Private Lush Life

[Allyson Locke]

//: Reunion //:
//: Kiribi //:
//: Echani Enclave //:
//: Jyoti Nooran //:

The sound of a speeder shut off near the outskirts of the Echani Enclave on Kiribi. It had been some time since Allyson had visited the enclave and one of her best friends in the galaxy. She owed the woman her life on more than one occasion. Unloading the speeder, she brought a few gifts for Jyoti’s kids from Coruscant along with a few books. Slinging, her bag over her shoulder Allyson made her way up the pathway towards the enclave. ​

​

On approach, Allyson looked up from watching feet move along the gravel pathway. Luscious green hills with clear rivers cutting through them met her gaze. The sight was always breathtaking, and Allyson wondered why she ever left whenever she had come to stay with Jyoti and the other Echani. Buildings sprung up, reminding her of the architect of the home planet of the Echani, Jyoti had created an oasis home away from Eshan. The former Grand Master had done well for herself, which made Allyson happy, especially knowing that the Echani was as far from the fight as possible. ​

​

To her, Jyoti had done her duty. Fought the Sith, died, and came back. She commanded armies, fleets and even nurtured the next generation of Silver Jedi. She was due for some comfort for the rest of her life. Allyson hoped to achieve that in her life as well. To come home from the fight and to create something like home to others like her. As much as she had hoped to retire one day, something told her otherwise. The thought of never fighting again was a pleasant dream that the Corellian figured would never happen. ​

​

Finally, arriving at the building that belonged to the head of the enclave, Allyson knocked a few times. She had been looking forward to this trip for some time, especially after Munnilist had been one by the NIO. Her fight with Kaine Zambrano left a few scrapes and bruises, but the knots in her back were working their way out. Buildings vs. Corellians were never a good thing for the Corellian. In most cases, the Corellian usually lost the fight. ​

​

Setting the bag down, she rubbed her lower back with a slight wince. She didn’t realize books and toys were more cumbersome than they seemed. As she waited for the door to open, Allyson looked back out towards the scenery of the enclave - the place was as tempting as it always was.​

 

[Jyoti Nooran]

Lyfja, Kiribi

There was no answer at the door, and the house appeared silent. Allyson would be left standing there for a good minute, before she was met with a familiar alto voice.

"Ah, you're early."

Jyoti had come around from the back of the house, hands covered with soiled leather gloves - she had been gardening. Beaming, she quickly pulled off the gloves into one hand, then skipped over to Allyson to give her a big hug that almost swept the smaller woman off her feet.

"Not that I'm complaining. It's good to see you again."

It wasn't Allyson's first visit here, but it had been some time since the last. So many things had happened since then, the pair had a lot of catching up to do.

"Bastian left to pick up the kids from school, so it's just us for the moment," she pulled away, then motioned for Allyson to follow her around back. "Let's have a chat over some iced tea."

A wide wooden deck in the backyard gave way to large well manicured garden in the back, full of bright lush specimens gathered from across the planet. In the distance, a dome shaped greenhouse stood in isolation, housing more exotic offworld species Jyoti didn't want to intermingle with the local flora. There was a steady gentle breeze that blew across the garden, carrying the sweet scents of flowering plants and herbs.

"Make yourself at home. I'll go get the tea."

Allyson Locke

 

[Allyson Locke]

Allyson grinned at the comment of her being early, "Better than my usual tardiness. Look at me learning how to tell time." ​

The hug was something Allyson didn’t realize she needed. She couldn’t grasp if it was the familiarity or if it was just the warmth of someone being happy to see you. A small laugh came from the Corellian as she hugged her friend back tightly before being released. Her mind was at ease, a rarity in her current state. Grabbing the bag she brought full of goodies, she nodded, hearing that the Echani’s husband was getting the kids. “Oh, good. I brought the kids some stuff from Coruscant and Corellia.” ​

