Private The Cycle Renews - Post Coruscant

[Lossa Aureus]

Location: Dawnbreaker Medical Wing, Private Suite
Tags: Zaiya Ceti

-Continued from here-​

The medical staff were as comforting as they could be delivering the news of the past few days.

Lossa had been in what they could only describe as induced coma. Assuring her that they had not taken action to do so on their end. A rendezvous with a private vessel hailing them had brought with it Niki Priddy and the cloned arm she had arranged for, citing the paperwork for the procedure to connect the cloned tissue with her after the birth of her child for the sudden appearance of her left arm.

A strange sensation to have the limb once more having been separated for some time now.

The other news that she held close now the reminder that nothing stayed the same in the galaxy. A knowing in the back of her mind that was affirmed by the words of others about the passing of Romi Jade during the fighting. Her eyes cast down at her swaddled baby, peacefully sleeping for the time being with a full belly, another reminder of the ever changing flow. Wonder setting in as to how her birthday would be received given it was a celebration of new life so quickly after the death of someone so important to the galaxy at large.

Her arms curled around the small figure with a sigh, weakly smiling down at her daughter at the bittersweet knowing.

"Your aunt would have loved to meet you." The smile wobbled, her body relaxing into the elevated bed as a nurse appeared once more. Datapad in hand for the usual checkup as she scanned Zeriana and then Lossa. Scribbling on the screen before placing it against her hip and breaking the soft quiet of the room.

"Would you like to have Zaiya come visit now?"

"Yes. If you would please, send her in." Her hips hurt with trying to adjust herself in the bed. The nurse moving to help before making sure she was comfortable and leaving to bring the girl in.

A tired smile given to Zaiya when she entered. Exhaustion plain on Lossa's face as she spoke with a look over the padawan.

"You doing alright? I uh. That was. A lot."

 

[Zaiya Ceti]

"You may come in now," The nurse relayed to the anxious girl sitting outside. Zaiya jumped up at that, straightening to her feet.

" Okay thank you!" She told her, already moving towards the door and through the threshold with the energy of a teenager needing to confirm if someone was okay. Opal blue eyes would land on Lossa, who still seemed to be regaining her strength, but was awake, conscious, and alive.

"Lossa!!!" Zaiya cried out at Lossa Aureus , the silvery hue of her skin suddenly brightening and shimmering with a pearly, rosy golden sheen, relief painting over her mottled spots and patterns with turquoise hues, their edges glowing with golden bioluminescence.

"I'm okay, don't worry about me!" she exclaimed, rushing to a halt by Zeltron's side. She immediately reached out to try to hold her hand, if possible, without messing up any of the medical lines.

With Zaiya's inability to block her emotions, and if Lossa didn't have her empathic wards up, she'd feel the strength of relief, joy, gratefulness, and concern that would illuminate Zaiya's skin in a kaleidoscopic rush of color. Immediately, the Lovalla teen could feel the exhaustion Lossa felt, not just what she expressed in her expression.

"I am so glad you are okay! How are you feeling?"

 

[Lossa Aureus]

Location: Dawnbreaker Medical Wing, Private Suite
Tags: Zaiya Ceti

Worry and anticipation announced Zaiya's arrival before she heard the padawan speak. Amusement flickering across her own range of emotions at the empathic connection as Lossa reigned in her own ability to share without removing her ability to sense those tangible sensations in the air.

Which allowed her to examine the change in color the girl gave with the excited shout at seeing her. Warmth filled the smile she shared to Zaiya.

"Worrying about others is part of the deal." A slight nod to Zaiya as she offered the new hand. The sensation of touch was still new, and the nerves announced the feeling with alarming clarity.

The swift rush of emotions made Lossa grin, wondering about Zaiya's people and their ways.

"I'm feeling... better." Thinking on her words with another little nod. "Kinda tired but. A lot better, actually."

Glancing down to the sleeping babe in her right arm before looking back to Zaiya. Examining her skin a moment longer before deciding what to bring up first. They still had the topic of boys to cover, along with the empathic abilities the padawan presented, and the strange occurance on the ship to recount. The plethora of options making it a chore to figure out what to cover first until she dove headlong into the toughest one first.

"So." Leaning back to get properly comfortable with a glance to see about a chair for Zaiya. "Bring that chair over and we can circle back to your question about boys. First though. First we should cover the scary thing I did."

 

[Zaiya Ceti]

​

"I'm glad," Zaiya replied with relief, turquoise tones blending over her mottled stripes and spots as she gave a soft smile. When she saw the baby, the glow only intensified as the turquoise blended into a vibrant teal of happiness. "Ohhhh, is that your baby?!"

Children were considered an absolute blessing in Lovalla culture. It was so hard for a mated pair to become pregnant; many things had to line up and be synchronized, but they were truly cherished when a mated pair was blessed.

"So beautiful," She murmured, half whispering, hoping she wouldn't startle the baby. "You are very, very lucky."

However, once Lossa Aureus mentioned grabbing a chair and talking about the scary thing she did, Zaiya's rosy golden skin shifted into a confused dove grey with citrine overtones.

She went to grab a chair anyway and brought it back to sit beside Lossa. "What scary thing?" she asked her, honestly confused. What Lossa didn't realize was that in the chaos of it all, Zaiya hadn't been sure what or who was responsible for the odd little girl who appeared out of nowhere. Then again, there was the weird spirit green lady who also claimed she was some god.

