Protege Moi

[Beatrice Govan]

Gladiatorial Arena, The Emperor's Citadel, Dromund Kaas

Silence.

Evelynn stood in a familiar scene, so close to home and yet so vastly different. The theatre of violence. A lavish box for only the grandest spectator. These things had been hers in another life. The twin Queens of Rattatak, renowned for their abject cruelty and The Cauldron. Their own arena that played naught but the most vicious of blood sports, life was inconsequential, it existed to be toyed with and then snuffed out. It was the only way.

It was always a grand way of getting killed by your own slaves in a rebellion.

The arena was empty. Not one set of carnage-starved eyes observing in the seats. Not a single set of fear-torn feet upon carnivorous black stone. Only Evelynn, stood in her father's box just staring down, observing absolutely nothing but memories in the still of night.

She recalled her beasts, those who she would actively root for whenever blood was to be shed. A wonderful menagerie of creatures both deadly and benign that she loved as much as she could. Evelynn had always loved animals, for they only acted within their natures. Yes, sometimes nature was cruel but not like the hand of man. It was for survival, territory or food. She recalled that her lover had slain every single creature in a cruel twist of vengeance, it had been like a joke to her.

Echoes of that devastation still remained within her mind but the feeling lacked conviction, it was almost transparent.

Her pets had never met pleasant ends. The first, a childhood Kath Hound had been slain and force fed to her by her own father, the one who had decidedly brought her back from the Netherworld.

A frown, eyebrows knitted and teeth clamped together. It was frustration, for Evelynn could not remember the beast's name! At once it would have been incomprehensible to her, that Kath Hound marked the most blissful period of her life, when she was just a shy girl from Dantooine with a stutter, completely unaware of the chaos that would devour her mind and body. How could she forget his name?!

“I am mad,” she admitted softly, experiencing a period of lucidity in her silent reflections.

Even still the urges bubbled just beneath the skin. They were never gone, not since she had returned to the realm of the living. So many wants and needs, desires that screamed in the back of her head that thirsted for blood spilled and agony experienced. There were brief moments like this, where humanity and normalcy had its time, a chair in the spotlight but the woman knew that it was only a matter of time before it all would shift again and she would succumb.

-

[member="Mordecai Zambrano"]

 

[Mordecai Zambrano]

Now you're carrying the weights of​

Mistakes, emotions that were not thought through​

And I'm sorry for the burden​

Of lessons I would not have without you​

(Here)​

​

​

"Just take us around the block," he whispered, voice barely audible above the violent gales of wind. It rushed through his hair and splashed upon his face, coloring his cheeks pink with its chilly sting. Beneath him, Rhaegos rumbled in response, obviously ecstatic about not being cooped up in his pen anymore. Mordecai reached down to give the Arkanian dragon a loving pat before he ripped the reins tighter, lowering himself closer to his scaled frame. It didn't help - the wind still lashed and tore at his clothes like a passionate lover.

Far too chilly, far too humid. He hated this place. It reminded him of Panatha.

A listless gaze went down towards the earth. Mordecai yawned, tears in his eyes (from the wind, of course). The Cauldron. He distinctly remembered the name, mostly from his brother's tales. Blood-sports, needless bloodshed spilled for the sake of credits and entertainment value. He grimaced at the memory, especially the way Kaine's eyes twinkled with delight as he recalled the scenes of valiant gladiators and bloodthirsty beasts.

He'd grown far too attached to animals, reptiles particularly, to enjoy seeing them die. They had a tendency to be... far more honest than man. Rhaegos never told lies, nor did abject cruelty fill his modus operandi. And it seemed like they could read his mind as well. The dragon's weight shifted beneath him, large wings folding inwards as Rhaegos took a dive towards the arena. No doubt curiosity had taken him as well.

Mordecai grunted and shivered. "Not for too long. Carly is waiting for us," he reminded the beast, "Dinner, remember?"

The thought of food stirred him, deepening his dive before wings immediately spread to catch their fall. It had only taken seconds to drop thousands of feet.

He was still cold. Another yawn and his ears popped. Mordecai released the reins and slid off of his friend, raising his arms above his head to stretch.

"Seems empty. Don't eat anything, we have food at home."

[member="Evelynn"]

 

[Beatrice Govan]

For a short while longer Evelynn stared, the green of her eyes still searching for something that was long lost to her. She brought her right hand to her chest, fingers splayed and for a moment the hand rested atop her traditional Sith garb, feeling the faint beat of her heart that confirmed that, yes, she was really living, and yet.

