For Queen and Country

[Garza]

C O M M E N O R
Chasin City

Standing in my Military-esk gear, I had a couple of the local police force of Chasin City standing in front of me. As well as the Starport manager. Thalia was on Kinta Satvas. The ship had been used for Cerberus Enterprise, the company that I had inherited from my master Nickolas. What got me to crack a very small smirk under my face mask, was the fact that the papers I had to allow me into the city were not considered valid. Yes, they were more than a Galactic standard year old, however, all the information on it was valid. The only thing on there that was preventing me from moving onward and into the city, was I had no portrait of my face on the documents.

I never had images of my face.

I was a mercenary who had killed people for a living. I had killed Jedi, Sith, and all else alike. I came from a planet where my kind could be easily identified, much like the Epicanthix. In fact, our species were a lot a like. However, that was not a pressing matter.

Walking over to the police, I raised my hands to show that I was not intending a fight. My voice speaking easily through the mask to them.

"If there is a problem with my documentation, then I recommend we take a trip to the Iron Empire and speak to them about why their sent diplomat was barred from entering the city."
"We have no doubt you are from the Iron Empire sir. The problem is that we need to validate that you are actually here to visit the city, and not cause any trouble."

Lowering my hands, I stated it clearly, and very much intending to follow up on it if necessary.

"If I wanted problems, then I wouldn't be standing here waiting for you to finish your schoolyard debate. I came to see Lady Kay. In fact, you can escort me to her, if it makes your little head feel any safer."

The police officer just looked at me. His attention was firmly stuck between my left metallic arm, and my eyes. Trying to gather what he could about me, and why I was so upfront, yet confrontational without being an ass. Well, I was an ass, more so I seemed to have the presence of authority that he couldn't deny.

​"We will escort you to the capitol to see Lady Kay. If she does not approve, or condone you to be here, then we will return you to your ship, where you will be free to leave."
"That's all I ask officer. Now please, lead the way."

Taking a moment to close all of the documentation, he handed it to me. Opening my wallet, I slipped the information into the folds of the accessory, and replaced it in my pocket.

Following after the man, I felt almost naked as I walked through the streets towards a speeder that I would be joining him in. As I sat in the seat, I felt sad that I had to leave my sword back on the ship. However, it wasn't uncommon as a member of the Empire to carry some form of a weapon. With me I carried only my lightsaber that was hidden within my upper vest area. The lightsaber was very simple in design and was meant for situations such as this where I would have to be void of visible weaponry.

However, I still had the force, and my left arm had to be classified as a weapon within the Iron Empire Database.

Coming up on the palace that would be housing the Lady, I was ushered up the main steps and into the main lobby. Where the officer informed the staff that I was here to meet with Lady Kay. Asking me to stay here and wait, I did so with a nod to confirm what the man had said.

And now, we wait.

[member="Lady Kay"],

 

[Kay-Larr]

Kay had just finished lunch in one of the small dining halls, more or less on her own with the exception of her guards, when one of her staff approached and whispered, informing her of the arrival of [member="Atheus"] . She wiped the corners of her mouth with her napkin and picked up her datapad.

The Iron Empire. Their region of space was far from Commenor's, but not too far. Like some of her other allies, they had a large military presence. For an ally, that was usefull. For an enemy, not so much. And they seemed to not be too kindly to Force users, especially the Dark ones. Kay was used to that. She has hidden her Force abilities from most. And despite the urging of her Master and [member="Connor Harrison"] , she had no intentions of flaunting her abilities to everyone. There was too much at stake. She had to play it out smart and strategize.

With her datapad in hand, Kay got up from the table and left the dining hall to visit her chambers first. Inside she fitted contacts on her eyes, to hide the yellow speckles within them. She took in a deep breath and centered herself, using her focus to shrink her Force signature down to a small tree nut. With some minor adjustments done to her hair, she was ready to greet her guest.

The lobby in which Atheus was waiting in was quaint and showed some of the old architectural style of Commenori's past. Kay had no desire to upgrade it yet.

A pair of her guards came in before her, the door opened seconds before she stepped in. Kay had developed a bit of a phobia with the opening of doors, so she tried to be sure that most doors within the Palace were left open. Things that she wished to remain hidden were never in the public areas of the Palace.

She offered a polite smile and bowed her head as she greeted him. "Good afternoon. To what do I owe the honour of this visit?"

 

[Garza]

Waiting within the foyer, I looked around. The older style of artwork reminded me of the Kings quarters on Hora. Specifically Makrosia. The King Akhilleus was a man who trusted me to keep our people safe. Even more so that I was someone who had seen the best, and the worst of the Hellyni people. I was someone who would not be so easily sway to let our planet, and our people fade. Seeing the Queen of Commenor walk out from the door, Her frame much smaller than my own, as well as her face. Features that could only show experience beyond her years. She had a gift for her line of work. Yes, I had heard about the President's title had become Queen after her disappearance. To come here without any knowledge of the last few years would be stupid.

As the woman entered, I bowed my head. Enough to show respect, and to show that I was a guest. However, I did not trust her as of this moment. I was here to find out more. She too, bowed her head, and posed the question I knew would come up. However, There was no honor I held. She had no honor from me, for I carried none myself.

