The Final Problem

[NightSister]

[media]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FywSzjRq0e4[/media]​

​

Aria Vale was no stranger to pain.

Of course she wasn't. To be human was to hurt. To live in such a broken galaxy - to represent the weaker of two opposing forces - was, inevitably, to hurt. To have loved and lost, betrayed and been betrayed, bent and broken at every corner; pain was as familiar as anything. But even still, it wasn't something you ever became used to, or at least Aria hadn't. Having dealt with a great deal of pain hadn't caused her to build up an immunity - she doubted that anyone who'd seen her at a low point would even think to describe her as being in control of her pain. She wasn't, and she didn't want to be.

She had ceased to fear pain, though. It was nearing five years now that she'd been forced to mask the pain with a false smile and carry on - told that it would disappear if she could just pretend it wasn't there. Aria knew better now, and she wouldn't make the same mistakes again. From now on, if she was sad, she would be sad. If she was angry, she would be angry. If she hurt? She would lie as the weight of her pain crushed her, let it burn out of its own accord, and then her happiness, her strength, if they came, they would be real. Maybe she'd be better off for it, maybe not. It made no difference; Aria was sick of hiding everything she felt to create a false peace. Pain was no exception.

And today, she welcomed it. It was both a strategic and emotionally fuelled move: she'd gone out of her way to feel nothing for years, and so she needed a chance to feel everything, no restrictions in place. But Aria was, essentially, seeking closure as well. If she didn't allow the chance to hurt over what she'd left behind, there was a chance she'd want it back. She could let the pain drown her until it couldn't, and then she'd be done with the Jedi, never looking back. That was, she supposed, the logical element - in truth however, she mostly just wanted the chance to fully experience what she'd been denied as a Jedi. Revisit old wounds, count her losses. There were plenty, after all.

~

Leaves rustled, birds sang. A light rain fell on merrily dancing blades of grass. In a twisted irony, she could almost have been back on Voss instead of resting in a clearing on Khar Shian. She wasn't, of course. Does that make you sad? It did, amazingly. Not sad enough, of course, but still sad. Truly, nothing specific to her Jedi lifestyle was making her all that nostalgic. It was little images and scenarios, routines she'd gotten used to, that were totally unexciting to anyone else, but to her mind, they could only be tied to her days with the Order of the Silver Jedi. Waking up early, meditating in the crisp morning air. Reading late into the night even when she knew she had training first thing in the morning - especially then - as stars twinkled from between her shutters. Mere images, but they floated through her mind incessantly; Aria was a creature of habit, after all. She would miss the comfort of her simple, emotionless life.

There were more meaningful things to think about too, but those had little to do with the Order at all. Both times she'd reached a crossroads, either path meant sacrificing things that meant a lot to her. Some things she hadn't even lost through her own actions, but plenty she had. To list them chronologically: her parents. Her moral integrity. Connor Harrison. Then her friends, her lifestyle and her promise, she had abandoned in one fell swoop. Her parents she missed, but they had died years ago. They couldn't do much to affect her thoughts now, besides fleeting sensations of guilt. Her morality - well, that was meaningless in the scheme of things anyway. Her friends - were they her friends? Between six months ago and today, she'd been at her lowest, and nobody who had noticed had cared enough to offer help. Her lifestyle she'd grow out of, routines could change. Her promise she couldn't shy away from; she had failed. Now she couldn't go back - its weight had been permanently removed - and that was more freeing than perhaps it ought to be. Connor she still missed desperately, but they'd both made their choices and he, at least, had been true to his word: since Drongar, she'd not seen but a glimpse of him, not heard but a word. It was his fault - or at least, it had become so with the help of Silara - and so once she was done mourning properly, his memory wouldn't trouble her. Not much, anyway.

The rain got heavier.

Aria sighed.

[member="Connor Harrison"]

 

[Connor Harrison]

Connor Harrison was no stranger to being alone.

It would have been so easy to return to Grandmaster - former Grandmaster - Thurion Heavenshield and beg for another chance, and the old sop would grant it. Connor literally had gotten away with murder there, and he could do it again if he tucked the tail between his legs and came back with a plea to be a better person. Then he'd have his quarters back, he'd hold a rank, have a squadron to command, a secret cell of Shadows to lead and a general sense of purpose. He'd thrown all that away the second he launched a personal war against Thurion and attacked his namesake.

