A Blue Milk Run

[Kana Truden]

To say not much had happened since the last time Kana and [member="Seraphina Shel'tah"] truly saw each other would be an understatement, but still somewhat correct. The only 'real' thing that had happened was the invasion of Manaan. That wasn’t one of those things you simply waved away with the back of your hand. It wasn't a beautiful memory. Kana had taken a beating and Sera along with Master Raaf had rescued her. The memory was hazy but the last moments of comfort before passing out in her padawan's lap had been, well, nice. As odd as it was.

For the moment there were ‘Order Business’ to attend to. Kana usually handled it alone, there was after all no need to endanger others or risk anything happening but today felt different. Call it a teacher being overly attached to their student but she wanted, no, requested, no actually, demanded that Seraphina came along for what promised to be a blue milk run. Which, to be honest, it most likely was. They were going to find themselves crystals, but not just for themselves but others within the order as well.

Standing in front of [member="Corvus Raaf"]’s ship Kana had, once more, found herself early. Being as patient as ever she waited for her student to arrive. Datapad in hand she ran through the instructions once more. The steps were simple, find crystal, harvest crystal, bring crystal home. Almost by definition a blue milk run.

Kana took a seat on the loading ramp. This was not the first time she had taken ‘Raven’ for a ride without Corvus’ consent, but then again the councilor was most likely used to it by now. Besides, it was probably did that translation droid of hers some good to talk to someone else now and then.

“Ilum crystals. Ilum.” A name she repeated a few times before sighing. “Well, at least it’s not Rhen Var.”

 

[Seraphina Shel'tah]

It's morning. You should get up now. Come on...Are you listening? Master [member="Kana Truden"] is waiting you know...GET UP YOU HAVE KARKING WORK TO DO.

"Ugh..." The Twi'lek sat up in her bed and rubbed her eyes, still groggy and unmotivated. Her master wanted to drag her off to Ilum, the frozen hell out in the unknown regions to likely freeze to death. If it was one thing she hated, it was the cold. The two had been apart for a bit after leaving Manaan, Kana needed time to heal, as did Sera. She was also partially ashamed for wishing she had simply killed the human Sith, and letting herself get carried away with emotion. Perhaps Kana was too focused on other things or too out of it to have really noticed though, so she might get away without a discussion on the matter.

Deciding she should probably meet with her master soon before she sent out a search and rescue crew, she gathered up what she'd need for the travel and headed to the hangar where she was directed. As she approached the vessel they would be using to get to the ice prison of a planet she noticed Kana sitting on the loading ramp and greeted her. "Good morning, master. I'm sorry I'm late, my bed was just way more comforting than the idea of freezing to death on Ilum." She laughed, only somewhat joking, she really hated the cold.

 

[Kana Truden]

Oh this was familiar. The late student padding the excuses with humor. It had never worked for Kana and to see the tables turned and to have the humor used on her this time around caused her to laugh. Not a big roaring laughter, but a small laughter made it’s way out of her system nonetheless. Kana's hand reached up to cover her mouth as she cleared her throat.

“It’s quite alright, Sera.” Kana bowed. “I’ve been to a place worse than Ilum called Rhen Var. That place is considerably much more of a freezing death pit, trust me on that.”

Kana got up from the loading ramp and waved at her padawan to follow her onto the ship. The ever familiar insides of ‘Raven’ was as welcoming as ever. A home away from home to Kana and Corvus alike though the question of who truly enjoyed it the most was still up for debate. At least Kana hadn’t made - or caused reason to have - the crash logs yet. The somewhat cramped corridors struck the right nerve and Kana let herself relax maybe just a bit too much.

“Welcome aboard Councilor Corvus’ personal ship.” Kana lift her arm to the side in a welcome. “More commonly known as Raven but I prefer to call it home.”

Now, what was a good way to bake this all into a talk about emotions and why jedi need to contain them? Kana had her idea, but for now a pleasant talk would have to do. They were after all in the one safe haven Kana had that would never go away no matter how hard others would try to take it away from her.

Oh yeah, Raven had been rebuilt a few times before. Yes she had, especially after that one trip to Nar Shaddaa.

