First Reply Of Scars Earned

[Gatz Derrevar]

Ship: The Red Night
Equipment: Jedi Robes | Lightsaber
Tag: Open to Jakku Jedi

If at all possible, Gatz would recommend that his patients avoid being filled with shrapnel.

It was mid-morning in the Jakku Jedi Enclave, and Gatz was busying himself with, well, himself. Coruscant had left many scars behind, mental, emotional, and physical. Gatz rather thought he had a handle on those first two for once in his life, but it was the third one—the physical scars that he was having trouble with today. Because much like the ecumenopolis itself, he too had been thoroughly wrecked in the siege.

Fourteen incisions. Fourteen pieces of metal that had been pulled out of him, as he'd bled out in a makeshift trauma center after the battle. Fourteen sutures, fourteen different pains for him to feel, and fourteen different bandages to change.

So if anyone walked into the medbay at this moment, hopefully they'd understand that was why he was shirtless and sitting on a medical bed, gauze and tape at his side.

As a general rule, Gatz Derrevar did not take off his shirt. Not anywhere someone might walk in on him. That wasn't always the case: there'd been a time when he'd felt no shame in letting someone see him that vulnerable. That time when all he'd cared about was credits, and the next shipment of spice he was to deliver. But then he'd met Valery, and he'd changed his mission from making money to doing better.

And with that decision had come great suffering.

The evidence was bared to be seen: scars wrapped around his torso like he was a human jigsaw puzzle. His abs were hidden under a thick layer of scar tissue, a gross mixture that had been inflicted by blasters, alien tiger claws, and more blasters. His sternum was no better, a thick, angry red scar having blossomed and branched out to his collar and underneath his ribcage. The long, jagged scar on his right shoulder, trailing down under his arm.

And then there were all the new ones, four little incisions hidden under gauze that dotted his torso, the remnants of the shrapnel that had been dug out of his skin. It was these bandages, yellowed with pus, that Gatz was currently trying to change before anyone could see him like this. He should have done this back on his ship if he didn't want to be spotted, but the medbay at the enclave was far bigger, and far better stocked.

So, Gatz had thrown caution to the wind, and attempted to care for himself here. Which, of course, could only end with someone walking in on him.

 

[Cortana Jade]

JAKKU JEDI ENCLAVE

A lone figure, with an air of familiarity sauntered through the corridors, her silhouette a dark smear against the backdrop of a place she'd forsaken a long time ago -- against her will.

Memories of her mother constantly flashed through her mind—her unwavering strength. They were bittersweet, filling Cortana with both warmth and a hollow ache.

Cortana reached up to rub her temples, the dull throb of a migraine gnawing at her. These headaches had become a constant companion since her mother's passing, a cruel reminder of her own telepathic abilities. It was as if the universe itself was mourning with her, the pain an echo of her grief. She knew she had to find relief soon, or the migraines would incapacitate her completely.

The med bay was just ahead, its cold metal walls a stark contrast to the sun-baked desert outside. As she stepped inside, the temperature dropped noticeably, different from other areas of the enclave, likely for sterile purposes. The room was dimly lit, the faint hum of machinery the only sound. She moved with a sense of purpose, though her body ached with fatigue -- anything else could wait.

When she barged in she saw a shirtless man sitting on a medical bed, gauze and tape at his side. She glanced over, but her pacing never stopped, "Sorry, I'll be out of your way in a sec-gotta grab something."

She slid into one of the side storage rooms, without even thinking she went after her objective and then...Cortana's reflection stared back at her from a mirror, her eyes shadowed with exhaustion and sorrow. She looked so much like her mother, especially at this age, it was almost unbearable. The same sharp features, the same determined set of her jaw. She reached into a cabinet, her fingers trembling slightly, and retrieved a small vial of medication. The pills clinked softly as she poured a few into her palm.