She had recently found herself on Corellia, a place that she hadn’t been in some time. A good tenish year when she actually thought about it. The place had too many painful memories, but it was a good move for her to get over them. The travel bags dropped her feet as she entered the back patio, her eyes falling in love with the view and sighed softly. Jyoti had done quite well for herself, and Allyson felt a twinge of jealousy. All of this was something she longed for.​

The beauty or just the stability - it was still something. Allyson waited for her friend’s return, and when she did, she procured a few seeds in a jar. “Small gift for your garden. They’re Jebwa flowers from Corellia. Thought you’d enjoy them.” Allyson handed the small jar of seeds to the woman and then settled in. She removed her jacket, one given to her by an old friend, leaving her in her more comfortable attire of a white shirt and the Corellian blood stripes. This simple life of catching up, it was ideal and tempting. ​

“Feels like forever since I’ve been here, you’ve done a lot of work with the place - looks really fantastic.” The scent of the flowers caught up to her, and she inhaled - her mind burning searching for a memory, but Allyson was able to keep it together.​

Jyoti Nooran ​

 

[Jyoti Nooran]

"Awww, thanks! The kids will love it!"

She motioned for Allyson to follow her back around, practically bouncing with every step in excitement. She tried to keep her bearing, but it was so hard now that her friend was here.

After she left Allyson on the deck she raised her hand high to wave once her back was turned to Corellian. On her return, she came back with a large covered platter masterfully balanced in one hand.

"Considerate as always," Jyoti complimented as she looked down at the flowers. "These will look great in the garden. Now, let's see if I can return the favor."

She set down the platter before Allyson, her smile growing ever wider. Upon removal of the lid, she revealed that there was no tea awaiting her friend, but a shiny cake.

"SURPRISE!"

Almost two dozen grinning Kiribian heads popped up from behind hedges and bushes, most recognizable as members of her old unit, Onyx Squadron. Not only the pilots, but also several of the mechanics and deck crew of the Nightshade, Jyoti's personal ship where Allyson had once served. A few of those heads were silvery white like Jyoti - her family.

"I hope you didn't think we hadn't heard about the exploits of a certain Corellian on Muunilinst."

There had been a reason Jyoti hadn't immediately answered the door. She had to shoo everyone outside the house into their proper places for the surprise! Even then, it was usually a pain to hide from any Force User, but a light snack hours before had provided them with ample cover. Her waving was to signal everyone to get ready to pounce.

"Mommy! mommy! We got her didn't we?!" Casval screamed as he ran up to the women, hopping up and down in glee.

"Hmmm, Ally, did we?" She asked as she pulled her son to her side.

Allyson Locke

 

[Allyson Locke]

Jyoti Nooran
​

Allyson had expected something calm, and a nice talk with her friend before the woman’s family got home from the errands. The cool breeze felt as if this pocket of the galaxy was free from the disasters that happened. The platter placed in front of her and Allyson tilted her head, something told her was up with how wide the grin on Jyoti’s face had gotten. The Echani was a known prankster, Allyson has found herself on the other end of these pranks several times in their times of being friends. ​

​

The lid of the platter was lifted, and Allyson was greeted by a cake, as much as she enjoyed Jyoti’s iced tea, the cake was a far superior option. Her face lit up, and then suddenly, the shouting of SURPRISE nearly threw her off her seat. Several people appeared, and Allyson looked at each of them, there were notable people like Aubrey and the other Onyx members and Jyoti’s family. It had been so long since she had seen so many of these people. As usual, Allyson dove headfirst into work and fighting the good fight, forgetting that there was more to life than war. ​

​

“Oh my Force, everyone!” The Corellian covered her face, which was now redder than a cherry, giving everyone a smile and a hearty laugh. A part of her felt like crying, everything that had been going on in her life was miserable, and here in this place she had thought fondly of - she found a bit of happiness. Hands dropping from her face, she laughed again with a wide smile. ​