[member="Seraphina Shel'tah"]​

 

[Seraphina Shel'tah]

The expression of mild disbelief danced across Sera's face as [member="Kana Truden"] mentioned of a worse frozen hell hole than Ilum. That planet was nothing short of a wasteland where Jedi were forced to endure the full wrath of nature, its cold, dark, unwelcoming wrath. Why the Jedi didn't just harvest vast amounts of these so we'd never need to come back I'll never understand.

"I would say I don't believe you, but I'd rather not have you change our course for Rhen Var to find out for myself." As the pair entered into the ship Sera looked around at everything. She enjoyed seeing the insides of vessels, even though she knew next to nothing about them. Still, it was interesting to her to see. "Wait...This is Master Raaf's ship?" The Twi'lek girl squinted her eyes as she focused on Kana, "Does she know you're taking her ship? Am I going to look out of the port window to see her running toward the landing pad as we are taking off?"

The Padawan placed her belongings down, and offered to take Kana's as well before continuing their walk through the ship.

 

[Kana Truden]

The worry was understandable as the joke was inappropriate. At least to a degree.

“No, relax.” Though it had happened once. The memory made Kana chuckle. “We jedi do not have any real possessions. The ship actually belongs to the Order but because both me and Master Raaf use this ship for everything we ever do we’ve simply come to call it our own.”

“It’s really not though.” A bag-carrying hand extended itself for Sera to grabs. As the bag was safely stowed away she followed it with a bow. “Thank you.”

‘Master Truden’ let herself fall into the pilot’s seat and with a quick spin she found herself getting straight to work in preparation for take-off. Occasionally her eyes wandered aside to look at [member="Seraphina Shel'tah"]. She had to work up to it, outright asking ‘so how about those emotions, huh?’ felt weird. No, she had to be smart about it. Somehow.

An open hand gestured at Sera to take a seat in the co-pilot’s seat. “It’s going to be a long trip. If you’ve got any questions or if we have something to discuss, now would be as good of a time as ever to do so.”

Kana gave Seraphina that look. The look that said 'We do, and you know it.'

 

[Seraphina Shel'tah]

[member="Kana Truden"]

The Padawan giggled, slightly disappointed that she wouldn't see Master Raaf chasing them down the landing pad, but nodded in acknowledgement as she set Kana's bag to rest with hers. "I see. Well that makes sense then."

Following Kana to the cockpit she sat down and strapped in. She was far from an ace pilot, but she could manage if needed. She was excited to be able to get out for a while, even if it was to Ilum. Manaan left a sour taste in her mouth and she needed to shake it off. As the engines fired and the ship prepared to take lift, Sera felt the burning gaze of Kana. It was nearly soul piercing. Ugh. Does she know? "Is something bothering you, master?"

 

[Kana Truden]

Here it went. Kana’s first ever serious talk with a Padawan. She wasn’t sure what approach to pick. Would she go with the easy teacher or tough guy act? Could she even pull the tough guy act off?

“It’s Manaan.” This was Kana’s responsibility yet eye contact felt impossible. “Before passing out I felt anger. Your anger.”

Attention set for the controls again. It wasn’t a discussion she’d hoped to bring up so soon but when you find yourself in a situation such as on Manaan there was little you could do but feel at least a little bit agitated. In a sense it was completely understandable, but it still went against what was ‘right’.

“I don’t need to remind you about the importance of keeping emotions in check. I trust you know better but I want you to tell me what happened. I want to know who, when and where this was.”

[member="Seraphina Shel'tah"]​

 

[Seraphina Shel'tah]

Manaan. That word grew into a tree that bore no fruit, but was laborous and tiresome to tend. She does know. Of course she knew...Don't be an idiot Sera. Just tell her, it will be a lot easier that way.

Placing her hands on the back of her head, she glided them slowly down each of her Lekku, exhaling through her slightly parted lips. Her nose twitched side to side as she gathered up her thoughts. "Master, I-" She paused, unsure of how exactly to word things. "I found myself in one of the complexes that delivers electricity to the city. There was a human Sith acolyte there. We talked, for however much that is worth to a Sith, before engaging one another. We traded a few blows, she managed to destroy one of my lightsabers." Sera sighed again, stalling as long as possible before getting to the 'ending' of the story. "The building was being shelled with mortars by either Sith or Republic forces, it was hard to determine, but things weren't going well. The Sith gave me her name, Xhexania, and tried telling me of how the Sith are nothing like we make them out to be, despite my witnessing her murder several soldiers in front of me."