Returning to my upright self from the bow, I spoke.

"I come for myself, and with the blessing of the Iron Empire. We seek to learn more than simple documents or rumors of your exploits since becoming President, and now Queen."

I took a step towards her. Opening one hand indicating towards her. Flipping my head to the side to get a few strands of hair out of my face, I continued to speak towards her. Formal in every sense.

"My lord seeks allies, in a time when none are concrete. I also seek them. However, Trust runs both ways. As such, I come to determine if you are a woman who holds to her word, or one who believes that words stand for naught."

[member="Lady Kay"]

 

[Kay-Larr]

[member="Atheus"] came for himself as well as for the Iron Empire? Hmm...Interesting. And he had come to question on her on her rise in power. He wouldn't be the first, as of late. If it keeps up, she'll have to do something about it. Or she could hope that people would stop snooping. If only the Elders weren't so secretive, this would have been easier.

Kay raised a brow as he took a step towards her, opening his hand. She remained where she was, keeping her posture relaxed even though she kept a close eye on his movements.

"I have always kept my word. Others may have lied around me, but I do not. I value honesty as I do loyalty and honour. I have never betrayed an ally, nor do I stab others in the back. I may be a politician and play the game, but I do it the right way."

She walked over to a sofa by one of the windows and sat herself down, folding her hands on top of her lap. "Now would you be so kind as to introduce yourself? Then I'll be happy to answer any questions that you may have."

 

[Garza]

"Thank you for your response."

Tis was all I could say after she had responded to my question without me ever introducing myself to her. She was quite the woman to accept this. Hiding something though. She seemed a little defensive. Saying what I wanted to hear, but not all that I needed. How was this so? Words that are definite, and absolute. Never is one such of these words. No person is innocent of a lie. Everyone has done so. I had my doubts, and that was why I was here.

"I have no real name. I am called by many things. Atheus is what I choose to be named."

Standing in front of her, I motioned around us,

"I wish no intrusion. May we sit, as this will take some time?"

I had questions, and I am sure she had some of her own. Not sure if this was going to be the sort of proceedings that went with the game of 20 questions, or if we would just swap answering and questioning one another. Either way, I knew that we were going to learn a lot.

[member="Lady Kay"]

 

[Kay-Larr]

Kay nodded, gesturing for [member="Atheus"] to join her on the sofa before she folded her hands back on her lap. It was odd that he had no real name. Perhaps he was just unaware of his family history. She knew some of her own, but not really a whole lot.

"I'll have some tea brought in. That is if you like tea, of course. I could have something else brought in if you don't." He was her guest afterall. Kay had to look after him.

"So tell me about the Iron Empire. What interests do they have in this corner of the Galaxy that they could use our support for? Keep in mind, we are a neutral planet and I hope that we maintain that designation for as long as possible. Our economy did not do very well while we were under the control of the Sith. But I'm doing my best to rebuild it to what it should be and what it has been in the past."

She spoke the truth in every word. There was no easier book to read than her face. So rather than lie when others would, Kay would often use misdirection instead. But at the moment, she had very little to hide from him. Only her Force sensitivity.

So far.

 

[Garza]

The offer of sitting upon the couch with her was okay. Moving around the coffee table in front of it, I sat on the other side to still provide space between us, but sat close enough to show that I did have interest for being here. As the offer for tea came, I smiled beneath my mask. I am sure that she would not be very trusting of me since I wore a mask over my face. It was as though I were hiding something, and in all truths, there was one lie. I hid my face, but to hide who I was. Hellyni could be easily identified much like Epicanthix. They could be seen and spotted out of a crowd. This is mostly due to their very thick and long styles of hair, as well as almost every one of them carrying a lightsaber of some kind.

I also hid myself from the galaxy. I was once a mercenary. Working for whoever would pay me. I killed a lot of people in my past. I was also an apprentice to a Sith Lord who was rather well known for his Fire Shaping, and his mastery over Sith Alchemy. Now I have taken his place. Either way, I couldn't even trust myself. So why would this lady trust me?

"Thank you for the offer. However, I would abstain from drinking for now."

The woman then began to question me about the Iron Empire and why we came to a single planet government, as well as the neutrality of their ways after being liberated from the One Sith from their fall. Even as she spoke this, I could feel that these words were true. Empathy through the force allowed me to feast on the emotions of others. Yet there was something hidden from me. Something she was trying to keep away from me. I could feel something strange about her. As for what it was, I had no clue.

"You have every right to care for your people. That is not I am looking for. The Iron Empire was formed after the Fall of the One Sith of military officers, and force sensitives who did not agree with the Order, left and formed their own empire. We do not really believe in either side to be the strongest. Nor do we discriminate between Darksided, or Lightsided. However, we are no friend of the Sith Order for their various ways in twisting the world as they see fit."

I shifted in my seat slightly to face her a little more. Just to bring my silver eyes resting at her own.

"I joined them as it was one place I have found that people don't care about your past, so long as you have moved on from it, and aim to aid the empire's growth. As for why I am here to speak to you, We also want neutrality with various nations. We do not seek to overthrow governments, or topple people. We seek to live in peace away from those who aim to take control of the entire galaxy."