Now, Connor was out on his own with the clothes on his back, a bag of provisions, his saber and ship and a head as twisted and broken as they come. From Rogue Jedi Master to simply...nothing. A warrior tainted by the darkness and seeking his place in a galaxy on the edge. But not just seeking his place, seeking the one he missed; Aria Vale, his former apprentice who held so much untapped potential until she went AWOL and he parted Voss.

It was a time of celebration for the galaxy at this time of year. Connor felt like celebrating was the last thing he wanted to do.

Before the word reached the edges of Silver space that Connor no longer held position or authority in the Order, he had time to keep a few of the outposts tapped for the missing Knight. Making his final call, it had been noted Aria's vessel had stayed not too far from their jurisdiction and headed to the Sith world of Khar Shian. That was all Connor took before leaving.

Khar Shian, a world surrounded by the Dark Side and one he fully expected was under the influence of Darth Vitium; Silara. Aria's latest obsession. Knowing Silara, Connor would most likely be too late.

- - - - - - - -​

The rain was heavy on the ice world. However, pockets were akin to bloom at times with the right temperature and climate. His ship had made a good number of passes around the planet, lights beaming through the rain. Connor peered out as the washers kept the rain at bay as it lashed down on the viewport.

A thousand thoughts raced through the Master's mind as he searched for the last known area that Aria has been clocked in at before her signal went dead. The terrain was grassy in this sector, and he was low enough to avoid any potential patrols but high enough to see a good view where he passed. Drongar was the last time he'd seen the girl, and since then they had parted on awful terms. It had been rocky for both, but Connor had nothing but admiration and desire for the Knight who he desperatly wanted on side instead of being wasted in an Order as weak and boring as the Silver Jedi. Run by blind fools and populated by do-gooders. Aria was none of those, and nor was Connor. The two could have changed the entire Order had he managed to keep her on Voss. But his attitude and his confusion had taken over. Made things complicated. Made things personal.

She probably had more than he right now. There was nowhere he could take her, no place to call safe bar his ship. If he lost her now, he'd lose his first and main prize in this first step towards embracing his future.

Leaning forward through the rain, Connor slowed down and weaved above the clearings and rolling fields, noting the moutnain ranges in the distance.

"Aria. Give me a sign. Let me know you're here," he whispered.

He'd search all day and night if he had to as he made it to her last known coordinates.

[member="Aria Vale"]

 

[NightSister]

The signal was faint, but the familiarity of the Force-aura amplified it a million times.

By the time it reached Aria, it was all she could focus on.

It was him.

She wasn't even sure what was being said. It was a message, but she couldn't make it out further than his glaringly clear Force-presence. But it was him, and he was here. Her breathing quickened and her heartbeat thudded loudly in her chest, even as she tried to stop herself. Not too long ago, she would've gone into full panic-mode, but she knew how to feel emotions better now. A little bit, anyway. It would take a long time to fully erase the aftermath of the Jedi teachings.

So what to feel, then? Of course she was angry. Of course she was confused. What else, though? Afraid, she supposed, just a little bit. Regardless of whether it would be directed towards her, Connor was dangerous. Aria didn't want to think he'd come to Khar Shian to hurt her - truly, it was quite unlikely - but it was still possible. But that wasn't it - that wasn't what was nagging at her. Something a bit like happiness, perhaps. Hopeful - was she hopeful? That couldn't be it - couldn't it? No, of course not. Fine, maybe it was. Mostly confused, though. How had he found her? She thought he'd left the Order months ago. He couldn't possibly have located her without their resources, could he? Why was he even looking for her? Confusing bastard.

And what to do? Aria did at least have the luxury of planning her move undisturbed and unpressed for time, but even that was only under the assumption that if she did nothing, he wouldn't find her, and that was rather a stretch in itself. She knew that she wouldn't do that - even if today hadn't been set aside for seeking closure, she'd never forgive herself for not tying up this particular loose end - but she wanted to decide what she'd do while she didn't have a time limit. Silara would've had her ignore him and proceed as normal, possibly attacking if that failed to send the message. Connor himself might've even gone straight for the latter. Of course, it would help if she had some idea of who he was now, what his goal was. What did he want? What did she want?

