Renegade Rodian
OUT OF CHARACTER INFORMATION
- Intent: Feed the galaxy, one can of goop at a time.
- Image Source: N/A
- Restricted Missions: Yes yes yes.
- Primary Sources: Stormtrooper Rations, Nutrient Paste
- Name: Adjustable Nutrient Supplemented Ration (ANSR)
- Manufacturer: Helix Syndicate
- Production: Mass
- Affiliation: Open Market
- Modularity: Yes (Self-Heating cans, flavor packets)
- Legal Status: Legal
- Ingredients: Meat, Vegetables, Love, Millaflower extract
- Classification: Ration / MRE
- Method of Consumption: Oral
- Average Life: Complete consumption will satisfy hunger for up to eight hours. Some users may experience a calming effect for one to two hours after consumption. ANSRs can be stored indefinitely if sealed, or opened if refrigerated.
- Nutritional Value/Allergies: Like standard nutrient paste or Stormtrooper rations, consumption of an ANSR fulfills 1/3rd of daily recommended intake for most vitamins and minerals. It’s also quite filling. Of course, if you eat an ANSR not intended for your species you may experience unintended side-effects.
While nutrient paste and Stormtrooper rations are all well and good, they only appeal to a small section of the galaxy’s population. That is, humans. The galaxy is filled with many different species, all with different dietary requirements. Thanks to a simplified process of creating ANSRs derived from the same process by which nutrient paste and stormtrooper rations were made, the Helix Syndicate can rapidly manufacture similar rations for different species. Of course, these tend to only be the species who have the buying power to make producing them worthwhile. No ANSRs for Ewoks, I’m afraid.
STRENGTHS & WEAKNESSES
- [Strength] Eating an ANSR is both filling and healthy. Yum! Paste.
- [Strength] Thanks to carefully modulated quantities of Millaflower extract, consumers of ANSRs will experience a profound sense of calm and relaxation for a short period after consumption. Great for destressing!
- [Weakness] The calming sensation provided by the Millaflower may lead to addiction. But, you know, that depends on your own disposition already.
Starving to death? Not getting the nutrition you need? Tired of solid bowel movements? Look no further, friend! Helix Syndicate has the ANSR!
Adjustable Nutrient Supplemented Ration (or ANSR) is the latest and greatest in food-based nutrient-enriched paste technology! One ANSR is equivalent to 1/3rd of your daily recommended intake for virtually all essential vitamins and minerals. Previously, this sort of convenience was primarily for humans. Thanks to an easily adjusted manufacturing process implemented by the Helix Syndicate, however, ANSRs are rolling off the assembly line for everyone! Kubaz? Not a problem. Wookiee? You bet! Terrelian Jango Jumper? I don’t even know what that is, but we’ve got it!
ANSRs, even when heated, retain a texture roughly similar to peanut butter but are completely flavorless. Don’t let that put you off, though! For a paltry additional fee, you can order ANSRs in self-heating cans and personalized flavor packets! Want an ANSR that tastes like Bantha steak? Coming right on up, pal! The possibilities are endless!
Everyone loves a good ANSR - partly because they’re just so relaxing! If you’re eating ANSRs, chances are you’re in a stressful spot. That’s why our secret formula is able to soothe, comfort, and relax you shortly after consumption. Getting an ANSR has never been more liberating!
But don’t take our word for it! Take a gander at these customer testimonials!
“My momma don’ yell’t me after dinner no mo’, so tha’s good I reckon. Taste a’ight too.”
- Bo Thorton, Coruscant, age 15
“Food’s good, but crushing one of the self-heating cans against my forehead left me with a nasty third degree burn. Now everybody calls me Bullseye.”
- Minglus Tharn, Mandalore, age 29
“Y' ahor drink hup goblet ot manifold orr'e - ya ascent ahor ah glorious ng petulant thrashing ot ymg' orr'enah ah'legeth ah l' mgeptharanak fitting, mnahn' zhro. Ah nafl mgah ya nog. Ph'nglui mgr'luh ph'nilgh'ri ng kadishtu ya peace.”
- Kreijyail’aihw the Undying, The Seat of Aeons, age 8147