[member="Lady Kay"],

 

[Kay-Larr]

Kay nodded as [member="Atheus"] refused a drink. He wouldn't be the first. Many had declined for fear of being poisoned or drugged. But such acts were far beneath her. Neither did she wish to accidently fall prey to it herself. And to be a proper host, she refrained from having any tea brought up for herself. For now anyways.

At the mention of the Sith Order, she lowered her gaze slightly to Atheus' chin. She had heard rumour that her Master had taken up the mantle to be in charge of that organization. If that were true then it gave her causes to be both relieved as well as worried. For one, it would give her continued freedom to do whatever she wished as he was far too busy to pay any attention. But it could also mean that one day, he could come and try to get Commenor to fly their banner and live under their rule. That was something that she didn't want to happen.

As he turned more towards her, it pulled Kay out of her thoughts and she brought her gaze back up to meet his.

"It is never a bad thing, to find a place where you feel you belong..." Kay felt it on Commenor. But not in the Palace. There was somewhere else, but she couldn't remember where. It must be one of those memories that she had lost. Hopefully some day she'd remember. "You said that the Iron Empire is formed mostly by military personnel that only want to live in peace with others. So are you saying that they have all retired and are now living a civilian life?"

 

[Garza]

The woman was slightly aloof for a second after speak words of finding a place she belonged. I knew that face. She felt at home, but not completely. That has happened to me many times. Hora was my home, but I never felt at home. The Empire was fine, and fit for a place to be, but there were still cracks not filled. There was still a void left from the various places I had been. My life prevented me from staying in one place for too long. Thus, I moved about, but still held my ground within those two places. They were the closest thing I had to a family, or kinship. Including Thalia who I had taken under my wing as an apprentice.

I stayed silent as she voiced a question of the empire. How most of us came from military backgrounds. I smiled lightly under my mask.

"Once a soldier, always a soldier Ma'am. As much as I would like to convey that we are just humble civilians, we in fact are not. The Empire aims to protect itself, and anyone within their boarders. Yes, some have taking a moment to step back from the front of live war, however, there still looms the Sith who wish to expand. They attack the Silver Jedi, and aim to take back the planets that were once their sacred homes."

Reaching to my back, I slid out a datapad that had been kept in a sleeve at the small of my back. Taking it out, I flipped through a few items before presenting it towards the woman.

"We have a standing Military should the need arise. What you see are the various structures of our government. Mostly consisting of the Iron Navy, and Legion. The Navy is building up as most of the equipment once owned by the One Sith has been taken, or we have lost the ability to continue building those ships. Thus we build. The Iron Legion holds our force sensitive academy upon Ilum. Once owned by the Jedi for their crystals, we too are there for that resource."

Why share information about what are ranks are like? Trust runs both ways. I needed to gain her trust. If that meant showing the Iron Legion to her, and showing that we are not wanting a war, we never wanted that to begin with. We prepare for the worst, so that we need not worry when it comes. Should she continue to look through the files, she would find information about the two. Mostly basic ideals, and just what they are. I wasn't going to spill everything to her. As a politician, she could have leverage over the Iron Empire if she was caught, and forced to speak of what she knew. However, in her position, and how she seemed a little fearful of something, I doubt that would happen all too soon.

"To be frank, I will never be able to live a silent life. I grew up in very poor situations. The only way for me to go is up. If that means becoming a soldier, or a mercenary, than so be it. Much like the Iron Empire, we seek to expand, and gain allies for the sake of protection. We are so far from all the other major players within the galaxy, it would be... simpleminded of us to seek war."

After that rather lengthy explanation, I decided I would lower myself a little. I was nervous. In a place where if I made a single move towards her, it would be disastrous. Leaving a very simple question, that could be quite complicated for the answer.

"Knowing this much, what do you think of the Empire?"

[member="Lady Kay"]

 

[Kay-Larr]

Kay furrowed her brows as [member="Atheus"] mentioned the Sith attacking Silvers territory to take back their sacred homes. Was Commenor such a place? Sure there were a few temples, but most were newer constructions. Was this why her Master chose her to be forced under his wing? Not to make her stronger but to broaden their territory? She didn't like that idea.

She took hold of the datapad that was offered. "Thank you." Her attention was drawn to both on what he was saying, as well as the information that was there. They lost the ability to build some ships? Well that was something that she could rectify.

Her eyes lifted from the screen to Atheus as he spoke of himself. Like her, he couldn't live a silent life. Whereas his was in the arena of battle, hers was in the arena of politics. And it wasn't as though she didn't try to get out of it. She did. But the Force had other plans, taking away her chances of ever getting bored.

"The Iron Empire is very similar to Commenor. We protect ourselves and those within, without searching for war. You are welcome to open an Embassy here, if you wish. However....I should note that we have Embassies here with a few Sith worlds, among others. They keep to our laws and don't cause trouble. And so long as they keep to that, those personnel would be under our protection. The same would be extended to you, of course."