The tension was so thick at this point Sera wanted to simply crawl back into bed and pretend that Manaan was nothing more than a bad dream. "The building eventually collapsed part way on itself with us inside. The generator had a catastrophic failure, and I became the energy, and shrapnel's exit. The acolyte managed to avoid the blast, but there was nowhere for me to go. Following that a bit of falling duracrete knocked me to the ground. That was where I sustained the bulk of my own injuries."

Sera looked over to Kana, closing her eyes as she lowered her head and continued with the rest of the story. "Another Sith had found us. He made an attempt to kill me, and instead, the human girl put her lightsaber through his back. She saved me, claiming that there is no honor in killing the weak. I still don't quite understand it, but she saved my life. So as we crawled through the rubble to an exit, we found ourselves surrounded by a group of Republic soldiers."

She took another deep breath, her eyes still closed as she recapped the event as it unfolded once again in her mind, as clearly as if it were happening all over again. "I pleaded with her not to attack them, I ordered the soldiers to stand down. I promised Xhex I would get her safely away, in exchange for saving my life. Perhaps it was wrong of me, but it felt proper to repay the favor, no matter the circumstance. She agreed, and lowered her saber. Master Raaf showed up while we were talking. I explained the situation to her and she agreed with my decision as well. However, as we turned to leave another Sith Lord interrupted us."

Clenching her hands as she shook her head, her mind still focused on the memory. "The Sith betrayed my trust, and ordered both Master Raaf and I to surrender, and be taken prisoner, or die. She then killed the Republic troops using some kind of Sith mind control. I took the opportunity to leap off the bridge and take my chances in the ocean as I called for a dropship. This was why I was angry. If I had just killed her myself as we were crawling through the rubble to escape, I could have saved the lives of those Republic soldiers, and the world would have been rid of one more Sith. I expected trust from a Sith, and I got nothing less than what should have been expected. People died, because of me."

The Twi'lek rubbed her eyes with her index finger and thumb, returning her focus to Kana. "When Corvus and I picked you up on the ground next to that fountain, and I had a chance to see all of the damage, and all of the pain they caused, it angered me. It angered me that I was leaving them to their fate. It angered me that I couldn't save those soldiers. It angered me to see what they did to you. I try not to let these things get to me, like we're instructed, but something of that magnitude, how does one simply....block that out?"

[member="Kana Truden"]

 

[Kana Truden]

The story unravelled itself and Kana gave [member="Seraphina Shel'tah"] her complete attention. The power plant - or similar - and the mortars. The latter made thoughts of Manaan resurface. The breath-shattering, dirt-tossing, life-taking mortars. The urge to phase out, just stare into the distance was hard to resist but she had to. Sera deserved the attention, to have Kana listen and Kana needed to listen. So she had both been saved and double-crossed by a sith before a lord appeared. Considering Master Raaf had been present there was little doubt as to who it was. Particularly with the ‘surrender’ they so courteously offered.

But the familiarity of the emotions weren’t lost on her. To feel as if lives were lost because of your actions, that somehow you were the cause of those men and women. Kana knew it well since the Sith set fire to Zeltros.

“You don’t.” Kana shook her head in regret. A shaky breath left her system and she turned back to the flight controls. “I still ask myself how many lives was quieted because I couldn’t prevent Reverance from reaching that generator room. If I had just been smarter, not have let my arm be broken and shoulder cut…”

Kana’s finger and thumb ran along the bridge of her nose. “It’s only natural that you feel guilty, angry and upset. I understand you. I have felt what you felt before back when the Sith set fire to Zeltros. I asked myself if I could have done anything to prevent it, if all the lives lost was somehow my fault, but it wasn’t. No matter what you do there is nothing you could have done differently.”

A supportive smile made it’s way to Seraphina. “There is not much I can do but offer you whatever support you need if you ever need to talk. The emotional turmoil is something you within yourself need to come to terms with. I recommend meditation for that. As long as you don’t dwell on what has happened but what will happen in the future there will be clarity. Leave the past in the past and let those who died rest in peace. Be a pillar of hope that stands to counter the darkness that seeks to consume us all and you will go far.”