She sat upright, ripping a handful of grass from the ground and crushing it between her fingers in frustration. What did it matter what he wanted? Her future was only up to him if Aria let it be. He'd lost that right when he'd turned his back on the Order. She'd renounced the Jedi because she'd had enough of feeling lost and helpless and weak - if she allowed that to continue now that she was no longer part of the Order, then that would be all she was.

Weak.

Pushing wet strands of hair from her forehead, Aria rose to her feet, looking around. She could sense him, but her ability to track through the Force wasn't anywhere near refined enough to aid her. Fine then. She'd do it herself. Okay. Alright. Just a moment. Hand extended, Aria used a wave of energy to slam a rock into a thick tree trunk, because it felt good and she needed to be sure that she hadn't lost her connection to the Force within the last few minutes, and then she focused. She still couldn't pinpoint him exactly, but she could narrow it enough to accomplish her next task. A single word sliced through the Force, shaky but impossible to miss -

Connor.

[member="Connor Harrison"]

 

[Connor Harrison]

The beams of light pierced through the gloom as the rain bucketed down harder. The sound was comforting as the ship hovered above the ground. It was the sixth time Connor had come down to hover and wait, to feel - to think - to reach out.

It was then she whispered.

Connor

Looking out at the terrain, Connor didn't flinch at the voice inside his head. It wasn't welcoming, yet it was. It wasn't hopeful, yet it was. Connor reached up and drew his hands down his face, finger just touching upon the eye wound. He let out a sigh, for he knew he was too late. The voice was that of one broken, betrayed and corrupt. While Connor had yet to fully embrace his calling on his own time, he had seen it time and time before the effects of what happened to those not ready. It destroyed them. Fingers clenched into fists and he hit the side of the cockpit in frustration; he had been too late.

He set the ship moving forward through the rain a little more, for she was close but not exactly making it clear where. An open clearing was the first point free to set down the ship, and with no evident sign of life, he took it down.

- - - - - - - -​

The rain was almost warm on his face, the soft wind blew his crimson cowl out behind as he stepped down onto the soggy ground. Rain didn't bother him; it was the Force itself. Nature, in its purest form. Connor lowered his head slightly and started off out into the foreign planet. There was an uncomfortable feeling that he'd been here before, in another time. It was familiar of Voss and those planets that he'd help liberate and free over the years. For what? To be alone. But then, this Jedi....ex Jedi....was used to being alone.

"Aria!" Connor called out.

Let those come to him if they wanted, he wasn't afraid to fight back or do what he had to. There was no code to uphold. No Order to represent. Nothing to protect except himself and Aria Vale.

There was a lot to make up for. A lot to explain. Since leaving Dongar, Connor had taken a journey as much as Aria had, but he never wanted to do it alone. The biggest problem was how to convince himself and others of his own morality whilst under the Silver Jedi name. He'd been stubborn, confused and an imbecile. But now he knew what was important and what price had been paid to feel freedom such as this.

Above, a low rumble echoed far in the distance as he pushed back to floppy wet fringe that fell over his face as he trudged on. The weather was a small price to pay to seek her out, for she WAS here, and he wasn't going to leave without her.

[member="Aria Vale"]

 

[NightSister]

Aria wasn't sure how long the silence lasted. Not long, certainly - not to anyone else, at least. Neck on the line, her seconds were minutes and her minutes were hours as time ticked by in unbearable quiet. There came a fleeting, awful moment where she had to wonder if she'd imagined him altogether - if she'd summoned memories so strong that to her vulnerable mind they felt like reality.

Then she heard his voice. Not a memory, not the Force: Connor. Panicking again, Aria whirled around - he wasn't far away. Doubtless he'd be able to find her from where he was. And then...what? Enough had happened - thanks to her, thanks to him, thanks to fate - that now, within potentially a matter of minutes, she'd come face to face with him again: at some point within those minutes, she'd have to figure out what to do. But where to start? She had more questions than twenty hands could count, and less patience than it would take to get him to answer even one. But she did want answers. There was a chance that she'd want to get a lot of anger off her chest first, but then she wanted answers. Where was he? Couldn't he just show up, so Aria could stop overthinking things and just figure out how to react? She could take up the search herself, of course, but that seemed a bit unfair.