Her hand travelled upwards, until her diminutive fingers were wrapped around her own throat. There was tremble within her soul. How hard could she squeeze? Did she have the strength to crush her own windpipe? There was a temptation to try, not fleeting, no it was lodged within her thoughts like a sickness. What about her fingernails? How much flesh could they rip and tear until the crimson poured forth and pooled at her feet? Eyelids fluttered, mouth opening as if to gasp as the want, the need built. It would feel so go-

The sudden landing of a dragon startled the woman straight from her self-destructive appetites. She gasped, and immediately drew her hand away from her throat, catching herself in that moment of sick desire. It only confirmed her madness.

“Who...?”

Who would just casually drop into the Emperor's personal colosseum at will? Who would dare? Blinking away prior thoughts, the woman chose to focus her interests on this fellow intruder instead. There was little fear held for the man or his companion, more a growing curiosity. She'd be a mere snack at a moment's notice, but this did not bother her broken sensibilities at all.

She began to climb out of her father's box and into the seats, clambering over each row with the awkwardness that came with her short stature, her eyes purely fixated upon the man and his dragon.

“If you are here for the show, then I am afraid that you are very late,” the woman declared, her voice not the loudest but benefiting from the echo of the empty stadium as she continued her descent, “otherwise, you should not be here.”

Not that she had room to talk.

Upon reaching the front row the woman stood and peered down into the pit, not choosing just quite yet to drop right in and get properly acquainted with this stranger.

“Who,” Evelynn began, the word swirling and filled to the brim with an accusatory tone, “are you?”

-

[member="Mordecai Zambrano"]

 

[Mordecai Zambrano]

The ground felt firm under his feet. As much as he cherished the skies, the feeling of solid earth beneath him felt more relieving each and every time he hopped off of Rhaegos. Maybe it was his age finally catch up to him - no longer the ever stalwart and youthful warrior that fought alongside his brother. He was only halfway through his life yet he still felt elderly.

The word tasted bitter in his mind. Living long in a profession where most die young tended to age the body faster, or so he'd heard.

Mordecai stole a glance at his companion, dutifully sniffing the air and kicking up dust as he twirled to inspect the arena. Then he perked up. Scales flexed, saliva sieved through bared fangs. The reptile's snout shot upwards, golden eyes narrowing as they focused on the interloper. A young woman materialized from the shadows of the Emperor's viewing box to lean against the railing, a venomous tone in her accusing words. Rhaegos flinched, stopping himself short of a frothing frenzy the second Mordecai raised his hand.

The Lord of the Skies snorted. His brother's people sure liked to inform intruders of the land's law. He'd never berate them for doing their due diligence.

The Sith Lord lowered his hand, performing only the barest of bows. "Mordecai Zambrano, younger brother of Lord Kaine Zambrano." No need for other titles or ranks. The surname usually did the trick.

"And you are, girl?" His emerald eyes met hers with a strange sort of familiarity.

[member="Evelynn"]

 

[Beatrice Govan]

For a brief second there was a moment of uncertainty, a worry that the man's companion was indeed going to end her second spell of living until it was halted by a single gesture. It was upsetting, Evelynn had always held a better bond with animal than with man. It had forever been a natural talent, befriending creatures both great and small was one of her past life's specialties. Had that part of her truly died? Had it been ripped from her like so many things before?

There was no time for her to mourn this possibility in the face of the intruder that stared back. He couldn't have been just anyone. No, not if they were this bold.

And they were not just anyone.

An uncle.

The woman sneered as he layered on the title of his brother, her father, as if the mere mention of this was supposed to send her scampering. In normal situations it would have, meek bows and apologies before the underlings would scurry away, hoping that no more would be said of this interaction in fear of unjust punishment.

But it was blood for blood here.

“Evelynn,” she replied stiffly, an awkward pause filling the air as she hastily was sure to add the rest, “Zambrano.” After all, she had been so accustomed to just going by her first name and only that. Having previously cast aside the houses of Dorn and Zambrano with little thought. However in her new scenario, embracing her father's surname was to be the wisest course of action.

“I am...”

Wanting.

Needing.

A G O O D G I R L.

Scared.

A second was taken to close her eyes and gather herself, thoughts spiraling, growing ever stronger and insidious. A sharp inhale before emerald eyes once again stared back with vigour.

“...daughter of Lord Kaine Zambrano.”

It would have been unusual to Mordecai if he had managed to keep track of the ever expanding family tree. Evelynn Zambrano was dead. Ripped apart by slaves, and it was known. Stranger still were she alive, she would have been in her forties, one of the first to begin the mass family expansion and yet the fragile waif that stood before him was almost half that age. Despite all logic however the familiarity was there and while Evelynn had never been one to spend quality time with the family, off upon her own conquests and betraying her name before too long, it was undeniable. She could feel it.

“Have we met before, uncle?” That last word dripped with a fear-tinged venom that expected his wrath, as if he were no better than his brother. She leaned further over the rail, eyes probing, searching for his intent. Will you hurt me?

I need it.

