Private Relationships Are Hard

[Iris Arani]

Iris wasn't painting. She hadn't for a couple days now. Probably the most alarming thing to notice about the younger Padawan. Even though she shared the living space with Briana Sal-Soren in their hideaway apartment, she'd never been shy about painting. Yet now she was just sitting on the couch, knees to her chest, reading through a datapad on.. Relationships. Holonovels and such, none of which really made any sense. She'd been through a couple in the past couple of days, and none of it clicked with how she was feeling. Mostly. Some parts did, but..

She sighed, clicking off the device before setting it aside. "This sucks."

 

[Briana Sal-Soren]

Themes: XoXo
Tag: Iris Arani

When Briana walked into their shared apartment, she immediately noticed that Iris was still laid out on the couch, a holopad in hand and her paint left untouched. Shrugging off her jacket, and kicking off her shoes, Briana went back out, disappearing briefly through the door, only to come back with what appeared to be an easel and pristine white canvases tucked beneath her arms.

"So, guess what? There's a new art store that popped up next to that one store we like." Briana tried to smile, setting up the easel and canvas in front of the younger girl in hopes it might entice her creativity. "They had a sale, so I thought I'd grab a few for you." A bold faced lie. There'd been no sale... art supplies were really frakking expensive, but she was willing to try and, or, pay anything, that might get Iris back to normal. "Why don't you get your paints? Hmm? I'll even paint with you, for a change."

One would think that not having Iris paint the apartment in days would be a relief, truly, Briana herself never fathomed a world in which she actually tried to encourage her to pick up a paintbrush and go hog-wild... but here they were. Truthfully, she'd rather have Iris happily painting crazy colors over everything she set her eyes on, being her innocent, vibrant self, than the sulky, careworn Iris that'd been moping around.

After a few minutes of silence, her rosebud lips fell into a frown. "You still don't want to paint?" she asked, trying to keep the disappointment from her tone and coming to sit down beside Iris. "What's going on with you lately? Why haven't you been painting? You're starting to worry me."

 

[Iris Arani]

Iris didn't respond. Instead, she pulled out one of the charms. The same one that had Kai Bamarri 's name on it. And just.. Stared. Her mind was blurry with way too differing thoughts for her to think clearly. At first she didn't even realize Briana Sal-Soren was there, talking about new paints. Any other time and yeah, it absolutely would've pulled her attention. Now? She just sighed and closed her eyes.

"What's going on with you lately? Why haven't you been painting? You're starting to worry me."

"I'm in love with Kai." No, she didn't beat around the bush or such. She sat up, turning her gaze towards Briana with the confused as ever expression. "I told him, and he said that would change things normally. But also it didn't? And I don't know if it will? I-" She hummed, trying to figure out her words for a moment.

"I'm trying to figure out what that all means. I don't think he likes that I don't know what I want with it."

 

[Briana Sal-Soren]

Themes: XoXo
Tag: Iris Arani

Briana blinked a few slow times as the idea of Iris being in love with someone settled into her brain, before the gentle shadow of a smile passed over her lips. "You're in love with Kai, hm?" Briana echoed thoughtfully, her glossy chestnut hair spilling over her shoulder as her head tilted, her eyes focused on Iris while she spoke.

A thick brow arched and she folded her hands in her lap, quiet as she gathered her own thoughts together.

"I can't pretend I know the answers here," she admitted. "But, I know what love looks like." Time and again her parents had demonstrated it. Not always spoken a loud, but felt in the unsaid, too. Sometimes a quiet thing, like the oxygen one needed to breath.

Though she never spoke of her own girlish-notions and dreams, Briana had them, tucked away where others couldn't poke and prod.

The love reflected in the eyes of her parents? She wanted to find love like that, too. One day. The ideal, in her mind.

"My mother always told me that love isn't a linear thing that someone just 'figures out'," she hummed quietly, trying to figure out a way she could explain an emotion she'd not experienced herself yet, and feeling entirely out of her depth. "She said, 'Love is something that is constantly changing... and growing. It's not always easy to parse,'" a quick inhale. "and it's okay that you don't know what you want with it yet. It's an exploration... a journey...that you take with someone...at least, I think so."

 

[Iris Arani]

".. But what if you don't know if they love you?" Her gaze lowered from Briana Sal-Soren as she pulled her knee to her chest. Hiding most of her face in them, really. "Should I even try to figure it out with him if he doesn't know? .. I don't want to burden him with anything. He's.. It's difficult enough for him already." No, she couldn't tell her a lot about Kai. Some just weren't her things to share.

"Maybe staying friends is better?"