In all fairness, Aria tried to wait.

She tried very hard.

She'd never been the patient sort.

Closing her eyes, she tried to get something, anything - an amplified sound, a general tug in one direction, something that could help her, even a little. He was hard to keep track of: either because of how unstable Aria's attempts were or because he kept moving faster than she could keep up with. It took a while, but the imaginary compass in her mind finally pointed her one direction, and she set off through the trees, the gaze of her gunmetal eyes darting around like a spider as they sought him out. Thoughts flew threw her mind without ceasing, all fighting to make Aria falter - take flight, question how best to react, question how he would react. She just had so many questions, so many doubts.

She herself, of course, had plenty to answer for. Though her change in the Force was yet to take visible or tangible shape, somebody who knew her well would spot the change easily. Aria's posture had changed, her voice had a bitter edge to it. Even her eyes, still untainted by the yellow that told of the Dark Side, held all her pain, all her fatigue, all her spite. Even without the clear difference in how she held herself, through nothing but logic it was easy enough to figure out that Aria was no longer a Jedi. Connor would certainly have something to say about that. Fine, she'd talk - if he talked first.

The neverending blanket of green was interrupted: Aria's gaze fell on the familiar cloaked figure, now less than a yard away, head turned in a different direction.

Beneath her foot, a twig snapped loudly.

[member="Connor Harrison"]

 

[Connor Harrison]

How long had he stood there? Minutes, but it felt like hours. Standing in the rain, eyes closed, like a beacon of the Force for those who needed to find him. Aria Vale found him. The snapping twig signalled her tentative, yet careless, effort to be quiet. A native hunter or animal would have been less heavy footed. Connor didn't jump or flinch to spin around. He just stayed there, his head lowering a little.

"A little more training and you've be the perfect Shadow."

He let the rain drown out the silence for a moment more, before he turned to face his former apprentice.

Straight away he noticed a change in her posture, her stance and her aura. She wasn't the same as she had been on Drongar, or even Voss. This was a woman tainted by the darkness in a way Connor couldn't administer.

"I've come for you Aria. No more skirting the issue. My time with the Silver Jedi is done. Through. Rank is stripped and my leadership gone." He walked to her slowly, unsure of how far she had fallen so soon. "Are you ok? What are you doing here alone?"

[member="Aria Vale"]

 

[NightSister]

For just a second, her brain stopped working. Aria had hardly been trying to be quiet, but she really could've done with an extra minute or two to get it together before he noticed her. Caught off guard by his words, yet another burst of panic froze her in place momentarily before she could calm down and attempt to make sense of the situation.

His change in the Force would've been as subtle as her own had Aria not already known that he'd abandoned the Light. That was what made it worse - he was still Connor. Had he transformed into a visibly corrupted creature of evil, as painful as that would be, it would be so much easier to act upon. Instead? Aria was just so confused. Like always. She was beginning to think that extreme confusion was her permanent state.

The perfect Shadow? Aria almost laughed, but not at Connor. The words were a reminder of what her goal had once been - all that time ago, when her conviction had been towards the Jedi - and in the most spiteful way imaginable, it was actually quite amusing. The corners of her mouth twitched, as though she'd been about to smirk or deliver a cutting remark, but then he spoke again.

So he'd finally stopped play-acting. Stripped of his rank, even. So the Council had found out. Or perhaps he had told somebody. It didn't make an awful lot of difference. He was here now, and that was...damn it, she still wasn't sure.

"What am I doing here?" He was right there, just a metre away, but her voice didn't waver. "Connor, what are you doing here?"

Aria took a step to close the distance, arms out as though ready to hug him. Then she changed her mind. Her fist balled up a second away. And then went straight for his jaw.

"What do you want?"

[member="Connor Harrison"]

 

[Connor Harrison]

Her face changed numerous times in the few seconds he spoke to her.

