No Backward Glances

[Lief]

The games we've played 'til now are at an end...​

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Sarkany - The Paxe System​

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She had spent most of the journey from Mirial unconscious. When her eyes eventually opened to the glare of the artificial medbay lights Kyra could not help but wince. A dull throbbing worked its way through her mind, pulsating at the temples paying increasing attention to the lefthand side. That half of her vision, too, seemed blurred in comparison to the right... As though it remained unwilling to fully open.

When she had tried to sit up she had found herself restrained against the medical bed, and it wasn't for another large leg of the journey that she was released from those binds. Screw was nowhere to be seen, no doubt fulfilling his duty and piloting the ship in her absence. By contrast, however, Kyne had not once left her side.

Her first steps after what felt like an eternity laying down were uneasy, painful, yet she had pushed on regardless much to the medical droids disdain. It wasn't until she had tumbled down to the floor and tried to catch herself that the realization sunk in. It hadn't been some delirious vision or dream... Kyra Sol was indeed missing her left arm, from the elbow down.

That had made her sick to her core. She had been transported back to her bed - ironically by one of the cargo lifters usually down in the mechanics bay - and had spent the remainder of the journey in shock.

Who knew how long had passed planet side. No calls had come through in that time, and it wasn't until she was back on her feet once the ship had landed that she realized her commlink had been absolutely obliterated. What else would she expect from falling a total of five stories? Albeit in increments, but still.

Several days had passed on Sarkany since they had descended to the moon. Try as she might she could not adjust to having just one usable arm... Not least because that too had been injured and was bandaged up making ordinary tasks a chore.

Her left had been her dominant. Now she was without. She couldn't work to take her mind off things, she couldn't go more than three feet across the ship without the medical droids stern voice telling her to take it easy. It was infuriating.

But at least she was far away from the public eye. At least there was no Ignus or Connor here to see what a mess she had become. To Lord over her, or tell her what a fool she had been. Would he be angry that she hadn't secured his lightsaber? Frustrated that she had been so weak that she hadn't even been able to survive a run in with a Sith?

She had to leave her ship, she had to get outside and breathe the fresh air, but she couldn't face the world that she and he had explored. Why had Screw brought her back here of all places?

 

[Connor Harrison]

Silver Jedi Temple
Voss, Voss System

Connor ran his fingers through his hair and sat on the edge of his bunk fresh from the shower. Picking up his com from the side table, he scrolled to Kyra's signal and sent out message.

"Kyra. When you get this can you let me know please. You've not been here for days and I'm starting to get worried. I'll give you 24 hours."

Tossing it to the side, he leant back on his elbows and sighed. He glanced out of the window to his right over the gardens.

Had the horrors of war been too much? Seeing the effects of what the Sith could do first person via his wound? The Silver dominions? The shockwave of Korriban? She never wanted to be part of the Jedi - he had pushed and pushed. Now he'd probably scared her away.

Tapping his fingers, he sat up and stood, going to finish drying himself and thinking what he had to take on today. He'd never been so busy, and it was annoying she didn't think about returning his communicae at all.

[member="Kyra Sol"]

 

[Lief]

Completely oblivious to the attempted communications, Kyra stood just before the ramp which - when descended - would open into the greater moon beyond her ship. One of the medical droids was right behind her, much to her frustrations, and Kyne was at her side, yet for all the staring she did she could not quite bring herself to press the button which released the hatch.

"When did I become such a coward?"

For all she knew the monster, Ignus, was waiting for her outside. Or worse yet Connor himself. She could not face either. The humiliation of what had happened, the realization that she had failed in so many ways... No. No she would remain inside. She couldn't do this.

Turning she pushed past the stupid pestering droid and hurried back toward the medical bay before the damn droid had an aneurysm.

"Why the kriff are we still on Sarkany? Bloody well tell Screw to get his act together and take us back home."

Where was home though? Jakku? Voss? This is the closest you've had to a home since Jakku... And Jakku wasn't even a home it was a safe house. Was that why he had brought her here of all places?

But there were too many reminders of her stupidity. Of what she had likely lost during her first Sith encounter.

