Keep Your Thoughts Safe[Aika]

[Nima Tann]

After a long and tiring training with Master E'ron, she was happy that it finally ended, her life was in a loop, training, go to sleep, training again... Nothing interesting was happening lately, and she was afraid of this silence being before the storm. And it was still noon so going home and sleeping would be much of a waste of time.

She made her way to the forests, it was full of oxygen and she needed some. Besides, it was a good opportunity for her to practice her meditation skills.

The scenery changed from grey and silver to green and blue as she continued walking. She went to the center of the forest which had a big space and enough for her to train. Firstly she started by basic meditation, enough to get energy for Alchaka, which wanted a lot to accomplish.

Sitting in a half lotus position, she closed her eyes and let the Force flow through her spirit. Take a breath... Close your thoughts... The Force was a little disturbed from multiple signatures though... But the most readable one was something dark... full of thoughts... and familiar maybe, not so far. Besides, it seemed like it was just around the corner.

She continued meditating, there as no excuse for any disturbances. She came here for a reason, and she was going to manage it without any problems.

[member="Aika Kawakami"]

 

[Aika Kawakami]

Everything in the galaxy radiated an amount of energy. Of course, everything was connected by the Force. The trees, the animals, the grass. Everything had it's own signature. But none stood out more than that of a sentient being. It was like searching for a white nail that sat a top a pile of black ones; impossible to miss. Then again, even the subtle of feelings could not hide from her keen eye..

Hm.... Well, well.. Isn't this a surprise?

It would seem that she has returned. I am curious what brings her back..

Why not make contact and find out for ourselves?

Such a plan is just simple enough to work on such a malleable mind.

Her steps begin to move in the Twi'lek's direction, though her mind had jumped ahead. If she could sense her so easily, making a mental connection would be even more simple. And, indeed it was..

"You still lacks concentration, it seems..."

[member="Nima Tann"]

 

[Nima Tann]

The Force signature came more clear as the seconds continued to pass, feeling a familiar presence as she continued meditating.Her heart beat faster and faster as she felt the darkness in that signature, and a little pain in her head, as if someone was playing with it.

Tick, tock, tick, tock... Time started to flow slower and slower, and then the voice of the thick grass that was covering the whole forest, someone was here. She didn't react first, thinking that she would act paranoid. As the footsteps got near, she felt a sudden, sharp pain in the back of her head, and the voice followed afterwards, revealing the person who had the signature, [member="Aika Kawakami"].

Talking about lack of concentration, she didn't understand what she was talking about at first. She looked at her eyes with a blank stare, still having that pain that made her a little curious about what was happening. "Ma... Master Kawakami? What a pleasant surprise."

Her heart continued to beat faster and faster as she tried to talk. Why was it so so difficult. And why was Master Kawakami looking into her eyes with such curiousity, as if she was waiting for this. Collecting herself, she shook her head.

"Umm... What brings you here?"

 

[Aika Kawakami]

"What brings me here? Isn't that a question that is better directed at you? After all, you were the one who up and left. Though, I believe the term 'running away' better suits.."

Her tone was like speaking with a knife, each word meant to jab at the girl as she continued her slow approach. Aika did not forget things so easily. With the fact that she had watched Nima become possessed, just barely touch a sliver of the world she was in herself, it made her a perfect target. Her mind was always wandering, never on guard or at ease. It was prime real estate for someone to dig into. It should have worried the enigmatic master that was had been, and still manipulating the Twi'lek among others. It should have, but that was as far from the case as possible. No, in fact, it made her......happy, somewhat.

"I must ask, my dear, where was it that you journeyed to? I sense a sort of....well, a difference in you."

[member="Nima Tann"]

 

[Nima Tann]

Yeah, bringing up the past. That's what she would expect from her, not everyone was forgiving like her Master and the center piece of this events, Connor Harrison, who she heard he had been promoted to Master now. Sighing sadly, she looked at her cold, but curious eyes. Putting a fake smile on her face, she talked. "I didn't... umm... I didn't run away. I was just confused, that's a better explanation." She never asked her this question. Why did she return? Master Kawakami knew how to ask questions, indeed. "I don't know where was I journeyed to, but I needed a light when I was lost in darkness. And to my luck, I found it before it's too late. I am not the Padawan I used to be, now. In fact, I am promoted to Knight, and I suppose you want to congratulate me?" She gave a brief answer to her question, but it wasn't the whole truth, she didn't have an answer for herself to this, sadly.

"Master Kawakami, I have a question for you too, why... of all the people I have known here... is your signature the most complex? I can't read you... As if... you have more than one." Avoid the question with another, that was a good strategy. She had this feeling when they first met, and she was having the same feeling now. Master Kawakami had her own agenda of course, and she was one of those people she didn't want to mess with, even though she didn't know her that much. She could know everyone from their signatures but Master Kawakami... that was another story. The pain continued to grow as if someone was cutting her limbs over and over. She started to breathe faster. "I... I don't... feel good."


