Private "Even Bad Men Love Their Mother's" [Kay Larr].

[Caedyn Arenais]

His fathers belongings were hidden there, within the Elder's Sanctuary on Commenor...-Whatever his Mom had left there, must have been vital for something, to leave them behind upon their home-world; to not take these last reminders of her husband, the Children's father, with her. Whatever Veiere had asked [member="Kay Larr"] to look after, Caedyn could only assume it had something to do with the Force Sensitive side of their family. "These belongings of Dad's...They're to do with the Jedi Order?" He asked, expectantly. It seemed pretty obvious, as his Mom had always hidden her Force Sensitivity and as such, seemed a likely explanation for leaving them behind.

The tunnels all sounded very intricate, though his Mom's explanation would be recorded via the Holo-emitter per Caedyn's activation and so he shouldn't have any trouble once there. For all other risks, the Force would be his guide, he could only hope. "Has Loreena been there before?" He asked curiously, wondering if perhaps his sister had kept this as one of her own hiding spots as well. She could be sneaky like that. "-And do you think Dad will want these things back?" he asked further, wondering what he should do with the items once they were in his possession.

 

[Kay-Larr]

Kay gave [member="Caedyn Arenais"] a little nod as he asked about his Father's belongings. "Some if them are, yes..." Not the crown, of course. That was part of his old life. For a time she had hidden her wedding rings there too, after their political separation. Now she had wished that she had kept them there, for now they were gone. Either they were destroyed or thrown away by [member="Darth Tacitus"] , she wasn't sure. All that she knew was that they were taken from her during her capture.

It was another thing to feel guilty about.

"I don't think that Lori's been there. None of you were meant to know, but circumstances change."

As for Veiere wanting his things back, Kay shrugged her shoulders a little. "I don't know. You could always ask him. He may want a couple of things. But others he may just want them left behind." It was hard for her to predict what he would want. Kay had broken her own heart and she felt as though some of the pieces were missing too.

After a moment she excused herself and headed over to the counter. "I need some tea. Do you want anything?" As always, the tea was her crutch. Going away to prepare it at least helped to take her away from a situation where she felt uncomfortable.

 

[Caedyn Arenais]

"Sure, I'll try some tea?" Caedyn replied with a little uncertainty in his voice, he'd never really tried tea or stimcaf but his parents had always drunk the stuff so while the offer was there, he figured why not try it. Who knows, it might be the last opportunity he had to share a hot brew with his Mom; "Surprise me" he added with a little smile, not knowing what types of tea were best, or even recommended.

The notion of Jedi artifacts of his fathers hidden back on Commenor certainly intrigued him, though he wasn't going to question [member="Kay Larr"] further on the subject as she obviously didn't feel comfortable discussing these things in detail. Pocketing his holo-emitter, he moved to follow alongside her as she sought to prepare their drinks. "Do you know what Lori's been up to lately?" He asked, changing the subject to something more familiar to them both, "I haven't seen her in quite a long time now, probably not since the fighting between the United Clans and the Silver Jedi..." he admitted, an affair of which none of their family had been fond of, nor benefited from.

 

[Kay-Larr]

Kay nodded a little and wandered behind the counter for her usual go-to tea; Sapir. It was always warm, soothing and comforting. Right now it was the only comfort she every really got, but she was used to that by now.

The water was already hot, so she needed merely to crumple the leaves into the cups. As [member="Caedyn Arenais"] asked about Lori, Kay shook her head a little. "No, I don't really know for certain. I hadn't seen her since the remnants of the First Order attacked Zakuul. That was before I was pulled away to Mando space to look aft--I mean, to be protected from Carnifex." A lot of good that did, though. Kay added that last part in as she almost divulged a secret for her true purpose there; something that she couldn't let Veiere or the Jedi know about, especially during war.

"Last I heard was that she was running jobs on her ship. Hopefully she's staying out of trouble." But knowing Lori, was that really possible?

Kay didn't stir the tea at all. She just picked up one of the cups and handed it to Caedyn. "You can sweeten it up if you'd like." Fortunately Sapir tea wasn't a bitter tea. She always found it to be pleasant.