Eyes narrowed, but fell with a cross of pity and confusion. Her stance went stiff, but then slumped a little. Her mouth, twitching and fighting not to say the wrong - or right - things. She moved closer after speaking, and he was prepared for her outburst, that was to be expected. He had, after all, left her without explanation as to why he left. But, then he hadn't left the Order as such. There was many things he had to be sorry for - question is, was he really sorry at all.

About to speak and dare flash a bemused grin, Connor moved a step forward to greet her, but walked into the balled fist she threw instead of a hug. It stung immediately, on the same side that Thurion had recently clocked him one. With a jolt of the head, Connor grunted and was...shocked, actually! A square hit in the face - did he think he deserved less or more? Rubbing the jaw and running his tongue inside, he turned back to her, fire in those eyes.

"Alright I guess I deserved that one."

Spitting to the side what was either a bit of blood or simply rain water, he rubbed it again and looked up at her.

"I want you, of course. I always have. But now it seems she beat me to it." Connor looked to the side for a second, hoping it was just the two of them. "I'm not here to fight you. I'm here to say sorry, not because I feel bad for what I did, but because I let you go when I shouldn't. You deserved more."

He pushed his tongue into the throbbing side of his jaw discreetly.

[member="Aria Vale"]

 

[NightSister]

Okay. That was a bit better.

Her knuckles stung - alright, so she might've put rather a lot of force into it - but Aria ignored it. Violence was very atypical of her, even without the Jedi codes holding her back, but in all honesty, that had been rather satisfying.

She wasn't sure what she'd expected his reaction to be. After all, Aria very rarely punched people, and she hadn't the first clue who Connor had become in the months since she'd last seen him. She wasn't even certain who she'd become since then, not that he needed to know that. When no counterattack came, Aria unclenched her fingers slowly, hand dropping to her side with some hesitance. Alright, so he wasn't there for a fight. That was something, at least.

As ever, Aria listened as he spoke, eyes blazing but voice quiet. She? Oh, of course. He'd found her on Khar Shian: he'd have guessed about Silara. Well, he was wrong. Silara didn't have her. Did she? Why were they even talking about her? Ugh.

"You didn't let me go, Connor." Now, her expression came much closer to a glare. "I said no. Because I don't understand who you are. I still don't!"

Voice rising, Aria fought to avoid letting her emotions get out of hand. It was her instinct to repress emotion thanks to the Jedi, but she wasn't trying to do that this time - just avoid doing something she'd regret. One punch was enough, she reckoned.

"So what - are you a Sith now? What are you? Just tell me!"

[member="Connor Harrison"]

 

[Connor Harrison]

For a second, Connor wanted to give Aria a wonderful back-hand slap across the face. Granted, she was confused and annoyed, but she was getting all delirious and shouty. From that meek youth wanting to be a Shadow to now a Knight throwing punches and shouting him down. Connor wasn't going to take many more free hits, as he wasn't representing the faith of anyone except himself.

"I'm me," he called over the rain, "and that's enough. Not Jedi. Not Sith. Not anymore. I'm embracing the Dark Side away from the Light if that helps."

It wasn't a perfect answer, but this wasn't a perfect situation. Connor wasn't a Jedi, nor was he Sith. What the hell was he?

"All I know right now is the Silver Jedi have cast me out because I stood for what I believe, and only now can I truly see how weak the Jedi are as both people and warriors. I'm beyond their lies now. I know you are too. And what the hell are you nowadays anyway?"

He was closer to her now, and putting more authority in his voice than pleading question and he looked at her sodden face through the rain - if there were tears, they'd be perfectly masked.

"Last time I saw you, you were preaching to me how ridiculous I was as I struggled to make my final play in the Order. And now you're standing here riddled with corruption and darkness. So what are YOU, Aria?"

[member="Aria Vale"]

 

[NightSister]

He never changed, did he? Not a Jedi, not a Sith. Stuck somewhere in the twilight. Unreadable and secretive, aggravatingly stubborn. Able to confuse and conflict her to no end. Aria didn't know much about who he was behind the Jedi façade, but what she did know stayed constant throughout. Perhaps one day, she'd even understand him.

She'd changed, though. Strange as it was, she had been a Jedi, at one point in her life. Dilligent and quiet, afraid of stepping out of line. It wasn't a bad life, either, until you realised what you were missing out on. She wasn't sure what she was now. Not a Sith, not even really a Darksider, as far as she was concerned. Her goal wasn't to chase the Darkness - not even to run away from the Light. Just from the Jedi.

