Survival With A Pyne

[Cenric Marus]

[member="Mariya Pyne"]

Cenric stood frozen outside of her door in silence. In truth he hadn't really planned what he would say or how he would say it. All of this was more than a little bit new to him. Most of it was guess work. There was no guide for him here. No one to explain what to do in this situation, all he had to go on was his gut. Something that so far had let him down completely.

"I think I should..." He trailed off for a few seconds.

This entire situation was growing more painful by the second. Cenric found it harder and harder to actually choose the right words. Eventually he took in a breath and finished his sentence. "I think I should explain myself."

He continued quietly.

"Then I'll leave you alone." For the rest of the trip and after.

Cenric already planned not to take Mariyas ship back. mostly because that would be as painful to him as falling into another...situation with Mariya. Best to just get all of his thoughts out then get away from this entire thing. Get rejected and then get away.

 

[Mariya Pyne]

Hearing him speak, Mariya stared back at herself in the mirror, as if having a silent conversation with the image she was seeing in the glass, or perhaps an internal struggle as to whether or not she should let him in. Would explaining himself make things any better in all actuality? Or were they just about to step on another landmine along this journey? After a few moments of silence passed between the two with a sigh she set the straightener onto the table she was seated at.

"Fine. Come in." She grumbled, "It's not locked."

Perhaps she should have put on a shirt before saying that... But truthfully what more damage could she do to him that wasn't already done?

Regardless of whatever it was that he had to say she was certain that the rest of this trip was going to be spent in the most awkward funk imaginable.

[member="Cenric Marus"]

 

[Cenric Marus]

[member="Mariya Pyne"]

The door slid open with a creak, the rusted metal rubbing against itself. Cenric peered inside for a quiet moment, spotting Mariya at the desk. Involuntarily his cheeks colored slightly at her near bare skin, a reaction that he still could not quite help, and one that was aided by what had happened in the refresher. His head shook and slowly he made his way into the room.

For a moment he stood there awkwardly and then motioned to the bed. ”Can I sit?”

He waited a second for Mariya to nod, then slowly sat down on the mattress. Briefly after he closed his eyes, simply taking a breath as he tried to compose his thoughts. He still wasn't entirely sure what he was even going to say to her, or even what he wanted to say. His thoughts were a disorganized mess, and trying to put them all into a row was impossible at this point.

Finally he took a breath, looking over at her as he began. ”We met a little over thirty nine hours ago.”

The math was quite easy.

”In that time I've screamed at you, seen you kill people, fought a Sith, embarrassed myself in front of you half a dozen times in the worst way possible.” Cenric was quietly listing all of their greatest hits. His eyes wandering for a moment. ”Every second we’ve had together has been spent rolling from one disaster to the next.”

Cenric paused. ”But...for whatever reason I can't get you out of my head since I first crashed into you and spilled my caf.”

He took in a breath.

”The card game made it worse. My own stupid mistake too. The Refresher? Yeah.” Slowly the Jedi went quiet. ”I'm not very good at this, but what I'm trying to say is…”

What was he trying to say again? ”Well I have no idea really. This has never happened to me. I've never met anyone like you before.”

 

[Mariya Pyne]

While Cenric talked, stuttering and tripping over his own words Mariya continued to straighten her hair, picking up the device once more and running it through the thick strands of brown. Similarly her chocolate colored eyes looked every so often at the Padawan in the mirror, at least showing that she was paying him some measure of attention while he tried to spit out whatever it was he wanted to say. Though for all the words he used, he didn't actually say much of anything.

He recalled when they met, what happened on the station, and then the rapid decline of normality once they'd arrived on her ship and made it out of the immediate danger of the Sith.

Though where they were heading it was still unknown as to if danger awaited them on Naboo also. At the end of it all, the only thing he said was that he hadn't met someone like her, and she wasn't even certain that was a good thing. He had been mortified of her decisions, decisions that ran entirely counter to his own beliefs, and his Jedi Code. She was his exact opposite in almost everything, and their time spent alone had only exacerbated their differences.

"Okay." She said as she pulled the hot iron through her hair and cast a look towards him, not knowing what else he expected from her in terms of reaction.

[member="Cenric Marus"]

 

[Cenric Marus]

[member="Mariya Pyne"]

He paused for a second, half expecting her to say something more.

When it was obvious that she had nothing else to say Cenric tried to think of how to best word what he wanted to Express. How did people usually do this? Did they just come out and say it? It seemed...awkward to him, but then again that had pretty much been his and Mariya’s entire relationship up until now.

