Private Confessions of An Alcoholic

[Inanna Harth]

“And here I thought relaxation was primarily a Jedi thing,” Inanna murmured. “The Sith always seemed rougher, harder, more brutal. The other acolytes I’ve been among are always so paranoid, afraid of someone plunging a knife into their back. They certainly don't expect a back massage.”

The Jedi and the Sith still both had to be taught, even if their doctrines and teaching methods were quite different. And if a student couldn’t trust their own teacher, the source of their knowledge, how could they ever hope to learn?

Inanna did not yet trust Vanessa completely. This was still only their third meeting. She didn’t know what it would take to get her to trust her master, but it seemed like giving it time was the best option.

Onrai

 

[Onrai]

“I tried that at one point.” She said. “As you can guess, it didn’t work out well. My first apprentice very literally stabbed me in the back in order to save her own skin. Suffice to say, I’ve learned cooperation and building bonds of trust and friendship within the Sith is more beneficial than repetitive backstabbing.” She said.

“The brutality comes down to the choices we have to make. If I have to sacrifice a thousand innocent lives so that most of those in my domain can benefit, I will. A Jedi doesn’t know how to compromise - it’s always “light light light” and “good versus evil.” So annoying.” She have an extra push into Inanna’s lower back, hearing an audible crunching as the bone shifted a bit.

“Trust between student and teacher is also very important. Otherwise I cannot trust you to not kill me in pursuit of my secrets, nor can you trust me to let you know everything that I know.” She continued to work on Inanna’s back, pulling back the blanket and pulling her left leg over to one side so she could work on that.

“You really want to feth Adrian Vandiir, don’t you.”

Inanna Harth

 

[Inanna Harth]

Inanna winced at the audible crunching of her bones, disturbed more by the sound than the feeling. Under Vanessa’s kneading hands she felt brittle, creaky and… old. Yet for her species, she was still considered fairly young.

Vanessa’s remark about Adrian Vandiir seemingly came out of nowhere. Inanna raised her head to glare over her shoulder at her master, then managed to stifle her first reaction—indignation and shame—in favor of letting the comment roll off her back. “Feth him?” she echoed with a snort. “What do you think I am, a whore?”

But her attempt at a joke fell flat. Sighing, she turned away again, resting her head on her arms. “No,” she said firmly. “Not really. Whatever idiotic fantasies you might have found when you dug into my mind are just that: meaningless, stupid fantasies. I would have to be a moron to actually pursue him. Besides, he’s already taken—by a woman far more powerful and better suited to him than me.”

Onrai

 

[Onrai]

"No. Just someone who really wants what they can't have." She said, chuckling softly. "I've seen it so many times - it's arguably similar to my relationship with the Emperor." She responded, continuing to work on softening the muscles of Inanna's leg. "I knew him back before he was anyone of any worth. More than most if not all of his wives, depending on the story. We had a relationship at one point that occasionally still inflames itself today, but I could never truly love him. He's incapable of love and already has attention divided amongst his brood."

She sighed, listening to Inanna. "Fantasy can often become reality, you know. I fantasized about freedom from my slavery, and suffice to say things are quite good nowadays. And he has more than one woman he's interested in - perhaps you should even talk to..." She focused for a moment. "Ingrid, her name is? Talk to her, see if she may be interested. You might be surprised how malleable certain people can be in the throughs of passion."

With the leg proper worked on, she now worked on massaging the bottom of Inanna's foot.

Inanna Harth

 

[Inanna Harth]

Onrai

Inanna listened to Vanessa speak, but it was a long while before she gave a reply. Mostly because her breath caught at the revelation that Vanessa had not only been involved with the Emperor, of all people, but that she had known him before he was famous, so to speak. Vanessa and Carnifex. What a pairing that must have been.

Far more alarming was the unspoken implication in her comparison. Was Vanessa suggesting that Adrian might one day be as powerful as the Emperor? Perhaps even take Carnifex’s place?...

“I think you misunderstand my feelings on the matter,” she clarified. “What I want in a man has very little to do with whatever lust I feel for him in the moment. I can’t help being attracted to him, sure, but it’s more complicated than that. If he can’t give me what I’m after—all that I’m after—I might as well not bother.”