There was a short pause for dramatic effect and to wipe the emotional moment clear of all the gloom. “I have nothing but faith in you, Sera. During your encounter you could have let the acolyte lure you in but you refused, not many would have done that. If anything you should be proud. I know I am.”

Warm smiles were what Kana did best and Sera received a most sincere one. “Don’t worry, keeping check of emotions becomes a lot more easier than you think after a while.”

 

[Seraphina Shel'tah]

Sera placed her hand on Kana's shoulder and smiled, "Nobody lets their arm get broken, master. I am just sorry I didn't make it to you sooner. But I am glad we found you there when we did." She patted Kana lightly before taking her hand away, "It all just seems like some kind of crazy nightmare that I'll wake up from and realize I was daydreaming this whole time, and I've missed half the party going on, you know? I just find it difficult to shake that feeling of anxiety away. It's just senseless."

Tucking her hands underneath one another she shrugged her shoulders "Once in a while I lay in bed wondering what is happening there right now. There's just no explanation for why they do what they do. Xhex made mention of knowledge and peace, but it was such backwards logic it seemed to be nothing more than some circular jargon made to confuse the person you're explaining it to simply to get them to agree, and nothing more than that. All I see is injustice and warmongering. How does one blindly follow that?"

She listened to Kana as she finished speaking before offering up any more words of her own. "I don't know if simply not joining the Sith is really anything to be proud of, to me, that is just simply a wrong decision, just as wrong as blatantly killing someone. But I have these dreams sometimes where she is there, and I am given the opportunity to end her, and when I hesitate, she kills me. I wake up sweating in a panic. I don't know what to make of it, or how I should feel. Am I supposed to kill her? If I know the outcome otherwise? It scares me to wonder if it is nothing more than a dream, or some kind of sign."

[member="Kana Truden"]

 

[Kana Truden]

Of course nobody gets lets their arm be broken but there was still a small hint of truth behind it. Still, defeatism had gotten in Kana’s way before. To dwell on it was not productive in the least and she let the topic wander without saying much. A thankful nod and smile and then her student could go on.

The conversation moved onto nightmares. A subject Kana knew well. The thoughts that somehow it’s all a cruel joke and that sometime soon someone will wake up and tell you that it was all a big joke was not a mystery to her. To lie in bed and think about what could have happened. Kana held back the urge to snicker at the mention of what she assumed to be Knight Kelloch’s - or VIPER as some call him - and his actions on Manaan. To think she had once known that man.

“You make me think back to Manaan. Of VlPER and what he did and what Knight Kelloch did was wrong. A jedi never kills, not even for the greater good.” A wave of regret washed over Kana. Maybe she could have stopped this from happening as well. “A jedi must only draw their saber if ready to take a life, but a jedi still cares for all life. What he did was certainly the former, but I have no idea how much of it was the latter… He has always been brash in his decisions. Ever since we were padawans together him, me and Master Raaf.”

“This invasion was the first time I saw - or well, heard of him - in a very long time and it worries me what has become of him now. The casualty lists has him pinned as MIA. If that means an old acquaintance of mine has turned on the Jedi or fled the consequences of his actions, then-…” Kana lift her arms in a hopeless shrug. “I should have known better. The jedi have taken on a lot of heat because of his actions and there is no telling how what will happen if he continues down the path he’s started.”

“Once we’re done with this business I will await the council’s judgement and act accordingly. One way or the other I will help bring him back.”

She shook her head, a change of topic felt right.

“Anyway, I’m sure the order will appreciate the crystals we’re off to harvest for them. We’re not going for just one, we’re going for one each here. We’re going to gather a small collection of crystals so that in case things happen - such as with your lightsaber on Manaan - we don’t have to risk more trips here than necessary.”

[member="Seraphina Shel'tah"]

 

[Seraphina Shel'tah]

Sera thought on VIPER for a while. She didn't know the Knight at all, so she couldn't form her own opinion of him. "Perhaps Master, but we'll never really know until we hear his side of the story. And we would need to find where he is in order to do that. Do we have even the smallest lead as to where he could be?"

