Private Master and Apprentice

[Braze]

TAGS: Jasper Kai'el

Braze nodded slowly, seemingly finally calmed as he rubbed away the remnants of tears and sniffled. He could live with that. "That sounds... nice," he offered slowly, his voice soft-spoken and sluggish, as if his mind were still reeling with thoughts and he was trying to urge himself to remain verbal instead of falling awkwardly silent. He shook his head and moved to step towards the kitchen sink to wash his face and hands, fetching a paper towel to dry off with and generally clean himself up, trying to feel a little better. Slowly but surely, the sad little guy seemed to mellow out and relax.

"Jasper... What are... your dreams?" Braze asked after some quiet time, having cleaned up a little more, seemingly getting ready to be presentable to follow Jasper into a public setting. Braze was much more subdued overall and seemed demure, in a state of sedation of some sort, but he was trying to bridge the gap with conversation. He knew who Jasper was, but didn't know much about who Jasper was now. It seemed like a good time to ask, as Braze was still reflecting on the things his Master had said to him moments ago.

 

[Jasper Kai'el]

Sacorria
Tags: Braze

​

"My dream?" Jasper asked with a chuckle. "It's actually rather stupid if you could believe it. Well, not stupid as in it would be terrible, but more because it's impossible."

He sighed, tucking his hands into his pockets.

"Let me tell you, after living through the Hyperspace War, intergalactic peace sounds real nice," he laughed. "But I know the truth. Greed, lust for power, enjoyment of carnage... these aren't things you can just snap out of existance. I do what I can to spread peace, but what I really want? Well, it's a fool's dream."

Jasper flipped open his holopad, mindlessly making a series of presses to order them some food. It was almost like he had done it a thousand times. He gave an exhale as he continued to speak.

"But we live in strange times... Fools move the galaxy forwards."

 

[Braze]

TAGS: Jasper Kai'el

Braze listened intently for a moment. "I think you're right... that's not going to be possible... maybe an early retirement might be nice... Do you have any other goals?" he asked as he began cleaning up the breakfast they never touched. "Maybe you have one closer to my ability to assist with?" He tried to promote that sentiment, although he doubted its feasibility. "Was that your goal when you were my age?"

 

[Jasper Kai'el]

Sacorria
Tags: Braze

"Assist me?" Jasper remarked. "Well, you sort of already have been helping, in a way. My sober goal, if you will, is to leave behind something meaningful... A family. A little mark of light in the galaxy where I once stood. It doesn't have to be by blood, of course, more so a network of people I can inspire to better themselves and the world around them."

"Was that your goal when you were my age?"

Jasper laughed, reflecting back on his youth. He certainly did have a dream, but it wasn't as complex as anything else he had right now. In fact, it was so mundane that he had already achieved it.

"Well, it's not exactly a dream anymore," he chuckled. "More than anything else as a boy I wanted to be a Jedi Knight. Rise to the coveted rank that held the weight of thousands who rose up to defend civilization against the darkness. It's more funny in hind sight, cause I did wind up making it to Knighthood and even rising to the council, but when I was a padawan? There was a part of me that was certain I'd never make it. I watched one by one as my peers all advanced, many of whom who hadn't been at the Temple as long as I had, and I kept thinking to myself that my time had passed." Jasper gave a shrug. "Ultimately it was a product of my own self-doubt. I graduated when I was eighteen, no clammering from the masters to hold me back. I was just as worthy as all of my peers had been. I just needed to prove it to myself first."

Self worth had been one of the most important things he had learned. Had he not, many more lives may have been lost. Jasper had never expected one man could change so much, but he saw what the work he did could do. Learning to trust in your own abilities could change everything in someone else's life. Even one person was a big impact.

"Are those a little more realistic for you?"

