Private Whistle While You Work

[Lief]

Everything had been rather hectic as of late, since Starlin Rand had returned and found forgiveness in the Order - since he'd taken the young Tetan on as his Padawan. Eliphas' training had truly begun, largely here on Coruscant yet a recent trip to Erakhis had taken him further afield. A few new scars, a little more understanding beneath his belt, he'd come back to the heart of the Galaxy quietly contemplative of all that had happened. And once settled he'd reached out to perhaps the only friend he had in this place, eager to catch up.

But he'd arrived earlier than planned, having had the day off, and when he let himself inside as he had so many times before he found it empty. There was a small mess left behind, no doubt in the morning rush of the two girls who lived here getting ready for the day. Nothing crazy, of course, a couple of dishes, throw pillows from the sofa knocked to the ground, that sort of thing. When he was preoccupied such a mess wouldn't have even bothered him, certainly not when he was in Iris' company. She was all encompassing, after all.

As he lingered though, watching the clock as it ticked down to the end of her physical therapy session, he found himself overcome with a simple need to do something. So he did.

He began simply enough, with the aforementioned dishes which were soon left to drain on the sideboard, then the sofa was put back together, blankets carefully folded and draped over the back. Remote for the holo-tv was set upon the coffee table, and then anything out of place there dealt with. A slightly damp towel on the floor was set into a laundry basket, the countertops wiped down...

Before he knew it, the main living space was sparkling. Eliphas worked quickly enough, efficiency of time learned on The Atale. It was then that his gaze caught sight of the whirlwind beyond Iris' bedroom door. His approach of it had been innocent enough, a shoe and a pair of pajama pants strewn across the threshold. but after he reached for them the rest was revealed. He'd never been inside her room before, he'd always kept a respectful distance, but where she'd done a good job of appearing in control of her depressive funk what he saw on the other side reminded him of just how much looks could be deceiving.

His heart sank.

Without giving it too much thought, without pausing to consider the breach in trust he may have been committing, Eliphas slid the door open further and set to work clearing it up. After all... Everyone was entitled to a calm and clean space to sleep. Iris especially. The curtains were thrown open, if only for his own sake, and he set the air conditioning to cycle in clean air, then with a delicate whistle he got to work.

Iris Arani

 

[Iris Arani]

Therapy had been getting easier. New faces, new friends. That helped, a lot. And being able to do the tasks set out for her, even if it was still a struggle, certainly helped her confidence. Hell, she'd come back late to her apartment because she took the time to go out and shop on her own. Dinner, really. A couple bags. But she could carry them on her own. Walk down the street without her leg cramping to the point of immobilization. Would Lief be proud?

She paused in the doorway, blinking. Oh. Right. Eliphas. He was coming by. She smiled brightly at first, then the horror set in as she remembered that she'd completely forgotten. And that he was probably waiting for her. All this time. Iris rushed as best she could up the stairs to her apartment, practically kicking open the door with how full her hands were. The two bags, which really wasn't that much but enough for her still debilitated self, were set on the counter.

The clean counter. She blinked. Oh. Eli was here? She turned her gaze, scanning for him. She could see his colors and- Oh.

He was in her room.

Iris blinked slowly, stepping over to the open door to her room. What was- He was cleaning? She tilted her head, staring at the organization that had been put into the chaos of her room. Mostly, it was her being messy and uncaring. But there was some system to the chaos. Buried, of course. She really should've cleaned at some point, she just forgot. .. No, she just didn't feel like it.

She said nothing at first, more curiously watching him go through her stuff. Everything was out and about. Clothing, paint supplies, datacrons. Some saucy novels she'd gotten into reading in some attempt to understand what romance and affection was.

".. You didn't have to clean my room."

 

[Lief]

The boy had made sure to be as respectful as he could throughout the process of cleaning the bedroom. Iris wasn't back yet, and ordinarily that would have bothered him but cleaning really was the sort of thing that left him with zero concept of time. For all he knew only a few minutes had passed since he stepped inside.

It hadn't of course.

He hadn't actually looked at any single item in much detail at all. Quick glance, figure out roughly what it was - or more, what category it belonged to - and set it one way or another. Clothes were immediately tossed into a basket, ready to be taken to the washing unit, books set to a place on the bookshelf, etcetera. He took extra special care of the painting and various other art supplies, returning them to their original cases where possible.

Soon it wasn't the clutter which needed to be dealt with at all, it was the actual surfaces themselves. Cleaning down the side tables and the like, freeing them of any dust or dirt. Her sheets probably could have been stripped and cleaned, but he didn't touch that for now focusing instead on all the other things.

By the time that Iris entered the room - her entrance to the apartment going wholly unnoticed by him in the moment - only the floor needed cleaning, and then of course the aforementioned bed. For now the blanket lay folded in place, ready to be dealt with. Of course he didn't get his chance to do that.

