Clearing the Air [Private]

[Eugen Aker]

Arisa had assumed the position of Grandmaster with strong support from her fellow Masters in the Assembly, but there had been a few others that had expressed doubts about her leadership ability, and the direction she wished to take Silver Jedi moving forward.

She could understand their concerns, one who was a relative newcomer to the Silver Order, a former Republic Jedi who had opted to continue fighting with the GR until the very end.

When she had finally gotten the time, she had started chatting with each one of her critics to begin in order to better understand their views, and perhaps finally alleviate concerns as she was able to put certain misconceptions to rest.

Next on her list came Master Dragonsflame, a long time member of the order. With his veteran status came a lot of clout, so it was especially important to Arisa that they get along with each other.

She invited him directly to her office for the conversation. Since the time she had taken over the Grandmaster's office from Thurion, there had been some remodeling done to the office and atrium, all to leave the space with more of a light and airy aesthetic to make the space all more inviting and accessible. Plants and indoor gardens were now everywhere, and one could hardly move without bumping into some. By now the office was a greenhouse as anything else, teaming with life, reflecting Arisa's Kiribian sensibilities for harmony with nature.

[member="Josh DragonsFlame"]

 

[Josh Dragovalor]

Bloody hell, say one thing in passing and suddenly everyone knows. It was true, he'd spoken of concerns before. He just didn't think it'd get around and he'd get called to meet with the new Silver Grandmaster. Honestly, he was surprised this was even worth her time to her. To be quite frank, he'd been part of the Silvers for bloody forever. They hadn't cared about him before, what changed now? He had wanted to work with other Jedi, why wouldn't he want to? He'd tried to, but it didn't come to fruition. He'd wanted to feel that sense of family that he did when he had been in the Republic's Jedi, before everything went to chit. That was part of why he'd come here, to work with others again... That hadn't really happened. Instead, he'd found himself just as alone as he had been before he came here.

So why all of a sudden, when he mentioned Sorel's situation rubbing him the wrong way, as well as the family thing, to someone else... Did all of a sudden that matter? Things got around, he supposed... He didn't know how, or why, but he didn't plan to lie to the Grandmaster or anything. He had considered packing his bags and going back to running independently, seeing as his work as of late had been about the same as though he was, he would tell her that if she asked.

Granted, this could just lead to consequences for him. By what he remembered of the Republic Jedi, they didn't take very well to people disagreeing with their things... He supposed he could attest personally to what happened when someone operated differently to what the mass of them wanted... After all, it was him who had been pressured to step down as their Grandmaster at one point because he was a peaceful sort of Jedi in an organization that for some reason wanted to invade planets singlehandedly on behalf of the Republic...

He was no Grandmaster now. What that could mean if there were consequences, he did not know. Expulsion, perhaps? Would they try to imprison him? Punish him and his way of life for disagreeing? He lived a simple life outside of this... He had a wife, and a child. Neither of which he wanted involved in his issues if it came to this. If they turned out to be more militiant than he had expected and tried to keep him away from his family... Or even threaten them, if the nuclear option came... He wouldn't show mercy. He was not the Jedi that he had once been, not anymore. The Jedi he had once been had been stepped on, walked all over and ordered around, held hostage by blind loyalty to what he believed in... He was no longer scared of what an organization could do to him, and he would not follow if it was not something he believed in. He held beliefs he would fight for an organization for... But those beliefs he would also fight against that organization for if it came to it.

Of course, that was the distrustful side of him thinking... With his past, you could not blame him for being cautious. The first sign of trouble, Josh was always the first man to expect the worst, and to prepare for it. He was an overthinker, he would plan for just about anything and everything if he could. The moment trouble was in sight, Josh would begin planning... Even for possibilities that seemed nonsensical to some.

But make no mistake about it. Josh wanted this to go well. He wanted this to go peacefully. Odds were, he'd probably just tell the Grandmaster his meaning behind his words, she'd say some generic thing like "We'll take it into consideration" or make some half-hearted justification for why it was that way... And then he would be dismissed and go home. Possibly with a warning not to spread "heresy" or some such again. He didn't know. That was the problem, wasn't it? He. Didn't. Know.