Really, nearly all of her anger was towards the Jedi. She was still angry with Connor, of course; but the Jedi, she despised. Pitied. It was just his bad luck that he'd shown up just as she began to allow herself to be angry, that all the extra anger got pinned on him.

Now he wanted to know what she'd become. Now he looked almost dangerous again. Aria met his eyes, hers unblinking and angry as she tried to figure him out.

And she laughed.

Not a kind laugh, either. Not a laugh shared between friends, not one that suggested they held any close bond. It was mocking and empty and almost malicious; it wasn't forced, either.

"No, Connor. You're the one who's riddled with corruption and Darkness. I'm - you know what? I don't know what I am. I don't care. I just got tired of being nothing. You're the one who's got nothing now."

[member="Connor Harrison"]

 

[Connor Harrison]

It was no use trying to sweet-talk the girl. She needed to remember her place in the great scheme of things, and to remember just what he was to her. Her tone was laced with that disgusting mockery Connor had heard too often. At one time it would have quietly eaten away at his pride, but now it was just down right rude.

"You were tired of being nothing and now you stand here before me saying you don't even know what you are? Miss Vale, I'd take a long, hard look in the mirror before you start to place yourself on a pedestal." He didn't walk to her, for they were quite close enough, but he matched her gaze as fiercely as the rain came down. "I've already had to pick up the pieces of the relationships you broke when you vanished from the Silver Jedi, and you say I've got nothing? I've got you right where I want you. I have everything you're yet to have. Control. I knew how to find you. I told you the name of the Sith Lord you'd so predictably follow. I watched your ego flare on Drongar and on Voss numerous times. You vanished with a glowing ember and I've found you with a small fire."

The rain was soothing. It drenched the pair, but they didn't care at all. Connor held his arms wide, his turn to mock the Knight.

"I may not have nothing, but I know what I am and what I want. I am going to take apart the failing Jedi code piece by piece. I want you by my side as I do it, and to oversee a stable empire that thrives on how we take action and not just talk about it."

His arms dropped.

"How is Silara these days. Has she pulled your mind into the darkest recesses of her own yet? Whispered promises into your ear and given you glimpses of what you could become if you submit to her?"

[member="Aria Vale"]

 

[NightSister]

"You're forgetting something." Control - what a funny concept. Connor thought it was his in this situation; Aria wasn't so sure. "It's not me who's trying to prove anything here. It's not me trying to get you on my side."

This was definitely risky, but for once she didn't care. She knew Connor wouldn't kill her - provided she could count on that, there was no reason she shouldn't take the chance to goad him. If he didn't like it, too bad. Aria was a lot less occupied nowadays with sparing people's feelings, especially not his.

He wasn't playing the game badly, either. Aria had never been hard to wind up, after all - and Connor almost definitely knew her better than any other living person, unless Silara had poked around in her head a good deal longer than Aria had realised. Possibly even then. He'd been there for her high points and her low points: he really had helped her a great deal, she thought to herself reluctantly.

Luckily for her - less lucky for him - Aria was rather tired of being as useless as she had been the first time round. She stood without fear evident in her face; in fact, for once she was even difficult to read. Angry, but not at him. Afraid, but not of him. Worried that saying the wrong thing would make him turn around, and wondering why she was so determined to keep that from happening.

"You say you're in control, but it's still up to me whether I do what you want. If you were in control, I'd have come with you on Voss. Or on Drongar. You're still chasing me around the galaxy."

[member="Connor Harrison"]

 

[Connor Harrison]

So there it was. He was the one doing the running still. He had traced Aria. He was stood in the rain trying to figure out where she had been and what she had become.

No shackles.

"You're right."

He sighed and looked away, staring through the rain. The sound had always been comforting to Connor in his darkest moments on Voss, when he was alone. Lazy days spent looking out of the open window in his quarters listening to it pat down on the soil and stone of the garden. The low rumble of thunder in the distance. It brought him peace in an otherwise stormy moment. Connor found a little bit of peace just then in that second.

