Taming the Tempest (Siobhan)

[Tempest]

The order had been pretty clear.
Report to Colonel Kerrigan for training and instruction at 9:00 in the training room.

Now Tempest had a pretty cynical view of the world, and when it came to Siobhan Kerrigan a pretty suspicious one too.
Questions flickered through her mind. Which training room? What sort of instruction? Should I wear that leather outfit she likes?

It dawned on her that after their recent combat missions Siobhan might actually be wanting to train her in practical combat lessons. And to use the Force.

Suddenly all her amusement vanished and she stopped. The Force was something of a personal shame for her. It came when she was angry…and she was often angry…but the lack of control was something she found unsettling. Siobhan could control the Force, Tempest could not.

Reluctantly she headed for the training room, hoping against hope that it was going to be a fun romp, but now suspecting otherwise.

 

[Siobhan Kerrigan]

@[member="Tempest"]

As far as training rooms went it was pretty standard. The hall was rather wide, opening plenty of opportunities for sparring, there were training dummies lined up and several racks filled to the brim with weapons.


At the press of a button droids would enter the room through one of the adjourning chambers - these could range from remotes and run of the mill training droids to the elite commando models that could give a Jedi trouble. Moreover, there was a long shooting range that gave ample opportunity to test out bolters, blasters and such.

Siobhan stood at the end of the hall next to a table that contained a variety of weapons. She was dressed in a pair of tight-fitting workout pants and a black tank top - this was actual work, so there was little hint of the decadent aristo that had gone femme to an extent it seemed Tegaea's plan had worked out perfectly -, exposing scarred but toned arms. Outwardly it would perhaps be less noticeable, but deep down Siobhan was quite nervous as well. She knew about Tempest's anger and trust issues...mainly because she had those as well in spades. She had sensed that the woman was sensitive to the Force, though not said anything until now. Partly it had not been her place, partly, well, until recently she had been more focused on the black woman's other qualities. Siobhan was just a wee bit self-centred after all!

Moreover, there was a nagging sense of self-doubt, a feeling that she herself would not be up to the task. Hence why before entering she had been smoking more cigarettes than her lung would like, as indicated by the number of stubbed out cigarette butts that filled the trash. She was not much of a teacher...


She cast that thought out of the metaphorical airlock as the woman entered and gave her what hopefully was an encouraging smile.

"Hi, Tempest. Thanks for coming. Hope you had a bite to eat because this is gonna get intense and quite tiring. I'll get straight to the point. I've been reviewing your performance - you've done good - and decided you could benefit from training. Yes, actual training, you've got the other sort down pat!" this lame joke was probably what she took as being the height of wittiness.


"In the light of the fact that you're going to spending a great deal of your time on combat ops. Training in ranged and melee weapons...and in the Force - if you want to become proficient in its use. How long have you known that you were sensitive to it?"she asked bluntly, unsprisingly, but then beating around the bush seemed pointless to her.

 

[Tempest]

@[member="Siobhan Kerrigan"]

At first Tempest was pleased that everything was going better than planned. She was about to offer a witty retort.
Then the Force came up and her mood darkened. Her eye twitched.

“I don’t want to talk about it, Sio,” she said flatly. “I’m happy to train with weapons or whatever else, but I don’t want to deal with any hocus pocus stuff.”

That was her final word, or so she thought.

 

[Siobhan Kerrigan]

@[member="Tempest"]

"Tempest, you know it's not hocus pocus. Do I look like the mutter incantations type to you? I don't have the patience for mystical crap like that. Harnessed properly, the Force is a weapon, no matter what Jedi might babble about it."

Unfortunately for Tempest Siobhan was stubborn. Well, that and she was a hypocrite who seemed to think she knew best...because she did. Or so she thought.

"You don't want to talk about it...that's fine. I...don't wanna pry," she spoke softly.

"But this is an opportunity for you. A big one. With the work Firemane is doing, chances are you will end up fighting forcers...and they won't hold back at all. They'll use every weapon in their arsenal, like anyone smart does. Even if you don't want to embrace it, some training would be advised to make sure you have some measure of control over it." In order to avoid unwillingly lashing out with it.

 

[Tempest]

@[member="Siobhan Kerrigan"]
Tempest scowled at Siobhan. “I’ve done perfectly fine up to now,” she said defensively. “You have this power, and you can do big things with it. I’m not like that…mine has only ever brought me misery and fear,” she added heavily.

“I’ll take my chances with Sith or Jedi or whoever tries to fight me. I’m not one of them, and I’m not you. I could never have that control and power – and I don’t want it anyway.”

