Public Move On, Move Forward. [OPEN to JEDI]

[Ran Serys]

Selvaris Enclave - 0200 Hours - A dark and stormy morning.

In the wee hours of the morning she trained. She trained to get a head start on her day. She trained so that her schedule would be open the rest of the day. She trained, more than anything, so she could keep the demons away.

In the nights leading up to the morning, Ran had been plagued by nightmares. In the nightmares a Sith sat on a pedestal before her. They held the end of a long and heavy chain attached to an iron collar around Ran's neck. The irons were rough on edge and left shallow cuts as she struggled to pull away from the Sith. The cuts went deeper with any motion. Droplets of blood settled in the divets of her collar bone. Through the pain, both emotional and physical, she fought for her freedom. When she stopped trying to struggle her eyes shot blaster bolts through the evil being, and then she saw their power. Awesome and selfish, the power they wielded was so singular and epic. Like nothing she had seen. Although she had seen power akin to it.

Away from the nightmare, just a few short days ago, she saw great power over Sluis Van. She was traumatized, in some small way, by the Dark God Darth Empyrean during their exchange aboard the planet's floating shipyards. He was strong enough to deny her strike team their goals. He was strong enough to become the source of her newly established nightmares. He was strong enough to become the fuel for more intensive training. Him and the rest of her past. After three years of freedom, Ran began to believe she might never escape the influence of the Sith.

So Ran stood in the rugged and rustic, stone domed, mud floored longhouse, the one that had been dubbed the Selvaris Enclave's Training Hall, and swung her saber endlessly in patterns some would recognize and then in patterns some wouldn't. Her lightsaber's sapphire blade danced around her with a deadly grace and an angelic violence even on the rough terrain.

 

[Aris Noble]

"You're training harder than normal, Master Serys."

It'd been a little while since he last saw Master Ran, though he distinctly remembered her being taller than him at the time. Not so much now, it seemed. He'd kept quiet at first, again watching to study her form as he had the first time they'd met. But he could see more to it now. A desperation. Coping, almost, with something unseen otherwise. It wasn't training so much as a need to do something.

He understood that, at least.

"Are you alright?"

Ran Serys

 

[Connel Vanagor]

"Are you alright?"

​

"In my experience,
when you think you
understand the Force,
you realize just
how little you know"​

[COMM TRAFFIC]
LOCATION : Selvaris | OBJECTIVE : Following the Force |TAG (FRIENDLY) : Ran Serys | Aris Noble

I was about to ask the same thing Connel spoke up not far behind. He was in his “Shadow” gear, mask off and combat shield over his back. He was here looking for something that could help in his current assignment. If you asked him what that assignment was, he would simply say “nunya”... you can figure out the rest. Nothing rude, or out of mind, but the Knight was still getting comfortable in this new path so he took it very seriously.

Seeing Ran training hard, with his recent past meant she was struggling, and was not “alright” no matter what she would say. It was her business to bring it up, but he could speak from experience, holding it in did more damage. Of course there was Aris… the last time he saw the young Noble, he was taller… yeah… that wasn’t the case anymore…

Stang! Did your father pull some “stretch” trick out of his Runes? He was not trying to be insulting to father or son, just a unique way of observing just how tall the kid is.

All kidding aside... it's good to see you, the both of you...

 

[Ran Serys]

She heard his words but they didn't register immediately. She was too focused and too distracted, on and by her own movements. When Aris spoke again he freed Ran from the trance she'd put herself in. Her eyes went wide in surprise. Her conscious mind had been so removed from the moment that she ignored all stimuli around her, so much so that she had initially ignored the young man.

"I don't think I am," She responded cautiously but honestly to Aris. Like many Jedi, she didn't believe in sparing the youth the truth. She stopped waving her lightsaber around and turned in his direction. She held a far away stare, but could see him clearly. "But I will be. Soon." She said with some hope returning to her face and mind.

The Order's children and teenagers, even ones as tall as Aris, had a way of cheering Ran up through presence alone. Maybe it was the living vicariously. She had not experienced as normal an upbringing as they did, and that was considering a Jedi upbringing was anything but normal.

While her past wasn't normal for a host of other reasons, normalcy came for her now. She knew it as an involuntary chuckle hit her lips courtesy of Connel's silly question. Silly but honest. She did notice Aris was taller, and less gangly than when they'd last met. She'd normally comment on the development but this time she didn't.

