Talk To me

[Alric Kuhn]

Alric stepped slowly out onto the balcony.

It had been a few hours since Rose had left, and Alric could feel that something was wrong. Danger had slipped from his grasped and walked away from him, moving out of his embrace as if she were somewhat scared of it. That had not sat well with him, though he had figured it was only nerves. Since then she had avoided him, moved around the fortress opposite his pace. He had left her alone for a time, letting her think and settle herself.

Finally he had decided it was enough.

He found her, or rather he asked one of the men where she was.

She stood quietly on one of the balconies of the stronghold, her back straight and her eyes set forward in a heavy stare. Alric watched her for a few moments, then slowly began to walk up behind her. He made no secret of his presence, never could have even if he tried. Slowly he moved up beside her.

For a moment Alric was simply quiet, not saying anything, then his hand swept over and took her own. She resisted at first, but his palm gently clasped around her in an unwavering grasp. Alric pulled himself closer, and tipped her chin with his hand, pushing her eyes to meet his own. "Talk to me."

 

[Danger Arceneau]

[member="Alric Kuhn"]

His fingers would lift her chin with steady pressure. As much as she wanted to avoid it, she couldn't when the probing blue of his eyes would search her own. There was concern there. Worry. Alric wore his emotions on his sleeve, everything he felt was bare to read across his expression. Within his eyes.

It only made it worse.

Her lids lowered, her lashes attempting to veil her eyes. Despite the hours left to try and figure out what to do, the more Danger let her mind saturate and over analyze the situation, the more she came to the bleak realization of what she had to do. Whatever it was that she and Alric were doing, it clearly was affecting Rose. Her reaction, her unease. It was clear that it greatly disturbed her. And with how delicate the situation was between Alric and the twins, Danger didn't want to be in any way a hindrance in that.

There was visible strain over Danger's expression, tension over her brow. He wanted to talk, she understood that. But she didn't want to do that right now.

However, the man was stubborn now as he had been then. Rose may not have seen that side of Alric, but Danger knew better.

She gave him a weak smile. "Just have a lot of things on my mind."

"You should probably go back to the Skyhook." Danger began, lightly brushing the hand that held her chin up to the side. "I have some work to do here that needs to get done."

 

[Alric Kuhn]

[member="Danger Arceneau"]

He shook his head.

Alric hated Tatooine. He despised it. Good things never seemed to happen for him here. Maybe that was just bad timing, bad luck, or maybe some wicked sand witch had cursed him before he even stepped foot here. Despite that, however, he intended to stay put. Leaving her behind seemed...wrong. They were still supposed to be on vacation together, still supposed to be doing things. He had a surprise waiting for her back home, and he wouldn't have that ruined.

"I'm not going anywhere without you." He said quietly, squeezing her hand gently.

The Tetan could tell that something was wrong, but he waited for her to broach the subject.

He was stubborn of course, and he would not allow her to sit on it forever, but perhaps a few minutes to let her collect herself, gather her thoughts. Danger would know that he wouldn't stop, that he couldn't stop. It was who he was, it wasn't in him. He wanted to help, he wanted to make things better.

 

[Danger Arceneau]

[member="Alric Kuhn"]

He didn't get it.

Granted, some things had to be broken down for Alric to see. To understand. A deep, weary sigh would draw in an exhale from Danger's lungs. Her free hand came up to pinch the bridge of her nose, and once again, she would attempt to draw her hand away from his.

"Alric," she began, green eyes coming up to level upon his own, her hand falling to her side. " Now ain't the time to be stubborn about it." her low voice would drift with a heavy drawl, an acceptance. That meeting with Rose made everything perfectly clear.

"You should visit Lily. Get on with her, check on her." the redhead would add. "I've my own concerns to look to, and having you focus on them is only right."

 

[Alric Kuhn]

[member="Danger Arceneau"]

He let out a sigh.

Was that what this was about? The girls? Had her meeting with Rose shaken her? Had it effected the fears she already had before? Alric frowned, looking down at her as his fingers slipped away from her grasp. He frowned at her, and his eyes closed for half a second. A deep breath pulled into his lungs, and he shook slightly. Was she really going to do this? Was she really going to push him away? Did she think she knew what was best for him? For Lily and Rose? Could she really be thinking that she wasn't fit for his life? Did she think that he could just let her go?

No.

He wouldn't let this happen.

