The Demon Within (Siobhan)

[Cora Passek]

"No, I don't have a problem with that because I trust you, as a person. You've shown me you won't hurt me." To what extent, she wasn't exactly sure. Trusting had never been easy for her with anyone really. Though for some it did come a little more naturally and easily than others.

"And neither one of them are Sith monsters." She shrugged again, "I don't trust many people, Sio and you know that. Outside of you four, no one really and certainly no one who has the Force, outside of that select group. It's taken me years to even trust that many, because the majority that I have in the past have put a knife in my back, both literally and figuratively."

"And what I am supposed to do? Accept that I have this miraculous little power, that has brought me nothing but grief? My parents are gone. My sister, dead. Every fething blood relative I have, dead. Outside of you few, it's been nothing but pain and terror. The very kind of people, the same kind that occupied my mind, took my family away, took my innocence, and set me on a very dark path. Forgive me if I'm just not ready to deal with having that same power, and that same type of knowledge from the same type of being. I'm not ready for that. Certainly not when it feels like an extension of his invasion of my mind."

She sighed heavily, seeming a little calmer now. "Look, I don't mean to be snappy. I don't mean to be angry. Talking about it, makes it real. Painfully so. Reminds me that it wasn't just some terrible dream that I could wake from and forget. It fething hurts, and it's reminders of a past, that I very much want to be behind me."

[member="Siobhan Kerrigan"]

 

[Siobhan Kerrigan]

[member="Cora Passek"]


The blonde's words gave Siobhan pause. While she was persistent, she was not heartless and could see how much the topic was affecting the woman. Sighing slightly, she pulled Cora into a hug.


Maybe Siobhan was just going soft. Or perhaps manifesting a slightly better sense of tact. Perhaps both. "It's alright, dear. I didn't mean to upset you or bring back painful memories. I'm sorry," she placed a kiss on Cora's blonde hair and stroked her back. "Your powers don't make you like Vahri. You're nothing like him."

 

[Cora Passek]

Cora leaned heavily against Siobhan as the woman hugged her. "It's okay." She whispered quietly.

A sigh followed, "They don't. But how I came into these powers, has a hell of a lot to do with Vahri. And as for the knowledge he left me, I don't know if I want to even revisit that." There was one more thing Cora wanted to add. "I may not be exactly like Vahri, but revenge, and a desire for power over those who had hurt me ... That did drive me, much in the way it drove him. And that terrifies me."

[member="Siobhan Kerrigan"]

 

[Siobhan Kerrigan]

[member="Cora Passek"]


Siobhan herself was very power-hungry, but that was probably not the best thing to say! "Yes, but you sought power and revenge against people who hurt you. Monsters. He just wanted to hurt people for the fun of it. Yes, you bad things, innocents died in the crossfire, but he'd have never felt remorse for his actions. Or wondered whether he might be hurting someone. You do. That's the difference," she said.


It made sense...at least to her. "And you're not alone anymore. You got me, Eileithya, even Coryth, whom you really need to meet again by the way."

 

[Cora Passek]

"The things I have done, even before Vahri.... Only a few things were truly what he wanted. A lot of the crimes do rest on my shoulders. At what point am I no longer the victim, and have finally become the monsters I sought to destroy? Where is that line?" That she didn't know. That Cora still was so uncertain of. There were so many innocents. So many lines that already had been crossed.

Cora managed to nod, "Yes, that is true. It doesn't change how much this frightens me. I think it frightens me more, because I am not alone. I've got other people who could easily get caught in the crossfire that I actually give a damn about." Though there was something more to it than just that. Cora was equally afraid of being hurt again. That was one of the many reasons for being so guarded and untrusting of people around her. Some desperate attempt to spare herself some pain.

"And yeah, I guess I do need to see Coryth at some point. Not sure how that's going to play out. It's been a long time." After all it had been a good ten years or more since the two had seen one another.

[member="Siobhan Kerrigan"]

 

[Siobhan Kerrigan]

[member="Cora Passek"]


"Well, I believe in you," Siobhan said very firmly. Even if Cora could not do so, she did. Perhaps it was because she saw a lot of herself in the blonde. "My hands aren't clean either. Even Coryth's aren't. So you're not alone in this. As a matter of fact, sometimes I feel it's my connection to others that keeps me stable and balanced. Prevents me from going one step too far. So don't shut us away." While she spoke, she kept rubbing Cora's back in what was hopefully a soothing pattern.

 

[Cora Passek]

Cora nodded, "I appreciate that. I just, don't want you or anyone else getting hurt on my behalf. It's a good majority of the reasons, beyond betrayal that I've been hesitant to let anyone get close. Because I risk not only myself, I risk them too, and I risk them being used against me as well. Things that I'm not sure I can live with." The blonde leaned forward, resting her head in her hands for a moment. The soft pattern being traced across her back, helped keep her a little more grounded in an otherwise uncomfortable situation.