"It's good to see you too, Connel, Aris." Ran managed her trained smile. It felt good to smile. Trained or her more natural awkward smile.

"I can talk more about what I'm feeling, if you'd like," She looked to Connel, sensing he might've gone through something similar in his own life. "but first are you alright, Aris?" She deflected, at least for a moment, giving the young Jedi his question back to him.

Aris Noble Connel Vanagor​

 

[Aris Noble]

"I'm still pretty short for my species, Master Vanagor. There's no stretching involved."

Aris chuckled a little as he glanced to Connel, giving him a respectful nod just the same. He did pause though at Ran's question, blinking. "I am, yes. Why wouldn't I be?" For him, he hadn't had anything upsetting as Master Serys seemed to have. He could see it on her face, the trouble she felt. At least talking with him seemed to help.

Even if only a little.

Ran Serys | Connel Vanagor

 

[Connel Vanagor]

​

"In my experience,
when you think you
understand the Force,
you realize just
how little you know"​

[COMM TRAFFIC]
LOCATION : Selvaris | OBJECTIVE : Following the Force |TAG (FRIENDLY) : Ran Serys | Aris Noble

Here I thought he was human…

The exchange between the two told Connel one thing, from his “Guardian” days, she was deflecting. He could be bothered by it, or he could blow it off and go about his own business. Well, he was never good at letting things go, so he was still here. Still though, it was her business, and she had to be the one to let it out. Still though, it was good to actually be talking to people again, he hadn’t done so in a long time (that’s a conversation for another day).

I’m good too, thanks for asking! His tone was snarky and facetious, but his mannerisms clearly meant that he was kidding around, trying to lighten the mood. He still had business to attend to, but that could wait. After all, Exim Panshard's Mask was not just a piece of fabric, it held many secrets and stories, and it was his responsibility to find it. It’s been lost for awhile though, it could be lost a little longer.

So… what are you deflecting from? Want to share or should I continue with the stupid jokes… I mean… I don’t mind doing so… but… There, he went against his better thoughts and came out and said it. I mean, I kept all of my issues in and they just bore at me, and cut me into pieces mentally for a while. It took actually talking to really get past it. Up to you though…

While he may not have come off as serious, what he said though was truthful. It’s funny. Following a path of solitude opened him up to conversation.

​

 

[Sazo Vass]

Under a stormy night, Sazo Vass roared.

Literally.

'THAT WAS...ADEQUATE' , intoned Talion Vass, ancestor spirit within the sword. 'And for him, "adequate", was, "good job",' she thought wryly, surveying the environment, noting that she'd only knocked down a tree or two. A true Bellow could destroy obstacles, alter the very combat environment. Which is why Sazo preferred to practice away from the Enclave, and at night when there weren't people in the way.

Satisfied, Sazo returned to the Enclave, bee-lining it towards the training hall; her blood felt up, and she felt like she could get in practicing a kata or two, get some shut-eye, and still be productive.

She did not expect to have company.

"Master Serys. Master Vanagor", Sazo said, bowing. She turned, looking up at Aris, smiling. "And good to see you", she said to her friend. She turned back to her Master.

"Is everything alright, did I miss something?"

Ran Serys | Connel Vanagor | Aris Noble

 

[Tyrus Vastor]

Tyrus Vastor moved through the temple grounds like a shadow, his presence an unsettling contrast to the serene atmosphere. His gait was smooth but deliberate and devoid of the peaceful grace typical of Jedi. There was no humility or restraint in his posture; instead, his shoulders were slightly hunched, his stance loose but ready, as if expecting conflict at any moment. His eyes, one crimson and one light brown, darted subtly behind red lensed glareshades, scanning his surroundings with cold indifference and predatory awareness of someone accustomed to dangerous environments.

His attire was sleek and tactical, blending functionality with a dark, imposing aesthetic. A choice made out of necessity in his natural environments. He wore a long, black leather trench coat that swept just above the ground, it sported a high collar adding a menace. Beneath the coat, he donned a fitted, sleeveless black vest, reinforced with hidden armor plating that allows for flexibility and protection. His pants are similarly reinforced, made from a durable, matte black fabric that moved with ease and offered further protection.

