Private Fancy Seeing You Here

[Korvan Toldreyn]

The Coruscant Jedi Temple | Solenne Abraxas​

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The well-practiced smile faded from Korvan's face as the last of the younglings he had been tutoring made their way from the lecture hall. With a sigh, he watched the door close and turned to cast his gaze out the window - off to the evening sun that hovered near the horizon of Coruscant's skyline. There was a kind of solace that he took in these lessons, in teaching - though as of late he had only continued to question what exactly he was teaching these young pupils. What he was preparing them for. The galaxy was in a tumultuous state, more-so than it had felt before, save for the few weeks and months that had preceded the old Alliance's endgame. Was that same fate what he was setting these students up for?​

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Korvan had yet to take another Padawan, not since Rakaan. In part that was still a reaction to what had happened with his former student. Rakaan might have returned to the Jedi ORder, but it had been his own failings as a teacher which had pushed the boy into the arms of the Empire, and the Jedi Master was still wary that the claws may still be embedded in his old protégé. For now, the council remained satisfied with his efforts to teach the youngest generations - though in truth he expected they were simply pleased to have him busy, to have him not pressing or arguing with them.​

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With another low sigh, Korvan turned and carried himself towards the door. It opened with a hiss before him, and his steps turned out into the grand hallway beyond - filled with all manner of Jedi going about their business. Many made their way to lessons, or passed through on their way to briefings, missions or research of their own. At a glance, it was a memory of his childhood, a place of peace and learning, of safety. But there were the undercurrents of change beneath it all.​

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The flash of armour beneath robes, a lightsaber clipped to a belt a little too overtly, a little too easily accessed. A thought crossed through Korvan's mind, a memory of something Rakaan had asked him - of the militant nature that many in the order were taking. Ever so gradually, with each new skirmish along the Imperial border, with each new piece of propaganda put out, they stepped away from what they were. No longer servants of the light, but knights of the Alliance.​

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Tucking his hands into his robes as he crossed his arms, the Jedi Master cast his gaze away from his fellows with a frown, stepping into a nearby turbolift. The day was not quite done, but there were no more lessons or meetings that Korvan needed to attend to. He could at last take some time to himself, to rest. How long had it been since he simply meditated? Since he simply cleared his head? Tapping the console beside the door, he watched as it closed and turned back around to peer out the glass on the rear of the lift. As it set off towards the meditation chambers, he thought, he wondered.​

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About a great many things.​

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[Solenne Abraxas]

Location: Coruscant Jedi Temple
Tag: Korvan Toldreyn

A gaggle of younglings dashed ahead of her—A little too light of foot to truly be looking where they were going. Any other Master might have gently scolded them for the carelessness of having her foot stepped on, but Solenne merely waved them away with a gentle laugh. It was too beautiful a day for children to waste spending one more moment of it indoors. Gifted or not.

"As I was saying Master Abraxas…", her tour guide for the afternoon continued on, "—Are you planning on formally joining the New Jedi Order on a long-term basis?"

The auburn-haired woman didn't reply right away and merely adjusted the deep blue hood that obscured most of her features. As she hated being lied to Solenne often refused to do it herself. Instead, she relied on the half-truth, the quarter-truth, and implication. Often, people jumped to their own conclusions if she simply let them. This was a matter of trust. She did not know this Master Isol that had been assigned to her, nor, did she have any intention of doing so.

Not when her entry had been treated to an overzealous recruitment pitch.

"I should like to visit with a few colleagues first. But—You may inform the council that they have an extra Guardian at their disposal if they should find use for one."

It was delicate and diplomatic, easy, as the light breeze that pulled through the courtyard. Nothing about Solenne seemed to give the idea that she would ever traverse a battlefield but that was often the way for many Jedi. At least, that was the truth from her experiences. This Galactic Alliance was different than she remembered and also very much the same. Ever and always embroiled neck deep in wars that were either not their own, ill-prepared for, or seemingly never-ending.

On and on the cycle went. One group on top, then the next, and the next—With violence only escalating and crushing all those underfoot. So was the way giants. They had no quarrel with the people and creatures living below the clouds. They simply walked, lumbering along, destroying with every step because they knew no other way. It was simply the nature of things.

Especially, on Coruscant.

Solenne held other thoughts about the New Jedi Order that she would keep to herself for the time being. She wished to observe and come to her own conclusions. Regardless, she graciously thanked the attendant that escorted her in for his time, but his services were unnecessary. Even though the Temple had seen its fair share of remodeling after the Fall she still knew it like the back of her hand. "I promise I'll be fine…The Temple isn't so large."

"If you're sure Master Abaraxas, I—I really do have a lot of work to do…"

"Then don't let me take your time. I feel perfectly acclimated—You've been lovely."

Her guide gaped owlishly at her for a moment before nodding his head, the tips of his overly large ears reddening, before he scuttled off toward the nearest entryway. Solenne chucked good-naturedly and continued on a meandering path. She had, in fact, told the truth. She did have someone to see. The happiness of the little ones free from their studies was a warm glow that lent a delicate smile to the kiss of her mouth. It was nice, to feel children laugh.

Sol eventually ascended a grand staircase that led to Temple proper. There were a lot of different shades and sentiment pressing against her psyche. From childlike wonder, to anxiety, boredom, and even fear. That was normal. As much as the Jedi treated fear as a gateway to the dark it was often normal and harmless. All that mattered was how they adapted and reacted (or didn't react) to such stimuli. An achingly familiar presence caught her attention abruptly.

It was simultaneously a lighthouse in the dark—And a distant strike to the chest.

Her head tilted up and she caught sight of the bottom of a turbo lift. Of course, she'd just missed him. Solenne sighed and waited patiently for the next one. If she thought he wouldn't bolt like a rabbit before a lioness she might have tried to call out to him. For that reason and others, she kept her signature suppressed. It didn't take much more than an educated guess of where he was headed. Troubling times, led to troubled minds, which, in turn, prompted the search for a solution.

Clarity.

The lift came just a few moments later and she stepped inside without hesitation. It took no more than a moment to get to the floor that held the meditation chambers. Stepping free, her eyes were drawn to his back. It was a silhouette against the light that she knew very well, but, that didn't really mean anything. Her hands folded before her and tucked neatly into either long blue sleeve. There were little blue roses hand stitched into the hem. Not many, just one or two.

Solenne wanted to call out to him.

It had been so long.

Instead—She continued forward until she stood at his side. Her head remained bowed just lightly but her gaze never left the entryway to the meditation chambers ahead of them. Perhaps, if Korvan Toldreyn couldn't see her face, he wouldn't rebuke her so handily.

There must be something about it that offended.

"…I almost thought to look for you in the Archives, Kor."

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[Korvan Toldreyn]

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The Coruscant Jedi Temple | Solenne Abraxas​

As the hiss of the turbolift doors behind him sounded, Korvan stepped out and began to proceed down the hallway. As he did, he heard the same hiss again - as presumably, some other Jedi had come to use the chambers. It wasn't long before that same individual came to step up alongside him, and the Jedi Master spared only the briefest glance towards them. The woman's face was hidden, and so he initially offered little in the way of a greeting as she moved in alongside him, slow steps continuing to carry him towards the meditation chambers.

Of course, the sound of her voice brought him instead to a sudden and far from graceful halt. He might have overlooked the sight of her with her head bowed beneath that hood, but Korvan Toldreyn could not ever forget that voice. It did not matter what she said, it never would have mattered, she merely opened her mouth and a shiver ran down his spine, memory crashed through his mind like a starship plummeting through atmosphere.

And with it - a moment of fear.

And regret.

"Solenne!" He did his best not to sound surprised - and failed drastically.