She looked toward the ruined commlink. If she tried hard enough she knew that she could fix it, but part of her didn't want to. The only person who would use it to contact her was the one who was going to be most disappointed.

Maybe even angry.

[member="Connor Harrison"]

 

[Connor Harrison]

Silver Jedi Temple
Voss, Voss System

With his trousers and vest on, Connor did the usual routine. Checking over each scar, remebering what it meant and when he had got it.

The burns on his back looking like Beggars Canyon. Burns on his knuckles from the Force Lightning. A mangled scar on his arm and indents on his torso from Ord Mantell. The odd mark here and there. And then, under the left eye, the newest addition to the collection from Matsu Xiangu.

Looking into the mirror, he inspected it. Blinking a few times, it had near enough healed, but was never going to be perfect. It was always slightly itchy, tender and softer than the skin gluing to it. Thank god he even had his eye.

Still. He was alive. That's what he told himself. He lived to learn, to tell the tale, and help others.

Slicking back his hair, shaving the edge of his beard and splashing water over his face, he walked back out to check the com. Nothing.

Connor shook his head and went for a drink of blue milk. She was so self-centered when things didn't suit her. Hiding away, retreating. Never talking it out or asking for help. She was probably sulking somewhere, or back on Jakku, or...somewhere else.

[member="Kyra Sol"]

 

[Lief]

"Ah, Mistress Kyra... It is time we discussed your cybernetic options..."

She had been sat staring out of the viewing port for the better part of an hour now, watching as the birds flocked overhead before vanishing into the distance. Rain began to fall, which was a really strange thing to witness, as though she had stepped into a refresher yet remained dry. She didn't bother turning toward the medical droid with its monotonous tone. Honestly, who thought such a vocal box would be comforting to patients?

As the silence dragged on, the medical droid simply continued to stare at the back of her head...

"Did you hear me, Mistress?"

Kyra grunted, and waved her good hand toward the droid in a dismissive gesture.

"Not now" she said, her voice barely above a whisper. She didn't want to have to think about it. She was too busy worrying over what she was going to tell Connor... If she was going to tell Connor. She had managed to hide away in the Galaxy before now, she could do so again right?

No more disappointing him. No more frustrating him. He'd be free from the burden of the stupid mechanic he'd found so long ago.

"You can't just keep running Kai... So you lost one battle, maybe that just means you have to try harder... Actually learn, instead of rejecting it?"

Swallow her pride, take whatever verbal beating she received. Whatever scorn she was shown for the injuries she could not hide despite the fact that she truly wished she could.

Looking down to her hand she noticed that the blood was seeping through the bandage again. Damn the odd shaped wound. Best she go get her bandages changed again...

[member="Connor Harrison"]

 

[Connor Harrison]

Silver Jedi Temple
Voss, Voss System

If there was one thing Connor Harrison didn't like, it was people as stubborn as he. He'd met many people who tested his patience over the years and thankfully many had since left. But now Kyra Sol was getting to that level of annoying him. Why wasn't she contacting him?

She never did anything to warrant a dangerous situation - hell, the girl didn't even know how to swim a while ago or what a fish was - so she couldn't be going about on same damn foolish crusade.

He was dressed for the morning run and a visit to the Ranger station for work on his new armour after the humiliation of Korriban's duel. He walked to the door.

He stopped. Turned. Shook his head.

He walked back to the bunk and picked up the com. The signal was open; no message.

"You've not even got 24hrs. I don't hear from you in 2 hours I'm coming for you. Voss-ka. Sarkany. Jakku. The only places you know. I'll find you, you bloody idiot."

He threw it down again and walked out, leaving it beeping gently on the pillow in the hope something came through by the time he got back. If not? Time to go Sol hunting.

[member="Kyra Sol"]

 

[Lief]

"This is why you were told to take it easy!"

Kai hadn't realized just how many damn wounds her body was sporting. It wasn't as if the ship had mirrors everywhere, and everything hurt. Needless to say it was more than her hands dressing which needed changing. How she had ever managed to get away from Ignus she didn't know. In fact the whole final stage of their encounter was blurry in her mind.

