The Dance with No Pants

[Joza Perl]

Heartbeat House Dance Studio​

It had been a long time since Joza had visited the dance studio. It was Heartbeat’s very first structure back before her company had blossomed into an entertainment empire. Nowadays she was too busy with corporate dealings and her family to get back to what she loved.

Except for today where she’d finally made time for it.

She’d traded her usual business attire for a pair of yoga pants and a comfortable form fitted athletic top this time around and arrived at the dance studio to teach today’s private instruction lessons and give the regular instructors a break.

It was nice to be back in the little building that had started it all, back when she was a different person. Back before the baby and the Outer Rim, but she was proud of what it had all become.

While waiting for her next appointment, the Zeltron sat on the floor and stretched.

[member="Vaudin Miir"]

 

[Vaudin Miir]

The caff was good today, he had to admit, it would have been better with a couple shots of rum but he was trying to stay off the sauce, so to speak. He had made an appointment for today. A little harmless fun to take his mind off the new sharpness of his the sober life. Nothing out of the ordinary really just a private date with a pretty lady. He only hoped Heartbeat had nice girls the last time he did this he ended up losing most of his clothes and a damn good blaster.

He hit the sanisteam for a quick wash and put on his best black pants, the gold rebublic stripe down the legs an honor he had earned for valor on Manaan. He tossed on a decent button down shirt and his favourite jacket before strapping on his twin MT-14 blasters. He didn't expect to need them but then it was better to have it and not need it, than to need it and not have it.

He headed from his ship to the Heartbeat "studio" and hoped it was worth the credits, the strange pangs in his conscience were something he wasn't the least bit used to but he decided to endeavor to persevere. Gotta keep people in business after all.

He found the building easily enough and stopped to check himself in the glassteel of the front viewport before he went in to see an actual receptionist.

"Vaudin Miir," he said in his best smooth talker voice as he leaned on the counter, "Here for my private session."


[member="Joza Perl"]

 

[Joza Perl]

The receptionist didn’t look taken aback. If she was, she didn’t look it, not with what she had seen. Heartbeat had grown in popularity and thus attracted all kinds who wanted to learn how to groove. Why would she judge the Iktotchi?

“Yes, Mr. Miir.” She responded sweetly, tapping a few times on her datapad. “Through that door there.” She waved to the studio floor entrance. “You’ll be with Miss Perl today. Lucky you! She’s one of the best in the business.” The receptionist winked.

If Vaudin walked through the door, he’d be greeted to the sight of the Zeltron instructor bending over to stretch—touching her toes—with her back facing him.

[member="Vaudin Miir"]

 

[Vaudin Miir]

Vaudin gave the woman a smile and a wink as he pushed away from the counter and headed for the door. His grey eyes taking in the surroundings. This was the most well lit brothel he had ever seen. The decore was far more reserved than he would have guessed, as well.

He pushed the door open and stepped in closing the door behind him. His eyes scanned up from the floor and found the lone figure. Lithe dancers legs strecthed up to a well shaped backside all perfectly wrapped in body hugging yoga pants. It was an odd choice of costume but he had to say, it had the desired effect. He walked closer and began to unbutton his shirt as he moved.

"Ms. Perl, I assume?" He said in a voice as smooth as the curves he was just admiring, "They told me you are the best, but they didn't tell me you were gorgeous."

He noticed the pink of her skin as he drew close and already knew he would be hard pressed not to catch feelings and give away a large fortune to this one. But then maybe that's what made her so good. Somehow, he didn't think he'd mind.

"Now I know why they call this place Heartbeat." He said as he began to pull his shirt off and look around the room.

Polished floors, mirrors and freestanding Barres, he would have at least expected a mat or pillowed pallet or something. He suddenly was not so sure what he had signed up for.


[member="Joza Perl"]

 

[Joza Perl]

Heartbeat House had grown in notoriety over the past few years so it came as no surprise when they started attracting different types of dancers—the male Iktotchi was new, though.

Joza rose back into a full standing position and turned her head as the two ‘o clock appointment stepped through the threshold and began…unbuttoning his shirt? Upon closer inspection he didn’t appear to be properly dressed for dancing.