"What are you doing here?" This time he tried not to make it sound accusatory, but it did. "I didn't know you were on Coruscant, or at the temple." What he didn't say told more of a story than what he did. His tone was flat, polite - but with the kind of inflection one might use when they were broaching an apology they didn't want to make. Or, with the kind one would use when they were speaking with an ex. Not that he would have any notion of what that was like, of course.

"It's good to see you." He decided to try saying something that might not have come across as quite so stiff. In truth, he had been utterly caught off guard. Had he felt her presence, had he known she was there - that she was in the temple at all, he might have... Well, he supposed that was why she had hidden it from him.

How long had it been? He had to think. Korvan had not seen Solenne since before he had taken Rakaan in, since the Alliance had been reborn. Since... Ah, yes. Well - they had both needed some time apart from one another after the way things had gone, at least that was what he had determined, what he had decided on behalf of them both. He had not broached such a decision with her, nor had he made any effort in truth to reconnect in the years since.

But that was for the best, wasn't it? It might not have been pleasant, it might not have been exactly what either of them wanted, but it was for the best.

He was sure she'd see it that way.​

 

[Solenne Abraxas]

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Location: Coruscant Jedi Temple
Tag: Korvan Toldreyn

His emotions were muddled.

Solenne took in a steadying breath when everything he felt washed over her in a wave. It wasn't warm—Not like it used to be. It was juvenile of her to expect, for a moment, that any part of him might have been happy to see her. Even if it was a surprise. One hand unthreaded from the other and she reached up to tug down the cerulean blue hood of her robes. Rivers of auburn hair tumbled free and spilled around her shoulders. Doe-like eyes fixed themselves on him, quietly, trying to ascertain his truth.

The Jedi Guardian had to listen carefully when Korvan Toldreyn spoke. The truth he offered was not likely to be the truth she thought she heard. Solenne remained silent for far longer than he would have been comfortable with. When she did speak, it would cut to the heart.

"I can sense your fear. Are you afraid of me, Korvan?"

The way he spoke her name, almost, as if it were a curse. The way he questioned her mere existence, her presence, as if she dared to breathe the same air he did. For years, Solenne had found herself making excuses for him. For his disappearance. For his reticence and the iron curtain he had placed between them at the moment when every confidant she had ever known in her adult life, had died, in the smoldering crater that had been Galactic City. Where was his patience, then?

Where was his kindness? He could spare an ocean for the masses—But not a drop for her.

Not even now.

"How could you know where I was, or, where I've been? Why would that be something you might know when you've never tried to find out unless it was to ensure our paths didn't cross."

Solenne hadn't come to berate him, truly. Even now her words were far from accusatory or angry. They were plain, calm, and simple. The blue-clad woman was simply speaking facts as she knew them to be. He tried to feign niceties and even that fell entirely flat. He couldn't cover up his previous follies with one half-true moment of feigned politeness.

A flicker of something unreadable flashed in hazel orbs for a moment before she briefly shook her head. The expression she wore was a mixture of things both disappointed and full of mistrust. Solenne was not one to lash out, but her tongue could be swift when prompted. "…I came because I heard what happened with your student, because our people are at war, and because I am a Jedi standing in a Jedi Temple.", she began, though, the reasons were left in broad spectrums. They had always worked well together in the past. There was not a problem the Temple had, before the Fall, that they weren't capable of solving. This very odd, distant, and plastic version of Korvan would have difficulty finding himself out of a wet paper bag.

He avoided her like a youngling avoided their studies. Creatively, and with gusto.

"We have much to discuss, you and I."

And discuss it, they would. Until she was satisfied. Solenne was more than capable of protecting herself and had long since grown tired of Korvan calling the shots. She had given him ample time to come to his senses. Her head turned away from him then. Toward the meditation doors. Any point that wouldn't draw her back toward the face she missed, anything, that would keep her from remembering. "I'm tired of being punished. You were…"

He knew what he was.

"And now...You treat me as if I'm your enemy."

Which, in all truth, was fair. If he wanted to go to war during her stay at the Temple?

So be it.

 

[Korvan Toldreyn]

The Coruscant Jedi Temple | Solenne Abraxas​

"I can sense your fear. Are you afraid of me, Korvan?"​

Her words struck him. They were a slap in the face, though undoubtedly not quite as much of a slap in the face as his own reaction to her had been. Coldly would have been generous, his surprise and his off-guardedness had made him greet Solenne in a sense that was almost outwardly hostile. He had approached her arrival not as a reunion with an old friend, not even as a man who had any semblance of compassion for the woman that stood before him.

No, instead he had approached meeting her again with the same hostility and fear that he had faced their last meeting with. She had picked up on it effortlessly, as she had always seemed painfully capable of doing, he was afraid - though not of her. It was a selfish kind of fear, not exactly the same fear he warned and sought to guide Rakaan away from, but it was not entirely different, either.

Her words did not relent, and though he knew there was no true hostility intended from Solenne, he couldn't help but feel the undercurrent of guilt grow with each thing she said. He could have tried to reason such things with her, to explain why he had made such efforts, why he had closed himself off from the woman that had once been his closest friend. However, there would be little gained from such a thing. Even in their youth, Solenne had been among the first that he argued the particulars of the Jedi Code with.

In a sense, she had become the very basis of his arguments.

Drawing his hands from within his robes, he settled a palm on his hip as the other brushed up through his hair - it was longer than when they had last met, undoubtedly it appeared somewhat ragged from his recent stresses. So too was his beard a newer addition - well, hardly a new one, but that was just how long it had been. The smooth-faced and bright-eyed young Jedi Knight she had known had matured, aged into a man who was by all appearances distinctly sage-like.

He appreciated that most people didn't know him well enough to know just how lacking in wisdom he could be.

He appreciated that most people didn't know him like Solenne did.

"I never meant to punish you, Solenne - I..." He trailed off, already certain it was an argument that he would not win. That was a line of thinking better left to what had been said. He could not convince her otherwise in that sense, he could at the very least attempt to salvage some semblance of the greeting as he might have wanted it to come out.

"I am sorry - I hadn't expected to see you, and I have had a great deal on my mind as of late." A miserable excuse, in truth. But there was a truth to it as well. He looked tired. Not even the ravages of the Endgame had seemed to weigh so greatly on his mind - but then again, he had been carrying around far less weight for far less a time, back then. "You're not my enemy, Solenne - you're..." He paused. "...A friend, you always have been."

A friend...

A friend.​

 

[Solenne Abraxas]

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Location: Coruscant Jedi Temple
Tag: Korvan Toldreyn

Confusion, surprise, and a few dancing twilight notes of fear.

Those were the strongest emotions that she could easily discern while Korvan tried to pull himself together. Her remarks, straightforward as they were, seemed to have shattered the legendary composure he was known for. Solenne wondered if even his students had seen him struggle so much. To breathe, to form words. Soft hazel eyes took on shades of greenish blue and pale brown in the warm interior lighting. They observed, critically, and yet with infinite care.

Solenne could not help but note the changes in him. His confidence seemed shaken, that was to be expected. That didn't detract, however, from the fact that time had only done his appearance kind favors. Korvan could hide behind a handsome face, a full beard, and stern idealisms from the rest of the Temple. He could use his presence to seem as if he had all the knowledge in the world. He could hide from his companions, from his students, and perhaps even the Council—But he could not hide from her.

Not then, and not now.

"Then what did you intend?"

She turned to face him fully and the subtle, familiar scent, of vanilla and orange blossom, would move with her. Her footsteps wouldn't make a sound while the hem of azure robes slipped across the polished floor. Luminous eyes found his, scrutinizing, as if they were trying to place the pieces of a puzzle. Brick by brick. They seared through him as if there were no barriers, they could not cross. As if there was nowhere, he might escape.

Not even into himself.

His excuse drew a soft laugh from her. It was like a silver bell—Lighter than air.

