Star Wars Roleplay: Chaos

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Maleificar Chain Blade Arm

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Iimage/Credit: http://www.edgeimport.com/images/111115029656.jpg

ntent: To create a arm of cybernetic, and to attach to a new super soldier project dubbed Maleificar for the Horde. The arm Will serve as the trade Mark of Maleificar SS. It Will be able go act as a Dagger or Kama, depending on the users choice of blades, and a whip at the same time, while also having the ability to knock out an opponent with a small electric charge. The blade is bioengineered by the vong to combat lightsabers.

Development Thread: Will be made if needed.

Manufacturer: Suboch Industries (Horde)
Affiliation: The Horde

Modularity: The blade can be switched out, as well as the length of the chain.

Production:
Minor as only a select few will be 'asked' to be a Maleificar

Matetrial: Arm Will be made of Durasteel, The chain itself will be made of durasteel as well. The Blade is bio-engineered to block lightsabers

Description: The arm is basic, it is just your average cybernetic arm for those why have lost a arm, but it will vary to the left or right arm, subject's choice. A pully worked by a small engine will be attached to the elbow, giving it a ball socket affect, as the chain will be connected to the pulley, giving it a recall system if thrown, or used as a whip. the blade will appear as nothing more but a spike on the arm. With a flick of the elbow and wrist the blade will detach from the rest its locked into, and come to the palm, its then able to be thrown, and recalled. This will be a Kama, a dagger, or any small melee blade, with a chain on the handle, attached to a pulley in the elbow, giving the ability to call it back to the user's hand. The chain is just a simple metal link chain.

Weakness includes, Time delay, from the flicks of the elbow and wrist, to the throwing of the blade, its time consuming, Energy store only holds enough charge for two attempts of knocking out a enemy.
Durasteel Arm: The arm can be cut off making the person armless again. The chain itself, as well as can be cut off.

Strengths are as seen, range/melee capability, as well as the ability to deflect lighstabers, a small energy store will be place into the shoulder giving another ball socket effect, and will be able to hold small amounts of electricity capable of only subduing a enemy.
Force Dead: The blade, arm, and chain can not be effected by the force, besides physical attacks such as fire.
Knock Out: With only a charge strong enough for two attempts, it can knock out a opponent for none lethal take downs.
Bio Blade: being Vong bio-engineered the blade can block lightsabers


Class: Melee/Range (Dagger, Scythe, Glaive, as whips)

Size: One Hand (Kama, Dagger, Sythe, blades of these manners)

Length: Blade is size varies, but nothing over 15 inches, while the chain starts at 7 feet long, it can be shorten to 4 feet long and made longer at 10

Other Features: N/A.
 

Popo

I'm Sexy and I Know It
@[member="Incubus"]
Alright, got a lot of issues with this one, so let's get started.

First off, you imply with the name that this is something like a chainsaw arm, which from reading the description, it's not.

Second off, the intent is not clear. You state that its to mate a cybernetic limb with a super soldier program and that it will become a trademark for said supersoldiers. The intent is your area to explain what the weapon is supposed to do. Specifically, you describe in short what the weapon itself does, not what it does for the company or image of those using it. Please edit accordingly.

The material is fine, but contradicts with your description. You say it can deflect lightsabers. Durasteel, which is what you're making this out of, does not deflect lightsabers. Please edit accordingly in your submission or edit your materials to a lightsaber resistant material which will usually require a dev thread for the material used.

The description is very vague and describes a weapon I'm not comfortable with in the way it's described. It sounds less like a chain blade/chainsaw arm as is implied in the title and more like a chainsaw whip type thing. The reason chainsaws do not function well as whips is that the chainsaw functions with a motor, two pulleys, and a toothed blade rotating around those pulleys. You need that second, forward pulley to function like a chainsaw. A flexible "blade" to rotate around isn't plausible. The chain must have a groove or niche to rotate in, otherwise the chain will come off the blade itself and become useless. For a good reference of how that looks, look here. Also, you state in the weaknesses that it has enough power for two charges in the weapon to attempt to knock out an opponent, but I see nothing referencing this in the Materials section and I cannot see anything clearly stated alluding or referencing the ability in the description. Please fully and clearly describe that in an edit or remove it entirely.

The description and the following sections describing length, size, class and all lead me to believe you're trying to make a chainsaw whip that can do anything and everything both a whip and a chainsaw can do, which is fine, but even with star wars physics it's not possible with a chainsaw and, even if it was, it would be so unwieldy and dangerous to the user that it would be completely ineffective in combat and totally useless when compared to any other melee weapon in use, including a standard chainsaw.

All in all, I'm gonna ask you to make some pretty substantial edits to this submission. I'm okay with you taking your time and I'm okay with working with you on this sub, but anything less than substantial edits to make this weapon at least plausible will lead to a denied submission.
 
@[member="Popo"]

I've changed it so the description is clear that its a blade dagger thing, with a link chain.

Weakness includes that it can be cut off, arm blade it chain.

Description also states the battery charge and ability to knock out.
 

Popo

I'm Sexy and I Know It
@[member="Incubus"]
I will review this in due time. You have been warned once already by the Factory Admin, @[member="Fabula Cavataio"]. You will not be warned again. Any subsequent edits you make to your submission can be mentioned in an edit to the same post you used to notify us of an edit. You don't need 3 separate posts to notify an FJ. Also, please refrain from PMing FJs to look at your submissions. There are often many submissions requiring our attention and we will get to yours as soon as we reasonably can. Pestering staff will not get your submission seen faster. That said, questions or requests for help are appreciated and will be responded to if given in a polite or at least civil manner. Thank you.

I am currently running errands and am not able to appropriately review the edits right now. I will be home and able to review them in roughly an hour (ETA 21:00 EST).

EDOT: Apologies, you were not warned by Fabula. Wrong sub I believe. However do please refrain from bumping a submission. Thank you.
 

Popo

I'm Sexy and I Know It
[member="Incubus"]
Dredge spoke to me at length about this sub and that he'd spoken to you on it. What's the status on this sub? Did you still want it to be judged?
 
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