Starlin was seemingly having the time of his life, meeting his master in combat. It felt almost effortless, a welcome break from the hard work and laser focus that had characterized his previous attempts at dueling—
Then suddenly Syd was pulling away, turning off her blade, yelling at him to
snap out of it, don’t listen. He hesitated, freezing up. Why was she so upset? Had he done something wrong?
"I shouldn't have used Juyo. Not here. You weren't ready. I wasn't ready either. The Nexus was feeding on the combat. Turn away from your negative emotions. They're especially poisonous here..."
Starlin turned off his saber. He was still confused.
“I… uh, thought I was doing pretty good,” he said sheepishly.
Finally, he understood the source of her fear. It was the martial form she had introduced to him, Juyo. Something about it was too aggressive. The combatant risked going too far when employing it in a fight.
Starlin accepted what she told him, though he still wasn’t sure how the darkness had managed to reach him so easily and quickly. The truth was, he hadn’t even registered the presence of the Dark Side creeping in during the fight. Part of this ignorance was due to his lack of experience. Another part was his lack of maturity, and the emotional volatility that came with being a teenager. At his age, he was just beginning to learn how to regulate his feelings at the most basic level, let alone how they projected through the Force.
In short, while he might not understand how it happened, he could see how it might be a problem.
“It’s fine,” he replied, feeling even more uncomfortable about the whole thing now that she was asking him for forgiveness.
“I forgive you. It’s okay.”
But just like that, they were done practicing for the day. Starlin took off his cap and ran a hand through his hair.
“Phew. I could go for a shower right about now.”
Since there was no clean running water to be found, he took a seat near where Syd was kneeling, crossing his legs. After a little while, he changed his position, drawing his knees up to his chest and bowing his head.
He was thinking about his mother. More specifically, he had an image in his head of her sitting across from him in their crummy living room, with the fake black marble coffee table between them. She was listening to Nimdok drone on about archaeology, but every now and then her gaze would dart to her son, focusing on his face, a crease developing between her eyebrows.
Back on Jerrilek, he had predicted she would be easy to convince. He was wrong. Nimdok had smooth-talked her for what seemed like hours, but
Jen Rand had never fully come around to the idea of Starlin becoming his assistant, leaving home for weeks or even months on end, getting in all kinds of trouble. What had happened here on Zeffo so far was exactly the sort of thing she was afraid of.
Holding up his lightsaber hilt, he ran his fingers over the weapon. It had been slow to sink in, the weight of what was happening to him. What he was becoming. Glorifying or debasing, glamorous or gritty, every story he’d ever heard could not prepare him for what it truly meant to be a Jedi. Yet here he was, with a lightsaber, with a master, with knowledge of the Force.
He wanted to know everything. Deep down he knew it was impossible to know everything about something as boundless and eternal as the Force. That didn’t mean he couldn’t try, spending his life learning everything he could.
Fifty minutes later…
The sound of running water was everywhere, and so was the sharp odor of blood and decay. There were a lot of dead bodies in this particular area, an insane amount really. It felt more like a killing field in the aftermath of an ancient battle than a drainage duct.
He waited at the bottom of the service ladder as Syd checked the next level out. When she gave the all-clear, he put his hand on the bottom rung, then paused. Hadn’t he learned how to fly like her?
Putting away his weapons, he closed his eyes, centering himself. He pictured his body becoming weightless, floating upwards through the hatch...
A few seconds later, he banged his head on the ceiling.
“Aw chit,” he hissed in pain, rubbing the top of his head. He started to sink back down, but quickly reached out and grasped the ladder, hauling himself through the hole.
You see, the thing about gore and body parts is, if you’re just looking at them, you can almost trick yourself into believing they’re fake. But you can’t deny the smell. The gore-splattered room reeked of death. Starlin broke into a fit of coughing as soon as it hit him, covering his nose and mouth to stifle himself and keep out the stench.
With his arm still over his face, he unhooked his lightsaber from his belt, holding it at the ready. He noticed the heat ripple shortly after her and forced himself to grab his gun with his other hand, nearly gagging on the horrible air.
The witches charged at him. He fired the Heavy Incendiary Rounds at them, watching in amazement as the flash fire commenced. The hags screamed and flailed as they burned. One fell, either already dead or too wounded to continue. The other flung off her charred robes and charged at him from across a much shorter distance.
Aside from being scarred for life by the sight of a naked, disgusting old scow lunging for him, Starlin barely caught her initial blow. She was fast. He had to be faster. Practicing with Syd meant he had experience with fighting the double-bladed saber, but this was real combat, a life or death situation—
Don’t think about that, he told himself.
All right, think about it a little. But don’t let it be your focus. Pay attention—ha! Did you see that? How about that? And that?...
He was vaguely aware of Syd fighting the others, but the witch took up most of his focus. At the back of the mind there was that thought,
using Juyo would make this go much faster, but he didn’t dare slip into the infamous martial form no matter how much easier it would make things. Relying on his faithful defense, he was still locking sabers with the witch by the time Syd finished with her opponents.
Syd Celsius