With the girl in his peripheral vision staring him down, Connor nonchalantly brought his right hand up to pull the cowl away slightly from his neck, leaning his head a little. A gentle tug of the fabric turned into momentum for a fast and vicious back-handed hit across Aria's face. The hard rear of Connor's hand cracked across her wet face with a satisfying sound, and he'd turn on impact to see the result. Either a disorientated stumble back or ungraceful fall.

Connor was over her in a second, standing there but not shouting or pointing or anything like that. Just staying in control of the violence he used and the harsh commanding tone to his voice.

"First rule. Respect. You learn to respect me and understand what I did was for your best interest. To shake the Jedi garbage from your head and wake you up to a stark reality. Pain makes it real, not fancy words or dark spells. I feel pain striking you, which means it's real to me. If it's real to you, then get up, if not, stay down in the muck and remain a nobody."

His blue eyes bore down on her. It was then he knew that nobody would live should they dared lay a hand on her like he just had.

[member="Aria Vale"]

 

[NightSister]

In a way, Aria saw it coming. After all, she'd goaded a reaction out of him quite shamelessly. She'd been sure he would do something - she hadn't known what, when, and just how much it would hurt.

Her head snapped to the side with the hit, taking the full impact with an audible crack. She blinked rapidly, trying to glare at Connor in between. God, her face burned. Aria swayed, one hand flying up to her stinging cheekbone, and she hit the ground unceremoniously. Alright, now he definitely had control, damn him. Ow.

It really hurt. Obviously, it was just a backhand, and wouldn't render her particularly weaker, but Force, it really hurt. If nothing else, she was certainly angry at him now. With the heel of her palm, she brushed mud off her jaw, looking up at him - even now, he looked so calm. It was so like him! Always a lesson, always something she was doing wrong, and always him staring her down calmly throughout. Aria wasn't calm at all; she was a mess. A confused and angry and hurt mess, knocked to the ground. Real? Oh, she'd show him real. She was allowed to be angry now, after all.

Aria got to her feet without her usual balance, but without any hesitation either. She wanted so badly to punch him again, but didn't. She wasn't exactly sure why.

"Fine. It hurts! You win."

[member="Connor Harrison"]

 

[Connor Harrison]

Watching every move she made from the hand motions on her cheek to the stance when she stood up in a less decorative fashion than before the hit, Connor narrowed his eye questioningly. The rain continued to beat down around them as an unforgiving spectator to their confrontation.

"Don't push me out, Aria. I won't play this game anymore. You want to hit me, then hit me. But I'll hit you ten times harder, and trust me I don't want to, but I will."

He swept his hair back.

"You and I, we're in this together whether you like it or not. The Dark Side of the Force is more to me than just words and actions - it's about feelings."

Connor stepped forward.

"It's taken me a decade to get where I am now, but I'm here and it feels right. You feel it too." A hand went to his chest. "Where do you want to be in a decade? To have walked a path as blurred as I have? Filled with manipulation and lies, or to start something mighty. Now. Here."

Tilting his head back to feel the rain, he blinked and inhaled gently, before returning his gaze to the girl, honesty in his voice.

"I'm not walking out on the future we can carve together for ourselves and the galaxy. Rulers. Conquerors. Anything you want. We take it with the resources at our fingertips."

[member="Aria Vale"]

 

[NightSister]

"Don't push you out?" Back to being at a loss for what to feel; Aria exhaled, looking at him in perplexed frustration. "Connor, I've not seen you in months. I don't know a thing about what you've done since - I don't know a thing about you anymore. What am I supposed to do?"

How nice it would be to have some sense of what she felt, what she wanted - to have the wisdom one would expect of someone who'd slaved through Jedi training for long enough to make Knight. Yes, that would be lovely. Maybe one day. Today, she was more uncertain than ever. When you took alignment out of the picture, Aria really had only the most basic understanding of herself. She got restless easily, she liked the thrill of combat, she craved a sense of belonging; small talk wore her down, she disliked being left to her own devices. The simple things.

But that was it, really. If she no longer had Jedi Master to work towards, then she was left without knowing what her goals would've otherwise been. Perhaps, truly, she wanted to take off with Connor - be a ruler, a conqueror - but it was buried beneath every other future available to her, everything that she'd ever wanted or even thought about. Despite that, the idea held appeal. Of course it did. It confused her and frightened her and made her want to fall asleep for a century...but it held appeal.

