This Is How They Died

[Placeholder 0128]

[SIZE=10.5pt][member="Loske Matson"][/SIZE]

"You have me," Loske offered.

[SIZE=10.5pt]Cedric was not certain how to reply to Loske's acceptance. He stared at her curiously, uncertain of what action to take. He had never spoken of the sins committed against his sibling to a soul. They were private burdens, ones which the Jedi had been chosen to carry alone on his journey. The mere existence of Caida was admitting to a weakness in Cedric's heart, and it was a weakness anyone with the right mind could exploit.[/SIZE]

[SIZE=10.5pt]the fact that he felt alright with sharing such with Loske was telling. He either trusted the woman, or he was very drunk. Perhaps both.[/SIZE]

[SIZE=10.5pt]"It's alright," he lifted his shoulders in a slight shrug. "I'm drunk, and you're curious. I can answer a few questions now, deep or otherwise," he waved a hand about dismissively, as if to prove that such matters were trivial.[/SIZE]

[SIZE=10.5pt]"I can do lessons," he waved his empty glass about. A feeling that was more or less unknown to the Jedi fell over him. He found himself...well, quite well intoxicated with Loske’s gaze. He excused it with the truth that he was well and drunk, and the blonde was speaking rather...well, he didn’t really know. There was something about it. Whatever.[/SIZE]

[SIZE=10.5pt]“Y’know you know a good bit about me. I don’t know much anything about you.”[/SIZE]

 

[Loske Treicolt]

She lifted her hands defensively, leaning back in her chair with a small chuckle and shake of her head. “That’s okay, I don’t think I can do with anymore lessons from you tonight. It’ll ruin my trademarked eternal optimism and I’ll have to go on this whole soul searching journey,” she gestured an epic adventure out as she spoke and signalled to the droid for an ale at the same time. “I can wait.”

[The galaxy can’t. ]

Loske sighed and gave her droid companion a face, which he only registered as a flex of polyhedral connections but stored it against his predetermined emotions from his mistress. Part of the expression was a sharp dart of her eyes toward [member="Cedric Grayson"], as if communicating to cut it out. There’d be no mind connections tonight it seemed. If she wanted to be telepathic, and get this guy in an XWing. It’d be tomorrow.

Unless..

“Oh.. meee..” She drawled out the last vowel with a grimace as the droid set down the amber liquid in front of her, and she eyed the frothy top for a moment. “Well, I’m the best pilot you’ll ever meet. That’s mostly because I was uh..” she took a sip of her drink, and could still feel her toes. So she took a bigger gulp. “Made to be.” She winced. “Kiskla Grayson isn’t really my mom in the traditional sense, I’m a test tube baby from her and Marcello Matteo. All their genetics stuffed into a lab and..” she snapped her fingers, then gestured to herself “boom. Me and my brother.”

Wow. That was the first time she’d said that out loud. Freaky. “If we’d had been successful, there’d probably be hundreds of me running around as a little army right now, but I’m defective apparently.”

 

[Placeholder 0128]

Cedric gave her a look that was all confusion. His brow raised, and he drew back for a moment, as if momentarily overwhelmed that Loske was a test tube baby. In a sense he absolutely was. "Really?" He lofted a brow, though his tone remained pleasant. "Never would have taken you for the sort...though I guess there isn't really a sort for perfect kids," Cedric snickered. He was not, evidently, concerned by the source of Loske's birth.

"You're defective?" He snorted. "I don't see how that works out. An army of you would probably be quite capable. It sounds more like your progenitors are a little stupid." The Jedi shook his head.

"What was the purpose anyway?" He sounded genuinely curious. "Galactic domination via army of Jedi children?"

[member="Loske Matson"]

 

[Loske Treicolt]

Loske smiled at the validation that she didn’t look like a clone. Or seem like one.
That was good! For all intents and purposes, she figured most of her bugs were ironed out, and she was fairly normalized and stable at this point. Except when breaking atmosphere. She got nauseous. For emphasis to [member="Cedric Grayson"] having the veil lifted, she gave a theatrical toss of her hair, as if there were a big ta-da moment shared.

“To tell you the truth I haven’t really put much thought into it. Whatever the purpose was, it wasn’t my choice. What I’m doing now is.