But if she didn’t intend to act on her passions, what was he going to be to her? He was already her employer. They had made a deal that each had vowed to uphold. So far so good. Was that all? Could she one day be his equal? A friend and confidant, even?

“If you help me stop him, I will do anything, Adrian. Anything.”

Her words in the silver tower haunted her still. She had a feeling it wouldn’t be the last time she spoke that way to him.

 

[Onrai]

Vanessa continued to read into Inanna's thoughts. "Anything is possible, but that particular scenario is... unlikely." She said, concluding work on Inanna's left leg and moving over to her right. "Tell me then, what exactly are you looking for in a man? Someone you're passionately in love with?" She smirked - Inanna was the easiest person in the galaxy to read the mind shift of. She breathed softly, deliberately. "You assisted in the escape of the changeling who stole the data from Adrian." She said. "That would be like me working with the New Imperials and still attempting to have a bond with the Emperor." She replied. "Such a union is... unlikely to be sustainable. Unlikely unless you were to somehow gain leverage on him."

She continued to work on the thigh, moving up and down from it to the calf. "Ingrid is the key to his debaucheries, and the solution to worming somehow into his heart. Unless, of course, there is someone else who can appeal to you."

Inanna Harth

 

[Inanna Harth]

Onrai

"Tell me then, what exactly are you looking for in a man? Someone you're passionately in love with?"

“No,” Inanna said softly. “He would just have to be mine alone. We would belong to one another for as long as we were together.” She raised her chin. “I don’t do ‘open relationships’.”

But Adrian was a specter that simply refused to go away. She often wished she could forget about him. Before he came along, she had been trying to seduce Hal Yomin. Though it was probably a good thing she hadn’t gotten very far with that endeavor—he was technically her employee, which made it a mixing of business and pleasure (never a good idea in her book), and it was hard work just trying to get him to loosen up and be willing to socialize, let alone have fun.

"You assisted in the escape of the changeling who stole the data from Adrian. That would be like me working with the New Imperials and still attempting to have a bond with the Emperor. Such a union is... unlikely to be sustainable. Unlikely unless you were to somehow gain leverage on him."

“Yes,” she murmured. If there was anything that truly frightened her, it was the thought that Adrian might be working against her even now. Arrius Messala was not only a fellow Sith, he was a fellow scientist—he had every reason to side with him rather than help her. And now that he knew they were enemies, he could just as easily use the situation to his advantage.

"Ingrid is the key to his debaucheries, and the solution to worming somehow into his heart. Unless, of course, there is someone else who can appeal to you."

“Ingrid?” Inanna shrugged. “I can’t see what she would want with me. How would we even end up meeting?”

Unless, of course, Vanessa was suggesting something else entirely…

It was hard to read Adrian. She wasn’t sure if he genuinely loved Ingrid, or if she had simply impressed him. He might just see her as highly lethal arm candy, for all she knew. The redhead was beautiful and terrible as the dawn, powerful enough to act as his defender in battle, devoted to him yet still an independent and free agent… and yet, wasn’t she already married to someone else? Some Vahla chieftain, if Inanna remembered correctly. There had to be a story there.

Inanna finally threw her hands in the air. “I’d rather not think about this right now. Why don’t you tell me more about the Dark Trooper I’m going to have to fight?”

 

[Onrai]

Vanessa nodded. “Understandable. I probably shouldn’t mention Avicus DuSang then. I wondered what happened to him...” Avicus she hadn’t seen in decades - perhaps he was scheming, or perhaps he was already dead.

She sensed the apprehension and worry seeping from Inanna’s mind and gently patted the back of her head. “Listen to me, Inanna. You are my apprentice. If for any reason Adrian, or Messala, or any other Sith have something sort of an issue, they will need to come through me. Any attempt to do something to you will lead to a conflict with me, and I assure you: I have more than enough resources to defeat them in an internal war.” Reassuring Inanna of her safety was paramount - if she could not provide such, how could Inanna have faith in her for anything?

Vanessa sighed. “I can organize such a meeting. If you really do want to get into Adrian’s heart, you have to find the one who has him by the balls. That would be Ingrid.” She said, nodding. “As for the Dark Trooper - imagine a hulking behemoth with Phrik armor plates, an energy shield, and a relentless drive to kill whatever it has been ordered to kill. That is a Dark Trooper. You had best get creative because a lightwhip isn’t going to so much as scratch it. The Force will be your ally on this.”