Hands on her hips, she gave him a once over as he started to remove his shirt.

“Usually they don’t start removing clothes until the second round—that’s where things really get going.”

She liked to break dance lessons up into different sections in order to give students a chance to breathe. The Zeltron smiled in a way that could only be described as politely amused.

“That’s me. Can I have your name? I’m afraid that I didn’t have much time to check the roster beforehand. It’s been a busy day!”

She stretched both arms over her head, grabbing one elbow as she tilted to the side.

“Do you have any prior experience? I like to gauge where you’re at before we start so that I don’t go too rough on you.”

She winked.

[member="Vaudin Miir"]

 

[Vaudin Miir]

He looked around again for a second and tried to imagine just what kind of activities she had planned that would involve multiple rounds. He had to say, he liked all the things he had come up with. He stopped pulling off his shirt for a moment and gave a smile and a blatant glance at her various positive attributes before as he listened to her.

“I bet your in high demand from the looks.” He said and he meant it. She was beautiful, with bright intelligent eyes a lean graceful physique, and perfect pink skin. He had always had a soft spot for Zeltrons, and he couldn’t help but go with it. “I’m Vaudin, Vaudin Miir if that makes a difference.”

He watched as she began stretching again and knew he was in for a wild time if she felt the need to stretch first. He didn’t know what to expect and he would hate to be sub par so he decided he should stretch too.

He rolled his shoulders and began stretching his arms as he thought about why she would need to know his experience with this sort of thing. He gave a shrug and decided since she asked he would just tell her the truth. What did he have to hide anyway. He had always been something of an open book with his personal life.

“Well, I started young mostly just randomly with girls in the ports we stopped at, and then you kind of just live life and things you don’t expect happen.” He began as he continued to limber up, “I messed around on Zeltros a few times, single partners and a couple times with a few at once. Their was the Twi’lek ballet once on Manaan, they were just passing through though but yeah, all of them. Um…That Togrutan Jedi and I went a few rounds, she was pretty new to how things went but man she had great instincts. There was a lot of just random encounters all over the space lanes. I was pretty well known around the core and mid rim for a while for my work dancing around the Republic senate…Glad that’s over to be honest. I had a few encounters in Mandalorian space way back now but that’s kind of a crap shoot, stubborn folk out that way. More Zeltros visits, a nice little Zabrak on Jelucan not that long ago actually but that was just a quick tumbling thing and I’m pretty sure she paid me for that one. Can’t remember why, I was a bit tipsy at the time.”

He leaned back with his hands on his hips to stretch the small of his back and then straightened to look at her with those slate grey eyes and gave a shrug.

“I’ve gotten around.” He said, “I’ll admit that but I’ve never had occasion to settle in one spot for long, I’m pretty up front with that.”


[member="Joza Perl"]

 

[Joza Perl]

Joza grinned a little. “The looks probably are part of it, yes.” She admitted. Hell, she was a Zeltron. “But I like to think it’s my skill that people come to me for.”

She rolled her shoulders, then her neck. “In any case, it’s good to meet you, Vaudin. How did you hear about Heartbeat?”

As he relayed what she assumed to be his dance experience to her, Joza looked a mix of taken aback and impressed.

“Wow,” She shook her head. “You might have more experience than me!” She laughed. “Care to show me your favorite moves, Vaudin Miir? I might learn a thing or two.”

Indeed.

[member="Vaudin Miir"]

 

[Vaudin Miir]

He gave a sideways grin and thought that he eas willing to bet her skills were right up there with her looks. He began a standing quad stretch as he tried to remember where he actually did hear about Heartbeat House. It was a funny thing, even in his recent poor attempt at sobriety he felt more foggy than he had when he was drunk. The fog cleared a little as he thought about the holonet signup for the private session.

"The holonet." He said as he switched to stretch the other leg. "I found your company under entertainment services on the holonet."

He couldn't say that he blamed her for looking surprised at his experiences. He had to say looking back that he would have been just as happy if he hadn't gotten around quite so often, but not a whole lot he could do about it now and hey, at least it was all in good fun.

He gave a smile and if he could have turned red he would have. When the best escort in the business tells you that you may have more experience than she does? Yeah, can't help but think you know a thing or two. But when she asked to see his favourite move, he just stared for a moment.

