 - 10:33 PM.
Posted 12 August 2018 - 06:55 PM
Posted 13 August 2018 - 11:04 PM
Manufacturer: DCC Industries
If you'll hyperlink this to the company submission page please.
Size:54 inches, Large Weight: 20 LBS Heavy
These actually use ratings, rather than specific measurements. Here are your options for these fields per the template:
Size: (Please choose a size between Very Small, Small, Average, Large, Very Large and Extreme.)
Weight: (Please choose a weight between Very Light, Light, Average, Heavy, Very Heavy and Extreme.)
It has amazing firepower which will leave massive holes in whatever it hits going through most battle armor if it didn't penetrate completely the force of impact alone would kill a regular human
This is a bit too powerful,and it doesnt take into account different situations or different types of armor. As a suggestion, you could state that this is "designed to pierce through common battle armors".
I have not seen a blaster weapon that producesenough physical impact to kill someone. While energy weapons do seem to produce some physical impact, this is a secondary effect at most, as they inflict most of their damage through thermal energy rather than kinetic impact.
Posted 16 August 2018 - 11:06 PM
It has amazing firepower which will go through most common armors and have some small physical impact.
"Will" is another word to avoid, as again, this looks like it's dictating damage to an enemy. If you would please replace "will" with "can","designed to" , or some other wording which suggests damage.
Posted 17 August 2018 - 05:17 PM
It has amazing firepower which will go through most common armors and small unarmored vehicles.
This is a no-no, as it's using "will", which as I mentioned above, is not an acceptable word to use when describing damage.
If you want to use "designed to go trhough most common armors and unarmored vehicles", that is all right. But again, we cannot tell someone what damage is going to occur. That's ultimately up to the defending writer.