[member="Aika Kawakami"]

 

[Aika Kawakami]

((OMG... I swear I forgot we were doing this.... >_>;;;; SO SORRY! FORGIVE ME!))

Her grin extended slightly, lips stretching the corners of her mouth as approached, taking just a few more small steps. "Hm... Lies and deceit? Since when are those traits the Jedi teach? Maybe you aren't the same, young Twi'lek who up and left out of fear. And yes, regardless of what you would rather call it, you ran away." Aika's presence was always somewhat heavy, no matter where she was with, or where she was. And this was no exception.

Aika simply stood there as the girl questioned her, obviously looking to avoid giving her own answer. It seemed that Nima became more intriguing with with every thought the poured through her mind. It reminded her of why she first noticed the girl, and why she had found her once more.

"Congratulate you? My dear, Knight, Master... They are all but words. Meaningless terms pressed upon others in order to identify them. Nothing more, nothing less. Had I remained with the Jedi Order, I would still be as I am, yet I would not have the title of Master. Would such a thing make me any less powerful? Any less intelligent? Of course not. So, does such a thing truly matter then? I believe you know the answer for yourself. As for your other question.." A small sigh slipped through her lips, eyes closing. "There's no answer I could give you that you would be able to understand. I am not now, nor have I ever been, as simplistic as other Jedi."

Aika opened her eyes once more as she heard Nima's words. "Relax, child... There is nothing harming you, so seem afraid?" Her voice trailed off as she closed the remaining distance between the two, in what seemed like but a few seconds. Bending at the hip, she leaned over until their faces rested just before one another, her head canting to the side as a slightly sinister grin took position upon her face. "Why so serious?..."

[member="Nima Tann"]

 

[Nima Tann]

"L... lies and deceit? I am not lying... to you, Master Kawakami. Yes I have changed and all but, I went wherever I went because of what I believed, not because I was scared of something and ran away. But we all make... mistakes." She was talking about her fake "love" with Connor of course, well, hers wasn't but he was already moving on so she didn't have a say in this matter. She started to feel like her tattoos were burning, and she was getting... angry. What was happening, she never felt something like that before. Not even when she was on Shri-tal with Connor.

And the speech she was giving about the titles, she seemed right. Titles often meant only a rank, but to earn the rank you had to be stronger, and being a Master wasn’t an easy task, Jedi would give their years to achieve that. “You are right, you are no simple Jedi, but to achieve those ranks you have to show your strength, and by strength I am not only talking about brute force. For example, what you are doing right now, is a good example of... cheating.” The air was cold, she could sense it. She was also curious abot Master Kawakami’s past though, how she achieved the title, and what quality of hers was allowing her to stay in here, and why she was trusted. Well, right now she was thinking many things, as if someone was messing with her head. And that someone was in front of her. As she leaned closer, Nima started to freak out. All this calmness, but she was also threatening, she was wondering how the Master was managing that.

“Uhh... umm.... I am not...uhh...” Stop. Don’t. She was out of words, and the rising temperature wasn’t helping either. She was right, there was nothing to be afraid of, but why was she feeling terrible? And what was this feeling, the voices starting to appear in her head, burning marks in her body... One could say she was getting a little umcomfortable with all this, but one side of her was intrigued enough to stay and listen what she wanted to say. Don’t let her. “I am curious... What do you want to achieve in there Master Kawakami?” She wasn’t a fool, she did a lot of meditation to understand she was messing with her head, but the one thing she was curious about was, why Master Kawakami could wander in her brain in such a freedom.

[SIZE=10.5pt][member="Aika Kawakami"][/SIZE]

 

[Aika Kawakami]

It was a silent gaze for a few moments, but to Nima, it probably felt like years. That long, aimless stare that seemed to dive into her soul. However, it wouldn't last too long before that usual coy grin of hers seeped through. "Now, now.. Lets not pretend as if I can't sense your feelings. Or hear your thoughts, for that matter. Even you should be aware that keeping me out of your mind is an impossible task, yes? As far as power and cheating..." Aika returned to her full standing posture, a light, almost soft chuckle slipping from her lips as she looked over the young Twi'lek. "Those titles do not accurately represent power either. They are simply used as a way to put one person on a pedestal above others. They are nothing more than tools used to stroke the egos of those who are the most underhanded in our galaxy."

"I can smell your fear, child.. One wouldn't have to walk through your mind to see such. Your posture alone tells a great tale. But I digress. Rise, and come with me. We shall continue this conversation as we walk. There are ears about. Those who would prefer you not hear my words, nor heed my teachings."