-

[member="Mordecai Zambrano"]

 

[Mordecai Zambrano]

Rhaegos was the first one the respond of of the pair. The Arkanian dragon's eyes turned to embers the moment he heard the girl whisper her last name in reply. Short snarls fell from his vile mouth, and all it took was a single pump of his monstrous wings to see himself parallel to Evelynn on the railing. The weight of his being set cracks in the frame of the box. Dust was everywhere, thrown into a chaotic dance. The beast glowered and lowered his snout the young woman, nostrils flaring as he inhaled all of her.

Rhaegos needed an answer, craved it, as if smelling her alone would satisfy the emptiness of his belly.

"Rhae-"

The reptile grunted loudly, his thin-slitted eyes still locked upon the woman. Then he softened, easing himself into a more comfortable perch near the viewing box. Then dropped back down onto his haunches, obviously content. He'd gotten exactly what he'd wanted from the encounter, and now appeared more interested in pushing around the chairs of the viewing box than listening to the pair speak.

Mordecai stifled an amused laugh. "Sorry. He's my, uh, mobile lie detector. Can literally smell bloodlines, and I guess he wanted to make sure you were the real deal before he ate you - even though I told him not to eat you."

He tilted his head, straining for a moment before the joints in his neck popped. He folded his arms, looking up at the Evelynn. "I don't suppose we've ever met before, though I know how my brother is with women and children. Lots and lots of them around, and I only know the names of like four or five.

"So, my little niece, what are you up to?" He turned to gesture at the empty arena and it's audience of absolute nothingness. "Not much going on here."

[member="Evelynn"]

 

[Beatrice Govan]

In an instant the dragon answered and Evelynn stood there, and in her shame found herself petrified with breath held. Desperately she sought something, anything from the eyes of the beast that approached. Once upon a time there would have been no fear, no hesitation to hold out a hand to the jagged maw that now sat level with her, and yet there was nothing. No control, no bond to be had. There was a beast, and a mere girl. Predator and prey. Eyes welled slightly, perhaps in the knowledge of what was lost to her but also from the burning scent that the monster brought with his massive bulk.

Then just like that it was done with her.

His stifled laugh broke the tension, allowing the woman to breathe once more and take a quick moment to collect herself, having clearly been somewhat shaken by the experience.

“I'm glad,” she responded distantly, her eyes finally travelling back to meet her uncle as he assured her that she was not designated as a quick snack.

It was strange.

He was not like the rest. The way he moved, the way he spoke. It was unaccustomed to her. Despite their terse introduction the man had seemed to relax, and spoke in a manner that almost seemed friendly. Memories flickered, looking for past friendly faces that could have made this scene more familiar. Faint hints of those that had once shown her kindness made an attempt to surface, but their names were gone and then only the faces of those who had shown cruelty were present and at the forefront.

“I do not know,” she replied quietly, as if expecting his demeanour to be a ruse and for the floor to give way beneath her feet into some form of ruthless trap, “contemplating, trying to remember who...”

She paused, and once more seemed to drift into the ether, eyes losing focus and searching far beyond Mordecai and into the unknown.

“I have been dead,” Evelynn suddenly announced, coming back into the present and returning her attentions to her uncle, “in the Netherworld for twenty years.” Her arms folded across her midriff, as if she had been hit by a sudden chill. This felt wrong somehow, her mind told her to throw herself from the railing and down into the pit. Sudden flashes of compound fractures and cracked ribs burst into her head and demanded such satisfaction. It shook her, but at least the woman managed to keep some form of composure.

“Your brot-My father has decided to grant me a second chance. I am to become a member of the Sith Brotherhood and earn my place.”

It was clear from the bitterness that lingered in her voice that she did not want this, that death was the preferable option. She had never asked for this, never wanted to be a Sith or partake in her father's Empire.

Her face softened, and for the first time in a great many years, the reluctant girl that she once was appeared.

“I don't know what I'm doing. I'm sca-”

Just like that, the face of vulnerability vanished. That's not you. You're not her any more. She's dead. You are something else. Her hands shot out to hold onto the railing, out of a true fear that her desires would only lead her to throw herself off. Not a drop steep enough to kill, but definitely to harm her petite frame.

“Is this your hobby? Dragon flight in the night, uncle? Tell me about yourself, please."

-

[member="Mordecai Zambrano"]

 

[Mordecai Zambrano]

Mordecai stood there, motionless, as his petite, young niece explained. It seemed a lot more than just a simple monologue, the uncertainty in her voice and the timidness of her movement. Unsure, alone, afraid. Not to mention that she may or may not have been one of his brother's pet projects, something that Mordecai himself would never live down. No matter how often the younger Zambrano pleaded for his brother to cease with experimenting upon their own blood, he never did.