"Come, now. Do you mean to tell me that the great Master Toldreyn can be thrown entirely out of sorts by the simple presence of a woman he did not expect?", there was a touch of playfulness to the indictment, but, more than anything it would tell him that he couldn't speak in circles around her. He couldn't dance around the subject; nor would she allow him to try. He claimed her to be a friend and she shook her head slowly… "If these years of silence are how you treat your friends…I shudder to think of how you may regard a true enemy."

The same hand that had come to remove her hood settled in a position between them. Her pointer finger was raised slightly more than the rest. Most would take it as a sign to stop. He would know that she was trying to sort what she felt from him through the Force. Fractured, disorderly, unclear things. Beneath all of his inner turmoil, she could sense other things. Little bits and pieces, flickers, of sentiment he seemed to be swallowing beneath waves of…Guilt?

Her hand pulled back as if something had struck her. What had she seen, felt?

Nuance.

An echo of…

Silence began anew while she processed it—all the while watching him, carefully, with such eyes that would speak volumes. Of the time he had squandered and of the truth he avoided. "I forgive you, Kor. I forgave you long ago. But I have not forgotten burying my dead alone. I have not forgotten trying to rebuild in the wake of the Fall without you. I have not forgotten anything—"

She breathed, somehow, seeming nearer than she'd been a moment before. Solenne hadn't moved in the slightest but the wards that kept her signature bound slowly fell. The divine light that she carried wherever she went fell around him like sunlight. Warm, inviting. It was the reason many seemed to find a fast companion in her. Everything about Solenne seemed designed to draw others in.

"—Despite wishing that I could. Do not apologize unless you fully understand what you ought to be apologizing for. Neither of us acted alone that night. But only one of us made the cowardly choice to turn tail and run away. You are not my friend, Korvan."

"But you're right. I am yours. I will always be, yours."

This was not entirely how she had wanted their reunion to progress. Solenne had expected some level of surprise, but, she had not expected outright hostility with such a poor excuse. He even sounded like had to convince himself that what he was saying was somehow, remotely, true. The sound of the turbo-lift moving caught her attention and her hand moved almost lazily toward it while she pushed it back down. Clearly, sending it the other way.

She was not yet done.

"When did it happen, Kor?", Solenne questioned, though, her voice was barely a whisper. It seemed to echo in the empty hallway as acoustics carried it. She didn't need to yell. "When you decided that your friend didn't need or deserve you any longer? Was it before, or after?"

"When did you start using your heart as a hiding place? I haven't set eyes on you in so many rotations that you might as well be a stranger to me. Yet, you are not. You never will be. I knew you would be coming here because no matter how much time has passed…I know you."

She paused. After so long…Sol had more to say than she knew. Someone needed to tell him that it was all right not to be so strong. To keep pretending. Losing a student was a blow that few recovered from overnight, even if, that student returned. Things had changed. Something had happened. The war with the Empire seemed all but inevitable. He wasn't on his way to the meditation chambers in the middle of a beautiful day to have a cup of tea and a biscuit. "I thought it only fair to let you know that I have made my decision. I'm only sorry, it took me so long to make it. What lays before the Alliance will be challenging, at best. No one knows you as I do. Let me carry your burdens as you once did…"

"Let me help you. Perhaps, then, you might find your clarity."

 

[Korvan Toldreyn]

The Coruscant Jedi Temple | Solenne Abraxas​

Every aspect of what she did - everything she said, the way she looked at him, even the scent that assaulted his nostrils. Korvan was utterly convinced that it was all intended as a weapon, something to be used against him. Of course, it was working. Memory was a hell of a thing, particularly such memories that came with fierce passions, and Korvan had always been weighed on by his guilt far more than he had by anything else in his life. Ever was there something he would regret, some decision or outcome which had left him with the specter of wrongdoing.

Her jests came with that hint of playfulness, that soft air that might have drawn a smile from his face - but he couldn't help but feel a barb behind them all, a sharp prick that ran down his spine as a reminder of what he had done. "You and I grew close - closer than... Closer than we should have." At last, he had found his footing again. At last Korvan was beginning to regain some semblance of the Jedi Master he was, his backbone starting to form itself once more even as she shook him with each and every one of her statements.

"You're right, we both made our choices - after Endgame, it was a moment of weakness... You were dear to me, Solenne, you always have been, and we were lucky to be alive, it still seemed unclear that would remain the case." He spoke as if pardoning them both for some great crime. He might have seen it as such a thing, but he remained all but certain it was not a sentiment she shared - she had never taken those teachings to heart in the way that he had. "But you and I risked growing too attached, too linked... The last thing the Jedi needed were more of their number to fall, and so I needed to step away, for both our sakes."

He remained quite certain it was not a sentiment she would wholly appreciate. Certainly, the way she put her questions indicated as much as she pressed him, a sigh escaping the Jedi Master as he shook his head. Inwardly, he felt as if he might have preferred to be facing down a battalion of Stormtroopers in that moment.

"But I am sorry that I did not reach out sooner, that I did not call on you. It was never anything that you did, it was never because I did not wish to see you, or have you in my life. That was precisely why I did it."

Brushing his hand through his hair once more, he let it trail down to his beard, a finger brushing over his mustache as he watched her intently. She had certainly taken her time to fill him with barbs, intentional or otherwise, honesty was brutal that way. But in time she came to speak of the situation the Alliance was in, beyond their own unresolved business. When at last she came to finish her request, he raised a brow - seeming more surprised than anything.

"I'm alright, Solenne." He lied.

"My student walks these halls again like he should, and the duties I have are many but they are what I signed on for. The Order needs someone who is still trying to find a peaceful resolution to what lays before it, rather than resorting to the beating of war drums." He assured her quietly, as if these statements somehow took the weight off of his own shoulders. In truth this time, he knew it was not that he did not wish for Solenne to be around, not that he did not wish for her aid.

He just didn't particularly feel as if he deserved her concern.​

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[Solenne Abraxas]

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Location: Coruscant Jedi Temple
Tag: Korvan Toldreyn

"Perhaps it was not close enough."

Ah. The holier than thou mantra that had been pounded into his cranium with an axe by the wizened old crones that let Coruscant burn in the first place. Surely, they were excellent fonts of wisdom. These were the same practices that nearly wiped out their Order from the olden days to the present. The hubris, the gall, to assume that they were more than near or human. Little demi-gods that needed not, wanted not, yet they rolled through the galaxy in an unbidden storm. Powerful.

Indomitable. Endless—Champions of Light to sweep away the Dark. They could even surpass death itself if only they gave up that which made them mortal.

Rather than debate, the absolute absurdity of the argument he knew was a losing battle she merely waited for him to finish weaving a tale that might make him feel better about his decisions. Solenne felt him become emboldened by regurgitated dogma, just, as she felt familiar moral superiority rise like a ghost from the ashes. When a break came in the dialogue—She moved. Not to close the distance between them but to swiftly punch him in the shoulder like she might have when they were younglings.

"Idiot."
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The word was equally loving as it was insulting. Rather, he was her idiot. It was to be expected. Solenne had been born of Hapes, after all. He could not be fully blamed for his blindness because in the end—All men were hopelessly ignorant when it came to matters of the heart. Not stupid, really, but just plain senseless. It took something earth-shattering or an anvil to the head to force their eyes open.

Even when the truth sat directly in front of them.

"You don't keep things that are dear to you safe and hidden on a shelf, out of sight, out of mind. Exile has changed nothing save to rob us both of years that could have been better spent. What was done cannot be undone and that link you speak of simply continues to smolder as it pleases… And yet—Here we both stand. Untouched, by the dark."

Solenne was willing to bet that Korvan would have liked to fight an entire army of Stormtroopers at that moment. When they fired at a target? Often, they missed.

She did not.