[member="Nima Tann"]

 

[Nima Tann]

The sentences escaping from her mouth was intriguing, and now she knew why Aika Kawakami was a Master now. "I... uhh..." She had that aura and she was so intelligent that in all those years she stood in Order without making anyone suspicious. Well, Connor always said that there was something with her, and she was curious that how she always found a way to erase those suspicions. Or slip away. The thoughts in her mind made her smile, more like a grin that Master Aika just showed. Oh I like that woman. Let's do it. Since the voice in her head calmed down a bit after her speech, and approved too, she started to talk. She felt different, as if she wasn't the one controlling her actions right now. "You are right, Master Kawakami. I am like an open book. And it's not a good thing. My mask is not enough, I want yours." Threat? Not a step close. It was the excitement of learning and admiration of power. Or was it a threat? She didn't know. "I mean... I want to learn from you." She said having a need to explain herself.

"Let's walk then." She said as she slowly stood up from her half lotus position, giving a smile but still concealing what was happening to her. What was those voices suddenly appearing in her head, and was it a coincidence after being so vulnerable to a mind attack like that. The time would tell, for now, she had no choice but to listen to her teachings. Maybe after then she would find a way to silence them. "After you." Politely showing the forward, giving a little smile, she was ready for this. Or she thought she was. It was like gambling, learning from a Master who was known for her manipulative nature.

[member="Aika Kawakami"].

 

[Aika Kawakami]

"No..." The corners of her lips curled into a more devious grin than usual, one that would leave anyone to question her motivations in, well, anything really. Her steps began, soft and slow as she sauntered forward. "What you said was what you meant. You want a mask. To be able to hide the inner thoughts of your own mind from even the most powerful of Jedi or Sith. You want power. Power to make yourself seem invincible in the mind. But a mask is not enough. Masks can be removed, and even seen through. You want the power to cloud your own mind from even yourself."

Aika's eyes bounced about as the moved on, watching for those that may be lurking. Trust was a fickle thing, at best. And there weren't many that inherently trusted her. Not because she had given them reason not to, but because she still hid much of herself from them. That alone created a feeling of unease whenever she was about, something Aika was well aware of.

"The first time I felt the Force was through a voice, my own voice, but within my mind. Such a thing scared me. Essentially, as my abilities began to blossom, another me came to be, one that I did not recognize. Terrified, I unknowingly created a barrier within my mind that locked this new side of me away. I could neither hear it's thoughts, nor feel its presence. But I certainly knew it still resided within me. It would lay dormant until the day I left the Jedi on Coruscant. That, my dear, was the day I truly awakened. For the first time, I had true clarity. Everything was visible. But I, myself, became more of a ghost than anyone thought possible."

[member="Nima Tann"]

 

[Nima Tann]

"Those voices... I haven't been hearing them until today, before our conversation actually. But for a week I feel like I am acting like someone else. I want to know why its happening to me. I am Nima and I... want to act as myself. If I need power for that, then yes, Master Kawakami, I want power. I want to be like... you." Teasing her and also praising her, she wanted to be not exactly like her, she was talking about the mind controlling techniques and Master Kawakami was the best "Jedi" that used it she's seen so far. The thing she said about masks were the truth. She had many masks but they always saw the real her through. And she was amazed that the shyness minutes ago replaced itself with confidence, even she was much more intrigued from this conversation.

And she got to see a little of Master Kawakami's real past inside of the dialogue. She had this voice inside her head too, maybe... Maybe that's why she was acting like that. Like a ghost... if she quoted her. She wondered. "How does it feel, to have voices inside your head that are always judging you of your actions? To be a ghost, to be a potential suspect for everyone in the home that you believe and stay but always having a chance to escape from judgement except of your own head? Or the emotions inside Aika Kawakami has become a ghost too like her powers? Look everyone may see you as a threat... or something like that. Even the ones that are close to me that said you are dangerous, but there is something about you that I find interesting. Like... I don't know. Dangerous things always were attractive for me. Do I need to become a ghost too, in order to understand you... and help you?" The little speech of her were both coming from inside of her head and real Nima. She felt like somewhat manipulative, playing her own game with the Master. But especially the last sentence, helping part, was her.

[member="Aika Kawakami"]

 

[Aika Kawakami]

An admission of want.......... An admission of what they both already knew..... An admission of what laid true deep within the girl's heart...​

​

"The way you words things is....a bit different than others. Nonetheless, you speak with a small bit of truth." Her eyes closed as she inhaled deeply, rolling her head back a bit. Aika held the breath within for a few moments, followed by an intensely slow exhale. "The voice I hear from within is not one of judgement. On the contrary, it's one that is completely on my side. We finish the thoughts of one another. For the things within reach of my vision that I miss, she can see them. It's like being able to watch everything from multiple angles at once. But that is beside the point."

Each step they took seemed more deliberate as they moved on forward. "I have always stood apart from those around me. The same, yet different. I craved many things. Knowledge. Understanding. It's what separated me from the rest of them. In some regards, your correct, I became a ghost. While others ventured across the stars in search of action, or blindly doing the bidding of the Council or Senate. I remained back. Before I realized it, I had amassed a vast amount of knowledge. And with it came power. Most find people who can gain it through such quiet means are considered to be dangerous. Do you believe me to be dangerous?"

[member="Nima Tann"]