Honor, it was a fickle thing. One kept one's word. One obeyed one's lord. But then once you're ordered to do what was dishonorable, you're not able to decide whether that shame was his alone. Mordecai was wrong, very wrong. It was my choice, and I must stand by it. Long may I die soon.

The Sith Lord exhaled evenly, feeling more than a little hollow. His heart broke for the poor soul before him. What would any other Sith do? What would Carly do? What would a decent human being do?

Before he'd chose to do nothing, not because he couldn't, but because he'd been scared. Just as she was right this moment.

Mordecai perked up at her last question, obviously pulling the conversation away from herself for the moment. Perhaps it was too volatile for the time being, like a fuse just waiting to be lit. That was okay, he could work with that.

"Oh," he let a little grin frame his features, "Just taking him out for a walk, I guess you could say. Wife makes me do it, otherwise he gets restless and tears stuff up around the house. Not easy taking care of him, a lot harder than an Akk dog."

He turned and started for the stairs, taking his eyes off of his niece just for a moment. "Mind if I come up there with you? Would be a lot nicer to chat with a chair beneath my ass."

[member="Evelynn"]

 

[Beatrice Govan]

Mercifully he obliged, more than happy to explain to her the woes of regular dragon maintenance. It gave the woman something to turn her focus to, trying to fill her own thoughts with that of restless dragons, painting a vivid picture in her head about his home life. A man, his wife and their dragon.

“I can imagine,” Evelynn replied with a tame smile as she turned a thought to the poor furniture that never stood a chance against the turbulent beast.

It was almost funny.

There was a mundane notion to it all, a backdrop of an ordinary life. The happy couple with the rambunctious pet, they knew the commitment that such a thing would afford. Less chance to go away for a romantic break, expenses for food and toys, time spent to train the creature but ultimately worth the while. Expect this was indeed not an Akk dog, and this was not a regular man. She almost giggled at the notion of a giant bowl for his companion.

“Oh,” the distraction was broken when he asked if he could come up. It shouldn't have been a concern, her uncle was clearly cut from a different cloth than the rest of the clan, “of course.” Then again, the act of trusting had betrayed the girl time and time again, but the fear wasn't what he could do to her, or even what she could attempt to do to him. “My apologies, I've been terribly rude.”

Thoughts were muddled now, stuck somewhere in between domesticated dragons and the sick impulse that never seemed to cease scratching.

Her grip around the railing tightened, growing into a white knuckle grip that made it seem like Evelynn had a fear of floating away. Not quite so. Her mind raced as he was no doubt ascending the stairs to the front row. It was fine. It was important to keep talking, to be distracted and have her mind elsewhere but her own malevolent thoughts. It seemed to be helping, this encounter by far had offered the greatest amount of mental tranquility since her return. An almost calm that wasn't thought to be capable any more.

“What...”

Size is your dragon's bowl?

What do you want from me?

“I mean,” her words came out clumsily, as if the connection between brain and mouth were somewhat faulty, “you're so different. I don't know what to think. I...why are you not like the others?”

-

[member="Mordecai Zambrano"]

 

[Mordecai Zambrano]

The smile lingered on his face as he rose up the dusty stairs, bobbing and weaving his way past the arena's seating. It was a question he had been asked many, many, many times before. Aloof and tranquil weren't exactly the best words to describe a frakking Lord of the Sith Empire, yet a few of his officers had. It was something he'd even asked himself before. Perhaps he was simply cut from a different cloth? Or perhaps the fact that his life had actually been pretty okay up until this point?

A family that hadn't exactly tormented their second heir. A youth spent in school and at war. A beautiful commoner girl that loved him despite his occupation. A loyal, winged friend that judged him not for his morality but for his character - and the size of his pantry.

Mordecai answered her in stride, nearing the viewing box. "Because I am nothing more than a simple man. I'm a soldier, and my duty is to my empire and my family. Nothing more, nothing less. That, and I haven't exactly experienced great tragedy in my years. I'm probably the luckiest man in the entire universe to have made it this far, yet my heart still beats."

The man drew closer, shuffling inside of the viewing box until he could clearly see his niece. Pretty emerald eyes, lithe frame, white-knuckled grip upon the railing. She'd been dead, right? The man promptly tore his eyes away from her to glare and shoo and Rhaegos. One of the chairs already had teeth and claw marks on it. Mordecai sighed as he took that one for himself, sliding another over for Evelynn.

"Here, have a seat, my niece." As the man sat down, he considered the floor for a moment before his eyes met hers.

"Do you want to not be like the others too?"

[member="Evelynn"]

 

[Beatrice Govan]

Duty-bound.

It would explain a lot. There weren't many Sith that held his disposition, and it was strangely admirable. The path of the Dark Side held many pitfalls for one's character. Ambition most of all ruled supreme and in their world that often meant betrayal and corruption, and it was never enough. It was more power, more status, a never ending cycle of more that almost always ended in demise. That was the crux of her own end, after all.

