Sticks and Stones

[Kaili Talith]

Rave appeared more and more eccentric the more time Kaili spent with her. From the moment when she outright stated what was on her mind to the part when she approached her with a statement not too unlike something a security officer or a preacher man would have said. Kaili rose from her seat on the ground and placed herself in front of the alchemist.

Deep breath.

“Do it.” She uttered in defiance of her own mind.

[member="Rave Merrill"]

 

[Velok the Younger]

[member="Kaili Talith"]

A firm nod -- "Good" -- and a smile. Rave closed her eyes and focused.

The artifact she'd built was Light Side in origin, and frankly, most Light Side crafting was terrible. She'd had to use a variety of workarounds, bending Jal Shey imbuement and Ceran Kasha-crafting to unintended uses. Golden radiance flowed around the glove and shot out from the amber stone in the palm. It touched Kaili's face almost tentatively. The golden light danced in complex geometric patterns around them, a side-effect of the overclocked Kasha rites that she'd reduced to first principles.

In one respect, Rave had lied: the gauntlet did dredge up the memories in question. But as they came to mind, they did so with little of the pain attached. In and gone, in and gone, with less power to compel Kaili to dwell on them. It would, presumably, take a while. Kaili Talith had been collecting bad memories for years.

 

[Kaili Talith]

Kaili kept her eyes closed. The lights flashed against her eyelids, but as far as the complexity of its patterns went it was all lost on the young Borleian. At first it wasn’t very clear what was going on. Shapes began dancing in front of her like a holographic drama recorded on a surreal stage. They took on the shapes of different people. Aela, Karen Roberts and dead bodies. The backgrounds began to flesh out, expand inwards and outwards with hazy yet clear imagery as if someone was adjusting a camera before a live broadcast. A foreboding feeling of familiarty fell over Kaili, yet at the same time it really felt all the more distant to her and it didn’t just stop there. The entire scene from the mass grave and the ship crash alike was right there in front of her, played out as if she wasn’t actually there but she really was.

It was like getting wrapped up in a holoshow on the net. You felt like you were there, but some part of you knew that you weren’t. Only this time the fact of the matter was that Kaili had been there.

An uneasy sense of peace set itself over the memory. The pain was there, numbed but there. The memory was by all means there just as much as it had the last few months, but it too was numbed. It was a clear visual, but it wasn’t… Painful. Perhaps that was the word she was looking for. It hurt, but it wasn’t painful. She was merely okay with it, she felt relaxed.

She felt her eyelids grow heavier.

… And her knees.

Had she always been this exhausted?

Kaili collapsed.

[member="Rave Merrill"]

 

[Velok the Younger]

[member="Kaili Talith"]

"Well, feth."

Hissing between her teeth, Rave crouched over Kaili, joints clicking. She hooked her good arm under the girl's shoulders, Grip of Enlightenment and all, and her cyborg arm under the knees, then put her back into it. But Rave had never been large, and was no longer young, and Kaili somewhat refused to move. With a grunt, Rave closed her eyes and altered local gravity, warping the fabric of reality until Kaili weighed about twenty pounds. Much better. But even then, she felt relief all up and down her back when she unloaded her burden on the bed. Gravity returned to normal, and Rave let out a long sigh of discomfort.

She settled down on the bed, rubbing her thigh where it met the alchemized metal of her leg. The leg and the arm didn't like her much anymore: she'd made both in darker days.

"She'll wake up raw," Rave muttered. "Best to give her something else to think about. Yes...let's see. Mara says she likes...droids." Her steel-and-ivory hand opened and shut with a percussive click. "Reverse drain knowledge, mechu-deru vitae...who wouldn't lke that?"