"I know. I know." She whispered quietly. "I've just kept everyone at arms length for so long. It's hard to let anyone in. I'm not even sure I know how to let someone in and be close to me anymore. I don't want to get hurt anymore." Cora sighed again, "I worry that if I let someone in again, I'll open up ... tell them something that inevitably gets used against me. I can't deal with much more of that in my life." That admission alone was harder than she ever imaged it to be. And for a change she was being more open. Though, she still kept some things so close to her, so guarded. It would just take time.

[member="Siobhan Kerrigan"]

 

[Siobhan Kerrigan]

[member="Cora Passek"]


Siobhan nodded, feeling a bit sad. "I understand, dear. Look, I won't claim we've had the same life, but I've been through similar life. Thought I couldn't trust anyone, that if I let people in they'd just get hurt, so it was better if I kept everyone at arm's length because it was safer that way. Just ended up digging my own hole. It's my attachments that keep me stable and made my life a lot richer. I guess that sounds a bit hollow right now, but still," she said softly. Hopefully she was not coming across as patronising.


"Anyway, I believe in you and you're...kind of already inside here," at that she placed her hand over her heart. She was obviously not in love with Cora - her love life was already complicated enough! - but she definitely cared a lot about the younger woman.

 

[Cora Passek]

Cora exhaled slowly. "I just ... worry. Enough people have suffered because of me. Stars know there are a few that are dead because of me and the situation I inadvertently put them in. And I don't want to be hurt anymore, myself." That was a large part of Cora's problem.

The blonde glanced to Siobhan, as she spoke and rested her hand over her heart. "Really?" She didn't think there had been enough time for that. And it did leave her with another question. "I kind of need to know.... What do you see in me? Because I think ... I think you see something I don't quite see."

[member="Siobhan Kerrigan"]

 

[Siobhan Kerrigan]

[member="Cora Passek"]


"A brave, spirited, kind, beautiful woman who's suffered throughout her life but is still trying to do the right thing. Yes, she did very bad things, perhaps even horrible ones, but she didn't act out of malice. She's fun, courageous, eccentric in a rather cute way and her heart's in the right place. She's trying to pull her way out of the pit she fell into and I really, really want to help her up."


Fondly, Siobhan stroked Cora's hair. "So, yeah, getting me to give up on you is kind of a lost cause, my fallen angel."

 

[Cora Passek]

Cora seemed a bit shocked to hear that from Siobhan. It wasn't how she view herself in the least. Then again, she probably was her own worst critic. Her expression softened. "That may be the kindest thing anyone has ever said to me."

"I just have a hard time seeing all of that myself. I'm glad and flattered that you do. I just feel lost these days. Less alone, but just as lost as when I escaped the Sith in the first place. Feth if I know how to pick up the pieces and put my life back together. Never quite figured that out." She said with a shrug.

[member="Siobhan Kerrigan"]

 

[Siobhan Kerrigan]

[member="Cora Passek"]

Siobhan seemed fated to be Team Mum. That said, she enjoyed being the clan's matriatch, so all was well! "I understand, dear. But you're kind of stuck with me now. There's nothing in your past that will make me give up on you," she promised. Siobhan did not make promises lightly. Hopefully she would be able to live up this one.


"You'll make it, dear. You don't have to climb out of the pit in one go." Talk about the Force and Vahri, who was still locked in his crystal and would hopefully stay there, could wait. Siobhan felt like torturing the bastard a lot.

 

[Cora Passek]

The slightest hint of a chuckle escaped Cora's lips. "I suppose I am." Faint traces of a smile were tugging at the corner of her lips. She leaned back and nuzzled Sio rather sweetly before returning to leaning back against her. "But are you truly aware of my past, Siobhan?" It had to be asked. Though, it was likely that Mirien had given Sio a lengthy dossier. "People have said nearly the same before, and still walked away."

She gently pinched the bridge of her nose, just trying to take in what had been said so far. "That's true. It's just a long way to go from here. Still not sure where to begin. And I'm still not sure how much of my life before now, can actually still stay. So much is changing and so quickly. I mean, it will get figured out eventually. Just feeling a little lost right now is all."

[member="Siobhan Kerrigan"]

 

[Siobhan Kerrigan]

[member="Cora Passek"]


"Am I aware of every building you've blown up or every person you killed? No, but Mirien gave me a dossier and I know you talked to Eileithya. She didn't tell me what you told her, I didn't pry, but she saw enough in you to keep carrying your torch after you spilled the beans to her, and she's a better person than I," Siobhan said frankly. "Besides, I'm not most people."


She stroked once more over Cora's hair, then planted a kiss on the woman's lips. "Take it step by step, darling. Every day as it is. Like, what do you want to do now? Right this moment."