​

“I didn’t think the news had reached out that far. I can’t believe everyone’s here, Aubrey and --” Allyson cut herself off as she buried her face into her hands again. A small voice echoed, and it was one she quickly recognized as Jyoti’s son. She revealed her beet-red face to the boy and nodded quickly. ​

​

“You got me, Casval, you got me really good! Did you help make the cake with your mom?” Jyoti’s family always welcomed her - she was more at home than in the cockpit of an X-Wing or even buried deep behind enemy lines. Again she asked herself why she didn’t just drop everything and live the rest of her time here? Seeing the boy, she realized she knew why because while he lived his life here peacefully, she was out there trying to keep the people dear to her safe. ​

​

Reaching into her bag, she pulled out a model kit and handed it to the boy. “I saw this in a store on Coruscant and thought of you. You like building things, yeah?” Allyson hoped she picked the right toy for the boy, she hadn’t been to visit in some time, and children’s tastes seemed to change with every setting of the sun. Looking back up to Jyoti, she caught her breath and nodded. “You don’t know how much I needed that, this - I’ve missed you, my friend.”​

 

[Jyoti Nooran]

The last thing Casval expected was a gift at someone else's surprise party, so he started running around the table with his new present, even if the youngling didn't exactly understand what had been given to him at first. After a few rotations, Jyoti held out a hand to his shoulder to stop his progress.

"What do you say to Ms Locke?"

"Oh...THANKS!" he flashed her a big grin while holding up the box over his head in triumph.

Artesia was nowhere near as exuberant as her brother, but nonetheless, the sight of her twin brother getting a prize drew her out from the bushes in quick time. Jyoti chuckled as the small girl came to nestle under her arm, looking out expectantly at Allyson, and then the cake.

Eventually, everyone else came closer to congratulate the Corellian and get the party started.

"I didn't tell everyone about it, but just the people who could truly appreciate what you did."

Almost everyone present were veterans at fighting the Sith Empire, and it was heartening to know that the vile order may yet be on its last legs after causing so much suffering over the years.

"You always have a home here, and people who love you."

Allyson Locke

 

[Allyson Locke]

You always have a home here, and people who love you.​

Jyoti didn't know how much Allyson needed to hear that simple phrase. So many times, Allyson had searched for that feeling of home and so many times failed to find it. There were moments when a palace would wear the facade home, but in the end, it was gone just as quickly as it came. Allyson smiled, nodding at the words and could feel the urge to tear up, but she pushed it back with the distraction of the appearance of Artesia. "Thank you, you are always good to me."​

​

It brought a smile to her face seeing the excitement Casval had for the box. Time and again, Casval reminded Allyson of her younger brother, the way he was active and excited over things such as the model kit. There was a small pang of pain that ached at the Corellian's heart as she wondered what kind of man the boy would have become. Would he have gone into the ship creating business like their father, or would he have followed their cousin into all forms of tech? Would he have been force sensitive like her? There were so many questions that would never be answered. ​

​

Looking back to Artesia, the Corellian started to dig in her back, searching for the present she had brought the girl. Unlike her brother, Artesia was a bit shyer and sought the comfort of her mother while expecting a gift from the visitor. "Artesia, don't think I forgot you." Her hand dug around the back until the head of a small little black Loth cat poked out. It was obviously stuffed, but it was the size of its living counterpart. Allyson made the stuffed animal poke its head out as if it was alive and made little meows at the girl. Pulling it out, she offered it to the girl. ​

​

"It was tempting to get her a real one, but traveling with it would have driven my sinuses crazy." Allyson chuckled softly as she continued to make the stuffed animal move playfully until the girl grabbed it. ​

​

"All the important people are here, that's enough for me. You guys are my family, I'm sorry it's been so long between my visits. I thought returning to the core would give me more time to do things." Allyson thought quietly as she remembered her trip back, she wanted to visit more and live her life - but she fell so quickly back into her work. ​

​

"But, I do what I always do - work too much." The Corellian chuckled at the comment, but diving deeply into her work was her only way of running from her nightmares' resurgence. "I think if we don't get into this cake soon, Artesia is going to drool on your dress. How have things been around here? More Echani now that, the uh - Queen has stepped down and there's a new one? The Silver Jedi govern Eshan don't they?"​

Jyoti Nooran ​

 

[Jyoti Nooran]

Artesia perked up at the sight of the stuffed animal, and reached out to pluck it out of the air The girl had been tepid at the thought of not getting a gift like her brother, but as soon as she saw that wasn't the case she warmed up in glee.