She slipped off the Grip of Enlightenment and placed her bare hand on Kaili's forehead, then closed her eyes. There was no alchemical art but that Rave had studied. She'd been caretaker of the Belia Darzu holocron for some time, and had the tools to get more out of it than most of its other owners over past years. The kid probably wouldn't appreciate a solid chunk of Sith sorcery appearing in her mind, but there were principles to consider, relationships between flesh and nanomachine and Force. How to take the Force and apply it to self-replicating machines such that the second and third and fourth generations all had the same alchemical imbuement, the same relationship with the Force. That was the legacy of Darzu, for those with an alchemical bent and the wisdom to see. An interesting little trick with all kinds of implications.

 

[Mara D'Lessio Merrill]

[member="Kaili Talith"]

Truth be told, Mara hadn't been aware of Kaili's distress, at least not consciously. Mara's empathic sensitivity and her Force-bond with Kaili might have given her a more concrete picture if she'd been awake. As it was, Mara just had sad and frightened dreams -- that ended abruptly enough to throw her awake. She sat bolt upright, blankets pooling around her waist, heart racing, breath caught.

"Kaili."

Still clumsy from sleep, she pulled her blankets away and slid off the bed. The castle's chill sank in through her shift; she threw on her beskarweave-and-fur longcoat and belted it tight, then slipped on her boots. Even so, the cold was unavoidable. She had a rudimentary grasp of Tapas, the trick that allowed Jedi to control their body temperature; she used it now, and felt herself begin to warm. But all those preparations took time, and she felt mild shame that she was letting anything get between her and Kaili. Something was happening, but Mara couldn't say what. She snatched the Ankarres Sapphire off her desk and left the room, clomping down corridors.

Night-servants bowed, and she acknowledged them with a smile that she couldn't quite feel. She did, however, ask for hot chocolate to be brought to Kaili's room. It would arrive some time after Mara.

 

[Kaili Talith]

As far as Kaili’s perception on the mind altering experience went there wasn’t a whole lot to say. Because for the first time in months there wasn’t anything to actually relay. It was by all means a darkness, and nothing more than that. Kaili was at peace in a blank state of complete neutrality as if her brain refused to accept any other reality than the one it had been warped into. In this void time did as time usually do in a realm of dreams. Hours turned to minutes turned to seconds and before she knew any better Kaili could feel her eyelids opening at the sound of footsteps outside of her room. Worry was leaking through the force bond that the two women shared.

“Mara.” The Talith uttered in her bed as she too rose into an upright position. The light flashed against her cheek, blinded Kaili and forced her to she raise her hand to block it. The intensity of it sent a spike of pain by her temple and ever so slowly it seemed to spread towards the top of her head. There was a distinct buzz going on, but it was all hard to make sense of as if listening to a busted comm array. There was a voice, a faint one, buzzing amidst a sea of static.

Kaili groaned and with her fingertips pressed firmly against both sides of her head she proceeded to rub it in a circling motion.

“Morning.” She groaned, again, as her friend stepped inside. Eyes darted out to meet her, headache evident from the, well, rubbing going on. “Met your aunt last night.”

Kaili closed her eyes again to block out the sun. “Fascinating lady.”

[member="Mara D'Lessio Merrill"]

 

[Mara D'Lessio Merrill]

[member="Kaili Talith"]

Kaili's appearance and Force sense, her mention of Rave, and Mara's own dreams all came together into an unpleasant conclusion. "Oh gosh." Mara sat down on the edge of the bed, taking Kaili's hand. "Feth, she did the whammy on you, didn't she. The glove thing. She keeps suggesting she could use it on me, but I don't-"

Force forbid she imply Kaili's PTSD was worse or better than hers. That just wasn't couth.

"...uh, I haven't let her," she said lamely. She frowned. "Feth. The way she talked about it, it was just Kasha and Upari and some other crystal stuff. I thought it was pretty mild."

She found herself wanting to babble, explain, speculate, but the moment demanded she listen. She squeezed Kaili's hand.

"...you all right, Kay?"

 

[Kaili Talith]

“I don’t-” Kaili gritted her teeth and tried to open her eyes again. “-know.” But she failed. “I feel like I got hit in the head with a freighter.”

