The Sand Between Your Toes

[Subject 37]

[member="Joza Perl"]

For a few moments at least his focus was drawn away from thoughts of what might happen, what she might do, and instead he thought about just what he wanted to eat.

Ice cream wasn't really something that he'd given a lot of thought to over the last...well probably his entire life. He'd had it before of course, back on bastion, but it seemed like such a long time ago that he could hardly even remember the flavors. He frowned at that, knowing that the realization was more than a little bit depressing.

For a moment The Soldier just read the plates, glancing at the pictures for a moment. "That, I think."

Jorg glanced at the man behind the small cart, then pointing his finger towards what appeared to be a simple cone of vanilla ice cream covered in chocolate and hazelnuts. Nothing fancy really, but then again now was hardly the time for anything of the sort.

He glanced at Joza, waiting to see what she'd get.

 

[Joza Perl]

“Good choice.” She commented, tilting her chin towards the image of a cross sectioned ice cream bar, vanilla bean in a chocolate shell. “I’ll have that, please.”

Somehow the act of getting ice cream made her feel more at ease. Jorg seemed to lose a bit of the tension in his shoulders, and she hoped that the frozen treat would help him unwind.

“My little one likes to come here. Whenever he sees the ice cream cart, he lets go of my hand and takes off towards it.” Her voice lifted, sounding happy as she recalled the many times she’d gone chasing after the toddler. Luckily the sand slowed his little legs down before he could get very far.

[member="Jorg"]

 

[Subject 37]

[member="Joza Perl"]

A flash of surprise caught over his face.

"You're a mother." For some reason that had never really occurred to the soldier. It was of course perfectly natural of course, but he'd never even considered it here. He frowned for just a moment, then smiled softly.

He didn't want her to think he thought ill of her.

"That's wonderful." He said, genuine warmth in his tone. "What's his name?"

 

[Joza Perl]

She was used to the surprise, the taken aback looks whenever she mentioned her child for the first time. To be honest, she couldn’t blame them and typically didn’t get upset by that sort of reaction. She didn’t seem like the mothering type anyhow.

What took her by surprise was the fact that Jorg seemed…happy? This was the first time she’d seen him show any sort of positive emotion, or even smile.

Luckily Joza’s favorite subject was her handsome little prince.

“His name is Alan. He’s about 20 months old now.” Her face lit up as she spoke. “He loves starships, Wally the Wampa and bananas. And he has red hair like mine.”

[member="Jorg"]

 

[Subject 37]

[member="Joza Perl"]

He smiled at her, and for the moment at least, the flashes of what he had done to her disappeared completely.

"Sounds like me at that age." Jorg said with a small grin. Most boys were of course the same at a young age, they liked shiny things, large fluffy animals, and whatever food they could get their hands on that was completely described as 'healthy'. His mother had always said that as a child Jorg had been somewhat of a monster, running all over the Estate and bothering everyone from high level politicians to security guards.

He'd always had a lot of energy.

Jorg began to feel more at ease. Perhaps because of the reminders of his own childhood, or because of a brief glimpse into something he'd always wanted. "His father must be proud."

The assumption wasn't a large one, most fathers were.

 

[Joza Perl]

“Yeah?” She laughed a little, thoughts turning fondly to her toddler son. “He loves running around. I’ve got to be careful what I say though because he’s started talking—his brain is like a little sponge, I swear!”

He hadn’t repeated any curse words yet, and though Joza was careful to control her language around him she’d had her slip=ups as any parent would.

The conversation edged towards Alan’s father, perhaps predictably. Her smile fell but it did not drop completely, rather it seemed more muted as she took a few moments to figure out how to respond. Would Alan’s father be proud? She had never gotten the chance to discuss it with Haytham before she—

“His father isn’t in the picture.” She said softly. Her shoulders rose and fell in a shrug before she could allow herself to dip back into those darker thoughts. “It’s not uncommon for Zeltrons to be single parents given our culture. I was raised by a single mother myself, so…”

[member="Jorg"]

 

[Subject 37]

[member="Joza Perl"]

"Oh." Surprise colored his face. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to offend."

