Let This Circle Be Broken

[Lief]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0npUikfeMSE​

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Another day on Korriban.

How much of her life had been scouting out this world alongside [member='Jericho']? He had enjoyed walking through the Valley of the Dark Lords, roaming the rocky tombs in search of information, relics which had to be protected away from the reach of Darksiders who would use them for ill. It was the closest thing to a home she'd had, given that they had no permanent place.

All of that was gone, though. Her Papa had forsaken her during her hour of need, and now Asha was left to roam in solitude. As though retracing the steps of her youth might bring him back to her. A foolish hope, but one she could not risk to lose... For what else did she have?

One hand lifted as she stood within a small ridge, toying with the band of metal around her throat. Where once she had been able to resist the allure of the darkness that was ever present here, today the tombs felt suffocating. So much of the inherent light within her had been stripped away, whittled down until only pure willpower kept her from slipping any further. Held on by a need for balance, lest she forsake the code she had adhered to all her life.

"There is no ignorance... There is knowledge" she whispered, as she took her first step into the tomb of some Sith long since forgotten. "There is no fear, there is power..." How long had it been since she had uttered these words? They had been like a lullaby to her as a child, spoken to help quell any fears, to help soothe any upset, and Jericho had always spoken it with a light tone.

"I am the heart of the Force... I am the revealing fire of light... I am the mystery of darkness..."

Was she? Could she still be all of the things he wanted her to be? As broken as she was... As if on schedule, her thigh began to ache and she winced. Wounds long since mended, but still there within her mind. Still bearing an ugly scar.

"In balance with chaos, and harmony..."

Had anything so appropriately described her before? She was dancing on the edge of madness here, the darkness swelled all around her, and yet still that thin slither of hope remained within... Untouched even by the grim hand of Aellin.

"Immortal in the Force."

How many times had she begged for the end? Had she yelled at him to finish her? Had she waited for the sweet reprieve that should have come with each beating. Each step out of line had brought swift and direct justice to the young Hex child, more often than not resulting in tendrils at her back and unseen chains around her throat, sapping all of the life from her.

Why hadn't he followed through? Why hadn't he let the warm embrace of the Force carry her through into the next life? To one where she could stand immortal alongside so many others?

Her collar burned, but not so much as the sting of her eyes.

[member='Connor Harrison']

 

[Connor Harrison]

Connor stood in the shadows on the tomb entrance, still and gripping the crossguard in his hand as the girl walked through muttering to herself.

Exploring the ruins of the Sith was his territory, and while he wasn’t a tomb raider, he was at least interested to what secrets these places hid. After a successful campaign on Mustafar and First Order space, Connor was here to find what he could about the Sith Lords who built foundations they now stood on.

He didn’t expect another visitor, and one who looked like she shouldn’t be here.

His dark eyes followed her with his Force aura muted thanks to his cloak. Each step she took, she seemed more nervous and kept toying with her neck. What was she doing? She wasn’t an apprentice of the Force that was for sure.

So why waste time watching. She sounded more like a Jedi of the Light than anything.

He activated the buzz-saw like saber with a sharp snap-hiss of burning crimson energy and miniature exhaust vents that cast a sharp red glow around the whole tomb, illuminating him in a nightmarish way.

"Welcome to Hell, child."

He doubted anyone saw her come in, so nobody would miss her if she didn’t leave.

[member="Asha Hex"]

 

[Lief]

A long sigh left her.

How many times had she paced this tomb, waiting for her Papa to be finished? How many times had he walked this tomb? Between them the answer was probably higher than it was sensible to do. Each step she took, though distracted, seemed precise, there was no hesitation when she came to a junction and turned corners. She could have walked it blind.

"Ajunta Pall" she murmured, glancing up at the carvings in the sandstone which marred the uneven walls, "Forced to walk these halls for centuries in suspended animation... I feel your pain. Would that I had a Revan of my own to guide me to the Light."

Asha knew more about the Tombs which lay within the Valley than was probably healthy. More than most modern day Sith if she had to hazard a guess. Each trip had been a learning experience, a lesson, and Jericho did so love to fill her head with useless facts.

"Not so useless, are they, these facts you flooded my mind with, Papa? They provide hope; if one of the fiercest Sith Lords of all time can make it to the Light, then what is stopping a broken Lorrdian? I don't even want to tread under Ashla exclusively, I just want some of this darkness to subside. Is that too much to ask?"

