Star Wars Roleplay: Chaos

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Approved NPC Mittens Clones

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Name: Mittens Clones
Intent: To provide the members of One Sith with a feline combat unit and infiltrator.
Affiliation: One Sith
Availability: Common
Quality: D, but they can be trained.
Type: Infantry
Strength: 5 (or less can be used)
Description: The original Mittens was an innocent victim of the Invasion of Contruum injured by the actions of Commander Lusk as he shot down a satellite resulting in the debris raining down on the Republic military garrison, causing damage to the structure’s roof. This blow knocked a cross beam down on the inside of the building hitting Mittens in the hindquarters, paralyzing his rear legs and tail.

The function of the Mittens Clones is purely to unleash kitty justice onto enemies of One Sith. Mittens clones are irresistibly cute, have a better sense of hearing and smell than humans, have the ability to survive falls from great heights, and the ability to sense upcoming disasters. Mitten clones' sight are lacking as a single eye from each was replaced with a camera additionally, as thet are cats and not an androids, it can be hard to command them however, with time and patience, they can be trained.

The clones are equipped with a camera in place of one of his eyes, a wiretap implanted beneath his fur, durasteel coated front claws, and thrusters in his hind legs (since the orignial Mitten's back legs and tails were paralyzed, they have been replaced with mechanical versions). Their prosthetic legs are covered with synthetic fur to make him appear as if they were normal cats. Each clone comes with a feline combat vest bearing a One Sith insignia, and carry basic medical supplies.

Links:

Mitten's First Appearance

Development Thread
 
[member="Konrad von Grimmelshausen"]



Konrad von Grimmelshausen said:
Strength: 5 (or less can used)
There's a small, two letter word missing here.



Konrad von Grimmelshausen said:
Mittens clones are irresistibly cute, has a better sense of hearing than humans, has the ability to survive falls from great heights, and the ability to detect upcoming disasters.
s/has/have - this is a matter of tense. You're using past tense here, while the tone of the submission is present tense. Thus, it would be 'have', not 'has', and for the sake of the sentence not flowing awkwardly, you only need one instance of 'have', being the first instance.

Please read through your submission carefully and edit for things like the above. If you need help with grammar, punctuation, and whatnot, please do not hesitate to ask. :)
 
[member="Ilias Nytrau"] Fixed and rechecked my submission for grammartical errors. Thanks for picking them up :), they slipped through when I was editing it.
 
[member="Konrad von Grimmelshausen"]

No problem! Thank you for being so prompt where... I have not been! Oh, I am sorry for that, but here we are, so let's get on with pushing this one through!

I know this must be a pain, what I'm about to ask, but could you please pull out the relevant posts from the invasion and link them in sequential order into your submission? See, a normal dev thread is dedicated solely to the purpose it was created for and is a much simpler matter but an invasion used as a dev thread leaves countless posts to be waded through that are irrelevant to your submission, and only you know exactly which posts matter.

Please number them, it'll help. :)
 
[member="Ilias Nytrau"]

Added, Mittens only appeared in one post of the invasion. It's not much of a dev thread but I thought it would be a good addition for his history. Also, thanks for you explaination of dev theads and no worries, real life can get busy sometimes :)
 
[member="Konrad von Grimmelshausen"]

One post?! Man, really? Geez. :p

In light of that, could I get some dev? I feel slightly silly for asking, given it's a cat, and given that I've already made you wait... but you gotta do what's got to be done!

One thread, ten posts minimum, detailing such things as the discovery of this poor cat, cloning, and the alterations of the clones to your obviously nefarious and Sithly purposes? Altered, cloned cats don't just appear out of thin air, as much as I'd like them to... that would be kind of boss.

Tag me when you've got it done.
 
[member="Ilias Nytrau"]

Development thread completed and added.

Changed the wiretap to be under his fur and added that there was synthetic fur put on top of his prosthetics to make him appear as if he was an average cat.
 
[member="Konrad von Grimmelshausen"]

Good, good, and good. Thank you for your cooperation! Now, I watched the development thread as you wrote it, and it seems you did well to pay attention to the process, right through to training! Excellent.

So with that said, these Mittens Clones get a pending approval stamp from me, and will be sent off to one of [member="Valiens Nantaris"] or [member="Lorelei Darke"]... whoever gets to it first.

Lastly, I thank you for your patience, and the Codex thanks you for your patronage!
 
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