"Don't do this, Danger." He said as he took a step closer to her, pressing into her personal space. "You're not going to do this."

His tone became stronger, more defined, entering with purpose. "You're not going to shut me out and push me away."

 

[Danger Arceneau]

[member="Alric Kuhn"]

Eyes would grow wider as the Tetan took a step forward, breaching her personal space. It wasn't the action that would alarm her; it was the purpose of his tone, the seriousness of his expression, the way a nerve would tick right at the corner of his jaw. He normally would loom over her, but when he did so by closing the space between them, it only made her all the more aware of it.

An uncomfortable shift would play across her body, and she took a step back, a rare tell of the emotional state she was in. Her lips drew into a straight line.

"Alric... be reasonable." she would begin to plead with him, exhaustion in her eyes. It was true, the underlying fears that she had of just how her presence would affect the twins only cemented itself after talking to Rose today. Having a stranger in their midst would only do more harm than good.

"You're all those girls have left and it makes sense to not stir the pot with something they ain't familiar with. It's been less than a year since their mother's death," there she did it. Mentioned it aloud. "Ain't no wonder that they are still going through their grieving. You saw how Rose took just a fraction of the truth; filtered as much as one could, but even then she ran out of her like a bat out of the Nine Hells. What if she finally got the notion to come visit you and found me instead? Then what? "

Her frustration was starting to grow apparent. It was in the growing flush of her cheeks, in the gestures she made in emphasis. "It ain't right to change things on them. What they need is you, and having me in any manner ain't gonna serve them nor you any good."

She shook her head.

"No, it is best you get on going now and do what you will with Lily and Rose. Least until things are right between them and you."

 

[Alric Kuhn]

[member="Danger Arceneau"]

"Are you kidding me?" That same tone, that same strong, bold tone that seemed to push onto Danger instead of simply lingering in the ears.

He was at a loss for words. Alric had known this had been her fear, that she had thought Lily and Rose would reject her, that she would get in the way, that she was ruining things. He had known that was her fear. The fear of true commitment, of letting herself have what she wanted. In a way, it was an excuse. It was a way for Danger to get out, to allow herself to not dive into that wave of happiness. It was a way for her to return to what over the last years had become normal to her.

Alric couldn't accept that. "I can't do that, Danger."

His authoritative tone still clung to him, but it was hinted with resignation.

"I love my daughters." He said his hand reaching out to grasp her own again, his eyes settling hard on her own. "I would do anything for them. I came back for them, I raised them, I took care of them. I did everything I could for them, and I will keep doing everything I can for them. I love Lily and Rose with all of my heart."

Alric squeezed her hand. "But I also love you."

He had never said that to her. They had been together for months, and the feeling had perhaps been there, had perhaps always been there, but he had never said it openly. His expression didn't change, his tone only softened slightly, the hard point of it still needed to drill through Danger's thick skull.

"Everything I am. Everything I've done for the girls, their entire existence, It couldn't have happened without you." He shook slightly, if only because it was a truth he should have long admitted. "You changed me in so many ways. What happened with us, what we went through. Tatooine, The Star Cabal, Fiona, everything, all of it. You opened my eyes, you helped me grow into the person that I am. Without you, Lily and Rose wouldn't exist, without you I would have died in some seedy nightclub at thirty three."

"You're not Silara. You're not their mother, but you're also not a replacement for her." Those words were strong. Danger wasn't some trophy he had taken, she wasn't some woman that he had simply decided to shack up with because Lily and Rose needed a new mom. That wasn't what she was to him, that would never be what she was to him.

"I love you." He said it again. "I love you for all that you've done for me. For all that you are, and for all that you've ever been."

For a moment Alric simply let those words hang in the air. Maybe Danger had known that, maybe she hadn't. It didn't matter to him because he knew it was the truth. His daughters were everything to him, but Danger had a special place in his heart right besides them. "I want to do what's best for Lily and Rose,, but I can't do my best without you."

 

[Danger Arceneau]

[member="Alric Kuhn"]

Her heart was jack-hammering through her ears, it was hard to discern if what she was hearing was real.

There wasn't any way it would be. He wouldn't say that to her. She hadn't expected it, given up on the possibility of hearing him say it. In her mind, she had settled to a position where she was simply living day by day. Where she was content at where she stood at. Where she stood when it came between she and he.