Would probably continue to be after this was done. ”You're opposite me on pretty much everything but…”

He paused.

”I think I like you a lot more than I have any right to.” The Jedi code, his upbringing, pretty much everything said so. ”You're strong, smart, beautiful.”

He stuttered hard through the last words, finding it hard to speak as he turned a strawberry red. ”And despite everything that's happened between us I'd…”

Cenric stammered and then forced himself to continue. ”Very much like...to spend more time with you.”

It was not a euphemism, but genuine sentiment. She could say no of course, he was expecting her to. If she did he would leave her be, as promised. But if she didn't? Cenric had no idea.

 

[Mariya Pyne]

Mariya’s hands slowly came to a stop, releasing the grip the device had on her hair. Craning her neck to the left she looked back at Cenric. At first she hadn’t been certain what his angle was, why he was acting like such a weirdo, and why he was tripping over his words. He was nothing like what she had imagined a Jedi being, though perhaps her sister was simply an extraordinary example of a Jedi, she really didn’t know.

”You’re serious?” She asked with no shortage of perplexion. “Cenric,” Her voice turned to a more soft tone. “I think you might be confusing infatuation with feelings.” Notably due to the multiple times he’d now seen her completely undressed. “Do you remember yesterday at all? The mortified look you had when I killed those imperial troops? The way you condemned me for it? That was genuine, both your feelings for it and my way of life.” Her job was still rather an ugly business, whether he chose to put on his rose colored glasses now or not.

”How can you adhere to whatever Jedi philosophy your master teaches and be with somebody who is arguably a detractor of those teachings that you yourself believe in?”

He wasn’t making any sense. Her hands raised in a questionable gesture, “I lie, kill, and steal. I’m not what you’re looking for.”

[member="Cenric Marus"]

 

[Cenric Marus]

[member="Mariya Pyne"]

"I don't think I'm looking for anything." Cenric stated flatly, though he knew that she had a point.

Everything he had believed up until now had come into question, and he had been beyond furious with her. He remembered those feelings rather well, it was just yesterday after all. The anger hadn't quite gone away yet either, but at the same time he knew that the anger was hypocritical. It had been he who had finished off the Sith, his lightsaber that had stabbed through the man, his hand that had landed the final blow. How was that any different?

"I'm not saying I'm in love you." He wasn't a complete rube. "Despite whatever I am I'm not...I'm not that stupid."

He took a breath. "I find you attractive. I liked seei-" He cut himself off immediately and then began again. "Maybe I am infatuated with you or whatever you want to call it, but the fact that you're opposite me is I think why...I feel the way I do."

Cenric slid his fingers together in an odd sort of nervous gesture. "I've been stuck in this...small world all my life. Listening to stories of glory from my father. Farm girls. The Jedi Temple, even the Rebel Alliance. All of it."

"That station... when you forced me to leave." He paused a moment then went on. "I would have stayed without you. I would have stayed, fought, and then probably died."

That had been why he'd been so angry. He would have given his life and it would have been for nothing. He had done it before back on Mirial and nearly died for his troubles were it not for his master. The last two days had been a complete ride of emotion, highs, lows, and all of them changing within the blink of an eye. It was not something he was used to. "You, your life is opposite mine. It's something I haven't experienced and I think no matter how much I dislike it, I need to experience more."

He frowned, then realized he didn't want her to think he was simply using her. He liked her, genuinely, and it was she that had brought about this idea. "It's just...I'd rather experience it with you than running off to Nar Shaddaa on my own."

 

[Mariya Pyne]

Even cutting himself off Mariya could have finished the sentence for him, knowing precisely what he was going to say. He liked seeing her sans clothes. She knew that already, judging by another reaction of his that had caught her eye the first time he’d seen her. Still, she couldn’t help but let out a small snorted laugh when he started to say and then immediately silence it.

Regardless she was still entirely convinced that the only reason he wanted to spend more time with her specifically was because she had been the only girl in his life to, without a bit of hesitation, undress herself out of little more than the desire to entertain herself at his expense. The girl didn’t judge him because of it, but she felt like his infatuation with her was more of convenience and circumstance than because of her specifically.

“I think that’s a mistake.” She tried to say what had to be said gently. “You’ll get yourself killed following me around, and I don’t really want that on my conscience. You’re a nice enough person so I don’t want to be the one to bury you and have to contact your family.”

Maybe that was a bit too on the nose.