 

[Cora Passek]

Cora blinked, not exactly the answer she had been expecting. "Mirien, eh? So, that little snake really did have some serious intelligence contacts." The sharpness, might have a bit to do with the blonde still being a little sore about the fact the former Inquisitor shot her. Even if it was a stun bolt, it still counted! She slowly shook her head, a little uneasy with what information Mirien might have handed over to Sio. Though, it did say a lot that Siobhan was still sitting here and hadn't tried to kill her yet. "Yeah, long talk between she and I. But you're right. You aren't most people. You haven't run away from me, yet. Which gives me some small bit of hope."

The kiss gave her pause. It still came to her as strange that anyone could know so much about her life and still care for her. Still not want her dead. But the women in her life kept proving that they did. That they weren't going to run away from her, or intentionally harm her. "Right now, I don't know. I think, I just want to lay here a little longer. Maybe a massage?" She asked sweetly, certainly wanting and needing the attention.

[member="Siobhan Kerrigan"]

 

[Siobhan Kerrigan]

[member="Cora Passek"]


You two really need to sort things out, Siobhan decided for herself. Whether Cora wanted or not! "She's not that bad, you know. You'd still be time-sharing with Vahri without her," Siobhan insisted. However, she still kissed the beautiful blonde, hugging her close. "I can handle a massage. Strip off your shirt and I'll get the massage oil."


Yes, Siobhan was actually going to do it herself rather than delegate it to a servant girl. Undoubtedly the more conservative Mistresses would be aghast at the idea of servicing a pet. But while Siobhan demanded a high degree of devotion, in some ways she was more egalitarian than most. It was probably one of the reasons why she was quite popular among her girls and they put up with her tempestuous moods!

 

[Cora Passek]

"She shot me." Cora grumbled, clearly not happy about that. "And while I realize I would be still stuck with that .... thing... She didn't have to shoot me. Surely, the woman had other options. Like, I don't know .... talking to me?" It may not have been the most logical of arguments but it was what the blonde chose to run with.

Cora returned the kiss, and soon enough stripped away her shirt. "Thank you, Mistress. I just want to spend some time with you, to relax without worry or stresses. Just want to forget all the crap that's happened of late. " It seemed the perfect idea to her in that moment, to just let all the things that worried and frightened her about Vahri and the aftermath he left behind fade away. Just for a little while.

[member="Siobhan Kerrigan"]

 

[Siobhan Kerrigan]

[member="Cora Passek"]


"To be fair, dear, I don't think you'd have taken it well, if she'd said 'Hi, I know you have a Sith spirit in your head. But don't worry, we can remove him! It'll just hurt a lot'," Siobhan pointed out, though her tone was rather soft since it was not intended to be a rebuke. Yeah, she'd totally gone soft since becoming a mother.


"Mirien's very nice when you get to know her better. Just not the trusting type. Bit like a lovely blonde I know." No, she was not trolling at all. Regardless, she got out the massage oil and, after Cora had presumably spread out on the bed, began applying it to her back.


"No problem, dear. I love taking care of my girls," at that she bent down to plant kisses on one of Cora's shoulderblade, then the other. Her very nimble fingers danced over Cora's back, gently soothing while her lips applied kisses. As vain as she was, Siobhan did enjoy fawning over her girls and so none of her touches were rushed. Instead she treated the woman as someone precious. Cora could look forward to a full-body massaage. Have no fear, kiddies, a black curtain would magically descend before Siobhan got around to stimulating the woman's breasts. "And I love spending time with you, darling."

 

[Cora Passek]

"I may not have, but it would have been preferable to what happened." Cora shrugged. The events were in her past and there would be no changing them now.

Cora lifted a brow. "Mirien? Nice? Not from what I know of her." A slight chuckle did escape her lips. "Perhaps that's true."

With a sigh, Cora spread out across the bed and waited patiently for Siobhan to join her. A soft purr escaped her lips as her favorite redhead began to apply the oil to her back. "I'm so glad you do. So very glad." She said quietly as she closed her eyes, and at last finally started to relax a little. The blonde shifted lightly against Siobhan's kisses, thoroughly enjoying the woman's touch.

And here the black curtain would magically descend to keep the kiddies from seeing anything they shouldn't. After all, we can't corrupt the little ones!

[member="Siobhan Kerrigan"]

 

[Siobhan Kerrigan]

[member="Cora Passek"]


Siobhan chuckled slightly, then leaned forward to lick across Cora's ear. "You'd be surprised. Between you and me, Mirien loves orchids and corny romance novels," she whispered conspiratorially. Of course, she left out the fact that the aforementioned novels were her own!


She kept up her ministrations, trying to draw out the loveliest sounds and most delightful pleasure from Cora as her fingers danced over back. After all she had been through, the woman deserved a few moments where she could forget her anxieties about the demons of her past. "I'm very happy you came into my life, darling. Never doubt that. I'll show you just how much."


And then, well, the black curtain descended upon them to preserve the innocence of the kiddies. One might add that the kiddies in question would have no difficulty stumbling upon smut on the 'net. Anyhow, things seemed to be looking up for Cora. It had been an arduous journey with many trials and tribulations, but now that she was free of Vahri, she had a second chance.