Approved NPC Militibus ex inferis

[Skorvek]

[SIZE=11pt]OUT OF CHARACTER INFORMATION[/SIZE]

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  [SIZE=11pt]Intent: To create a guard unit for Adara Cadera[/SIZE]
  
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  [SIZE=11pt]Image [/SIZE][SIZE=11pt]Credit[/SIZE]: https://www.artstation.com/artwork/PXwdZ
  
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  [SIZE=11pt]Role: Guards for Adara [/SIZE]
  
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  [SIZE=11pt]Links: Anubians[/SIZE]
  

[SIZE=11pt]GENERAL INFORMATION[/SIZE]

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  [SIZE=11pt]Unit [/SIZE][SIZE=11pt]Name[/SIZE][SIZE=11pt]: Militibus ex inferis[/SIZE]
  
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  [SIZE=11pt]Affiliation: Mandalorian Empire[/SIZE]
  
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  [SIZE=11pt]Classification: Guards[/SIZE]
  
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  [SIZE=11pt]Equipment: Modified [/SIZE][SIZE=11pt]Verpine Fiber Ultramesh[/SIZE](The only Modifications to it are esthetics and built to fit their body structure)[SIZE=11pt] , [/SIZE][SIZE=11pt]Nightsister_Energy_Lance[/SIZE][SIZE=11pt], x2 [/SIZE][SIZE=11pt]Vibroswords[/SIZE][SIZE=11pt].[/SIZE]
  

[SIZE=11pt]COMBAT INFORMATION[/SIZE]

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  [SIZE=11pt]Availability: [/SIZE][SIZE=11pt] Unique.[/SIZE][SIZE=11pt] [/SIZE]
  
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  [SIZE=11pt]Deployment: [/SIZE][SIZE=11pt]Limited.[/SIZE][SIZE=11pt] [/SIZE]
  
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  [SIZE=11pt]Strengths [/SIZE][SIZE=11pt]&[/SIZE][SIZE=11pt] [/SIZE][SIZE=11pt]Weaknesses[/SIZE][SIZE=11pt]:[/SIZE]
  
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  +Physically honed: Anubians tend to maintain a very fit physique due to their unique metabolism, and as such are usually very strong or agile, usually a mix of the two, allowing them to excel naturally in the field of battle.
  
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  [SIZE=11pt]+Loyal till Death: They have been trained to carry out their orders no matter what and if caught will do what they can to ensure their lives are forfeit.[/SIZE]
  
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  [SIZE=11pt]+ Close Range Fighter:They have great proficiency with almost any Melee or close range weapon as well as hand to hand combat.[/SIZE]
  
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  [SIZE=11pt]+High Intellect: All Anubians have a higher brain function then most making them incredibly intelligent.[/SIZE]
  
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  [SIZE=11pt]+Resistant to heat: They were raised and trained in the heat therefore there bodies thrive in the heat[/SIZE]
  
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  [SIZE=11pt](+) Force Sensitive: Force sensitivity, in recent generations, has suddenly become quite prevalent in Anubian DNA, who are now naturally born with a large midichlorian count. The cause for this seems to be some sort of genetic evolution caused by the recent Netherworld event.[/SIZE]
  
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  [SIZE=11pt](-) Hates the cold: Given they are used to desert like climates they hates when its ice cold.[/SIZE]
  
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  [SIZE=11pt](-) Sensitive hearing: While they can hear better and more precise then some. High pitched noises can deafen and cause extreme pain to them without proper protection.[/SIZE]
  
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  [SIZE=11pt](-) Digitigrade Legs: Sadly due to their legs they cannot fit in or pilot small ships without extreme modifications done to it. As well as can be easily tripped if caught off guard.[/SIZE]
  
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  [SIZE=11pt](-) Bad aim: they can use a blaster but they cant hit with ranged weapons as well as they can with melee[/SIZE]
  
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  [SIZE=11pt](-) Height: Due to their species being rather large they can become quite the big target on the field.[/SIZE]
  