It was crazy, that, when you thought about it. Josh knew so few people amongst the Silvers... Even less now with Matsu Ike, his former Master who he had met in his Republic days, stepping back from her duties a fair among and distancing herself... He was so damn out of the loop. He knew nobody here, and the only person within the order he'd gotten to know besides Matsu was gone soon after. He knew very little about what had been going on, aside from the Sanctum apparently going back to being the Silver Jedi... Separating itself from dark-siders to prove that it had become a truly light-sided Jedi Order once again... And then ousting Sorel for wanting to... Separate from dark-siders? Which, again, rubbed him the wrong way... But when you consider that rapidly changing agendas amongst the organization's key members and head honchos had caused his own ousting, you couldn't blame him for seeing his own plight in Sorel's.

Perhaps it was him saying to Matsu "It's the Republic Jedi all over again", that did it... Why he was here. He'd said it because these circumstances were so similar... Rapidly changing agendas and ways of handling things, trying to force it on folks who didn't agree with the new way? Not to mention how little the interaction between the Jedi was in the Republic Jedi in the days it had gone to... Well, chit. He'd found himself near the end, more or less... Alone. Just as he did here.

He hadn't meant to offend anyone had they heard what he had to say, of course... He just wasn't one to sugarcoat things

But the Jedi Master remained calm as he would step into the chambers of the Silver Grandmaster. He had never met Thurion, he knew Coci very little, and he'd never been into the Grandmaster's chambers before... He had known Sorel only briefly, and while she had left a good impression on him which was part of why her ousting for disagreements in belief so quickly had left a bad taste in his mouth... He had never been called into her office while it was her office, no.

As he walked in though, he did get a good look around, noting that it very much resembled a greenhouse. "Huh... The old Jedi never gave me an office when I was Grandmaster. They must have really been holding out on me on this if you got to have fun playing interior decorator" The Jedi Master would joke with a light, cheeky smile as he would approach, before bowing gracefully.

"It is a pleasure to finally make your acquaintance, Grandmaster. Even if I can't seem to keep up with who the Grandmaster is each week anymore... Comes with being as out of the loop as a hermit" He would greet, though still with the jokes, clearly... Though if she ended up being a cold fish, he'd cut back on them. He couldn't joke around Selena way back when... It was a damned bore. Uptight schutta she was... Though he meant no ham by his jips. He did like to keep the mood light if he could. The Jedi disliked anger and hate and all that right? Keeping positive vibes was the best way to ward that away.

[member="Arisa Yune"]

 

[Eugen Aker]

Master Dragonsflame would arrive at her office at the appointed time, revealing himself to be a man of humor. She felt no malice from him as he spoke the words in jest, so she would smile at his jokes. Running around soldiers for most of her adult life, Arisa herself knew how to take a ribbing and dish it right back out. One needed humor in their lives to keep their sanity in these trying times.

"Likewise," she replied warmly, standing and reaching out to shake hands. "Though I'll let you know that we only cycle through Grandmasters once a month. I think after me we'll be giving some Knights a shot at rotation."

She returned to her seat, and motioned for Dragonsflame to take his before her desk. Her smile faded, as she prepared to dive into some heavy topics that quite honestly left her saddened, involving Sorel Crieff, who she still very much considered a friend.

"So you know why I asked you to come here today. I knew it may have been quite a trip for you to get out here today, so I won't waste your time with small talk. However, before we get into the grilling of me, I will provide you with a little background about myself, and how I came to assume the position of Grandmaster."

"I hail from the Old Republic as one of the last Jedi of the reconstituted Republic Order, not to be confused with the original Jedi Order from where the SJO and NJO split. The Republic Order was an attempt by myself and others to bring the remaining Jedi back in line with our roots. That was, as students of the Force, and guardians of the Republic and all those in need of protection against the Sith and other hostile forces that threatened the peace. As the Republic in my day was embroiled in a war against several groups, including multiple Sith organizations, we recognized the need to provide a strong defense, which sometimes meant acting proactively to eliminate threats before they could arise. Such an example would have been the joint campaign of what was then the Silver Sanctum Coalition and the Galactic Republic against the rising Sith Triumvirate along our borders."

"I like to think that we were making good progress behaving as Jedi should, but unfortunately our efforts came much little too late. The Republic fell, and I immediately left for Voss. With the ideals of the Republic Order in mind, I worked my way up from Padawan to Jedi Master as I completed my training and began instructing others."

She let out a sigh and leaned back into her seat as she finally addressed the topic of Sorel.

