Private When the Past Comes Back to Haunt You

[Noelle Varanin]

Before accepting the crown Noelle had tried to envision what that would mean.

She thought of the people dressed in silks and the gilded candle sticks. She thought of the decisions she'd have to make and the words of reassurance she'd have to give. She thought of the restoration of Eshan, and the healing they still had to do. She had braced for a great number of things, but she what she was not prepared for was how out of touch she was with the pain of her people.

The city might be laying down its final stones for restoration, but the loss they had endured still echoed through the psyche of the hall. When she pictured what sitting on the throne would be like, she never thought a crowded room could feel so... hollow.

Isolation had not been her best idea. She frowned to herself as the last petitioner bowed and started down the aisle for the doors.

"Is that it?" She asked, tilting her chin to the female besides her. Lina was her name. She organized Noelle's affairs. This day in particular was the first open hearing Noelle had hosted for the public. It had been a long session filled with citizens that had waited hours for a chance to see their new Queen. It was hard to hear their words of need. She couldn't bring herself to say no to single father asking for assistance with work. Nevermind the director of an orphanage, with more mouths to feed than she had spoons or shoes.

It was hard to balance restoration against the production of basic goods. They needed a city to live in, but they also needed shoes and tools and food to build it. Importing could only cover so much of the planet's needs, and her coffers only stretched so far.

Pressure built behind her eyes.

"Yes, My Grace. That was the last one."

Noelle took in a deep breath and pushed off the arms of her throne.

"Good."

Kal

 

[Kal]

On and on it went, petitioner after petitioner, story after story, request after request. Some were denied, but many were granted - enough to make the new Queen seem generous, which might well heighten expectations.

It was in the nature of most sentients to want for more, after all.

"Your schedule is quite busy, Your Grace." Having seemed utterly insignificant while he leaned against an ornate pillar, the musical voice of a lean young man with blueish-green hair and keen eyes brought him into focus.

"However will you fit in the abduction of innocent spirits?"

A soft smirk spread across his lips as blue eyes briefly hosted a spark of white.

 

[Noelle Varanin]

Noelle included her head at the address, turning to leave. It was late and dinner would surely be done. She was inclined to step out and dismiss the man's matters until the next meeting, but then he finished his sentence.

Her blood went cold.

Her throat bobbed as she processed the full meaning of his words. Panic spiked wildly through her. Blackmail was the first of her concerns. How could anyone possibly have known about that. She had only told her mother. As flawed as Ashin was, she wouldn't destabilize her daughter's rule with only weeks in.

There was just no reason.

Noelle pulled her shoulders back and turned to summarized the stranger.

An odd feeling of familiarity tugged at her chest. "I find time for all of my subjects,' she countered, twisting his meaning. Her head tilted, her attention sharpening onto him. Yes... she knew him...

How.

She stepped towards him, not unlike a cat stalking its prey.

"And you are?"

 

[Kal]

Smirking all along, Kal bowed elegantly at her approach, though the otherwise courtly gesture seemed just a bit lackadaisical, bordering on mocking.

"A laudable stance, your grace." Like his bow, the blue-haired man's words checked all the right boxes without actually seeming deferential, almost as if it was less politeness more elaborate make-believe. Given the follow-up, she was unlikely to care.

<Am I really that forgettable, Noelle? You wound me.>

It would be clear as day that the implied offence was absent in its entirety, both by the faint hint of emotion and context that tended to accompany his telepathic voice and by the sparkle of amusement in his aquamarine eyes.

She had, after all, never seen him in a body.

Noelle Varanin​

 

[Noelle Varanin]

Kal had had the unfortunate privilege of seeing Noelle in many different states, but never had she been left so blatantly shocked. The room rippled with tangible tension as the crowd responded to the break in her impassive expression. Heads turned his way, several nondescript guards slowly moved their hands towards hidden blades.

The breath left the public's lungs as they waited for her response.

He stood in a room full of kinetically inclined, and things did not add up.

Noelle seemed to catch onto this. She closed her parted lips and straightened her spine. She took in a deep breath, then forced a smile that would achieve nothing but a break in tension. No one was fooled.

"Lina, please see our guest to my private receiving chambers. I would like to change before departing for dinner." She started down the throne's steps, no longer paying Kal any heed spare a glance over. This seemed to be enough to remind her of his new... condition. She paused, then amended. "And set two plates tonight. That is, if our off worlder requires food?"

An odd comment to many, but a pointed one to him.

He would get no open discussion until they were behind closed doors. For obvious reasons.

 

[Kal]

Her surprise was obvious to him and the crowd both, a fact that would no doubt result in some amount of gossip. It was not often that aristocrats were caught off guard like that, after all, at least not the ones trained for and experienced in the subtle manoeuvring of courtly affairs.

Kal, of course, was very pleased with himself; her shock was amusing and the success of his earlier anonymity a good sign.