It was too much at the time to process, and Zaiya's main concern was making sure Lossa and her baby were safe.

 

[Lossa Aureus]

Location: Dawnbreaker Medical Wing, Private Suite
Tags: Zaiya Ceti

For as excited as Zaiya was, Zeriana only stirred a little. Eyes scrunching a bit before calming and returning to her peaceful slumber.

"Yes, meet Zeriana. I am very lucky. And thankful. You were brave standing up to Onrai. Reckless, but brave. Thank you." Layering the only critique she had for the padawan between kinder words as she watched the colors shift with each moment.

The way the padawans skin seemed to fluctuate with each tide of emotion gave her all the more context for what she was witnessing. Another thought drifted in as she watched the colors and hues shift and fade into another. Was this how Iris Arani saw the world and the beings that lived in it?

The confusion with the mention of the scary thing was likely lost behind the presence of Onrai, and rather than take the chance to avoid the topic, she pushed onward.

"That smaller being. With the uh, nasty presence. That scary thing. That. That was." Understanding now why she so often had run from her problems before as a sigh escaped her. "That was my doing. Sort of."

Zaiya would be able to detect the hint of confusion Lossa felt even trying to explain.

 

[Zaiya Ceti]

​

There was no helping the sudden influx of heat that rushed over Zaiya's cheeks when Lossa Aureus mentioned that what she did was brave but reckless. Pink would dye her mottled spots and patterns in abashed shame, but the dark orange ripple with the blue glow that went pulsing over her skin resonated her determination at the time to do what she could. She hadn't wanted Lossa or her baby to be hurt. Reckless yes, but what else was she supposed to do in such a situation?

"Well... what else could I have done?" She asked honestly, uncertainty blanching her skin from its rosy golden hue to a silver, her stripes deepening into an amber of contemplation and teenage angst.

Of course, that is when Lossa make it clear what she was referencing. Oh, that other being that had made Zaiya feel icky and slightly nauseated?

"That was you?" Confusion would flash in an array of greys, and Zaiya would cant her head, her brows furrowing in contemplation. Wait, was Lossa like Teresa Zambrano | Darth Pellax ?

"Oh, wait, did you have an amulet that would hide the icky presence?" That's what Teresa had before. "Then that wasn't due to the crazy goddess lady?"

Blinking a bit, she studied Lossa and mulled over it. Zaiya was still new to learning about the various aspects of the Force when it came to the Darkside and the Lightside and what it all meant. So far, she had met another pregnant lady who also felt icky, but she had been nice and didn't feel as if she wanted to harm her. Was Lossa the same way?

Wait, were all pregnant women able to do that and feel icky at the same time? How did they become icky? Was it the father's fault? So many questions raced through Zaiya's head, and she wasn't sure where to start.

"So what was it? I didn't feel it before; the only nasty presence I felt was when the other weird lady came in, and then the icky sensation only worsened when the other being showed up. I thought it was due to the crazy lady some way."

 

[Lossa Aureus]

Location: Dawnbreaker Medical Wing, Private Suite
Tags: Zaiya Ceti

"In that situation? You did what you felt was right, we all were just in over our heads." It was difficult to offer advice when even she didn't know what could have been done in that situation.

With so much already on her mind at the time, and trying to coordinate so many things, Lossa was simply thankful Zaiya was unharmed. As it was, the fluctuations of colors with the ambient emotion the padawan was giving off made it a strange association game as they continued to speak.

The question about an amulet hiding the icky presence made her wonder enough to double back on the question later. For now, she moved forward.

"No amulet, just. Oooh. How do I phrase this. It was made worse by her being there but wasn't caused by her. Made by her I mean."

With how vividly she was displaying her emotions, and projecting them, the Zeltron was suddenly at odds with how best to express the complexity of it all.

"It's a part of me. Guessing the part that-oh." The mental light bulb flashed as she nodded to herself.

"The part of you that breathes without thinking. That acts without thinking, like when you catch yourself from falling. It was my subconscious trying to protect me, and itself, however it could." Even keeping her own emotions tightly bound, bitterness still crept along the surface.

"I. Aha. I have some really polarizing luck at times. It's either really good, or really bad. Anyways. As a kid, like, her age-" Nodding to Zeriana and watching her daughter sleep before continuing. Confusion joining the surface level bitterness. "I was really sick, and I hurt. I couldn't go outside or I'd get even more sick. And I didn't get a whole lot better even after I came to the Jedi. I scared somebody as sweet as you are with how sick I was. Just by crying too hard."

Chewing on her lip to keep herself from the frustrated tears that made the rosy color of her eyes shine.

"And it made me really mad, and sad. But I got really good at not showing it, or feeling it. So nobody would worry about me."

 

[Zaiya Ceti]

​

"A part of you?" Zaiya's confusion drifted across her face in swirling grey tones as she tried to comprehend what Lossa Aureus had just explained about the strange, protective part of herself.

"So... the small being that gave off that disturbing feeling is a part of you? The one that comes out when you need to protect yourself?" Zaiya asked, her curiosity piqued. Did this mean everyone had such a protector within them? Or was this specific to Lossa's species? Perhaps it had something to do with the Force? There were so many questions, and Zaiya wasn't sure which one was appropriate to ask first.