Once more she looked down to the datapad before handing it back. "I don't play favourites among them. However, I am willing to bend that rule a little if I need to and provide you with ships at a discount once our factories are up and running." She had other offers as well if she needed to. That was just one incentive. No need to put everything out there just yet.

 

[Garza]

She wanted no war. The people of Commenor wanted their own peace. Much like the Iron Empire, we wanted our own land. A place we could live, and thrive without the constant threat of war, or having to cover our tracks out of fear. Should we need to, we can, and with the utmost ability to do so. The problem was that other major galactic players would want in with us, or us with them. Soon we would find war. It was our job to prepare for it.

Seeing Lady Kay agree with this, made me feel a little more inclined to work more with her. However, I still felt there was something hidden from me. As for what it was, I had no clue. Only time will tell. However, what got me to widen my eyes a little, was that the woman was still harboring Sith allies within her influence. Why were they still here if she didn't want War? If she knew we did not agree with sith, Why would she reach out to us then? It puzzled me, yet filled me with a desire to know more. Nodding my head, and letting her finish, I spoke.

"Commenor is your place to make the rules. We will follow them. I will be a voice of concern as the Iron Empire recently took out a Sith outpost on Ilum, and as such, are still hunting down the remaining people from that incursion. Some escaped. Our blood runs hot at the moment. So any interactions on this planet between the Sith and those within the Empire will be strained, and dangerous."

As she looked over the tablet, I continued.

"I have no problem with Sith personally. They want their own lives. However, many of the Iron Empire lost much from those who were with the Sith, and wish them brought to any form of justice. To prevent any further interactions, I would ask that should we build an embassy, that it be away from the Sith to prevent as much as I can. And that should interactions take place between the two factions, you, as a people of Commenor, would judge being an unbiased third party."

All points were valid, and what I would consider necessary to prevent any form of breaking the neutrality of the planet, and her people. As much as I was more worried about my own people, I understood that Lady Kay also had her own people to protect. Should we look out for each other, then we would be stronger alone, and even more so together. Closing my mouth as she then spoke about ships, and being able to help provide was generous, however, would be breaking neutrality in the eyes of the sith. As such, I voiced my concern.

"I thank you for the offer. Do tell how you think the Sith would feel if they found out you were supporting us more than them? Or vise versa? You want neutrality, then I speak out of concern for your people to not throw yourself with one side or the other unless being able to completely support one or the other. I do not question you, I merely act as the voice of concern."

Thalia's voice came into my head. Sparking up about how every day I was becoming more of a leader, and moving on from my vagabond, and lone wolf style. While I may act that way, I was a teady bear. Cold, and harsh, yet holding a heart, and an ear close to the ground for those around me. In all honesty, she was correct. I cared greatly about Thalia. I also held people in regard and allowed them to go as they please. However, should you try and change my view upon something, I would not back down. It was a constant mental battle with me.

"I find that many times, bending leads to permanent fixation, and even breaking."

[member="Lady Kay"],

 

[Kay-Larr]

So some Sith had escaped the incursion on Ilum? As far as Kay was aware, there were no Sith hiding out on Commenor that had fought against the Iron Empire. At least, not to her knowledge, anyways. "I am unsure of whether or not the Sith that hold their Embassies here were involved or even have been involved in any conflict with the Iron Empire. But I could be mistaken..." Not that she wanted to be. But if their hatred of Sith started to make them blind, it could be very dangerous to both her people, and of course to herself. "I can understand a grudge, but keep in mind, there has never been an issue raised between any of the Embassies here. Everyone keeps to themselves. There are even a couple of military outposts here. You are free to choose the location for your Embassy that will suit you. It can either be a location that already has a building, or you may construct a new one." She offered the same to almost everyone.

[member="Atheus"] spoke with a certain kind of wisdom that she lacked in her own circle of Ministers. Governments that had people like that were lucky ones. Kay had an advisor, but her Master saw to it that they would be kept apart. She hated him for that and for everything else that he took away from her.

Kay brought herself out of her thoughts and gave him a polite smile. "You are right and I thank you for your insight."

Just at the mention of 'breaking' however, caused her to revert back into her thoughts again. Some people referred to her as being broken. But she wasn't. Not to her, anyways. She wasn't someone that needed fixing. Being broken was someone that was mindless and had no spirit. Kay was none of those things, or at least she wasn't when her Master wasn't around. She kept her emotions and thoughts well hidden when he was around.

After a moment of silence, she gave him an apologetic smile. "I'm sorry. I lose myself in my thoughts sometimes. But please understand that I would very much like the Iron Empire to become an ally to the Commenori. I would hate for some of our other Embassies to be a deal breaker."

 

[Garza]

The woman's words were clear. She knew what happened here. To hear that there were no previous bad accidents or incidents made me slack my stature a little. I knew our own people could be wild if given the chance, or allowed to. In order to keep them in line, it was like walking a pet. Keeping a tight hold of the leash, and having it taunt and under control. As sad as that analogy was, it was completely true. Commenor seemed to be doing well already. So I don't believe we will have too much of a problem there. I simply nodded with her response. Letting it go for now as there might be other things of higher importance. Considering how she thanked me for my words of wisdom, I had a feeling she wanted to side with the Iron Empire, but for the sake of her people, could not do so.

