A Wild Flower (Solan Charr)

[Morgana Forceborn]

At first Morgana thought [member="Solan Charr"] was going to give her the whole talk of how she just had to keep at it until she got it right. Something she heard all the time from the Jedi, or how she had to learn control without letting it control her. Something vauge like that. But when he talked about what went through her mind she perked. It was true. She actually did have those thoughts. She only looked to him and gave her silent answer, the look in her eyes a confirmation to him that it was true.​

 

[Aithne Charr]

[member="Morgana Forceborn"]

He smiled and nodded. "Look Morgana, Not everyone is a natural, like i said i burned myself a thousand times trying to control a power..." His hands reached to eachother and removed his gloves to reveal hands that were, while healed significantly, still heavily damaged in the looks department. "Granted, yes i could get the skin replaced, fixed, touched up. Make it look like it never happened... but its a reminder. Of the pain that it takes, the effort it takes." His hands moved and he smiled as he held out the hands with the palms face up.

"Controlling the force can be done in several ways. Surrendering yourself to it like the Jedi come to do, Forcing it to your will like the Sith teach, connecting and being one with it like what i believe, and even viewing it as an all powerful god who's usage is restricted like the Aing-Tii. You must understand that there are many ways that you can work with the force, and this is where my preaching ends and a lessen begins if you mind listening to me for a bit longer?" He smiled at her, if she would accept he would teach her how he summoned up the force and how he controled it and let it simply flow through him. If she didn't he would let the subject drop and suggest a walk to clear her mind.

 

[Morgana Forceborn]

Looking at his hands Morgana eyes were a little suprised as the rest of her. Seeing the remaining marks of the burns was a little unsettling. But she accepted that she wasn't the only one to lose control at times. Hearing him explain the ways of control with the force helped as well. When he offered more lessons she nodded, turning herself fully to his direction. A sign of her fullest attention was on him now. She wanted to know how someone like [member="Solan Charr"] learned to control it in the hopes that she would know too. She seemed to have an odd connection with him that just seemed natrual.​

 

[Aithne Charr]

[member="Morgana Forceborn"]

"Ill teach you the Jedi friendly understanding of how i use the force, don't need Corvus and co breaking down my door for teaching someone the darkside. Boy would that not be a fun time to have her looking in on my nefarious plans of world domination through way of Gardening." He grinned as he made the joke about the masters like [member="Corvus Raaf"] and [member="Kian Karr"]. Jedi he more than respected as... odd as they were. Then there was that Twilek he had seen once... though her name didn't really come to mind too quickly.

"Anyways, you see. I use emotions as my medium for the use of the force. The standard ones they warn you about like hate, anger, yada yada. Ya, i know, darkside and all. But there are good emotions too... well good is relative as technically all emotions are 'good' as someone without emotions would be inhuman... Right, sorry. New to this whole teaching thing. Anyways the emotions that the Jedi order generally accept in cases where your emotions are needed are those of compassion, selflessnes, kindness. And Love... but this one i must further talk about... first though tell me. Have the Jedi elaborated to you why love is a dangerous emotion yet still one of the lightside?"

 

[Morgana Forceborn]

As he cracked his jokes she only gave him an odd look, obviously not getting them. She only sat and listned as [member="Solan Charr"] explained about emotions before asking if she knew the concept of love to the Jedi. "Yes. It can be a selfish emotion, one that clouds judgement and all. But at the same time it is one that keeps us balanced. Love for the people. Love for Order. Love for peace. That is what the Jedi strive for. So in a way it's more for love of others, not yourself or what you want."​

 

[Aithne Charr]

[member="Morgana Forceborn"]

He laughed and nodded. "Good to see their teaching are still the same. Of course there is that but another interpretation is not simple loving others but why love is such a dangerous emotion. Love can lead to one's judgement being clouded, yes. But It is as you said a balance. It is also an emotion that has strength to it few others can match... hate being one of those. Its because Love is a primal emotion, one that drove people to create acts of lust of acts of charity. Love is sometimes the single emotion that one needs for control over their power... Do you love your aunt?"

 

[Morgana Forceborn]

The question almost took her aback before answering "Of course I do. She's family after all. Why?" The way he desribed love before made her a little anxious to hear the answer to come. She hoped it wasn't something about letting go of her feelings for her own aunt.​

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[member="Solan Charr"]​

 

[Aithne Charr]

[member="Morgana Forceborn"]

He blinked and smiled as he felt the anxiety. "If i were to kill, or torture Taeli. Harm her or damage a part of her body. How would you react, how would you feel, and what would you do?" He watched her calmly, letting the situations play through her mind and letting her understand what came of those situations. "Would you kill me, cry, breakdown maybe?"

 

[Morgana Forceborn]

Even though it was hypethetical Morgana's hand baled into a fist and her face almost sneered. "I'd make sure you'd never touch her again if you did." she answered, her eyes burning at the idea of anyone hurting her aunt.​

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[member="Solan Charr"]​

 

[Aithne Charr]

[member="Morgana Forceborn"]

He watched her and leaned forward, saying and doing nothing. Not even giving her a trace of an emotion and letting her think out what was just said and felt.