There was obviously some deep trauma here, and if Siobhan did want to train her she would have to be subtle in her approach.

 

[Siobhan Kerrigan]

@[member="Tempest"]

Siobhan looked contrite at having set off what was clearly a traumatic memory. Handling Tempest required something she was not used to...subtlety and a little something called empathy.

"I'm sorry. I'm not denigrating what you accomplished. I...don't think you're lesser without using the Force. If you don't want it...I won't insist. Having the Force can be a curse...or a great gift." she said softly, in what she hoped was a more soothing tone.

"Tell you the truth, I never thought I'd make it when Adril said I could use the Force, I was afraid of...everything that could go wrong. All the misery it could cause."

 

[Tempest]

@[member="Siobhan Kerrigan"]
Tempest paused awkwardly. She had been about to turn on her heel and leave, but paused.
“Yeah, it’s never done me much good, Sio. But…if you can help me control it, I guess that’s good.”
She turned to face her friend. “But you’re not turning me into a weapon, understand? I’m not going to become Battering Ram Junior – I’m doing this so I don’t have to use them, got it?” she insisted vehemently.

 

[Siobhan Kerrigan]

@[member="Tempest"]

One might wonder whether Siobhan would be capable of showing her anything else. After all, the only thing she knew about the Force was how to kill people and cause destruction with it. Well, upon reflection, she was good at finding creative ways to use the Force for non-PG 13 things as well! Perhaps she had found the Forbidden Holocron.

Siobhan seemed a bit taken aback but then nodded. "If there were two of us around I don't think Firemane would get any jobs because we'd never get out of bills for destroyed buildings. One version of me is high maintenance enough," she tried to joke, though her sense of humour was probably rather lame. One version of herself was quite enough to deal with though!

"I won't show you anything you don't want to. If you wanna deepen it beyond that that's your choice. Right, some theory first. As I said the Force can be a curse...or a great gift if you can exercise control over it. It's an energy field created by all life that gives Jedi, Sith and so on their power. In principle it flows through all living things - with some exceptions, those we call force dead, but that's not important right now - but only comparatively very few are sensitive to it and tap into its energies to perform incredible feats, control and shape the world around them. It's often been compared to a river that flows and binds this world together, if you want to get poetic." Needless to say she was not the poetic type.

"If I was a Jedi I'd give you some lecture about doing the 'will of the Force' and similar mystical mumbo jumbo, only I never believed in that sort of thing. Saying you're doing its will just sounds like you're trying to evade responsibility for your actions to me...or make yourself sound noble and righteous by claiming a higher power's chosen you. I'm no mystic and to me the Force is very powerful, if used wrongly the consequences can be devastating, but to me it is a can opener. A very powerful one you don't want to use wrongly, but that's what it is. Jedi would divide the Force into the Light and Dark Side and say that the latter is like a daemon ready to pounce on naughty Jedi, whispering into their mind so that they fall. The old school ones would claim that passion itself makes you succumb to it - that's before they get thrown into a real war and see what hell it is, that even 'white hats' have to do nasty things to win and evil doesn't just come in black robes, red lightsabres and veiny skin. Don't get me wrong, darkness exists, there's temptation, evil...but if there's a 'Dark Side' it's a door...people choose to walk through it."

Needless to say Siobhan's perspective on Jedi teachings might be rather...biased and possibly superficial. She did not fully subscribe to Potentium - saying that your intent was good was pretty useless if your actions spoke otherwise, better having self-serving intentions if the result was benign - but she did not have any mystical inclinations. Explaining her views was still awkward for her, mostly because she seldom actually bothered thinking about them. The Force was just there, she knew how to manipulate and did so without much reflection. As Phylis had been quite right in thinking, Siobhan did in fact play fast and loose with morality and the dark side.

"If you want to hear the Force, you need to quiet yourself and reach inside your being. Finding some measure of calm is hard...I myself struggled for ages with it. You know I'm not...even-tempered or particularly patient. What I try while meditating is to concentrate on what makes me happy, good memories, the causes I fight for; you will hear it then. People describe it as the sound of a rushing river, some as the constant ratter of rain, it seems to vary based on the person. What's sure is that it's a current, creating disturbances and waves. Once you're opened up to it your senses feel expanded, more alive, much like you've woken up and are using them to their full potential for their first time," she raised her hand at that.

