Faegard
Little Rabbit
W A L T Z
T A G: Agravain
That was one of the things I'd always admired about Agravain.
Would it get easier? Neither of us could know for sure, but whether it was for both our sakes or mine alone, he said that it would, that it could. He had always served as a beacon of hope. He wouldn't lie or sugar-coat, but he saw the light in almost every dark place in which I'd found myself...
almost.
I swallowed, pulling myself away from his shoulder with as much nonchalance as I could. Much as I tried to fight it, a shiver wracked my shoulders, one I endeavoured to hide beneath a casual toss of my hair. His question had settled upon my soul like a drop of honey on an ants nest. I felt the distinct curdling and writhing as my spirit fought to devour it - to make it disappear. Did Agravain deserve it? No, and on that fact alone, I could say that I did, by being the one who brought him to that place.
But even if I hadn't - even if I could somehow wipe that black mark off my record, did I deserve to be cursed? Before I'd even followed that damn map?
My mind travelled to my attempts to infiltrate Dathomir, being captured and imprisoned by the Sith, escaping... all those bodies that my eventual escape partner had left, and how I'd stood by and done nothing as he'd felled humans and aliens alike.
"I guess not." I lied, "I mean, no. But it's a redundant train of thought anyway."
Redundant or not, I knew it was one that would consume me whenever I lay down to rest, as it had from the moment I'd turned, and would until whenever this existence would end. But that was bleak. This was all too bleak, and if I became too consumed by it I worried that Agravain would ask me for my thoughts. So instead, I made a point to scoop my hair over one shoulder, a simple physical gesture that helped to banish the thoughts like bats from an attic.
"Perhaps there is yet fun to be had. What secrets might this garden hold, do you suppose?"
Would it get easier? Neither of us could know for sure, but whether it was for both our sakes or mine alone, he said that it would, that it could. He had always served as a beacon of hope. He wouldn't lie or sugar-coat, but he saw the light in almost every dark place in which I'd found myself...
almost.
I swallowed, pulling myself away from his shoulder with as much nonchalance as I could. Much as I tried to fight it, a shiver wracked my shoulders, one I endeavoured to hide beneath a casual toss of my hair. His question had settled upon my soul like a drop of honey on an ants nest. I felt the distinct curdling and writhing as my spirit fought to devour it - to make it disappear. Did Agravain deserve it? No, and on that fact alone, I could say that I did, by being the one who brought him to that place.
But even if I hadn't - even if I could somehow wipe that black mark off my record, did I deserve to be cursed? Before I'd even followed that damn map?
My mind travelled to my attempts to infiltrate Dathomir, being captured and imprisoned by the Sith, escaping... all those bodies that my eventual escape partner had left, and how I'd stood by and done nothing as he'd felled humans and aliens alike.
"I guess not." I lied, "I mean, no. But it's a redundant train of thought anyway."
Redundant or not, I knew it was one that would consume me whenever I lay down to rest, as it had from the moment I'd turned, and would until whenever this existence would end. But that was bleak. This was all too bleak, and if I became too consumed by it I worried that Agravain would ask me for my thoughts. So instead, I made a point to scoop my hair over one shoulder, a simple physical gesture that helped to banish the thoughts like bats from an attic.
"Perhaps there is yet fun to be had. What secrets might this garden hold, do you suppose?"