I took this to heart, and understood why. Both nations of people who wanted to simply live in peace. Yet we were also tasked with trying to defend ourselves. Like minded people should work together to be a better force to fight against. In all honesty, I knew that the Iron Empire would play the big brother role to try and protect Commenor, and I would do my best to limit how much of this role they can play. I knew how it felt to have people out trying to get your people to join a cause you don't believe in. My thoughts briefly slid to my interactions with the Silver Jedi and Hora.

However, as the woman seemed to phase out of the real world, I let her for a moment. I didn't know what she was thinking, but I could feel the emotions from her. Deep and rooted with.. pain? Fear? It was not true pain in this instance. It wasn't true fear. More so concern or the feeling of having to protect oneself. Almost as though the woman felt like she needed to defend when she didn't need to. Something was up. As the woman apologized for her misadventure. I waved my hand as though it were nothing.

"Wonder among you own mind brings trouble or enlightenment. I hope that its the latter."

Looking the woman over she did seem a little troubled. I caught hints of things that seemed to worry her, but without knowing what she was worried about. Being a man who had to hunt down, and even run away from various kinds of people, you learned fast on how to read people's faces, how they acted, and in my case, learned force empathy to understand what they were feeling to stay one or even five steps ahead. I forgot about the formal meeting we were having, and pushed a different agenda.

"Lady Kay, I do not wish to overstep my boundaries, but you seem troubled with something. I know that look and feeling anywhere. So, as a guest, and as a possible ally, Is there anything I can do to help? Anything at all?"

She seemed different from what I had heard of her. Stories of how the woman had been very strong in her standings, and even charismatic to many walks of life. She would seem to carry herself hightly. Yet she almost looked slumped back and aloof from the conversation, and more importantly herself.

There was something wrong in the mind, and in the heart.

[member="Lady Kay"]

 

[Kay-Larr]

Kay had to chuckle softly to hersef at his mention of bringing trouble. It was an inside joke with herself, for outside of her Doctor, she didn't confide in anyone else. But trouble always found her, even if she wasn't looking for it. And no matter how much she hid, powerful Force users tended to find her too. Usually they brought trouble with them. There were plenty of times in which she wished they would all just go away and leave her in peace. But no matter how hard she tried, that was never meant to be.

[member="Atheus"] was studying her, trying to read her in that moment of silence. She could see it in his eyes. Perhaps he knew more about her than she realized. Was he one of those 'friends' that she couldn't remember? No. There was no other record of them communicating at all, that she could find. So this was just concern on his part.

His request to help her only solidified the fact that she wasn't as composed as she would have liked. That wasn't a good sign. Not for her, anyways.

Kay's eyes dropped down to her fingers. As much as she wanted to just shrug it all off as though it was nothing, she justcouldn't compel herself to do so this time. "I'm suffer--no, I'm going through a bit of post traumatic stress disorder. I'm not sure if you're aware, but I was kidnapped recently and held for months. Every moment of it was torture and my doctor is working on healing the scars." She looked up to him then, quite possibly to read his reaction. "I guess you could say that my need to protect Commenor is derived from that. I don't want any of my people to fall prey to what I had to endure."

 

[Garza]

She knew I was watching her with careful eyes. In all honesty, It wasn't on purpose. It was habit. Much like walking past a person, my eyes flickered down to their waist for any weapons they may have holstered, then their hands for any immediate threats such as a weapon or a balled fist, then their eyes. Eyes were the window to the soul. Eyes were the focus of someone's attention. Where they looking at me with a look that could only lead to bloodshed, or were they not even worrying about me and going about their day?

The same was with people I actually met. However, I focused more on the eyes, and allowed my control of the force aid me in feeling their emotions. As much as many Jedi may not want to admit, they had emotions. Love, peace, jealousy, fear, concern. Yet I found that the Sith had a lot of the same. Love, fear, jealousy, hate, or even resentment. It all depended on the person. Others like myself found a healthy mix of it all. Never having a boundary between what was allowed with the Jedi, or the complete release of emotions like the Sith.

Lady Kay was no different. Even as she mentioned the slightest hint of PTSD, I myself closed my eyes for a moment and could see the faces of all of the many people I had killed. Men, women, children. Even soldiers who had no face I could see. Their faces burned in me. Nightmares of their deaths played in my head as I slept. I snapped back as the woman continued with her capture and was finally able to come back to her people. She didn't want them to feel pain. She didn't want them to go through what she had.

I completely understood. Among my own people of Hora, leaving the planet made you considered low among those who lived on the planet. My kind did not trust outsiders. In fact, some were killed for suspicion of being terrorists. They were scared, and running with the tail between their legs. Soon, I will return and aid them. Until then, I worked to further factions, and causes that I believed were vital to keep the galaxy alive. Commenor was one such already.

Lady Kay's eyes reached my own. Her glossy eyes were clearly pained now. She was more than hurt. And she was just now trying to learn to deal with it. Looking down at my own metallic arm, I reached up and grabbed the back of my head. Rubbing it back and forth just where the base of my skull connects to my neck. I needed trust from this woman. The mask prevented that. My eyes and my hiding prevented that. Sometimes I had to release my identity. With the same hand at the back of my head, I pressed my fingers together and began to take off the mask. Taking the straps off, and removed it from the front of my face.