Not to mention the buzz, the name ‘Belia Darzu’ running on repeat and the fact that for the first time in a long while Kaili had slept properly. Or rather, as properly as imagery of twisted robotics got. What was a technovirus? Why was that…

“I let her-...” No, Kaili couldn’t go on. Something had to be done about the light in this room. “Look, could we maybe close the window or something?”

All things considered, Kaili had grown up on a planet where the lowest of lows was still fairly warm, and humid. The goosebumps on her arms spoke of the unpleasant temperature this particular morning brought about.

“...Please?”

[member="Mara D'Lessio Merrill"]

 

[Mara D'Lessio Merrill]

[member="Kaili Talith"]

"Oh! Yeah, uh-" Mara gestured. Closing a curtain was pretty much like Warden projected fighting anyway. The brocade drapes slid shut, rings rasping on the pole. This place really was coming along; it'd been a bit of a wreck when she moved in. The room fell into a comfortable gloom.

"There we go." She took a long breath and let it out slowly. "I'm kind of pissed, Kay. I doubt you signed up for, like, mental surgery. My aunt is...look, she tries to act nice, tries to be good and friendly and conscionable and all that, but she's still the same person who did a whole lot of straight-up evil. Experimenting on people, making and deploying bioweapons and nuclear warheads -- ugly stuff. I don't know whether I believe someone can change that much, at least not in one lifetime. Maybe once she goes back to the Force she'll have the time to get her head on straight, however that works, but look. She hurt you and that's not okay." Her blood was up. She had to calm down. But calm seemed as far out of reach for her as painlessness was for Kaili.

"I can't talk to her like this. I'll say something I regret. Maybe even do something. I don't want to end up Dark or whatever." Another long slow breath, in and out. "But I'll talk to her about this, better believe it. In the meantime -- here we go." The door opened, and a servant came in with a smile and two cups of hot chocolate. "Thanks, Matilde."

 

[Kaili Talith]

A distinct ‘burr’ echoed around the room as Kaili shivered once more. The cold was still there but the pain of light was not. The rubbing at her temple stopped and just in time for the sweet smell of cocoa to lift the spirit of everyone. The door opened and with it Kaili could even see the sugary sweet liquid and all it’s steaming glory. She smiled, albeit still in great pain.

“There will be no need to turn dark on my account.” She tried to chuckle but ended up coughing instead. “It’s more as if I had devoured that glass of wine I always stare at back home.” Genes gave her that ever so lovely habit of being the lightest of weights. Something she could live with. “Look, it’s my fault, really.” Hands grasped at the cup and Kaili nodded at the employee as they left the room. “Mara, I’ve…”

There was a break in the young woman’s speech as she came to realise the consequences of her midnight adventure. The memory that she had dwelled on for months had become something far less. It hurt, there was no doubt about that, but at the same time it really kind of didn’t. It was almost as if Kaili had found herself in a weird kind of balance. It made her uneasy to think that the woman had tampered with the memory, yet at the same time Kaili had really brought it upon herself.

What she needed wasn’t the wipe or the bandaid, what she needed was honesty. Not to herself, but with Mara.

“I’ve not been honest with you.” Kaili finished as she pushed her thoughts aside. “Yesterday on the balcony there was so much more I wanted to tell you, but I didn’t.”

“Your aunt tampered with a memory that’s kept me up at night for months, Mara.” Kaili looekd down at her hands again; ashamed. “I, uh…”

“I got people killed. Several hundreds, in a ship crash and I just-...”

Headshake. A familiar sense of helplessness fell over her again as a dejected sigh parted her lips.

[member="Mara D'Lessio Merrill"]

 

[Mara D'Lessio Merrill]

[member="Kaili Talith"]

Hot chocolate, so far as Mara was concerned, constituted the breakfast of champions in a castle this cold. She slurped appreciatively. As Kaili struggled with something akin to a confession, though, Mara nestled the warm mug against her stomach and listened.