As Kana changed the subject to the topic of crystals, it reminded her again of where they were going. Ilum. To dig in the snow on Ilum. "Well, I suppose now is as good a time as ever to replace my own crystal as well, as long as it's not too much trouble. I know we need to gather more for the Order."

The Twi'lek loooked down at her belt, her purple saber lingering alone, its partner missing since the battle of Manaan. "I shouldn't have been so careless. That Sith got the better of me, it could have cost me much more than just that blade."

[member="Kana Truden"]

 

[Kana Truden]

No leads indeed, had Kana had time to react to it she would have told her padawan more about Knight Kelloch but it seemed unnecessary, for now at least. Instead she simply nodded as Sera wanted to find a new crystal and repair her saber. It could be boiled down to luck almost that Kana hadn’t lost hers on Manaan.

“Of course we can see to it.” A nod. “Just remind me when we get there.”

Then they moved back to Zeltros, technically. At least Kana did, but that was more her own story. Eyes set on her forearm. That’s where the cut of the poison dagger had struck her. That’s where Kana had lost it. That’s where she had her first proper taste of the dark side, and when she swore to never be so stupid again.

“Yes, it could have.” Kana looked at [member="Seraphina Shel'tah"] . “But it didn’t and you lived to learn. I learned to practice my ambidexterity on Manaan. I was like a sitting duck with my arm broken, but now I know the importance of practicing both hands. Also armor, Zeltros taught me to never underestimate armor. If you can I’d recommend seeking out one of your own. It doesn’t have to be the best and preferably something light, but it’s better to be safe than sorry when you fight the people that we do.”

She would have worn armor if not for the fact that the invasion on Manaan came as a total surprise. Kana set sight for the controls again. Ilum wasn’t far away now.

 

[Seraphina Shel'tah]

The young Twi'lek smiled at [member="Kana Truden"] with her nod to help repair her ruined lightsaber. "Thank you, master. I will see to it that I don't lose it again."

With Kana reminiscing on Manaan, Sera thought it prudent to speak up, not wanting to have a repeat of Manaan again anytime soon. "In whatever battles come, I will be at your side." She smiled slightly, a slight joke but also entirely serious in meaning, "I will make sure you don't get your arms broken, and you make sure nobody carves my lightsabers, or myself, into pieces."

Armor...Hmm. She had never really considered wearing armor. Most of the time blasters were nothing of great concern to her, so she wasn't entirely worried about that, and lightsabers were generally not caring of relatively any type of material, so it had always seemed for the most part a hinderance than anything. However, she could understand the desire, given that armor would have saved her side from welcoming a helping of shrapnel into her body. Unexpected projectiles, debris, and if caught off guard from blasters and other weapons would prove to be good examples as well. "Perhaps it is something to consider, I appreciate the advice. Armor may have saved me from some of the grief during the collapse of the building back on Manaan."

As they got closer to Ilum, her body shivered as if she were already standing on the surface. Couldn't these crystals grow somewhere warmer? With beaches, and sand?

 

[Kana Truden]

The passing lights outside the cockpit came to a halt no sooner than the conversation ended and the master and her padawan found themselves greeted by the big floating sphere that was Ilum. There was little Kana could do but quietly chuckle as she threw [member="Seraphina Shel'tah"] a most amused look. Cold was nothing as long as they had brought the right equipment.

“Well, Sera…” Kana looked at the cold planet. “Welcome to Ilum.”

With the push of a few buttons she urged her student to remain seated. The ship shook as they breached the atmosphere, but not by much. Before long the gears set foot on the ground and the engines could safely be turned off. A look at the temperature would probably make the heart stop for some, but at least they could find solace in that the caves weren’t far off.

“I hope you brought your jacket as well as your saber.” Kana opened the ramp, the temperature within the ship sunk by an instant. “We’re gonna need it.” Her hands clasped together in a snap. “Now, are you ready to get this over with so we can go home again?”

Kana smiled. At least this time there wouldn't be any spiders and other horrible creatures to distract them.