"Thank you!" she exclaimed, then joined her brother, skipping with her new toy and moving from the patio to the wider lawn. Both children were still toddlers, but already they moved with the dancer's grace of the Echani.

"It looks like those too will be quite occupied for the afternoon," Jyoti noted with a chuckle. "I don't blame you keeping busy. Field work can be quite enjoyable. Even I still like to get out now and then."

Rounding out the quartet of the family was Bastian, he strolled up beside Jyoti, leaning slightly against her chair and draping a hand around her shoulder. She looked up at him, gently beating his chest with a hand, then turned her silver gaze back to Allyson.

"I hope the cake is to your liking, I had a lot of fun with this one."

The Echani were best known for their martial prowess, but with their ranks were a whole host of skilled artisans - Bastian was one of the gastronomical variety. The chef's blades were not only for the battlefield, but the kitchen as well.

"We've actually had quite a few Echani immigrate to Kiribian space as of late, after the Mandalorians had their way with Eshan. However, some have returned to help rebuild now that the capital was liberated. Hopefully under the protection of the Silver Jedi, they may finally have some breathing space to recoup."

"Yes. I bear no ill will toward the former Queen, though I am pleased to see some new blood at the reins. For the moment, there seems to be peace between the Eshan and Thyrsus again."

Jyoti picked up a knife, beginning to slice a piece of the cake for Allyson. As she lifted the piece from the half moon of confection, once could see the layers of vanilla cake marbled with layers of dark fruit filling.

"The first piece for the lady of the hour."

She beamed as she pushed it toward Allyson with invisible tendrils of the Force, the saucer of cake drifting along like a feather caught in a breeze.

Allyson Locke

 

[Allyson Locke]

Seeing the cake being sliced into, Allyson felt her mouth water. She had a small spot for the sweets that she usually kept away from herself. The Corellian looked out for her fitness, but indulging in a piece of cake from the gastronomical genius Bastian was heaven. Allyson couldn’t help her smile as she watched Jyoti cut into the cake and float it her way. Catching the plate, she smiled, “This looks amazing Bastian, you’ve outdone yourself.” ​

​

A fork worked its way through the moist vanilla cake and dark fruit, “Ah yeah, I heard the former queen stepped down and all.” Allyson nodded, she didn’t care too much about the politics of Eshan. Her care stretched as far as it did only to make sure that her friends who were Echani were happy. Jyoti had done a good thing with the Enclave. “Are you guys reaching out to the new leaders of Eshan get some sort of uh,” Allyson paused and took a bite of the cake and felt her whole world just come alive. ​

​

Finishing her bite, she caught a bit of the fruit on the side of her face. A finger moved to scoop it up, pop it into her mouth. “Mm.” She relished in the delicious flavors that melded together. The man was a culinary genius, and she wondered how Jyoti stayed in shape with the treats that probably came out of their kitchen. Remembering she was in the middle of a statement, “Oh, Reaching out. Do you guys have any contact or anything with the Silvers and with the Eshan government?” She was curious how the Silver Jedi was doing, she hadn’t had much connection with them upon her return to the Core. ​

​

“My Force - this cake is amazing.” Allyson continued to indulge her sweet tooth.​

Jyoti Nooran

 

[Jyoti Nooran]

Bastian crinkled his eyes in appreciation, then decoupled himself to take over the cake slicing from Jyoti. Everyone else gradually coalesced around the table, eager to for their slice of the exotic looking cake.