As soon as I did so, I rolled my neck slightly and then looked at the woman with my complete face. Scruffy from refusal to completely shave, but kept it trimmed. My right hand came up and rubbed my face a second to get feeling into it as I looked at Lady Kay.

"I know how you feel. Nightmares, flashes of what happened. Even seeing the faces of people when your eyes are closed. Any soldier who has seen combat can relate. You cut yourself at suffer. You want to believe that this could get better. In truth, it could. My own form of this has lasted me years. Since childhood. If you need a break from these formal talks to gather yourself, I do not mind waiting."

Never, push someone who is close to someone on the edge. The edge was worse than being backed into a wall. Fighting with your back to the wall could allow you support should you get bashed in the head. The wall allowed you to have some kind of support. The wall was a sign of hitting rock bottom, and the only way forward to was to fight through it all. The edge was a completely different matter. The Edge was close to mentally losing it. The edge was where if you fell, you were taking one last shot in spite of those who pushed you, or you reach up, grab them for everything they are, and drag them to hell with you. I knew that feeling. As though the rage from someone even attempting to do that would make me fly into a fury of fists, and strikes with any kind of weapon I could grab a hold of.

This woman was the same. She was slowly backing up to the edge. She knew she was getting closer. She could feel it. She wanted to fight back and come back from this to be able to build a wall for others to find support from. I valued her strength to do this. She was strong. Something was helping her. I needed to help if we were going to have her, and her people, as an ally.

"Lady Kay, I told you my name was Atheus. In the truth, it is. I took the name to forget a past that I hate speaking of. I have been where you are. I don't want you to fall down the same path I had. If you would like help, from people who know what you are going through, I am willing to help."

[member="Lady Kay"]

 

[Kay-Larr]

She wasn't sure what [member="Atheus"] was doing as he rubbed his neck. Kay had a habit of doing that when she was nervous. Not lately though. She had a lot of make-up there hiding the scars that riddled her neck, and scratching or rubbing it would reveal what she wanted to keep hidden. They would disappear soon enough, once her treatments were finished.

It took just a moment for her to realize just what he was doing. He removed his mask. That alone was a bold move. How many others did he show himself to? Probably not many. The underlaying pain was more visable now than it had been when he wore it.

She fidgeted with her fingernails while he spoke of nightmares and flashbacks. The former has yet to happen, but the latter surely has. Her doctor warned her that if she didn't open up, it would consume her and make her insane. Another 'friend' so to speak, told her the same thing, that her control over it was just a lie to herself and to others and that if she didn't confront it, then she'd be overwhelmed. But this was so much worse than talking about the death of her husband. She hated feeling vulnerable and giving people information that they could use against her. Past experiences that she could remember have proven that it never goes well.

But he was giving her a chance. A chance to collect herself, a chance to break from the formalities that the negotiations demanded. And he offered her help. She was no soldier, so it made little sense that they could relate through experiences. Did she have any guilt? No. Regret? Oh yes. If only she could have foregone maintaining her secret when she was attacked and used the tools given to her to save herself. And yet there was no guarantee that that would have even worked. Her Master had much more experience in combat than she had.

"I could use some tea....Excuse me." It was her vice, the one thing that always brought her comfort. She got up from the sofa and went to the door, opening it a little to inform one of the guards to have some brought in. Kay knew it would only take minutes. During times like these she liked to make it herself. There was almost a ritual to it. But her doctor wanted her to do as little as possible, much to her annoyance.

The words of Atheus, Tesla and Lykos echoed in her mind, all of them wanting to help her deal with her captivity. But of the three, only Atheus wasn't aware of what she was. It was a potential dealbreaker. But he had shown her his trust. She had to do the same.

Instead of returning to her seat, Kay stood in the middle of the room. She reached up and started to remove the contacts from her eyes. While she did so, she released the hold on her Force signature and allowed it to grow. Once finished, she looked to him with her yellow speckled eyes. "This....is the result of my captivity." And now she waited, waited to be attacked, or for him to storm out, or to politely inform her that there would be no alliance before walking out.

But at least her tea would be there for her in the end.

 

[Garza]

The woman was surprised as I removed my mask. I could see it in her eyes. Even that much, showed that I was willing to take a step towards the light. She accepted this, and was debating herself over what she should tell me. She took a moment to gather herself, and stood up. Telling me that she would like some tea. At first when she had asked, I assumed it was just as a pleasantry, Now I see its almost a crutch for her. Something to calm her. Something to keep her mind, and heart at the same beat. She was not used to the feeling of being alone. The feeling of having your mind betray your own thoughts. I had dealt with this since childhood. I had had myself to trust. My own birth mother didn't care for me. I lived on my own.

As she stood there at the door, asking for her tea, I allowed it. I had told her if she needed a break, she could take one. I am a darwinist. A man who believes that evolution causes change in the galaxy. That the strong survive however they can. Through brute strength, tactical awareness, or even manipulation of the mind. It may seem weird for me to allow this woman a reprieve of weakness, but I knew she was not so. She was a strong and powerful individual, only confused and scared.

