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Codex Denied Memorial

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Viridian

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V
OUT OF CHARACTER INFORMATION
chris-anderson-016-nathema-planet.jpg

  • Intent: This planet is to provide a treasure planet where Archaeologists, and Thieves can steal things. Also to create the original world of the Veldorians.
  • Image Credit: Here
  • Canon: N/A
  • Permissions: N/A
  • Links: N/A
GENERAL INFORMATION
  • Planet Name: Memorial
  • Demonym: Citadens
  • Region: Deep Core
  • System Name: N/A
  • System Features: N/A
  • Location:
  • Major Imports: Due to the desolation caused by the Bryn'adul invasion of Memorial that was beat back, the planet has no imports of any kind as it lacks the infrastructure to support importing things.
  • Major Exports: Due to the desolation caused by the Bryn'adul invasion of Memorial that was beat back, the planet has no exports of any kind whatsoever.
  • Unexploited Resources: Force Relics stored in the Vault of the Ages. Thousands of Lightsaber Crystals of varying varieties. Corpses of Veldorians for use in Alchemic Horrors, and Science Experiments. Various Edible and Medicinal Plants that grow on the surface. Various Mushrooms that grow underground. Designs for new pieces of technology.
GEOGRAPHIC INFORMATION
  • Gravity Twice Standard
  • Climate: Temperate
  • Primary Terrain: Grassland, Mountains, Oceans, Tundras, Forests, Ice. Desert.
  • Atmosphere: Type I
LOCATION INFORMATION
  • Capital City: Citadel - An underground City that the 20 who remained moved to so they could hide from the Bryn'adul and live in. This city is an underground Fortress that is cloaked via the Force, Stealth Field Generators, Bio Detection Blockers, and many other forms of defense.
  • Planetary Features:
  • Major Locations:
  • Force Nexus (Optional):
    Intent: To hide many trinkets that I will be apping.
    Nexus Name: The Vault of the Ages
  • Nexus Alignment: Other: During the day the Vault is Lightsided, whereas when night falls, the Vault is Darksided.
  • Size: Medium
  • Strength: Moderate
  • Accessibility: Hidden
  • Effects: This induces Fear during the night, a desire to run away from the vault. During the day, it projects illusions to try to lead people away from the vault, to make them stay away from the contents of the vault.

POPULATION
  • Native Species: Veldorian
  • Immigrated Species: Worm Creatures, Insect Creatures.
  • Population: 20 Veldorians, though they're underground literally.
  • Demographics: N/A
  • Primary Languages: N/A
  • Culture: Everyone for themselves.
GOVERNMENT & ECONOMY
  • Government: N/A
  • Affiliation: N/A
  • Wealth: Low
  • Stability: Low
  • Freedom & Oppression: N/A
MILITARY & TECHNOLOGY
  • Military: Small Militia of 10.
  • Technology: While they do have some things such as blasters (albeit made out of wood) that they can utilize, and working comms on the planet, they lack the technology to leave the world. They've got farm equipment, Hydroponics, Hovercraft, and limited access to the Holonet. (Mainly for streaming cat videos, and the like.).
HISTORICAL INFORMATION

The first home of the Veldorians - the one they were forced to flee from as the Bryn'adul launched their onslaught that wiped out most of their culture and traditions. It is this homeworld that is where the Veldorians have left behind most of their culture, and resources. The planet has lots of historical relics and valuables on it, should any enterprising adventurer wish to come to the planet. However, the planet is not without it's own defenses against such made by 20 Veldorians who did not leave the planet, but managed to hide.

Worms rampage across the surface as do insect creatures. Rodents rampage across the surface as well. Technology is all across the surface that people could harvest, as are Force Relics. The planet also has 10,000 Unrooted that have not had owners.
 
Last edited by a moderator:
Major Faction

Ettiene Kharne

Well-Known Member
Ettiene Kharne
Character Bio
Hey there, Viridian!

I'm going to be the Codex Judge working with you through this review and approval process. Hopefully we can make this a quick and painless process, but before I can clap an approval on this, there's some items I'd like to address and draw your attention to. If for any reason you don't understand something I am asking for, please do not hesitate to ask me to restate or give further clarification.

Viridian said:
GENERAL INFORMATION
  • Planet Name: Memorial
  • Demonym: Citadens
  • Region: Deep Core
  • System Name: N/A
  • System Features: N/A
  • Location:
Click to expand...
If you would be so kind as to complete these sections highlighted that would be greatly appreciated. You don't need to go over the top with explanation or anything, but you should at least provide the general information requested here.

Viridian said:
GENERAL INFORMATION
  • Major Imports: Due to the desolation caused by the Bryn'adul invasion of Memorial that was beat back, the planet has no imports of any kind as it lacks the infrastructure to support importing things.
  • Major Exports: Due to the desolation caused by the Bryn'adul invasion of Memorial that was beat back, the planet has no exports of any kind whatsoever.
Click to expand...
Please link the Bryn'adul you reference here. Thanks!