And even then, she couldn't be sure. She could never quite be sure when it came to Connor Harrison.

"I thought you were a Jedi. Turns out, you're not. Fine, I don't care. But I don't know how I'm meant to believe you anymore."

[member="Connor Harrison"]

 

[Connor Harrison]

As Aria was talking, the rain started to ease but it remained in the air; the hazy shower that often proceeded or ended another shower.

Maybe it was guilt that irked him, or maybe it was disappointment, with both himself and Aria. There had been a point both were scaling the same incline, but something happened along the way and knocked them off course and off track to split them up. She sounded defeated, and the only fire came across in her words.

"I was on Voss! You knew my quarters, you knew my ship. I was always there. I even came to Drongar to find you but you had taken on that idiot Nami so I wasn't going to waste my time with her around. So, yes, I left, but why did you think I'd have left you without coming back for you? I traveled Silver space and across the galaxy building my own fondations for when I - WE - left the Order. I come back, and you're gone. Maybe I was stupid for thinking you'd trust me enough to be there when I got back."

He hung his head and let the water trickle down his face and off his fringe. This whole scenario was wonderfully familiar. Giving reasons for his actions that often resulted in the loss and departure of those he actually cared for. With a soft bite of the lip, he rose his head again and looked at the fallen Knight.

"I'm not a Jedi anymore. The one stable thing I had for all of my life has gone. The mantle and reputation and stability as a Jedi. But, as that mantle has done nothing but hold me back and take life from me, I know I want more. And why do you keep dismissing what I say? I'm here, now, opening up to you."

Connor took a step back.

"It's up to you if you want to believe me or not." Another step back. "You already have a new Master, so it seems, putting more poison in your head. Oh, and how did you conversation with Darth Abyss go. Forget to tell me about that little rendezvous with a Sith?" He shook his head once. "And you say you can't trust me."

[member="Aria Vale"]

 

[NightSister]

"Of course I don't trust you!"

Aria glowered; her Force-aura spiked as confusion came closer to anger again. Connor had no right to talk about trust. Whatever had happened after that day on Voss, Aria had thought he was a Jedi and he'd proven her wrong in the most cutting way possible. She still trusted him in some ways: she trusted him not to kill her, and she trusted he wouldn't lie to her outright, but beyond that, Aria held no faith in him.

"Let's assume that you're right, and Silara's filling my head with poison. How exactly is that any different from what you did? You made me a Jedi." She almost spat the word out. "And then you left!"

She was one spiteful comment away from lashing out again - this time, with something a bit more lasting than a left hook, even. Truly, she wasn't violent. Not usually. Vengeful would be a better word. And currently, bewildered, aggravated, and without any desire to control how she felt.

He knew about Abyss too? Know-it-all. How the hell had that happened? It wasn't relevant, obviously - if Connor was allowed his secrets, so was she. It hadn't even really been a secret. If he'd asked, she would've told him. Probably.

"Oh, don't pretend you haven't kept things from me. Why are you surprised I don't trust you?"

[member="Connor Harrison"]

 

[Connor Harrison]

He wanted to keep backing away, to walk off out of the shower and go back to his ship and let her come to him with sounder mind, but she wasn't making it easy. She was getting all dramatic again, fighting what he was saying when he knew so much better. And she wasn't listening. With that, he stormed back over to her, up close and invasive. No wind or rain would drown out his words now.

"Listen to me. I didn't leave the Jedi so quit trying to blame me because you're finding it hard to accept you're glad I'm back. I left, or more was banished, days ago. You left for Silara, twice, but that's ok? I traveled myself for a while but, no, I left the Jedi in your eyes, ok that's fair."

The rain started to pick up.

"You came to me wanting help, and I gave it you. I didn't make you a Jedi, I made you into a warrior. Light or Dark was irrelevant. That would come later, but you ran to Silara before I even returned. You've shown me nothing but disrespect and insult from the day I let you in. The first person I told about Charzon was you. Everything else you know about." With that, he jabbed a finger in her chest. "Get over your own ego."

[member="Aria Vale"]