"That would be lovely, your grace." A quicker, shallower bow this time, one accompanied by the brief flash of a wry smile. The eyes of Noelle's guards and her assistant (or the courtly equivalent, whatever that was) were following him inquisitively, of course, but actual questions were avoided. Their Queen had provided sufficient instructions, after all, and most individuals in service to a crown knew better than to be caught prying.

--- Later ---

"Two plates as the exception? You usually eat alone, then? I can understand that; food is quite enjoyable when done right." A bit too normal a topic by his standards, perhaps, but he was not solely occupied by the stranger things in life. Food was a pleasure enjoyed by many of his kind, though he was not one to engage in the more fringe practices favoured by some. Sampling poisons, for one - a horribly wasteful hobby.

<I trust you missed me and my steady stream of insight and helpful advice?>

As an afterthought, he considered her new attire - was the full courtly regalia less comfortable, perhaps, or were there other reasons for the change? If the former, she really ought to wear whatever she saw fit. What is the point of a crown if one cannot even dress as one pleases?​

Noelle Varanin​

 

[Noelle Varanin]

Alone.

No one stood within fifty feet of the room, and still he injected himself into her mind. Noelle shot him a withering look, the candle light reflecting off the simple silk attire he was more familiar with her wearing.

"You have a mouth now. Use it."

She never liked the invasive connection they shared between their minds. It had been one thing when he was incorporeal and bond to her, but she had released him.

Why was it still there?


"I have always eaten alone. I don't see why that should change just because I am queen. I do not see any family here, do you?" She did not mean to let the bitterness seep into her words, but he was one of the few that would understand where it came from. After a long, tiring day it came out.

She realized this, her fork pausing on her lips and she frowned.

"And who is this?" She finally asked, changing the conversation with a pointed gesture at his body. "Another bonding gone wrong? I'm beginning to believe the problem is you. Do you need help out of the poor sap?"


Kal

 

[Kal]

"Not a fan of the effortless ease of mind-to-mind communication, hmm?" Hard to say whether it was due to their rather unusual history or mortal bias, both seemed equally plausible. Many organics seemed to believe that speaking telepathically was the same as reading their mind, which was clearly utter nonsense - such speech was, after all, hardly a prerequisite for mind-reading.

No matter, he had expected that a vocally capable body would be useful here, thus the choice of an Ersansyr, his go-to for more diplomatic matters.

"Your sister has run off to pursue her own path again, then?" Likewise with her mothers, but that went without saying.

A flicker of amusement in his eyes at her pointed question, Kal shook his head. "Hardly, this is a body of my own choosing - and I seem to remember that it was you, not I, that made a mess of that binding. Not that I was inclined to help you keep me suppressed, of course." Truth be told her failure was entirely expected, given the complexities involved in binding a spirit such as he. One able to utilise the Force in varied, multifaceted ways.

"This is a clone, sort of. Grown in a vat but produced from a tailored template, in this case for more social purposes. I'm told it is considered visually appealing by a not insignificant portion of humanoids." Perhaps he should have taken it to that beauty contest, but attending bodiless had been fun.​

Noelle Varanin​

 

[Noelle Varanin]

Noelle's brow raised, her chewing slowing as she gave the body an intention one-over.

"Hm," was all she said, spearing another object on her plate and slipping it between her lips. She chewed, swallowed, and deigned to take another sip before addressing him again.

"What need do you have for a body?" She was almost blunt enough to follow up with "With need do you have with me?" but truth was, she didn't want to invite the answer. The debt she owed him was large, and the vagueness of it hung over her like a cloud. She had nothing to lose back then when she had made the promise.

Now she did.

Suffice to say, she'd have him killed if she thought that would actually keep his spirit from muddling in her affairs.

Kal

 

[Kal]

Filling the silence by methodically attacking his meal, an act that had less to do with hunger than it did with curiosity, Kal nonetheless displayed a no doubt surprising level of proficiency with royal cutlery. Assimilated knowledge, mostly - his actual experience with such meals was limited. In this case, it was tasty enough, though he tended to favour the cornucopia of new tastes and experiences that was a high-end buffet.

Oh, or a ten-course meal. Those were quite enjoyable, excessive politeness notwithstanding.

"To experience life, for one. Taste the food, see the sights with flesh-and-blood eyes, that sort of thing." Smiling softly, he made a point of tapping out a steady rhythm on the dining temple. "Not to mention interact with the physical world, so much easier when wearing one of these."

As an added benefit, the fleshy insulation did make sorcerous shenanigans more difficult by far.

"So then, how heavy weighs the crown?"​

Noelle Varanin​

 

[Noelle Varanin]

Noelle watched him, her bites slow and intentional as she weighed the merit of his words. It was hard to tell if he was lying to her, even with the thin layer of understanding they still possessed for each other. He had never mislead her before. Whether that was through oath or self preservation, she knew better than to assume.