"Course, lots of Jedi and Sith make the mistake of relying purely on it. Hence why they're screwed if they ever get close to ysalamiri who negate the Force. So you're right to keep up on your conventional combat training. You never know when you might lose 'magic' powers." Given that she and Adril had lost their powers after a fade confrontation with Shadow and had went on a perilious quest to find an ancien force machine to regain them, she was speaking from experience here. She paused, clearing her throat after talked for so long, waiting for Tempest to ask anything, otherwise they would soon proceed to the most challenging part of Force training...meditation and levitating tiny objects.

 

[Tempest]

@[member="Siobhan Kerrigan"]

Tempest listened intently, which was hard for her. She wasn't good at listening to long speeches, but she persisted. At the end she felt she understood things a but better.
"I didn't know it was like that. I've never really paid much attention to it. I thought it was just...well...in individual people, like you or me. I didn't know it was everywhere!"
She'd not exactly had a classical education. Siobhan had been the first person she'd met who could use the Force, and her beliefs were coloured and shaped by that.
"So...so when we're using the Force, are we taking it out of ourselves? Is it like emptying a water tank? Or can you keep using it forever?"
Not the best way of explaining it, but it was all very new to her.

 

[Siobhan Kerrigan]

@[member="Tempest"]

"Same here. If something's not clear or I'm going too fast, do say so." For her part Siobhan was not good at listening to speeches either - or giving them. She felt like she needed a cigarette, but then this was nothing new. However, it took some thinking to explain a concept that she had taken as a given for so long. It had been more than a decade since she had been trained as Adril's Padawan, so obviously it was not easy to put herself back into the position of someone like Tempest.

"Let's say that the river itself is infinite but there's only so much water you can put out of it into your water tank," she said, following Tempest's analogy. "If you have the Force it is with you forever - well, there are ways to sever someone from it, but let's not go there now - and you will not exhaust its use, but using it takes energy. So at the start at least you'll have to empty plenty of your water tank to perform force feats, the flashy stuff will drain a lot of it and you'll need time to replenish. Those reserves expand over time."

Probably not the best explanation, but perhaps it would work. "As for what you exactly do when you use the Force, Jedi divide it into three aspects: Control, Sense, Alter. That's obviously arbitrary, but Control is recognising the Force inside you and using it to control your body. Like by using its energies to strengthen your muscles and make yourself faster. Sense is the step after that, where you recognise the Force beyond you, that is the river and its currents instead of just your one water tank. In its basic form it's something like a sixth sense. Reach out to the world, feel the life all around you, the power. Deflecting blasterfire with a lightsabre's possible because every forcer has some ability at precog."

Unfortunately, long-distance telepathy was far more difficult than the holovids might suggest. If those were to be believed a Jedi would hold entire conversations using only telepathy, sometimes even with someone from another star system. Siobhan had not been able to verify that because she did not even possess basic telepathy!

"Finally Alter. Now that you've recognised the river you try to manipulate its currents, determine where the stream will go and altering it. You manipulate objects, the environment, other people with the Force. That's with most of the offensive 'powers', like telekinesis, lightning, pyrokinesis. But what matters in any case is this: You envision what you want to want to accomplish, reach out to the Force and will the stream to go the direction you want. Most of the battle's having the willpower and knowing that you can accomplish this, letting go of the idea that this is too 'big' or 'impossible'. The rest is...training."

She was obviously taking Jedi concepts when it came to the aspects, but her view of the Force was as far removed from them as it could be since to her it was mostly a can opener, so it was all about having a handy tool and manifesting the appropriate will to do great things with it. It was a very practical outlook devoid of mysticism...but also meant that she lacked a more refined understanding. As the forcer who shouted instead of heard the ripples, it was highly doubtful that she would ever have access to the more arcane variations of the Force, like batte meditation, shatterpoint, really any sort of mentalism. It also brought her quite close to the dark side.

She levitated two glasses of water from the table, one for herself, the other flying towards Tempest. Perhaps the girl could use one! Siobhan certainly did.

 

[Tempest]

@[member="Siobhan Kerrigan"]
Tempest nodded mutely. It was...well it was frankly all rather confusing. Siobhan was not the best teacher ever, but Tempest was not a very good student. With almost no education, a hard upbringing where the most she ever listened to were orders or commands, she wasn't exactly suited.
"I...think I understand," she said. She likely didn't, but she was a woman of action, not conversation. If she was to learn something it had to be 'in action' as it were.
She took the glass and drunk from it. It was very refreshing!

