Corrupt a wish

[Darth Armyss]

You suffocate from the swamp gasses

I wish for a castle.

 

[Ravi Savak]

Granted. The castle is inhabitated by dozens of the monster from The Grudge.

I wish for this wish to not exsist.

 

[Darth Armyss]

You erase yourself from existence via logical paradox.

I wish for a time machine.

 

[Ravi Savak]

You get one. But it's just a cardboard box that says "TIME MACHINE" on it, written in crayon.

I wish for a million tax-free working dollars

 

[Darth Armyss]

You get a million, tax-free, working, Zimbabwean dollars.


I wish for a million, tax-free, working, US dollars.

 

[Abric Korne]

Granted....but the money is covered in anthrax.

I wish to be President of Zimbabwe!

 

[Darth Armyss]

Wish granted. You are president for all of 12 seconds before an assassin shoots and kills you, your reign being the record setter for shortest time served as a head of state in history, beating the previous record of 45 minutes.

I wish to break a world record.

 

[Abric Korne]

Granted. You break the world record for the largest tumor removed. Previously the largest tumor was 24 kilos, or 56 pounds, since you're really going to shatter this record it has to weigh at least 30 kilos. Your body is shattered in the process.

I wish to be an International Arms Dealer who escapes authorities and assassins.

 

[Darth Armyss]

You escape authorities and assassins, only to die when your getaway car gets T-boned by a drunk driver.

I wish to have real force powers irl.

 

[Atlas Kane]

You have the Force, but no idea how to use it and you end up not even noticing you have it.

I wish I had a million-billion-quadrillion-zillion dollars.

 

[Ravi Savak]

You have all those dollars. In monopoly money.

I wish to be omnipotent.

 

[Jy'aad Evliar]

Your body disintegrates from the sheer amount of power.

I wish to have a TARDIS.

 

[Mrrew]

You have a TARDIS, but you don't have the key.

I wish I was a living timelord that wasn't trapped, hunted by daleks- or anything else, and that wasn't driven insane by the time vortex.

 

[Jy'aad Evliar]

Granted, but you are ancient, and out of regenerations.

I wish my brother's computer wasn't screwed up.

 

[Mrrew]

It isin't, now. *five seconds later* Now it is.

I wish to have a legion of Daleks completely loyal to me that are immune to all damage, and only obey my commands.

 

[Jy'aad Evliar]

You go mute, and thus cannot verbally command your Daleks.

I wish people would stop complaining about my writing in cursive.

 

[Mrrew]

They do. They now complain about your breath.

I wish for a working Nubian yaught in real life, with no damaged or malfuncitoning parts, and a how-to manual to drive it. As well as unlimited fuel, and materials for repair.

 

[Jy'aad Evliar]

You have one... And then you and your yacht disappear into the Bermuda Triangle.

I wish I could meet my character in real life.

 

[Gar'Hal Velasura]

You do, and then he hates you.

I wish for an end to war!

 

[Aszräl]

Granted, all life is decimated.

I wish life was restored.