I Digress, I Did NOT Sleep With Your Not-So-Young-Wife (Tracyn Ordo/Josh DragonsFlame)

[Josh Dragovalor]

It'd been awhile since Josh and Tracyn had really spoken. With Asha having driven them batty in every karking direction, and the twos schedules, it was rather difficult for the two friends to really speak. Of course, the ordeal had also strained their friendship, and Josh figured it was about time he tried to bury the hatchet with his pal.

That, and... Josh had noticed it as of late. Tracyn had been acting out more and more lately, and he heard more and more reports of it. Out of concern, Josh decided he would try and talk to Tracyn about it, hoping that perhaps he could get to the bottom of what was bothering Ordo.

And thus, after some communication, the two had agreed to meet at a cantina and hang out for a bit over a few drinks. Funnily enough, this was the first time the two had actually spoken on a social occasion. Usually, they just saw each other because of Tracyn's wife's shenanigans, or a mission.

Regardless, Josh walked into the establishment, looking around for Ordo. It wasn't exactly hard to find a bloodlusting Mandalorian/Jedi after all.

@[member="Tracyn Ordo"]

 

[Alan]

It was even easier to find Tracyn, due to the fact that the chosen Cantina, he was known for before he was a Jedi. In a bad way. Nearly an entire section of the bar was cleared as Tracyn sat alone, drinking a lager by himself. Two empty glasses were near his, due to the fact that even the bartender was weary to come near him. As, admittedly, he should have been. He turned his head towards Joshua, slowly and menacingly pointing to the seat next to him. Presumably, Josh sat down as he asked him to. He glared at him whilst finishing his third lager, already pretty...happy, at this point.

He glared at him for a long while, before putting his glass down. He was tempted to smack him with it, among other things. It was now deeply obvious, that something was inherently wrong with Tracyn. He was more brutish and feral looking, with more of a hardened gaze and a paler complexion. He wasn't oozing the presence of a dark sider, but he wasn't also exactly walking the light like he had been before, when Josh knew him with Asha. He glared for a final moment, before looking ahead and speaking.

"Did you?"He asked with a turn of his neck, the fresh tattoos and the low light making him look more like a wolf than a Jedi.

@[member="Joshua DragonsFlame"]

 

[Josh Dragovalor]

Josh could see it in Tracyn's eyes, the brutal hatred. Something was indeed wrong with him, just as Josh had feared. He sat down in the seat that Tracyn had offered to him, and ordered a drink. The bartender hesitantly poured one for him and slid it over. He tilted his head, wondering for a moment why in the blue hell the bartender was so fearful, or why the cantina was so... Cleared out in this part of it. What in blazes had Tracyn done?

He watched Tracyn, not a look of fear or intimidation in his eyes as he waited for Tracyn to stop glaring at him. He wondered, did Tracyn hate him? And if so, why? What had he done to invoke his wrath?

Finally, Tracyn asked a small and simple question. Josh's eyes never left him, his expression never changed.

"Did what?" he asked calmly, yet firmly. What was Tracyn going on about now?

@[member="Tracyn Ordo"]

 

[Alan]

Since Josh obviously didn't get the big beef between the two of them, Tracyn ordered yet another beer. Anything to quell the growing voices and anger. He shut his eyes tightly, screams and monsters of his own mind swarming in his vision and in his ears. They were screaming at him, kill him, kill him, kill them all. He could do it, Josh had let his guard down, all it would take is a quick strike to the nose...he shook his head, holding his temples for a moment. He shook violently, and in his mind, the world was flipping upside down constantly. He hadn't treated or been aware of the poison's effect on him, and it was starting to cost him his sanity. He hadn't slept for days, it was obvious in his eyes. He was relying on the force to even keep him able to move, and it was draining him. He took the glass after a moment, downing a majority of the mostly alcoholic liquid in a few seconds.

"Asha."He sneered, setting the glass down. It pained him to say the name, that much was obvious. It was the situation that Josh probably was aware of, how uncomfortable Tracyn obviously must have been and the suspicions that he must have had. He stared at Josh in his predatory manner, one that replaced his charmed look before. Before, Tracyn had an easy-going and laid-back approach to problems with an underlying tone of sincerity, now, it was just plain murder that was on his mind, all the time.

@[member="Joshua DragonsFlame"]

 

[Josh Dragovalor]

Josh tilted his head, watching Tracyn's body language as he seemed to be struggling with something... A pang of pity crossed his face as he could sense some sort of struggling that he was going through...