Swallowing the pills dry, she leaned against the counter, closing her eyes and willing the pain to subside. The med bay's cool air was a balm on her flushed skin, but it did little to ease the storm raging in her mind. The weight of her responsibilities pressed down on her, heavy and unyielding. She was here to continue her training, to honor her mother's legacy, but the path ahead seemed more daunting than ever.

And she hadn't even had the chance to really talk to Lossa Aureus and Briana Sal-Soren or Kaleleon

As the medication began to take effect, the sharp edge of the migraine dulled, receding to a manageable ache. Cortana took a deep breath, steadying herself.

Walking back out, "Sorry for just barging in on you like that."

----

Gatz Derrevar

 

[Gatz Derrevar]

Ship: The Red Night
Equipment: Jedi Robes | Lightsaber
Tag: Cortana Jade

"Sorry, I'll be out of your way in a sec-gotta grab something."

Gatz jolted, like a womprat in a spotlight. He attempted to cover up, except there was nothing to cover up with. His robes were draped over the other end of the medical cot, and were simply out of reach. Dammit! He knew doing this in here was stupid. It was a community medbay, and Jakku's students had plenty of reason to visit it—hell, sunburn was reason enough to visit it.

He looked up, about to apologize for... for something.

And froze. For a half a moment, Gatz swore he was looking Romi Jade in the flesh. Joy and relief crashed into him, only to near immediately be replaced with grief and despair. Because the woman before him, for all she looked like Master Jade, simply wasn't her. She was too youthful. Master Jade hadn't been old by any means, but she'd been mature.

But, by the Force, the young woman in front of him could have been her younger doppelganger. She passed him entirely, making a beeline for the storage closet at the back of the medbay. Gatz was too stunned to stop her—not that he wouldn't have let her pass, but simply because he'd just organized the supply closet and wanted to ask her to keep it organized.

Did Romi have a daughter?

Gatz riffled through knowledge that wasn't his. As time passed, the finer details of the memories Briana had unintentionally imprinted upon his mind had begun to fade—but the most important anecdotes were as clear as ever. It took all of two seconds to come up with a name: Cortana Jade.

Yes. Romi did have a daughter.

And then Cortana was back, apologizing for bursting into the medbay—into her mother's medbay. Gatz could only gawk like an idiot. What was he supposed to say to her? Offer his condolences? Tell her how much she looked like her mother? Accept her apology? Apologize himself?

"Don't, uh, mention it," he said slowly, eyes still wide as if he couldn't believe he was staring a younger Romi in the face, "I... don't think we've met before. Gatz Derrevar, Jedi Knight."

He was still naked from the waist up. He really ought to, like, cover himself up. But Gatz was frozen solid, unable to move as a wall of conflicting emotions slammed into him.

 

[Cortana Jade]

She winced a bit, visibly squinting as his initial thoughts flooded her own -- she didn't want this migraine medicine to go to waste.

She threw her hand up in surrender, a white flag in this mental warfare thing, "Yeah I get that a lot-she and I looking alike. I've seen it more and more recently I guess-." she wasn't intending to be intrusive, but the mental blocks her mother put on her to experience a more natural progression into her abilities were broken or something -- she was mentally barraged with everything, everywhere all the time now...especially when it came to thoughts on her mother...

"My mom I mean...Romi was my mother." she explained.

That's why she'd shied away from socializing much since she came back to Jakku. She needed to recalibrate...this taking precedence, she really hadn't grieved yet.

"Don't, uh, mention it," he said slowly, eyes still wide as if he couldn't believe he was staring a younger Romi in the face, "I... don't think we've met before. Gatz Derrevar, Jedi Knight."

She inhaled, "I'm Cortana. Nice to meet you..." she exhaled over her words.

"Are you uhm-" She motioned with her hands over his current physical situation, "Do you just sit about shirtless like this often or?" She chortled.

"Are you okay-like seriously?" She could see he was clearly bandaging himself up.