 

[Braze]

TAGS: Jasper Kai'el

Braze nodded softly as he washed up and placed the dishes on the drying rack. "Yeah... they are," he offered softly, his mind dwelling on the weight of their conversation. "I think I can help with that," he added with a weak smile. "I've been thinking about it... and I don't want to hurt your feelings, but I don't want anyone to think you give me preferential treatment because of this... the concept of family isn't completely foreign to me, but my picture is a little fuzzy... can we talk about what kind of family you want to have?" Braze asked, his tone gentle yet probing. He understood that Jasper hadn't experienced much in terms of familial bonds before, and he wondered who Jasper looked up to. "I want to keep our family life somewhat private, if that's okay? I also want to... kind of learn about your ancestry and where your family comes from... so I can understand it better... if that's okay?"

 

[Jasper Kai'el]

Sacorria
Tags: Braze

​

I've been thinking about it... and I don't want to hurt your feelings, but I don't want anyone to think you give me preferential treatment because of this...

Jasper would give a laugh to this.

"You're not getting special treatment," he assured. "And I don't think anyone will see it that way with you. No padawan in the order trains as rigerously as you do. You don't need to convince anyone of anything... but I'm fine with keeping this private. I perfer things that way."

He wasn't a stranger to private life. Jasper had begun dating, inherrited a home, and now adopted, all outside of the eye of the New Jedi Order. He'd much rather keep all of that to himself. It was his own business after all.

"Oh, my ancestory?" the Knight echoed. "Well, we can start with my home. I inherrited it when my... well, I'll call him my creator. The guy my DNA was derived from. I was closest of kin by default I guess, so it transfered to me when he died. The home is probably like 7000 years old, built by a really distant ancestor of mine. A Jedi. It... runs in the family, I guess. He left the order after the Mandalorian Wars and settled down with his family. It's funny, the furnature was still in pretty good shape when I first saw the place. It just needed to be polished up."

A slight frown came to his face.

"I very much grew up disconnected from my family," he noted. "Jalen too. We both were kind of left to our own devices, seperate from this place. It's strange to think about what I could have been a part of growing up..."

 

[Braze]

TAGS: Jasper Kai'el

​

"I know I'm not currently getting special treatment... But I don't want anyone to throw that in my face if they know," Braze offered lightly, his voice filled with apprehension. "People don't often learn everything about something before throwing it out there to be a jerk... and it's easy for rumors to spread. Ya know?"

He listened carefully to what he had to say. "So you have a long history with the Jedi?" Braze asked, genuinely intrigued. "Service to the order and all that? I wonder what... your creator's... parents were like... You never met them, huh?" Braze's curiosity flourished as he thought about Jasper's origins.

"Do you know if there is a legacy to the Kai'el name?" Braze asked, eager to learn more about Jasper. "Where was it you were... made?" He hesitated slightly, feeling awkward phrasing it that way but pressing on nonetheless. "Do you know what day it was?"

 

[Jasper Kai'el]

Sacorria
Tags: Braze

​

"No, I understand," Jasper assured.

The topic shifted again.

"I... did meet my creator," the knight noted with a frown. "As for anyone further back then that? Well... can't say any were alive for me to meet, let alone learn about. I think my... well, he was in his eighties. Anyone before him is well and truly dust by now."

That front couldn't really be helped. What they were like was something he'd probably never know.

Oh well.

"A lab on Lothal," he stated bluntly to his next question. "I'm not sure the day exactly. Most records were destroyed when raiders went through the place a good ten years ago now. I have a general idea about the year, but everything more detailed than that has since been lost to time." Jasper snickers a little. "If you're wanting to throw me a birthday party or something, Jalen's record survived. We've been sharing a birthday for a while now."

Things were easier like that anyways. It gave him and his little brother a good chance to spend time together. They had increasingly less of that with his duties to the council and Jalen being so active as a healer in the field.

 

[Braze]

TAGS: Jasper Kai'el

"If that's what you would like, I have no problems with that," Braze replied, his tone thoughtful. "It seems that you and Jalen are the family
's legacy. " He moved to fetch the feather, twirling the quill between his fingers as he approached Jasper. "Can I keep this, or no?" he asked, once again presenting it to Jasper.