”What I mean is I’m not a Jedi, I can’t help you become one. If anything I’ll make you an even worse one. I can’t help you learn what you need to learn. That’s why you have teachers and those temples. The only things you’ll ever experience with me are very similar to what you saw back on that station. And I don’t think your other Jedi would take kindly to what I do or how I do it.”

The girl smiled and set the straightener down, turning it off and checking her work momentarily in the mirror to ensure her hair was now entirely straight. Mariya then turned and placed her hands on her hips. “But if what you want is something to look at without being scolded like those girls back where you’re from then I can help.”

[member="Cenric Marus"]

 

[Cenric Marus]

[member="Mariya Pyne"]

In the seconds before her last statements came crashing down on him Cenric wanted to speak again. He wanted to tell her that it was exactly those experiences that he wanted, those experiences that he felt he needed. The teachings of the Jedi were well and good, everything that he learned at Cedric's side was important and the knowledge of the Archives was to be valued.

Yet they were not enough.

They were not the reality of the galaxy. They were not what many of the people experienced or really anything close to what he would experience with them. Celanon had been proof of that. All of his teachings, everything that he had learned had been utterly useless. Even when fighting the Sith what he had been taught had all been for absolute naught. In the end it hadn't been his experience as a Jedi that had helped him, it hadn't been the training, it had been fighting Dirty.

It had been Mariya who'd helped him end it. Cenric was worried that as he learned more of the Jedi way and steeped himself deeper within the Order he would simply continue down a path of the small world he had lived all of his life. He was concerned that he wouldn't ever actually be able to help anyone. That in the end he would stand in a position much like had been in on that station, and at that time there would be no Mariya to convince him to leave.

Fear drove him as much as his attraction to Mariya, as much as his desire to learn more, to see the other side.

He wanted to say all that. He wanted to express it to her, but the last few trailing words that the Princess spoke caught him so off guard every single thought drained from his mind. Of all the responses she could have ended with, it was that one he had expected least of all. "Tha-That...I-I...ummm"

Cenric stammered and stumbled.

 

[Mariya Pyne]

Mariya laughed. He was tripping over his words again, brain and lips unable to connect, yet only moments ago he had been just about ready to blurt out how he enjoyed seeing her undressed. Now that she’d actually agreed to give him what he was asking for he had no words for her.

“What’s wrong? I only said what you were thinking about saying to begin with.”

Moving to sit next to the Padawan, though this time not with the intent of making him uncomfortable, she bottled the laughter and spoke in a more serious manner. “It’s the first time you’re on your own and away from the Jedi. I kind of took advantage of that innocence earlier, I wanted to make you feel uncomfortable and awkward. It worked. I know I’m not good for you, not if you want to be a Jedi.”

[member="Cenric Marus"]

 

[Cenric Marus]

[member="Mariya Pyne"]

"I j-just didn't expect you to..." He looked at the floor, then at her. "To offer."

Despite her intent, it was clear that Cenric was still somewhat nervous sitting besides her. He was fully dressed this time, but she was still in little more than her undergarments. That alone was more than he had seen on Celanon, discounting swimwear anyway. "Maybe."

Cenric admitted quietly.

"But." He stopped for a second glancing at her and letting his eyes trail over her slowly before he took a deep, steadying breath. "I don't want to be the kind of Jedi that never flinches. I don't want to be the Jedi dying for nothing. I don't..."

He trailed off. "I don't want to be caught unaware."

Which was exactly what had happened to the Alliance, what had happened to him funnily enough. The attack on Celanon, Mariya playing her little game, both had made him out to be a fool. It had taught a lesson, sure, but not enough of one. Cenric knew that he needed learn more, and he couldn't help but deny that he wanted more of Mariya.

The Padawan looked at her, this time not looking away.

 

[Mariya Pyne]

"I thought it was obvious that I'm not exactly shy about that sort of thing. I'm entirely comfortable with myself. But if that's a no I won't be offended either."

She smiled again, reaching for the shirt on the end table beside him.

"So what kind of Jedi do you want to be then? The only thing I can possibly teach you is how to pull the damn trigger when it's necessary. If you don't want to die for nothing then you'd better learn to abandon that all life is precious philosophy when it could be the difference between yours or theirs. Not everyone can be saved." She meant that both symbolically and literally. In the case of the agents they would have surely killed them had they been given a second opportunity. In the case of the civilians being herded up into the transports they would have both certainly perished undertaking an impossible rescue for nothing. The right course wasn't always the morally righteous course. Cenric still had yet to learn that.