It must be. You can't stand around and expect to be saved, Ash... You need to take control of your own destiny. You want to walk a path of Balance and Moderation, the way you were taught? Then do so. Nothing is standing in your way, not Papa, not Aellin... Nobody.

Her demeanor shifted for a moment. Her hand lowered from the collar around her throat, and she felt the darkness which had so intently tried to whittle her down fade. Maybe everything would be okay?

And then it happened. A voice through the darkness, accompanying the distinct snap-hiss of a lightsaber blade igniting. The cavernous tomb was met with a brilliant flash of red, which lingered on the corners of her vision.

She turned, peering through the glare into the eyes of one who walked exclusively through Bogan. His eyes were corrupt, his presence though muted sent shivers down her spine. For a moment confusion washed over her expression. "Pall?" No... It couldn't be, his spirit had been cast into the light by Revan.

Then who? Most Sith did not come into these parts anymore, Korriban was not exactly a bastion of darkness these days, given that it changed hands every other Galactic Year.

"Hell is what you make of it" she said, taking one very slight step back. No weapons, she still hadn't replaced her sabers. Perhaps that was a mistake on her part.

[member="Connor Harrison"]

 

[Connor Harrison]

Connor aimed the blade forward, the ports spitting violent energy and the main emission pointed to the girl.

"I’ve seen it all. Hell, and what lies beneath it."

He walked closer to her, edging the gap as the sound increased of his blade.

"Forgive me, but you sound like you’re reciting passages from the Light. Care to tell me what you’re doing here alone?"

The Ren stopped and held the blade out. He didn’t care for the relics of the past, or the tombs. But he cared for what the Jedi were doing to everything they touched- they destroyed and twisted it, and he wasn’t going to let it happen anymore.

And why did they always send helpless whelps. Did they not learn what happened the last time one crossed Connor? Would he have to send another message?

"Well?" His voice rose.

[member="Asha Hex"]

 

[Lief]

Asha stared at the self-righteous darksider who stood before her, swallowing back her fears. He claimed to have seen it all, yet she knew he had seen nothing compared to the horrors of the Durasteel Graveyard. Such things left their mark, she would know she bore several of them... Physical, mental... While this man had been broken, there was nothing quite so scarring. Just angst. Disgust.

And then he had the gall to call her an adherent of the Light.

"Do I look like a Jedi to you?" she inquired. She could taste it in his words, the prejudice he spoke. He knew nothing about her, he did not see the myriad of light and dark which perpetually swirled within her. So few in the Galaxy understood what it was to live such a life.

"I speak not the code of Light, but of Balance. Of an Order far more ancient and sacred than the one which carved this tomb. Your darkness does not scare me, nor does the burning light of Ashla."

He was stepping closer, crossguard fully ignited and aimed in her direction. By contrast Asha had nothing to defend herself with.

"I have as much right to walk this tomb as you, darksider." She would not insult him by calling him Sith, as he had hinted her to be a Jedi. There was something far too raw about him to make him so. She knew True Sith, she had looked upon one for two grim years. "I know these tombs greater than any alive, and you have the gall to question my presence here?"

A child she might have been, but Asha's determination, will to survive, to walk the path of the Je'daii had been firmly reignited. And the darksider before her had helped to kickstart it.

She felt the Force swirling within, aching to break free, but for now she held it deep inside. Controlled, harnessed, the way she had practiced during those torturous years.

[member="Connor Harrison"]

 

[Connor Harrison]

Looking down the blade, twisting it slightly at the girls’ torso, Connor took in her words. She wasn’t as clean-cut as expected. That peaked his interest.

The blade snapped out, the energy sucking back in and the hilt lowered. Darkness fell, with only the shadows cast from the outside light serving them both.

"Forgive me. The Code of Balance is not one I know well. So you are not Jedi? What are you?. Je’daii of old? A cultist? And what are you doing here?"

He fixed the hilt to his side and pulled the belt tight so it hugged his hip.

"You have spirit, child. Tell me who you serve."

[member="Asha Hex"]

 

[Lief]

Something she said garnered his attention, and the lightsaber was swiftly disignited. They were set amidst shadow, yet the corrupted sun of Korriban still made itself known on the far end of the walkway.

In darkness, light.

So it should always be. So it would always remain.

It seemed that she had a knack for talking her way out of situations. She had done the same with Aellin back on Thule, he was ready to kill her until she noted that he was injured and offered to help. Sure that had led her down a twisted path, but she was out the other end now... If he had butchered her where she stood, there would be no present.