"I didn't even do anything" she grumbled, wincing as the stupid droid poked and prodded at all the tender spots. She had chosen a crew of droids to avoid this sort of thing, usually they were quiet and just kept to themselves, did their duty without butting in, but apparently things had gotten bad enough on Mirial that they had all but performed a mutiny!

At least if I had chosen a crew of people I could smash'em on the nose to stop them from ordering me around!

She had always been a bad patient. Too much energy, too little love of lying around doing nothing all day. Today especially she wanted to get away from her mind, sink her teeth into some real work or exploration, but she couldn't. She was stuck in these damn four walls of the medbay... Stupid Screw had even ordered one of her bulwarks to guard the entrance... Against her!

Her gaze lingered back to the broken commlink which was set on a sidetable, beneath which the bloody remnants of her clothes lay. Thank the Force she hadn't been wearing her good stuff on Mirial... Then again, if she had perhaps she wouldn't have lost her arm.

Pushing back to her feet, feeling the glare of the med-droid on her back, Kyra plucked up the hunk of metal and wires and took it over to the corner desk. It wasn't meant for the dirty work of a mechanic, but it would do.

Were they forgetting that this was her ship?

[member="Connor Harrison"]

 

[Connor Harrison]

Silver Jedi Temple
Voss, Voss System

The Jedi Master stood at the foot of a large table, strewn with blue-prints, tools and ammunition. Above the table rotated his new armour, crimson and silver. Perfect. He stood under it, looking up, arms folded and hand gently stroking his beard as the Ranger, Gerard, went over the details in a side room in the large hangar.

He was one of Matsu’s many hands in working on new gear and tech for the Silver Jedi, and Connor desperately needed an upgrade from what he made himself. It was good, but it wasn’t great. These guys were bred for battle and knew what they were doing.

”Heavy duty. Built in weapons and flight system including a beamer and ionic disrupter.” Gerard looked to Connor.”And force crystal shot. You’ll be a war machine in this think, and it’s about time you got rid of that tin-pot armour you had. This is Shadow stuff. Top gear.”

Connor raised his brow in submission and shrugged.

"I get quite partial to my old habits. Thank you, Gerard. If this is all set, I want this locked down in the Shadow room assigned to me." He pushed himself off from the table and walked by the Ranger, patting him on the shoulder as he did. "Now go invent something destructive will you – stop standing around talking to me."

He left the hangar bay to head back to his quarters; he had been less than an hour in total with the run and meeting with Gerard. Safe to say Kyra was on his mind and he hoped that com had a message when he got back.

[member="Kyra Sol"]

 

[Lief]

"Oh, blast it!"

A grunt of frustration was matched by her sudden push back from the desk as she turned and tossed her sonic servodriver across the room. She didn't even bother to make note of where it landed, instead she grit her teeth and glared around the room.

It was too tricky, too finicky... There hadn't been a time in her life since she was a child first learning the ropes that Kyra had been unable to fix something she put her mind to, nevermind a device as simple as a commlink, yet here she was struggling with this most basic of tasks.

"Damn it all to Chaos! Screw you stupid bucket of bolts, get your metal ass in here!"

That was it! She wasn't going to let these stupid crewmates of hers take her for a ride any longer. This was her damn ship! She may have lost her arm, but that didn't take away from the fact that she was Captain here, not Screw.

"Can't fix or work, can't leave the damn medbay, my bloody crew won't even listen to me!"

When had things gotten so bloody ridiculous here on the Bucket?

[member="Connor Harrison"]

 

[Connor Harrison]

Silver Jedi Temple
Voss, Voss System

Still nothing.

No communication in a week.

This was worrying.

Connor dressed in his tunic and nothing more – his weapon by his side and that’s all. The belts tight across his waist and his sleeves rolled up. Taking the com, he left his quarters at once to go find her. No other Silver Jedi needed to know – most were off world anyway tidying up the Hast affair, and while he had been based at the Temple, he was one of few still here.

Retracing steps back to the hangar, he moved quickly and activated his ship from afar with the com signal, and the cargo ramp lowered for him to enter and prepare for flight.

Sitting down and firing up the engines, waiting for the Ranger authority to guide him out so not to take-off into an incoming ship, he brought up the log for Jakku and Sarkany. Eyes darting over both, he lingered on Jakku where she lived.