Korvan would know his mistake long before the words settled in the air between them. The warming aura that slipped through the hall seemed to change direction and it pressed against him for a moment in silent rebuttal. It seemed as though he had forgotten far more than she had over the years. Perhaps, that was the way of men. To forget those who cared for them as easily as the moon rose and fell every evening and morn. "I am not one of your students, nor, am I the Council. Do not lie to me."

Despite the fact that her voice never rose above anything conversational it was a clear warning. Solenne had spent far too long in his presence not to know by the barest breath of a whisper whether the words on his tongue were false or true. She could feel, that some part of him remembered. The broken pieces. The hidden, quiet, fragmented things. Parts of himself that he buried for what he believed to be the greater good. Parts of her—That he thought had been laid rest. It was still there. He didn't hate her—No. It was far more complicated than that, but, so deeply pressed down that it struggled to breathe. It was thunder and lightning in reverse.

She heard it. Then, she saw it. An echo.

Just an echo. It was the only reason she still stood here, still spoke, and bandied words with a man who for all intents and purposes could barely stand to endure the sight of her.

"You can run from me as hard and as long as you like. It won't change what is—You'll only be exhausted on top of it. We make a good team and we both know that nothing is as it seems. I'm not asking for you to break your precious vows. I'm asking you to let me help you."

Solenne wanted…Wished, that there was some way she could make him understand. She could reach for his hand but he would undoubtedly balk at her touch. She could reach for his soul but she would only find an armored door. That was why, if he did not wizen, they would find themselves at odds. When fire met fire, the blaze only burned brighter—And neither of them were made of water.

"I'm asking you for once to tell me truth. Let me in."

 

[Korvan Toldreyn]

The Coruscant Jedi Temple | Solenne Abraxas​

Korvan and Solenne would never agree on a great many things. He had spent much of their youth arguing with her, attempting to warn the woman against the dangers of such connections, of the direction the Order was taking by allowing such things to occur among its adherents. She had never particularly liked listening to his arguments then, and so when she punched him in the shoulder, he was not especially surprised by it. Sadly, Korvan had long ago given up trying to convince anyone save his students of the folly of such things.

As she spoke again, beginning her argument, it was much the same as it had always been between the two of them. However, this time - her argument felt distinctly more personal. She was no longer using the nebulous mention of 'another' when she spoke of such things, she was speaking of the two of them, directly. He felt his shoulders set back, and he made a deliberate effort to lift himself up a little taller, peering down at her as he shook his head. "And who is to say we would be so untouched if we had embraced such things as you say?" She could not know, regardless of how she phrased her argument.

As she spoke again, as the warning entered her voice, he stiffened. His lie had never been malicious, but Solenne had never appreciated any form of a lie. Certainly not one coming from him - and she had trained herself remarkably well to know when he spoke in mis- or half-truths. It was infuriating just how often she could determine that.

But she spoke of his students, and it was in them that memory turned to resolve. Rakaan.

Already, the boy had shown he struggled to police his emotions without a guiding hand. He had over-steered far too often when Korvan was not there to scold him, or to guide him back along the right path. Thus far, he had not taken steps down the path of attachment and romance, but Korvan had his worries...

His suspicions.

More than that, Korvan knew just how much of an example he was to his pupil. Rakaan might no longer have been a Padawan, but their relationship as master and student had never really changed. Indeed, Korvan suspected it was his own chaste attitude, along with his reassurance and teachings burned into the boy's brain which had stopped Rakaan taking the steps down that path. Even if it could have possibly worked for himself as Solenne suggested - though, he still doubted that it could - Korvan knew what that example would do to Rakaan.

No, for him - Solenne would need to be the cautionary tale, not the new example.

Though, beyond that, Korvan knew there was some truth to what Solenne was saying. He was being cruel to her, he had been cruel to her. Regardless of what might have happened between them, she had returned, and trying to avoid it now would only send an entirely different sort of message. A low sigh escaped him, and Korvan brushed his hand over his beard. "I'm sorry, Solenne." He began plainly, quietly, shaking his head as he crossed his arms once more. At the very least, he didn't want to argue this with her any more.

"The situation with the Empire weighs on me, as does a great deal with Rakaan, and the council..."​

 

[Solenne Abraxas]

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Location: Coruscant Jedi Temple
Tag: Korvan Toldreyn

"And who is to say we would be so untouched if we had embraced such things as you say?"

"Me."

The singular statement was issued with a calm confidence that belied the many nights she lay awake, wondering, which one of them was correct. Solenne had come to a final realization about the folly in his philosophy when she felt no whisper to the dark. No call, to take vengeance when she had been slighted. Despite the fact that she stood on the other side of the chasm when it came to his beliefs it still left an impression. To be told over and over that…She was wrong.

To be thought of as a weakness.

To be told that her family, the entire line, was a natural disaster waiting to happen.

If only one of them dared to love too much. Dared, to hold someone close.

"I say it. You left me with many things, including, time…", she breathed while Korvan squared himself to defend against what he assumed would be an onslaught. He was probably right, though, it was clear that he didn't understand. Not in voice, nor, in the way doe-like eyes followed his every move. The way she remained present while he thoughtlessly rubbed salt in an old wound. "I waited for it to come to find me. To punish me as you have—To fall. The Darkness never came. My affection never waned..."

A pause.

"And my faith in the Light stands on solid ground. So, yes. I say it."

Just because he had raised his guard, and locked her away, didn't mean that anything had changed. What was the difference between allowing attachment when the fate of a species demanded it versus a simple choice that two willing individuals might make? Did that Master not feel for his children? For his seven wives? Did those often force-sensitive younglings not feel for their parents? For each other? The lack of attachment, trust, and faith was the very reason so many of their people had been purged in history. People were responsible for themselves and it was the duty of the Jedi Order to nurture healthy minds and hearts so their Padawans might make educated, informed, and mature decisions.

Not to leave them scarred and terrorized of some shadow swallowing their light whole if they dared find comfort in anything but a book. Avoiding worldly attachments would always have a place but it should not be extended to bonds created among one another.

Solenne remained silent, after that.

Not because she had given up but simply because he refused to grasp the depth of what she spoke. There was something within her that she hadn't realized still existed so plainly. Sadness. His apology was met with even more, quiet. Her arms crossed slowly and tucked into the robes of her sleeves as if a chilly breeze had suddenly swept through the hall. The admission of the truth, even generalized, caused her hardened stance to lessen…Carefully. Just a little.

Ever wary because of how easily, how quickly, he chose a lie over the truth.

"I've missed you, Kor."

A final, truth.

Solenne drew in a deep breath and glanced heavenward for a moment before slowly releasing it. That was the truth of this ENTIRE discussion. From the bottom to the top it was the beginning and the end. It made every bit of sense that the situation with the Empire would weigh on him. That, he would worry for his former student. That he would be at odds with the Council. If she knew him half as well as she thought she did all of these things were inevitable. "…You know that old adage…"

"It's always darkest before dawn."

A half-smile touched the kiss of her mouth. Gentler, now, but laced with something achingly distant. As if she had lost something irreplaceable. The rose seemed to have dulled its thorns for the moment if only because he seemed to give her something. Some semblance of anything other than disapproving glances and open avoidance. "Come, then…Let us get a cup of tea and you can tell me all about it."

About the Empire. About his student, and the Council. About the new Alliance.

About… Everything.

"....Things have changed. I've been gone, long enough."

 

[Korvan Toldreyn]

The Coruscant Jedi Temple | Solenne Abraxas​

Ever did she need to get the last word in. That had always been the way with Solenne, no matter how long they would argue, no matter any attempt from his part to end it, no matter which one of them was right, Solenne would always ensure that she had the last word. The small part of him that she had always tried to goad out of him when they were younger shook with the urge to keep the argument going, but he had grown, and his better judgements bit his tongue as he refused to fall to her baiting, not this time at least.