 

[Morgana Forceborn]

She was quiet for a moment before, after thiking on it, saying "Wait, just because I said that doesn't mean I'd kill you. I...I could find a way. But I would never let anyone harm my aunt Taeli. Besides she's strong enough on her own. She's a powerful force user. No way I'd ever need to worry about someone getting the better of her." she shrugged it off with an annoying groan and added "You're making it confusing now."​

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[member="Solan Charr"]​

 

[Aithne Charr]

[member="Morgana Forceborn"]

"The situation remains though, i some how without you being able to stop it cause her great pain or kill her. And you would bring yourself to do what. What would you feel. Why would you do it.... It may be confusing but my point will be clearer once we can determine if you understand my point of not in bringing up such a situation." He would give her no hint as to what was the right answer and what was the wrong one. She would need to find out how her emotions worked in this moment and understand them.

 

[Morgana Forceborn]

"I....I don't know." she said, sounding more desperate now. "I just...I don't want to lose my own aunt to someone or something. She's...she's all I have." The clear tone in her voice and the look in her eyes showed how upset she was by the idea and situation. "If anyone did harm her I... I'd stop them. I'd do whatever I'd think was best." She sounded more desperate just to make it clear she didn't know what to do than anything else. What was [member="Solan Charr"] trying to get at with her?​

 

[Aithne Charr]

[member="Morgana Forceborn"]

"And if i were to hold a blade to her neck, stare at you, and describe the acts that had been done to her. Laughing with no emotion, no hesitation, and no care before killing her. How would you react. What would you do and what would you think of me." He remained sitting where he was. She was close to the answer, she was close to understanding what he was getting at. All she needed was that one last step and she would understand. He had to be careful though, he didn't want her to turn, no that was not his point at all... she needed to understand why Love was dangerous to a jedi.

 

[Morgana Forceborn]

"What? What do you want me to say? That I shouldn't care that you just beat and tourtured my own aunt? That I should let go of my emotions? Because love's too dangerous? Is that it? Because maybe that's true, but just because I need to focus doesn't mean I'm going to let go. My family is my strength. Letting go of them doesn't make things better. Neither does not taking action when something happens to them. I need to be there to help when I can, and I intend to be."​

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[member="Solan Charr"]​

 

[Aithne Charr]

[member="Morgana Forceborn"]

He smiled and shook his head. "Never let go of your emotions. Control them. That is my point Morgana. And i have a feeling you understand a bit as to my point but not all of it. You see i myself would react without hesitation. I would gut the men, kill him and make sure he was cut apart so that he could not only hurt my family ever again but anyone else... and that is why i am a darksider. I would let my rage, my pain, my worry. All of it seep out and then use it too make sure he never moved or breathed again... But would you is my point. Would you kill them in a fit of rage, or would you do as you are taught and simply disable them. Would you take revenge on them, cut them up. Teach them the pain they taught your aunt, teach me the pain i taught your aunt, or would you disable them, controlling your love and not letting dark emotions fuel you? My point was to show you that Love leads to anger and the other emotions of the dark, things as a jedi you are not meant to use. Do you understand?"

 

[Morgana Forceborn]

His talk was getting to Morgana. It was clear as she pulled back, realizing what he was trying to say. It was true. The way she sounded made it seem as if she were ready to kill the man who attacked her aunt, but out of revenege than anything else. The Jedi were not about revenge but order. Yes it would pain her, and yes it would get to her, but she had to be stronger. Because if that were to ever happen, would her aunt Taeli really want her to fall down that dark path? Likey not.​

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With a deep sigh she said "I....I think I understand now. If that's the case then...then I'd take the man alive. He'd face judgement, and then his fate would be decided."​

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[member="Solan Charr"]​

 

[Aithne Charr]

[member="Morgana Forceborn"]

He smiled, good to see that she had answered. "With that said, we get to what i want you to practice right now. And that is the generation of a set amount of energy and keeping it at that level and with the original source of your drawing from. I will then introduce to you stimuli either by way or mental images, sounds, or even trying to trick your mind into feeling something... Keep in mind that none of it is real, no matter what i show you, none of it is real. Ok?"

 

[Morgana Forceborn]

The way he made it sound didn't sit right with Morgana. Whatever [member="Solan Charr"] had in mind was obviously going to leave some sort of impression on her. How deep? Who knew? But if this was to help her miantain control on her powers then so be it. As long as she was able to keep her influence over the force under control. She only nodded to him to indicate she was ready, as she;d ever be.​

 

[Aithne Charr]

[member="Morgana Forceborn"]

"I want you to life this with the force, at chest height for as long as you can. Ok?" He fished out of his pocket a datapad and set it on the floor. It was simple what he was going to do, at first he would give her simple changes in sound and their direction, some tricks of the eyes. The basics that while annoying were not too bad. Then he would if she stayed calm and devoted he would start to implant memories and thoughts to throw her off. All the while he would keep track of how she thought and wait for when her doubt or emotions started to get in the way or if she did it right, when her emotions would be able to strengthen her abilities.