Connor paused and rememeberd her wonderful, honest reaction to the lagoon and the clearing on Sarkany they had found weeks ago. That was a place full of life and colour, and a world away from the danger and pain of Jakku.

He targeted Sarkany, which wouldn’t take him long to reach at all. The Ranger signalled him clear to leave, and steadily guiding the ship out, he roared up and away at a steady speed from the Temple to the atmosphere where he gunned the engines at full throttle.

A sinking feeling hit him. He hoped to god she was here – otherwise he would know she was in grave danger.

Or worse.

[member="Kyra Sol"]

 

[Lief]

"Oiy! Listen to me you clanker, stop chewing the luna-weed and let me out of this damn room!"

Before her the battle droid did absolutely nothing... Didn't shift, didn't look down at her, didn't respond. Instead its hulking frame remained slap bang in the middle of the doorway.

"Move out of the way, before I pump you full of plasma! Don't think I won't! I can buy more of you damn stupid lead headed idjits!"

It wasn't until she reached down to her belt that she realized both it and the things usually upon it - namely her blasters - were missing. What the kriff?

"Screw! You stupid scraphead, I know you can hear me! When I get out of here, you're in big freaking poodoo!"

She turned and ran straight into one of the medical droids. Chaos was this room driving her nuts!

"The sooner you rest and heal, the sooner you can leave, Mistress. This is for your own good."

When Droids become self aware... Ugh. Maybe it was time to invest in a real crew!

[member="Connor Harrison"]

 

[Connor Harrison]

Outer Sarkany
Paxe System

Less than half-an hour it took to reach Sarkany at full speed.

Connor had to remember the direction to their lagoon retreat, and thankfully the log was easy to follow and minutes later he was circling. Her ship was beside the lagoon.

A big grin crossed his face, and a relieved breath. So much so he let his head loll and a swell of emotion bubbled up. The thought she was dead somewhere…well, that wasn’t even a thought now.

"You’re so predictable Miss Sol. You’ve got some explaining to do before I decide to kick you out of the Order for being too stubborn.”

He smirked at the transmission sent to her ship, and he set about hovering to find a space for his ship as hers had taken up the usual spot – a little out of the way, but he would land in good time.

He couldn’t wait to see what she’d been doing.

[member="Kyra Sol"]

 

[Lief]

Resistance, it seemed, was futile. One way or another the so called medics had set her back into the bed where she had naught but her thoughts for company. Kyne had even been shooed out after her attempt at leaving the ship several hours ago. Not even the pup was here!

Though she was exhausted, Kyra was using every fiber of her being, every inch of her willpower, to remain awake. Every time her eyes shut for more than a second she could see him looming over her, two signs of her failure in his grasp. The lightsaber she had sought to reclaim, and the arm she had lost in her futile attempts.

Kyra jumped, jolted from her thoughts as the distinct sound of an engine zipped overhead. She couldn't for the life of her think why that would be so odd a sound, yet it had roused her all the same.

Shifting her feet over the edge of the bed, she frowned. Sark was uninhabited... That was the reason she'd chosen this world when she and Connor were exploring. So why was it she had heard a ship?

"Really, Mistress? You simply must stop trying to get up!"

"Hush" she said, not unkindly but with a tone that brokered no leeway. "Don't you hear that?"

Another second passed, and the rumbling was gone... Yet the sound of it stuck with her all the same.

"Are you sure we're on Sarkany?"

The droids affirmation of their location made the pit in her stomach deepen. What if Ignus had followed them? She rose up, and glanced around the room. Her belongings had to be here somewhere.

"Where did you put my gunbelt?"

[member="Connor Harrison"]

 

[Connor Harrison]

He wasn’t going to run through the outcropping of jungle like a lunatic to the lagoon. She was here, and that was fine. Connor walked carefully, brushing the thorns out of the way and stepping over the vines until the blue lagoon could be seen through the trunks and her mighty ship overlooking it.

Looking from left to right, she wasn’t to be seen and not even doing her swimming.

For a second, he frowned and looked a little closer through the water itself – nothing.