Besides, it was more difficult than he might have liked to admit to focus on arguing with her when she admitted that final truth. A slow sigh left him, as well as the intense weight of guilt that settled once more in his stomach.

Korvan was resolute in what he had told her, in his decision to keep the two of them apart for as long as they had been. Solenne would never agree with him, she would never see the reasons for why it was safer that they stood apart, that we didn't indulge in what she had suggested was there, but he knew the truth to it all. Of course, that didn't mean that any part of it was easy. But that's all that the life of any true Jedi was, sacrifice. Such a positions as he occupied came with that caveat, with that responsibility.

Another sigh escaped him as she smiled at him, as she urged him to join her for a cup of tea. How many times had they done just that? Had they spoken to each other about all of their frustrations, their stresses? It was those exact sort of conversations that had concerned their superiors when they were younger, their length and privacy guaranteed to spark some worry in the masters and tutors that watched over them when they were in their youth.

But she was right, she had been gone long enough. He had kept her well beyond arms length for long enough.

And she was here now, with Solenne he knew that was enough. She was not easily deterred.

"You're right." A soft admission, perhaps even a careful one. Conceding that Solenne was right about anything carried with it a risk, even if it was as mundane as a suggestion for a cup of tea and polite conversation. Keeping his arms crossed over his chest, he stepped towards the turbolift, his gaze turning to settle on her face once more. "I trust you'll still find one of the garden cafe's to your liking?"​

 

[Solenne Abraxas]

​

Location: Coruscant Jedi Temple
Tag: Korvan Toldreyn

She hadn't said it.

The words that echoed in her mind, and heart, had done so since the day he'd turned away. He thought she needed to have the final say but that wasn't entirely correct. To speak plainly would have been little more than a nail to a coffin. She held a set of binding, final words, that Korvan would one day need to endure…But at the moment it would have broken everything she was trying to accomplish.

It had taken more courage to return to the Temple while she knew he was present than she might have needed to face down a Zillo Beast with a toothpick. Sol just couldn't let Korvan know, that. Every rejection she faced in his presence was another blow to the armor she had carefully crafted in his absence. It was made of every good memory she retained, every moment, where a kind word replaced a cruel silence. It was strengthened by the fact that she knew, at least, that her frustrations were not singular.

She was not alone. Regardless of his stance, loss came for him too.

He simply accepted that it was what must be versus being something he chose.

Korvan sighed and her smile became all the more beguiling while she could see his resistance crumbling. It was impossible not to react in some way. No matter how she felt about the years of silence, nor, the ache it left—He could still be so very juvenile. The fact that not everything had changed in her absence was warming. At the final admission that she was indeed correct her nose crinkled in a womanly expression that could only be described as finding him…Endearing. "Finally, we can agree on something."

Teasing, still. Mostly to lighten the mood. But also, to remind Korvan that she had not come to the Temple to torment him. Solenne for all intents and purposes meant every word of what she had spoken but none moreso than the last. She had missed him. More than the desert missed rain—More than he could ever know and more than anyone could possibly imagine. She had not only lost her heart during the Fall—But her dearest friend. It was impossible, to do without both.

At the mention of one of the popular hangouts for the Knights and Padawans she chuckled. It was somewhere he might have taken her when they were young, innocent, and most importantly—Entirely chaste. Perhaps she wasn't the only one that apparently needed the reminder. "That would be…", she trailed off, slowly, falling into step beside him. "Lovely."

"Though I hope you remember which one serves the best tea. I don't want seaweed water."

The young Master made a face as she stepped into the waiting turbolift, aware, that Korvan would likely become as skittish as a young horse. He would need to learn to adjust as she had. They had very different responses to being in proximity to one another. Solenne would need to remind herself every moment to be careful of his idiosyncrasies while he would work himself into a terrified fervor every time her sleeve brushed his. "So…What do you think about this Alliance?"

There was no rule that said they couldn't talk en route, though, walking such familiar paths at his side left her with a sense of déjà vu. As if they'd been in this exact location before. It was possible that they had, but time made the detail of every memory a little blurry. Solenne still remembered the overwhelming theme. Key moments, where she knew, that Korvan meant more to her than he should. More than she would ever mean to him.

She also remembered accepting that friendship was all they would ever have.

Until the Fall.

"I've been hiding from the Council thus far—But I don't know how long that will last. I imagine some of them might be getting quite frustrated trying to track me down for the obligatory 'Join Us' to fight the darkness rhetoric...", she trailed off, mindfully, keeping his pace rather than her own. Solenne was rarely ever in a hurry. Rather than rush through life she preferred to take the time to appreciate and perceive it as it was versus what people imagined it to be. "I've not had the NJO cookies, yet."

Suddenly—Her mood seemed to improve drastically.

"When do I get to meet your former student? This one I've been hearing about—Rakaan?"

Solenne had missed so very, very much. Korvan might not have cared much to hear about her adventures but Sol was a very avid listener. She was two steps from sitting at the café as she had when they were still Knights, sweetly, smiling with her face in her hands and an expression that said: Tell me everything. It was an easy habit to fall back into, with every step, bringing everything back where it belonged. Some form of equilibrium.

This wasn't something to be fixed in a day, but they had to start somewhere.

 

[Korvan Toldreyn]

The Coruscant Jedi Temple | Solenne Abraxas​

As much as Korvan wanted to put up a wall, as much as he wanted to maintain the space between him and as comfortable as that felt, he couldn't help but feel that slight bit of ease settle over him at her teasing. In a sense, it was infuriating just how easily she could manage that. To so many in the order, Korvan was the ever-stoic and ever-watchful paragon of the Jedi Code. He did not bend, and he certainly did not break. He was as immovable as stone, as eternal as the ocean, and as grating as rough sand.

And yet, before her he felt something entirely different. It was the feeling one might have if they stepped out on the ice of a frozen lake, trodding carefully towards the center until, at last, it began to shatter beneath your feet. It was not as though he felt the ice beneath him was going to shatter, as though he was about to plunge into the depths of the icy lake.

Rather, he felt as though he was the ice itself.

Shattered.

He stepped along with her, slipping into the turbolift and tapping onto the console for a moment before he tucked his hands back into his robes, peering out the glass wall on the other side as it began to move. "I am sure we will find somewhere to your exacting standards, Solenne." He intoned softly, a low sigh escaping him at her next question. He was not surprised it had come, it was the question he was certain would be most readily upon her mind, considering just how long she had been gone.

"Truth be told - It feels like it functions better than the one we remembered. The senate is as bogged down with politics as ever, and claims of corruption are rampant, but it feels hard to beat a government based around three sole figures - one of whom was a Sith in hiding." The Jedi Master let out a sigh. It was strange, truth be told - to consider just how similarly the old Alliance's government had been to the new ruling powers of the Empire they now faced. Was that how those titans of the Old Alliance, that triumvirate, had viewed themselves?

Had they ever truly been paragons of peace, of freedom? Of democracy?

Questions he couldn't answer, in truth. But she would form her own opinions in time. If she was planning to stay, she would see the Alliance and this version of the Jedi Order for itself, and he did not plan to sour or paint her perceptions one way or another. Though from the sound of her next question, it seemed she already had some opinions about the Jedi. She was hesitant to be drawn in despite the efforts of the council, and for that he could not blame her. Though - Solenne would undoubtedly find more friends among their ranks than Korvan had.

What would Valery Noble think of her, he wondered.