 

[Jasper Kai'el]

Sacorria
Tags: Braze

​

Jasper squinted at the feather. It seemed... normal.

"Yeah, I guess," the knight sighed. "Just... let me know if it starts doing anything weird."

He didn't want to make the conversation any more down than it had been. They both had made important steps in working out the details of their relationship, so it was better to not press. It felt normal anyways. He had gotten pretty good at detecting things that had a dark side presence, and this seemed to be a regular feather by every which way he observed it. He let all of that slip from his mind as he tried to think of a different direction for the conversation.

It was about that time, thankfully, that he heard the whirring of a delivery droid outside the door. Jasper stepped out, bringing the pizza he had ordered back in. There was no deeper thought, almost an instinct by now, as he threw the box down on the table, opening it up and taking a slice. He hardly seemed to mind how hot it was, sinking his teeth in even as steam wafted off the top.

"Alright," he exhaled. "Food get. Sorry about your cooking gettin' cold. Twice."

The knight gave an awkward chuckle as he continued to eat.

 

[Braze]

TAGS: Jasper Kai'el

​

"Alright," Braze chirped, deftly fixing the pretty feather back into his braid as if it were some kind of decoration. He was pleased to finally have something to eat and eagerly took a seat at the table. "What's your favorite type of pie to get?" he asked curiously as he settled in and carefully used the little pizza 'table' to tear off a piece and separate it and serve himself a single slice. That was good enough for him.

 

[Jasper Kai'el]

Sacorria
Tags: Braze

​

"What's your favorite type of pie to get?"

Jasper gave a soft laugh.

"Good ice breaker," he noted with some teasing. It was probably good to change the subject. "I'm not picky... but there's a particular cheese pizza I have a fondness for. It's from a place in the Coruscant underbelly. I used to go there all the time as a kid with... Well, with my friends."

His friends who weren't really around these days. There were tons of folks he went on all kinds of adventures in the underbelly with as a Padawan... Iris Arani , Ichika Masudo , Jand Talo ... He hardly saw them anymore. Jasper missed them dearly, but he understood that they all had their own lives now. Their own responsibilities. There was simply not much time to spend with them these days. Hell, he'd even take Corin Trenor if he had to. Unfortunately there really wasn't anyone around from his generation, aside from the occasional sighting of Silas Westgard .

Maybe he had been more lonely over these last few years than he had thought.

"It has sentimental value," Jasper decided with a shrug. "I don't think it's really the quality of the slice more than it is thinking back to the moment. Nostalgia and all that." The knight gave a sigh. "But that's the thing about nostalgia. Admitting you have it is an admission that something in your life is already passed. I'm not really one for lingering on the past, so I don't go to that place much these days. But every now and then I take a trip down memory lane."

Obsessing over the past wasn't healthy, but forgetting it wasn't either. Everyone needed to know how to strike a balance. This was his, in his own strange way.

 

[Braze]

TAGS: Jasper Kai'el

​

"The underbelly, huh? I've not been there very much, but I've been a few times in recent memory," Braze stated softly. He nibbled on his food and let a small sigh escape as he relaxed back, staring at Jasper for a moment as he contemplated life briefly while enjoying his pizza.

"Do you wanna play a game?" Braze asked, deciding that perhaps pestering Jasper relentlessly with questions might be pretty fun. "It's called the question game... We take turns asking one another questions... um... I think there's supposed to be some kind of penalty if we don't want to answer, but I can't think of a good one."

 

[Jasper Kai'el]

Sacorria
Tags: Braze

​

"A game, huh?" Jasper mused, scratching his chin as he thought. "Sure, why not. I doubt you'll get a question I won't answer, so I may as well take the easy win."

He let out a chuckle.

Ah, but what question to ask... He didn't want to just go out the gate swinging. He wasn't exactly sure what kind of things they should be asking, so it was probably for the best that he let Braze go first, just so he could get an idea of what it was this game entailed. He took another bite of his pizza before turning his attention back to his student.