His boots were rugged, combat-ready, and appeared as though they would make a obvious sound underfoot, They in fact did not. The gloves he wore were black, fingerless, and padded. The korun's hands hovered near his waist, fingers twitching slightly as though expecting the need to draw a weapon, in specific, it was not his lightsaber but a Mandalorian Ripper strapped to his side. It was hinted at a life spent among the criminal underworld. Jedi now dont know how to blend in, true infiltration required sacrifice and I lived with its scars daily. His movements were unhurried yet purposeful, the kind of pace that showed he was in control and there was a quiet arrogance in how he carried himself, as if he owned the space around him and in his eyes he had no reason not to believe that.

Selvaris Enclave. Take care of official business then leave. No need to linger here longer than needed.

Apon entering the training hall, Tyrus's face held a scowl and his glare encompassed everyone with one quick scan. There was no greeting from him or acknowledgement verbally. Just a brow that seemed to raise equally for all. Though his eye did seem to linger slightly longer on Sazo Vass . The young female korun was the one the confirmed to Tyrus that he was in the right place. Then there was Aris Noble . A boy he had met briefly on Taris and a "Master Vanagor" ( Connel Vanagor ) which Tyrus only knew by last name. Only thing was, he didnt know which Vanagor.

So this is Master Serys. Alright.

"Master Serys, need info. Only you got here." He said rather directly as was accustom in korun culture.

Ran Serys

 

[Ran Serys]

"No reason." Ran answered Aris. "I'm -" She hesitated. "I'm just embarrassed. You always seem to find me in a moment of great emotional pain." She admitted. The last time they'd met the situation was much the same. Training, tears, and questions half answered. "I suppose it doesn't help that my way of dealing with problems is to train my way through them." She explained still dancing around her feelings. "I'm not much of a talker." She admitted before Connel continued.

"No. No. I'll share." Ran interrupted Connel's banter, half-smiled and then listened to Connel's words of sincerity. "I will share it, Connel! I just- It's just difficult." Ran spoke energetically, feeling pressured by her fellow knight, but that was good, from time to time Ran needed others to call her out on her behaviors. She valued it. She valued those who would, Connel.

And then there were two more in the Jedi padawan Sazo Vass, Ran's very own pupil, and the Knight Tyrus Vastor. Ran had an audience. Torn between the beautiful feeling of seeing her wonderful padawan and the dreadful experience of sharing feelings and thoughts one was avoiding. "Everything is alright! I'm not alright!" Ran snapped at her padawan's question. Not at her. She would feel enough through the force, but she would also feel her master's pain. They all would. But Sazo specifically would experience the nuance that came with context. Sazo hadn't been selected for Ran's strike force for Sluis Van and Ran was happy she'd chosen to exclude the young woman. Five of the Ten Jedi who accompanied her there died, all more experienced than Sazo, but Ran hadn't talked about the confrontation since it happened.

Tyrus Vastor's words refocused her. She took a deep breath, staring at the taller knight. He was one of Sazo's people but that was about all that Ran knew of him. That and he also knew of the Hidden Enclave on Selvaris. That was enough for her. "I'm having trouble sleeping." She paused. It sounded silly alone. "I am plagued by a nightmare. The same one every time. It haunts me with the days of my youth. Brainwashed and mutated into a slave-soldier for the Sith." She began to unload. "And it teases me even further with failure. I lost five of our fellows against that Dark Pretender that leads the Sith. I fought him. I matched his strength but his bastardization of the force was too strong to overcome. I failed." She shed a few silent tears. They burned her cheeks as they fell.

She explained the nightmare to the Jedi present, every little symbolic detail. "Since the first night I had this nightmare, I've been questioning if I ever really got away from the Sith. This nightmare makes me feel like I'm still under their thumb." She let out a heavy breath that was half sob. "It's not true though. I'm a servant of the light." She said as if it were a mantra. "I'm a servant of the light." She repeated. "I'm a servant of the light." She said one more time before she dropped to her knees. Her saber fell in the mud and she buried her face in her hands.

She felt a moment of ultimate weakness and felt worse letting Sazo and Aris see her like this. But it was the truth. The cold hard truth that even Jedi Knights, no matter how battle hardened or calloused, could doubt themselves and lose themselves to a moment of self pity.