The lack of misfortune probably helped, most journeys were spurred on by events. Pain was a catalyst for so much, how many Sith had found their way there through the sheer misfortune of tragedy.

“You may very well be the luckiest man in the universe,” Evelynn replied, her voice far away as pangs of jealousy gripped a hold of her chest.

Where would she have been now without such catastrophe? In her real forties on Dantooine, married perhaps and with children, selling local produce at the marke...

...oh, it hurt.

“That's not me,” she mouthed silently, her eyes brimming with a quiet grief, mourning, just for that moment for what could have been, and what never would be.

“Ah,” a small shake of the head returned her to the present, far away from from ridiculous little fantasies, “a seat, yes, of course. I apologise,” she said swiftly. It was unsure if she was apologising for standing, for drifting off into her own world, or for just existing. Likely a combination of all three.

She drifted over to the offered chair and sat down, briefly wondering who her father would have maimed for the bite marks in the seats. If she had judged her uncle right, he would probably be the one owning up to it and sparing any poor soul from dire consequence. The woman sat with rigid posture, her small frame set with her hands upon her knees as if she were about to be reprimanded by a stern mistress.

His question was loaded, and it took a few moments for the girl to even answer.

“I am like the others,” Evelynn slowly admitted, her face showing disgust in the awareness of it, “I do not wish to fool you, uncle but I am just as monstrous, if not more.”

Oh yes, for she been hurt before and in turn she had also hurt. She had been the Queen of a slave planet, relished in the joy of watching her beasts rip apart helpless slaves and for what? For fun! For the excess of it all! The sheer delight that their death rattles and crimson stains brought forth!

Her right hand drifted over to the back of her left and began to scratch.

“You truly are the luckiest man in the entire universe because what you are seeing is not me. This is, this is not me. I am...I don't, I don't know, I have these feelings and...and...I like...it...”

Scratch scratch scratch scratch scratch.

-

[member="Mordecai Zambrano"]

 

[Mordecai Zambrano]

Mordecai let the silence linger. It was an ample, needed pause. He watched his niece evenly.

"My circumstances are lucky, yes," he agreed absentmindedly. "But I am just like the others as well. You don't think I relished the bloodshed each and every time we landed on a distant world? How we carved and eviscerated Jedi, soldiers, and innocent children alike? Because I can assure you, I did. I remember it each and every waking moment."

The Lord leaned a little further back in his seat, reptile slobber clinging to the back of his robes.

"You're no monstrous than any other I've seen. You're also no more innocent. It's all varying shades of grey," he scoffed at himself, "And that sounds cliche as hell, but it's true."

Rhaegos was toned into the conversation, scooting ever so slightly closer. His forked tongue snaked in the air, as if he could taste the terse atmosphere. The Arkanian dragon practically slithered over to Evelynn, movements as tender as could be, until his scaled snout gently pressed against her leg. An urgent need gleamed in his golden eyes, as if to say, "Please, for the love of all that is holy, rub my scales."

Mordecai smiled dreamily at his best friend trying to occupy her hands.

"A dragon doesn't wonder why he enjoys killing and consuming. That's simply who he is. That's simply what a Sith is - what a Zambrano is. It's a rather terrible curse, don't you think, Evelynn?"

[member="Evelynn"]

 

[Beatrice Govan]

Peculiar.

Evelynn found it hard to imagine her uncle relishing the horrors of war, perhaps because he was so amicable in his presentation to her. However, she was not his duty and he was indeed, still a Zambrano. Had he managed to separate service from man? Blood demanded his loyalty, but it seemed to have no claim upon his mind. The very words he used however, bloodshed, carved, eviscerated, those words alone gave cause for the minuscule, pale hairs upon the back of her neck and along her arms to stand.

She was wanting.

Not just wanting to satisfy that itch that begged to be scratched, but wanting to be that grey that he purported her to be. She didn't feel grey, grey was complex and although muddled had redeeming qualities. No, she was filth, a stain, a mistake.

Just as her feverish scratching increased in tempo, slowly breaking the skin upon the back of her hand she was prodded by a snout. It startled her and once more brought her out of her thoughts. By the Force, even the dragon was sympathetic, well, after first impressions. Staring at his pleading eyes the girl's former love of creatures still did not return, but at the very least she relented, hand drawing away to give his scales a good strong itch. They were pleasantly warm.

“I did not even know that I held such a curse,” she replied slowly, trying to chose the right words in the scenario, “not until it was too far late.”

Kindness was not something that had been granted to the woman, and so this two-pronged attack by her uncle and his dragon left her with a sense of total vulnerability. There was so much to say, all this bile within her that was long-overdue to be expelled, but would it be wise? Would it be dangerous to tell him too much? Perhaps the Emperor's brother cared not for such affairs, after all, he cared not for the state of his arena.