Viridian said:
GENERAL INFORMATION
  • Unexploited Resources: Force Relics stored in the Vault of the Ages. Thousands of Lightsaber Crystals of varying varieties. Corpses of Veldorians for use in Alchemic Horrors, and Science Experiments. Various Edible and Medicinal Plants that grow on the surface. Various Mushrooms that grow underground. Designs for new pieces of technology.
Click to expand...
Would it be possible for you to list specific examples of what you would find. Lightsabers crystals, for instance, occur in a number of different environments and can contribute a number of different effects. Anything special or rare (ie force relics, lightsaber crystals, etc) should be linked.

Viridian said:
LOCATION INFORMATION
  • Capital City: Citadel - An underground City that the 20 who remained moved to so they could hide from the Bryn'adul and live in. This city is an underground Fortress that is cloaked via the Force, Stealth Field Generators, Bio Detection Blockers, and many other forms of defense.
Click to expand...
Is there a way here that you can list specific examples of the technology you mention here?

Viridian said:
LOCATION INFORMATION
  • Planetary Features:
  • Major Locations:
Click to expand...
Please be sure to fill out all required fields listed in the template.

Viridian said:
  • Force Nexus (Optional):
    Intent: To hide many trinkets that I will be apping.
    Nexus Name: The Vault of the Ages
  • Nexus Alignment: Other: During the day the Vault is Lightsided, whereas when night falls, the Vault is Darksided.
  • Size: Medium
  • Strength: Moderate
  • Accessibility: Hidden
  • Effects: This induces Fear during the night, a desire to run away from the vault. During the day, it projects illusions to try to lead people away from the vault, to make them stay away from the contents of the vault.
Click to expand...
A Force Nexus doesn't work in the way you are describing via your intent listed as a Force Nexus is a location that is unusually strong in the Force. It would necessarily be there to hide material things such as trinkets and would have likely existed long before the planet would have ever been settled. If this is the intent behind this Nexus on the planet, I will have to deny the Force Nexus part of the planet and request that you remove it since a Force Nexus will not have a will.

As far as the alignment goes, the premise currently proposed does not fit with the canon of star wars as a Force Nexus will only change its alignment for a few reasons, usually due to a presence or event. For instance Korriban was dark because of the planet's saturation of Sith thus a saturation of the Dark Side.

Viridian said:
POPULATION
  • Native Species: Veldorian
  • Immigrated Species: Worm Creatures, Insect Creatures.
  • Population: 20 Veldorians, though they're underground literally.
  • Demographics: N/A
  • Primary Languages: N/A
  • Culture: Everyone for themselves.
Click to expand...
Do you have any specific examples you can provide here?

Viridian said:
POPULATION
  • Native Species: Veldorian
  • Immigrated Species: Worm Creatures, Insect Creatures.
  • Population: 20 Veldorians, though they're underground literally.
  • Demographics: N/A
  • Primary Languages: N/A
  • Culture: Everyone for themselves.
Click to expand...
Please make sure you're completing these points as laid out in the template. For population, although the specific is a nice touch, please make sure you are including the ratings listed in the template.

Viridian said:
GOVERNMENT & ECONOMY
  • Government: N/A
  • Affiliation: N/A
  • Wealth: Low
  • Stability: Low
  • Freedom & Oppression: N/A
Click to expand...
Please be sure you are filling all these points out. If there is no government present, please just state "None" for this item. The same could be said for affiliation. For wealth and stability, please be sure to include a brief description as to why there are as they are.

Viridian said:
MILITARY & TECHNOLOGY
  • Military: Small Militia of 10.
  • Technology: While they do have some things such as blasters (albeit made out of wood) that they can utilize, and working comms on the planet, they lack the technology to leave the world. They've got farm equipment, Hydroponics, Hovercraft, and limited access to the Holonet. (Mainly for streaming cat videos, and the like.).
Click to expand...
How equipped is this small militia? Would the Fortress city you mention earlier in the sub not count toward this military and technology?

Viridian said:
HISTORICAL INFORMATION

The first home of the Veldorians - the one they were forced to flee from as the Bryn'adul launched their onslaught that wiped out most of their culture and traditions. It is this homeworld that is where the Veldorians have left behind most of their culture, and resources. The planet has lots of historical relics and valuables on it, should any enterprising adventurer wish to come to the planet. However, the planet is not without it's own defenses against such made by 20 Veldorians who did not leave the planet, but managed to hide.

Worms rampage across the surface as do insect creatures. Rodents rampage across the surface as well. Technology is all across the surface that people could harvest, as are Force Relics. The planet also has 10,000 Unrooted that have not had owners.
Click to expand...
Is there any way in which you can expand on this? If there's a history on the planet of strife and conflict which led to the relics that now preside on the planet, that would be amazing information to include in this submission to give us a fuller image and understanding as to what this planet was before and what it has become now. Please also take a moment to list the "Unrooted" with your species on the planet mentioned earlier in the submission.

I know I've pointed to a lot here in this submission and if you would like, I can move this to the "Pre-Factory" for the edits to allow your more time to do so. Please let me know your decision and tag me with any changes or updates if you choose to make them here.
 
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