Aris Noble Connel Vanagor Sazo Vass Tyrus Vastor​

 

[Valery Noble]

​

Outfit: Jedi Jumpsuit | Wedding Ring
Weapons: Lightsabers

Valery sat cross-legged at the edge of the temple grounds, her eyes closed and her breathing slow and steady. The Force flowed through her in gentle waves, but even through her deep meditation, she sensed the conversation and training happening not far away. A small group of seasoned and new Jedi exchanged ideas and honed their skills in the courtyard.

But she also felt an undercurrent of more troubling emotions.

Curiosity tugged at Valery's mind, but she resisted the urge to join. For now, it was better to observe from a distance. She could feel the subtle threads of their emotions — the eagerness of the younger Jedi, the patience and wisdom of the older ones, and also the pain from within her friend's heart.

All of these emotions weaved together.

However, when the other Jedi Knight dropped to her knees, Valery felt a surge of concern, instinctively rising to her feet. She remained still, for now, resisting the urge to rush in and interfere, but seeing Ran's vulnerability and hearing her pain made Valery want to help her dear friend.

Open​

 

[Aris Noble]

Oh these were more feelings than he expected. And more people. Aris stood there awkwardly, glancing briefly to the others present, then back to Ran. This wasn't the first time, now that he thought about it, but emotions like this were still too complex, too intense, for him to sort out logically. These dreams and nightmares, he didn't have nightmares himself.

At least there were adults who were willing to help. He'd let them talk.

 

[Connel Vanagor]

​

"In my experience,
when you think you
understand the Force,
you realize just
how little you know"​

[COMM TRAFFIC]
LOCATION : Selvaris | OBJECTIVE : Following the Force |TAG (FRIENDLY) : Ran Serys | Aris Noble | Sazo Vass | Tyrus Vastor | Valery Noble

This sounds familiar…

Folding his arms over each other and looking at the ground for a moment, Connel debated inwardly on whether or not to say anything. He did not know Serys from The Prime Jedi* and it really was her business, but then again, she did speak up about it. Not only that, if his mother were here right now she would be pushing him to recall his own past experiences. After all, just about everything that she was going through now, he was going through not long ago.

My father… he used to have a saying “Sleep and I don’t get along…” it was just the way he lived, he embraced fully what it means to be a "Jedi Guardian", that’s all. The thing is, that was sort of passed on to me not that long ago, in a bad way. Looking up and between her and Aris before giving a nod to the approaching Padawan ( Sazo Vass ). Ever notice how I was never around at social events? I mean, I sat outside at the last charity ball on Hapes and talked to the staff only because they brought me food. I couldn’t talk to anybody out of fear that they thought something of me.

Then another Jedi Knight entered the picture ( Tyrus Vastor ) and just basically commandeered the conversation for himself, so Connel just waited a moment before continuing. I was having nightmares too, constantly… always somehow ended up waking up in the kitchens. All the time I was in firm belief that a Sith was waiting in ambush, and that I was endangering others by being around them. He was of course leaving out that this was a veritable split in his personality, not a “split personality” but two different sides to himself combating each other.

It took me opening up about it, and really getting things out in the open to make any real change. I learned that “the Connel” I used to be was some weird construct in my psyche made of what a “Jedi Guardian” should be… because my father is… and my childhood fear of failure added to it. Opening up made me realize that the Sith I thought that was waiting to ambush was “me” trying to get out of being buried deep down. Master Noble… Glancing at Aris… Your mother…

Glancing back at Ran… She saw something that nudged me out of the path I was on, and now I walk a new path… He shrugged. I guess what I am saying is that you should follow your instincts, but not be afraid to step out of your comfort zone I'm not saying you should do what I did, I mean, at one point I had younglings hiding in their room on "The Prosperity" rather than be in the same corridor as me. Just saying is that it took me being pulled aside to be able to move forward. You are at least doing this on your own.

He wasn't the orator his father was, but hey.... he tried.

*OOC-Note Basically a SW version of the phrase “Don’t know him from Adam”

 

[Sazo Vass]

Sazo blinked, taken aback by her Master's sharp tone. This was...unlike her. Sazo was the one more likely to lose her composure, lose her cool. Master Serys...never.