Eyes were closed, will trying to conjure the courage to tell her story, or at least a fragment of it, all the while her hand still hard at work on dragon scratching.

“I had been hidden from my father and lived in blissful ignorance upon Dantooine until I was almost a woman,” she began, her words unsure and unsteady but somewhat bolstered by the pair beside her, “He found me, took me and used me to draw out my mother, and cut her down before me.”

The emotions felt upon that day lingered, imprinted upon her and the woman's free hand curled tightly into a fist.

“Then he slaughtered my Kath Hound and fed him to me,” Evelynn continued, those words coming out fast and blunt as if she had never told a soul this before. Had she? Who was there to confide in? There had been nobody. Fist clenched ever tighter.

I can't remember his name.

“Before long he was sick of my nature. I was too timid, I stammered too much. Not making enough progress. He...he had my vocal chords ripped out,” she was losing composure, eyes open, darting, sentences growing shorter and more fragmented, these memories were far more vivid, like only yesterday, “I remember, remember displeasing him. He locked me in a room. Blinded. Deafened. Stripped of senses. There was nothing. I don't know how...how long I was in there. I tried to scratch out my own...”

Trembling now, her nails dug into her palm, the hand upon the beast having grown ever still, the tempo of her memoir confusing the motions of her soothing petting. She considered her fingernails, mind focused upon the notion of breaking the skin, of shedding blood and how it would relieve her. It was her need. It was her want.

“I adapted.”

Through gritted teeth now, words were hissed. A new intensity was there, sinister and malicious.

“I learned to take pleasure in pain. It was the only way to survive. I rejoiced in giving it but,” deep inhale, wild eyes staring at her fist, feeling her nails puncture, the warmth of crimson, the very pressure bending her fingers, “I l o v e receiving it.”

Love. Present tense.

“Pain is my companion. It is always there for me, and ever since he brought me back it is all I can ever think about! There is nothing else! It is all I want! All I crave! All I need! I know that it will kill me soon but I still want it!”

A small chorus of sudden snaps came from the girl's clenched fist as her fingers fractured under the immense pressure she applied. Evelynn gasped, eyes closing once more accompanied by a slow, frenzied grin spreading from ear to ear with teeth bared. She felt joy. She felt pleasure. She felt alive.

-

[member="Mordecai Zambrano"]

 

[Mordecai Zambrano]

Like a well dispensing all of its contents, little Evelynn did so. Each word, each syllable, even the very intonation of the words gave way to the root cause of her curse. His brother, Kaine. The father of a great many "projects" and "playthings" that had brought him so much colorful joy. It was uncanny how Mordecai sniffed them out, finding his broken little playthings and guiding them. Nurturing them, even. Though, it appeared Evelynn got the worst of it.

And his heart broke for her. Though he wanted nothing more than to move or speak, it took every fibre of his being to remain seated. Placid. Calm. As silent as space, as still as stone.

The cracking of her fingers is what finally made him snap. Just hearing bone and sinew separate moved him. It was gut-wrenching and astoundingly pleasant all in a single frame. So satisfying to see something meant whole, break. Between morbid fascination and utter shock at what his niece had done, Mordecai found his moment to silently rise from his seat and make for Evelynn.

Rhaegos had stopped his pleasant, satisfied humming to lock both gleaming eyes upon the girl. Upon her gleeful grin and shattered fingers, crimson streaks spilling from torn flesh.

"That's enough, Evelynn," his voice came, raspy. "Only the gods above can truly understand what exactly what you went through, and I'm not about to sit here and preach goodness and compassion to you either."

He was before her already. On a single knee, hand reaching out to her before it came to rest upon her broken hand, where blood still leaked. It soaked his fingers. Blood that had his own coursing through it - warm and pleasant to the touch, with a thick coppery scent already invading his senses.

"But I will tell you right now that you're not a curse. You are of my blood, you are wanted, and I am so very glad that you are alive this very moment." Mordecai tenderly tore his hand from hers and placed it in front of her face. "This is proof that your heart still beats, that you are alive."

There was definitely something in his eye. Or eyes. The Sith Lord blinked away the blurriness just once, composing himself.

He rose swiftly and drew his head near. One hand cupped the side of her head, bloody fingers sliding through fair hair, as he pressed his lips to her forehead for just a moment.

"I love you, Evelynn, my little niece."

[member="Evelynn"]

 

[Beatrice Govan]

Enough?

No, never enough.

With his words came the anticipation of punishment. Eager for it. Every face met was a potential for grim unbalanced retribution, and it would satisfy every single one of her grim desires. With eyes still shut she waited...

