Please, give me some feedback...

[Ugohr Poof]

I know, I have been doing many of the game's dirty jobs and it has put a lot on pressure on me OOCly, which can make me ruffle some feathers and make some mistakes, especially in PvP. (I usually stay away from PvP, and I don't usually do much of the classical "Jedi-vs-Sith" plots) While I found that I am a rather consistent poster, but sometimes I could go overboard in debt collection (perhaps I could be partially forgiven given the number of tag malfunctions that occur). As a writer, it seems that I mostly use my characters with corporations to do corporate development more than I do character development. And even when I am one of the more economy-centered writers ([member="Darth Veles"] you probably recognize the contents of the list that follows)...

Here is a breakdown of how I would describe my characters in relation to the dirty IC jobs they perform:

• [member="Ugohr Poof"]: Combat: minesweeping/artillery - at last count, no active FU character plays either role, unless if some Mando FU did artillery - but that proved to be his IC career roadblock, non-combat: real estate (IGR is the only PC-owned real estate brokerage in Chaos, but may not be owned by that toon for much longer) and most of his non-faction threads pertain to real estate, plus Gungans are a race with loads of OOC hate
• [member="Charzon Loulan"]: Although owning a shipyard is not by itself a dirty job of the game, gearing the shipyard mostly towards non-combat ships is - admittedly it is one of the main roadblocks facing that corporation; it is difficult to get major factions to buy even limited supplies of non-combat ships, but mobile drydocks may be the saving grace
• [member="Dunames Lopez"]: Operates a full-service spaceline that does its best to operate in honest markets and has a different, complimentary vision of what it means to serve the First Order - to her ensuring the availability of an array of ways to maintain the happiness of the population serves the interests of the First Order - the other PC-owned spacelines of the game are mostly fronts for smuggling, and there isn't a whole lot of those in the game either
• [member="Cathul Thuku"]: Holds together the entire mental health system of Mandalore by herself by virtue of being the only reputable therapist on that planet pre-Kashyyyk (she ICly complained very often at the time about the destitute condition the Mandalorian mental health system is in and how just two planets take care of nearly all the Mandalorian Clans' needs for mental healthcare, Alderaan and Ithor) - also exhibits a radical approach to the Force that contributed to my OOC ability to polarize, and now as governor of Azure, actually takes into account that there is a budget to run and public health to care about
• [member="Jessica Med-Beq"] Tries to fill too many roles at once, many of which are rather conventional - nevertheless I used her, both as a NPC and as a PC, to design starship components everyone else seems to take for granted - and the very non-combat ships manufactured by Charzon's company; the logical way forward long-term is to play her in the non-combat roles I already use her for. To be fair tech designers are rather common, even though they mostly focus on the design of implements of destruction, whereas Jessica will accept that implements of destruction is part of the game to an extent, it is by no means the be-all, end-all of Chaos tech (even if it means NPCs will buy these things in the background, rather than PCs or their corporations) - I acknowledge that she has the most slippery slopes out of the characters I have in terms of playability
• [member="Klesta"] I don't intend to play him as much as the other five, but I have him slotted into more of a socialite/diplomatic role

But there is only so much I could improve as a writer without some external feedback, and this is where you all come in.

 

[Ra Vizsla]

My only feedback is that I wish you would at least try to be more secretive in betraying the Clans with Cathul by rebelling the Azure hex.

 

[Natasi Fortan]

Well, since you asked...

Your metagaming is extremely frustrating. You don't seem to have a concept for what is public knowledge and what is not, or when to keep non-public information non-public. (See, for instance, the Galactic Games thread and the Lanteeb podracing thread, in which your podcaster announcer seemed to have intimate knowledge of something that was happening, essentially, invisibly). If you're not sure whether information is public, or whether your character would know the information, a PM to the person in question would be helpful.

But your enthusiasm is nice to see

 

[Ugohr Poof]

Surely metagaming, while the main thing, isn't the only room for improvement. You might have noticed that I haven't played a dark-sider FU yet.

And despite that, I always feel that I already have a lot of characters, some of which actually do feel different from the run-of-the-mill FU characters that populate these boards, and not just because they are Gungan or Jawa respectively.

 

[Ashin Varanin]

[member="Ugohr Poof"]

I like that you try very hard to do things that nobody else does. I think you'd find your achievements more rewarding if you put less focus on advertising that uniqueness. Half your writing boils down to 'I am the only ______ in the galaxy." Get respect by going out and doing that unique stuff.

 

[Ra Vizsla]

[member="Ugohr Poof"]

Okay, I lied about that being my only feedback.

Everyone metagames, just dial it down (alot) and you'd be fantastic. Like Natasi said, your enthusiasm is there, but to me - it always comes across like you're pushing an agenda.