Suddenly he stumbled over his words. "I-if I did, I mean."

Single mothers were almost entirely unheard of on Bastion. The culture of his homeworld demanded that everything was set right and perfect when it came to family, especially in the circles he'd been born into. Family important, more so than in other places. Everything was supposed to be perfect within the household, everything. There was no room for surprises, and there certainly wasn't room for a woman trying to raise a baby on her own.

That didn't mean Jorg disliked it though, just the opposite in fact. "He's lucky to have you as a mother."

Jorg didn't know Joza all that well of course, but from what he'd seen so far she was a strong, confident woman who knew exactly where she wanted to go and what she wanted to be. He respected that, liked it more than he should have.

 

[Joza Perl]

Joza smiled back at him. “No, you’re alright.”

At least he was careful with how his words could be taken on a delicate subject, which she appreciated. There wasn’t much negative judgement on Zeltros for being a single mother but she was aware enough to know that not all cultures supported being a single parent. She had to guess that on Borealis, life went differently.

His next statement surprised her a bit, enough to the point where she paused for a few seconds. “I certainly hope so.” It wasn’t always easy, hell it was usually never easy. The sleepless nights, the body fluids, the lack of showering and eating properly took its toll on her but they were absolutely worth it. Parting from him for business was hard, knowing that a nanny would be tucking him in at night instead of his own mother.

She didn’t voice that though. Instead, she rolled her eyes a little and spoke in a joking manner. “Oh, I don’t think he feels the same way when I make him take a bath or turn off the tv for bed.”

[member="Jorg"]

 

[Subject 37]

[member="Joza Perl"]

He smiled.

"When he's older he'll appreciate it." The way Jorg said it was warm and confident, almost like he knew he could tell the future. He glanced at Joza for a moment more and then took a small bite of his ice cream. He smiled appreciatively, then started to walk slowly down towards where they had come from. It wasn't that he was trying to get away from her, just that he didn't want to stand there with a crowd of people trying to get ice cream.

To prove that as he stood a few feet away from her Jorg half turned, waiting for Joza to catch up to him.

He had forgotten about their past, at least towards the moment, his mind now on her future instead. Perhaps a part of him felt less guilty, or rather, less responsible than it had before. Despite what he had done to her, what the Sith had done to her she turned out more than okay.

She had a child, and loved him. "Coming?"

He asked.

 

[Joza Perl]

Jorg didn’t seem the same man he was a rough twenty minutes ago—when they’d first started talking he was rigid with anxiety, it’s source she could not pinpoint accurately. He’d said it was over her looks but she wasn’t sure if she believed that. Something told her that there was another reason he’d taken care not to look her in the eye, body language shifting away from her and almost defensively around himself.

He’d warmed up considerably since then, becoming more talkative and personable as the topic shifted to her child. In truth she was wary of alluding to her toddler at first given that the idea of a baby was enough to scare some men away from even a pleasant conversation. It seemed to have the opposite effect on Jorg, maybe.

“Mhm,” She follow a few paces after him before catching up, biting into the ice cream bar as she did and wincing against the suddenly chill on her teeth. A swipe of the tongue took care of that.

“So, how about you? Any children?”

[member="Jorg"]

 

[Subject 37]

[member="Joza Perl"]

He frowned almost instantly as Joza said it.

"No." It wasn't like a great shame that he had been carrying for years, but it had been a thought for him before. On Bastion, family was important. Even though it was structured, lies were built around it, and everything else, family was still the core of who you were. Sons, daughters, wives, they were all important and Jorg had been taught that from a young age. He frowned for a moment, his hand tightening into a fist as he glanced towards the ocean for a moment.

"I'm afraid not." He continued quietly, glancing at Joza. "Not that lucky."