"You go first," he suggested. "So I can see what the game should be like."

 

[Braze]

TAGS: Jasper Kai'el

​

Braze settled back, appearing rather thoughtful for a moment. He seemed to be deeply considering something for a solid minute.

"Okay... Do you have plans of giving me any siblings in the near future?" he asked, more so wanting to know what to expect from their family structure and what kind of life Jasper envisioned now. Braze was aware that Jasper had someone he was invested in romantically, but he didn't know if they intended on starting a family together or not. So, why not start with that? It seemed sensible.

 

[Jasper Kai'el]

Sacorria
Tags: Braze

​

Jasper was taken aback by the question, giving a laugh.

"Jeez, going straight for the personal questions I see," he noted with a chuckle. "Uh... yeah, I do. At least one, sometime later down the line. I have this whole home... may as well have someone else to live in it come around, y'know?"

He and Marissa... they weren't ready yet. They needed time, but one of these days they'd figure all of that out and get a kid made. It would just take a little bit of mental prep work before that point. In the meantime, he was more than happy to give his energy towards Braze. That was where his current cares lied.

Right, so he probably had to ask his own question now.

"You've... been building lightsabers," Jasper stated. "I've noticed you collecting parts. Given your craftsmanship, you don't seem half bad. Where'd you start tinkering?"

That was something more his pace. Jasper was a known tinkerer, and he wanted to know what lead Braze to start building.

 

[Braze]

TAGS: Jasper Kai'el

Braze nodded. "I have to know how long I might get to selfishly have you all to myself before I gotta start acting more like an older brother," Braze chirped with a wry grin. "Maybe you can retire and settle down and focus on family?" Braze suggested thoughtfully, seeing as he thought Jasper seemed fairly stressed quite often. He decidedly didn't finish his bready crusts and set them aside on his plate.

He thought about what Jasper said.

"I like to create all kinds of things," he stated softly.

"I really want to become a Master at combat and do my Echani heritage justice. I'm pretty sure my father's family was part of some fancy type of military guard. So I want to learn about weapons." He ran his fingers down his braid and toyed with some of the beads. "I've decided this is the kind of study pursuit I want to follow... I don't just make lightsabers... I make other things too that aren't exactly tech stuff... I like to uh... I like to sculpt. I make little statues... but uh... I enjoy building things, doesn't matter what.I was actually drafting something to maybe help me use my arm... but I'm not very experianced with it. I was hoping you might beable to help me with it."

Barze concluded thinking about it all. "When did you start tinkering?" Braze decided to ask wondering if Jasper did it before he needed a new arm.

 

[Jasper Kai'el]

Sacorria
Tags: Braze

​

"Maybe you can retire and settle down and focus on family?"

"Jeez, I'm not that old yet," Jasper laughed before giving a sigh. "I'll... settle down one day. But I can't yet. That's something for future me to figure out..."

He understood the give and take that came with being a member of the Jedi Council, or just being an important intergalactic figure for that matter. People needed him, and his presence did have an effect on wider galactic affairs. That came at the cost of his time. Still, he knew the value of the work that he did. There would be time to settle down. Jasper wasn't very old after all, still in his mid-twenties. It wasn't something he had to rush into.

"Thinking about a brace?" the knight asked. "I've kind of been thinking about the same, but nowhere close to drafting a design yet. If you give me what you have, I can probably whip something up."

Braze didn't want a prosthetic after all. He wanted to make sure that his student could continue to use his limbs, but comfortably at that. He absorbed the other information as well, the talk about wanting to be a master of combat, trying to reconnect with his Echanic culture, the history of his biological father...

"When did you start tinkering?"