He looked around the studio and then at her clothes and the complete lack of padding on any surface. He blinked and gave a shrug as he moved closer. He took a deep breath to focus and took another step up to her. He reached a hand around and placed it on the small of her back then pulled her close as he leaned down and placed his lips not to firmly against hers. He reached a hand to the side of her face and caressed it gently as he kissed her with as much passion as he could for such short notice and absolutely no lead in at all. He had other less clothed moves but in his opinion a good kiss was just as good as half the other stuff.

He broke away and looked down at her with those grey eyes and gave another shrug.

"It's better when it builds up to it." He said as he tried to gauge her reaction, "Still, considered one of the best around."


[member="Joza Perl"]

 

[Joza Perl]

Joza’s brows rose in sync as Vaudin approached her. She had to admit that she was curious to see what he’d choose given that he didn’t look like the dancer type. But she’d been surprised before, and surprised she would continue to be.

Her back arched involuntarily as his hand slid onto the small of her back, not expecting the touch. Maybe whatever this move was needed a partner, which case she would gladly oblige.

Then he kissed her, full on the mouth in the most passionate way. His other hand caressed the side of her face and Joza’s eyes—which had remained open—widened in sincere shock. Still, she decided to enjoy it for the time being because Zeltron, and also because she now understood why his answers were so strange.

As he pulled away, she blinked and then reeled back her left fist before smashing it into his face. Lucky it wasn’t her right arm, or the ‘robot’ arm as she had affectionately dubbed it.

“Okay, so,” She wiped her mouth with the back of her hand, grin tingling her lips as she couldn’t help but find the whole thing sort of hilarious. “If you want to do the dance with no pants, I can give you directions to a great brothel that I also own.” She paused.

“This is a dance studio.”

[member="Vaudin Miir"]

 

[Vaudin Miir]

His head snapped back as the woman's fist collided with his face. He could feel the blood start running in his nose as he stepped back and put a hand to his face. A lot of good his precognitive abilities had done today. He looked at her wide eyed and then looked around again.

"Oh." He said as he held his nose and decided he had a head like a siv, "I...I think I deserved that."

He slowly flopped down on his backside and shook his head as the whole situation from the holonet sign up to walking in and seeing the woman came flooding back to him. He laid back on the hard floor and thought of their brief exchange that lead up to her socking him in the face.

He couldn't help it. He started to laugh.

"Blasted Force, but I'm an ass." He said before laughing again and pulling his shirt up to hold to his bloody nose.

He slowly stood and did his best to not get blood on her nice dance floor. He was usually too drunk to be embarrassed but not today. Today the embarrassment was good and clear.

"I apologize, Ms. Perl." He said as he shook his head, "I'm a karkin idiot."

[member="Joza Perl"]

 

[Joza Perl]

Joza wasn’t angry. Every instinct in her body told her to be mad but she couldn’t bring herself to scrunch her face up in anger and tell him off.

He’d apologized appropriate anyhow.

But it was just….the whole situation was funny now that she understood why he’d been acting strange. At least he didn’t grope her behind.

“You are.” She agreed, amusement tingling her tone. Her face was relaxed, even almost amicable. Her eyes passed over Vaudin as if to assess his injuries. “Wait here.”

She made her way to the edge of the studio and through a door. After rummaging around in the tiny closet for a moment, she reappeared with some gauze bandages and an unmarked bottle. The gauze would be better for actually wrapping a wound, but it was the best she could do for now. The bottle was a different story.

“Here. It’s a disinfectant.” Uncapping the bottle, she splashed some of the clear liquid onto the gauze and handed it to him.

Vodka was a disinfectant, right?

[member="Vaudin Miir"]

 

[Vaudin Miir]

He stood still had she assessed the damage to his pretty face. He looked around the place and shook his head again. How had he made such a stupid assumption? He moved his hand from his nose and looked at the blood on his shirt then covered the nose again. He had had worse, done worse and looked worse but it had been a while.

He watched the woman as she walked back in carrying some first aid gear. He hadn't really expected that. She was still just as pretty maybe more so after seeing her left jab. He took the bottle and gauze while an embarrassed smile.