Josh took a sip of his beer and waited for him to speak. When Tracyn finally said the word "Asha", Josh blinked, obviously unsure of what he was talking about. What did he mean "Asha"? That was a name Josh hadn't heard in a long time... A frown crossed his face at the mention of it. He still hadn't fully recovered mentally from their Force Bond being snapped when she died.

"Asha what?" he asked calmly, trying to remain calm as he watched the hate that his friend seemed to harbor towards him... Tracyn could see the betrayal on Josh's face as his expression changed while he watched and sensed his tone of voice, his emotions... Everything. All Josh could think was... Why?

@[member="Tracyn Ordo"]

 

[Alan]

"Did anything happen?"His voice was low, but it seemed to be like a boiling pot of water, rather than a hushed tone. He seemed to have the essence of a boiling pot of water, ready to blow at any given second. In fact, he could. His grip tightened on his lager, as his rage started to build up exponentially. Asha was, in all sense of the term, his saving grace. Coupled with him being poisoned by Circe and Asha being taken from him all within a matter of weeks, made him extremely volatile. Combine that with the training that made him lethal as a Mandalorian, and the teachings of the Jedi that made him a force to be reckoned with, and he turned into a Sith-slaughtering, criminal-murdering borderline sociopath all within less than a month. Trails of bodies led to hism, eventually. The outer rim was abuzz with his slaughters, deaths of anyone that even remotely did something bad, and beatings and the occasional execution.

"You two were close. I want to know if anything happened."And in this situation, it would not be very good for Josh if he said anything that Tracyn didn't want to hear.

@[member="Joshua DragonsFlame"]

 

[Josh Dragovalor]

"I....."

".... What did you say?"

His eyes widened as he realized what Tracyn was implying. The cold stares and the hatred suddenly made sense... But the reasoning behind it... Josh couldn't hold it in, the thoughts of worry suddenly left his body as he suddenly felt merry...

His lip twitched into a grin... And then he burst out into a fit of hysterical laughter.

"Oh my god... You... AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA" he said as he pounded his fist on the table several time in hysterical laughter. Did he REALLY think he'd slept with Asha? He was with Saoirse for god sakes, the thought of him neglecting his faith to her was outlandish and hilarious.

"Oh god.... Oh god... Okay... I'm okay...." he said, wiping a tear from his eye. "Did you... Did you seriously say.... What I think you said?" he asked, grinning. "Please tell me... That... Haha.... I misheard that...."

@[member="Tracyn Ordo"]

 

[Alan]

There wasn't a moments hesitation from Tracyn as he reached down to his leg, quite casually even for his speed, and slammed the knife between Josh's fingers. The blade didn't even skim him, but it certainly made an impact with the bar patrons as they stared at the two, eager and terrified of what Tracyn was going to do next."I agonized over those thoughts, that my wife would cheat on me for months, and you're going to laugh about it. You son of a queen....The only thing holding me back from slamming this knife straight through the roof of your mouth is the fact that you're above me in rank and that you're a Jedi. So please, for the love of the safety of the people and your own, have a little more god damn empathy about my current situation."Even though his words came from a place of anger, they were said quite calmly, which, made the threat seem more genuine. Not that he wouldn't do that, it's just that Tracyn had a difficult enough time killing people before, and to assault one of his (most likely only) friend(s). He stared at him for a good while longer, before turning back to the bar.


"I'm gonna finish up my drink, and then I'm gonna go get on my ship and go. Don't follow me." Tracyn said, sipping at what remained of his lager. After his piece, he seemed sort of content and there seemed to be an air of relief about him...for a manner of two seconds. And almost instantly, the desire to maim and kill came back to Tracyn, as the voices, ghosts, monsters, and screams came back to him, though it didn't show on his face, but it showed in his eyes, which is why he kept them from Josh's analytic and knowledgeable stare.

@[member="Joshua DragonsFlame"]

 

[Josh Dragovalor]

Josh raised an eyebrow and his expression turned serious as Tracyn near stabbed him. It only worsened at his warning...

Josh suddenly grabbed Tracyn by the robes as he turned to leave, spun him around and pulled him back, his hand on his neck.

Josh said, quietly into his ear.... "I... Did not... Kark... Your.... Wife. You hear me?" he said calmly, yet Tracyn could tell that Josh wasn't happy at what he had tried to do.

Josh pushed him back away from him, a glare on his face. "I spent so long. SO LONG... Protecting YOUR KARKING MARRIAGE!" he shouted. "I took in your crazy wife, because she wanted to kidnap me, run away and be a god... Forsaken... COUPLE!" he stated, the argument getting the attention of all the patrons in the bar, who stared.

"I have done NOTHING... But look out for YOU... And look out for your stupid marriage with a wife who was SO DAMN CRAZY that she wanted to ditch you, and your child, and run off with someone who was already with a woman, who wouldn't give her up for the sith forsaken WORLD!"