Ah, but then she asked the million-credit question. Rakaan. A soft chuckle escaped him, and he hummed, glancing over to her. "Perhaps you'll talk some sense into the boy better than I can." Korvan mused, though he knew both Rakaan and Solenne, he knew that the two of them getting together would undoubtedly spell some form of disaster for him. Still, they would inevitably meet, of that Korvan was certain. What would his student think of her? Of their past? Well, he'd endeavored most recently to ensure Rakaan knew mistakes were acceptable, it was mortal to make such things, and Korvan was no more perfect than Rakaan himself was.

Still, he hoped the boy would not take Solenne as an excuse.​

 

[Solenne Abraxas]

​

Location: Coruscant Jedi Temple
Tag: Korvan Toldreyn

"I have faith in you."

Solenne was certain he remembered at least some of the things she preferred. They'd spent enough time lingering around the café, the mess hall, and even the deep gardens that were rife with community allotments for those who wished to try their hand at botany. There were many things about the Temple that brought back a feeling of nostalgia. There was a tree they used to visit, hidden, but with perhaps the largest trunk on the property. It was the perfect place to sit on either side and meditate.

Alone, but together.

When Korvan began to speak of the Alliance the playfulness in her nature simmered down and she temporarily put a lid on it. She asked for his opinion because, despite it all, she held him in high regard. His eyes had always been keen to the things that others missed when it came to their leaders and the practices issued from above. Very, critical. Sometimes too critical—But he was more reliable than anyone else she knew. "I wonder if it actually functions better—"

"—Or if it just looks that way. Perceptions and expectations shift when everything else is on fire."

It wasn't so strange to consider the similarities as it was unnerving. It was said that history tended to repeat itself and Solenne couldn't help but wonder, worry, and hope that wouldn't prove true this time around. A brief flash of the tip of a Super Star Destroyer dropping down into the Archives caused her to tense for a moment. It was a strong memory—Where she could still smell the smoke mixed with sulfuric ichor of Sithspawn.

While the memories Sol wished she could hold on to eternally slipped away, some of the most destructive tended to linger. Vividly. It might have been because she didn't simply witness the Fall—She experienced it as few could. Through the dead, and the dying. Her empathic gifts were incredibly useful when it came to being a dedicated and skilled Jedi Master, but it was definitely a double-edged sword. Training and dedication had taught her how to dampen it…But how did one dampen the deaths of hundreds of thousands?

Solenne shivered in the sunlight. It wasn't cold in the slightest, but it would have been visible.

It was the sound of Korvan chuckling, even lightly, that pulled at the edges of the memory and dashed it away. Like liquid washing away the intensity of watercolor paint. It was splotchy, for a moment, until her thoughts ran clear. His voice an anchor—A sweet smile spread slowly across naturally pale pink lips. "What does he need sense talked into him about, exactly?"

There were a lot of things for young people to find confusion with. Displacement. Especially, when they could move things with their mind. There were occasions when the Master could be too close to the situation and the youngling would never listen to reason, but, if it came from someone else? They were all ears. Solenne had worked with troubled youth in the past, both force-sensitive, and not. Her feet took her forward, through the hall, along the path by muscle memory. "I'd like to help if I can…"

"If that's all right with you."

Solenne didn't ask due to their own past, but out of respect for a fellow Jedi. Some took exception to others attempting to guide their students, past, or present. When the café came into view the auburn-haired woman beamed at Korvan in obvious contentment. "Do you remember when old Master Hahn stuck one of the students to the table for an entire night when they got caught nicking sweets from the cart?"

She could remember trying to get her classmate free for hours, but, to no avail. It wasn't until the sun came up that the Padawan could finally stand. Solenne released a silvery chuckle before heading toward the front of the booth so they might order. Her habits hadn't much changed. Jasmine tea with a soothing honey stick. The sweetness helped after long lectures left sore throats.

Speaking of, she hadn't decided yet whether or not to take up mentoring once more.

"I've been thinking about taking a Padawan but…I'm not sure."

Sol didn't know what held her back, but she had faith in the Force. If it whispered that it wasn't the right time then she was willing to oblige. Part of her just wanted to know what it was like to be more than a passing guide. Though, perhaps she should stay where she excelled. A friendly voice and an easy ear to bend when younglings felt like they couldn't tell their Masters for fear of disappointment or a proper scolding. Solenne usually just talked them into speaking up anyway but gave pointers on how to go about it.

Most Masters looked favorably on a student that tried to correct their own errors—Or simply respected them for their honesty. Her nose wrinkled as she accepted the tea tray from a cheerful attendant behind the counter, but, she immediately turned her frown upside down so that she could smile at the vendor and thank them properly. Once finished, she sighed.

"…I might just be better as a substitute."

 

[Korvan Toldreyn]

The Coruscant Jedi Temple | Solenne Abraxas​

​

A quiet hum left the Jedi Master at her insistence, she had faith - she had always had faith. That was and always would be perhaps the part of her that most truly reflected the teachings of the Jedi. Solenne was endlessly hopeful, even in their darkest hours together he had recalled how she sought to brighten the days of others, to convince them that not all was lost. So long had she had spent throughout their earlier years together counseling him, comforting him. And here he was asking her to do all the same.

She spoke of the Alliance again, and he dipped his head in a nod, sighing. Solenne was not sold on the New Jedi Order, nor the Alliance, and he could not blame her. Korvan had fallen in with it all out of familiarity more than anything. And in the galaxy they lived in today, he struggled to see any real alternative. Empires and the domains of the Sith only continued to expand as they once had, and what bastions of democracy and freedom truly remained in the galaxy? No government was without its flaws, its misgivings.

But was there truly any other choice?

For once, in a rare moment, Korvan was pleased for the topic to shift to Rakaan. Even since he had returned to the fold proper, there was a great deal of worry that Korvan still held for his student. For all that had happened. "For one, he could use a reminder that I am not all he sees me to be, I am sure you could share quite a few humbling stories." Korvan suggested softly, reaching up to run a hand through his hair briefly. There was still a hesitation in him at her offer, a sigh escaping him.

A few long moments of silence.

"I think it would do him well to meet with you, to learn from someone I know might actually put some good in him" The Jedi Master commented with another nod. Korvan found that he meant the words as well, as hesitant as he might have been and as wary as he was of Solenne's return, or indeed of any such influence that his pupil may feel from her, he knew Solenne would strive to help the boy, that she truly would.

His own order was simple, black tea, without milk or sugars. Spartan, traditional. He settled down along with her, humming thoughtfully as she suggested taking a student of her own. "It's far from simple - though, I suspect you've more the temperament for it than I do."​

 

[Solenne Abraxas]

​

Location: Coruscant Jedi Temple
Tag: Korvan Toldreyn

A gentle expression lingered on her features while Korvan seemed to debate something in his own time. Now that the less pleasant business had been shelved, for the time being, she was content to let him work through their conversation in his own time. The silence should have felt uncomfortable considering their earlier dialogue but at the moment it simply felt familiar. Normal, even. As if she hadn't spent the last half-decade spurned by him. Exiled, from his existence.

It was a bittersweet concept to grasp.

She never thought twice about being the ear he needed to put things into perspective. It didn't seem to matter how long they'd been separated. It was an easy, fulfilling habit to fall into, as her nature was designed to help rather than harm. Being the anathema of all believed to be truly wounded her more than words could say. Being able to provide sound counsel on good days and bad was something small that most wouldn't see—Or care to acknowledge. Solenne didn't mind that.

Being there for Korvan and others was as easy as taking a breath. As easy as waking up each morning.

The Jedi Master at her side seemed to understand that she wasn't sure about the New Jedi Order. It wasn't that she found any glaring fault in it. She just remembered the past. Many Jedi that walked the halls now were from the next generation and wouldn't know what it was like to see the Temple fall to ruin. To see Coruscant and half the Core fall into despair.

A good deal of needless suffering still rest glaringly at the feet of the previous governing body.

For their hubris; for their blindness.

