Private The Nature of the Mind

[Kaleleon]

Holding the timesheet in my hands, I looked over what I was being requested of. Specifically I was going to be doing duties of training others. One of the tasks many senior Jedi had was a roulette of padawans that wanted training in specific things that their own mentor could not do, or sent to someone who had expertise in something that the padawan wished to learn. That way they could experience everything they could. The one I had today was a familiar name.

Mahsa

The young woman who I had fought with on Coruscant a while back. It had been some time it seemed since then. The meeting place she had asked for was outside the temple. Specifically the grove for us to train in. Which I found interesting. Last I had recalled, she was a young woman who was very much in tune with mental abilities and emotions. The fight against the Sith who had used Dark battle meditation for the Sith nearly crippled her mind and spirit. Only really able to fight it when she had been connected to the aura of valor I had projected to others in an attempt to fight it. Maybe that is why she requested me? To learn such of a skill? Either way, I knew that this would likely be an interesting day.

I walked out of the temple and was about to start moving onward to the meeting spot when I spotted the young woman. Her white hair and little ears poking out of it. Walking over, I decided to voice the hello after some time.

"Well you look better than you did on Coruscant."

 

[Mahsa]

Her master had always encouraged her to learn from others as much as she did from the Echani, something about the experience of seeing how others approached their teachings being helpful to keep Mahsa from falling into a box of her own making. She hadn’t understood it at first and, frankly, the thought of learning from others more stranger to her than Master Jigora downright frightened the Kazelrrian… but time had proved her master right, and little by little Mahsa had continued to grow.

Knight Seleare’s name had stood out among those available for the day, though she’d been unable to figure out why as she’d filled up the form in her datapad. When the time had come to choose a meeting location most of the usual options had apparently been booked out for the afternoon, but she’d been glad to see that certain parts of the grove still showed as available.

Diligent to a fault the young Kazelrrian had arrived long before the scheduled hour, unwilling to waste the time that Knight Seleare was so generously offering to padawans like herself. "M-Mast—ah, it’s you…!" Finally it made sense why his name had felt familiar, able to recognize his features despite the time that had passed since the attempted invasion of Coruscant.

"Well you look better than you did on Coruscant."
"T-Thank you… I’m glad to see you well too, m-master."

A small bow of her head was given as Kaleleon reached her, a habit she’d picked up sometime back in Atrisia and had never seemingly grown out of, before those golden eyes brimmed with curiosity as she stared up at the man. "What are we s-starting with today?"

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Kaleleon​

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[Kaleleon]

The frame of the smaller, and still rather shy young woman bowed as I neared her. I chuckled a little as her voice spoke of a nicety for seeing and meeting with her. What surprised me was her abruptness of wanting to get directly into the lesson for today. I rolled my eyes lightly Sure, formalities were nice, but to me, they were not a necessity. A nice gesture for sure. Despite this, I bowed my head to her in return. Respecting the culture that she was honoring me in.

"I appreciate the honorifics, but we can relax a little if you so want."

Indicating for us to be walking out towards the location that we would be having for the day, we would walk out towards that area. The intent was to talk on the way there so then we weren't standing in the way of others, and maybe do some light catching up before the lesson.

"How has your training in Empathy been going? I know that during combat it can be sometimes overwhelming. Even more so with your circumstances."

Mahsa

 

[Mahsa]

A faint giggle escaped her as she watched her mentor for the day roll his eyes, before giving a small nod when Knight Seleare suggested they kept things relaxed and casual today. "Okay…!" Mahsa couldn’t help but be reminded of Makko Vyres when he’d asked her the same, her steps falling in line besides the older Jedi as he decided a walk-n-talk was in order.

"I-It’s gotten a bit better…" She doubted the queasiness felt when exposed to the darker side of the Force would ever go away, but it was true that she’d been getting better at keeping herself grounded. "I, uuhm... I’ve only thrown up once since the Temple's invasion."

She would’ve preferred to keep that counter at zero of course, especially after she’d managed to escape the Dorvalla mines without leaving the contents of her stomach behind… but some progress was often better than no progress, right?

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Kaleleon​

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[Kaleleon]

Her words of getting better was reassuring. It showed that despite the massive downer that was the previous interaction, she was getting a better handle and control of such a pervasive skillset. Even mentioning she had only thrown up once more since that time. A small chuckle came from my lips as we continued to walk.

"That's good. Getting a better hold of your stomach as well it seems."