 

[Caedyn Arenais]

Caedyn frowned as his Mother seemed to correct herself; 'look after what?' he wanted to ask. Hiding from the Sith within Mandalorian Space had made no sense to him back then and now more than ever he was sure there were other reasons or motivations behind her having been there during the fighting, but he also respected his Mom's privacy enough to not go delving into subjects that she seemingly didn't wish for him to know.

Taking his Sapir Tea, Caedyn offered something of a small smile, though all the same appreciative and genuine. "Thanks Mom" he said softly, his mind roaming for a moment upon the colorful past their family shared. To be honest, if anyone deserved a break away from the stress and pressures of this Galaxy, it was [member="Kay Larr"] as far as Caedyn felt. His Mom had been a beacon of light in a galaxy of broken politics for so long, as long as he could remember since the start of his lifetime on Commenor. Sure, she'd made some mistakes since they had left their former home-world, but she was Commenori after all. None of them were perfect...

"I should probably try and track her down, I guess" Caedyn spoke up again after a moment, "I can't remember the last time we were together, not unless you count Dad forcing us to sit on-board the Judiciary while telling us how there was a War on the horizon". It wasn't the greatest bonding time for the family, to put it extremely lightly.

"You know...-She might be interested in a visit back to Commenor with me?" He said with a questioning tone, as if asking his Mom's permission to bring his Sister along with him on this artifact hunt she was sending him on.

 

[Kay-Larr]

Kay gave [member="Caedyn Arenais"] a small smile, placing her hand on his cheek as a doting mother would while she studied his eyes. She saw the questioning in them, yet he seemed to keep them to himself. For the moment she was thankful for that.

"You're welcome." Slipping her hand off of him, she picked up her own cup of tea and cradled it in both of her hands. An eyebrow rose while he spoke of being forced to sit on the Judiciary. "Your Dad did that? I can only imagine how it made you all feel..." She sipped her tea, allowing herself to be comforted by it. "...I wish that I could've been there before the war started. If I could've helped to prevent it, then I would've." Or at least she'd of tried. But instead she was busy on the other side of the Galaxy trying to protect Zakuul from terrorist attacks by remnants of the First Order.

To his question of Lori going to Commenor with him, Kay understood what he had meant. She took but a second to think about it before nodding. "Alright. I'm sure that she'd love to join you. In fact, knowing Lori, if you were to tell her about it she'd insist on going with you. I know how the two of you used to love exploring caves." It sparked a memory of Kay catching the two of them in the tunnels beneath their Estate. They weren't supposed to be there, yet there they were. And that was where she first saw them using their Force abilities.

 

[Caedyn Arenais]

"I guess I saw it coming, eventually" Caedyn replied on the subject of the Judiciary and the news that had come that day; "Being with Asaraa on Kashyyyk so often, you tend to pick up on the gossip, even around other Jedi" he elaborated. Even though the Order had it's secrets and it's chain of command, Jedi were at the end of the day still only sentient and one of the greatest pass-times of a Jedi Student seemed to be talking about the news that they shouldn't be aware of, things only the upper hierarchy like the Jedi Knights of the Temple ought to know. With so many people in one location, it was often difficult to keep things a secret for long.

Lifting his cup to his lips, Caedyn quietened himself in order to take a sip. It tasted a little funny to him, not bitter but the herbal after-taste definitely wasn't something he was used to, even despite being the son of [member="Kay Larr"], famous for her love of such drinks. Taking the moment to consider his response in regards to his Mom's regrets for the past, Caedyn shook his head softly and lowered the cup in order to speak further "Even if you and Dad were there on Kashyyyk working together, you're still only two people and I heard the Mandalorian's and the Jedi haven't really gotten a long...-Ever. From what Asaraa explained to me, it wasn't something two people could have put a stop to...Not with so many worlds and people being so resentful of each other" The United Clans of Mandalore had their ways, the Silver Jedi had their own. Regardless of who was wrong and who was right (both justified in their own eyes), there was apparently too much history to overlook a possible future of peace...