...but there were only words, half-muffled through the blood that thrummed hard in her ears.

Still half caught in the thrall of her mania twin emeralds snapped open to stare with both need and confusion. Before her he knelt, a hand atop her frenzied destruction. Desire screamed for him to grab it and twist, to feed the hunger and sate her thirst. That would not happen. His touch was gentle, his rough war-lived hands in direct contrast with the soft delicate flesh produced in laboratory.

Her uncle's words tugged, trying to pull Evelynn down from her self-inflicted manic high. Things that she had never heard before. Things that she had needed to hear a very long time ago. Was it too late? Had she already crossed the threshold into the abyss, where humanity was all but spent and there was naught to be found but insanity?

The girl didn't know, and that scared her the most.

Concepts were easier in the definite. Had there been no glimmer of hope then there was nothing else to lose, it would have been over and she would have been free to cast herself to oblivion and rot. Did it feel possible that there was something beyond this? Not a curse? Wanted? That her life existed to be more than her mind's wicked desires?

Love? What did that even feel like?

She didn't know.

Glassy eyes became contagious as she looked to him, her jackal's grin crumbling and giving way to ragged breaths that were a precursor to sobbing whimpers long overdue. There was no pride, or dignity to prevent those tears as she collapsed forward off of her chair, burying her face into his chest as if to suggest there might have been hope. Evelynn melted from one extreme to another.

“I don't...I don't know...what to do...”

Words stumbled in heavy between great bare sobs, the kind that gave cause to gasp between each blubbering tone. Her non-broken fingers grasped at his arm, clinging onto the fabric of his clothing as if she might have fallen into the void if she didn't.

“...please, help me...”

-

[member="Mordecai Zambrano"]

 

[Mordecai Zambrano]

His breath became ragged, just as much as hers did. The whimpers and the sobbing got to him. Copper still hung in the air, a wretched aftertaste of a burden finally dropped. Mordecai felt his shoulders sag as the girl clutched him, her voice muffled against his black robes. Despite her sobbing and the shaking of her lithe frame, he couldn't help but just grin and hold her so.

Brawny arms came around her frame, pulling her deeper into him. His chin gently rested upon her head.

"It's okay, let it all out." Rough hands rubbed her back. The whimpers echoed about the viewing box. Rhaegos was still, just for a moment, before he too joined the embrace. A snort spouted from his nostrils as he finally rose his lumbering weight to rest his snout against the pair. His scales were warm, soothing.

"You're no burden, and I'm sorry that all happened to you." Mordecai whispered, his words barely audible.

Then he shook too. His chest rumbling with quiet laughter.

"I-I'm not sure if this is appropriate for the moment," the Sith Lord giggled, "But my wife is one hell of a cook if you're interested in having dinner with us. And she's a nurse by practice, so she'll be able to take care of that hand of yours.

"You're welcome to stay with my family if you'd like. I mean, Rhae likes you too."

The Arkanian dragon gave a curt snort from below.

"Just don't break any more fingers, please."

[member="Evelynn"]

 

[Beatrice Govan]

What was this?

Comfort?

There was still an edge of anticipation within her, and it waited, as if nothing positive could be true. As if it could all be a trap and that her father would step out from the shadows having designed one more insidious and ironic form of torture. Always expected, holding her hostage upon the edge of trust.

Evelynn could not halt her tears, still sobbing vigorously into his chest, no doubt leaving a damn patch on his robes. It was as if those tears had been built up over the decades of both death and horrific life and all that it took was one sympathetic hand to send it all collapsing.

“...I don't want to...be this...”

Even the dragon joined them, a carnivorous beast showing the woman more compassion with a single snout than all the faces of her past combined. It would have been funny were it not so tragic.

When the baritone vibrations of his chuckle gave cause for her to pull back her head, bloodshot emeralds searching upwards towards him. He invited her into his home. As if it was normal, as if she was welcome, and as if he meant all the words that they said, that they weren't just hollow promises to placate this problem child.

“You would...” a large sniffle broke up Evelynn's sentence as she tried to form the right words, the sleeve of her robes being used to wipe away her leaking features, “...take me in?”

There doubts however, concerns. A small voice niggled, he'll grow sick of you, he will know there's no hope for you.

He'll give up.

That voice had to be blinked away alongside her tears as she sought the sincerity in his face. He meant it, and who else was there for her to turn to?

“What about father...? Won't...won't he be mad?”

-

[member="Mordecai Zambrano"]

 

[Mordecai Zambrano]

His childlike laughter soon faded into nothingness as bleary eyes peered up at him. Mordecai still hadn't let her go, as if loosening even by an inch would see her fall into her self-destructive pit of despair again. Not that he thought that would happen again, because he knew it would. Too vulnerable, too precious... too human. He was a little shocked too, at how he'd been so moved by the recantation of her tale. He guessed it was from asking himself what his wife would do in these situations.