There was a portion of me that wanted to possibly reach into her head and yank out that debilitating weakness from her. I hated seeing someone suffer so greatly from something that could be very trivial. However, there was another part of me that understood this could be a powerful ally to her as well. Not just learning how to read and interpret, but influence. And that is where I came in. Why I was willing to teach her today and possibly later on as well.

"Reason for bringing that up, is I think I may know a way to help you harness the emotional spectrum you feel and release around you. Which is why the best place to do it would be out here."

Looking to her as we were walking, I made sure to make an effort to appeal to her as a person. Not just someone to train.

"Would you be willing to go through that?"

Mahsa

 

[Mahsa]

The chuckle had been short, but she had been grateful for it all the same. It had eased whatever tension still lingered around her shoulders, and she nodded in agreement to his words. "Mhmm, e-eating light before missions helps too."

There was a moment of silence as they walked, a pair of curious eyes occasionally glancing back at Knight Seleare as she wondered what he might be thinking about. Thankfully he didn’t keep her waiting for long.

"O-Oh… I see." Subtle shades of apricot shimmered across her hair as she pondered over his explanation, nodding quietly at the logic behind his approach. It was true that she often felt her best when surrounded by nature, so what better place than here to try and gain more control over the endless depth of her emotions?

"Yes!" The enthusiasm behind her outburst surprised even Mahsa, a vibrant wave of citrine flushing through her hair before quietly fading as she gathered control of herself. "If y-you think it’ll help, then I’d l-like to try it…"

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Kaleleon​

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[Kaleleon]

She was apprehensive at first. Rightfully so. Speaking over her current problems, and bringing it to the forefront without her real consent, was a possibly dangerous thing to do. Emotions, and its spectrum was a very fickle thing. it can be changed, and altered. Damaged and manipulated. But also healed, and tended. For such a long time, I had felt that my job as a Jedi was to use those damaged emotions, the fear and uncertainty into a weapon that could create courage and bravery. However, that lesson is one that even I, am still learning.

As soon as Mahsa showed a willingness and enthusiasm for wanting to do better, I felt for her. I felt good that she was willing to try. Willing to place her hope and faith in me to potentially show her a better path. I returned a smile, but I didn't feel like it was genuine. Like my eyes betrayed me in what I wanted to show her. I wanted to exude a confidence and strength like I had back on coruscant. However, I looked ahead as we were walking.

"That's the difficulty that I can tell you and share with you. What I know, my knowledge and application in its wisdom, doesn't mean that it will work for you."

That was the betrayal. The fact of the matter was that I would not be able to show her. I could not just give her an answer and the problem be solved. It was a problem that she would have to define, and discover on her own. Determining what could and couldn't be done. Then, and Only then, would she be able to begin down the path of learning to better herself and potentially others.

"Yet, This is what I want to show you. What I want this lesson to be, is not that you should follow the steps of my path. I want you to discover, and find the best way for you."

The pained smile looked over to her.

"I can give you the question. Guide you to where you want to go, but I cannot show you. I cannot just give it to you. Mahsa, you have to be willing to go down that path. No matter how hard it may become."

Mahsa

 

[Mahsa]

Temple’s Grove

Mahsa was painfully aware of her shortcomings, and extremely grateful to the Force as it kept the right company at Mahsa’s side throughout her most difficult hurdles… but she knew that couldn’t go on forever, and she didn’t want someone else to pay the price for her own weakness.

She was the reason behind the gruesome silvery scar on Ayhan ‘s chest, and the thought of further harm befalling him or her friends due to her own limitations frighten her more than anything else.

Darker hues of pewter and slate had started to pool at the very tips of her hair before the voice of Knight Seleare snapped her back to the present, the wisps vanishing from her snowy strands as those thoughts were shoved back into the back of her mind. The smile he gifted her felt emptier than before, unmatched by whatever seemed to linger behind the man’s eyes—something that remained a mystery as his head turned towards the front as he continued his steps.

"I k-know… my own master has said the same before." All they could do was share the knowledge gained through their own experiences in the hopes it would help guide the younger ones down their own path, but what worked for some didn’t always work for others. "It’s s-still better than nothing… and I’m sure I can learn s-something from it too, just like I do with b-books."

She offered a faint smile back to the taller Jedi as she kept pace with Kale, but there was a depth to those golden eyes that spoke louder than any words could. Whatever she had personally experienced so far had been far from simple or easy, but it had yet to snuff out the quiet spark that sought to keep growing.

"I’ll give it my very best, master."

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Kaleleon​

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