"By an emergency vote, I would suddenly find myself in the position of Grandmaster. It's not something I wanted or felt I was ready to do, but there was really no one else willing to step up to the plate. I'd like to make something clear. Sorel was never asked to step down from the position of Grandmaster. Rather she abruptly decided on her own to leave after refusing the counsel of her fellow masters after some hiccups, including Audren, Coci, and Thurion. Some of the policies she enacted during her brief tenure were controversial, to say the least. Maybe she had been acting with the best of intentions but said policies alienated several of our very own members, and almost drove allies into becoming our enemies. These policies also conflicted with her previous actions."

"Simply put, Sorel was out of touch with with the rest of the Order as she attempted to force us to conform to radical ideologies that went against everything the Silver Jedi were about. I hate to say this, as I greatly admired Sorel and the work she did, but her intolerant viewpoints would have led to the demise of the Silver Jedi."

She looked down at the desk away from the eyes of Dragonsflame, spying her own reflection the glass, eyes becoming misty. It pained her greatly to speak ill about Sorel, even if it was the truth. Out of everyone in the Silver Order, there had been no one she had adored as much as Sorel. When Arisa had arrived to Voss broken, Sorel had rekindled her hope. As the Sith and Mandalorians had descended upon the Outer Rim in unprovoked attacks, Sorel had given her a reason to fight. Now on her sudden self-imposed exile, Sorel had broken her heart.

"...that's all I have to share at this time," Arisa said, blinking her eyes clear as they remained locked on the table. "Now feel free to speak your mind, and tell me of your grievances. You have my word of what we speak of will remain between us, which is why I agreed to talk with you in private."

By then, she was able to look at him in the face again, composure regained.

[member="Josh DragonsFlame"]

 

[Josh Dragovalor]

He liked her, he thought. She was polite, but also not amiss to humor. That was an issue many of the Jedi of the old Order had... They were too damn serious, they seemed so damned obsessed with having no emotions and no fun. He couldn't help but chuckle in return to her jips. "Any way I can get into the rotation? I do have experience" Josh would joke, shooting a cheeky grin in return as he would take his seat at her request.

From there, he would listen. Listen as she would explain a great deal of herself, and her background... She had come from the same faction he had, by the sounds of it... Not to mention factions he had likely never heard of, unless he wasn't hearing right... For it was true, Josh had been gone a very long time after he left the Republic's Jedi Order. He didn't want to be involved with the galaxy at large anymore, for the longest time... He had sent himself into exile, deciding to learn and get better, and rest his injured body, his injured mind... And come back far stronger.

Perhaps she had dealt with many of the injustices committed that he had to see... That, he was not sure of. He was a bit confused when she talked of the old Republic, for it was hard to tell what Republic was what nowadays, and if she looked carefully, she might notice some cloud in his eyes as she mentioned these tidbits, as though he were confused and unsure, but unwilling to interrupt her in order to ask, as he did not want to bring her any sort of inconvenience, especially when the business at hand seemed important enough to her to bring him out here and take time out of her own schedule to speak of...

She talked of her position, and how she came to be Grandmaster... And of what happened with Sorel. He would nod his head slowly throughout, indicating that he was listening. Maybe he didn't understand it all, but no doubt he was listening. Finally, she finished and would ask him to speak. Taking a breath and nodding his head one more time, he took a moment to collect his thoughts and consider how to say all this... But in the end, he simply decided to just speak his mind.

"Before I begin... I should mention that these are more... Personal opinions, then formal complaints, which seem to be what my words have been mistaken for. I do not know if they are problems with the Order... Or simply my own judgments. I hope you understand that I am not criticizing the work you do, I gave my personal opinions to another member, and it seems to have gotten around... I will give you my honest opinion, and speak my mind... That is all I can do. I apologize if these don't seem as important... Or as, you know... Dramatic, as you were expecting... But I'll say what comes to mind. They were, admittedly, mostly just comparing similarities to what seemed to be those of this and the old Order, which if you know my history, you'd likely understand why that would bring me discomfort."

He cleared his throat, letting out one more proper exhale to clear his thoughts before speaking.

"I spoke of the lack of what seemed like a family dynamic... To explain, for years as a Jedi, I liked to think of the other members of the Order as sort of a family... Something I never really had. That all went to chit, of course, when things in the Order went to chit. I ended up taking missions alone, primarily, and as everyone seemed to just be after their own selfish desires and agendas... I just never worked with other Jedi anymore, never really saw them unless they wanted me to loan them something or do their dirty work, or some other. I... Admittedly came to the Silvers hoping to find what I once had again. But that hasn't been the case, I've mostly operated alone, operated like I was independent, or by the Force, part of that old Jedi again towards the end. I've attempted to contact headquarters many times, hoping to be assigned new Padawans, or assigned partners for missions, but never heard back. Everyone seemed so damn bloody serious and business-minded, and it reminded me so much of the times that I loathed so.