"But if you think there is some secretive way to always be prepared then you're wishing for the impossible. Had I the answer to that, I would have never stopped on Celanon Station."

No, she would have been long gone before that Sith fleet arrived. In fact, she would have never left Naboo and would already know the fate of her home world.

[member="Cenric Marus"]

 

[Cenric Marus]

[member="Mariya Pyne"]

He paused for a second and then very quietly spoke. "It's not a no..."

Cenric was so soft spoken that it if Mariya hadn't been sitting right next to him she might not have heard him. His face immediately turned red, and even though he had nearly admitted it earlier this was the first time he had actually said it outloud. It was clearly hard for the padawan to admit, even harder for him to actually say out loud. He spoke quickly in follow up to her next question, clearly trying to avoid her teasing him about it.

"I just don't want to be so naive." That was the truth of it. "I don't want to be stuck seeing things one way. The Jedi way."

Cenric paused for a second. "My Masters way."

He of course respected Cedric. The man had lifted him out of the Temples and taught him invaluable lessons, but his eyes had been opened now. There were other paths to be taken, some that he had never imagined or even really thought possible. It didn't mean that Cenric was a different man of course, but he wanted to be aware of what else he could be capable of. Most of all he didn't want to fall into the same trap that so many others now had.

"The only way to do that is too..." He shrugged. "...Experience things."

 

[Mariya Pyne]

"No?" The brunette sat quietly for a few moments, shirt in hand, looking at Cenric. A bit of mild amusement played at her lips, though it wasn't one of mockery but one of surprise. Surprise that he had actually manned up and admitted to what he actually desired. It was terribly quiet, and if the engines had so much as hiccuped his voice would have been drowned out, but he said it all the same, even if he then immediately shifted himself towards her other topic of discussion.

"Then how do you propose to go about doing both? Isn't the Jedi Order something of a lifetime commitment?"

Could you just leave? Was that allowed? Were you still a Jedi if you left an Order? Did you have to give back your lightsaber? Mariya had no idea how any of that stuff worked. Jamie didn't belong to any Jedi order, she'd done everything with the help of her friend, the one who always looked angry or sullen and never talked. Aela, she recalled the name. If ever there was a girl who looked like they needed to get laid it was her. But that was neither here nor there.

[member="Cenric Marus"]

 

[Cenric Marus]

[member="Mariya Pyne"]

He slowly, very slowly shook his head, but didn't say anything else.

The topic was one that Cenric wasn't prepared to talk about out loud, at least not without more coaxing. It was hard enough to admit in the first place, and from his perspective he had already taken the leap off the edge of a cliff. Something that even twenty four hours ago had seemed entirely possible.

"I'm a member of the New Jedi Order technically." Though Cenric was his Master, the man wasn't exactly in the Order itself. The Rebel Alliance was more of a gathering of force users, soldiers, and freedom fighters than it was an actual organization. There was no true committiment, just the one he had made to Cedric's training. That itself was flexible enough to accommodate his travel. "If I'm honest...it didn't sound too good for them last I heard."

It was a depressing point to bring on, but they both knew it was true. "The Rebel Alliance isn't really a Jedi Organization, it just has Jedi like my Master in it and it's less...regimented."

He shrugged. If he had thought it impossible he'd never brought it up. His idea hadn't been to constantly be with Mariya, but to join her on one job or another, or show up when she needed him. Though the latter idea had really been more of brief dream than anything else.

 

[Mariya Pyne]

Just how many Jedi Orders there actually were across the galaxy Mariya really didn't know. She knew of the one Cenric was a member of, as that was what her sister's friend had been a part of too. She only knew additionally of the Silver Jedi due to their size. But there were seemingly countless small fractures and splinter groups that operated on their own, or with other rebel types. She wondered for a moment how the Jedi intended to ever defeat the ever expanding Sith forces that claimed so much of the galaxy already.

They seemed far more focused and driven than the Jedi now.

"I see."

Brown eyes looked towards Cenric, a sigh slipping past her lips. "If you really are so set on following me around then I have three rules that are to be followed." She held up her index finger, "One: Don't ever disobey an order I give on this ship or on a job." Her thumb poked up after, "Two: Don't ever use my real name on a job." Her middle finger then raised, "Three: If anyone tries to kill one of us, you pull the trigger." Her eyes displayed a fierceness to them that she was not negotiating on those if he wanted to hang around once they'd reached Naboo.

[member="Cenric Marus"]

 

[Cenric Marus]

[member="Mariya Pyne"]

He considered for a moment.