He shot her a smile.

Once he'd had a shot at that, a long time ago, though it had vanished in the blink of an eye. The Soldier stepped forward, moving back onto the beach and taking another small bite of ice cream.

 

[Joza Perl]

Though innocent in nature, her question seemed to spike a quieter change in Jorg. Her heart sank a little instantly, mentally retracing her steps to see if she’d accidentally stepped on any sore areas. Right when they were making progress too!

He smiled at least, even if it was an attempt to not make her feel bad or to cover his own upset with the topic.

Lucky. Joza would fully insist that she was the luckiest sentient in the galaxy for having the cutest little man waiting at home for her. Proud parent? Of course.

“At least you don’t have someone who constantly vomits on you, not to mention the other bodily fluids. Or wakes you up several times in the middle of the night, won’t eat his cereal but tries to grab your coffee every time he sees it, pulls at your hair, interrupts your shower…” She began listing things off on her fingers, joking smile returning to her face.

[member="Jorg"]

 

[Subject 37]

[member="Joza Perl"]

He smiled.

There was something about what Joza said that made him wonder. When he'd been young, back on Bastion before becoming a stormtrooper, he'd thought he'd had an opportunity for family. His life had been planned out in his life. College, an administrative job, marriage, children. All of it had been a plan, and oddly enough...it had been exactly what he'd wanted. His friends had always mocked him for it, but to Jorg it had been a nice fantasy.

A simple one, but still.

"For some reason..." Jorg trailed off, looking at Joza

The Soldier wondered how silly he would sound, how off. He could tell that she was joking of course, that she was proud of the life she had made for herself and her child, but he couldn't help but think she would judge him a fool. After all what did he know about fatherhood? "I don't think I'd mind that with my own children."

He was just a stormtroper.

 

[Joza Perl]

There was something there, that sort of far off look that people got in their eyes when they thought of something deeply. Something important, something they may have touched on a thousand times over in their own mind. Whatever it was, Jorg looked thoughtful as he trailed off to look at her, citing that he wouldn’t imagine the nitty gritty of raising his old children.

In turn, this made her think on her own experiences. She was terrified when she found out she was pregnant—not only with what, but by who. She’d had a vicious on-off affair with the father for years, but they’d parted under poor terms and Joza was afraid of what would happen if she went to him with the child. At one point in her life she would have thought to make a family work between them, but it was something she couldn’t risk.

In the end, she’d elected to have the child and raise him on her own. Alan ended up being a turning point in her life, not a weight that dragged her down. He inspired her to be more responsible and build the kind of life she’d always wanted. Or at least, better than what she’d had before.

“They’ll make you lose your mind but you’ll forgive them over and over again.” She returned his soft smile. “Absolutely worth it.” A pause.

“Until he turns into a teenager maybe. Judging by my own teenage years…” She winced playfully.

[member="Jorg"]

 

[Subject 37]

[member="Joza Perl"]

He smiled for a moment, his mind riddled with a thoughts of a future that he had been denied.

"Well." Jorg began. "That's why you occupy them."

That was at least what his parents had done with him. There had been a thousand different things that Jorg had done throughout his youth, most of them at the behest of his father. He'd joined clubs, taken up hobbies, and of course been made to take lessons in everything from fencing to writing High Basic. It had all been a rather broad experience, but he was better off for it. Then again, he'd never really been much for a rebel so perhaps that was why it worked on him.

"Hobbies." He explained.

For a moment Jorg glanced towards Joza

"My father had be take up a dozen of them." He shrugged. "Half of them I liked, the other half I hated."

It had been a good way to keep him out of trouble though.

 

[Joza Perl]

“Occupy them?”

Joza’s expression turned questioning before Jorg had started to elaborate. Occupying him now was difficult as he was always on the go, always looking for something to do. What was good was that he was distracted easily as most two years olds were. But when he got bored or fussy…well, then she had trouble. But she supposed that was the plight of any parent.