"I'm just glad it's not still going on..." he added, as if trying to bring the conversation back into a positive light; "It'll be good to see Lori again and not have to worry about what's going on around us like we did back then. It wasn't easy seeing you and Dad on opposite sides like that, but I'm glad that you're both okay after everything that's happened. If we'd lost one or both of you to the fighting...-Well, after the way I spoke to you on the Outer-Heaven, I'd never be able to forgive myself".

 

[Kay-Larr]

Kay lightly shrugged her shoulders. "You could be right...." Maybe she couldn't of helped to stop it. But she had what the others didn't, Yasha's ear. Her niece listened to her, but by the time that Kay was called into Mando space it was too late. Both for Yasha and to prevent the war. She felt guilty for both accounts. Her niece was dying and there was little that she could do but hold her and watch over her like her own mother would. And she couldn't ask for help from anyone.

She sipped her tea as [member="Caedyn Arenais"] did, needing the comfort that the drink gave her. "I'm glad that it's over too. And your Dad and I weren't entirely on opposite sides. I wasn't involved in the fighting. I stayed out of it. We both wanted the war to end, both had the same goals. So we were never enemies. I don't think that we ever could be. We care too much for eachother."

Kay heard a laughter then, and turned to look at it's source.

Mayhem was there sitting cross-legged on one of the tables. "Cared so much for him that you got divorced? Oh Kay-Kay, you're telling fibs."

She narrowed her eyes slightly and then turned back to her son. "We won't be around forever, Caedyn. All that we can do is hope to part on good terms every time. We are family and forever will be, even if we are mad at eachother for whatever reason. We are bonded by blood and...by the Force." Kay hardly ever talked about the Force these days. It just wasn't a part of her day to day. She was shut off from the Galaxy for the most part and that was probably a good thing.

 

[Caedyn Arenais]

Veiere had explained to Loreena and Caedyn, his views on the war. Although he had not liked any of it, he had also felt that action needed to be taken in order to loudly announce to the rest of the Galaxy that the Jedi weren't going to sit idle while others wreck havoc upon unsuspecting and peaceful societies. In his fathers eyes, the Mandalorian's had been guilty. His Mom, [member="Kay Larr"] had disagreed with this view from what Caedyn understood, and fortunately he was able to keep clear of the voicing of said differences.

"A lot of people liked to talk behind Dad's back during those times. Members of the Order that had heard of his connection to you, and to Yasha" Caedyn spoke his thoughts on a whim, "No one liked the idea of someone so high up being so close to the Mandalorian's. They didn't agree with the risks but Dad took them anyway. I know he was asked to arrest you if you two ever found each other in the fighting. I guess he refused, because the Silver Jedi never spoke against you, and the Assembly seemed to trust him".

Since leaving Commenor, Caedyn had fought droids and criminal types, Mandalorian's and Sith Acolytes. His growing experience and view on fighting hadn't changed in the least bit, the belief that it ought to be avoided where possible, but also that justice was an important part of keeping the peace in the Galaxy. The two often being a fine line to walk and to somebody, somewhere, Caedyn's perspective of what was right, would be wrong in their eyes. It was unfortunately the mere nature of a Galaxy filled with so many vastly numbered and different beings.

"Both of the Order's I've been raised in teach that death isn't all that's left for us, that we will find peace within the Force when we transcend" Caedyn added after a further moment. "I don't want to go talking about losing you guys at all, but the thought gives me some hope...-All this has to be for something, right?".

 

[Kay-Larr]

Kay lowered her head and slumped her shoulders as [member="Caedyn Arenais"] spoke about the Silvers not liking Veiere's connection to herself and through that with the Mandalorians. She figured as much. To hear that they had called for her arrest should she be seen as involved, that didn't really surprise her either. Once Veiere had found her on a small island during an attack. It was coincidence more than anything else. Yet when she didn't make a single move to a weapon or to attack, he let her escape in a shuttle with other civilians. No one knew about her being there...