Inanna Harth

 

[Inanna Harth]

Onrai

Inanna winced as Vanessa reassured her that she was safe and protected now. Her master knew everything she was thinking, and Inanna still hadn't gotten used to it yet. "I was only speculating," she said. Her thoughts on the matter were becoming unnecessarily paranoid, though.

But now that she considered it, perhaps meeting with Ingrid could have some use after all - though not for the reasons Vanessa might have presumed. Inanna smirked however, and played up her acceptance of the suggestion. "If you can arrange a meeting, I think I would like to get to know Ingrid. Perhaps she could help me."

No lightwhip. The Force would be her ally. "What am I supposed to do, use the Force to throw stuff at the Trooper? Why test me on this now, when I haven't even learned anything about the Force from you yet?"

 

[Onrai]

“You’re so vulnerable.” She said. “It’s quite precious. I have never had an apprentice who was so open as you are. But yes, you are safe with me and I will cause all sorts of hell to whoever causes you harm.” She said, reiterating her protective nature of those she cared about.

Vanessa knew her thoughts, but felt it fair to let her believe that her own rationale for such a meeting was shrouded. “I’ll be sure to reach out to Ingrid L'lerim and see if we can gather such a meeting. It should be a fun experience.” Done with her legs, she slid them back under the sheet before moving up and massaging Inanna’s right arm.

“You’ll figure it out.” She said. “You have the ability to be immensely powerful when the situation is do or die, as I have already seen. And unlike myself, there is no way for it to absorb the Force energy. Just remember, it is immune to energy weapons. Build your plan of attack around that.”

Inanna Harth

 

[Inanna Harth]

Onrai

This was the Sith way. Throw the acolytes into the pit and let the winner take all. Succeed or die.

Inanna had tried to learn the opposite way, with plenty of cushy support and extra chances from the Jedi. It hadn’t worked. Instead of growing stronger, her weaknesses became graver, holding her back from greatness.

After what had happened in the training room yesterday, Inanna was fully convinced that the Jedi style of teaching wasn’t what she needed. She’d had her suspicions for a while, but this was a confirmation. The breaking… had been unpleasant, but perhaps it was necessary. She’d prefer to think that, anyway.

She stopped talking altogether, letting Vanessa finish her work in silence. Perhaps her master spoke to her, but she stayed quiet, merely listening. When the massage was finished, Inanna sat up and replaced her clothing.

“I suppose I should get it over with, then.”

 

[Onrai]

Vanessa would finish working on Inanna's other arm, and once she was done, would let the apprentice get up. "You've been broken and have rebuilt yourself. You'll be fine. I have faith in you." The two would soon return to the training room, where Vanessa would give her a lightwhip and leave the room. Soon the panels within the room would boot up again, simply illuminating this time, as a Dark Trooper dropped from a hole in the ceiling. It immediately grabbed its heavy repeating blaster and began to spool up and open fire.

"Remember, you have the Force." She said through the loudspeaker.

Inanna Harth

 

[Inanna Harth]

Onrai

The Dark Trooper was a hulking mechanical monstrosity clad in black phrik armor. It stomped across the training room floor toward her, already firing.

Though Vanessa had warned her that the lightwhip wouldn’t help her, she had given Inanna one anyway. Inanna’s fingers closed around the hilt and she tried to knock the Trooper’s blaster from its hands with the Force, moving out of the way of the blaster fire as she did.

The Trooper clung to the heavy repeating blaster and kept firing. She kept moving, evading fire, but just barely, and tried to hit it with a Force push. Its boots were magnetized to the floor—it didn’t move an inch.

There had to be something she could do. Come on, think!

Putting the lightwhip away, she continued to zigzag around the room, darting away from the Trooper. It was a droid, wasn’t it? Metal and circuitry. Surely there had to be Force powers which were effective against machinery… like lightning. A Dark Side power.

Inanna held out her hand, willing for sparks to fly. Thin tendrils of violet-white energy arced around her fingers, but it never struck the Trooper. The droid fired at her and she sustained a couple of hits before she managed to dive behind cover.