“Hm, that’s a good idea.” She rolled the thought over in her mind. Lately she’d been spending some time analyzing her own past and the way she was raised, trying to figure out what had happened there for her to turn out the way she had. By no means did she go from degenerate to successful business woman in a matter of months or a few years, but rather she’d hit several low points before she decided to take charge of her life.

“I’ll definitely have to start him on a track like that to keep him out of trouble.” She affirmed. Part of the reason she’d dropped out of school so young was poverty and the need for a job, and part of it was the unintentional neglect. Her mother loved her dearly but worked a lot and tended to be lax in discipline because she was exhausted. Looking back, Joza couldn’t blame her—she’d done the best with a chitty situation and she had nothing but love for the kind woman whose life would have likely been much better without a child in tow.

“What was your favorite hobby?”

[member="Jorg"]

 

[Subject 37]

[member="Joza Perl"]

The question gave him a moment of pause, though that was helped by the small bite of ice cream that he had taken a moment before she'd spoken. When hed been a teenager his father had insisted on half a dozen lessons in everything from calligraphy to fencings. Most of the skills had been later applied to his life as a stormtrooper.

They had helped him survive in one way or another.

”Of the lessons I took? He considered a moment more. ”Dance, I think.”

A surprising answer perhaps. ”It was enjoyable. Something intricate about it, plus always let me get close to the ladies.”

He let out a chuckle, remembering the past lessons.

Dance had been one of the few times hed been able to enjoy himself. It hadn't been because of the dancing itself of course, but rather the lack of pressure to it. In fencing, dejarik, almost everything his father had always insisted he be the best, but in dance? Well not so much. That had just been so he would look the part of a nobleman during Bastions many galas.

It has been an escape.

 

[Joza Perl]

“What, really?” Both brows rose and she couldn’t keep a stupid grin from starting. “You dance?”

Surprising, but probably not that surprising now that she thought about it. “I just happen to own my own dance studio…s. Studios.” She spoke in a mock haughty tone, hand coming to rest against her chest as she pushed her shoulder back. “I’m a dancer by trade. But, ah, the dances I typically do have more hip movements than you’re probably used to.”

Never could be too sure. Maybe he’d had a rebellious streak as a male stripper.

Exotic dance was one thing, but the Zeltron took pride in the many forms she knew. She had to expand her repertoire over the years, after all.

“So are you any good?”

[member="Jorg"]

 

[Subject 37]

[member="Joza Perl"]

His cheeks reddened for a moment at the mention of moving hips.

"Probably not." Jorg admitted. "It's been about ten years."

Longer than that actually. The last lesson he'd taken was just after his nineteenth birthday. Shortly after that he had joined the Stormtrooper corps at his fathers behest, and since then...well there hadn't really been all that much opportunity for dancing. "I used to be."

He stated with a smile.

"But I imagine that's faded by now." Jorg was still pretty quick on his feet even now, but that wasn't dancing.

Briefly the Legionnaire thought about Bespin again, that moment when he'd managed to close the distance between himself and the good doctor. It had been an impressive feat of agility, something Locke had complimented him on afterward.

 

[Joza Perl]

“You’d be surprised what you remember.” She commented quickly. “Learning dance helps you with your maneuverability and energy conservation.” Which was a long winded way to say that it made you more agile. Joza’s ability to move with precision was a big asset when dealing with slower, heavier foes and she owed most of that to her dance training.

It was about more than just looking good and creating a pleasing figure. It was about poise, muscle control, attitude, rhythm and grace. It took a lot of hard work and practice for those to come together and was more often than not passed over as something easy to do. It didn’t have to be difficult—dance was as much of a struggle as you made it.

“Want to try again?” She commented off hand, quite literally licking some of the melted ice cream off of her fingers with a few quick swipes of the tongue. "I prefer to lead, though."

[member="Jorg"]