"Y'know, back home on the planet where I grew up, when I was little I left this toy sword up in the crook of a tree and forgot about it. Went back home to visit Mom, and tree got hit by lightning my first night there. Split right down the middle, and there was my sword. The tree had grown around it, but it'd been the flaw right in the middle of things. That's what split the tree, see. Can't help but feel this is one bit of pain you've been holding onto for a while. I didn't know what was buried in you, but I knew you were hurting when you forgot to forget."

She took a long drink, steeling herself.

"It's not just you that's been keeping secrets, though mine's different. I never did tell you where I grew up. Well, out past the Outback, in some of the old Moross Crusade space, there's this secret planet. My mom found it years back. Islands and beaches and fruit and dugout canoes -- and its people don't know what war is. We would fly in at night, park the ship underwater, and blend in for a year or two at a time. That's where my dad's tattoo comes from, the one that goes from his wrist to his shoulder -- Mom has a matching one. It's the local equivalent of wedding rings. Anyway, Dad's done some pretty drastic things to keep that planet secret and safe. Apart from those that live on it, there's only three or four people that know it exists. Even Aunt Rave doesn't know where it is, though I'm sure she's guessed it's a thing. If anyone ever found out about the planet, it'd be hell. The crust is jam-packed full of aurodium, I'm talking enough to buy half the Rim and devalue the stuff galaxy-wide. Enough to make my fortune look like peanuts. If anyone ever found out about the place, the best-case scenario is they might screw up blending in, and the planet discovers there's other planets. Worst-case scenario is mass relocation and strip-mining. So it's not just my secret, see, but I've wanted to tell you and just you for...ages."

 

[Kaili Talith]

Kaili too sipped at her hot chocolate as it became Mara’s turn to explain what had happened between now and then. Perhaps it was a bit like the sword in the tree, the thorn hidden in plain sight that neither of them really wanted to admit was there. Yet now that it was there and it was seen, Kaili didn’t really feel the grand sensation of relief that she had expected there to be. Perhaps because in the end Kaili still knew she had secrets she had to keep from Mara. Not because she wanted to, force know Mara most likely already knew, but because the nature of them brought about a certain air of intimacy that quite frankly wasn’t there.

“I appreciate it.” The kid smiled, perked her brows and took another sip before readjusting herself in her bed. “Had you not known, I guess this is where I would have told you about the Moross, but… Well, you most likely already know about it.”

Hands firmly wrapped themselves around the ceramic container that seemed to be the only source of warmth within Kaili’s room. A careful glance went to the floor and the discarded pieces of clothing that wasn’t really hers. Really, the girl most likely owed it to herself to put on more than just an undershirt, but it was all within good time.

“So, you’re saying I hold the key to unlimited wealth and power right now?” The young Talith let off a (credit) chit eating grin and chuckle. It quickly faded. “No, really, I appreciate it, Mara. I won’t tell a soul. Got my word as a friend for it.”

The grin returned. “Even a pinky swear, if it makes you feel better.”

[member="Mara D'Lessio Merrill"]

 

[Mara D'Lessio Merrill]

[member="Kaili Talith"]

"Moross? Yeah, Aunt Rave had an alliance with them for years, a really close one. She talks about it sometimes -- sneaking into their territory to visit the Aing-Tii, all kinds of stuff."

Mara set the mug aside and wrapped her beskarweave-and-fur trenchcoat more tightly around her legs. "I know you won't tell," she said evenly, and meant it. "Not just 'cause my mom's a Lorrdian and my birth mother was a Zeltron, either, because it's not just that you're being honest, it's that I trust your quality. You do what you say you'll do."

Legs now halfway warm again, Mara reclaimed her half-empty mug and drained it down to the dregs. "Feth, I forgot. Here, try this on your headache." She fished a faceted blue stone out of her coat pocket and tossed it to Kaili. The Ankarres Sapphire. Pound for pound, the most powerful healing artifact in the galaxy, full stop.

 

[Kaili Talith]

There was no setting the mug aside for Kaili. The warmth it provided was far too invaluable to simply put away. A small smile curved on her lips as she let in a cold, crisp deep breath. Say what you will about the cold, it did provide a measure of freshness that was hard to achieve on a warm planet such as Borleias. Though in all honesty that one might have just have been the jungles and thick city air speaking.