She continued to think it over, as Master Vanagor consoled her, and Aris...looked uncomfortable. As Ran sank to her knees, Sazo kneeled down with her, holding her hands.

She waited for Master Vanagor to finish speaking, before she began.

"What happened to you- what the Sith did to you- was wrong. They tell such tales of what the Confederacy did to Korun children when they invaded- taking them from their families, twisting them to their will, making them soldiers. But I will tell you something you told me- you made a choice."

"Becoming a Sith is a choice. It is a choice to be selfish, to be cruel, to believe you have the right to dominate, to suborn others to their will. Master Serys, they tried to twist you. They tried to make you into something that you are not. They tried to take that choice from you. But you made a choice to be a Jedi. To be of the Light."

Sazo pulled Ran into an embrace.

"It doesn't mean we won't make mistakes, or fall short. And it doesn't mean we'll always win. But it means we'll fight the battles nobody else can, for everybody. That's what you do, Master. That's what the Sith can't do. And that's what makes us Jedi."

Ran Serys | Connel Vanagor | Aris Noble | Tyrus Vastor

 

[Tyrus Vastor]

It was all inconvenient.

The gathering of all these other jedi, the emotions of Master Ran Serys and the lack of patience I had for it all. I understood it and resented it all at the same time. And though I did not come here to debate, argue or join in with this pity party. I could not help but say my piece and I hoped it would be understood.

" This? Pity?" Tyrus held a scowl and crouched down to Master Serys level from across the training room and felt the mud rise slightly along his boots. His words sounded more like a statement than question. Poised and controlled he removed his glareshades and scanned her with both eyes. I could feel all their feelings rather intensely, amplified through my connection with the force and it tugged at feelings within myself. But I was not dominated by feeling, I dominated it.

With a forceful exhale out his nostrils, he sighed and rolled his eyes.

"I am plagued by a nightmare. The same one every time. It haunts me with the days of my youth. Brainwashed and mutated into a slave-soldier for the Sith." She began to unload. "And it teases me even further with failure. I lost five of our fellows against that Dark Pretender that leads the Sith. I fought him. I matched his strength but his bastardization of the force was too strong to overcome. I failed." She shed a few silent tears. They burned her cheeks as they fell.

She explained the nightmare to the Jedi present, every little symbolic detail. "Since the first night I had this nightmare, I've been questioning if I ever really got away from the Sith. This nightmare makes me feel like I'm still under their thumb." She let out a heavy breath that was half sob. "It's not true though. I'm a servant of the light." She said as if it were a mantra. "I'm a servant of the light." She repeated. "I'm a servant of the light." She said one more time before she dropped to her knees. Her saber fell in the mud and she buried her face in her hands.

" Servant of light." He uttered in his breath softly and then spoke aloud. " Get up Master Serys!"

Sazo pulled Ran into an embrace.

"It doesn't mean we won't make mistakes, or fall short. And it doesn't mean we'll always win. But it means we'll fight the battles nobody else can, for everybody. That's what you do, Master. That's what the Sith can't do. And that's what makes us Jedi."

" Make mistake? Fall short? Fight the battles nobody else can? What wrong, you?" He blinked and continued in Korun. " You talk, Jedi's sworn duty. Protect. Serve everybody. Speak not. You know nothing, little one. This war, there be no victory. Only degrees of defeat." Tyrus shook his head at Sazo. " Know this."

It was like this every time I came across other jedi. The misunderstanding of what being Jedi was and I was sick of it. It was a joke that was romanticied daily by the young and they were ignorant of the consequences. Unprepared for the heartache, the doubt, pain, mental and emotional scars all Jedi had to carry. And carry it alone.

" Jedi protect idea of civilization. Of peace. Not people, not establishments. Not governments. Not friends. Not other jedi. Pelekotan gives, Pelekotan takes. Exact balance."


Tags:
Connel Vanagor
Aris Noble
Valery Noble

 

[Ran Serys]

In one of the lower moments of her life Ran was met with encouragement from a Knight she barely knew. He explained his own struggle and the journey that came with a legacy and the life of a Jedi Knight. Deep down Ran was honored to hear Connel's words, and from that moment on knew that they had endeared him to her. Kinship had begun to pull Ran out of the pit of pity she'd fallen into.