[SIZE=11pt]Description: Due to recent events and how important Adara has become especially to her mother and how many enemies the Mandalorians have accumulated over the years the child would need more guards then what she has, Skorvek spent a few months working and training his strongest warriors for this task and this task alone. Honing them to do one thing and that thing is to protect the child with there lives and only take orders from him or the mother, They were trained in harsh environments and even sparred against each other multiple times until Skorvek was satisfied. The armor they where given was useful yet changed to fit there size and build and armed accordingly with weaponry that while somewhat outdated it did the job, Skorvek made sure they met the approval of [member="Yasha Cadera"] before making them official members of the warriors and hoped to make them a deadly guard force for the child while some of them might take there job abit too seriously there will be others to put them in there place but they all will ensure they work together to protect the child as if she was one of their own young.[/SIZE]

 

[Srina Talon]

Under Review [member="Skorvek"]

 

[Srina Talon]

[member="Skorvek"] Hello! These are some very scary guards for the little lady! I like them - But, there were just a few things that will need to be adjusted.

1.) VERY cool artwork but Pinterest, unfortunately, isn't an acceptable way to show proper credit for an image. You can try and reverse image search it to find the artist or choose a new one if that suits you better. (Let me know if you need help finding it...I can try and look too.)

2.) Under "Links" please add a link to the Approved Chaos Species "Anubians"

3.) Under "Affiliation" please link the "Mandalorian Empire"

4.) Under "Equipment" can you please describe what "Modified Verpine Fiber Ultramesh" is? It's just the word modified that I'm inquiring about. If it's basic cosmetic changes and whatnot feel free to note that, but, if there are any significant changes or improvements you may need sub the item before it can be used here.

5.) On the Anubian Species Submission, they are listed as having a High Level of Force Sensitivity, but I see no mention of that here. If they are Force Sensitive please add it to the Strengths section and provide a short snippet of to what degree.

6.) You have a nice bit of information in the "Description" but the flow of it is a little choppy. Please take a gander and see if you can add just a little more detail and clean up some of the sentence structure for easy reading. I can see their basic function of protecting the child at all costs, but, it would also be nice to know how they work as a unit. I see that they were trained hard but where did Skorvek find them? Any sort of tactical information? Do they prefer to guard from the shadows or out in the open?

Please tag me if you need any assistance - I'd be happy to help.

 

[Skorvek]

[member="Srina Talon"] Edited accordingly to i think the right standards.

 

[Srina Talon]

[member="Skorvek"]

Thank you!

I also noticed another small discrepancy between this submission and the Anubian submission so I did edit it in below. It states:

Physically Honed:
Anubians tend to maintain a very fit physique due to their unique metabolism, and as such are usually very strong or agile, usually a mix of the two, allowing them to excel naturally in the field of battle.

But under strengths you have:

+High Physical prowess:These beasts are built to be quick and physically stronger than most species

Those two phrases do not imply the same thing. The submission states they are strong, but, it doesn't say they are stronger than most species. Please update when you can or add a reason why this would be true or feel free to let me know if I misread.

After that one of the only things left to do is take care of the image. We can't use Pinterest as a sourcing option. This guide gives us excellent suggestions on how to do that. Also, it seems silly, but your image is just slightly out of range. The Max is 1000x750 but this image is 564x755 so the height is a little off. Once it gets sourced properly you can either edit it smaller or stick it in a spoiler. <3

If you can't find it please let me know and I can try and search for it as well.

 

[Skorvek]

[member="Srina Talon"] I believe i fixed it all accordingly I changed the source and I fixed up the physical strength stuff and just used the one off there species template

 

[Srina Talon]

[member="Skorvek"] Thank you on both accounts. The only thing thing that didn't get changed was the sizing of the image.

Also, it seems silly, but your image is just slightly out of range. The Max is 1000x750 but this image is 564x755 so the height is a little off. Once it gets sourced properly you can either edit it smaller or stick it in a spoiler. <3

 

[Skorvek]

i put it in a spoiler as i dont know how to size it properly [member="Srina Talon"]

 

[Srina Talon]

[member="Skorvek"] I see that it's sized correctly now. Let me pass this up. Thank you!

Pending Secondary Approval

[member="Jyoti Nooran"]

 

[Eugen Aker]

[member="Skorvek"]

Approved.