The rules made sense really. The second in particular. Mariya might not have been as famous as her sister, but she was still someone that was in danger of being taken as a hostage by someone who would want to take advantage of the crown. The first one was...well it was what it was, probably for the better. There were many things that Cenric didn't know, and the idea of following orders didn't really bother him all that much. He did it with the Jedi all the time.

It was the third rule that really was a sticking point for him. He had killed the Sith, yes, but that had been different. The heat of the moment, the brashness of the fight...Cenric wasn't even entirely sure if he could manage it. He frowned for a moment, giving it some thought and then finally deciding he would concede. His reasoning? He used a lightsaber, there was no trigger on that. She would likely not approve of that particular loophole but they would cross that bridge when they got there.

Cenric took a deep breath, then nodded. "Alright."

He had wanted this. He had never expected her to say yes, but he'd wanted it nonetheless.

There was no going back now.

 

[Mariya Pyne]

Truthfully Mariya wanted him to decline. She didn't want to have to worry about him. Her partner had been a smuggler long since before they had met, so they were already well up and up on the risks, but Cenric had only just skimmed the surface of this world. There was so much more he didn't know, and if he thought killing one Sith and two imperial troopers was the worst of it, he was in for a terrible surprise down the road. He couldn't know just how hard this lifestyle was until he lost someone he'd gotten to know, someone on his own side of the fence.

For now though she'd laid the ground rules and he agreed to them, so she shrugged. "Alright then."

Standing up Mariya moved from the bed towards the table where she had been doing her hair, tossing the shirt carelessly off to the side of the room. Her hand briefly tapped against the straightener to ensure that it had cooled down before stowing it back within the drawer of the table and turned back towards the Padawan. "So," She began, reaching behind the center of her back to release the small clasp. The clothing then fell to the floor as it had earlier, leaving behind lightly bronzed, bare skin above the waist, while brown locks of hair teased what hid beneath.

"Suppose I can uphold my end."

[member="Cenric Marus"]

 

[Cenric Marus]

[member="Mariya Pyne"]

For a moment Cenric didn't even see what Mariya had done, instead he focused on the decision that he had just made. Joining Cedric and the Rebel Alliance had been the biggest decision he'd ever made. At the time he'd known it meant fighting, but he had been idealistic, even naive. He'd wanted to stop the Sith, do whatever it took, but Celanon had made him realize he'd never even knew what that really meant.

This?

This would really teach him. At the very least it was what he hoped for. The Galaxy was a far darker place than most Jedi would like to admit. It wasn't just the Sith, it was smugglers, pirates, and even regular citizens that did what they had to survive. Cenric knew that he had to do this if he was ever going to live with himself, knew that he had to learn more than just one side of the equation. A deep breath filled his lungs, and then slowly he let out a long sigh.

"Thank yo-" As Cenric looked up he saw the slip of black cloth fall to the floor, and once again he found himself at a loss for words.

They had talked about it openly, he had agreed and...maybe even asked for it in a way, but for some reason he still hadn't quite believed. The Padawan went quiet, but this time he didn't look away. Instead he waited in silence to see what she would do next.

 

[Mariya Pyne]

This was most definitely not something her sister would approve of, nor her family, nor anyone else for that matter. Luckily, this was her ship in the vast expanse of hyperspace with nobody else but R7 on board and she was certain Cenric would keep his mouth shut once they'd reached Naboo, so she continued. Two soft pops of the buttons released the pants she had on, and using her hands, pulled them past her hips and let them hit the floor. She made a small spectacle of the process, a mild sway of her body and subtle twirl of her arms. It wasn't exactly the most wildly sexy thing the galaxy had ever seen, she wasn't the star of the ball or a Twi'lek dancer for that matter, but she did what she could to make it at least more entertaining than awkward while letting the last of her clothing fall past her feet.

Mariya situated herself a bit further up on the bed than Cenric was sitting, draping her legs gently across his lap. The girl bit down against her lip while she momentarily had a silent discussion with herself as to what to do now. She hadn't quite planned ahead, other than just what she'd done. There was still plenty of time to keep this awkward, stale air going between them if they tried hard enough, but Mariya had had enough of that. If he was going to be spending even more time around her, she wanted all of the awkward funk off the ship as soon as humanly possible. Reaching forward she grabbed the Jedi by the collar of the ragged shirt he'd been wearing for the past couple of days, and the back of his head. Using both as leverage she pulled both herself upwards and him downwards into each other, lips of pale amaranth pressing against his for more than just a few seconds.

[member="Cenric Marus"]