Aside from metagaming, as far as MC goes, you're one (not the only) that asks for peaceful things to do and we're trying to cater to that. But some of your ideas seem extremely left field, like the mental health thing. Like, you've written in the OP of this thread that Cath holds together the "entire mental health system by herself".

I'm not even sure how that would be feasible, realistically. I like exploring the route of PTSD, but from a writer's perspective, it just seems like you made a hostile takeover of a mental health industry that nobody knows the details about - but to what end? How does this include other people? And, just me personally asking, why? It's a very niche thing and unique to do, but to me.... it's just so left field. It's like the one thing we didn't know we didn't want.

I really do think if you want more people to write with Cathul while she's in the Clans you should expand your horizons to more medical fields, like Rianna did. While most Mandalorian PCs wouldn't seek out therapy, there is always a constant need for medical services beyond that singular scope. And with a need so large for medical services like we have, you could join Rianna in hosting one of the largest Medical Care companies in the Galaxy.

That also incorporates mental health rehabilitation.

Negative: Stop caring about the meta so much & try to be more inclusive/expansive in your IC ideas of other writers.

Positive: Your motivation is on point and way higher than most others, which is a hard thing to come by. In my opinion (grain of salt, I'm no great writer) you're an above average writer as well.

 

[Cathul Thuku]

[member="Ajira Cardei"] You threaded with my alt Ugohr about one of those things (real estate - that's all the threading I initiated under that alt after Chandrila happened). Some of these things tend to lend itself poorly to threading outside a dominion or an invasion (Ugohr's combat functions, Dunames' core business; sure shipping is important ICly, delivery of supplies w/o smuggling just isn't the same as smuggling and lends itself poorly to threading beyond contract threads).

[member="Ra Vizsla"] I'll just post a LFG about her asking to learn Force-healing from someone else. Once Cathul learns Force-healing then she can go on her merry way accomplishing the full range of medical functions as a baar'ur. Also MandalMedical is almost entirely about physical healthcare, but with Force-healing I could take part in MandalMedical's activities.

As far as Cathul (and later Clan Lok) having complete control over Mandalore's mental healthcare system, ICly there were only (mostly aruetiise or dar'manda) NPC charlatans that passed off as therapists before she arrived. In canon Mandalore proper has a population of just 4M; does that still hold by 845 ABY? If we accept that therapist density on the core Mando worlds of canon (Concordia, Concord Dawn, Mandalore) is lower than what is prevalent on planets like Alderaan, Axxila, Ithor, there's still not a whole lot of charlatans. Perhaps numbered in the double-digits or something like that.

Echoy'la, in contrast, has a population of 30k or so, no therapist whatsoever. Ask [member="Isley Verd"] about that; when I threaded about my quest for a beskar'gam (posts #11 and #15), he stated that Cathul would be the first therapist to set foot on that planet since he began living on that planet. I took his statement as an IC confirmation from the then-Mandalorian Empire government that there was no therapist in activity on that world, regardless of actual qualifications.

 

[Rusty]

It's not that you're lacking in talent as a writer, or that you aren't highly intelligent. Because, from what I can gather, you've got both going in spades. The out of left field ideas aren't even a bad thing, as far as I'm concerned. If you want to try stuff that hasn't been done, or do stuff that has been done in new ways, that's great. Variety is the spice of life and all that. Hell, I don't even mind the meta. It can be annoying, but everyone does it at some point and it can be kinda hard to find a good balance on a new board.

What you're lacking most seems to be common sense.

Leaving aside the tanks as artillery thing, which is more an affront to my sense of professional pride as a red leg than anything, about every third post of yours I run across, I find myself scratching my head and wondering what in the hell you were thinking. Just because something can be done doesn't mean it should, and a lot of the stuff you seem to think can be done are borderline insane. And not in a "well, this is just crazy enough to work" sort of way either, we're talking "extra crispy deep fried handfuls of Prozac lightly frosted with ketamine" insane. Dial down the goatkark psycho and stop with the random posts on people's stuff about how you're awesomer than they are and you'll be well on your way to notoriety for all the right reasons rather than being brought up in a half dozen different Skype chats because people are wondering what universe you're from where this post or that one seemed like a good idea.

[member="Ugohr Poof"]

 

[Ra Vizsla]

In canon Mandalore proper has a population of just 4M; does that still hold by 845 ABY? If we accept that therapist density on the core Mando worlds of canon (Concordia, Concord Dawn, Mandalore) is lower than what is prevalent on planets like Alderaan, Axxila, Ithor, there's still not a whole lot of charlatans. Perhaps numbered in the double-digits or something like that.

I honestly have no words for what is happening right now.

If you're trolling me, you're good.