Gatz Derrevar

 

[Gatz Derrevar]

Ship: The Red Night
Equipment: Jedi Robes | Lightsaber
Tag: Cortana Jade

"Yeah I get that a lot-she and I looking alike. I've seen it more and more recently I guess-."

Gatz blinked for a moment, confused. He hadn't said or insinuated that Cortana looked like her mother at all. He'd thought it, of course, but surely she wasn't in his mind—

Was she reading his surface thoughts right now? That... that had to be the answer, right? Gatz hadn't heard of Jedi who were able to do that without digging into someone's mind, but then, the Force was a mysterious, esoteric thing. And he certainly didn't have a complete knowledge of what it was capable of allowing a Jedi to do.

There was something more important than Cortana's cool abilities though: the loss of her mother. That was a pain Gatz was intimately familiar with, having lost his own only a month ago.

"She was a wonderful woman," Gatz said softly, "and I'm grateful to have gotten to meet her."

Gatz left it at that though. He knew all too well how "condolences" quickly grew old, and instead of being comforting, could become a reminder of the pain. So he let Cortana change the subject. Besides, she had a valid question. It was kind of weird for a man to be in the medbay, alone, sitting on a cot while shirtless.

"I try to keep my shirt on most of the time," Gatz promised with an easy smile, "I took a pretty good beating during the Battle of Coruscant. Fourteen surgical incisions to pull shrapnel out of my body. I was just changing the bandages."

But, with that done, Gatz did finally reach for his robes to wrestle himself into them.

 

[Cortana Jade]

She nodded with a slight, asymmetric smile with an expression of deep sadness pasted over the top. She was pretty great, both of her parents were...she couldn't think of one and not think of the other; they were very much a unit. Losing them both in the same year so suddenly was...

She leaned back, perching up against the wall, arms folded.

"Yeah, she was pretty awesome. Seems like I'm meeting new people all the time who've been touched by her in some way. It helps knowing she's had such reach-I mean I guess I always knew who she was..." She said, "But now I'm really learning who she was."

"I took a pretty good beating during the Battle of Coruscant. Fourteen surgical incisions to pull shrapnel out of my body. I was just changing the bandages."

Her head whipped around, she shot a quick glance over at Gatz like she had a sudden intuitive grasp of reality. Pushing back off the wall, "Wait-you were there-on Coruscant?"

"Fourteen surgical incisions? Feth..." That'd explain the bandages. "What happened there? Di-did you see my mom?"

----

Gatz Derrevar

 

[Gatz Derrevar]

Ship: The Red Night
Equipment: Jedi Robes | Lightsaber
Tag: Cortana Jade

Romi certainly had been something else. Some part of Gatz would always regret that he'd never gotten the chance to truly get to know her. She had breezed in and out of his life, leaving behind a single lesson, and a myriad of "what ifs." It was more painful than it should have been. He felt more grief than he thought he ought to—and this time he couldn't blame that on Briana's emotional state, not when he was no longer privy to her mind as he'd once been.

No, the hollow feeling that Romi had left behind in his chest was his, and his alone.

"I had hoped to return here to train under her, once the war was over." Gatz admitted, "but what little she did teach me will stay with me for the rest of my days. I suspect the many Jedi who did get the chance to train under her feel the same."

But then the conversation shifted to Coruscant, and the invasion. Cortana seemed to take a sudden interest, not in his injuries, but in her mother's demise. In a way, he understood her morbid curiosity: his own father had been murdered, off-world, when he was a teenager. He knew what it was, to need answers; to need to know the whole story.

He'd never gotten it, himself. And, unfortunately, he couldn't provide it for Cortana.

"I wasn't with her during the battle," Gatz said softly, sorrow lacing his tone, "I was at the base of the Temple. I believe she was near the top. But I felt her become one with the Force. I... Cortana, if you're looking for hope that she survived somehow, I'm sorry. She didn't."