Awakening

[Stardust Solus Skirae]

2 weeks later after the rescue on roon

Two bloody weeks
The docs weren't even sure if he was gonna wake up at all
They said his body was beyond exhausted and his bmi had dropped severely. They also noted his eyes were damaged by what they couldn't exactly determine.

Two weeks

Stardust had hardly left the room they had set up for him, modeled after the interior of their home with the exception was it was in a thick metal room with a sealed door..stardust couldn't risk gray flipping out as he woke up. Machines beeped a iv in his arm to feed him nourishment

Stardust would sit for hours till they said it was time to go...even then she got round the clock reports on her husband...they notes brainwave activity was abnormal but would need extra time to find out and soft through the data they had received.

She was just arriving in fact, she stepped into the hositpial and gave her code word guided down the halls twisting and turning before coming to a metal door. After inputting a code scanning her eye and finger she was let on in....she soared nothing past security as she didn't want anyone coming for her husband...

Within the room she moved to his bed and sighed setting at a nearby seat watching him...hoping he'd wake up to shed light on what happened
[member="Gray Raxis"]

 

[Gray Raxis]

Dark silence, doubtless serenity. That was all Gray had really known since he was sedated back on Roon. It seemed two weeks had past by but for all he was aware of it might have been days or months or years. He had woken briefly during it several times but never long enough to realize or remember what was going on. His body just needed time to recover or feel recovered and his mind needed to come to some terms with things while that happened. He had no dreams at all during this time which was likely a blessing considering how restless he had been since Castamere. He needed the sightless, soundless state he was in with a lack of anything but the calming void.

As much as Gray had needed the sleep he had gotten, his body was finally ready to be active once more. He began to toss and turn in that waking way that only happened when someone is rousing from their slumber. Some noises left his lips as if to herald his awakening. Eyes slowly blinked open to reveal the milky orbs that were once gray within white spheres. The darkness around him did not change however but it did brighten a bit. The sounds of machines beeping and booping at first whispered to his ears but swiftly shifted into a soft roar. The sounds of a body near him in a near inaudibly creaking chair surfaced as well. The air smelt neutral to him. Plastic and metal and cloth and wood. There was not one smell much stronger than the next. Slowly he began to rise up from the bed as his mind attempted to caught up with his body as soon as it could.

[member="Stardust Raxis"]

 

[Stardust Solus Skirae]

[member="Gray Raxis"]

No sooner had she sat she looked over to see him tossing and turning maybe it was a bad dream? No she recognized that anywhere he was waking up. She stayed silent for now, not wishing to shock his system to much. Noise were made as she let a breath out watching him set up as she slowly moved over to him and then carefully spoke

gray can you hear me?

She said in a calm soft voice, she dared not touch him yet as she didn't know how'd he'd even react to her speaking at all, however she was close enough her presence wpuld be no doubt felt by her husband. She started up at him into those milky white eyes as she shivered...she swore she'd find whoever did that to him...and make them suffer the same

your in a bed if you've not noticed, your inside a hospital imside imahalyan, i'm sure you hear the sounds, your hooked up to a IV that is giving you nutrients much needed as your extremely malnourished , your in a private room that is safe...ok?

Slow and steady jist give him the details of where seeing as well he wouldn't see anything

 

[Gray Raxis]

Sounds. Words. Someone was talking to Gray but he didn't know who. They were speaking carefully to him like someone might to an injured animal. His head felt like it was spinning, spinning in a black void. He couldn't focus on the other person's words at all until he got it to stop. A hand went to his head to cover his sightless eyes while the other stayed in his lap. He was sitting up now it seemed. The noises of the machines around him as well as that neutral scent were bothering his head as it shifted from spinning to just hurting. It would seem he had been out for too long and now he was paying for it a bit.