I hated that.

I was once scared and confused about the Galaxy. It was only by the help of my mentor that I was able to become strong enough. If I could return the favor by paying it forward, then so be it. Standing up as she moved away from me as a sign of respect, I stayed standing as she stood there. Stopping, I was confused. It was when I could see her reaching up to her eyes, I could slowly feel the force expanding around me. It was then I could feel the woman's force signature.

She was strong. I could feel the force flow through her. She knew how to handle herself. However, among all the light, and the power that she held, there was darkness. Not at the core, but like an infection. Persisting even when one may not want it. She had felt the dark side, and was scared of it. During her torture sessions, she felt deep emotions that she couldn't understand. Even from the distance between us, I could see the yellow specks in her eyes peeking out. Wanting to conform and become her eye.

She held herself down. Her head was low as though she were afraid of what I feel of her. As though she would think I would leave. I smirked as I walked over to her. Tilting my head slightly so I could look at her eyes. I wanted to see her. I wanted to show her that just because someone was dark, did not mean that they were evil.

"Lady Kay. I am not a role model for anyone. In the hiding of yourself, you fail to see others."

Normally I would let my signature within the force just sit there. If they didn't feel it, then they didn't have to. But I wanted to show her that I was not born of the light. I let my force flow out from myself and towards her. I wanted her to feel the darkness that I had. I have killed people. I consumed the emotions of others to strengthen myself. I used the fear and pain of my enemies to become a being of pure and raw power. Yet, I also had light. I had a soft spot for those who I considered friends and allies. I may be rather young compared to many with my rank within the force, yet I seemed to hold a hidden wisdom not seen by most.

"Not everyone can be a Jedi, yet they do not want to be called a Sith as though it were a curse. I am good at the jobs given to me. However, what I do is not for the feint of heart. You are not alone."

After that moment of exposing myself, I took a step back from her. She trusted me with much. In return, I allowed myself to be exposed. In that moment, I could hear in my ear the activation of my com unit. Through it, the voice of Thalia.

"What's going on? I feel the force flaring out from you, as well as someone else. Are you-"
"I am fine. Just... talking with someone who has the same problem I do."

I didn't hear anything else from my interruption against my apprentice. She understood what I meant. And would leave me be. As I had spoke to Thalia, I looked to Lady Kay. I didn't want her to fear the force. I didn't want her to fear what she had become. I wanted her to accept it, and learn how to ease the confusion within her soul. I could think of only one way to do this. And it was worth a shot.

"I ah... I am fine with the process of our countries working together. I hold no qualms of an embassy, or potentially aiding you and you us in return. What I have a fear of, is you. You are lost in the dark without a light. I would.... I would like to help you find your way through."

I hated this. The only reason I had an apprentice now was because her father needed someone to teach her. Her father hired me. During that time we grew closer from a simple mentor and student relationship to an almost brother-sister relationship. I feared that by offering Lady Kay this chance, that my biased opinion would throw me off of the positions where I stood with the Iron Empire, as well as the people of Commenor. Would Lady Kay side more heavily with the Iron Empire because they are willing to aid her, and show her that no every side of the darkness is evil? Or would she deny it, and hide from it like the Jedi did in the past?

I feared the answer.

[member="Lady Kay"],

 

[Kay-Larr]

Kay swallowed as [member="Atheus"] approached. She braced for whatever was to come, yet the only outcomes that she could think of were the bad ones. As he looked down at her to meet her eyes, she held his gaze, although it was a struggle to keep them there. Eyes were the windows to the soul and she didn't want people to look too deeply. Secrets were always the ace up her sleeve.

Her eyes closed for a moment as he let her feel the influence of the Force around him. It was dark, more so than she had expected. But then his life was far different than her own. She wasn't raised in royalty or politics, but had been involved in it for half of her life. He had done more in his younger life than she had and those experiences seemed to have affected him in the same manner as it had affected her.

She opened her eyes once he began to speak once more. There was no doubt that what Atheus had done in his life was far worse than what her Master had made her do in his dungeon. And to the Elders. Before her captivity, she had never killed in cold blood. Only in self defence. The deaths on her hands were not in self defence at all. They were murder, plain and simple. But murder with a purpose. She had to keep reminding herself of that so that she could feel a little bit better.

She was not alone? Did he go through the same tortures as she did? Did he endure as much pain, both physical and otherwise? Did he have losses of memories and people? It was possible of course.

Atheus stepped away. She cast her eyes elsewhere as he spoke to someone else through his comm. Maybe she was taking too much of his time. It was hard for her to say without hearing the other half of the conversation. A problem? Yes, she had one. Well many problems, but the basic one was post traumatic stress. Her doctor was working with her to try to alleviate it, as well as helping her to heal from her scars and other injuries that she was unable to do on her own.

He returned to their conversation. She breathed a sigh of relief that her Force Sensitivity wasn't a dealbreaker. But then what Atheus said next caused her jaw to drop ever so slightly. He was afraid of her? Kay lowered her gaze to his chest, not really staring at it but just looking straight ahead. A few others had told her that if she didn't gain control that she would lose it, snap, go insane, all of the above. Perhaps that was what he saw in her as well. He saw the demons within her that she did her best not to confront most of the time. There were moments when she didn't even acknowledge that they were there.