Compassion and empathy became the forefront sensations radiating from the Lovalla teenager. The greys of her confusion melted into burnished bronze, and her expression softened. Zaiya's hand gave Lossa's a comforting squeeze.

"I'm sorry you had to experience that. Are you better now? If not, I can try to help, though I'm still learning how to heal," Zaiya said, her innocence and genuine desire to help shining through, thinking she could hopefully help.

"Either way, it's okay to protect yourself. You don't need to feel bad about that. I didn't feel like you were trying to hurt anyone else, at least not intentionally. It was different from that other time when I felt the icky presence of that man trying to hurt Braze," she continued, still trying to understand the differences in the sensations she felt from others.

"Besides, that other lady really, really made my skin crawl. I didn't trust her at all." A new thought came to her then, sparking her curiosity. Lossa was able to hide it? How?

Curiosity dyed Zaiya's rosy golden skin in patterns of vibrant citrine as she looked at Lossa with renewed interest. How was she able to hide it, then? Wait, could she show me how to do that with my feelings?

 

[Lossa Aureus]

Location: Dawnbreaker Medical Wing, Private Suite
Tags: Zaiya Ceti

"A part of me. An unhealthy part of me." At first agreeing before correcting her own statement. It was probably best if she made it clear at the start rather than backtracking. Pausing as she asked further, Lossa's gaze still caught up on the swirls of color that painted the padawan's skin. It was an interesting sight to be sure, but also highly distracting at times. A thought she kept to herself, hiding it beneath a little amusement.

"I. Erm. How best to put it. I got so scared that, I wasn't making decisions. And that part of me. It. Augh." Chewing on her the inside of her cheek as she tried to figure out the words for it. "I wouldn't call it, protecting me. More like. A cornered womp-rat, trying to keep itself alive."

She really didn't enjoy comparing herself to a beast like that, but it was probably the easiest description she could manage coming down from whatever was still in her system. Fear and anger had ruled that part of her. Buried emotions she had long pushed down and ignored. Allowed to fester into something that might have unleashed itself in a more harmful way if the circumstances had been different. A thought that worried her as she smiled to Zaiya.

"I wouldn't say better, but I'm not hurt. Not physically anyway." If it weren't for the emotional barriers around her mind, she might have wept at the genuine feelings Zaiya was sharing. Instead earning the padawan a sincere squeeze of her hand. A refreshing feeling to have someone care without their own gain. A reminder of how she should act going forward as well.

"Thank you. I'm just glad little me didn't hurt anyone else. And yeah. She was pretty creepy. Better to be cautious of those types, but not mean to them. Some being simply look scary but are sweet. Granted-" Squinting a little at Zaiya as a grin appeared. "You seem to be about the sweetest being I've met yet. At the very least the second sweetest."

Another gentle squeeze of the girls hand had her mind washing the topic away for the moment as her mind circled back around to their conversation before it had been interrupted.

"So. You and your friend need boy help? I'm going out on a limb and guessing you aren't used to beings that aren't... as visibly expressive?" A nod to her skin that had been shifting through their conversation, and seemed a point of development with her people that greatly influenced their ability to communicate if she had to take a guess.

 

[Zaiya Ceti]

​

"Why would it be an unhealthy part of you?" While Zaiya was equally interested in going back to her initial conversation about how one knows if someone like likes you, this one was also an interesting one for the Lovalla teen. Zaiya puckered her brows curiously, bright orange painting its way over her stripes again.

A frown then a thoughtful consideration, "What I... could sense... it wasn't that your little self was.... mean... but more... umm... desperate to make sure whatever the crazy lady was doing stopped." Yes, thinking back, Zaiya recalled that the little girl had told Onrai to get out of her head and leave.

"I don't see it as unhealthy. Anyone in the same circumstances wouldn't want someone in your head doing whatever the crazy lady was doing. And if little you is a little kid... even more so. When we are little we don't know what to do until it is taught to us, and if you were really sick when you were little, and that ... created her... then that makes sense."

Another thought came to mind.

"So... maybe ... don't think of her as being an unhealthy part of you. Everything that you are, good and bad, whatever you feel and how those emotions flow through you... is you. One whole you. " Zaiya let go of Lossa Aureus 's hand to bring them up. She shook her right hand, making a half-moon, then she gestured with her other hand, making another half-moon.

"This is big you. This is little you. " She then brought them together to form a circle. "Halves of a whole that need to be brought together."

"It isn't that she is unhealthy. She just doesn't know what big you knows yet. Maybe... you just need to show her, like a mom would what is good and bad and how she should learn to react to things. " A bright smile would send joyful, colorful blue and golden ombres over Zaiya's skin.

"Just like Zeriana. Guide, show, and teach her. I learned a lot from seeing my mom and dad and feeling what they feel and watching how they did things. But they died when I was nine... so I still do not know how to handle other things until someone teaches me or I figure it out myself."

A bashful exhale then whooshed from Zaiya's lips.

"Granted.... If it try to figure it out by myself, I just might not learn the right way, so it is best to learn form someone who knows how to do it best."