The love and trust between a master and padawan pulled her out of the pit even further. Ran could feel how much Sazo cared for her, as she was wrapped in the young woman's arms. Sazo's words were even stronger as they came mixed with understanding and familiarity. Ran's own words echoed from her student and sent a pulse of awareness in Ran's mind. It was time to make another choice, this time, consciously and defiantly in the face of her struggle. Slowly Ran pulled her head out of her hands and embraced her padawan in return. Ran's mind, body and soul began to light with a new hope for the future.

It was the brutal words of a virtual stranger, a man Ran only knew by name and face, that sealed the pit behind her. Ran felt Tyrus in the force. His way of dealing was just and no less valid than any other Jedi's methods. First in basic and then the tongue of his and Sazo's homeworld, Tyrus spoke. Ran's experience with Korunnal was limited only to what Sazo taught her, but she understood the man. He was sharp, barbed, and rigid, so much so that it was contagious. Ran sharpened. She stood up from her muddy knees and glared at Tyrus.

"You accuse others of knowing nothing, but you have blind spots in what you've forgotten, Master Vastor," Ran informed. "So do I." She admitted. "Sazo, whether she knows it or not, has our blindspots covered. Aris too."

"The young know more of what a Jedi is than us. It is because they look at it everyday, seek to become it, to honor it, and understand it." She gestured at the air between them. "While we seek to understand ourselves, struggle with ourselves. There is only one you, Master Vastor. Only one way to be. The Jedi are not you. We all make it much more." Ran declared confidently, renewed, and ready to make the choice.

"Understand that, and be more patient with the young ones." She said with a gentle strength. "Be more patient with yourself." Ran said more to herself than to him. She needed it more. And he was free to do what he wanted, to be himself. Ran valued that. The New Jedi Order valued that.

Aris Noble Connel Vanagor Sazo Vass Tyrus Vastor​

 

[Sazo Vass]

Sazo stiffened as Master Vastor's words, swallowing the sharp retort. He was likely from one of the backward- sorry, traditional- little Ghôshs that preferred to play with sticks in the mud and relitigate the Summertime Wars, versus attempting to actually better the Korunnai, and join the Al'Har Federation, nascent as it was. She was a Jedi, and also, of Ghôsh Vass. She was about to say as much, before Master Serys pulled herself to her feet and addressed him.

Then she felt as low as pond scum; she couldn't rightly tell this man off, while Master Serys was extolling her virtues. She had to take the high road.

>>Such an...bracing view of what a Jedi is, Master Vastor<<, Sazo finally replied in Korunnal, smiling widely. >>I will go forward, henceforth, with the idea that, at best, we should protect the ideal of civilization and peace, and not actually make the effort to protect things like governments, or my loved ones, or even our fellow Jedi. I will remember that Jedi have no actual agency, and we actually can't do much to effect positive change. And I will certainly carry in my heart, that we can not attain victory, only degrees of defeat. That's absolutely a very healthy outlook! I'm sure you're a credit to your Ghôsh!<<

'...THAT...WAS NOT EVEN REMOTELY THE HIGH GROUND. I DON'T THINK I HAVE THE WORDS TO DEFINE HOW...LOW THAT WAS, YOUNGLING', boomed Talion, ancestor spirit within Talionis, Sazo's blade, amusement in his voice.

Sazo smiled wider, and switched back to Basic. "Well, I will fix some tea for everyone, be back in a moment!"

Sazo flounced away.


Ran Serys | Connel Vanagor | Aris Noble | Tyrus Vastor

 

[Tyrus Vastor]

>>Such an...bracing view of what a Jedi is, Master Vastor<<, Sazo finally replied in Korunnal, smiling widely. >>I will go forward, henceforth, with the idea that, at best, we should protect the ideal of civilization and peace, and not actually make the effort to protect things like governments, or my loved ones, or even our fellow Jedi. I will remember that Jedi have no actual agency, and we actually can't do much to effect positive change. And I will certainly carry in my heart, that we can not attain victory, only degrees of defeat. That's absolutely a very healthy outlook! I'm sure you're a credit to your Ghôsh!<<

I have no Ghôsh. Tyrus reflected within himself. Her words were harsh and I could hope for no less from one of my own. Though the context of what I referred to was seemingly missed or maybe my own words were unclear in direction. Better to address one person at a time than speak to multiple at once.