 

[Siobhan Kerrigan]

@[member="Tempest"]

As far as teachers went there were certainly far better ones than Siobhan. Worse as well? That was a matter of debate. Regardless Siobhan seemed aware of the fact that words were a wasting unless Tempest actually got to find her own way to the Force through trial and error. After all, she herself was a woman of action as well and it was unlikely that Adril's training had consisted of a great deal of theory.

Otherwise Siobhan might have a less warped view of the Jedi Code and way of life.

"You will when we're done," she said confidently, giving Tempest a smile then indicating a spot for her to sit down. Putting the glass back on the table Siobhan likewise sat down, facing Tempest, legs crossed, hands put together, in what was the typical meditative position.

"Now I need you to focus. Take a deep breath and try and concentrate. Try and clear your mind and focus on one thing alone. The reason you fight, why you're with Firemane, what drives you. Your feelings are what gives you strength. Once you have centred yourself, reach out and fixate on this," at that she levitated a small datapad in front of Tempest and placed it on the ground.

"Imagine moving it, reach out with your feelings and envision that you want it to rise. Will it enough and the Force will obey."

 

[Tempest]

@[member="Siobhan Kerrigan"]

Tempest nodded uncertainly. She wasn’t exactly sure how one was supposed to centre themselves or anything like that. Still, Tempest obediently looked at the datapad, trying to concentrate on it. There was a small crack on one side, a place where the colour had worn away due to constantly being held. It was the first time she’d really ever looked at a datapad.

It didn’t move.

Closing her eyes she tried to imagine it moving. When she opened her eyes it was where it had been put.

She stared at it ferociously, straining until her eyes glazed over a little.

Nothing.

She looked up at Siobhan, a mix of embarrassment and questioning in her expression. Clearly something should have happened by now!

 

[Siobhan Kerrigan]

@[member="Tempest"]

This writer freely admits that they find all this 'use the Force' talk rather awkward to write. Saying the Force was a mystical energy field that bound all life together, that one should empty one's mind and open oneself to hearing the ripples was all well good, then reach out to touch its energies, but what did that mean in practice?

Logically it would not even make sense to an educated person, so Tempest, who had spent a good deal of her life as a slave on a third world planet, could hardly be blamed for not comprehending. Fundamentally the Force seemed to defy logical analysis.

Nevertheless, over the millennia countless forceful beings had managed to harness it and become Jedi, Sith, Witches and anything in between. Usually this had resulted in destruction, property damage, planets being vaporised. Would the Galaxy be better off without force-users? Assuredly there would still be war, bloodshed, destruction for this or that reason because that was sentient nature, but it might still be better without force gods who by and large seemed to think they were a law unto themselves. It was not like they were doing much good.

However, that was not the matter at hand here. "You're on the right track. I know it's hard right now, but keep at it. Give it time. You'll find it easier as you go on. Try to relax and focus. The Force will come to you. Making objects move with your mind is about how well you can focus and how much you can will it," Siobhan said encouragingly - or rather attempted to sound like that. She had a feeling she would be doing a lot of that!

 

[Tempest]

@[member="Siobhan Kerrigan"]

This writer fully admits that writing ‘use the Force’ posts are probably the most annoying of all, and require generous amounts of handwaving. However, that was not the point of the previous post.

Tempest tried again, trying to keep calm and focussed. Finally though, after minutes more of failure she sighed and sat back.
“Maybe I can’t do it,” she said. “I know I can, why won’t it just work? Why must it be so difficult!” she demanded, her anger rising. Her name had been chosen for a reason.

She glared at the recalcitrant device, as if it was a mortal enemy. Abruptly the datapad levitated, and prompted by a burst of anger it sped straight at the wall and impacted with a crack! Broken pieces fell to the ground.

Tempest coloured. “I’m so sorry!” she said, her anger replaced with embarrassment.

 

[Siobhan Kerrigan]

@[member="Tempest"]

This writer does not recall claiming it was. Merely wondering whether they were being made fun of since this writer seems to think everything is about them. No, they are not narcissistic at all!

Regardless Tempest had shown that she did in fact have the power, though it was only her rage and frustration that, for want of a better word, 'activated' it. Her name was indeed terribly fitting for her. "Tempest, it's alright, you got nothing to be sorry about. You know how many datapads I broke during training? Let's just say a lot," Siobhan said understandingly as she approached Tempest, giving her shoulder a gentle squeeze and then planting a soft kiss on her cheek.

No doubt Adril had been understanding about the mess! In case anyone was wondering, no Siobhan had not made it up to her that way because things only started getting hot and steamy between them after she had become an experienced Padawan!