He turned his head. All at once realization came crashing down on him... This was her room, her space, and he'd just invaded it like it was nothing.

A very red blush came over him.

"Um... Sorry" he breathed, "I just... I saw a shoe and I went to put it back, and then I saw a book so I put it back and... Before I knew it... Well..."

Force, was she going to hate him?

"I didn't look at anything" he hastily added, "I uh, I mean, I just sort of took it all at face value. Clothes here, books there, I didn't... I never actually..."

He fell silent, and just stared,

Iris Arani

 

[Iris Arani]

Why was he so embarrassed? Iris tilted her head for a moment, watching the colors from Lief . All the colors told her the story of it. Him being honest, but embarrassed. She didn't understand it, really. Instead she walked towards him, then past him. Stripping off her bedding to get that ready for a good clean. Her room had been in a sorry state for far too long. Maybe this was a good thing.

"I don't have anything to hide, so.. You're welcome to look at whatever."

 

[Lief]

It took a moment for him to register that she wasn't even remotely annoyed, much less angry. In fact, Iris stepped past him and took care of stripping down the bed herself, and he found himself shifting slightly to follow her movements with his eyes.

"Oh" was his immediate response, as he shifted his weight from one leg to the other. "Okay." A slight pause, then a smile replaced those worries he'd so suddenly built up. "Here, let me add that to the laundry basket," he offered, reaching over for the bundle of cloth, "I think there's just the floors left to do, really; should we tackle them before I order us some lunch?"

It had sort of become their thing last time they'd been hanging out, neither of them particularly wanted to cook so... Usually, pizza it was.

"I missed you, by the way, while I was on Erakhis. How's physical been treating you, Sunshine?"

Iris Arani

 

[Iris Arani]

She laughed. Just a little, and mostly to herself. Was he really that worried about what she might think of him cleaning? Was that it? Iris passed off the cloth at Eliphas's direction, nodding. There'd probably be a bit more laundry than she expected, if only because she tended to forget.. A lot. When it came to cleaning. Her room at least. Iris frowned a little, staring at the basket, then to the rest of her room.

She was a lot messier than she figured. And it wasn't just because of everything that happened.

".. You were on Erakhis? What were you doing there?" Iris turned her gaze back to Lief , blinking. Curious, more than anything else. Was that why he hadn't been around recently?

"It's been.. Better. I can do more again. I might be able to go on missions again soon." She seemed plenty proud of that fact, smiling bright. Wait. Her smile faded for a moment as she thought back to everything he'd said. She missed something.

Oh!

"I missed you too."

 

[Lief]

She seemed confused to hear that he'd been away from Coruscant, and only then did he realize that he hadn't been very good at communicating while away. A light blush crept into his cheeks. "Oh, uh, we had to save someone from a bunch of cultists" he explained, rather poorly, "She'd been locked in her own mind, so I had to go in and help her out. Apparently it's a process known as Dreamwalking? Nimdok said I was a natural..."

Well he'd said something along those lines at least. Either way, it had taken him a while to fully acknowledge the compliment and by then the moment was over. He smiled, glancing at Iris as he placed the bedding into the laundry basket and then lifted it up ready to be taken out into the main living space. It was... Heavy. Surprisingly heavy. But he could make do.

"I feel like I'm finally making progress, you know?" Another realization struck him then. "Oh! I'm a Padawan now, by the way. Starlin made it official before we left. Have a lightsaber and everything." He sort of half lifted his leg, enough that the hilt would catch the light. It wasn't the greatest looking hilt in existence, in fact it was pretty beat up, but he loved it all the same. It was a reflection of himself, of all that he had endured with the fall of the Atale, a reminder that even with scars one could still be functional, helpful. Could have new life breathed into them.

No doubt that was something Iris had learned too.

His grin positively beamed when she mentioned how much better she was doing.

"Oh Iris, I'm so glad. You've put in so much work, I'm proud of you." The tone was not at all condescending, just filled with excitement and joy. He was about to cross the threshold into the living space when she responded to him. That blush deepened. "I'll try and keep in contact next time we go galivanting off, alright? I just got sort of caught up in the moment. I'm sorry."

Hefting the laundry out into the living room, hoping that she might follow and if not simply raising his voice a little to keep talking, he sought out a good place to set it down until the clothes could be cleaned. "I have a wrist holopad now too, so it should be much easier to call and text and what not..."

It was nice, talking to her like this again. Eliphas found it was just as effortless now as it had been before Erakhis, and he was grateful for that.

Iris Arani

 

[Iris Arani]

Oh.

Oh.