I swallowed the bitter pill, recruited Padawans from Jedi candidates I happened to pick up on the field and indoctrinate into the Order... Trained them from scratch. Of course, they're still too early in their training to go missioning with me, so I've spent the better part of several years working independently... Which really was no different from what I did before I came here, after I left the Republic."

He couldn't help but give a bittersweet chuckle.

"I apologize, Grandmaster, this probably seems very silly to you. Here I am, a grown man, a Jedi Master, moaning because the amount of interaction I've had with the other members had been next to absolutely nothing in the large span of time I've been here. I'll... Try and be more practical with explaining the other thing I said, I suppose. Suppose when I told the other what I did, I did it from a place of frustration, as these sorts of things pile up with time. In the end, I suppose that in particular is a matter of this simply not being what I had expected. I can take the blame if that all seems silly in turn."

Josh would scratch his head, as he would get to the second topic. Ugh, this one was going to be hairy.

"Aye, the Sorel one... This one's not pretty" He would admit aloud. "I guess, to be blunt... I was the Republic Jedi's Grandmaster, a long time ago. Long story short, I took over because it seemed the Jedi wanted to be something that wasn't what Selena Halcyon wanted us to be, being just a military section... Nothing more then soldiers, foot soldiers, infantry... We literally bloody invaded a planet singlehandedly that wasn't even owned by the Sith, for the love of the Force... Our own Grandmaster led us into war, and not even in defense... In attack. It made me absolutely sick to be there, and I ended up abandoning the battle after a time because I couldn't bring myself to do it any longer.

When I became Grandmaster, I wanted to go back to the way we were supposed to be... But not two weeks in, things changed. The wind changed and so did the wants and beliefs and values of many in the Order. Suddenly they wanted to be this... Warmongering, military branch, planet-attacking force... While I still wanted to be a peacekeeper, wanted to do humanitarian efforts, stop crime rings, stop slavery... And stop the One Sith before it could turn into what it ended up turning into later on in. I even gave them the literal damn keys to the kingdom, a Sith named Krest, I managed to get out of him the location of the One Sith's base world. I gave this information to the Order the moment that I received it... And all they cared about was ousting me because I didn't abide by the new way they wanted to be.

So I ended up being pressured into stepping down. The Republic's Jedi became the way it ended up being before Corvus took over years after... The One Sith became as you know and took Coruscant... And I was left a Jedi without a cause because the moment that I had the rose-tinted goggles removed from my eyes - ones I had worn since my indoctrination at the age of 5 - I refused to follow something with beliefs far from my own... I was done following a creed, a cause.... If I didn't believe in it.

That's why I said what I did about the Sorel thing. You'll have to forgive me if I seem biased towards Sorel... She left a good impression on me when I met her, when she first took her position. Her plight seemed so much like what had happened to me. All I saw was the Order seeming to change with the tide, and beliefs and what you wanted to do changing... And since Sorel didn't comply with what that was to be, she was also pressured and stepped down. That is what I saw.

So I suppose it might be a little easier to see now why that whole thing left a sour taste in my mouth... Made me worry. Made me consider leaving, because... Well, it's like I said. If the Order changes and I no longer believe in what it stands for, I won't fight for it out of blind loyalty anymore. These last few years have done a great deal in showing me that I am not a weapon to be used... A slave to blindly fight for someone else's war. I am a person. I may have dedicated my life to protecting this galaxy, but I'll do it my own way. And stick with the groups that fight that same fight, and do it in what I perceive to be as... Well, the right thing to do. I guess you could call that selfish, but... I can't be at my best if I don't believe in what I'm fighting for. And If I can't be at my best... Why be there at all?

And if the Order's beliefs change on the dime, and aren't kind to those who stick to what was as before... Well, it reminds me a lot of before. I guess that'd explain partly too, why it made me feel uneasy."

He took a moment to catch his breath, having gone on for longer than he had intended, before trying to wrap all of this up quickly.

"Granted... It's hard to really tell what the Order is these days, communication these last few years is so little, I seem to be so out of the loop, it's gotten silly at this point. Sometimes I even forget I'm a part of the Silver Jedi, at least until I hear a little thing here and there on the grapevine, such as what happened with Sorel" Josh would add, letting out a sigh.

