Private The Little Padawan Who Could

[Thelma Goth]

"So what if say, someone took an hour of their day to just do something specifically for you to eat that memory. How would that work?"

Thelma blanched, her eyes wide. "But, Master... It's so awkward, feeding on people, let alone the same person. Besides, who would even volunteer to do that?"

She was relieved when he didn't react badly to her needing twelve meals a day. "Because it would draw too much attention to me," she replied. "Most humanoids don't have to eat a full meal once per hour every day."

Kahlil Noble​

 

[Kahlil Noble]

"Awkward, maybe. But it's not as dangerous as going hungry, right? I don't know how much of a memory you'd really need, but if there's a way it helps, might be worth it." He shrugged his shoulders just a little. It was new ground for him to try and figure out. Seemed like it was for her too.

"Starving yourself draws more attention. There are millions of species in the Galaxy, humanoid alone. We can look for a species that needs a lot of food and say that's your species. Get you the meals you need."

Thelma Goth

 

[Thelma Goth]

"But..." She started to protest, only to falter. "Are you volunteering, master?"

Who else was she going to feed upon? She didn't want to tell anyone else what she was. Silas and Kahlil knowing was bad enough already.

"Fine," she murmured, feeling a little foolish. "I did get a membership card for the Bucket..."

Kahlil Noble​

 

[Kahlil Noble]

"Like I said, if it helps. Absolutely."

The question was if it would actually help. Only time would tell. Though he did raise a brow. Maybe he was too old.

"Uh.. Why do you need a card for a bucket?"

Thelma Goth

 

[Thelma Goth]

"Ew." She cringed. "I mean, no offense, but..." She didn't want to eat her master's memories. That was weird. He was old. He had gray hair, and was married with a kid and stuff.

She blinked at his question. "Oh. Uh, the Bucket. It's a restaurant that caters to aliens that need to eat a ton of food. You have to get membership to eat there. The food comes in buckets, hence the name."

Kahlil Noble

 

[Kahlil Noble]

".. Wait do you like, see the memories?"

That. That changed the whole thing. He nodded his head slowly. Buckets of food it was going to be. Then he laughed.

"Wait so you have access to it but you haven't bothered? Is it expensive or something?"

Thelma Goth

 

[Thelma Goth]

"... Wait do you like, see the memories?"

"Yes." She leaned her elbows on the table. "And it is expensive, so I don't go that often." Max had left her with many things, but a small fortune to spend was not one of them.

Kahlil Noble

 

[Kahlil Noble]

"Right. Yeah. No memories. Not mine anyway. I dont'.. Uh. Yeah."

Case closed. Buckets it was. Ish.

"Well, expensive will be a problem. I've got some money tucked away, not that much. I'll talk to the temple. See if they can help get you the food you need. Just.. Why are you keeping it a secret? The Council won't judge you for what you are. If anything, they'd want to help."

Thelma Goth

 

[Thelma Goth]

She looked at him, frowning.

"Maybe because my entire coven was wiped out by people who claimed they wanted to help us, then betrayed us?" Her frown deepened. Maybe Kahlil was just naïve, maybe he was blinded by his belief in the ideals of the Jedi and couldn't see the reality of human nature. "I don't trust people. Maybe on an individual level, but not whole groups. The mob mentality gets in there and poisons the well."

Kahlil Noble​

 

[Kahlil Noble]

"I wasn't saying tell everyone. Just the Council." The son of Carnifex knew better than most just how wicked a mob mentality could get. Even among the Jedi. Especially among the Jedi. But he sighed and shrugged regardless.

"It's your choice, though. I've no intention of making you do anything you don't want to. I just want you to feel safe. It's what everyone deserves to feel." That was that, though. He wasn't going to push her to tell her secret to anyone any more than he just did. Especially given she didn't tell him. And by the way she reacted earlier, she didn't really tell Silas either. Found out and forced to rely that they'd keep it secret.

He frowned. Maybe he shouldn't have just brought it up immediately. What's done was done, though.

"If this is how you feel safe, then that's what we'll do. We do have to figure out how to keep you fed. If you need that much food- Wait, have you been starving yourself?"

Thelma Goth

 

[Thelma Goth]

Relieved that her secret remained safe, Thelma leaned back a little in her chair, her posture relaxing.

"Wait, have you been starving yourself?"