 

[Lossa Aureus]

Location: Dawnbreaker Medical Wing, Private Suite
Tags: Zaiya Ceti

The question made Lossa wince.

"Unhealthy because it-" Eyes shutting tight for a moment as she breathed deep. "The emotions that made it distinct weren't. Augh. I avoided problems, hard choices, ran away from trouble."

She understood a little better why the relationship between a padawan and their master, whether a knight or an actual master, was important and integral to cooperation. While she felt level headed, the genuine innocence had her doubting how truly prepared she was in some departments of her maturity. As much as she felt out of sorts, it was refreshing that things were being asked when she couldn't physically run away.

The whole of Zaiya's explanation was met with varying emotions that showed on Lossa's face. Irritation at the mention of Onrai doing what she did. Relief as her expression softened when Zaiya confirmed once more the little version of herself had not sought to harm another. Confusion as she scrunched her face up as the mention of two halves of herself. Concern as she let her eyes drift in thought at being whole. And serenity at mentioning guiding Zeriana along. Which quickly changed to intense scrutiny at the mention of Zaiya's parents having passed some time ago.

Mentally gauging how old Zaiya was and keeping her in mind for a later discussion with Shan Pavond when she was on her feet once more.

"Mmm. You make some excellent points. I'll have to think on what you've said." There had been someone like Zaiya in her hospital growing up. A kid older than them at the time, probably the same age now as she thought about it as Zaiya. Always comforting others, and the inspiration for Lossa to do the same where she could. A reminder that soft souls could be born, but usually were a product of their environment.

Knowing full well how hardship and trouble tended to shape the young into something more so dangerously quick. It made her worry for the young girl. So easy to speak her mind, but unable to hide her feelings. Lossa's chin rose as her eyes narrowed, before dipping as she leaned forward to share a secret.

"I think you are doing very well, but could use a little help." A smile appearing as Lossa settled back into her bed.

"And figuring out matters of the heart isn't a simple thing. Sometimes it can hurt, or end badly. And sometimes, it can end in happily ever after, or something just as soft or sweet. But you won't know what is the end if you don't pursue it." A slight shrug at the end of her words as she looked to Zaiya with a grin. "So who's the boy?"

 

[Zaiya Ceti]

​

Zaiya beamed as it seemed she might have helped out Lossa Aureus in her own small way. At least, the Lovalla teen hoped so. Half the time, Zaiya often rambled her thoughts without stopping. Aris Noble had to boop her forehead and tell her to stop overthinking when she did that. She was trying to work on it, but it was hard to stop.

Pleasure would flush over Zaiya's rosy golden skin as delight would shimmer in an ombre of teals edged with golden bioluminescence along its edges, a sight that never failed to captivate those around her. At least, until Lossa brought back the conversation regarding Zaiya's original question.

The teal would melt into a faint pink with a drizzle of dove grey tones that would indicate the bashful confusion of it all. Zaiya would give a shy smile and then grinned, curiosity replacing the confusion with vibrant citrine hues as she drew her hands back to bring her palms up to rest her chin on them, using her thighs as a perch for her elbows to hold her up.

"I mean, in general, but I guess if one needs to be specific, my best friend Aris. " Zaiya admitted, thinking back on all the previous conversations with Shan, Colette, Astri, as well as others.

"My kind uses emotive bonds and the color shifting to communicate and find a mate, and once we end up synchronizing hormone cycles and our emotive bonds, mate for life. But because our physiology requires the empathic bonds to be able to find a mate, when others talk about like-likeing others or love as love love, it is a bit confusing."

Zaiya gave a frown, and once again grey would dye her patterns over her skin.

"I mean, Colette said it sounds like I love Aris when I talk about him, because he is very important to me and my best friend. He was my first friend and he told me he wouldn't ever let me feel alone and that he'd do his best to do what he could even if he wasn't a Lovalla so that I wouldn't be lonely. So he lets me hold his hand whenever I like and vice versa and it is nice to be able to cuddle again. I missed doing that after my parents died. Feeling connected to someone and resonating means a lot to me. "

Her colorful head canted to the side.

"But that's just what best friends would normally do, right? Astri thinks that Aris likes-likes me and wants to be my boyfriend because of it, but would he? How would one know if a boy like-likes you... and what does like-like even mean?"

 

[Lossa Aureus]

Location: Dawnbreaker Medical Wing, Private Suite
Tags: Zaiya Ceti

Even being right next to her and examining the changes, it still amazed her how vibrantly the girls emotions could shift so quickly. Or perhaps that was just how it happened for everyone, and Lossa was permitted to experience them with her in such a unique fashion.

Instead of trying to butt in to offer any critique or clarity, she let the words tumble out. From the foreign ways her kind formed bonds, to the way they observed relationships, and even handled friendships. Without the other party present, or being able to observe however, it made things a little difficult. But the name drops were certainly helping her get a clear pictures. Colette and Aris were clearly the Noble kids. Astri was a new name to her, and while it was an important one that had offered perspective for the teen, Lossa wasn't going to center around that name.

Shifting a little as she offered her free hand to Zaiya once more.

"First, you are welcome to hold my hand if it helps you feel better. I know it would help me a little. Hospitals aren't a fun place for me, and you are keeping me excellent company." Centering her own emotions around the quiet calm around them now that Lossa could manage the feeling without having to lie to herself about it.