"Forever, I think," Jasper remarked, scratching his chin. "I've been taking things apart since I can remember, trying to understand how they work. By the time I was ten I had abandoned my dorm and begun living out of an old Z-95 Headhunter that I salvaged and parked in the hangar at the Temple. Tech used to be a crutch for me as a kid. Becuase I'm rather weak in the force, I used inventions as a supplement for natural talent. I needed the edge to keep up with my peers. It was time well spent ultimately. I've designed all kinds of starships and pieces of equipment that Jedi across the galaxy are using to save lives." He gave a shrug. "Not that I plan on stopping. Tinkering is kind of an instinct now. I just... start doing it whenever I have some free time."

Jasper noted Braze not eating the crust of his pizza. He'd take the remaining crust and begin to eat it himself. No sense letting it go to waste.

"So," he continued. "Master of combat, huh? Sounds like you want to be a Battlemaster."

 

[Braze]

TAGS: Jasper Kai'el

​

Braze didn't seem to mind Jasper taking the bready-er parts of his remains to eat.

"I can understand the desire to keep up... I just don't think I fit in with my peers," Braze admitted gently.

"I used to try and just do what everyone older was doing... now with the younger ones... well, I don't know how to act around them either. I feel like I don't really belong to any particular group. I feel like I'm supposed to fit in, but something's just... off," he explained.

"I think some of my peers might be in a similar situation... I'm not really sure," he added.

"I don't know if I want to be a battle master. That's what Aris Noble wants to do. There's no way for me to compete with him either. He's going to outpower me every time... and he reads a lot, so I'm not sure I can outsmart him either. He's also a lot more durable... And I'm... well, I'm already broken... and I think he probably has a step up on me in training too... but I'm not really sure. It seems to me like he has it all... or like he was made for that role," Braze concluded, looking very thoughtful.

"I don't think anyone takes me seriously," he added, seeming to reflect on this. "I don't think I've earned any respect from anyone... I couldn't be a battle master for that reason alone," Braze added.

 

[Jasper Kai'el]

Sacorria
Tags: Braze

​

"I won't have any of that out of you."

Jasper wasn't going to let him talk himself down yet again. No, this was different. He was selling himself short, and Jasper knew better than anyone that he was capable of far more if he put his mind to it.

"Beating Aris doesn't matter. What you think your peers think about you doesn't matter," the knight noted. "The rank of Battlemaster isn't exclusive, and you certainly don't have to prove that you're better than someone else. It's about building up skill through hard work and determination. If you earn the respect of the people around you, it will be through the merit of your actions and your dedication. Don't consider yourself broken. Consider yourself delt a different hand. You have a different set of cards, you only need to stack them in your favor." Jasper gave a sigh, sitting down as he reached for another slice of pizza. "You can't let this fester. Fear holds us back. It keeps us from ultimately doing what we wish to achieve. Leaps not taken yield no prize. And think about this from the other side of the coin."

He'd take a moment to shift in his seat.

"Aris has a limitation on how he can use the force," Jasper explained. "Imagine being restricted to internal abilities, then suddenly having to face down a prodegy who's been able to pick up a handful of powerful abilities in such a short period of time, all while you can't even muster a force push. You've let Aris become the manifestation of what you see as wrong with yourself and you've never stopped to think about the fact that he's in the same boat. You make him out to be amazing in every way, but people aren't perfect. I certainly wasn't. Hell, ask me on a bad day and I'd tell you I'm a hack. A fraud who weaseled his way to a position of power through dumb luck, even if I know for a fact that isn't true." He gave a sympathetic smile. "Nobody's perfect, kid. These things aren't about perfection. It's about care and dedication. The willingness to pick yourself up when you fall down."

The Sentinel of Harmony believed this with every fiber of his being. Nothing trumped hard work. Jasper didn't care how perfect anyone was. The drive to move forward and keep fighting was something that he had seen overcome all adversity. This is how ants topled giants, how mortals slew gods. Braze just had to have the resolve to keep himself moving forward.

"You can't do any of that if you keep yourself off the ground," he sighed. "Accepting your fears as fact only manifests them into reality. Aris is going to beat you because you believe he will, even if ultimately you aren't really competing at all."

And that was the truth of the matter.