Yet for all her intentions of holding on to the cup was worth, a brow was still perked and Kaili reached out to grab the shimmering blue stone that was offered to her. She placed it between her thumb and index finger and spun it around in front of her. A look shot out at Mara before it went back to the crystal again.

“What, like-” Kaili kept her brow perked as she placed the stone against her temple. “Like this?”

“Am I doing it right?”

Kaili had to admit, when it came to artifacts and the kind, she was about as green as you’d get.

[member="Mara D'Lessio Merrill"]

 

[Mara D'Lessio Merrill]

[member="Kaili Talith"]

Despite itself, Mara's anger fluttered away in a laugh of surprise and amusement. "Absolutely," she said, as close to deadpan as she could manage after laughing. "Just kind of bonk yourself on the head with it -- no, don't do that. Um, just focus on it, and I'll do the same. The crystal has serious healing properties. This is the straight-up Ankarres Sapphire. It can save lives even if the person using it doesn't have the Force at all. Doesn't take much focus to get it started. I don't think it works on mindwhammy, but it'll strip the tension out of your skull pretty good."

In short order, Kaili would feel the physical aspect of the headache begin to fade away. Mara hurried it along by using the Sapphire as a focus for Mara's own healing abilities. Healing might not be her speciality -- that was, and always would be, navigation -- but she could manage well enough thanks to Aleidis.

"Any better?" she said, and fished in her pockets, remembering something. She heard a clattering rasp and fished harder, then emerged with a similar stone, this one teardrop-shaped. "Minor version, just to see if I could make it. This one's for you."

 

[Kaili Talith]

Kaili was actually about to bonk herself in the head for a minute but quickly stopped herself as Mara told her it wasn’t how you did it and that it was a joke. With an arm on a slight diagonal Kaili looked at her friend as she relayed the instructions and felt more and more like an idiot. Of course it was the force that was the trigger, not physical contact. That was the one thing Kaili still seemed to have the greatest difficulty with and always had. Physical contact was great, punching things was one of life’s greatest pleasures and that was not to mention the latest touch screens on modern datapads. Which coincidentially was also just about the only time Kaili further utilized the force.

Yes, to operate and disassemble hardware of various kinds.

“Alright, I can do that,” Kaili blinked as she lowered the hand that contained the ‘Ankaress Sapphire.’ She closed her eyes, focused on the crystal and -- just like she had a few months ago -- felt like Mara’s student again. “... Master.”

Oh yes, the grin resurfaced. Albeit for a very short while as the artifact got to work. It was as if easing up a wrench clasped to the sides of your skull or a tightly knotted piece of fabric from your forehead. That same kind of indescribable relief that one would feel as blood suddenly had access to your brain again and proceeded to restart your mind processes.

A stammered yet relieved sigh parted Kaili’s lips.

“Oh force,” She spoke underneath her breath as the air slowly but steadily escaped her. “Oh that’s great.” It was almost like a dog getting a well-deserved scratch behind its ears. “I love you right now, Master Merrill.”

The Borleian put aside her cup of cocoa, opened her eyes and set them on Mara’s hand. Had the crystal just shrunk? She threw a quick glance in the other hand. Oh, no it hadn’t, but Mara was giving Kaili a crystal of her own.

“Thank you!” She burst out in a smile as her arms wrapped themselves around Mara in appreciation. “Lovely gift.”

Kaili looked at the crystal before she placed it on her end table next to the empty cocoa mug.

“And this one’s for you!” Kaili grinned as she handed her friend the empty cup. “Or well, your employees. Do you have anything to eat around here? I’m hungry!”

[member="Mara D'Lessio Merrill"]

 

[Mara D'Lessio Merrill]

[member="Kaili Talith"]

"Well, as it happens..."