As his mind cleared, Gray heard the tail end of what this person had to say to him. It was Star. He recognized that voice now. Safe room? No private room and something about being safe was what she had said. What did she mean by that? Despite the throbbing of his head, he began to focus on looking out around him using the force. Machines, furniture, Star, and... more. This wasn't a safe room this was a cell. He frowned as he noticed all of it. She was imprisoning him like they had done. Did she know what they had said to him? No, no she couldn't. Maybe what they had said to him was true though and she did remarry for political reasons. That would make sense. She couldn't afford her old husband to be seen walking around alive while she had a new one.

Gray turned his head in the direction he had heard Star's voice come from. " So I'm your prisoner now."

[member="Stardust Raxis"]

 

[Stardust Solus Skirae]

[member="Gray Raxis"]

When he spoke her heart sank a bit, he wasn't her prisoner...she wanted him safe in case whoever had harmed him cane back yet again. She thought for a moment then spoke

no your not and never will be, your in a safe room . This is to ensure whoever harmed you won't be able to get in...

It was the truth part way, it was also so he didn't escape just in case he woke up still like he was before. She sat back down as she looked at him seeing the scar in his eyes and shivered...doc had patients to ten to before he could come in back so it was just them

we needed up finding you on roon in some slave camp...reminded me of the old days just...without you helping

She didn't know exactly what to say...just little at a time

 

[Gray Raxis]

" They won't be coming for me." Gray said to her in a neutral tone of voice. He didn't trust her. He just couldn't. It was impossible for him to trust himself or anyone else right now. They had really done a number to him and he was going to need even more time to come to terms with it. He needed time not asleep. He turned his face away from her. He would have looked at something but he couldn't being blind. All he could do was sit there and remember how he had become this way....

They had tormented him and tortured him for months. They wanted Gray to break. They wanted him to break so they could make him one of them. He didn't know why they and it sounded like there was even some debate amongst them as to why they did as well. They might have succeeded at their plan too if not for the one who freed him. A servant or apprentice or slave of some kind. He didn't know and it didn't matter for long. His saber was returned to him and they were attempting to escape when two of the three discovered them. He killed them both, but his rescuer was run through with a saber first. Then the last one that seemed to be in charge tried to sway him. They failed. Gray killed them as well but it cost him his sight. The pilot who was going to help got him out of wherever it was he was imprisoned at. They went down to pirates over Roon and crashed near the mine. They found an old supply tunnel to the lake. He stayed and the other left to find help. They never returned. Now here he was with someone he didn't even know if he wanted to be around or not right now.

" You have imprisoned me Star. Don't try to fool yourself into thinking you haven't."

[member="Stardust Raxis"]

 

[Stardust Solus Skirae]

[member="Gray Raxis"]

Husbwordss brought some relief, maybe they truely weren't and they didn't have to worry at all now, however she looked to him and frowned...he was troubled clearly and yet she could do nithing as she knew it was not physical rather mental...soemthing she could barely help with at all

Now there he was again, saying she had imprisoned him. She stood and walked to a table then back to him as she looked him over with a sad eye

why do you keep saying That? You not restrained, if you really wanted I could get a doctor in here to take the IV out and you could move around this room freely, hell if you wanted I could take you outside get you some fresh air...whu do you keep saying that?

The ending was a mix of stern but concerned words...

 

[Gray Raxis]

" You could let me out. You could walk with me. You could." Gray said to her with a near sneer on his face by the end. " I'm not free if you are always there. I'm not allowed to do as I please at all. This room is locked up tight isn't it? How is it different than a fancy cell?"

Gray was irritated now. Star was always like this when he got hurt. She would hover around him and give him no space. He wasn't her husband he was her belonging. She must have remarried because what is a Queen without a King? She needed a new, shiny man for others to admire and fawn over. He was here locked away because he was the old trinket that was not worth putting on the mantle but still held sentimental value. How long would it be until she was bored of him? How long would he be imprisoned like this?

Gray was filled with anger and doubt and regret. It was a habit for him after all of those months to feel nothing but those emotions. He wasn't allowed to feel anything but those emotions. He was not overcome by the dark side but the darkness within him had certainly been set free and allowed to grow. The light within him was still there, but it was growing dimmer as his thoughts kept going to the worst places. Reality was not a concern right now for him or the situation at hand. All that mattered now was how these two saw what was going on.