"That's why I divorced him; your Dad. I didn't want to sour his reputation any further. Nor jeopardize it. Even though he helped to clear my name with the Assembly, I'm not so sure that people trust it. If they did, then they wouldn't of told him to arrest me if he saw me during battle."

It was all politics. In their lives everything would be. There just was no escape from it for either of them. At least Caedyn and Lori weren't involved in such things themselves.

Kay sipped her tea while he spoke of potential peace after death giving him hope, as well as everything having a purpose. She didn't really agree with that. Not after everything she had been out through time and time again. There were times when she longed for death to take her, especially during torture, but it never came. It was as though she was only alive to suffer.

"I hope so...Though what that something is, I don't know. Maybe your Dad knows?"

 

[Caedyn Arenais]

"It wasn't the Silver Assembly, it was the Confederacy that suggested he might be forced to confront you" Caedyn elaborated, "Dad told Lori and I when he told us about the fighting about to start. Apparently he and other members of the Assembly were invited to meet with the leaders of the Confederacy, the Outer Rim Coalition leaders and the Galactic Empire. He said the Assembly supported him in what he felt was best, not what others might have wanted" though he was leaving Silver Space to seek out the Jedi Path in the Outer Rim, Caedyn didn't want his Mom thinking the Silvers were resentful towards her or his Dad. There were plenty of good people in the Order on Kashyyyk, good intentions regardless of the differences they might have had with the Mandalorians.

"Dad and I never really trained much together" He admitted, more his fault than his fathers and he knew it; "After Commenor and what happened on Deneba, I guess I lost confidence in him" he added equally as honest. "I've always tried to make my own way in life. Don't get me wrong, I love what you and Dad built for our family, but I want to make my way in the Galaxy in my own way, not on the back of his reputation or experiences as a Jedi Master".

House Arenais had a reputation as well as a vast income built upon numerous different financial and political endeavors since the start of his Mom's Presidency over Commenor. Even with Commenor having no longer been an active part of their life, there were still avenues bringing home the credits that meant Caedyn didn't have to work if he didn't care to. That just wasn't his way of doing things however, having been trained in both the Je'daii and Jedi Orders.

As an Individual however, he still had yet to really feel as though he had found his place in the Galaxy. [member="Asaraa Vaashe"] was one half of himself, but he had yet to know the other half.

[member="Kay Larr"]

 

[Kay-Larr]

"Well I'll certainly know who to avoid and who I can't trust, thank you." There were very little people that she knew that she could trust anyways, but now she knew for sure that there plenty more that she couldn't. Isolation seemed more and more the better option. The less chance that she had to run into those people, the better.

She nodded as she heard Caedyn explain how he felt about the fate and life he wanted. All that she could do was give him a small smile. "It was never intended that either you or Lori follow in our footsteps. That was why we took you both out of the Palace and raised you in the Estate instead. Then you each got to go to your own places of learning. The family fortune...I haven't touched a single credit since I got out of Purgatory. It's not mine to use. It's yours. So use it however you deem fit." That was the truth of it. Kay would rather starve than take anything from the Arenais fortune. It just didn't belong to her anymore. And her pride kept her from asking for it and for help from anyone. Even if it meant her doom. She knew what every bit of loss felt like. Now she just waited for those losses to repeat again. History had a way of doing that.

Caedyn Arenais

 

[Caedyn Arenais]

"I mean...-It sounds like you're trying to avoid everyone at the moment" Caedyn replied in response to his Mom's remark about knowing who to trust and who to avoid. As far as his Dad and the Silver Jedi were concerned, he didn't believe them to be bad people. The Order of Kashyyyk were doing all they could to try and make the Galaxy a better place, but there were also other parts of the Galaxy that didn't have Jedi, or anyone for that matter whom wished to improve the state of society these days and thus suffered because of it. The Outer Rim was one such place that struggled constantly with criminality and a sense of lawlessness. The Jedi Enclave on Svivren would be his way of trying to make up for that.

"So all the credits that you and Dad earned on Commenor...-That's all mine and Loreena's?" he asked a little in disbelief, their family name was a very rich one with enough credits that he and his Sister could probably go the rest of their lives without working a day, though that wasn't their style, it certainly made for a comfortable future without the stress of financial fallout.