 

[Seraphina Shel'tah]

Sera glanced out through the cockpit window,, over the frozen wasteland of Ilum. A pre-emptive shiver coursed through her body. "Oh, I've packed more than just a jacket, master." As the girl unlatched herself from her seat upon touch down, she headed back toward where they had stowed their gear. Unzipping the satchel she had with her, she removed a double-layered pair of ice-climbing pants, a thick fur jacket with thermal inner lining, and a pair of power cell charged heated boots and gloves. Finally, she removed a face mask which could serve to stave off some of the wind chill that gusted about the outside of the caverns.

It took her several minutes to get everything ready, and upon completing her ensemble, presented herself to [member="Kana Truden"] with a single word and a smile, lightsaber in hand. "Ready."

 

[Kana Truden]

The first step into the snow was followed by another and soon Kana found herself trudging along in the snow. It was back to the same old sensory abilities she had come to rely on during the trips to Rhen Var. The cold smacked her in the face as flake for flake whipped against her cheeks. A look back at [member="Seraphina Shel'tah"] had her waving her arm to maintain some form of communication. The idea of telepathy had crossed her mind but decided this was much better when it came to giving away locations.

“It’s not far!” The wind was still not her friend. “The caves aren’t hard to miss! Centuries of jedi has made the entrance quite spectacular I hear!”

She continued the push. Her left leg slowly started to feel colder, her right leg ran at peak performance. The benefits of a robot leg, perhaps. The lack of any sort of feel made things bearable to say the least.

They climbed to the top and off in the near-distance was the big gates, the magnificent doors to the crystal cave. “Well, behind those doors are the caves. It's not too far now.”

Determination pushed Kana onward as the snowfall quieted down somewhat. They'd do the potential talking inside the caves, no doubt about it.

 

[Seraphina Shel'tah]

Centuries of Jedi should have made a landing pad inside the bloody caves. It's too damned cold out!

The Twi'lek wanted to respond to Kana's directions and comments, but her voice refused to cooperate in the midst of the wind and chill. Instead, she simply nodded, assuming Kana could see it, and followed as close behind as she could. Sera wasn't quite sure which was worse, the frigid cold of the planet itself, or the relentless wind gusts that felt as though she were being whipped across the face second after second. She was certain by the time they made it into the caves she would have frostbite in several places.

As [member="Kana Truden"] pointed out the gates leading toward the caves entrance, Sera lifted the hood a bit on her jacket and looked ahead at the large, spectacular looking gateway. "Let's hurry then!" The snow was deep, but she lifted her small frame up and over the snow, one foot after the other in high, long steps. She could feel the cold beginning to penetrate her boots and was anxious to get some relief from within the cave. Even if it were cold, it wouldn't be this cold inside. And that was better than nothing.

 

[Kana Truden]

Kana chuckled. “You got it.”

The push through the cold was as comfortable as one could expect with it’s biting cold but Kana would take cold over extreme warmth any day. Just as long as she didn’t die in an ungracefully ‘huddling for warmth’ kind of position she’d be fine. The thought made her chuckle again. There’d be no dying today, gathering of crystals that could cause dying? Sure, but not any actual dying.

Slowly but steadily they got closer to the grand gateway. Eyes wander up and down before finally finding two smaller doors at the very bottom which got a genuine laughter out of Kana.

“You’d think the gates were the actual doors, right? Like if you had to use the force or something to open them.” Kana opened one of the smaller doors. “I guess not, huh? Well, after you.”

She waved her hand between [member="Seraphina Shel'tah"] and the door. “You’re the one who needs a crystal the most after all.”

 

[Seraphina Shel'tah]

"That is actually a tad bit disappointing honestly." Sera sighed as she looked at the small door, glancing up to the large gates. "A grand pair of gates, and honestly no use for them."

She nodded to [member="Kana Truden"] and passed through the doorway, looking down into the caves. "Don't remind me. At least we'll be out of this karking snow." The Padawan looked down into the large tunnels, mostly cleared of snow with the exception of the mouth of the entrance. Winding paths and black stone lined the magnificent looking caverns. Far into the distance she could see the shimmering glow of bluish green crystals. Light footprints from previous visitors graced the first few meters of the entryway, along with small carvings of names along the cave walls would mark the centuries old Jedi who first graced this pathway.

"This might be the one beautiful place this entire frostbitten planet holds." Sera smiled towards Kana as they began to wander in, and out of the blistering cold.