Solenne did not intend to work with this Galactic Alliance with her eyes closed and her head buried in the sand. It was ignorant at best; irresponsible, at worst. She shifted the topic to his student for a number of reasons, but, none so obvious as what she had heard. It was unfathomable to her that a youngling raised primarily by Korvan Toldreyn could stand to break the Code in the slightest. Did the darkness not burn in the same fashion as standing too close to the sun?

She carried the tea tray that held both of their orders, two separate glass pots, and set it down at a nearby table. It was far enough from the others to avoid being overhead but close enough that they had easy access to refills. While he spoke of Rakaan she poured his tea first, as she always had, and then her own. It would almost seem as if she had taken some sort of class to do so while artfully holding her sleeve and not spilling a drop. "It's hot.", she intoned, out of habit, having spent a lot of time with initiates and padawan learners.

They were always so eager—even over a cup of hot tea.

"What happened with him, Kor?", Solenne finally asked, eyes fixing on his, though they were laced with compassion for whatever it was he had to say. It was unthinkable to lose one of their own. To see a student, knight or padawan, lost to the darkness was their greatest shame. It didn't just fall on Korvan. It was a burden to be carried by them all. Certainly, the universe was diminished without that light. "As infuriatingly perfect as you seem to be…I doubt that was what drive his path."

Oh, there were such stories she could tell Rakaan that would likely have him howling in laughter or staring at her with utter disbelief. That wasn't necessarily what she'd start with, however. She was a stranger. Just because Korvan trusted her didn't mean that his student would even want to accept the sight of her. Especially, not if she was prying into his recent past.

Her eyebrow did quirk slightly at the notion of her putting some "good" into his student. It was ironic in the best of ways. "I might have the temperament for children, but you have the dedication. You've never shirked your duties. I can't imagine that would begin now."

Solenne picked up her tea and breathed it in for a moment. The subtle scent caused some of the invisible tension in her to loosen and relax. "I've watched over many learners over the years when needed. None were actually my own. For the longest time that seemed to be enough but lately…"

She'd been feeling the urge to choose. To return to Coruscant, the Temple, even, to him. The puzzle pieces that the Force had scattered were slowly righting themselves. Putting color to color and edges where she might fill in the center more easily. She glanced at Korvan over the rim of her teacup and dark lashes dusted over pale cheeks. He was still keeping her at arm's length, though, she could hardly expect more in the moment. Solenne wanted to tell him so many things.

To let it go. To let go of whatever it was that drove his student from his teachings. He didn't say much in that regard, but Solenne knew, it must be lingering in his mind. Questions. What had gone wrong? Was there a moment where he could have changed things? A wrong sentence? A wrong lesson on a wrong day? It was easy to second guess when the unthinkable happened. Were it the old days Solenne would have urged him to listen to the Light. Let it go…So that the darkness didn't cloud his vision.

"I will try and help him, Korvan. I won't lie to him…But I won't sugarcoat things either. Losing your way is about as difficult as it gets. It means that there are questions that he either hasn't asked or isn't getting any answers to. The Dark Side…It calls and lures with nods toward the ends justifying the means. Bad things, perhaps done with good intent. It doesn't let go any easier than a spice addiction."

Did that mean Rakaan might slip? Solenne wasn't sure. But with the right support and open minds...It could be prevented. Sometimes, a student having someone believe in them when they couldn't believe in themselves was all it took. Knowing, that they had a safe place to fall. "Right now...I don't know him. All I know are rumors and scars...But I intend to. It can't hurt to have another friend or an unbiased party to talk to."

She took a sip of her tea, finally, and a grateful smile spread over her features. There wasn't anything a good cup of tea couldn't fix.

 

[Korvan Toldreyn]

​

The Coruscant Jedi Temple | Solenne Abraxas​

Korvan's eyes lingered upon the teapot as she poured his tea. His gaze focused upon the spout as the liquid slowly and smoothly ran from it into his cup. There was a grace with which Solenne treated tea, tender and delicate, with the grace of one well accustomed to the formality of it all. Yet, he couldn't help but chuckle softly as she reminded him of its heat, as though the steam rising from the cups were not enough to inform him. He supposed it was a habit, a subtle nod to her kindness. Always a warning, always a tender touch.

Slowly, Korvan reached out to take the cup, settling it in his palms as he let the warmth seep through it into his hands. It was not cold by any means, but there was a faint degree of comfort in the feeling.

"He had... A mission." The Jedi Master began softly, brushing a thumb along the rim of the cup as he looked away from her briefly, finding it difficult to let his own eyes settle back upon her own directly. He had comforted slightly, enough to be in her presence once more, to welcome her as a friend, but there were some things that were hard to ignore still, some things that he had not yet grown used to the sight of once more. Her eyes were one of them. So bright, so deep. So full of memory.

"He was to infiltrate the Imperial Knights, I was against it, but the Council decided to allow him... He... Lost himself for a while there, I believe." Sighing once more, he lifted his cup to his lips, not caring too much for the heat as he let it pour into his mouth. It burned his tongue slightly, but he did not seem to mind too much as he swallowed it. A slight smile split his lip as she commented on his 'infuriating perfectness', it was the exact kind of thing she might have teased him for when they were younger.

When things were easier.

There were times, brief, silent moments where he considered such times. When Korvan Toldreyn craved for the simplicity of a Padawan learner's life. It was in those times that his mind wandered then, what if he had never been born with Force Sensitivity? What if he had been raised among a family he never had known? Had the chance to live a normal life? Of course, he would have missed much, there were many he would not have met.

Settling the cup back down on the plate, his eyes drifted back up to her, catching a glimpse of her own.

No, that life was not for him. It had never been meant for him. His was the life of a Jedi Master. Korvan's was the lot of one who would teach others, would watch them stumble and fall, and would lift them up with naught but a smile and the encouragement they deserved. His fate was to love a pupil so deeply, and to know that he could do nothing to truly help them in the end, to guide them safely through the dangers they faced. To shun what others among him would hold so dearly.

His reward?

Infinite sadness.

"I would not want you to, in truth. Rakaan deserves a true and steady hand above all else. He has had enough of people lying or keeping truths from him, even those that are unpleasant." His words were utterly honest, entirely aware of what he was potentially giving the woman before him encouragement to do. "I shall tell him he should seek you out, or perhaps I shall simply put you in one another's path. It would do him well, I truly think as much."​

 

[Solenne Abraxas]

​

Location: Coruscant Jedi Temple
Tag: Korvan Toldreyn

Solenne once again kept her peace while watching Korvan seem to mentally distance himself. Whether it was from her or the difficult topic—She was uncertain. It was only because she knew him better than she knew herself that the Hapani noticed when he retreated within himself. “Infiltration missions are always difficult. For everyone. It requires so much thought toward how the opposition thinks. Slipping into their shoes can be…Confusing.”

“The life of an Imperial is likely, unlike anything your student might have experienced before. The Knights are not governed by a moral code, but, by strict military law. They press the idea that the New Jedi Order is full of tyrannical zealots. They build a strong sense of kinship, obey the call to serve, and are expected to perform their duties at any cost. They are indoctrinated shock troops who watch their government destroy and create weapons of mass destruction.

Their minds try to justify the slaughter so that their leaders can be on the right side of things, so they can be on the right side, until that’s the only truth left. The everyday civilian wants to believe that they are safe—That goodness prevails. Rakaan Horne was exposed to the coldest reality of war. Not everything is black and white. Good and bad. Sometimes a soldier is simply doing what he’s told for the betterment of his people. To extinguish that which threatens their way of life…But suddenly, people are screaming. Things are burning. When the smoke clears and they look around reality settles in.

They are the evil.

But, that’s all right. Because the ends justify the means.”

It could easily make a young Knight wonder about their place. About their methods. Flirting with the notion of violence being channeled and used for what they perceive to be good.