It was all catching up to him. She'd been rubbing off on him far too much. Not that he minded. Carly had been his stone for the past two decades of his life. Always there, always faithful, and always there to listen to the corruption that threatened to blacken his heart. After every campaign she simply waited for him. Carly was ever the listener, letting her husband revel in tales of glorious combat or patiently listen to horror stories of extermination and genocide.

The stories of the children hurt her the most, yet she never pushed him away. The Sith Lord owed her a lot more than he'd given her. Maybe an early retirement was due? He and Rhaegos were getting older, with he in his late forties and the dragon exponentially past that age in dragon years.

They didn't even have children. No time for them. Always on the move.

Mordecai turned his thoughts outwards again, smiling at his niece. "Of course you can stay with me. You are my blood and I will take care of you like you're my own." Then she mentioned his brother. He scoffed at the thought. "He will not lay a finger on you, ever. My brother leaves me to my own devices. In exchange, I go to war for him. You will be fine with me, dear Evelynn."

He gave her another squeeze, sighing.

[member="Evelynn"]

 

[Beatrice Govan]

Was this what it was supposed to be like?

Family. It was a word that split opinion on what it meant. Some saw family only through the eyes of blood, and beyond that link it was to be disregarded, one couldn't choose their family after all. For others, it meant everything, family was a life long bond with one another, it didn't necessarily mean getting along but to a degree it at least meant being there when things got heavy. Those kinds of families lived and died by each other in the end.

Evelynn had no definition for it.

With a father so cruel and a mother so absent, family meant nothing.

Her mother had noble intentions, in that moment with her uncle she could at least understand that. Karin Dorn's aim had been to keep her in the obscurity of Dantooine's plains in a quaint cottage near a small village, never knowing anything beyond the humdrum of every day life. Her mother however, was still a Sith, and for long periods of time had left her on her own while certain affairs were handled. It had taught the girl independence at the very least and the introduction of a Kath Hound for company attempted to ease the loneliness but it wasn't enough. How can you possibly keep the galaxy hidden away from a girl like that?

“Chomp,” she suddenly whispered, her face hit by sudden epiphany giving her cause to wipe away her tears with some vigour, “My Kath Hound, he...he was called Chomp. I-I couldn't remember, no matter how hard I tried, I thought it was lost to me...”

Was there really hope?

Perhaps in another universe, in another reality there was an Evelynn who was the daughter of one Mordecai and Carly Zambrano. A healthy and happy young woman who understood what family meant, and who took a mischievous dragon out for a walk in her father's stead to give the old man some rest and a bit of peace and quiet.

That would never be the truth where they stood, but there was a small comfort to be taken in that thought alone.

“Thank you, uncle,” came her earnest voice that was once again finding more stable footing, “I cannot imagine how I will ever make this up to you.”

Her brow furrowed, small creases in her forehead giving away that thoughts were being deliberated, but with the lack of more broken fingers and manic words spewing forth it could at least be stated that these were more ordinary considerations.

“You have already offered me so much, but I wish to ask for something else,” Evelynn started, a smaller sniff between words this time as she settled into some form of normality and away from a blubbering wreck, “I need your help. Father wishes for me to join the Sith Brotherhood, and...I do not know if I am...strong enough not to succumb, and you, you have made it this far with your humanity still intact.”

The much smaller woman looked up to him, her features still drained by torment but with a small glint of determination held within those emeralds.

“Will you guide me?”

-

[member="Mordecai Zambrano"]

 

[Mordecai Zambrano]

Behind the facade of a manic, masochistic Sith came forth someone that once was. Perhaps this was akin to her past life, where she was a pleasant, shy girl prone to smiling and utterly satisfied by the menial labors of life. Playing with her hound, eagerly awaiting her mother's return, and enjoying the peace and solidarity of Dantooine. In another life perhaps, she would've been left alone, never to have been discovered by his brother.

Mordecai couldn't bring himself to let her go. Warmth radiated off of her like a furnace. The cold-blooded reptile beneath them had already began to curl his massive frame around them, soaking in whatever he possibly could. Rhaegos gave a grumble of content.

"You don't need to make anything up to me, Evelynn. Just promise me that you won't hurt yourself anymore," his voice rumbled as he reached down to tenderly touch her shattered fingers. He grimaced at the sight of blood slowly drying, caking her pale lithe fingers. His own resembled hers, covered in dried blood from her own self-inflicted wounds.

He wiped a tear away with a clean finger.

"I will guide you, my niece. Your place in this Brotherhood will be by my side, and that of my family's." Mordecai smiled. "And on that note, please let me apologize in advance. Carly will dote over you for weeks if you let her. She's even more cuddly and sappy than I am."

[member="Evelynn"]