[member="Stardust Raxis"]

 

[Stardust Solus Skirae]

[member="Gray Raxis"]

She moved away, his words hit her and stung worse then any injury she possibly could get, she closed her eyes as she went silent and frowned...she wanted to cry before him right now break down and just tell him what she wanted to say but she couldn't no she couldn't he didn't need it right now....and as she closed her eyes she saw something in the force...his force signature was tainted...that light she knew tarnished...

She didn't know what happened still, she moved closer and pulled a chair up. She was to stubborn to back down yet at all, clearimg her throat she talked again

you've always been free allowed to make your own decisions...what you think when you made the decision to simomy jist up and leave it didn't hurt me frakkimg worrying each night alone?

She stopped herself a a she took a breath in and her signature flowed around like a sea of warm water of calm...

I have no idea what happened to you....i wanna knoe...i wanna know why you are like this....i want to know what happened to my husband and why he's before me like this

She said choking up

 

[Gray Raxis]

" Up and leave? I was kidnapped by them." Gray nearly snapped at her. " It doesn't matter why I'm like this. It won't change what has been done.... By anyone."

Gray went silent after his last words. She was trying to play the devoted wife, but he wasn't so sure she was. She didn't even look for him. If what she said was correct then he was sure all she did was sit around at her house or her palace. Did she think he would just leave on her without saying anything? No, he had just gone with a shipment of WESTAR goods and got ambushed. They didn't even leave a trail behind them it seemed after. Yet here she was acting like he chose to go through what he did for the past few months....

" I'm tired of being a prisoner. Let me leave and I won't bother you or your new husband ever." Gray said in a completely serious tone of voice. He clearly was convinced now that she did remarry in the months he was gone. This wasn't the Gray that Star knew right now but rather all of the doubt and fear and regret he felt acting out. It was all he knew how to feel anymore. He knew it wasn't right and he should try to calm himself but it wasn't possible right now. His emotions that he had been bottling up for years even before the torture were finally free. Her calming aura was just not working on him as his own more negative energy was blocking it out.

[member="Stardust Raxis"]

 

[Stardust Solus Skirae]

[member="Gray Raxis"]

you usually leave a note before you even go...because you know id worry otherwise...

She was just, whatever had been done to gray it...well...it wasn't him anymore. Stardust slumped back, she didn't know what to do to help him any more...she pressed more and more yet when she did she was met by a flurry of emotions from him that hurt her. Standing she slowly moved to the door and opened it fully as she thwn went over to gray holding back her tears and emotions as she spoke

I never remarried gray....i never even planned to remarry...not even when the council tried to force me

Her vouce held the truth, she then looked away, that calming aura shifting to a sea right before a storm. Calm on the surface violent below the water, she teared up as her next words came choked up as she hated saying them

your my husband the only one I want but...if you wish to leave...j..just know that the door to our home is open should you come back...as..as is my heart gray...should you come back...youll have a home wife and kid...just as you left

She stood by the door as she stayed silent her body shaking as she didn't want to break down...no...no she couldn't gray didn't need this at all

the door is open for you to leave...ill guide you on out then after...then after whatever you want

 

[Gray Raxis]

Star spoke. Her words were true but there was no way for Gray to know that. His head had been filled with lies and half truths for months. They had taken things and twisted them around to suit their desires and their designs. It had warped his perspective and his state of mind. He certainly didn't trust his former torments' words or action to any degree but he could not deny some things that were true. She had admitted that there was talk of her remarrying and she had hosted that event to him unknowingly. It was just more fuel for his instability's fire.

" You held a ball to find a new husband." Gray said to her as he just stayed in the bed. " You say they tried to force you to, but we both know that no one can force you to do anything. You can't be forced to do what you don't want to do and you held a ball to find a new husband. You might not have found one but you were looking. I hadn't even been gone for a year and you were already moving on after telling me over and over that I was your one and only. I should have known that was not true even before now. After all of the people you invited into our bed how could I?"