"Normally dessert comes after the entrée, but we had to keep the secret."

Inside, the couple had a whole spread of meats and freshly picked vegetables through throw on the grill later.

"There has been some aid sent, but otherwise I haven't really involved myself in the affairs of Echani Command. The same could be said about my relations with the Silver Order."

Ever since she had retired as Grandmaster, few of her comrades remained. Valae was wandering the Outer Rim. Valkren was consumed with his work. Josh was a hermit. Allyson had gravitated toward the new Alliance. She used to pride herself on being familiar with most faces that had passed through the halls of the Silver Rest, but these days they were almost all foreign to her.

"Perhaps I'll become more active again as the twins grow up, but for now I'm content with my current station. Right now I'll leave all the heroics to you."

Jyoti wasn't a clout chaser, but she did find it unfortunate that most people outside their circle wouldn't know about her accomplishments in safeguarding their way of life. The life of an operative could be a truly thankless job.

Allyson Locke

 

[Allyson Locke]

Allyson couldn't help but laugh, Bastian was right, dessert usually came after a meal. Yet today was special, so the backward dining was appropriate. She watched as everyone moved quickly to get their piece of the cake. The man had outdone himself, and Allyson decided she should probably stick around, maybe to get some tips on his technique. Making plans was something she rarely did, thinking about staying around to just learn some recipe felt weird. The Corellian didn't know how to place the emotion, but she did her best not to show her confusion.​

​

Looking to her friend, she nodded, "The Silver Order from my understanding has been more forward with their own war front. I haven't involved myself quite as much. It seems the major players have changed drastically." She paused and took another bite of the cake. Her mind wandered for a minute to the others, which she remembered under the Silver Jedi flag. It had been so long since she had seen any of them, but she wasn't as close to them as she was with Jyoti. "I hope everyone is doing alright. Are you in touch with anyone?"​

​

Maybe it was the Corellian being too hopeful, but she had wondered if any of the old group would be around for this moment. Not seeing anyone's face, she looked back to Jyoti. Allyson felt her smile fade, and her shoulders tense when her friend spoke of returning to the Silver Order. "Don't go back, Jyoti." Her words are quiet but loud enough for the Echani to hear.​

​

"You have everything here. Someone who loves you, kids, a home, and people who depend on you - you have a life. You're living what all of us dream about." She looked at the cake and played with the dark fruit folding into the sponge of the cake. "I'd give anything for this, but it's why I keep fighting. I don't want something to happen to you - it's just getting worse out there, nothing is getting better."​

​

As much as she could plead with Jyoti, the woman was the type that made up her mind and did what she needed to do. Though Allyson hated thinking about the worst that could happen to the Echani. "You've done so much for this galaxy, you deserve a quiet life."​

Jyoti Nooran ​

 

[Jyoti Nooran]

She was taken aback by Allyson's warning. Begging, more like it, never wanting her to return to field work for her family. At that moment, she could almost sense a feeling of envy from the Corellian. She supposed it was true, she did have a family and a community, while Allyson really had nothing but her work.

Once...we had each other.

They were still friends, but obviously the dynamics of their relationship had changed. Sometimes, like now, she wondered if Allyson harbored some resentment against her settling down.

Her smile faded, clasping her hands together as she considered her words. Bastian to his credit, continued on with the cake slicing as if unperturbed despite hearing Allyson's words.

"I can't lie...life is pretty good now. It's nice being able to sleep through the night without worrying about a mortar round crashing through my roof, or an assassin slipping through the window." Her eyes drifted over to her children, now frolicking in the gardens with some of her friend's younglings. "However, a parent's first duty is to protect their children. A Jedi's oath is to defend the helpless. I know what's happening out there right now, and in good conscience I can't hide away forever."

The respite was much needed after several decades of war, but her service was far from over.

"Perhaps we can discuss this more tonight?" She reached out a hand across the small table, now holding one of Allyson's. "For now, I want you to just relax and enjoy yourself. You've earned it."

