Approved NPC Consortium Infantry Assault Forces

[Tanith Alde]

Name: Consortium Assault Forces
Intent: Fleshing out the Consortium's Ground Forces
Affiliation: Vincente Aulisi, By extension, the Aulisi Consortium
Availability: Common
Quality:C
Type: Assault Infantry
Strength: 100 Men, Dividided into 10 Squads of 10 Men each
Description: They aren't particularly trained, or loyal, but they'res blood thirsty and obedient. They provide the basic security for the Aulisi Consortium, as well as serving as it's essential Attack force. They aren't that well suited for other tasks, and of course their primary motivators are their fear of Vincente, and their lust for cedits. They come armed with Disruptors and Bronzium armor, bringing them up to par with most standard military units. Fear is a fierce motivator and these men know that disappointment will most like spell death for them, and so they fight with an understandable ferocity in turn, survival is such a great motivator



Links: http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/DXR-6_disruptor_rifle
[post='[URL="http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Bronzium_light_battle_armor%27%5D"]http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Bronzium_light_battle_armor'][/URL][/post]
http://starwarsrp.net/topic/76238-mans-reach-and-mans-grasp/

 

[Boethiah]

Under review.

 

[Boethiah]

[member="Vincente Aulisi"]

Please include this portion of the submission. Even if you don't believe you have any need for it, you simply put N/A afterwards instead. That way we're aware that it wasn't a mistake, and you knew the field existed and can be utilized; as it often needs to when requesting gear links.

Links: (Please link all relevant threads here. This can include tech submissions, development threads or previous RP usage.)

As well, what armour do they use exactly? Another thing I'd like to ask is how you justify a quality C unit of 200 men per is able to be fielded by a minor faction criminal syndicate?

 

[Tanith Alde]

[member="Boethiah"]

Oh, the way I had assumed it was meant was that when you made a unit that was how many men you had total, like at all, not per unit

Anyway, editing in the armor links now

 

[Boethiah]

[member="Vincente Aulisi"]

To clarify; availability is how many of these units there are (common being enough to make up a large force, unique to being just one, and rare to being only a handful). Strength would then mean how many men/vehicles make up each unit. So a common availability of 200 men units would come out to thousands. If you just want 200 men then make the availability unique.

I'd also like to bring up a concern regarding the nature of this unit. As I understand your Consortium is heavily influenced by the Zann Consortium which appears in the video game, Empire at War, and because this board respects practically any wiki canon as Chaos canon (with a few exceptions), the Zann Consortium is treated as having existed at some time during the Galactic Civil War. So is your Consortium by any means related to them, from an in-character perspective?

The reason I'm asking is that we need to avoid plagiarism and this unit bears striking resemblance to the mercenary unit description from EaW; almost like a paraphrased version of the unit description. So please rewrite the unit description in your own words. The name itself is fine, however.

Gear: http://starwars.wiki...disruptor_rifle http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Bronzium_light_battle_armor

Please list this under "Links:" instead, please.

 

[Tanith Alde]

[member="Boethiah"]

I had actually hoped Vincente to be some long long descendant of Tyber Zann, and unknowingly be inspired to create the same criminal empire as he once had, anyway going back to fix and edit the post

 

[Boethiah]

[member="Vincente Aulisi"]

That's completely fine. Canon factions are allowed and indeed do exist, we just want to make sure everything is done in ones own image when taking inspiration from canon. That's all.

Let me know when the edits are made, thanks.

 

[Tanith Alde]

[member="Boethiah"]

The edits were made. And to clarify, does this mean I am permitted to just create the faction as the Literal Zann Consortium?

 

[Boethiah]

[member="Vincente Aulisi"]

Yup! The One Sith, Galactic Republic, Techno Union, Hutt Cartel, Black Sun, and many other canon factions have existed or currently exist on the board. I would -- at the very least -- proclaim somewhere in the faction description or info thread (if you have one) that your faction is a new iteration of the old Zann Consortium. That way people know.

Alright, this description is good enough to not be too similar. However; your edits with the gear were a little sloppy. Could you please remove the following?

Gear:

N/A

This link also seems to be broken.

http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Bronzium_light_battle_armor

 

[Tanith Alde]

[member="Boethiah"]

Done and Done, thanks for the help, still terribly new to this site and I'm just starting to figure the way things work properly now

 

[Boethiah]

[member="Vincente Aulisi"]

No problem, dude. We're all new at some point.

Availability: Common Quality:C

Are you still going for common availability? I mean, you can, that's fine, but I'm going to ask for a dev thread if that's the case.

 

[Tanith Alde]

[member="Boethiah"]

I did downsize the unit to 100 rather than two hundread, but if you wish I can do a dev thread, I'd love to flesh out the Consortium further through one

 

[Boethiah]

[member="Vincente Aulisi"]

The strength isn't my concern, ti's the availability. I am going to use a really bad example and don't cite this as a standard of Codex.

Let's say availability was broken down into numbers. 10, 5, 2, 1. Common is 10; let's say that's 10 units available. 10 x 100 = 1,000. So you have 1,000 trained men since quality C is trained. It'd take quite a lot of resources to train and equip those men, resources usually reserved for a professional army. So If that's the case I'd request a dev thread since there isn't much justification here, so you need to make some. A good dev thread for this might be hiring mercenaries, or doing describing the training process, or even as simple as using them in battle to show their capabilities and weaknesses.

Again, the numbers I am using are not any standards actually used in the Codex or on the board, it's just an example I'm giving to explain how I'm judging this. I'd be willing to approve a common available unit like this with quality E, because then I can just imagine your character going to a refugee camp on Nar Shaddaa and tossing credits around saying, "Hey, fight this guy for me." Chances are they won't do everything you ask, and they won't be very effective, but maybe that's not what you want. However; I'd also be equally willing to approve uncommon at quality C because they only have a very basic set of equipment.

Let me know what you decide. If you want common with quality C I'll need a minimum number of 10 posts in your thread.

 

[Tanith Alde]

[member="Boethiah"]

I'll do the dev thread, I already have some ideas since Ryker is desperate for a thread. I'll have him help me write it out and I'll be done with it in a few hours

 

[Boethiah]

[member="Vincente Aulisi"]

Awesome, just tag me when it's done.

 

[Tanith Alde]

[member="Boethiah"]

Added in the dev thread for the Assault Forces but, the thread seems to have turned into an internal squabble so i'm not sure if its applicable. Will start another if you wish

 

[Boethiah]

[member="Vincente Zann"]

The relevance of the content is more important than the story itself. There's nothing wrong with having a struggle, in fact it tends to make development more genuine if everything doesn't go your way.

That all said, this development thread is substantial enough. I will mention for future notice to avoid having very short posts (like less than a full paragraph) because it can look like you're just rushing the thread, and not writing a story, but the fact there's currently 18 and those only counted for a small amount of the overall posts, it's fine.

Approved, pending secondary.

[member="Valiens Nantaris"]

 

[Valiens Nantaris]

Approved.