A lot happened for Lief . In truth, she hadn't even realized he wasn't technically a Jedi yet. But now he was, with his own lightsaber and everything! She was all smiles and joy for him, until he mentioned being proud of her. A stubborn part of her that had developed didn't care for someone to be proud of her for doing better. Maybe because it'd come across as condescending. But not with Eli. He was never condescending.

Even now.

So her smile shrank down as a faint blush formed on her cheeks. It was nice to have approval here and there. Especially from someone she cared about. She followed after him, hands behind her back. Letting him carry the basket without protest, for what it mattered.

"Oh yeah. We can text and the like."

 

[Lief]

She blushed, and though he didn't exactly know why he blushed too, a sheepish little smile playing over his expression as she quietly regarded him and all that had been said. Though Iris wasn't one for excessive conversations, more introspective and thoughtful than loud and out there, she remained expressive. At least for him, he'd gotten good at reading her over all their time shared together.

He set the basket down in the kitchen, then glanced around, "Do you have in-unit laundry, or..?" He hadn't seen it, but he also hadn't checked every door and closet in the place so...

Iris agreed to texting more, and so he beamed a smile her way. "Awesome. Alright, I'm hungry. Pizza again? Or do you maybe want to try something else? Chanlactan? Nice and spicy! Or, uh..." He shrugged, moving toward where she was stood now that the basket was gone. Opened his arms up, the way he had done when they'd first met here on Coruscant, only this time without the awkwardness. "Can I have a hug?" He asked her, tone light and playful, "Feels like forever since I was here. You're looking good, by the way, happy. Still painting, I hope?"

Iris Arani

 

[Iris Arani]

Iris nodded before stepping over to one of the out of the way closets. Inside, a stacked washer dryer combo. One of the things Briana had installed so the two didn't have to wander out to do laundry. Not that Iris would've minded. Before at least. Though.. Pizza? She hummed in thought, then shook her head. Grinned. Walked past him towards the kitchen. "Actually, I picked up dinner. Or at least the stuff to make dinner."

Maybe Valery Noble was rubbing off on her more than she'd think. The grin turned to a bright smile as she started pulling out a meal. Steak, potatoes. Herbs and spices. Though she paused.

"Can I have a hug?"

She blinked, staring at one of the potatoes in thought. When was the last time she'd hugged someone? .. The last time she could remember was when she first woke up. After being thrown from the train. She frowned, glancing down to her hand holding the potato.

"Yeah, I've been painting. I started painting the temple again. With permission. .. You can hug me if you want."

 

[Lief]

"Awesome!" the boy said with a grin, lifting up the basket once more and carrying it over to the stacked unit to begin a cycle of laundry. He glanced over his shoulder when she stated she'd actually bought supplies for lunch, and his eyes widened. "Dude, you can cook? Ugh you have to show me sometime, I'm utterly hopeless!"

When the machine was rumbling, he closed the closet door to shut out the noise and stepped over toward her. She didn't seem entirely certain about the whole hug thing, and he didn't want to make her uncomfortable by pressing the subject any further.

"Yeah? I'll have to check it out when it's done. Force knows it could use brightening up some."

He peered at the potato in her hand, and the other ingredients, and his stomach grumbled. Looked like some good, hearty food would be cooked up. Her response to his question had him tilt his head to one side. He could if he wanted to? "Well, it matters more if you want to," he stated, a little more firmly than his usual tone. It was important to him, after all, that she maintain autonomy over herself. Not just have some silly fellow-teen stealing unwanted hugs.

Even without what she'd been through, he'd have advocated for such.

Iris Arani

 

[Iris Arani]

"It's a more recent thing I learned, but yeah. It's nice to cook. It's like, it's own art?" In a way, yeah. She pondered the thought for a moment longer, letting it distract her from the other question Lief brought up. What she wanted, huh? .. She never did figure out what she wanted before. With Kai Bamarri . But that was different, right? Eli was a friend. .. So was Kai. The frustration bubbled up for a moment as she set down the potato. Feelings weren't something she wanted to think about, not right now.

"I dunno. I'll think on it, I guess."

 

[Lief]

"Art? Yeah! I guess it is, isn't it?" Edible art... He couldn't tell if that made it more or less valuable in the long term. Then again, art shouldn't be measured in such a form regardless so he quickly tossed the thought from his mind and set about watching her.

Watching as she set aside the potato and seemed to bristle.

The boy became a little sheepish in the wake of her response, even taking a small step back in hopes that a little space might help her. Though he was far from a great empath, his small foray into the astral planes alongside Jacen Nimdok had left him with a better perception than prior. He couldn't simply glean her emotions of course, but the sudden spike of frustration?

Well, that made itself known.

"Of course; I'm sorry, I shouldn't have brought it up."

By the Empress, he wasn't doing so well today was he?