"Sorry again if these don't seem like pressing concerns or anything worth talking about. I sincerely do apologize if there's been a misunderstanding and I have wasted your time, Grandmaster. My plights, or well, my opinions on things are primarily just communication and so many things reminding me of times that I'd rather forget and stay away from."

While she had been nice, he still kept his guard up... Part of him still expected he might have to fight his way out. But he hoped it wouldn't come to that. He did want to stay, he did want to keep helping out. But it seemed the things he'd said had been brought to the fore... Now he supposed he'd have to live with that.

He didn't expect this to resolve anything, really. He figured he'd just be dismissed if not worse and be told not to say such things in public again.

[member="Arisa Yune"]

 

[Eugen Aker]

As Dragonflame began to speak, it became quickly evident to Arisa that he had come to the Silver Order with a lot of baggage. It was small wonder that he had been jaded. From an outside perspective, things did seem to be unfolding as he had described with the original Order. This is precisely why she had decided to sit down with him and some other elder Jedi so they would finally get to meet her in the flesh, and see that she wasn't like those other Jedi that had given into malice and corruption.

"There's no trouble," she replied as he finished, shaking her head. "I asked you to speak your mind and that is exactly what you did. There is no shame in that. Many of the things you speak of, I was somewhat aware of them, but at the time I was still just an initiate on Coruscant. You speak of longing for family, and I did too. I know what it's like to be alone. I practically was with a few other Padawan as the last defenders of the Republic. It was sad because the government and the Republic Order at the was finally something we could be proud of. New blood, working to make much-needed reforms, but it all came too late."

She often thought back to those moments. If she had tried a little harder, maybe shifted her tactics here or there, rallied more, maybe she could have made a difference. Just wishful thinking, but she was now applying lessons learned as she now led the Silver Order and Antarian Rangers.

"As you said, you've been away for a while. I think if you poke around for a bit, then you may find things to your liking. We honor the Jedi Code. In everything we do, we try to exercise tolerance, compassion, and understanding. Conflict is inevitable, as this is the way of the universe as differences exist between us all, but we strive to approach issues in an amicable manner when possible - Form Zero. We are building and maintaining a community, a family that we can all lean upon in times of need."

"So I imagine we could sit here and blow hot air all about our interpretations of ancient dogma - though it looks like I'm speaking to the choir - but perhaps you would rather like to see the what we have going on right now? Would you be up for a tour of the campus?"

[member="Josh DragonsFlame"]

 

[Josh Dragovalor]

The first thing he thought was how much he liked this girl. Honestly, if Shmi wasn't beyond compare and he weren't already married, he'd have asked her out to dinner right then and there. But since that was the case, all he could do was admit admiration for her point of view and her personality. He listened as she went on and told a little more about her point of view and about what she considered the Silver Jedi to be in it's current state.

"I just hope we don't change our name again. I'm starting to lose track... Are we a Jedi, or a Sanctum? Why are we even Silver anyway? Why aren't we the Gold Jedi? Or the Platinum Jedi? Did Silver just sound cooler? Because it kind of does" He would admit, starting to laugh a little in turn as he continued to joke around. The fact was, he supposed there was no point anymore in dwelling on the past... Well, except for the reason of learning from it. But learning from it explained his apprehension. Because if you didn't learn from your history, you were doomed to repeat it. And by the Force, he was NOT going to repeat that history again. He'd sooner leave any Jedi factions completely and strike out on his own again then go through that again. But he trusted Arisa, for the time being anyway. At the least... He'd give her a chance. Let's see if the Silvers could be trusted...

At her offer to go on a tour, he smirked in turn before nodding his head. "That would be lovely" He would answer. "I really don't know where anything is here, never got a tour. I don't even think I met anyone when I first signed up... Just kind of signed up via an email and showed up one day and got assigned students via the usual systems. You are literally the first higher up rep for the Silvers I have met in the like, year to several year I've been here, lost track."

Granted, his time in the Temple had really just been spent teaching students. And then he headed home. Never really did go exploring the place.

With that, he shrugged. "Either way... It sounds lovely. Lead the way, Grandmaster. It'd be nice to get a grasp on what's going on as well. Easier to help that way when I'm not running around like a headless chicken" He teased cheekily with a light smile.

[member="Arisa Yune"]