"Thanks, Miss." He said as he opened tje bottle and put the gauze over the mouth before tipping it upside down to soak the cloth. The stuff smelled like vodka but it sure was close to the disinfecting kind.

He pressed the gauze to his mouth and nose and immediately regretted the decision. He sniffed the bottle and decided it was worth a shot. So he took a swig and put the gauze back to his face. He handed her the bottle and let the burning of his face and the burning of his throat just wash over him.

"That's one helluva left jab you've got Ms. Perl." He said from behind the gauze, "Helluva good left."

[member="Joza Perl"]

 

[Joza Perl]

Usually she had actual medical disinfectant laying around but the alcohol would work just as well, such was her assumption. “It works well enough on the field.” She informed with a quick nod. More than once she’d had to crack a bottle open to disinfect some wound on the fly. Something something septic shock.

“It is, isn’t it?” She smiled in recognition of her own ability to punch someone in the face. “The right one would have hurt more.” She flexed said hand where minute mechanical sounds could be heard. The cybernetics packed an extra punch.

Joza took the bottle and held it in her grasp for a few moments before mirroring his idea and taking a swig for herself. It burned like hell and she nearly coughed at the sensation. The Zeltron preferred mixed drinks, thank you.

“So, still want to learn how to dance?” She balanced the bottle at her hip and cocked a brow.

[member="Vaudin Miir"]

 

[Vaudin Miir]

He looked at the woman and shook his head at his own stupidity, one more time. She was trouble of the best sort he could have told you that with one eye and half a glance. The way she held the bottle on her hip reminded him that those hips were there and he fought a hard battle not to be obvious about appreciating them.

"Well, I'm here." He said happy to see the blood had already stopped, "And I'd hate to waste your time."

Did he mean it or was it that he wanted the chance to spend some more time with pretty pink trouble? He wasn't tellin'.

"If you'll still teach me Miss Perl." He said in his best I got caught but I'm not in jail yet voice, "I could stand to learn whatever I signed up for."

He removed his shirt the rest of the way so he was just in the tank top undershirt he had worn. He didn't feel like dancing in a bloody shirt, he hoped she didn't think he was dumb enough to be undressing for another reason again.

"I'm ready too learn, Miss Left Jab." He said with a lopsided smirk. Hopefully he didn't give her a reason to pop him again.
[member="Joza Perl"]

 

[Joza Perl]

Joza Perl was not an…inexperienced woman. She was a Zeltron and therefore knew what it felt like to have eyes on her. Hell, she enjoyed it to an extent—who didn’t like to feel desired and attractive? There was always a line, though.

So far Miir had crossed it, then retreated back. He seemed genuinely sorry for the misunderstanding though and it was hard enough to fool an empath, so she let him stay.

“Why not.” She shrugged. “You can show off your new dance moves the next time you’re at a cantina and maybe make a few credits.” That was how she’d started herself. Dancing and waitressing on Zeltros, mostly, then off into the galaxy where things got real interesting real fast.

“Alright, legs shoulder width apart.” Joza took her stance. “We’re going to do a very basic movement; hip slides. Slide your hips to the left, leaning your weight into your left side a bit.” She repeated the motion, hips sliding back and forth steadily. “Make sure to keep the rest of your body centered.”

And so the learning began.

[member="Vaudin Miir"]

 

[Vaudin Miir]

Wouldn't that be hilarious?

"I usually lose money in a Cantina." He said as he looked at her and tried to mirror her stance, "Wouldn't that be a change."

He stood with his feet shoulder width apart and realized she never told him what to do with his hands. He decided to put them in his pockets to keep them from doing anything stupid, well stupider than what the rest of him had already done anyway. Somehow, he didn't think that would help but he did as instructed and began to sway his narrow hips left.

The hands in the pockets didn't help the movement at all so he took them out and tried to keep then from getting in his way as he continued to mirror her. His first thought was she looked a whole lot better than he did when she did it, so he doubled his effort and tried to make his movements more fluid. If a video of this ever got out he was sure he'd never hear the end of it.

"Like this?" He asked still trying to get it right.


