Pizza Bank

[Ugohr Poof]

The deal on Susefvi was dragging on, but there was hope of resolution, and the staff on hand would have a clue as to what would be involved. For a while now, he operated in the Mid and Outer Rims; when a new offer came in his office, from the Bank of the Core, he didn't hesitate one second. Sure, Pizza Hutt had holdings in the Core, and Dulvoyinn was the regional headquarters of the company in the Core. Just that the Bank of the Core was an intriguing deal. Theysa have 20 branches slaten for construction, but theysa not move forward with issa until theysa find another food-based partner? he thought, before he could think of a reply. And... Kaikeilius? Wouldn't accepting to negotiate with the Bank of the Core increase the risk to which IGR is exposed? Interconnectedness could make it so that a bank could bring another one down with it if something went awry with that bank. That, unfortunately, few Jedi actually knew how, and even Ugohr only knew that it could, but had very little idea as to how. Nevertheless, he accepted to respond, and maybe even to give him a coupon for free Pizza Hutt merchandise.

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ATTN: [member="Primarch Iedolas"]

I have to take it that Jessica tipped Your Majesty off about my involvement in Pizza Hutt; I would like to hold a meeting, holographic or in-person, regarding the deal with the Bank of the Core. Please let me know what works for you.

Ugorh Poof
CEO, Pizza Hutt

Attachment: Pizza Hutt gift certificate

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[King Iedolas Solidor]

His people were descended of wood folks. They once lived in the woods, with no technology, hunting for food and learning magic from the gods in the forests. And now, here he was, leading his people in a age of immense advance, where not only they could cure most, if not all, diseases, but they had to rely in machines with great intelligence to help them in their daily tasks. And not only that, but in the communications as well, for now they could project themselves for others to watch.

“Stand by, Iedolas Aldercapt Solidor, First of His Name, Duke of House Solidor, King of Kaikielius, Chairman in the Bank of the Core and elected Primarch of the Interstellar Protectorate!”, the voice of his herald announce, as it was customary for most nobles of such old blood to still do it so. The elzeri were, still, a people of many traditions from their days of roaming all over the galaxy. As his image showed up his whole body perfectly, Iedolas smiled and nodded for the person that received him.

"Greetings", he announced, his body being projected by the holocrab that held his image. Clear and proud. Funny for him was the fact that the machines in this new age of technology were quite the emotional pieces, with personalities and even feelings. “Your transmission was much welcome to us in Kaikielius. As said by my envoys, i would like to discuss terms of a great deal. Jessica was a real lady when she dealt with me, so elegant and so caring. Hard to see her kind around the galaxy in these days.”

[member="Ugohr Poof"]

 

[Ugohr Poof]

"Yoursa envoys' original communications contain una mention for usen to open Pizza Hutts in twenty branches"

For some reason [member="Primarch Iedolas"]' envoys saw fit to explicitly mention Jessica as a referral source; as far as he knew her, she operated a business in a different industry, with which he is familiar mostly because he was one of the first to use what that manufacturer produced (Chandrila was the nail in his combat coffin), but also because it was the former majority owner of Pizza Hutt. What he knew about Jessica other than her being a ceremonial chairwoman whose actual power on the company is limited, had little to do with her personality, and nearly everything to do with her tactical ability in ground operations. As unoriginal Ugohr feels it is, he had an offer linking the two would be useful for low-income clients. For una low-income client, even una small free nibble, multicultural or not, can make una maxibig difference in itsa daily life, he thought, before he pitched an idea, maybe a little out of place, but better do so now than never. Just that he had to make sure that they won't overshadow the BotC so no more than 40% of the total space inside a branch should be devoted to a Pizza Hutt joint in his mind.

"If clients open una bank or investment account, wesa supply a gift certificate. However, wesa not want to occupy more space in una branch dan yousa use for yoursa bankin activities"

 

[King Iedolas Solidor]

In all his life, four hundred years of existence, Iedolas had never met a Gungam before. He had been in Naboo only for a short thing, never really meeting the gungans, and one thing was certain, he never want it to meet another gungam again in his life. He was toasting his brain, trying to understand what that creature was saying to him in that funny way of speaking.

“Well, mister Poof.”, he said, licking his lips his tongue for a moment, “We do have the desire to open twenty Pizza Hutts next to our small buildings and propaganda boards in Kaikielius and five other moons. After all, the common folk will probably walk inside the building just to eat those pizzas, will also be a way of improving our popularity with all. However…”, he lifted his finger high in the air, saying with a calm tone, “We could buy your Pizza Hutts store, run ourselves following and respecting your standards, pay you the royalties and then make a deal that for each new planet, or branch we open in somewhere else, we shall buy ten more Pizza Hutts stores, with products fully provided by your company.”

That was quite common when dealing with large food companies. The local managers would rule their small shops to serve the corporation and their own interests. The Primarch was very interested in this, when you gave people the junk food they loved, and not just pills, they became happy and more willingly to serve others.