Gray couldn't leave the bed right now. He was stuck full of things attaching him to medical machines. His body was also too weak for him to be able to do much right now after the time in the cave and stuck in bed. She knew this. She knew this and still mocked him by offering him the chance to leave when she knew he couldn't. Was this always what she had done? Had she always been tricking him like this knowing he was foolish and naive enough to believe her? His emotions were overflowing in him. The thoughts most true to his nature were not getting through to him right now. All he could see was the dark and so that was all he could feel. The dark side within him was steadily becoming more potent and Star would be able to feel it.

[member="Stardust Raxis"]

 

[Stardust Solus Skirae]

[member="Gray Raxis"]
She clenched her hands, he didnt know the truth yet here he was spouting out things like she took people to bed. She wanted to scream yell do whatever to get her words through however she stopped...she felt something dark. She closed the doors and walked to gray...that darkness was growing....she frowned as she sat at the edge of the bed...she knew what to do

you don't mean any of that do you...oys not the gray I know speaking...what darkness has been planted in you? Gray...you weren't just on roon were you...please tell me what happened

Her aura started shining again this time moving arou d and trying to touch within him, she realized she couldn't win with just words no...she needed to fight with the force as well quell the darkness within him

 

[Gray Raxis]

" I don't know where I was or where I have been." Gray responded curtly. " I'm blind now to the galaxy and can't see where I'm at anymore.... But I'm not blind to what you are doing. You are trying to be nice to me to get what you want from me. It has always been this way. I can see it now. All of this is because you want something even if I don't know what it is yet what you want. You are just like them in that way. All you do is mess with my head and my emotions while trying to get what you from me. They tried to use pain to break me but you are using pleasure."

Star's soothing wasn't working as Gray's words just became more and more bewildered. It was obvious he was grasping at straws and lashing out at her over something that he would have known wasn't true in a more stable state. He had walled himself tightly up as if he was in a torture chamber rather than a medical one. He just sat there with his hands in vice like fists. A deeply pained look on his face mixed with the great amounts of anger he felt towards those who had done so much to him. There was nowhere for him to direct his anger with his tormentors already dead by his hands, so he seemed to be directing at whoever was around him. He was directing it at Star.

[member="Stardust Raxis"]

 

[Stardust Solus Skirae]

[member="Gray Raxis"]

She got a answer at least, however she frowned at his words. Well yes she wanted soemthing from him she wanted him to be exact, she wanted him back so they could be a family again so their child wpuld have a father and grow up with one. She was being incredibly patient even pushing herself to not explode

your right, I want something from you. I want to be a family again. Now who are they...yoi keep mentioning them...were they the slavers?

She she spoke calmly she gently went around as she started unhooking the machines from him before he was now all unhooked and could moved as he wished, she stopped at the end of the bed feeling his anger that seemed wold and simply just pushed to her. She spoke again

you've such anger in you that even I can't calm...gray I know you think I'm using you but listen to these few words before I go for I must take care of our child. Think on all that has happened...meditate...sort it all out...the door will be open should you want to leave...your free to move and the doctors will help if you need it...and remember...even if you speak like this too me...youve a home here with me...you always will

She began walking away as she held herself together best she could as she sighed quietly

 

[Gray Raxis]

Star was trying to act like she cared still by spouting off lines like she was some kind of Jedi. Who was she to pretend like anger was a bad thing? It certainly was but she had no place to comment on it as if she were above it. Gray had seen her lose her temper many times and charge ahead. Here she was acting like a Jedi when she fought more like a Sith. If she truly knew him like she was claiming she did then she would have known this darkness was inside of him all along. She would know the anger, the fear, and the doubt he fought against every day of his life. She just wanted them to be a family again? If she didn't even know him well enough to realize he had this in him all along then how were they ever a family to begin with?

" Still acting high and mighty. You want us to be a family again? Don't insult me. You are just running off to be with your new husband while you know I'm in no condition to leave. It is easy to say the door is always open when you know your little trinket can't leave." Gray said to her. This certainly didn't sound like him from a few months ago in anyway. It was bitter, angry, and lacked any form of sympathy. He was a playful trickster before who cared for others not this creature of anger and resentment he was right now. " Go play Queen some more with your little subjects. Maybe one day you can join the Sith again? I'm sure you would enjoy looking down on others while you play with them like toys. You certainly are enjoying doing that with me."