He surprised her, this stranger, by naming off the Order she walked within... So few acknowledged its existence these days, or the fact that it had ever existed at all. In truth it was nothing these days, held together within the minds of a select few. Disorganized. But an Order did not need walls, it did not need Masters, it did not need a strong force. It just required an idea, within the hearts and minds of a few.

"I walk the Path of the Je'daii" she admitted, with a light nod of her head. How right it felt to state as much after so very long. "Though I serve nothing save the Force itself."

His other question was harder to answer, but she did not let herself hesitate too long.

"And I am here to retrace the same steps I have walked countless times, to gain clarity of my present situation. I believe I've succeeded in that task."

[member="Connor Harrison"]

 

[Connor Harrison]

In the confines of the outer tomb, warm light streaming in from outside, he paced slowly around the stonework looking at the girl. She was in her teens, and sported signs of…mental abuse? Physical?

"I thought the Je’daii were all but gone, nothing now more than a bunch of cultists running around. Is that you? Trying to bring back a dead Order, and on Korriban of all places?"

The collar around her neck. He pointed to it.

"You were a slave. Or are a slave. Right?"

He stopped and moved forward, looking at it, working out the mechanics of it and what it meant to the girl still wearing it.

[member="Asha Hex"]

 

[Lief]

"We're not cultists" she said, though her tone did not hint at defensiveness... She seemed glad that somebody was actually asking questions. Happy to answer them, to clarify. "And..." a very light and unoffensive laugh left her "We're most certainly not looking to settle here. We have a home already. No, this is just somewhere I used to come as a child with my Father. We'd explore the tombs, and he'd tell me all about the Sith buried here. He wasn't one, a Sith that is. He just valued the knowledge of the past."

She'd never really told anyone that. Sargon knew, at least sort of, he had found them here after all following Jyn's attack, but --

Her thoughts were cut short, when the man pointed in the direction of her throat. The collar which was usually covered by her shirt had been exposed with her earlier fidgeting, and he had taken note. All at once she felt her world tumbling down. She had said, aloud, openly, that she belonged to nothing, to nobody. Had he heard? Had she incurred the wrath of Aellin?

She felt the damn thing begin to burn. Psychological, like her aching thigh, but no less painful. She didn't let it show though. She couldn't risk it.

The collar itself was one continuous band of metal. There was no seam, no release clasp, no intricate details. There were no visible signs of wear or tear, as though she'd never even contemplated removing it. Aellin had trained her well in such regards.

"We are all slaves in some regard" she said, with a very slight tremor to her voice. Was this man one of Aellins? When he took a step forward she took a very slight one back, and though tears pricked on the very corner of her eyes she managed to keep her head held high.

"There is no fear, there is power" she whispered, barely loud enough for him to hear. There was a slight, uncomfortable creaking in her ears, and she felt her heart rate increase. A fist took hold of her chest, and it felt as though she couldn't swallow, couldn't breathe. But she stood there, staring at the Darksider all the same. Facing him the way she had been forced to face Aellin time and time again.

[member="Connor Harrison"]

 

[Connor Harrison]

Connor looked at the collar a little longer than he should, and when the girl stepped back, he then looked to her face with his own and noted hear fear and tears in the corner of her eyes. She muttered something. Did he evoke fear in this one, or was this fear of a past trying to be buried?

Kneeling down, he rested an arm on his knee.

"I’ll do you a deal."

He indicated to the collar.

"Take me to your Je’daii home, and I’ll remove that collar."

It was straight up. Information on this cult who strived for balance now active, and a way to decide if they needed to be wiped out or not, for the removal of her collar. She could fob him off as much as she wanted with talks about slaves and belonging, but nobody needed to wear a collar to know that.

Connor looked at her, rested on his knee and waited for her reply.

[member="Asha Hex"]

 

[Lief]

No retribution came. No smiting from the God she had quivered beneath. Once again Aellin's wrath was felt solely around her throat, with the burning of the collar. Like he was teasing her, taunting her... Waiting for the perfect moment to pounce.

The stranger knelt against the dusty ground, and stared intently up at her, prompting Asha's attention to be settled down toward him. He spoke, gestured to her collar, and offered to remove it for a price.

But there was a problem.

"I can't give the location" she said, biting on her lower lip for a second of thought. "I haven't been there yet, and outsiders aren't given access. Only Je'daii." It was a most sacred place, after all, one which was lost to its surrounding landscape. Qae had designed it well.