Allyson Locke

 

[Allyson Locke]

Jyoti was right; the conversation was terrible for the time and place. Allyson nodded, agreeing with the woman. “Yeah, tonight would be better.” She smiled softly and then returned to her cake, her eyes trailed off to watch the children play. It would be a lie if she denied the small pain of jealousy she had for the Echani’s life.​

​

There were parts of her that wondered how different things would have been if their relationship didn’t change from what it was before. Would they still be fighting? Would they have settled down? Thousands of questions lingered with the Corellian, but she knew none of them would have been answered. She mused as she bit into the slice of cake if she could ever have this. Thoughts lingered to another as she smiled, maybe there was hope.​

​

The party had continued till the evening. Once everyone had left, she retired to the room that was prepared for her. Some of her old belongings still remained in the room from a previous stay. Allyson felt terrible, she had left some of the more sentimental things behind, such as photographs and knickknacks she and collected with the Silver Order.​

​

Sitting on the edge of her bed, she sighed and looked at a photo of Onyx Squadron. She had seen Aubrey, but she wondered about the others. Allyson felt guilty leaving as she did, but missions and work of being a Shadow had taken over. Either way, as much as she wanted to think about the good old times, she thought about what Jyoti had said. The life of a Jedi and the life of a parent both seemed to abandon one’s life for someone else’s.​

​

The Corellian frowned and wondered if she would ever have a hold of her own life long enough to have what Jyoti had.​

Jyoti Nooran ​

 

[Jyoti Nooran]

Following the outburst, the party continued smoothly for the rest of the afternoon and into the evening. Old crewmates shared stories while their children played against the backdrop of the fading sun.

It was a pleasant affair, though Jyoti couldn't help but now feel certain thoughts nagging her in the back of her head. Their connection wasn't quite as strong as before, but she could sense that her friend was troubled by something now that attention had been brought to it. However, then wasn't the time to address the problem. Not until the guests had left, and she had tucked away her children for the night.

Once she tidied up the kitchen with Bastian, she loaded up a tray with the last pieces of cake coupled with fresh tea, then headed upstairs to Allyson.

She knocked softly on the open door before inviting herself in.

"I thought it would be fair if you had the honors of polishing off the cake. I'm surprised we managed to save any - it was a big hit."

Allyson Locke

 

[Allyson Locke]

Jyoti had snuck up on her, something rare for the Corellian, but her mind was occupied with so much nowadays. Sitting up, Allyson ran her fingers through her long brunette hair brushing it from her eyes. A smile lit up her face as she saw the remnants of the cake. “I was worried that only in my dreams would I be able to taste this again.” Her excitement showed as she took one of the remaining slices and took a quick bite. Heaven appeared in her eyes as she sighed happily and nodded.​

​

“Still as good as I remembered it a few hours ago.” The Corellian laughed at her own joke, something she was known to do. A part of her felt a little bad, she had seen the kids eyeing the pieces of cake. “You know there was probably cake left over because Charlie wasn’t here.” The sweets monster would have made sure that cake would have been demolished. Taking another bite, she smiled and nodded.​

​

“Thank you again, you really don’t know how much I needed that. It feels good to be thought of, you know. See that the work you’re doing and the sacrifices are worth it.” Allyson continued to eat the cake and smile towards her friend. She fought because she didn’t want Jyoti to have to fight, despite her being a Jedi there was a time when she was needed, but not anymore. The Corellian remembered her mother and when she was taken by the tragedy. She would hate to see Jyoti’s own children feel that pain.​

​

She had to keep fighting to help prevent that.​

Jyoti Nooran ​

 

[Jyoti Nooran]

Jyoti chuckled at the mention of Charlie.

"Mmm, you're probably right. Bastian probably would have had to bake a second cake. Not that he minds, however, he always calls her his number one customer."