Despite his fleshy appearance, he was not human. He wasn't even of this realm.

It would be preferable in this moment to have her mother's guidance on things like this. It seemed she'd have to make due with due diligence, and her gut.

She sighed and placed down her fork, answering rather honestly.

"I do not regret it, if that is what you are asking. My people were in sore need of proper leadership. They don't do good with councils, they need a clear direction and singularity in its authority. It is in our social structure," she added, not expecting him to have enough knowledge to compare two species independently.

She made no mention of herself, her lips pursing in a matter of fact gesture as she plucked up her wine and sipped. The meal was simple, but expertly prepared. She wasn't indulging in the role. She was hesitant to.

She did not make eye contact, her fingers delicately placing back her glass just so .

"They are better for this."

Kal

 

[Kal]

"Hmm." Neither refuting nor accepting outright her claims, he simply eyed her thoughtfully before taking another bite and nodding slowly.

"I suppose I can see that. I have seen vast differences in how various species and cultures approach authority, in my travels." His kind had a fairly flat hierarchy, but he could see why that might be more difficult with the Echani - there were far more of them, for one, and they often seemed to favour more personal methods of communication, like a sparring session. No great telepathic web could be erected to achieve mutual understanding.

"You consider it more duty than right, then?" It was an important distinction, for those with power - and one with far-reaching consequences when it came to how they approached their position. Then there was the balance between self-confidence and listening to sensible advice.

Sampling the wine once more, he found it tasteful enough - and its detrimental effects on his body's performance negligible, at least in the doses one would feasibly consume during an average dinner. Correction, the doses he would feasibly consume during an average dinner.

"Tell me, how well do you know the power dynamics of your court - who has dirt on who, who knows whose secrets, who is spying on you?"​

Noelle Varanin​

 

[Noelle Varanin]

She didn't comment. She didn't need any level of empathy to sense the direction of his probing questions. He was feeling her out. And what would he do if he did not like what he found?

Have her dethroned?

The sarcasm caught on a spark of fear. She pursed her lips, her appetite lost as she swallowed back a lump of meat. Yes, well. She supposed if anyone had the ability to hurt her, it would be the spirit she had entrapped for months against its will.

"I'm afraid I don't know what you're talking about," she murmured, the direction of his inquiries over looked. "There are no issues here, no one is unhappy, and no one is spying on me," she dismissed flippantly.

"Well." She paused, catching the suggestive light in his eyes. "Besides you. What are you doing here? You cannot honestly need that favor so soon, when I said it could not bring me harm, that extends to my rule." At least, the root of her stress came out. He would have never seen her reach for so many words so fast at once.

She also had never felt like she had something to be accountable for.

Kal

 

[Kal]

She seemed nervous, on edge. Quite different from the relative confidence she had enjoyed when he had been trapped in her bauble. Had he been a more petty being he might have taken no small amount of satisfaction from the reaction, but he truly did consider the matter settled.

He had neither the interest nor the predilection to spend his days wallowing in grudges and bemoaning past infractions.

He did not, however, immediately dismiss her concerns, for something else had caught his attention - as was evidenced by his amused smile.

"You are a monarch, Noelle. The top of a rather tall pyramid. Someone will always be spying on you, the trick is knowing who so you can control the flow of information." Or have them arrested, he supposed, but thinking that would dissuade further attempts was naive at best, foolish at worst. The lesser nobles would be scheming to better their position, as would criminal elements, and foreign governments were likely watching.

There was a good chance the Silver Jedi were keeping an eye on her too, given the number of Sith in her family.

"As for me, you have no need to be concerned. If I wanted to hurt you I simply wouldn't have offered you the opportunity to settle matters." To her months of imprisonment would have been quite horrid, no doubt, but he had found the experience interesting enough. "Being imprisoned is a bit annoying, mind you, and there would be consequences if you tried it again, but I hold no grudges."

Sipping lightly from his wine, he paused to eye the substance appraisingly before continuing. "As for me, do I need a reason to visit an old friend?" The soft smirk on his lips made it somewhat difficult to tell how serious he was, but he did not seem hostile, at least.​

Noelle Varanin​

 

[Noelle Varanin]

Wouldn't that be so convenient?

Friend.

What an unheard of way to grow close enough to undermine her ru-- Her nostrils flared, the girl hearing her paranoia clearly for the first time. She looked away from him, her lips pressed into a tell-tale pout as she tried to calm her stuttering heart back down.

She was eighteen.

Eighteen, alone, and wholly unprepared for just how complex the galaxy could be. She was over her head, and she knew it. She didn't need an enemy to undo her, her own fears would do it to herself. Her fingers tightened over her napkin, hiding a quiver.