"I'm glad to be a Jedi today" He added, feeling as though he needed to assure Kay-Larr that the path he was on wasn't a fault of their parenting at all. "I really loved my time with the Je'daii and Lief too, but I have no regrets...-If things hadn't gone as they have then I'd never have met Asaraa Vaashe or learned to use the Force as I have".

 

[Kay-Larr]

"I suppose that I am. But then again, I'm used to having only myself to rely on. There are far less lives impacted that way. Far less decision for me to make wrong." Why be resposible for anyone but herself? It wasn't as though anyone needed her to look after them. Nor would she be given the responsibility anyways. She didn't trust herself so why would anyone else?

At the mention of the Arenais fortune, Kay nodded her head. "I'm not so sure of whether or not your Dad does much with it or not. But it is your inheritance." Probably the best thing that either of them could get from her.

Kay sipped her tea, listening to him as he spoke of his love for his life's work so far. "Well that's good. I'm glad that you're doing so well and as I said earlier, I'm proud of you." It is every parent's dream that the children fair better than the parents. Though with her, both of her children had already done that.

"I shouldn't keep you any longer. No doubt you've got a lot to do. I hope that you find Lori. And let me know if you follow the map or not." Of course Kay wasn't sure of what would cause her more stress. To either have Veiere's things kept safe at the Elders sanctuary, or with her son. Either way, she had to trust that they'd be safe forever.

Caedyn Arenais

 

[Caedyn Arenais]

"Dad put a lot of credits into that space-station we last saw each other on, though House Arenais was a silent benefactor where as Locke and Key Mechanics were a much more public contributor, from what I've heard. Besides, that place is massive and it's bound to be bringing in a lot of creds now that it's been operational and self sufficient for so long" Caedyn imagined aloud, guessing more than he actually had knowledge over, yet their Family never seemed to struggle when it came to financial means. It was easy to assume that Veiere had his hands in more than a few strong profitable sources, given that he had done so much on Commenor alone with the founding the Commenor Security Intelligence Agency, the Outer Heaven Space Station, a number of organizations outside of Commenor, as well as his time with the Order of the Silver Jedi and the numerous contracts and associates he'd met and gained through their line of work.

As for his Mom however, it was difficult to imagine her being happy in her current place in life. Everything seemed so negative when she spoke, as though she were more of a burden than the blessing he and Lori had always believed their parents to be in their own lives. "I know everyone makes mistakes in life, but you don't really believe you're all that bad, do you?" he asked Kay-Larr , finding it difficult to see her in the same light that she seemed to perceive of herself.

The problem with having an eye for negativity was that when you went around in life expecting the worst of situations, that was often what you were destined to come about with. Without a sense of optimism and positivity, the Galaxy could feel utterly miserable. His Dad had learned this the hard way, as it had led to his fall to the Darkside and he'd been forced into a similar place that Kay seemed to be in now. Caedyn didn't believe this was all that there was left to his Mother's life however, that she could pull herself back into a good place in life if she were only to try and find the heart and courage to do so.

"You don't need to be the leader of millions of people, to be successful in life" Caedyn added, taking a page out of his own book; "I don't exactly have anyone looking to me for leadership. My Enclave on Svivren is manned by droids when I'm not there but I get pleasure from knowing that I'm doing good things for others...-Things like you and Dad told us about. Helping people, even if only in small ways".

 

[Kay-Larr]

"Well that's good to know that you three will be well taken care of. That gives me something less to worry about." Kay wasn't nearly in the same boat, but she was doing well enough in that she could live in one place comfortably. Traveling outside of that place was another story as she no longer had a ship and crew. So it was back to public transport like she used to do in her younger days.

To his question on whether or not she was all that bad, Kay shrugged her shoulders a little. "I'm supposed to be rotting away in jail. I'm supposed to of been executed. And now....now I'm unstable. So yes, I do believe that I'm all that bad." Others believed it to be so. Heck she nearly released a deadly plague on Anarris. That didn't exactly scream 'hero' in her books.