"Second. While Aris and his family are excellent people that would go out of their way to help anyone and everyone, that kind of offer to make sure you aren't lonely isn't a usual thing made lightly for most beings." A smile forming as she continued. "Unlike you and yours, portions of the beings around us do not have the means to be so freely expressive with their emotions and feelings without having to speak them. And the biggest hang up with words is they can't ever truly convey how one feels. Because of this, other beings can misunderstand what they mean. Especially when someone speaks with hidden intent, such as sarcasm or with humor. But-"

A wider smile shown as warmth and hope spread across Lossa's mind, passing through the empathic bond if Zaiya had taken her hand.

"By the sound of it, Aris has taken quite a liking to you. Hand holding isn't a common thing among most beings in the galaxy that do not have tactile empathic abilities or some other kind of communication. But because of his understanding of the galaxy, and how he perceives it, might not understand how you are feeling because of the difference between your species. Some beings can like someone, as a friend and nothing more. But like-liking someone can mean that they want to know them better and try to stay with them, as in how Valery and Kahlil, like-like each other. Well, I mean. They don't like-like each other now, they love each other. Though at one point they like-liked each other and were dating, which led to them loving one another before they got marrie-" Cutting herself off before she went on a tangent and made herself feel absolutely silly. Assumptions weren't a healthy thing to jump to in her mind but she was already crossing a raging river via rickety bridge being so out of sorts with who she was talking about. Having only met Aris in passing for a birthday party and spying the young Noble child from the door.

Colette though, and Vera, they'd made their impressions.

"I have a question for you, and your feelings for Aris-" Eyes narrowing a little as she tried to gauge the emotions to come. "Because holding someone's hand can mean they like you as a friend and are being nice, or like you as more than just friends. Like dating, but before love-love or being married. Do you want Aris to think about you more than he thinks about anyone?"

 

[Zaiya Ceti]

Lossa Aureus

​

Zaiay took the hand offered and enjoyed the connection she felt with Lossa Aureus . The Lovalla teen was glad that the Zeltron wasn't opposed to physical touch, as others didn't seem to particularly enjoy it. For Zaiya, it allowed her to feel a closer connection, a way to still feel the emotional resonance that she couldn't quite pick up without the color changing of another Lovalla to paint it visually for her.

A bloom of hope and warmth would trickle from Lossa's hand, and Zaiya couldn't help but respond with a quiet and grateful squeeze. The teen hadn't been able to see or hear what was going on with Aris or her other friends yet in the wake of the Battle for Corsucant. Hence, the assurance and warmth Lossa provided right now were very, very helpful. The Lovalla reflected that her iridescent skin would give off a soft golden bioluminescent glow in gratitude.

Everything that Lossa was carefully explaining to her was helping paint a picture and frame it in a new way for Zaiya. Most times, her friends overwhelmed her with information that it only confused her. Braze was one of those friends, and while he meant well, sometimes, too much information gave the opposite effect.

But like-liking someone can mean that they want to know them better and try to stay with them, as in how Valery and Kahlil, like-like each other.

That gave Zaiya a bit of pause, pondering. She will ask Lossa a clarifying question once she was done regarding this, because it seemed that like-liking was no different than wanting to get to know a friend so well that they became a really great friend, best friend perhaps? It was a little harder to understand for Zaiya when the concepts of romance, physical attraction, and the like were not the first items a Lovalla typically would be interested in. They were initially interested in a deep, connection that would naturally bloom into something more once hormones and their bonds would sync in tune before the rest came. That could take months or even years.

Do you want Aris to think about you more than he thinks about anyone?"

However, the girl's main focus turned towards the final question Lossa asked her. Something that prompted a pause, deep amber swatches of color rippling over her facial patterns and arms in contemplation .

Do I want Aris to think about me more than he thinks about others?

Zaiya mulled about this for a second, because for her, while a simple answer, perhaps it wasn't as a whole. "Aris is my best friend... " Zaiya began, thinking, "So, in my mind, because I care about him a lot, I do want him to think about me more than he thinks about others -- but that wouldn't really be a fair thing because he obviously has a closer relationship with his family than he ever would with me." She studied Lossa curiously, the deep amber brightening into a vibrant orange in curiosity, "Is that what you mean?"

For Lovalla, family bonds were so very important; Zaiya wouldn't dream of getting in between those.

"Although if like-likeing someone can mean that you want to get to know them better and try to stay with them, isn't that like just wanting to be really good friends as well? I like Aris. I want to be able to stay with him. I hope he does, too...but I won't force him to. " but was there a difference with her other friends? " I also want to know my other friends better and have them stay in my life, but Aris is more important to me because he was my first friend and he introduced me to so many other wonderful people."

It was such an innocent view of things. The need to build and retain those connections once they were made. It was evident that Zaiya had been desperately trying to find and fill that connection she had with her parents before, the sort that a Lovalla deeply craves and needs to socialize appropriately. Living without resonating with her family was extraordinarily lonely for Lovalla. That she met someone who wouldn't take advantage of it was a blessing to the Force itself; However, it indeed came with its confusing domino effect and unknowns, like how the Force would react within Zaiya as she continued to cultivate such a close connection to Aris, weaving a version of an emotional bond that would mimic her kind.