But then he kept talking. He wouldn't stop. She barely registered the firm hold of his hand again, the way his grip would hold fast against her own. How he'd draw her closer, the blue of his gaze seeming to penetrate her as he kept emphasizing what she never once considered, but had often dreamed in mere fantasies, the extent of his emotions for her. What he thought. What he felt.. for her.

I love you.

The blood drained from her face, and for a second his chiseled, scruffy visage would blur. A knot grew in her throat, and she found herself holding tightly to his hand. Knuckles white, she struggled to say something, anything, but found herself at a loss for words.

He loves me? Her eyes would start to sting, hot pinpricks of tears shimmering in her eyes.

"W-what?" she finally would choke out, near disbelief in her voice. It was as if she was expecting him to take it back. As if it wasn't real. As if she was imagining him saying that. It was fear that held her back. It was that horrible, wretched fear of rejection. Of being abandoned. Of not being good enough. Of placing herself out there again only to have all that she cared for wretched from her grasp. That is why she had convinced herself that she would take whatever Alric was willing to give. In whatever form.

She was happy simply being beside him, and if the girls would be better off if she wasn't there... then she wouldn't stand in the way. There was a tremble in her hand, and she realized it wasn't just her, but the Tetan as well.

Blinking rapidly, Danger attempted to bring the former Titan back into focus. To say something more. But it was hard to breathe. Her emotions were rising and falling with the sudden lurch of an oncoming storm. The last time Alric Kuhn had even spoken about love, about what he felt, had been for another over Corellia, when she had helped him discover an awareness to the emotion towards another.

All the while hiding her own.

 

[Alric Kuhn]

[member="Danger Arceneau"]

There wasn't more much that he could say. Everything had spilled from him. All of his reasons, all of this thoughts, all of his feelings for Danger. He had already told her everything. He had no more grand speeches, he had nothing more to add to what was already said. Maybe that was a weakness, maybe for once, his silver tongue was failing him. He saw the tears in her eyes, and he felt the clamping of her hand down onto his own. Alric wanted to say something, but he was at a loss for words.

If she wasn't already convinced, then there was nothing he could do.

"I love you." He reiterated his words, summing up everything that he had said.

It really was that easy. That simple. Maybe if he had said it sooner, she wouldn't have had that wretched feeling after meeting Rose. Maybe she would have found herself in a more secure state, maybe he could have stopped all this. Yet it had taken seeing her in a panic, seeing her breaking down for him to say it. Alric in the end was a weak man, and the only one that now gave him strength was Danger.

 

[Danger Arceneau]

[member="Alric Kuhn"]

Was it really that easy? Doubt would whisper in her ear. That simple? Fear would twist the words in another. Her demons warred a battle inside her mind, battling second guesses and excuses. In the end, Danger gave a shudder, her vision clearing as tears began rolling down her cheeks.

There the facade of the Queen of Trade lay utterly broken, and in her stead was simply a woman. A woman with a lifetime of baggage, of insecurities, and desires. The trio attached to Alric Kuhn in some way or another, for there was no other man who can make her feel as self conscious as he stirred an insatiable need of him. A love for him that bore itself down to her bones and would not leave. He was baked into her as the white of bleached bones, and as endless as the dunes of the Western Sea.

By Inari the Reviver, did she ever love that man. Always had. Always would. His was a love she couldn't run from. And seeing him standing before her, saying the words that were like fresh spring water to a parched throat was enough to send Danger over the edge.

Because all one had to do was see it in his eyes. It wasn't the words as much as the way he was looking at her then; as if she was the sole thing that would steady his foundation. As if just for that moment, Danger was brought out into the sunlight and finally felt the warmth of the sun.

Her lips wobbled, and Danger caught her breath. A pressure rose in her chest. A sudden, twisting, all encompassing sensation that came from the pit of her belly and spread like wildfire, igniting every nerve. Before she knew it, Danger tugged him closer. It was all instinct now. Sometimes the heart know's its true desires, but instead of acting on it, it hesitates. Danger couldn't let herself hesitate. Hesitating would only invite more doubts.

Hesitating would end for today.

Her hand went sailing over him, grabbing fistfuls of his shirt and drawing him down to her. The salt of her tears and the taste of whiskey soon came rolling into Alric's mouth as the woman pressed her lips against his. Her arms went snaking around him, tugging him close.

In between the embrace, three words would float across the sultry desert night.

"I love you."