A Jedi would have given Tempest a well-intentioned lecture about how anger led to the darkside, how she would have to gain control over her passions, find serenity, inner peace and all that. Which was all well and good but from Siobhan's perspective would be pretty useless. It was not like she did not have serious anger management issues either. From her perspective the key lay more in helping Tempest channel it productively so that she was not ruled by it. If harnessed properly, let loose at the right moment, anger could be a potent weapon.

"See, you have the power. It is bloody frustrating, I know, and I guess all these fancy 'find serenity and use the Force' Jedi sayings are utterly useless. You channel the Force through your anger, you just need control over it so that you can harness and unleash it without letting it overwhelm you. It's like the difference between firing a short controlled burst or a volley with a repeater."

 

[Tempest]

@[member="Siobhan Kerrigan"]
Tempest looked at her, a smile on her lips. "Balance rage and calm, right? Be the eye of the hurricane, sweeping all before you but remaining at the focal point of it. Be the Tempest, not be thrown by it."
She sighed. "OK, but how do you suggest I do that? When I get angry I can't control it, but I can't use it unless I'm angry!"

 

[Siobhan Kerrigan]

@[member="Tempest"]

That was the hundred thousand credit question. Well, perhaps a bit less but you get the point. How to remain in control when you were a volcano set to erupt at any moment. It was something Siobhan had often struggled with. Actually she still did, for even so much had changed in her life for the better she still had a hair-trigger temper and was given to spontaneous rages and bouts of moodiness.

Again a Jedi Master would have delivered a lecture about how fear and anger would inevitably drag one down into the abyss that was the dark side. Only strong discipline, temperance and self-control could save you, for the dark side was always there and seducitve. However, Siobhan had never bothered much with the Jedi Code.

"There's no quickly available recipe for this, alas. First above all, as cliched as it sounds, you have to believe that you can control it. That your it's mistress and not its slave. You got a short fuse - we both have - but you can control the blast. Keep the anger close to you, let it fuel you when need be, but remember that. There will be moments when you'll have to let go completely, absolutely let loose like a storm and hold nothing back," Siobhan said softly, gently patting Tempest's hand.

Of course she could theoretically give Tempest a few more of rounds of trying to levitate a datapad without destroying it, which might eventually yield results but would no doubt be quite frustrating, but a different idea was forming in her mind.

"I think I'll try to do things a bit differently. You've got an affinity for the destructive aspects of the Force and trying to force constraints on you right off the bat won't work. I think it's best to give you some moments to let loose step by step. Give you some playtime and get some of the anger out of your system. Things that require greater calm should come easier to you then. See that training dummy over there. I want you to throw it. Hit it hard, as hard as you can, with the Force."

To an extent Siobhan was drawing on her own experiences here. The small things, those that required focus and calm, had taken longer for her to learn than causing flashy carnage. Some time spent letting loose without trying to constrain herself might make it easier for Tempest to focus later. What Siobhan intended to after training dummies got pounded was to confront her with mobile remotes and actual training droids, which would be set to attack her, though naturally their weapons would be set to only stun or zap her a bit.

 

[Delila Castillon]

@[member="Siobhan Kerrigan"] @[member="Tempest"]

Sweaty and dirty from her time training in a room down the hall, Delila wasn't finished today. She was looking for the dummies she used and abused as punching bags but where no where to be found. Padding down the halls in her bare feet, the redhead was peeking into each training room in search of her lost object. So far her luck wasn't so hot.

Coming into the last room, she spotted Siobhan....doing something. Explaining the Force or some nonsense to some poor girl. Delila certainly felt for the white haired woman. She was either being hit on or completely bored to death. Most likely both.

"Screw your mystical Force and pick up a blaster kid. Better than trying to remember a bunch of mystical rules set forth by celibate old men."

 

[Tempest]

@[member="Delila Castillon"] @[member="Siobhan Kerrigan"]

Once you start down the dark path, forever will it dominate your destiny….

Words that none of those present knew, and which many seemed to forget. Still, for Tempest to be actively courting attack and using her anger was perhaps not the best omen for future stability.

As she faced up to the dummy, preparing to unleash her fury, words interrupted her from behind. Turning, she saw that Delila Castillon was there. She knew the other woman a little, but not much beyond a few words. Unfortunately for Delila being hit on was kind of redundant by this point…Tempest and Siobhan had gone to 4th base, into the dugout and out of the ground by this point….

“Blasters are my preferred choice too, but Sio says I should accidentally electrocute people,” she said with a shrug. “I guess she knows what she’s talking about when it comes to random devastation!” she joked.

“You come to watch the fun?”