***​

​

Not long thereafter, it came to pass that a good-sized breakfast was delivered to the heretofore invalid Lady Kaili in her bedchamber. Stacks of fried food -- flatcakes; thin strips of fatty, crispy meat; the eggs of local fowl -- shared platters with diced fruit in season and quantity. Water purity wasn't so good around here, though Mara had quietly installed an offworld purifier and enough piping to handle sanitary needs. The locals still didn't feel comfortable giving out water as a drink, so a silver pitcher and goblets held a mild wine, the standard drink of the region. Small bowls of dried fruit and chopped nuts accompanied the meal. It was, all things considered, a stupendous amount of work. Suffice it to say that Mara paid her staff very very well by local standards, for conscience purposes.

Mara half-opened the curtains and ate in a sliver of light at a small table not far from the bed. There was room to eat at the table, or to eat in bed.

 

[Kaili Talith]

Kaili blinked. Breakfast in bed. Now this was a luxury mainly indulged on birthdays, yet here it seemed it was what Mara had the ability to enjoy whenever. Kaili took a sip from the water before she nearly choked. Did she think it was water? Nope, wine. She let an awkward chuckle be heard as she placed the cup on the tray again and got herself out of bed, pulled the pants on the floor to cover her legs and then picked the tray up again. The entire plate seemed to wiggle and waggle as she slowly and just as equally shaky proceeded to walk on over to the table that Mara had taken a seat by. Eyes squinted to block out the sun, but at least the worst of the pain was gone.

“Saving the, uh, luxuries of bed-breakfasting for later.” Kaili snickered and took a seat opposite her friend. “Still can’t wrap my mind around this, you know. You living like a duchess or queen.”

Eggs, crispy meats and pancakes as well as a wide assortment of fruits and nuts. It was like a buffet, and something told Kaili the principle still applied. She wasn’t expected to eat the entirety of what had been placed in her lap as much as take what she enjoyed and call it a meal. The thought made it all the more harder to make her mind but in the end she went for the safest bet, the one she felt the most at home with.

The pancake.

“So,” Kaili began as she popped as neatly sliced piece of flatcake in her mouth. “Got anyshing planshed for the day?”

[member="Mara D'Lessio Merrill"]

 

[Mara D'Lessio Merrill]

[member="Kaili Talith"]

For her part, Mara filled half her silver plate with crispy meat and fried eggs, and the other half with chunks of fruit. She had a small flatcake as well, mostly just to mop up egg yolk and fruit juice. Low carbs: a warrior's meal. She drank the weak wine sparingly too. The hot chocolate had been plenty.

"Today? I need to hear a couple of petitions, check interstellar stock prices, handle some philanthropic disbursements, and train with the Rangers, but most of the day is probably free. If you want to play around, I have a small but fully functional machine shop, tech lab, and Force-crafting workshop in the basement. I was planning to spend some time sorting through some of the weirder Light Side crafting arts and seeing if anything really clicks for me. It's more my aunt's department than mine, but it's interesting stuff." She hid a smile behind a mouthful of bacon. "Not like -- mmph." She chewed and swallowed. "Not like I could ever match her or your brother, but still. I don't like not being able to do things, and there's definitely some weird little crafting avenues that I don't think anyone uses these days. I like making odd little things if I can. Like that crystal I made for you -- that was fun. Not piloting-fun, but fun."

 

[Kaili Talith]

Petitions, stocks, money and exercise. Royalty met ruthless capitalism almost. The foods on Kaili’s platter was devoured, but the wine remained mostly untouched. The two women hadn’t imbibed together before, but if they had Mara would have understood why Kaili was hesitant to drink the drink she was provided. Alcohol, no matter the permille coursing through her veins, seemed to send Kaili into a hazy fit of bubbling emotions.

“Sounds like you’re going to be busy.” Kaili perked her brow as she stuffed her mouth with the crispy meat and crunched away. “Not sure me working on droids is what we want right now, right? I mean, what’s the local populace’s opinion on walking, talking metal men?”

“I’d much rather not end my day with a bonfire.”

[member="Mara D'Lessio Merrill"]