"How're you going to help me? Especially if you're afraid?"

 

[Garza]

She was worried.

I could see it in her eyes as she looked down. As though, I were treating her like a peasant, or an outcast to be thrown into the wilds. She knew I was afraid of her. I said so myself, yet she thought I was actually afraid of her. In truth, I feared not what she is, but what could happen if she didn't learn how to cope correctly. I went on a rampage of death, and destruction, and murder for the sake of fighting. Just because if filled me with a temporary pain that could smother my internal pain for a few moments. I tried everything. Drinking, hunting of animals, people, but when I realized it was all for nothing, I had to find a different answer to my pain.

I knew this, and she didn't. She was mostly of the light. Slowly being tainted by the darkness. Almost as though she were a cup of water, and the taint were dye slowly dripping into the water. Turning her into something she did not like, nor want.

"There is an old saying among my people. Don't feed your Ghost. This ghost is called many things, but known by all as the Hunger Ghost. It feeds on temporary relief, and fears. Feed it, and it become stronger. So much so, that it becomes uncontrollable."

She asked how I could help her if I feared her. She didn't understand what I feared.

"Yet, you can't leave this ghost alone. You have to feed it. Get too close, and it will eat all it can. Yet you can be so far away that it grows impatient and begins to attack yourself. So you feel it with long spoons. You control how much you feed it."

Thalia started to talk into my ear again. Wanting to keep the Com open so she could hear. Shaking my head, I reached up into my ear and removed the bud. Letting it drop to the floor, I spoke to it.

"Thalia, rest in, and go do something else."

Proceeding to hold my foot over it, and then adjust my weight to crush the little bug. Reaching down to pick it up, I then stuffed it in my pocket. As much as I trusted this woman with my stories, and life experiences, I didn't want her men to pick up the ear piece from the trash and somehow decode our encrypted network. I trusted her, but not everybody that worked under her.

"Lady Kay. I do not fear you. Huh, I could never fear anyone who I can see into. What I fear, is the actions you could take, or the consequences you could possibly face by trying to hide from what has happened to you. To conceal what has become of you, will only fester like an infected wound."

I smiled painfully as I looked towards the woman. She was as old, or older than myself. Yet was lost within the same room I was in. Bumping against anything and everything to try and get a bearing of what was happening. If she had doctors aiding her, then they were not the right people for her. They wouldn't understand the pain she was going through. They wouldn't understand the confusion that resided within her heart, and mind. I knew this like the back of my hand. I could feel it even without using empathy now.

"You do not have to accept any of the word I speak. You do not have to speak to me ever again. But I still extend my hand to help. I know the pain of torture, and of loss. I have gone through years of trying to correct my mistakes. Trying to find acceptance along a road that I am alone on."

"I don't want that to happen to someone else."

[member="Lady Kay"]

 

[Kay-Larr]

Kay listened to the tales of the Hunger Ghosts. The words rang true to her. She had seen her own. There was not one, but two of them in her mind, skulking in the shadows, both wanting to fight her as well as those that would try to rid her of them. They were a part of her now. The question was, would they always be?

Her train of thought was shifted as [member="Atheus"] spoke to...Thalia, was it? But no sooner had he done so, then he removed the comm from his ear and crushed it with his foot. He was allowing privacy, something that she favoured above all else right now. Privacy allowed her to share and keep her secrets at the same time. It was welcomed.

His remarks on fearing the actions that she could take if she didn't confront her own demons was something that she had heard before. A few others had told her the very same thing and she was allowing them to help her in little ways, holding not much hope that one sole person could help her through it all. People had a habit of leaving, so it was always handy to have back ups. It was smart in it's own way.

Atheus smiled to her then and the concern in his eyes was evident. He was reaching out in every which way that he could, yet willing to accept her refusal. That was a tactic that she used, trying to prepare for all outcomes. "Alright, Atheus. I will accept your help....But first I need my tea."

A knock at the door indicated that her tea had just arrived. She excused herself and headed straight to the door, opening it and allowing the staff member to bring in the tray, placing it on a side table in the room. Kay put her contacts back on while she waited until the girl was gone and the door was closed again. She headed over to the tray and poured herself a cup of the freshly brewed tea, the aroma filling the air. She poured one for Atheus as well, just in case he wanted it. Then she returned to her seat on the sofa and after sitting, she took in a grateful sip of tea. Her eyes closed while the hot liquid went down her throat, warming her on the inside. Tea was always so soothing and comforting.

After a moment her eyes opened again and looked up at her guest. "I know the Hunger Ghosts that you speak of. I have seen mine. There are two. I saw them when I was at a First Order fundraiser recently. They are beast-like, one large and muscular, while the other seemed skinny and frail but was equally vicious. Needless to say, I didn't stay there for very long. I haven't seen them while I've been awake ever since. But I hear them sometimes, at night when I'm alone. I don't sleep in darkness anymore. There is always a light...always a steady light..." Her voice trailed off as she had another sip of her tea.