The mild-mannered woman stopped speaking for a moment while she watched the man across from her partake of the still-too-warm beverage and her lips pursed for a moment. Of course, he would down it like a shot while it was scalding. Solenne reached for the small carafe that held the plain tea he so adored and once again filled his cup with patient diligence. Their dynamic had changed. It had been a rarity that they had taken seats so far from one another in their younger years. Elbow to elbow was more like it. Thick as proverbial thieves while they shared notes from class, a snack, or musings that they wouldn’t dream of telling anyone else.

He caught her eyes for a moment, perhaps, for the first time since they’d left the Temple proper.

For a brief moment, it felt almost like it used to be. Where he knew what she might say before it even left her tongue. She missed, that.

His aura changed for a moment and Solenne could follow the deep blue hues he left behind. Hearing him so clearly, in the moment, she knew of the infinite sadness that pulled down on the tip of his heart. It was a weight that would never lessen. “I will be what he needs, then, when he needs it.”

A quiet promise that she would do her best to help both Korvan and his all-too-grown ward. Solenne chuckled at the thought of her oldest friend arranging a playdate for her and continued to sip lightly on the honey-infused tea while turning the situation over and over in her mind. “I wouldn’t come on too strong. Perhaps, introduce me as the friend I am. Not a therapist.”

“The last thing he needs is to feel like you can’t trust him.”

Even if that was the case.

Solenne touched the tip of her tea with her pointer finger and the liquid-cooled just enough for her to drain the rest of it. Passing Korvan a brilliant, sweet smile, she stood up and collected the tea tray. “Come on then. I know what we need.”, the winsome woman intoned, though, she gave no indication on what she might have been talking about. There was one place in the gardens that always made them feel as if the world was tilting just so on its axis.

The tree with the largest trunk. Orange blossoms fell from it and it bordered the edge of the property. It was so quiet—So peaceful. It was the best place to meditate. Not some stuffy room.

Though…He might guess. It was their spot, after all.

 

[Korvan Toldreyn]

The Coruscant Jedi Temple | Solenne Abraxas​

Solenne always had a way with sage wisdom. It was, in truth, infuriating in the kind of way he was sure his own advice bothered his pupil. Rakaan had ever been so very frustrated by any argument that Korvan had made, any guidance the Jedi Master had given him. For as much as Rakaan wanted to push an argument in one direction, he had always struggled against Korvan's own infallible walls of logic and reason.

That was exactly how Solenne made Korvan feel. He supposed there always had to be a bigger fish.

"He took to it all, far too much." The Jedi Master admitted plainly, sighing as he watched his friend. "The boy was sucked in more-so than he ever should have, and I knew that he would be. Rakaan has ever been passionate, abrasive, impressionable and stubborn." Korvan quieted himself. He had been clenching his fingers into a near-fist for a moment, and so he sighed and laid them out flat on the table. He closed his eyes for a moment, trying to steady himself. It was not that he was angry with his student, Korvan could never have truly been upset with the boy. But his worries got the better of him sometimes, his frustrations.

"He was never the right choice for such a mission - I told the council as much, and they pushed my concerns aside."

No doubt, they believed him too biased.

He was ready to continue, to ramble on as he often would, but Solenne moved to stand and collected the tea tray before he could say or do anything more. His gaze turned up to her with a raised brow, confusion momentarily evident on his face before he nodded and moved to follow after her. It was not long before he realised exactly where they were going.

It brought a mix of emotions to mind. Of course, it was a place of pleasant memories, it was a place they had always been able to relax, to forget about their troubles for a while. But it had also been a place that had drawn them closer, too close... Yet, he said nothing, he didn't protest as he followed along after Solenne - for once, he would listen to her, he could owe her that much, at least.

 

[Solenne Abraxas]

​

Location: Coruscant Jedi Temple
Tag: Korvan Toldreyn

Solenne listened and nodded her head slowly when Korvan came to similar conclusions. Similar. But, not the same. He seemed to think that the mission was doomed for his student from the start and the azure-clad woman couldn't help but disagree. There was always a choice. There was always more than one path available to them. Rakaan Horne could have passed through the assignment without any difficulty whatsoever—But that was a pipe dream.

Every covert agent struggled. Each and every one. Unless, they had no heart to speak of.

"…I can also remember a man that was passionate, stubborn, abrasive, and impressionable who turned out just fine. Perhaps, you've met him?"

A timeless beauty touched upturned lips with her tongue-in-cheek humor. Solenne, it could be said, pulled few punches when it came to the defense of their students. It was clear to her that Korvan was a little too close to the subject. The way he moved. Breathed. The way his hand clenched and frustration rippled from him in repetitive waves. She knew that expression. She knew the scent, the flavor, of what it was that Korvan had yet to say. "He might have been the right choice. But, doubt…"

"It can be sensed. He also might have been right for it, though, the timing might have been wrong."

They could spend all afternoon pouring over what could or should have been. What might have been? When the sun began to set, they would find themselves in the same place they began. It was no way to move forward. Blue-green orbs shimmered with infinite understanding while her fellow Master spoke of his attempts to convince the Council of his thoughts. Hopefully, he'd addressed them more pragmatically than he had just spoken to her—But diplomacy with authority within the Temple had never been his strong suit.

Solenne might have listened to his rambling, but that, opened a door he wanted to keep closed. He already criticized the way she watched him…But it couldn't be helped. Did a dehydrated and starving man in the desert not covet food and water? Often, she felt that. It was a sharp pain coupled with soft memories that struck the center of her being. Her care for Korvan was so very infinite that she forgave him in moments. Seconds. Not because his apology was ever so moving or because she sensed some hope for the future. It was simply because it was the way it was meant to be.

When she stood, he seemed startled. Hazel orbs watched him for a moment. Uncertain. Was Korvan becoming content? His anxiety had lessened but…Quickly, she dismissed the thought.

He would never be content in her presence.

Solenne returned the tea tray with a delicate smile and fell into step beside her childhood friend. A floral scent teased her nose and she breathed in the fresh air deeply. It felt good to be outside. It felt doubly good to be…Close to Korvan. Even when they were still at such a great distance. Sol could stand being in his shadow. That was acceptable—She just couldn't abide exile.

That was a line she would never again allow Korvan to cross whether he knew it or not.

She should have never permitted it in the first place.

Robes of a blue sky pulled across green grass with all the elegance of the sky sliding across the horizon. Solenne looked much the same as she had before. Her hair was longer and her eyes were filled with even deeper oceans, but, her bearing and carriage had grown with her wisdom. Her confidence was not the broken thing it had once been in his initial absence. She had reconciled both of their failings.

In that regard—She didn't hide the destination. When they arrived, however, it was not what she'd expected to see. The great tree that they had so carefully treasured had either been blown away in one of many attacks or destroyed. A soft sound escaped her lips, unbidden. It was not a cry nor a scream. Just a sound. There wasn't anything left but a stump. "…I suppose I couldn't have expected everything to stay the same…", her voice carried through the empty expanse.

There was an unearthly sadness to it.

Full and wide as an ocean that was barely held behind a breaking dam. Had he known it was gone?

Had Korvan even thought to check?

Her lips quirked to the side while she seemed to consider her options. Briefly, she hunted in the grass for something. A seed from another tree nearby. Solenne held it warmly in her hands and poured a little bit of herself into it. A steady stream of life. She could feel it crack open in her palms and eventually knelt down before the stump to press her hands against it.

A soft glow emitted from her core. Barely there, but there was an invisible wind moving her hair and clothing that showed something metaphysical was at play. The Force. Moving, twisting, and weaving to obey her silent commands. The seed she held disappeared into the stump and she raised her left hand toward him. "Kor…Help me?", the soft request was distracted. Distant.

Focused entirely on bringing back what was lost.