He took a breath, taking a long swig of his beer.

"I'm sorry...." he said quietly, looking down. "That... That wasn't right of me... For acting out... You're my friend, Tracyn... You're one of my closest friends and I've done all I can to protect you from what she had planned... What she could have done.... Do you know how it feels to have you accuse me of betraying you like that...?"

@[member="Tracyn Ordo"]

 

[Alan]

This was the last straw for Tracyn. To know, that the one thing he was holding onto, was a lie. Strings snapped in his mind. The screams became reality. The demons and ghosts of his past started to caress his skin, as he stood up and glared at Josh. The patrons of the bar knew something was wrong with Tracyn, as soon as he stared at Josh. He wasn't mad at him anymore, no, he was...gone. Tracyn was gone. He blinked, holding his head. The people in the bar became targets, Josh became a ghost, he couldn't even see straight anymore, he didn't know where he was, what he was doing. He stumbled for a moment, then fell. His breathing became rapid, as his attachment to the light faded more and more. It was dwindling, where once was a fire of hope, now was barely an ember. He stood up after a moment, and grabbed a staring patron, throwing him against the wall. His body reacted before his mind could, and he threw him full-strength against the wall, denting the durasteel wall slightly with it's intensity.

He made his way to the door, shaking violently. He had no idea where he was going, he was barely even conscious at the moment. He slipped out of the bar, shoving aside people. He got outside, where the trickling rain turned into a light pour as he stumbled around. He was gasping for breath, his lungs feeling as if they were about to explode. Everything he ever cared about, was a lie. She never cared about him, she never even cared about their son. It was all a lie, he had abandoned so much to come back, sacrificed so much to stay, for what? Nothing. He meant nothing to her. And she had meant everything to him. Tracyn's mind started to twist and contort the world around him. He no longer saw a back alley to a dirty Cantina, but rather a walkway made of bone. He stood up, running down. Versions of himself screamed at him to keep running from it all, switching between each other like a flickering television. Blood started to flood behind him, chasing him like a tidal wave. He wasn't fast enough, and it caught him, throwing him to the ground. It was all the blood he had spilled over the years, come back to haunt him.

Asha stood before him, beautiful as he remembered her. He stood up, pointing at her. In reality, he was still collapsed on the ground, a good distance from the bar due to his surprising speed."YOU LIED TO ME! STRAIGHT TO MY FACE! YOU NEVER CARED, WHAT DO I HAVE NOW? WHAT CAN YOU GIVE ME NOW? YOU WERE THE ONE THING I HAD TO LOOK FORWARD TO, YOU - YOU COLD HEARTED queen! You were distant before, but now, what? What do I have left? TELL ME!"She remained silent, and faded like a failing hologram. He let out a war cry, and eventually came back to reality, slightly. He stood up to his knees, letting the rain and darkness cover him. It was hard to tell what was left of Tracyn at this point, the light had almost vanquished from his body, darkness replacing what was once joy. Anger replaced happiness. Rage replaced memories. Empathy left him in droves. He fell forward to his hands, trying to cling to the last good part of him, the last bit of his old self trying to maintain his persona, trying to maintain his soul. He tried to utter out a cry for help, but only found that he made a sort of bestial and predatory cry, which made the isolated backstreet feel even lonelier than he had been in months.

It was clear, through the waves of pain through the force, that Tracyn would never be, and may never be the same.


@[member="Joshua DragonsFlame"]

 

[Josh Dragovalor]

And the one person that didn't give up on him, that answered his attempted cry for help... Put a hand on his shoulder.

"I'm sorry...." is all he could say quietly. "I tried everything I could to keep everything together with you... I knew that if I told you, with everything going on with Cassus and Kaine... You'd snap... I couldn't let that happen to you... I'm sorry... I'm sorry I said anything..." he said gritting his teeth.

He could feel it. The dark side coursing through Tracyn. His grip on his shoulder tightened a bit as he took a breath, fighting back tears at feeling like he'd failed his friend, like he was the cause for his suffering...

"You need help, Tracyn..." he finally spoke, "I can feel the dark side in you, it's like a plague... You have to fight it... You have to get help... Please...." he cried out, almost desperately. His hysterical laughter from before had turned into hysterics in pain.... Suffering... Devastation...

"I won't let you fall, Tracyn... I refuse to give up on you. I'm not letting you bring anymore pain to yourself...." he whispered. "Come on..." he said as he tried to help him up. "Let's get you back to the Temple... I'll get Selena... We'll find a way to help you... We have to... This can't go on anymore..."