Again – the thought she’d pushed herself and drowned. Shaking his head, he blew some air to take the horrid thought and shouted.

"KYRA!”

He sauntered around the lagoon to her ship, looking around for any sign of life, waiting for her to come charging out of the jungle or jump down from her ship or come out carrying a fish from the depths. Who knew.

Coming to the side of her ship, he glanced up at it and moved to the rear and banged on the hull.

"Hello?!”

He banged again and stepped back. If she wasn’t there, then he’d have to make off around the immediate area or simply wait. If she was exploring she may not be back until sunset.

[member="Kyra Sol"]

 

[Lief]

As she moved around the room she had no luck locating her gunbelt... However, as she neared her ruined clothes she began to feel the self same sickening sensation which had been present when she stole Ignus' lightsaber from him.

Lowering down she rummaged through the pile until her hand clasped around the hilt. It sent a horrible feeling shooting all the way through her, and the pain of her unhealing hand seemed to likewise intensify. But she kept hold of it anyway.

From outside a muffled shout could be heard, and then a series of almost taunting knocks against the durasteel hull.

This was it. The Mirialan had found her, come to finish the job.

Storming over to where the bulwark was waiting, Kyra ignited the horrible red blade and made her demands for it to step aside. Surprisingly this proved enough for the idiot to listen to her, as though she needed a hilt to sound serious!

Kyne was waiting outside the door, and together they made it toward the ramp. Pushing the button proved a difficult task with her only hand preoccupied, yet she managed it with the base of the lightsaber and as it began to descend she stepped back into the shadows of the hallway.

Her breathing was heavy, her legs felt like jelly, yet she stood her ground and waited. Waited for Ignus to appear, waited to ambush him before he could cause any more damage.

She could already feel the adverse effects of the strain and the stress though. Her left eye was almost completely closed and her head pulsed and ached unbearably. Just a few more moments... That's all she needed...

[member="Connor Harrison"]

 

[Connor Harrison]

"Hello?!”

He waited….and waited….and eventually the ramp began to lower with a whirr of mechanics.

But immediately something was off – the crimson glow was evident. Connor knew it! He snapped his hilt into his hand and shot the blue blade out with a violent snap-hiss, arched behind him in his right hand and left hand out ready to repel the bastard inside.

He crouched, ready to move, and then the figure was evident.

Connor took a moment for his face to soften as he took her in.

Kyra was stood holding a crimson lightsaber, not his blue one, with her left arm gone, and a streak of burnt flesh running up her face all illuminated by the hellish saber.

Inside, his heart raced and he felt it thump against his ribs. He killed the saber and let it drop to the grass.

Was this really her…no….no…..

"Kyra…”

…he walked to the ramp, left hand still out, slowly turning to offer his palm to her to take.

She had been mutilated. She had been ravaged. She could have been corrupted. The bile rose in Connor’s throat and he kept as calm as he could.

"Kyra…take my hand…I’m here….”

A few smaller steps, one over the other, half-way up the ramp.

He could see her more, and his eyes brimmed with painful tears.

Not her. Not her....

[member="Kyra Sol"]

 

[Lief]

The snap hiss, the blue glower which fought for dominance against the red, it was too much. It had to be Ignus, taunting her with Connor's lightsaber yet again. She exhaled a sharp breath and tried to steady her hand, but it was almost impossible. She couldn't see him, and her mind was too abuzz for her to sense him, but she knew it had to be him.

Damn Screw for bringing them back to Sark!

She took a few steps back into the room as the light neared, footsteps moving up the ramp. By now her breathing wasn't even evident as she held her breath and waited, until the anticipation was almost painful.

"Stay back, you sick bastard" she said, with all the ferocity of a kitten due to the warble of her voice.

But when the figure came into view she noticed something odd... The individual did not have green skin, and the height was off. Kyra blinked, and felt her eyes well with tears, much to the stinging discomfort of her left. The blue hue was gone, quickly followed by the red as she disignited Ignus' blade and threw it aside.

"Connor..?" she breathed, never before having experienced relief like it. In that moment she forgot all her concerns about contacting him, the loss of his lightsaber, her stupidity when facing the Sith, and simply gave in to the duplicitous sensation of sorrow and relief.