"How would you do it then? How would you control this flow of information that you are so sure is happening behind my back." A brow raised his way. It would seem she was finally listening.

Kal

 

[Kal]

There was a long pause - and then she asked for his advice. Smiling cheerfully, he tapped his plate once, twice, thrice, then spoke up.

"First of all you will need to know the who, the dramatis personae if you will. Ambassadors, Jedi, others with strong external ties - those go without saying. Individuals with significant debts are similarly risky." Smile turning cold, almost predatory, he continued. "Once you know the who, you can control the what. Treat them as a resource, allow them to dig up some secrets - or plausible lies - to safeguard more valuable ones."

As he spoke, he made a point out of impaling a piece of meat with his fork. "If they are able to be suborned, all the better. When it comes to the art of spycraft few things are quite as satisfying as turning another's assets to your own side. Coercion, blackmail, and mystical means are all viable."

It all depended on how she wanted to approach the matter, really.

"Oh, and take a good look at whoever has been telling you no one is spying on you. I suspect they are either incompetent or hiding things."​

Noelle Varanin​

 

[Noelle Varanin]

Noelle continued to watch him, her gaze going distant as she considered ... the ones... that would match those descriptions... A brow shot up. Oh. Oh yes, she hadn't even considered her . While she had learned a great deal from her mother before she herself had stepped down as queen, Noelle had been too young to learn anything in espionage. She simply assumed her mother's power was absolute.

Her shoulders rose and fell in a heavy breath, a pinch of pain forming between her temples.

"Yes, well. Thank you for your input. I will see to it it gets implemented." Her tension was tangible as she picked back up and speared another asparagus.

She had no idea how to even begin implementing this.

It would have been prudent of her then to extend the conversation-- ask for help, ask how he was-- social necessities gave her multiple paths for how she could respond next. Unfortunately she was too stuck in her own head to do any of them. One might say he was seeing a more of her in that moment than anyone had in that court room.

And she was unwell.

She chewed with intention and stared down at her plate, letting silence engulf them both.

 

[Kal]

Consideration gave way to realization, a realization that quickly drifted into a weary silence. She was among the individuals he had been given (in her case quite forcefully) the most time to observe and understand - and he was getting the distinct impression that she was being pushed to or past her limits both by the demands of the role and her own expectations for her own performance, her own independence.

The older sister in a family with at times very distant parents and the young heir to the burden of leadership.

Letting the silence hang for a while with practised ease, the Shadow seemed quite unbothered as he continued to slowly disassemble his meal with near-surgical precision, eyes only rarely leaving her even as she stared down into her plate. Finally, a thoughtful hum broke the silence.

"You don't have to do everything yourself, shoulder every burden on your own, you know." Waving his fork in the general direction of her court, Kal flashed her a smile, pristine teeth gleaming. "Delegate what you can, so long as you can be reasonably sure that it will get done. I might be willing to help you sniff out any relevant secrets, you know." Goodness knew he was uniquely well-suited for such a task.​

Noelle Varanin​

 

[Noelle Varanin]

Noelle rolled her eyes, exclaiming in a rather unplanned degree of stress, "You cannot honestly believe I'd indebt myself to you for a third time."

Her forearms came to rest on the table, both fork and and knife held aloof over the intricate table cloth. "You are skilled but... life debts for small favors? You're going to need new tender if you really are so keen to keep living on this plane."

Her eyes scanned over his body in tell-tail distaste. It wasn't that it was unappealing, it was just unnerving. She couldn't control him anymore. She did not like not being able to control things.

"Our lives are too short to let debts hang over us. Every moment counts, and if you can just come in whenever you please and request something that could cause damage that we cannot see or predict-- You're going to need to figure something else out. You're among the living now."

It was easy to dodge advice if you turn it around and chastise someone back. Ashin taught her that one.

 

[Kal]

Seemingly quite unaffected by her criticism, Kal smiled placidly, taking the smallest of sips from his glass.

"I see the debts you owe worry you - both when they loom on the horizon, consigned to the distant future, and when they seem forthcoming." It was only natural, given how fond she was of control. They were something she could not control and now so was he, not that she had ever truly been in a position to command him, even while he was bound in her jewellery. Only Ashin had proven able to exert such direct influence.

"Truth be told, I find them quite collectable. Debts, that is. It is oddly satisfying, being owed." Which was exactly why he was in no hurry to collect.

"That said, whoever said anything about life debts? I am a Shadow, not a Wookie; I do not deal in absolutes. Anything you owe is proportional to the services rendered." Expression cheerful, he shrugged theatrically. "Besides, you may consider this pro bono unless otherwise stated. No repayment is needed, not even in the credits your subjects treasure so." It seemed an interesting enough way to spend his time - and he did like her.

Not to the point of thinking of her as his favourite mortal - that was probably Melydia Gold - but she was well above average.​

Noelle Varanin​