Furious and in pain, Inanna forced herself to stand up and try again. This time lightning danced across her fingertips, gathering together, then blasted forward. It hit the Dark Trooper like the lightwhip, causing its energy shield to flare up. Inanna kept at it, stretching out her other arm as she focused on wearing down the Trooper’s defenses. The shield sputtered and died, only for the de-ionizer to kick in, harmlessly deflecting the lightning and giving the shield a chance to power up again.

Inanna sank back down into cover, exhausted. Her hands were smoking, and the Trooper was still coming. Rolling over, she crawled to the other end of the barrier she was hiding behind, trying to stay out of sight for just a little while longer…

The Trooper lurched forward. Yes, Inanna had the Force. But what could she do with it? It was all so difficult...

Clutching her wounds, she closed her eyes and pictured the Trooper in the Force. It was a machine made of metal parts and wires and energy cells. She envisioned the minutiae of the droid, its inner workings, and imagined taking it all apart, piece by piece, and scattering them…

All sound abruptly stopped. Save for her own pounding heart and labored breaths, Inanna heard nothing. No blaster fire, no thundering boots, no servos whining or machinery humming. It was quiet.

Then, a tremendous crash as the separated pieces of the Trooper fell to the ground. Her concentration broken, they were no longer telekinetically held up in the air. As Inanna opened her eyes and turned to stare at the pile of dissembled technology, she blanched. She hoped Vanessa had insurance on the damned thing.

 

[Onrai]

Vanessa smiled, her illusory form manifesting next to Inanna as she indicated her pride in her apprentice. "You... You shattered it. That's incredibly impressive, Inanna. I have honestly never seen an apprentice who was so capable, so able to improvise a solution with the power of the Force. I know people probably haven't said this to you much, but..." She paused, kneeling next to Inanna. "I'm proud of you, Inanna."

The illusion would disappear as the door would open, the training room once more accessed by the real Vanessa herself. She reached out with the Force to help her apprentice get to her feet. "Three trials - I'd say that's enough to firmly vet you according to your own weaknesses." Once Inanna was over by the door, she would elaborate as to what was next. "Now, we go through the process of refining your training in the Force. Telekinetic powers, the ability to choke, to grab, to crush, to throw... As well as powers such as the use of Force Lightning. Once we do that... I feel you're ready to begin studies as to the true darkness of the Sith."

Inanna Harth

 

[Inanna Harth]

Onrai

Inanna was still out of breath, her pulse pounding in her ears. She clutched at her wounded side as Vanessa helped her up and guided her out of the training room.

She still wasn’t sure how she had manifested any of these powers. It had simply come to her out of the blue. But now Vanessa was going to teach her more of them… inducting her into the mysteries of the Dark Side…

“I—I need some time to myself after all this,” she blurted. “I need to think.”

Without waiting for her master to dismiss her, she hobbled away to the lift, pressing the button to reach the floor where her quarters were located.

She found Ayreon waiting for her inside the bedroom. The HRD was in standby mode, but he “woke up” as soon as the door opened. “Hello, Inanna,” he greeted. Then, seeing her clutching her side, he quickly stepped forward. “You are injured. You should sit down.”

“I know, I know.” Inanna sank down onto the bed and pulled her hand away. It was sticky with black blood. “There any bacta strips in this joint?”

“The wounds are not severe,” Ayreon said, tilting his head as he examined her. “Your physiology should allow you to heal fairly quickly without much treatment necessary.” He reached inside his jacket and pulled out a packet of bacta pads, which he carefully applied to the burns. “What happened?”

“Training happened. I had to fight a Dark Trooper.” She sighed. “I disassembled it with the Force. But don’t worry, I’ll never do that to you.”

If Ayreon had any reaction to that, it didn’t show on his face. “It sounds like your training is going well enough, though I’m having trouble understanding Ms. Vantai’s methods.”

“All that matters is that I survive them,” Inanna replied, letting the bacta soothe her. Her compact mirror was once again in her hand, the regeneration crystals warm against her fingertips. She looked up at Ayreon suddenly, her gaze sharp. “I’m going to ask you to do something for me.”

He blinked, awaiting her orders.

“Take the ship and leave me here.”

His lips parted, a very slight, momentary microexpression. “Are you sure that’s wise?”

Snorting softly, she shook her head. “It’s very unwise. But I have an assignment for you to do while I’m here…”

//exit thread