She sunk to her knees, completely ignorant of the offered hand, and used her good arm to cover her face. As though allowing him to see her in such a state would only weaken her further. Her shoulders shook silently, before she mumbled her almost inaudible apologies.

Had she really just almost attacked him?

[member="Connor Harrison"]

 

[Connor Harrison]

The saber cut out and dropped, and so did she in a weak state.

Connor ran up to her and took her in his arms. He collapsed down on his knees and lay her back gently, cradling her.

He didn’t even know he was crying – the tears just rolled down the right side of his face. The left duct was damaged. Blood slowly formed on the lip of his eye instead of tears. A horrid side effect that he didn’t even know about for not crying.

"Ssh, it’s alright. It’s alright,” he was in autopilot mode. "Let me see, it’s alright.”

Looking down her body, it was an automatic sweep to check her state. Her legs were both in one piece. Her left arm was gone and already crudely bandaged. Right arm fine. Breathing staggered. Lightsaber wound on her left side, from the eye to her scalp.

"Bring me some gauze!” Connor shouted to the droids.

He stroked her hair, placing his left hand on her chest, feeling her heart beat, pushing out as much as he could to boost her aura. To give her strength. Warmth.

"It’s alright,” he said to himself as well as his wounded friend.

Leaning in, he kissed the back of her head gently, hearing her whimpering and feeling her spiking temperature. He closed his eyes and pressed his face into her hair and seethed with rage.

"I’m here.”

[member="Kyra Sol"]

 

[Lief]

What she had hoped to be a moment of solitary grief turned into an embrace between friends who had been through so much together already. There was no hesitation from him, and while she had initially sought to keep it to herself her whole body relaxed against the warmth of his when he pulled her back against him. Her silent shakes became quiet whimpers as it became ever harder to keep her grief inward, it was impossible to do so for long when another was sharing in it.

His voice was soothing yet in many ways demanding, as though he had turned from Connor the friend into Connor the first aider. Her hands slowly moved away from her face, though she did not look him in the eye or anywhere close to, the tears still falling yet her inconsolable state a little less apparent as the seconds ticked by. All she felt by this point was fatigue and numbness, as though it had all been washed from her.

Whatever he saw mustn't have been good; Kyra had no idea what he must have noticed on her face, she hadn't had access to a mirror to know, yet it was exactly there that he was looking when he called for further gauze. She was tired, so very tired, and she was fighting to keep her eyes open. Once he was done yelling to the medical droids she lowered her head down from his view to rest against his shoulder.

As back on Mirial, right now she could feel the black folds of unconsciousness creeping in.

She was not permitted her respite, though, as something seemed to stem from Connor into her core, booning her waning strength. She shivered, and grasped his wrist with her hand in an attempt at keeping him close.

The medical droids did not take long to arrive, they had already been on pins from the moment she left the medical bay and were more than anxious to have her carted back to bed. But despite the state she was in, despite the spiking fever and the fatigue, she clung onto Connor for dear life.

"Don't go..."

Would he know? Would he realize how foolish she had been?

[member='Connor Harrison']

 

[Connor Harrison]

"You'll be ok sweetheart. Just try regulate your breathing. Embrace my aura. Relax."

He looked over her facial wound - that was a lightsaber burn if ever he'd seen one. In fact he'd given one similar by accident in a training exercise with Keira Ticon nearly a year ago. He gently peeled her strands of burnt hair from the wound, dry blood and skin making him work carefully. Her eye was closed now and swollen, but hopefully she hadn't lost sight in it. Only time would tell.

Taking his hand from her chest, he held it over her wound and closed his eyes and used his healing ability to help begin the process of fusing the burnt skin together and repair the muscle; however it felt the dead cells and the damage caused. This was going to leave a nasty scar, and a section of her hair would be missing where the burn stopped.

He squeezed his eyes shut and curled his hand into a fist, tighter and tighter, letting out a vent of frustrated anger for a few seconds, and a hiss of breath came out of his lips.

"Who did this."

It's all he needed to know. The rest would come later when she had rested and healed.

He stroked the un-burnt side of her brow and rocked gently.

[member="Kyra Sol"]