And did she want the collar removed? Could it be removed? Aellin had always hinted at the fact that the only one who could remove the collar was himself... And given his command of the darkside she didn't doubt it to be true.

"And it won't come off" she said, a certainty to her tone... "It can't be removed, he made it that way."

She took another slight step back. What if this man had been waiting for an opportunity, an excuse, to snap? What if he truly was working for Aellin? Would she please her Master by not giving in to temptation? He'll already be livid with me for tracking down Papa... Everything else is inconsequential.

"I'm sorry. I could take you to the birthplace to our Order, to the Tho Yor of Tython, or the old Temple of Akar Kesh on Bakura... The Caves of Aurum... But not our home." They weren't a threat. Not to the Jedi, not to the Sith, not to anyone. The Je'daii were scholars above all else, they did not seek conflict and would attack only in defense for the most part. There were exceptions, of course. There always were.

"I can take you to them, any of them, I can teach you about what our Order means... And you wouldn't even have to remove the collar."

[member="Connor Harrison"]

 

[Connor Harrison]

Connor narrowed his eye slightly, the one with the vicious scars underneath.

"So if you’ve never been there, how will you get there? Someone must know. Maybe they will tell me for a price."

It was clear by his tone he wasn’t messing around. Maybe this girl would be worth something. Connor stood and brushed his knee down and his hands.

"Leave the collar if you wish. But if you’ve given up trying to remove it already, then that’s a shame. Nothing is ever permanent." He waved for her to get up. "Up. I think the Je’daii will tell me what I want if I have you as a bargaining chip, don’t you think? Or would they think less of you to leave you in my hands so I could do what I wanted and rip the information out of your head. Hm?"

He looked down at her.

"Are you sure you don’t know. Think about your answer. Think very hard."

[member="Asha Hex"]

 

[Lief]

He didn't believe her. Not with regards to their home, nor the collar, none of it. She stared at him for a moment, as he rose from the ground and dusted off his knees, as he stared her down with thinly veiled warnings in his glare. It reminded her of Aellin, though if she had dared deny him it would've been more than words she'd be met with.

"The Je'daii aren't like the other Orders which taint the Galaxy" she said, remaining as she was for a moment. "We're wanderers, we do much of our main journey alone; I have had no cause to seek out our home, I merely know that there is one. I also know that it has stood empty for years. So no, there isn't anyone you can bargain with. My people are spread far and wide, held together by little more than an idea. I don't think you get it. We don't need fancy Temples, or squadrons, or physical manifestations at all."

She finally stood to her full height, keeping her expression calm.

"For all I know, the last remnants are dead and the ideology lives on in just myself. Which means that our home will remain lost, reclaimed by nature. And that's fine with me." Papa was alive, but he had strayed from the path. Damn Silvers always interfering. Jyn? and Sargon? Who knew where they were. And the rest... Gone. Simply gone.

"The Galaxy doesn't all work the same way. I can take you to the Tho Yor, I can take you to Aurum, I can take you to Bakura. You can be shown what we are, what we were... But that is all I can offer you, and there is no one to hold me leverage over. I walk alone."

She lifted a hand to toy with the collar, looking away from him.

"I don't know if the collar can be removed. I don't know if he simply got in my head, and made me think otherwise. I don't know if he's watching me now, here with you, if he can hear me, if he will know if I so much as try to remove it. Nobody else has even noticed it. Not one single soul. Yet you did. You saw it there. Why?"

In that moment she seemed much more like what she was: a child, lost and forced to wander alone. Held together by the ideology of her forefathers...

[member="Connor Harrison"]

 

[Connor Harrison]

Running his tongue along his teeth, Connor had nothing to fight back with. She made a lot of sense, and for once made Connor see so much of what was materialistic when it came to serving a side. Light. Darkness. A balance. He had failed serving the Light, but still felt….

He looked away to the outside and sucked in a breath at her question.

"Because I looked at you and saw it, why do you think? Is everyone else blind."

Connor walked out of the tomb, ducking under the stone lip and emerging into the hazy warmth and blood-orange sun and landscape that surrounded them. He had to get out of there. Fresh air was good. Cleared the head.

"It’s not hard to miss if you look at a person properly for who they are, not what you expect them to be. You wear it. I saw it. And don’t talk mumbo jumbo about he. And who is ‘he’ anyway? There’s nobody here bar you and me. I could…I could cut that thing right off with my blade I bet."

He turned, feeling her following him outside.

"How old are you anyway? 16? And what do I call you."

