Am I really This Desperate?

[Dara Gola]

Nyrres guided her ship towards the planet Ossus. As the planet filled her cockpit glass she reflected on how long ago it was since she had stepped foot on the surface. Seven years... It feels like a lifetime since I walked through the temple gates. She glanced down at her hand, a sadness filling her as she thought about all of the things that had changed in her life since those days. She guided her ship towards the Jedi temple and opened her coms " Padawan Nyrrea Vodrine requesting an audience with Grand-master [member="Corvus Raaf"]." She cut the coms off and guided her ship towards one of the many open landing pads. I really hope no one notices that officially I have been missing for seven years. Maybe with all of the chaos things will have allowed me to slip through the cracks. She didn't have much faith in that outcome, but she was out of options.

The Sith had allowed her to exist in their presence because she served a purpose. She was largely ignored by them, except for that lunatic with the rasp she thought. Their indifference to her existence allowed her to slip away in the night, taking her ship and leaving a soon as it was safe. She wasn't sure what would happen now, she had helped them... killed for them. She only hoped that the conversation lasted long enough for her to try to explain what happened before [member="Corvus Raaf"] had her hauled off to whatever punishment she was given.

She landed and opened the cockpit to her small craft. She stood and grabbed the lightsaber she had been given and her blaster and laughs slightly, Like this thing is going to do any good against her if things go wrong. She knew she would be unable to stop whatever might happen, but wearing the blaster and the accursed lightsaber made her feel better.

She climbed down the fold away latter and headed for the temple, and the most important conversation of her live.

 

[Corvus Raaf]

Corvus had just finished a lesson with some Younglings. She was convinced the administrators did it on purpose. Every lesson on Attachments seemed to fall to her and the Younglings spend half the time speculating which Jedi would be good for her to settle down with.

So she received the message she was wanted at the hangar a little later than expected – due to the fact she had to explain that she wasn’t going to marry any of their suggestions.

So she hurried as best she could and wondered if the visitor would wait or be shown up to the Academy. As she entered the grounds she was greeted by the sight of a Twi’lek – and the first things she noticed was that her aura wasn’t precisely Light-sided. The second thing she noticed was the saber and blaster. So much for security, she thought as she smiled at the newcomer.

Corvus bowed politely and smiled again. “Welcome to the Ossus Academy. My name is Corvus and how can I help you?”

[member="Nyrrea Danton"]

 

[Dara Gola]

Nyrrea was shocked to see [member="Corvus Raaf"] when she appeared, not only did she not have any bodyguards with her, but she approached as if it were a friendly meeting. The kind of calm and control that she exuded as she approached was unsettling. After so many months with the Sith she had grown accustomed to the pure malice that seemed to shine off of every one of the Sith lords she encountered. She stood there for a long second, unsure of what to say, not entirely as prepared for this moment as she thought she was. " I.. uh.. I was a padawan here a long time ago. I am not sure what I need help with, I just need help."

She took a deep breath and her body was noticeably more relaxed as she finally got the words off of her chest. Her emotions were boiling around her, the touch of the dark side was visible in her, and the hilt at her waist felt dirty. " I don't even know where to begin, I have done some terrible things in the last few months."

 

[Corvus Raaf]

Corvus felt she was a reasonable judge of a situation. This person posed no immediate threat - the Force would have warned her. And the last things she probably needed was either a lecture or a long and drawn out speech about what Corvus thought of the situation.

So Corvus smiled and indicated they should walk. "I have a favourite place to chat - it's called the Meditation Pavilion. Apparently it was Master Skywalker's too." She kept her tone even and friendly although this was not forced, she'd spoken to a Sith Knight in the middle of the Invasion of Kashyyk with the same tone - it just came naturally to her.

"What you have done is far less important than what you're going to do. So feel free to talk and tell me anything and everything you want and ask me whatever you need answers to."

[member="Nyrrea Danton"]

 

[Dara Gola]

Nyrrea nodded and fell into step with the Jedi master. She listened as the other woman talked about the pavilion. her voice was calm and even, explaining the things that deep down Nyrrea knew she had heard a hundred times before when she was a youngling. she tried to compose herself as he thought of a spot to start talking, someplace to begin, but there was so much turmoil these last seven years she wasn't sure what was an appropriate point.

" I betrayed the Republic at Rendili, I knew a back way onto the shipyard and I led them there." She looked down, knowing that she would have been ashamed but she had survived and that was all she cared about. " I have worked with them since then, I snuck away at Lujo, but the damage has been done. My question to you, Master Raff, is what do I do now? I am not a Jedi anymore, and i can't go back to the Sith. Do I just go back to being a bounty hunter and live my life one job at a time?"

[member="Corvus Raaf"]

 

[Corvus Raaf]

Corvus sensed the turmoil and kept silent. Nyrrea would speak when she was good and ready and filling the silence with her own babbling would achieve nothing.

And then she listened. What do you say to someone who has committed betrayal? You can’t exactly empathise, or sympathise. So she just let the words flow until they stopped.

“My obvious answer is a simple one. What do you want to do now? You can be whatever you want, it is only you that is stopping it. And that’s not me convincing you to return to the Light. It is me encouraging you to follow your own path. There will always be a place here for you if you want it. It is in many way s no less lonely than the life of a bounty hunter.”

Corvus pushed out of her mind the fact that almost her entire family had just been murdered by a bounty hunter who had looked to collect on the reward for capturing a Jedi set by the One Sith. “In your heart, what do you truly want to do?”

[member="Nyrrea Danton"]