"Honestly... it all seems so complicated and overwhelming at times trying to figure things out," Zaiya admitted, her voice soft and uncertain. Her patterns faded into slate greys, and her skin shifted from its rosy golden hue to a silvery tone, reflecting the sense of loss and uncertainty filling her. This emotion drifted along their connection to Lossa, who could feel the depth of Zaiya's confusion and longing.

"It is stressful wondering what it all means. I don't want to be alone. I want a family, eventually, but my kind need to build bonds and spend a lot of time together to even start a family. My parents were almost in their fifties before they found each other. Then, it took almost thirty years before they had me. Lovalla seems to be very different from other species, and I wonder if that is why things are just so confusing to me -- like-liking, love-loving, dating, and all of that."

She sighed, her eyes reflecting her inner turmoil. "If someone finds someone they want to be with, I think they are very, very lucky."

Another heavy exhale.

"I just don't know if I'll ever really understand how it all works just because of what I am... Or if I'll be able to have what my parents found in each other."

 

[Lossa Aureus]

Location: Dawnbreaker Medical Wing, Private Suite
Tags: Zaiya Ceti

She'd been making strides in the right direction at first with her initial explanation. The hang up finally arriving with her posed question as she tilted her head a little.

"Aris is my best friend... "

"So, in my mind, because I care about him a lot, I do want him to think about me more than he thinks about others -- but that wouldn't really be a fair thing because he obviously has a closer relationship with his family than he ever would with me."

COLOR=rgb(232, 67, 147)] "Is that what you mean?"[/COLOR]

Turning over the phrasing and feelings that mingled with the words. Her face scrunching up a bit as a thought struck her.

"Family will always have a special bond. At least for most beings in the galaxy. There's probably some species that have little to no strong familial ties like most. But those that keep a deep bond are familial in nature. That bond will always exist if it is made and maintained. However-" Coughing a little to clear her throat before she continued. "What I meant by asking if you wanted him to think of you more than others, was not the same as comparing it to thinking of family but of other friends."

Letting her eyes catch the changes to Zaiya's skin as the girl went on further, unable to keep herself from grinning a little at the stark differences of their people.

"Although if like-likeing someone can mean that you want to get to know them better and try to stay with them, isn't that like just wanting to be really good friends as well? I like Aris. I want to be able to stay with him. I hope he does, too...but I won't force him to. "

" I also want to know my other friends better and have them stay in my life, but Aris is more important to me because he was my first friend and he introduced me to so many other wonderful people."

"Honestly... it all seems so complicated and overwhelming at times trying to figure things out,"

Letting her finish that bit before clarifying further while her legs shifted a little to let her begin slow rock with Zeriana.

"So. You can like your friends. You can have great friends. Best friends. And you can have friends that are like family. But when you like-like someone, that means you don't just want to be friends. You want to be romantic, or have a deeper attraction than just being friends. Which is where dating comes in for most beings. It is a signal to others that two beings are beginning their romantic journey to know each other and grow together. And between you and me, the entire thing is confusing and I grew up with more of it than you have." Lossa herself was almost entirely jaded to the idea of romantic relationships. Having to explain it was an easy enough process with how clinical she could be about it. Zaiya's next words however brought a little scrutiny behind some of what she'd shared as Lossa narrowed her eyes and listened.

Giving Zaiya the space to speak while showing she was hearing her with nods and prompts.

"It is stressful wondering what it all means. I don't want to be alone. I want a family, eventually, but my kind need to build bonds and spend a lot of time together to even start a family. My parents were almost in their fifties before they found each other. Then, it took almost thirty years before they had me. Lovalla seems to be very different from other species, and I wonder if that is why things are just so confusing to me -- like-liking, love-loving, dating, and all of that."

She sighed, her eyes reflecting her inner turmoil. "If someone finds someone they want to be with, I think they are very, very lucky."

"I just don't know if I'll ever really understand how it all works just because of what I am... Or if I'll be able to have what my parents found in each other."

"I'll be honest, I envy that your parents were able to share their time with you to show you how much they loved each other, and you. It gives you a very solid idea of what to look for in your life. What to want for yourself." Clarity from the events on the Ballarat’s bridge kept her from truly feeling any ounce of envy. The sensation of anger sharply diminished for once in her life as she let herself even briefly think on her own childhood.

Now wondering how Zaiya's upbringing was being handled with her parents out of the picture.

"While Lovalla and you might be a different cut of cloth from most of the galaxy, I believe that you will find that same happiness and depth of love. Even if it takes you a little while to find. It's frustrating being thrown into new things. It can also be a burden on the heart and mind to feel like you are alone." Squeezing Zaiya's hand once more and sharing the sensation of pride for the girl along with a hint of whimsy about affection.

"But you won't be alone forever. And if you need someone to hug, or talk to, even just hold your hand, come find me. I might even let you stay at my house if you want. Though I'd have to talk with Shan about it, which. Reminds me." The smile sank a little as she carefully tread into the next subject.

"Are you staying with anyone? Like living with someone I mean? A place besides the temple to call home?"

 

[Zaiya Ceti]

​

It was nice to hold Lossa Aureus 's hand. It felt good. Warm and comforting. It was a similar sort of sensation to what she had with Aris, but not quite. Is that what Lossa was referencing?