@[member="Tracyn Ordo"]

 

[Alan]

There was a remainder of the old Tracyn, that fought to save his own soul. He wanted to be him again, wanted to be free of the curse."I...I feel it. It's like a cancer...it's been killing me and I didn't know it. I won't ever be the same.."He said. He, at times, was arguably one of the most deadly, proficient in combat, menacing and effective warriors in the order. However, now, he was a mess. He was falling apart, everything in his life, his son, his wife, his redemption, all seemed to him, meaningless with the fact that Asha didn't truly care for him. He leaned backwards, letting out a cry of anguish that was more verbal than anything, but the pain in there was nonetheless agonizing to be near.

"It was all...all a lie. What do I have left, Josh...tell me, what do I have left? I've got...nothing. I have, nothing."He sad, tapping his chest, his breath rapid as he tried to maintain some form of control over himself.

@[member="Joshua DragonsFlame"]

 

[Josh Dragovalor]

He sighed. "Tracyn... You still have your life ahead of you" he said, patting him on the shoulder. "You still have the Republic and the Jedi... You still have me hanging around, trying endlessly to keep you from going off the deep end. And hey, there are plenty of Sith still left to kill" he assured with a slight smirk.

"I can feel the dark side in you, Tracyn..." he said, sighing. "And it's as if it's coming more and more rapidly... What the hell IS this...?"

@[member="Tracyn Ordo"]

 

[Alan]

"Circe...Circe she poisoned me...I thought it was a neurotoxin...It's been lying in wait, waiting until I was so wounded...It's...Sith poison, I think. I don't know."He seemed to be struggling to maintain a sense of control, and not turn into a feral killing machine. The dark side would make Tracyn powerful, immensely, letting him build off years upon years of unquenched and unresolved anger and battlerage and bloodlust. Tracyn backwards, holding his face, shaking it, as if two personalities were trying to vie for control of Tracyn. Screams in his mind became louder, and and the whispers of fallen loves and failed rescues came to his mind, trying to soothe him into the darkness, convincing him of how much power it would give him.

"FIX ME!"He said, grabbing Josh by the collar, his immense strength being able to arm-wrestle two Trandoshans and queen-slap a Sith trooper allowing him to do mostly what he wanted, coupled with the fact that his emotional state was letting him empower himself with the force, creating a very, very, volatile and dangerous person. He shuddered, breathing deeply as he sheepishly let Josh go."If I can't...be fixed, Josh, you have to promise me something.."Tracyn said, trying to calm himself down, but to little or no avail.

@[member="Joshua DragonsFlame"]

 

[Josh Dragovalor]

"Blast it... Sith Poison" he spat. Of course Circe would do something like this... He already harbored a hatred for her after she had turned his brother to the dark side... He wasn't going to let the shrill turn anyone else....

"We're going to fix you Tracyn" he said. "Let's go. Let's get you to the Temple" he said, helping him fully to his feet.

"Can you walk?" he asked. He ignored his wish for a promise... He knew what Tracyn was going to ask of him. He wouldn't do it. Never.

@[member="Tracyn Ordo"]

 

[Alan]

"I'm going dark, I'm not wounded.."Tracyn said, slowly lumbering to his feet. He shut his eyes tightly, holding his head."It's like...someone else is in my head, trying to force everything I've ever done back on me. I feel like a serpents crawling around my mind...Like my serpent crawled around Circe."He lifted his hand for a high five, his other hand trying to hold his head to prevent the screaming in his ears from making him go insane. He tried to concentrate on the good memories, but found that he didn't really have any without Asha, and now those were more or less painful to him."She...she..lied..to..me..she never cared, did she?"Tracyn half-sneered, and the other half sounded almost pitiful, like he was about to cry. It was pitiful and sad what the dark side could reduce Tracyn to, a blubbering mess of anger and emotion rather than a strong-willed Jedi like before.

@[member="Joshua DragonsFlame"]

 

[Josh Dragovalor]

"I think she did care, Tracyn...." he reassured. "She's just.... Crazy" he said. "I think she spent so much time undercover with me that she wanted to live that double life, instead of her actual one. Her sanity levels made her try things she shouldn't have"

He sighed. "Well.... That or she might have been a schutta. But anything is possible" he said with a shrug.

"Come on" he said. "If you can keep from killing people and getting sucked into Circe's black hole, we can get you to the Council and hopefully they can find a cure for the Sith Poison" he assured. "Seriously, NOBODY.... Wants to get sucked into Circe's black hole" he joked. Lightening the mood and trying to distract Tracyn from the darkness was all he could do until they got there...

@[member="Tracyn Ordo"]