[member="Asha Hex"]

 

[Lief]

His answer was so blunt, so obvious, that it had her realizing how blind people must really have been. Sure she hid it as best she could, but it had been in view before. Yet this stranger, of all people, chose to acknowledge it.

She watched as he walked away, and for a moment blinked curiously. Remaining in place. Did he want her to follow? Hurrying toward the entrance, she listened to what he was saying. Her eyes fixed up to the warm sky.

"He... He was..." What? What was Aellin? Was there even really a word for it? "He's the one who took me, who put this here." She settled her hand away from the collar and sighed slowly. He wasn't here though, this stranger was right. How could he be watching them?

"But... What if it won't come off?" What if Aellin had been correct? What if, what if, what if... It was as though her head might explode at any moment. Instead she turned from him and stared into the distance.

"I don't know, I was 15... But, I don't remember how long ago that was. And you can call me Asha."

[member="Connor Harrison"]

 

[Connor Harrison]

Watching her from his tall frame, he said or did nothing as she went on questioning herself and her very being it seemed. She was an odd one.

"Well I’d say you seventeen….eighteen. Not fifteen. I’ve seen girls your age. And I can easily cut through that think in a second but it’ll burn your neck. Your call."

It was as easy as that.

But, who was he?

"Who is HE. Who put you here? You need to learn to be more forthright with answers – don’t go all crazy. Just give me the name .Master? Father? Who? And if he did that to you," he pointed at her neck, "I’d say it’s for insurance. Not going to blow your head apart."

[member="Asha Hex"]

 

[Lief]

She wrinkled her face a little. Could she really be nearing 18 years old? It seemed like only yesterday that it was her 15th birthday, and her Papa had presented her with a ship. "Eighteen?" she whispered, looking to him... Then away from him again. "I... I lost three years to him?"

That was a terrifying thought. Of course, up came the question of who he was. She sighed, and looked to her feet.

"He... He was a Sith." Oh he would be so livid if he knew she was talking about him. She needed to stop. Now. Before he... Stop, Asha. He isn't here. And even if he is, he won't kill you. Hurt, maybe, but he needs you in one piece. He said as much.

"A Sith who enslaved me. Three years? Are you sure..?"

Her hand lifted to her throat, where the collar lay. She shrugged... Maybe he could try to cut it off. But would it work? Was she willing to risk it?

[member="Connor Harrison"]

 

[Connor Harrison]

Connor shrugged.

"Hey, I don’t know kid, I’m throwing it out there. Okay, call yourself sixteen then if that helps. It’s only a number. Don’t fret."

With a perplexed look out, wondering how he had come to babysit again, he sighed and looked to the girl who was rambling.

"So you’re saying your old man was a Sith and locked you up and then let you go with a collar? Sounds like you need something more than a Je’daii cult to save you. Why don’t you come with me. I’ll help you find your path. You’re young enough to learn but old enough to know much more."

[member="Asha Hex"]

 

[Lief]

She realized how foolish she was looking in that moment. She had gone from the self-sure girl who stood up to the Sith, to a scared child looking for... What? Guidance? Never. Not Asha Hex.

"It doesn't matter my age."

Looking around them, narrowing her eyes to the ferocity of the sun, Asha nearly choked on what he said next.

"Oh. No. He wasn't my Father. He was a Sith... I ran into him on Thule, while escaping a storm. No, my Papa's anything but a Sith. And I told you already, the Je'daii aren't a cult."

She frowned for a moment, before shaking her head.

"I don't need help finding my path. And I won't walk within the darkness. Aellin tried to make me, it didn't work. Not even inside that disgusting Graveyard of a ship he called home. But you... You're not a Sith."

So matter of fact, but she felt it. The uncertainty in him, the darkness yes but it hadn't completely taken him over.

"Maybe you should be the one coming with me. Force knows you're not on the right path..."

[member="Connor Harrison"]

 

[Connor Harrison]

He looked at her as she rambled.

"No, I’m not a Sith. Not yet anyway."

With a sigh he looked out, ignoring her last comment. He had failed on the journey before it had even begun, and had he settled for second best? The First Order and the Ren? A Disciple on a journey where he already should be Master?

That was Coci. It was all her fault. He snapped himself out of the pity wallowing and looked back to the child.

"I don’t think these Je’daii will be my sort of people." Yet he was interested. ”Maybe I’ll come to see what you preach. Maybe. But I think you’re wasted with them. I could teach you about the Force myself and the real workings of it in our galaxy. You’d be the perfect warrior."

[member="Asha Hex"]