She sat up stiffly again. "I'm not starving," she replied adamantly. "I'm just constantly on the brink of starvation. That's what you get when a Psy-Pire has to eat food rather than feed." Along with migraines, depression, and advanced aging.

Kahlil Noble​

 

[Kahlil Noble]

He squinted. Hard. And frowned.

"I'm putting in a request for extra rations to help cover how much you need to eat. .. Are you positive you can live on just food alone?"

Thelma Goth

 

[Thelma Goth]

"Yeah. I've been doing it. Only messed up once, and that was under unique circumstances."

Kahlil Noble​

 

[Kahlil Noble]

"If you're planning to be a Jedi, that unique experience is going to become the norm as you progress through the Order. We'll see if they have nutrient paste that's exceedingly high in calories for you." That might work. He lifted his drink, taking another sip. He missed sweet drinks for sure.

"But that's all we can do for now. About that hunger, anyway. Why do you want to be a Jedi?"

Thelma Goth

 

[Thelma Goth]

It would become the norm for her to have to go without food? Thelma once again deflated. Given the context of their conversation, she couldn't help but read into things. Kahlil seemed to be suggesting, perhaps unintentionally, that she should never have been a Jedi to begin with. That she wasn't fit for it.

"It's my duty," she replied. "I was born Sensitive. The Force chose me to have this power, so I need to train and put it to good use. I must become a Jedi and serve others."

Kahlil Noble

 

[Kahlil Noble]

"Mm. That's just a reason people think we should. I want to know what inspired you." Trained and true response. He was even tracked down by other Jedi to become one himself because it was his duty and responsibility. Because of his father.

"Why do you want to be a Jedi. You don't have to have an answer, but it's something I want you to think on, alright?"

Thelma Goth

 

[Thelma Goth]

“But it is why I’m here,” Thelma insisted, her brow furrowing. What was wrong with her answer? Was he being cynical? Did he find it so hard to believe she might just want to do the right thing? Did he think she had to be coached or forced into doing that which was clearly difficult or unpleasant for her?

“I was inspired by morality and basic common sense. My only other alternatives are the Dark Side, or apathy. Apathy is death, and I certainly don’t want to become a Sith.”

Kahlil Noble​

 

[Kahlil Noble]

"So basic common sense is you starve yourself?"

He raised a brow.

"Alright. Fine. It's your choice on what you do with your life."

Thelma Goth

 

[Thelma Goth]

For a few moments, Thelma just looked at Kahlil. When next she spoke, she did so in a calm and even tone.

“I told you I wasn’t starving myself,” she said. “It is easier for me to starve when I’m on a diet that my body isn’t adapted for. But that’s not the point of this, is it? You’re either testing me to see how strong my convictions really are, or you don’t believe I should even be here. Well, I hope it’s not the latter, because if it is, this apprenticeship is going to be very difficult for us both.”

She rose from her seat to throw away the remains of their drinks and snacks. When she returned, she was still mostly composed, though there was a tremble in her voice, like she might start crying again and was fighting it.

“I had a master before you. Master Maxim Koschei. He was a Psy-Pire, like me. You might say he beat the odds. But he believed in me. Every master should believe in their apprentice.”

Resting a hand against the back of her chair, she didn’t sit down again, instead waiting to either be dismissed or led elsewhere.

Kahlil Noble​

 

[Kahlil Noble]

"I was approached in a club after I fled the Sith by a Jedi. He used some of the local Zeltrons to force me to stay calm as he explained to me it was my duty to serve the Jedi and fight against Carnifex, my father. I believe anyone willing to give themselves to help others deserves to be here, to be Jedi. But I don't want you to be a Jedi because you believe you have no other choice. You, and everyone, should have a choice."

He watched her for a moment before letting out a sigh. Kahlil stood, rubbing at the back of his neck.

"There's no odds. I believe you're already a good Jedi. I don't mention starvation because I think it's a danger. I mention it because it shows just how dedicated you are. I believe in you. But I also believe it's important that what happened with Silas doesn't happen again. But I've also not been the best master in the past. Silas was my only Padawan, and when I left, Valery took him on. I never had a master. No one trusts a Zambrano, or believes in them. .. Just know I do believe in you, okay? I wouldn't of kept it a secret or asked for you to be my Padawan if I didn't."

Thelma Goth