[member="Stardust Raxis"]

 

[Stardust Solus Skirae]

[member="Gray Raxis"]

She stopped cold, she was done it was piling up threatening to rip her patience down and it had worked she roughly turned her anger grief and a flood of emotions being felt as far as the next city as she walked over and slammed her hands onto the table nearly cracking it as she spoke her voice filled with these emotions as she spoke

high and mighty?! Yea sure ill show you high and mighty the mask I've been playing while behind it I've torn myself down had sleepless nights worrying!!! No frakking person could replace you yet your to DENSE stuck in this frakking mindset that I'm using you!!!

She stepped closer steaming as she shook and then spoke again grief evident

do you think I didn't feel like vrao when the council forced me to choose forced me to make a decision when the man I loved was out there doing force knows what could be dead dying or even possibly left me so you not think that many nights i couldnt even look at our child without remembering his father and crying because I think that he may grow up fatherless? Along side that having to deal with the first order them giving me a choice which I snapped and nearly became the enemy of my people who I helped?

She moved to the bed gripping the side as she started him down

you say I've a new husband you say that I'm using you but for the forces sake gray if I was using you I wouldn't try to help you even while your attack me because I LOVE YOU MORE THEN LIFE AND WITHOUT YOU I'D BE DONE

She huffed and turned leavimg the room quickly as she left the door open a small crowd gathered as she pushed through them shaking and tears streaming down...thwyd felt their queens grief and now could see it...shw kept moving slowing down as she got far away and rested agaisnt a wall as she sat down curling up

 

[Gray Raxis]

It was pointless for Gray to listen to a single word that was uttered by Star. She was going off on him and trying to make it out as if she was a loving, devoted wife. Where was she when he went missing? She wasn't looking for him. She went looking for a new husband and played politics. What did she do after he had been gone for some time? She was trying to find a new person to share her bed. She was trying to expand the influence of her planet rather than expand a search for him. None of the things she had done were what she was claiming here with her anger exploding out of her like an eruption. How high and mighty she must feel to get to tell him all of the sympathetic things she had to go through while he was being tortured for months without end.

Then she just left. Gray was left alone in the room with no room to respond to her. She got the last word and got to be the one to make the final statement. That was just like her. She exploded and then left a mess behind for someone else to deal with. The doctors eventually came into the room and began to examine his vitals. Something about muscles being weak so easing back into moving then explaining to him how his eyes would never work again even by cybernetics due to the nerves being damaged beyond repair and blah blah blah. Nothing they said to him was very new to him. He was aware of the condition his body was in and them telling it to him as if he didn't was just frustrating him. What he needed was to not be here anymore. He needed to be alone. He needed to be away from all of this mess.

And so that is exactly what Gray got. He demanded they release him and call for a member of the clan. They did this for him. With his vod helping him, he got himself in a better state of right with actual clothes and some boots. He was then taken out to a cabin far from any of the settled places of the planet. He didn't know exactly where it was other than being what he wanted. They never did tell him and he never asked for details. They helped him get settled and left a communicator on a table for him with a chair so he knew exactly where it was. They wished to stay but he wouldn't let them. He needed to do things on his own. He needed to relearn how to be independent. He needed to relearn how to be himself.

As his vod began to leave, the man stopped. Gray heard their voice say in a reverent tone, " Glad you are back with us Alor Gray. You saved me and my brother back in the battle of Castamere. Thank you for that. Just call and we will answer. Family. Honor. Clan." And then the man left. Gray didn't know what to say or what to think. Had he just been thanked for his actions on Castamere instead of blamed as he should have been? He didn't get it but he had time figure it out. He was alone yet again as he had been back on Roon in the mine. This time around however he was going to be able to focus entirely on himself and the darkness that had consumed everything.

[member="Stardust Raxis"]