Iris Arani

 

[Iris Arani]

Now he was apologizing? Iris frowned more, then decided better on it. No, don't think about the things that frustrated her. So instead she pulled a knife. And got to cutting up the potatoes for the home fry part of what would become lunch. "Don't apologize." That'd just make her feel more awkward about it all is what she didn't say. Didn't want to, less it made everything that much more awkward.

Everything was just going to make it more awkward. Why did that have to be so?

"I just don't really hug people I guess? The last time I hugged someone was when I woke up from.. After the train. But there's meaning to it, right? I just, dunno what meaning?"

 

[Lief]

She seemed to be confused by the mere premise of it, of why someone would want to hug? Unless he was reading that wrong... Empress, he really wished he could read emotions at this point, it would make the whole thing far simpler. But he couldn't, so instead he softly sighed and took a step toward her, regaining the space he'd just backed away from.

"Well, I mean, a hug can have lots of meanings," he explained, a thoughtful frown playing over his expression. "A sign of relief, or care, or love, or just because you're happy to see someone. Sometimes it's just instinct, accompanying a fear or protectiveness."

Maybe he was thinking too much into it now. So he softened his expression and smiled.

"I just wanted you to know how much I'd missed you, that's all. But your comfort matters far more than some silly embrace. I guess I'm just not all that good at explaining things, sometimes actions are easier. But... It's okay. C'mon, want a hand with those potatoes? I can scrub them if nothing else!"

Iris Arani

 

[Iris Arani]

And there he went again, talking about her comfort like she didn't know what she might want. Which was true. She didn't, but.. She was starting to reach the point she was tired of people trying to tell her what was best. Between this and Silas Westgard - Iris huffed in annoyance, setting down what she was doing to turn towards Lief . "I told you not to treat me like I'm fragile. I missed you, too, you know. .. I don't get a lot of things and people confuse me all the time. Do you want to hug me?"

 

[Lief]

"I'm not treating you like you're fragile," he stated, visibly and audibly perplexed. He tilted his head to one side, then realized that perhaps he couldn't really make that call for himself. Couldn't invalidate how she felt. "Well... Not meaning to, at least. You didn't seem sure, is all. And I'd be that way with anyone who didn't seem sure. Nobody is owed such gestures. Sorry if it came across that way though..."

Her question hung in the air, and he nodded softly. Solemnly.

"I do."

Boy, he hadn't meant to make things so awkward. He just also didn't want to be a presumptuous ass who didn't consider other's feelings and autonomy. A bumbling fool, that's what he ultimately was...

She'd missed him, he'd missed her, maybe that was part of the problem. Maybe that was making things a little awkward. There'd been no pressure before, and really there wasn't now. Well except for the pressure of his own devising, like he somehow had to make up for lost time.

Which was ludicrous.

Iris Arani

 

[Iris Arani]

Iris let out a sigh. Frustrated? Maybe. Part of her really did think Lief was overthinking all of it. But.. Didn't that mean she was? What was so special about a hug that she wasn't sure if she even wanted one? What part of her was so hesitant over something she'd done before? So she stepped forward, closed the distance. Wrapped her arms around Eli's waist to pull him into a hug.

Yeah. This was fine, right? At first it was awkward. Stiff. But she relaxed, leaned more against him. The last hug she'd gotten was when she first woke up in the hospital. Before the bandages had been taken off. Her vision blurred for a moment, and she blinked the blur away. Only for it to return? What..

Oh. That's why she was so hesitant over something like a hug. With the realization came more tears. A tighter hug. She'd been lonely. Without Domxite, without Kai, she'd just been alone to deal with all of this. Briana had her own troubles. Valery had a newborn. She bottled everything up, kept herself from truly feeling everything. Even when she locked herself away, she never truly mourned what had been lost.

So she cried. Let out all of the anguish and sadness that had been filling her for months.

 

[Lief]

Iris put an end to all their overthought faffing around, and closed the gap between them. Embraced him, stiff at first but soon enough relaxed. In response, he wrapped his arms around her and held her close. Gently at first, though admittedly just a little tighter when he felt her begin to sob against him.

Though it wasn't what he'd intended to happen, the fact that the act could bring with it some catharsis made it all worth it for him. He gently ran a hand along her back, soothing without vocalizing anything, and allowed her to remain that way for as long as she required. No rush and no pressure. His cheek set against the side of her hair, and he breathed in a slow and measured breath.

Eliphas would not be the one to end the hug, he'd wait for her to be ready for that.

Iris Arani

 

[Iris Arani]

She wasn't sure how long she stayed against him. Iris just gripped around his torso as tight as she could. When was the last time she let herself cry like this? When she first woke up, after the train. Not since then. And she needed to. Everything had been so hard, difficult. So she let it all out in heavy sobs until she couldn't cry any more. When she finally reached that point, she just felt.. Drained.

Iris pulled back after a moment, wiping away the tears in her eyes.

"I.. I'm sorry.."