Either way Tyrus could not help but smile slightly at the young Korun female. Her point was taken and personality stated with clear perceived victory. What was there not to like about that.

"You accuse others of knowing nothing, but you have blind spots in what you've forgotten, Master Vastor," Ran informed. "So do I." She admitted. "Sazo, whether she knows it or not, has our blindspots covered. Aris too."

"The young know more of what a Jedi is than us. It is because they look at it everyday, seek to become it, to honor it, and understand it." She gestured at the air between them. "While we seek to understand ourselves, struggle with ourselves. There is only one you, Master Vastor. Only one way to be. The Jedi are not you. We all make it much more." Ran declared confidently, renewed, and ready to make the choice.

"Understand that, and be more patient with the young ones." She said with a gentle strength. "Be more patient with yourself."

Tyrus looked around the room. He checked his own person and belongings and even looked at everyone else and behind him as Ran Serys continued about the young ones, the struggle of knowing the self and what it meant to be Jedi. The whole time he appeared to be looking for something or someone.

He was waiting for her to be done with it.

I am the last person you will lecture on knowing the self.

" My apologies, Master Serys, But I cannot seem to grasp...who you are talking to." He started the sentence genuinely sincere and with a smile, but that drastically changed in an instant. He leaned in with his right side and approached cautiously, But then he suddenly shifted and turned to his left side and the natural lighting around them shifted on his visage. Revealing a singular ember found in his left eye. No it was his eye. A faint sulfuric glow that stained his being. A sight more than common to those in relation to the darkside of the force. " Because its fo damn sure not me!" His feint of a smile vanished completely and his words came out like a thugs.

His brow raised high as he took her in with a new perspective. "Your words are not my struggle. I ain't the one with sleepless nights and nightmares of being some darkside slave. You never chose the dark. To me your just anothr victim with a shitty hand to play and somehow got better cards. Now you just need to figure out how to play them, cuz you damn sure dont know how after what I just saw."

He spit in front of her and could feel his emotions bubble to the surface.

" I know exactly who and what I am and ive always known. Restraint. Not patience. You never chose and the removal of your choice has traumatized you. You were a victim. But me?" He shook his head and stepped back gritting his teeth. " Sazo was right. Becoming a sith is a choice. A cruel, selfish but also natural one. I chose to be the victimizer, I chose to become sith and then traded in my hand for another and now here I am. Here you are. Here we all are." He adjusted his trenchcoat with both hands as if to shake off the tension and any environmental residue from his clothing.

"Choice.." He repeated and his eyes trailed off to some unseen distance. He took a deep inhale and grounded himself. It was a basic technique taught to younglings to help them find their center of being and Tyrus often used it to temper his innate impulsivities. With each breath his bubbling emotions fell away.

Tags: Ran Serys Sazo Vass Aris Noble Connel Vanagor

 

[Connel Vanagor]

​

"In my experience,
when you think you
understand the Force,
you realize just
how little you know"​

[COMM TRAFFIC]
LOCATION : Selvaris | OBJECTIVE : Following the Force |TAG (FRIENDLY) : Ran Serys | Aris Noble | Sazo Vass | Tyrus Vastor | Valery Noble

Alright, that’s enough. Connel, in a newfound authoritative tone, walked forward. This was definitely not the scarred, scared, Knight who was a sharpening stone for the blade of Darth Kizash , a fight that felt so long ago. Looking between Vaster and Vass, he kept a calm tone, but his wording was clearly of one who was annoyed at where this conversation was beginning to go. Everyone has spoken their peace, and offered their advice, whether solicited or not. You don’t have to agree with each other, but you have to accept where they come from as they offer it. It’s up to Serys whether or not she wants to accept what was given to her. Vass, if you don't respect Vastor’s opinion… you’re not my Padawan, but if you were, I would make sure you respect his station. Just as I would remind Vastor that it is better to keep silent and let others think idly of you than to speak up and validate it.

Cracking his neck, Connel pressed a couple of buttons on his vambrace before speaking up again. Who am I, though? Just some lost soul who can’t figure out his place in the galaxy. The smirk was not one of sadness, or sarcasm, but of genuine self deprecating humor. Then finally looking Serys’ way he asked…

I’m on an assignment out towards the Rim. I need some supplies. Could I grab a few things I thought I had?