"What I meant by asking if you wanted him to think of you more than others, was not the same as comparing it to thinking of family but of other friends."

Do I want Aris to think of me more than other friends? It didn't take but a second to realize that, yes, she did want Aris to think of her more than other friends. Was that such a greedy thing to consider? Was that bad?

Troubled thoughts would paint Zaiya's patterns a bemused ombre of grays and concerned pale yellows. At least until the Zeltorn Knight continued with her soft, warm voice to explain further.

But when you like-like someone, that means you don't just want to be friends. You want to be romantic, or have a deeper attraction than just being friends.

"Oh." The soft word of understanding bloomed within Zaiya's chest, followed by the characteristic flush of heat over the teenager's face as the greys melted into a ripple of pink in mild embarrassment. Zaiya didn't understand why, but it felt a bit embarrassing despite her mind saying it was just a logical progression.

"Then, one just knows at that point? Are there any other clues?" Zaiya asked, wondering because, in her mind, she was still thinking about it from her kind's perspective. "When my kind are attracted to another Lovalla, they show interest by displaying a particular set of color-shifting hues over their skin. How can you tell if others feel the same way then?"

Warmth would spread in the comforting sensation of Lossa conveying that in time, Zaiya will be able to find that sort of partnership and love her parents found. It was just a matter of time. It was nice to hear someone say that. So many doubts and fears of being alone without a connection or a bond that her kind desperately needed had plagued the teen's mind. Getting the affirmation that it was okay to feel confused but that in time she would be able to find that same happiness and depth of love felt so... sooo.. good.

"But you won't be alone forever. And if you need someone to hug, or talk to, even just hold your hand, come find me. I might even let you stay at my house if you want. Though I'd have to talk with Shan about it, which. Reminds me." The smile sank a little as she carefully tread into the next subject.

"Are you staying with anyone? Like living with someone I mean? A place besides the temple to call home?"

"Oh, no. I'm staying on the Prosperity with the other Padawans. Aris, Mahsa, and Ayhan are my dormmates there." As for another place to call home? Not really. Her room was no longer available at the university, and she didn't have a home to return to on Volik.

"I would like to be able to visit you and Zeriana, though!"

 

[Lossa Aureus]

Location: Dawnbreaker Medical Wing, Private Suite
Tags: Zaiya Ceti

Gray it seemed meant trouble of some kind. Worrying thoughts, or in some kind of way trepidation. If it weren't for the silent tasting of emotions she was playing at with the hand holding, she might have been adrift in the meanings behind the show of colors. But gaining an understanding of the range of colors was like examining a rainbow and hoping to pick out every color in between the distinct cuts of light. Maybe she would never completely have the range down, but it was getting easier to navigate the shifts at least.

Watching as the girls face flushed at the realization of her own emotions perhaps?

She kept herself from being invasive, instead letting the thought remain as such. Addressing the next question with her own experiences.

"Some beings in the galaxy are brazen with their feelings. Some are highly reserved. Navigating the difference comes with experience, and while I can say for certain you show signs of leaning towards wanting to be more than friends-" Offering a sly smile to the girl before continuing. "I can't speak for Aris. What I got from him though, is that he is someone who is reserved. Choosing to stay out of the spotlight. So, it might be a little harder to gauge without directly asking him. But he also might feel as conflicted as you do. For different reasons. He is, after all, a Noble."

Being someone of such status likely came with a certain degree of stress to measure up to one's parents. To a line of people that had showcased themselves as stalwart paragons of jedi virtues in one way or another. Forgiveness, patience, acceptance, trust. All very lofty goals to have a child measure up to in her own mind as she let her face settle into serious thought.

"Honestly, I would have to watch Aris to give you a positive answer on how he might respond. But, usually, when someone likes another, they go out of their way to spend time with the one they like. At least without being rude anyway. But what I gather about him, that isn't a definitive answer since he seems the kind to include everyone." Even in the limited time she had spent at the gift party, the son very much seemed like the father, save a little more reserved. Or perhaps he simply hadn't come into his own yet.

It was a difficult thing to figure out with a single interaction though.

Her attention shifted, mulling on the words as Zaiya spoke of visiting herself and Zeriana.

"I would enjoy your company and time very much. And I think Zeriana would enjoy that time also. You are welcome on both Naboo and Jakku. Naboo though is a bit more fun." Adding in a slight nod to far more than just Jedi activities on Naboo if she visited. She wasn't going to mention what kind of estate Zaiya would find when she visited, letting the surprise be just that as she continued on.

"So. Because Lovalla display their emotions on a visible spectrum, with-" Nodding to her skin. "It will be a bit more difficult in some ways to understand the differences in attraction. You come from a species that are pretty up front and honest about what they are feeling and want. While most of the galaxy is so used to deception, or words to show how they are feeling. Even empathy can be faked if a being understands it well enough."

A deep sigh running through her at the thought of special training for Zaiya and how to suggest it to Shan. Or even just checking in on her progress of that kind of training.

"Would you mind if I came to visit you after I get some things sorted?"