She gave a little handwave as Allyson kept thanking her for the party, then set the tray on the nightstand to hug her friend on the side as she took a seat on the bed.

"Nonsense, it was the least I could do. I know we don't go into this work to become famous (most of us), but it's still nice to be acknowledged the good you've done in the galaxy, and you just did a lot."

She pulled back from the hug, leaning back and propping herself with her hands. "So, would you like to talk about what happened? About anything? It seems like you have a lot on your mind."

Allyson Locke

 

[Allyson Locke]

The hug was warm and comforting, two things that Allyson needed and missed about the Echani. She returned the hug and nodded listening to the woman as she spoke. Allyson missed those hugs and she chuckled to herself about their past. Clearing her throat, the small trip down memory lane was cut short as Jyoti poked at Allyson’s mind. There was so much that was happening, the Corellian really didn’t know where to start. ​

​

She sighed and her expression changed, shifting showing that the emotional floodgates were starting to crack open. “I feel like nothing’s changed. Like nothing we did, nothing we fought for changed anything.” The tip of the iceberg, but she continued. “Joining the Alliance I thought it would be different, but I’m back to doing what I did before. Constantly being someone else, lying, and collecting secrets.” Allyson wondered if she should even be sharing this, shaking her head lightly, Jyoti knew what she did - the woman had trained her for Force’s sake.​

​

“Everything getting so mixed up, sometimes I wake up and I don’t remember who I am. The nightmares have come back, but then I really wonder if they ever left. It’s not really like before - they feel like movies or something playing in my head. I’m watching and I feel them happening, but ugh.” Allyson rubbed her temple for a moment, feeling the all too familiar headache come up. “Then I did a stupid thing and got involved with someone - I thought it would give me a chance at something, but I’m lonelier than ever.” ​

​

Allyson could feel her chest and throat burn as she fought back any tears. Why did talking about him do this to her? Allyson knew she was unhappy, she knew that it was probably a bad idea to pursue a relationship like this, but there were certain things she wanted and she figured he was her best bet. “I don’t even know anymore Jyoti, I’m just tired of feeling so unwanted and used. I’m good at my work, but I know if something goes wrong, I’m disposed of. This boy that I’m seeing only knows war and what he wants, he tries to care for me, but he wants nothing I want.” ​

​

She said it and there was no going back from it. Her doubts in the open about the Sword of the Jedi, she cared about him, but in her heart, she knew they were two ships sailing in the waters, just a moment in life. A hand covered her eyes as she groaned. To top it all off, her mind wandered to the Echani asset she was now involved within the Sith Empire. Another groan, as she realized how tangled her life had become.​

Jyoti Nooran ​

 

[Jyoti Nooran]

Jyoti nodded along as Allyson began to decompress, intimately familiar with her issues as they were all things she had experienced herself more that once.

"I definitely understand where you're coming from on the feeling of futility. Day by day, when we're in the thick of it, things can seem like they're not moving along. However, taking the long view, I think the galaxy has come a long way. You have to keep in mind that it only just emerged from centuries long dark age."

She reached out, placing her palm against Allyson's back.

"When you first came to me, your back was horribly mangled, and it wasn't clear you'd ever recover your full range of motion. Similarly, you were closed off to much of the Force. However, with time and care you overcame your handicaps and healed. The same thing is happening with our galaxy now. I remember when Jedi used to snub each other and even come to blows from time to time, but now we've finally got our act together and fight against the Sith and other adversaries as a great coalition. The tide is turning against the chaos, but these things just take time, and you've done a lot to get us to this point today."

Her palm glided downward to the small of Allyson's back before she removed her hand. "You can't go into a relationship a solution to your problems - all it does is create a bigger mess with another person added to the mix. A good relationship should really only be icing on the cake - you need to have a good foundation within before putting yourself out like that. I really sounds like things aren't working out right now, so the best option may be to break up and take time for yourself."

While now giving advice about self worth, she couldn't help but feel a twinge of guilt about Allyson's current state. It had been quite devastating for them both when she had come to the decision to split with the Corellian, but a necessary one.