[member="Joza Perl"]

 

[Joza Perl]

“Hm,” Joza pursed her lips as she inspected Vaudin’s hips with a clinical eye. “Not exactly.”

The next hour or so was spent teaching the Iktotchi how to move dem hips. It went about as well as you could guess.

The rest of the session however was more of an alcohol induced blur.

When they would wake up, they were on the other side of Zeltros.

In a hotel.

The Honeymoon Suite.

In a hot tub.

(Clothes optional)

Joza groaned as she came to and her hands immediately went to hold her head. Everything was groggy, her head hurt like it was being split open and her mouth was dry. “Unnngh…” The Zeltron groaned again, this time more vocally as she slowly took in her surroundings. The hotel room was trashed, nothing new there. Empty bottles were scattered around the hot tub, nothing new there. Wait, hot tub? She looked down and realized that she was wearing Miir’s entire set of clothes, down to the last button. Wh…Miir?

She looked over to see if she could find the red skinned Iktotchi, but before she could potentially bring him into focus her eyes landed on the datapad next to her. It had a severely fractured screen but the image of the certificate they’d somehow both signed was clear.

“Ohhhh nnnnnooooo……”

[member="Vaudin Miir"]

 

[Vaudin Miir]

Vaudin woke slowly, his head felt like it had spent hours in a vice and someone was still slowly cranking the handle back and forth. His mouth was dry and his eyes felt like he had tried to rinse his eyes with sand. It wasn't pretty but it wasn't an alien feeling either.

The smell of chlorinated water hit his nose just a moment before the hint of spilled booze reached him. He looled to the left and thought he saw movement and lifted a hand to push it away. His hand caught on some fabric, light and laced, as he pulled it away and realized it was a pink bra that had been hung on his horns.

He looked at it for a second as he held it up by the strap with one finger. He looked down and finally realized he was in a hot tub, nude, and he wasn't alone. There across from him, in every stitch of his clothes, sat a very concerned looking pink woman and Vaudin felt an odd mix of regret and confusion. He regretted he couldn't remember whatever led to his clothes being on her and confusion about how the pretty dance teacher and he got into a hot tub together.

He stood, hot water ran off him as he looked around the mess of a hotel room amd heard 'oh no'. His heart rose to his throat and sat there as he stood shamelessly uncovered and turned to look at her.

"Oh, no, What?" He said genuinely worried about what she was looking at he hoped for the obvious and went with it, "I'm sure the screen can be fixed, it can't be that bad."

He hoped it wasn't pictures of them in compromising situations. That would be bad. He never even considered the truth of the situation. It wasn't his first drunken romp on Zeltros.

[member="Joza Perl"]

 

[Joza Perl]

Joza looked up at Vaudin in all of his nude glory, crisis temporarily forgotten. Her eyes locked on the pink undergarment that had wound up attached to his horns.

“That isn’t my bra.”

Nope. She’d worn a black colored brassiere that was yet to be found. More importantly.

“No, not the screen Miir.” She ground out, irritated by the headache and the fact that he didn’t know why she was irritated. “It’s this.”

She turned the device around so he could read what it said. Even with the cracks splintering the screen he’d be able to make out the bold lettering that read CERTIFICATE OF MARRIAGE followed by their individual sloppy signatures.

The rest was all gibberish, presumably.

[member="Vaudin Miir"]

 

[Vaudin Miir]

[member="Joza Perl"]

He looked at the screen and the big bold words that said certificate of marriage on the top. Now, Vaudin Miir wasn't one to panic, but this was a whole different level of concern. He had faced pirates, Rakghoul plague, Yuuzan Vong, Sea monsters, and politics, but one thing he never planned to face was Marriage. He looked the form up and down until he decided that it was most definitly his scrawl at the bottom beside what he assumed was hers.

"That your hand writing?" he asked even though he didn't see anyone else hanging around.

He had to admit, he hadn't exactly gotten the worse end of the deal if it wasn't some joke. She was a helluva lot prettier than he was that was for sure. He rubbed a hand over his head for a second and sat down still not really sure what to do. She didn't look bad in his clothes really. It could be worse.

"Could be worse." He said feeling about as confused as he had when he walked into her dance studio and made an ass of himself, "Well, for me anyway."