 

[Zaiya Ceti]

​

Lossa Aureus was right. Aris Noble was the sort of person who was generally more on the reserved side; the issue was that around her, it didn't seem as if Aris kept to himself or was more reserved. When they spent time together, he would smile, laugh, thoughtfully assist her with her questions, and do his best to do what he could. What Zaiya didn't realize is that by spending time with the Epicanthix, holding hands, and resonating their emotions together along with her colorshifted was helping Aris slowly figure out his own emotions and what he felt about them. His years spent under the tutelage of a droid meant that Aris didn't quite pick up on social cues or understand what was normal to feel and what it meant when he felt them.

Perhaps, by finding each other and growing in their friendship, they were able to learn from one another, and that's why they are best friends now. Why Zaiya felt more connected to Aris because the Force slowly weaved her empathic bonds on the Epicanthix the longer she spent time and felt more emotionally attached to him.

It seemed that ultimately if Zaiya really wanted to know just what she felt for Aris, what that meant, and what he felt for her, she would need to study herself more and ask him outright. He wouldn't lie to her and perhaps, that would clear up the confusion the Lovalla was starting to feel around him.

"Okay, thank you for clearing this for me." Zaiya smiled, the rosy golden color returning to her skin and a contemplative deep amber hue rippling over her mottled spots. Which only brightened more with a shimmer of iridescent tones as she nodded excitedly in confirmation, "Yes, I would love it if you and Zeriana came to visit me!"

There were more questions she wanted to ask, like how empathy could be faked. Or did that mean that people could lie about their emotions? It was such a curious, strange thing. Or where was Jakku? She had been to Naboo before, so it would be nice to visit again. However, Lossa still had to recuperate, and she likely needed to take care of Zeriana some more. Although it was evident on Zaiya's face that she had more questions to ask, she was holding back.

"But, yeah, make sure you and Zeriana are settled first." Zaiya gave the Zeltron's hand a comforting, encouraging squeeze. "Do you want me to get you anything?"

 

[Lossa Aureus]

Location: Dawnbreaker Medical Wing, Private Suite
Tags: Zaiya Ceti

There was a contemplative silence that followed her explanation, watching the colors shift slightly as the words seemed to make sense in some way. Empathy in all forms was a complicated thing. Her own people lived their lives tasting and twisting emotional currents to best suit their needs. Employing their abilities to make what amounted to a resort of sorts for tourists, and giving them the best experience possible. Some of her people even made excellent spies if wielded properly. But that came with it's own troubles given the reputation Zeltron's had.

Which Lossa quite enjoyed using to her own ends at times.

Using the brief time to look over her daughter in silent wonder of how Zeriana would navigate the galaxy. Would she be as confused at some point in her life? Seeking knowledge where she could, or seek someone she trusted? Would her life be far kinder than Lossa's had been? The wonder of those thoughts drawing the edges of her smile down slightly as her eyes examined her daughter. As if etching the little cherub into her memory before turning her attention back to Zaiya.

Worrying for another and intruding on their life in some way wasn't an uncommon thing for the Zeltron.

She'd done much the same to alert another to their siblings allegiance. Something she definitely could have handled better looking back. But the impact of her interference was something out of her hands. Now though, someone in a similar situation that she could actually help with was navigating their way in life. And she could at least offer the girl a little help as needed.

"You are most welcome. And thank you for visiting me." The faded smile returning as she watched the questions remain behind Zaiya's eyes. Kept behind a wall as Zeriana began to stir and fuss. The mitt covered hands pushing against the swaddle as Lossa let her gaze drift slightly. Interruptions were probably something she was going to have to become accustomed to, and her arm was starting to become tingly. The comforting squeeze was met and mirrored back.

"And I will. If there's one thing I'm good at, it's getting settled in new places." A slight chuckle to the end of her words as adjusted a little, elbows pressing against the pillow behind her back. The question of fetching something met with a thoughtful pause.

"My water if you would please. And if you could get the nurse for me, I would appreciate it."

 

[Zaiya Ceti]

​

Lossa Aureus

"Of course!" Zaiya replied, brightening once more in a kaleidoscopic display of joyful blues and turquoise. She released Lossa's hand and got up, flashing a smile before she darted over towards the exit to find the nurse.

There was a pounding in her heart that had nothing to do with anxiety as much as excitement that she had made a new trustworthy friend, and that she was able to help Lossa and Zerianna. It meant that there was someone else she could go to to ask questions and just feel a bit more connected to.

Opal blue eyes caught sight of a Mon Calamari nurse and the teenager flagged her down. Twin large brown eyes would gently land on the Lovalla teen with curiosity, asking, "Yes, how may I help you?"

"Oh, sorry to interrupt, but Knight Aureus would like a nurse to come see her and Zerianna." Zaiya explained, pointing towards Lossa's room.

"Of course," the nurse replied, following Zaiya back towards the room.

"I brought the nurse!" Zaiya exclaimed, smiling broadly, the nurse stepping in behind the girl only to move towards the bed.

"Hello, I am Nurse Bak, how are you and the little one doing?" she asked, while grabbing Lossa's holochart to review.

"Umm... would you like me to stay or leave?" Depending on the answer, Zaiya would likely reach out to get in touch with Shan and find out what is going on and if he would need anything. Otherwise, things were still a little bit crazy in the wake of the Battle of Coruscant. Zaiya was equally worried about her friends as well, and might take the time to try and reach them via holocall if she could.