"I never stopped loving you, and it was so hard to leave. It just never felt right, you know, I felt like I was holding you back by selfishly indulging in the passions of someone else. A copy of someone else."

Said copy was still rolling around in her head, stirring with jealousy over Allyson's new relationship, aching to take her then and there.

No.

Long had she mastered the specter in her mind, whispers now so faint they could barely be heard over the sound of her breath. It was just better that way.

However, she again reached out, stroking Allyson's shoulder now.

"I don't know how it is for you in the Alliance or with your partner, but let it be known that you are loved and cherished by many here. I hope today was enough to show that - you've impacted our lives so much."

Allyson Locke

 

[Allyson Locke]

It was, in a sense, a good feeling to know that she wasn’t alone in her thinking about the futility of their mission. Jyoti did her best to put into perspective that things were getting better despite how little she felt in the grand scheme of things. Allyson nodded and smiled slightly, wanting to thank the woman, but knew she had probably said enough thank yous for the day. ​

​

As the Echani’s hand glided down her back, Allyson was reminded of the familiarity of her touch. Eyes pulled away and looked towards the floor, trying to her best to ignore the swell of old emotions collecting in her chest. Allyson knew she honestly had never gotten over Jyoti, the love she had for the woman beside her would be with her for the rest of her life. It had started with someone else and blossomed into what she ended up feeling. Still, she understood the reasoning behind why Jyoti had to end things between them. ​

​

Fingers dug into the bedding, gripping tightly in frustration. “I know.” She nodded and then relaxed. “I haven’t stopped loving you either.” A soft chuckle, “I’m foolishly still trying to protect you - even though most of the time, you protected me.” Her head tilted to the side as she did her best to avoid looking at her old flame, she didn’t know if she could control herself now that they were talking about the past.​

​

“I loved her. I loved her so much; even now, just thinking about her makes me happy - but it hurts. Despite how much I loved Arisa, I fell in love with you, with Jyoti.” A small smile as she remembered their small conversations and how playful the Echani was - mostly teasing the poor Corellian relentlessly. “I always knew you were someone else and that you weren’t her. I know its dumb to even repeat myself, but you were never holding me back.” Shaking her head, Allyson smiled through it the pain she felt, “But I knew that you wanted more I wouldn’t have been able to give you any of this, as painful as it was I had to accept that and accept things ending.” ​

​

Allyson sighed and rubbed her eye, she didn’t want to cry despite feeling that would somehow make her feel better. Shrugging, she knew Jyoti was right about breaking things off with Ryv. “I don’t even know how it happened honestly, one minute I was in the hospital and he was connecting with me through the Force to understand me or something - the next I’m sleeping with him. It was all a blur. Especially since I - think I met someone else?” Pausing the Corellian knew she shouldn’t reveal what was going to come out of her mouth next, it was classified information, but she trusted Jyoti more than herself, more than anyone in this galaxy.​

​

“I’m undercover in the Empire, I know what I did was wrong - but I think the person I am there is in love with my intel source.” The confusion was written all over her face, she knew that the cover identity was her. Yet it felt like a totally different person. Hands covered her face as she groaned. “What the hell is wrong with me?"​

Jyoti Nooran

 

[Jyoti Nooran]

Jyoti felt her heart flutter for a few beats as Allyson admitted her love for her. Not for Arisa, but for her. The Echani was content with her current path and family, but that still meant a lot.

However, she'd only enjoy that euphoria for a fleeting moment before Allyson continued to described her messy love life.

A bad fling that should have stayed that way. That was one thing, but becoming entangled with an asset, from the Sith Empire no less? That was a problem.

She was compromised.

"This informant..." she started slowly. "Am I right to assume that they're a Sith?"

Her hand slumped from Allyson's shoulder. Jyoti spoke no words of judgment, but her gesture could be read as much.

Disappointment.

Allyson Locke