It stirs the blood…

[Corvus Raaf]

He relaxed quickly which was good. Unlike the Sith who saw the Force as an instrument of their will, the Jedi saw it entirely the other way around. So she was pleased that he didn’t grab at the Force but rather allowed it to flow to him. Of course, she could sense it before he could – it would take time before his senses were finely attuned enough to be aware of these things.

But as he searched for the Force, his mind was wandering – which was entirely natural. She was aware that a datapad on the table next to her was rising. She took it gently, not wishing it to fall and break his concentration.

“Patience is the key. Continue to feel the Force, how it flows through you and surrounds you. Get used to the sensation for every time you wish to use an ability, you’ll need to access it. Tell me what you feel.”

[member="Vilair Revakin"]

 

[Vlad123]

"I feel...peace..."

A tingling sensation began to form as it spread, like a wave throughout his entire body. This is what it must have felt like to control the force with actual will, rather than a random burst of fluctuation. Peace itself seemed to possess him, was this truly the force? It felt so...right. His pugnacious attitude towards the force that used to reside seemed to be gone, replaced by a deep appreciation.

He himself felt like he was floating in some sort of empty void, unaware as more objects around him began to rise off the ground. He no longer felt like he was breathing, yet somehow his lungs were full of air like that one time at Tatooine. His memories quickly flashed back to that brutal day, when he was just a young boy. He had tripped over and knocked over a cart full of sand bricks and seconds later he was subject of a severe beating by one of the guards. Every whip at his back and fist that met his face, forcing Vilair to breath harder as the objects around him began to circle faster and faster around his meditative state.

Until that crushing blow against his chest left Vilair gasping for air. Unable to exhale or inhale, he began to choke.

Then suddenly as if brought out of his meditative state, Vilair let out a gasp as all the objects around him dropped to the ground. Breathing heavily, he got up and almost collapsed as he leaned against the hull of the ship catching his breath. That wasn't peace towards the end. That was something else. Something from the force, triggered a memory.

[member="Corvus Raaf"]

 

[Corvus Raaf]

Corvus was initially pleased with Vilair’s progress. The first connection was always the hardest and only with constant practice did it become automatic and fluent – like walking and breathing.

She sensed his peace and how deeply he was connecting to the Force. This all boded well for the future. But in an instant all that changed. He gasped for air and the objects he’d inadvertently lifted dropped to the floor. Given they were all replaceable, Corvus let them go.

Instead she followed Vilair as he stood and fell rather than leaned against the wall of the ship. Putting a hand on his shoulder, this time she sent a surge of tranquillity through his body via the Force. It should help calm him and help with his breathing.

“Tell me what happened, everything you can remember.” Was she worried? No, but this was not usual, and she needed to be sure nothing was amiss.

[member="Vilair Revakin"]

 

[Vlad123]

He slowly felt his emotions subside and his shaken state was beginning to fade away as she placed her hand on him, he could feel something change. By the looks of her expression this didn't seem like something she saw often, which meant it wasn't common.

"I... I remembered something from my younger years. S-something that I thought I buried in the past. From my days in Tatooine. It seemed to interrupt my focus."

That memory carried weight more heavier than he thought, and now that it was refreshed in his mind, no doubt it would trouble him. It was strange though to have been interrupted by something so malevolent, yet small like a memory. That must be why it was so important to focus...

He took a few more moments to himself as and noticed her hand was still on him. Looking up at Corvus and giving her a brief smile, Vilair wondered. Did she know anything about his past?

"I don't think it was anything you should be worried about. Must be because I am still just getting used to the force."
[member="Corvus Raaf"]

 

[Corvus Raaf]

Corvus listened to his explanation. The Force could never be simply explained and it didn’t work the same for everyone – but clearly this old memory had shaken him. How the Force was involved, she had no idea but unlike her usual response to allow things to simply find their own way of resurfacing, Corvus felt the need to press – albeit gently.

“Is there any obvious reason why this memory should resurface now? Was it connected to the Force in some way? Burying is never a positive thing – as you don’t know when it will resurface. Whatever it is, you will need to face the recollection and deal with it.”

“But now does not have to be the time. It is, however, the occasion where you should look to connect with the Force again. Remember, trust in the Force and remain serene. We are Jedi.”

[member="Vilair Revakin"]

 

[Vlad123]

Vilair gathered himself and collected his thoughts. He was embarrassed and slightly annoyed by his reaction to the force. It made him seem...weak. That was unacceptable. He didn't want to appear weak-minded in front of his master. Especially Corvus.

"The feeling that the force gave me. I haven't felt that in a long time. I felt...peace." Although it was followed by a repugnant feeling of some emotion that he couldn't quite understand.


"I have connected with the force. I felt serenity at it's finest. Which is what caused whatever it was that happened. Have you never seen something like that before?"

Maybe it was just a bad reaction to the force after all, and only a one time thing? Or was it something that he'd face again once more, and have to confront it to fight it off. Learning about the Jedi way was easy, but understanding it and experiencing it....was something else entirely.

[member="Corvus Raaf"]

 

[Corvus Raaf]

The exchange started well enough. Vilair experienced peace as a result of connecting to the Force which was both usual and welcome.

But why a feeling of serenity would cause such a reaction was not something she’d experienced before, not – if she was honest – understood.

“I haven’t come across that before. I can check the archives when we each Ossus. Tell me, what was the feeling that followed the serenity?”

There was no concern in her voice – and not because she was a good actress – but because she was in no way worried or bothered by what had happened.

[member="Vilair Revakin"]

 

[Vlad123]

He gave her a quizzical look before calmly answering.

"Despair."

Maybe he was different from the rest. What if the force within him was never supposed to be discovered? He asked himself questions, that he didn't have the answer to.

"I don't think it is anything to be worried about. Probably won't happen again. Once I start getting the hang of the Jedi way, I'm sure everything else will fall into place."

He looked at her and gave her a reassuring look. He could really do with a few hours bed rest and at whenever they arrived to their destination, a hot shower was definitely in order.

[member="Corvus Raaf"]

 

[Corvus Raaf]

This was not an answer she was expecting but it still didn't alarm her particularly. He must have had a traumatic life and perhaps the Force had shielded him historically?

Whatever, she could always consult the archives on Ossus, or speak to a healer, who may have an opinion.

"You look tired. This is a ship designed for missions. There's an ambassadorial set of rooms you can use. A bed and en-suite shower facilities. Or just grab something to eat, sleep and take it from there." She pointed at an adjacent room, "I'll be in the Meditation Chamber if you need me before we land."

[member="Vilair Revakin"]