[member="Ugohr Poof"]

 

[Ugohr Poof]

"Disen sound like a franchisin deal"

And hisen plan on usin Pizza Hutt as a loss-leader for hisen bankin business, he thought, while realizing that the risk is pretty large for Pizza Hutts. Low-income clients tend to be more disciplined with loss-leaders, and, if his experience with the Skor supermarkets is any indication, low-income clients tended to buy large quantities of the loss-leaders if they were stockpileable, i.e. their shelf lives were long enough. To the extent they could afford to do so of course. Now, what's par for the course with respect to royalties paid by franchise operators is typically around 5-10% of the gross sales, that which depended on ingredient procurement in the restaurant industry, with the lower royalties belonging to the chains that allowed franchisees to buy their own ingredients, and the higher royalties typically covered ingredients and marketing. Just that [member="Primarch Iedolas"] is about to become the largest franchisee Ugohr ever attempted to deal with, with 20 units on Kaikielius alone, and an additional 10 units for each new world they plan on opening branches on. Typically franchisees wanted to run up to five units at most.

"For ten percent royalties, yousa get ingredients and marketing done by usen"

 

[King Iedolas Solidor]

When people were happy, they accepted everything. At least in his opinion, if you gave them alcohol, entertainment, holidays and cheap food, it never mattered if they were human, elzeri, miraluka, vahla, kaleesh, ratattaki or any of the other alien races the Protectorate had in their borders would love that cheap and delicious food. He would indeed take their products to serve in the next dinner with the board to show them how brilliant that investment truly was.

Place all those Pizza Hutts in the ringcities and skyhooks around the planet, in company buildings next to ATMs with the BoC logo. It was brilliant, who would not want to eat that quick and warm treat melting inside your mouth? Five hundred billion permanent residents in Kaikielius would love those. As he was signing a deal to buy so many franchises, Iedolas knew what percentage was perfect for that, math and mechanics were always something his people were good at.

“Your lordship is a paragon of executive composure!”, Iedolas said, one of his favorite quotes to pamper his clients or allies. “You have a deal. We shall transfer the money once your office send us the paperwork.”

[member="Ugohr Poof"]

 

[Ugohr Poof]

The Gungan knew how Pizza Hutt would benefit, and how [member="Primarch Iedolas"], and his Bank of the Core, would benefit but the main issue was: would Ugohr be subsidizing a competitor to his other business, in which he no longer has any direct role in its operations, albeit indirectly? The paperwork for a franchising deal this big was more complex than the more standard franchising deals Ugohr's franchising department was usually dealing in. Just that Ugohr sent in a request for the paperwork regarding the franchising deal he was about to close with the Bank of the Core, and that he would receive not only the paperwork, but also the recipes for a few maxibig pizzas, breaded fish and other multicultural nibbles. If disen maxibig pizzas good for theirsa board, disen good for theirsa clients as well, he thought, while the meeting where the BotC board would discuss and, hopefully, ratify the deal would actually feature a few slices of pizza for each of them. Just that there ought to be some nibbles for a wide array of species, and both parties knew that: it was a win-win for them and for good reason. Now that the paperwork was being prepared:

"Yousa must be a little patient; a maxibig franchisin deal include more complicated paperwork dan a regular franchisin contract. And not only yousa would receive da contract paperwork, yousa shall receive recipes for disen units to cook with"

 

[King Iedolas Solidor]

The elzeri nodded after hearing his words. The way he spoke was difficult for most to understand and even tolerate, but Iedolas had no problem with any of that, he was after all, used to dealing with aliens thanks to the Bank of the Core. He hated dealing with the Hutts, those damned slugs that never spoke anything besides huttese, a language he learned himself so he would not avoid any error in translation, but he still hated the damn thing.

“I would not expect anything else. It is a big deal, for both the BotC and your company. I have a legal department that can deal with all those small things, just send them the contract and you shall have a signature by the end of the week, without any problem about your terms.”

He was taking a big risk, Iedolas knew that, but the profit they would make with this deal, was too good to be ignored by them. Money was the only real thing that kept making governments bend their knees and bowing down, for money meant power to achieve so much more in the galaxy, good things and evil things, money was the only reason the Protectorate was truly born.

[member="Ugohr Poof"]

 

[Ugohr Poof]

Yes, it's true that non-Gungans often found Gungans difficult to communicate with orally, regardless of whether or not it takes place face-to-face (with holocommunicators qualifiying or not). Luckily for [member="Primarch Iedolas"], the paperwork would not be written in Gungan script, regardless of any issues whereby the right of the Bank of the Core to open new units at their discretion would not violate any contractual laws, or any other issues associated with that specific deal. Yes, there was a time and place for that sort of items, just that it may as well warrant a few special clauses should the relationship between the two be terminated, at either party's discretion. Now that the Gungan was having the paperwork in front of him, he would simply go over that and be done with it. And, of course, have his signature so that Iedolas could put his signature at the end of it. The Gungan was happy to see the paperwork completed faster than he could hope for, a little too happy perhaps, but he did get the signature done and then the documentation is on its way to the Bank of the Core's legal department.

"Hair issa yoursa documentation" the Gungan told the other party when the documents with his signature affixed on those were being sent to his legal department.