She sighed a little. Kay knew that she didn't need to rule a planet to be successful. Right now she was doing as much as she could trust herself with with her shoppe. "I sell tea. If people are thirsty and a little hungry, then I help them with that. It might not save the Galaxy or even lives, but it's something. Tea gives me comfort....sometimes that could be what others need too."

Caedyn Arenais

 

[Caedyn Arenais]

"Yeah well...-You won't be selling anything if you're shipped off to some crazy farm" Caedyn retorted, shaking his head as he struggled to find any reason to feel good about the decision Kay-Larr was weighing in her future.

"You can set up shop in any part of the Galaxy...-But not if you're wearing a straight jacket in some kind of a padded cell" he continued; "At one point you were supposed to be in jail, and then the Silver Jedi pardoned you. Dad got you off the hook as far as the Silver Jedi are concerned so that gives you a lot of room to move, still" the Silver Jedi resided over numerous planets and sectors, plenty enough room for someone like his Mom to hide and live out her life peacefully if she could keep herself from being attracted to the public spotlight again.

"If Dad could screw up bad enough to take the lives of other Jedi, only to be given a second chance and wind up being a member of the Silver Assembly somehow, then you of all people can find a reason and a means to live a peaceful life if it's something you want bad enough..." But truthfully, Caedyn believed she only wanted to punish herself. His Mom seemed to be at war with her own demons more so than anyone else blamed her for the past.

 

[Kay-Larr]

Kay stared at the table, her brows furrowed while her eyes brimmed with tears. Caedyn was trying hard to get through to her and she knew it. But she was stubborn. That was something that she knew too.

When she spoke her words were just above a whisper. "I'm just...scared Caedyn. I've always attracted the worst to me, especially when things are going well. I don't want to watch you all die again. I don't want to be the reason that others get killed out of spite. I don't need to endanger anyone. I've done enough of that already." In her mind it was better to just stay away from anywhere of importance. Out in the far north of the Galaxy, there was no large government looking out for whole systems. Everyone was just looking after themselves.

It was safer.

Caedyn Arenais

 

[Caedyn Arenais]

"Then stop living for everyone else, and start living for yourself" Caedyn replied quickly, the words coming as easily as they made sense in his mind. His Mom had spent a lifetime trying to do right by others, and yet never for herself.

"Loreena and I are fine, no one's touched us yet" He tried to reassure her, "I'm a Jedi and she's been trained by Dad enough to know how to look after herself. Not to mention by Jasper...Or Jester...Or whatever that Mandalorian's name was!". His Sister might not look all that strong but there was a fighter in her as good as any other Mandalorian her age. Not only did she weild the force but she had street smarts and hadn't been restricted by the moral and ideologies of the Jedi like her Father and Caedyn now followed and sought to conform to.

"As for Dad, I dunno how many Sith he's faced down and yet he's still standing..." It really did seem like a miracle, given all that Veiere had gone through, that he was still walking the Path among the living. "Politics may have been your life once, but now it's time to figure out what you want to do, what will make you happy. Stop trying to appease others..." It might have sounded borderline hypocritical coming from someone claiming to be a Jedi, but the advice he was giving was something his Mom needed to hear.

Kay-Larr

 

[Kay-Larr]

Kay was glad for the reassurances. It made her feel a little better about her family. That included Veiere, of course. They were still bonded by the Force, although she had stopped trying to reach out to him. She didn't want to be a burden. Their divorce was partially to free him from that.

"I've been in politics for so long that I've forgotten who I was before that. Perhaps some more time with my shoppe will help me to rediscover just what it is that I am meant to be, or what I am to do." Maybe that would work. Maybe she could return to the woods and stay there for a few days more and meditate; even reach out to the Force for guidance.

"Something will come up Caedyn...eventually." Kay was trying to be more optimistic for him and some part of her did feel it deep down inside. This was all going to work out.

....Somehow....

"Until then just keep in touch. And if you need your poor old mother to look after you for a time, I can do that."

Caedyn Arenais