I was supposed to be able to use The Force to the capacity of each of my parents, and then some. But as we know, no Force. Except this new telepathy trick, hence, defective.”

She paused, a wry grin snaking across her lips “Wait, are you saying I’m sort of a perfect kid?”

 

[Placeholder 0128]

"I suppose that's all that really matters," Cedric agreed as an element of sobriety returned to him. It certainly wasn't there in its entirety, but his thoughts were at least beginning to find a base level of coherence. "Normally I'd say something philosophical, but the words are escaping me right now." He added as he sipped on his drink. There's be no more downing it for Cedric. He knew his limit, and whilst it was a known fact Jedi could remove alcohol from their blood, Cedric was not so practiced with the art as to manage it perfectly while intoxicated.

Truthfully he didn't care to be anyway. This was a welcome break from the usual conflict of...well, general existence really.

"Perfect kid?" He asked, a brow raised, "I think you might be thinking a little highly of yourself." He fired, though the sly smile he wore indicated its good nature. "The Force doesn't work in obvious ways," he waved a hand about like the drunken mystic that he was. "It's likely you're not so much defective as you've not found a way to properly access the empyrean. Whomever created you likely didn't know how to bring it about either. Few people can just access it."

His brow furrowed as he delved into his own thoughts. "Normally there's a trigger of sorts. A life event, otherwise you'd have infants throwing star ships around during their tantrums. For example, I couldn't use the Force until I was around five. Fell off a riding wolf, and managed to catch myself mid-air." He paused, "Some just have it from birth. Those are the rarities. They tend to be the ones old masters mark out for prophecy and great destiny. It's all wishful thinking, usually."

[member="Loske Matson"]

 

[Loske Treicolt]

"Oh no, I thought you were thinking highly of me." Loske corrected, tipping the rim of her glass in his direction as she swirled the remaining contents around to make the froth of the ale reappear.

When [member="Cedric Grayson"] spoke about when people detected her affinity for The Force, the pilot snickered at the word painting of red-faced babies, squatting in their diapers and skin rolls jiggling as they swirled their arms about. Above them a mobile of starships colliding and blossoming into sparks and fire. She imagined their eyes alight with mirth and mischief as the fictitious infant defied obedience.

"And do you remember that yourself, how did you feel right before it happened?"

 

[Placeholder 0128]

Cedric snickered. "Ah, well I very well may. I suppose we'll have to find out," he lifted his glass, letting the bright blue contents sway about just enough that they did not spill over the edge. It seemed that his darkened mood had left him, at least for the moment. He had told very few souls about what had occurred with his sister. Family matters were better left kept private, and the fewer that knew what ate at him, the more invulnerable to exploitation he was.

Perhaps it was a mistake to trust Loske. Perhaps it wasn't. Only time would tell.

"I do," his voice took on a more somber candor. "It's one of the earliest things I can recall. I remember the feeling of the snow on my face, and the smell of dying pines around me as we rode through the forest. I remember being frightened of just how quickly were were moving through the snow, of how powerful the wolf we were riding was. My mother yelled, and I found myself flying off the wolf's back for what felt like a few thousand feet."

He paused, reaching up to scratch at the back of his bare scalp before continuing. "I was completely convinced I was going to die, and then for just a second or so, I was floating motionless a foot or so off the ground. After that I fell, and I was totally fine."

[member="Loske Matson"]

 

[Loske Treicolt]

"It sounds like you were riding close to a cliff, how far was this fall? My first image was you just romping around some grass -- this sounds like a much more traumatic scenario. Your mother must have been so relieved." The contents of her glass were now empty, and she blinked happily at the change in conversation. She did much better in an optimistic environment and that somber moment seemed to be something they both tucked into their mental pockets for a later revisit should it be necessary.

To this point, Loske was impressed at [member="Cedric Grayson"]'s willingness to converse with her so openly. It could have gone an entirely different direction if Metellos had played a different role. There was something endearing about the fact she could sit across the counter with him, drinking, without worrying about the conflict of their parents. Both legacies in their own rights and not a chip on either of their kid's shoulders. Cool stuff.

"Was it here? Can I have a tour of this place?"

 

[Placeholder 0128]

"I very well could have been. honestly I don't remember much beyond it, just my mom scooping me up. We never went wolf riding again after that," he snickered. His mother, Cyrene, had been a stormtrooper in her youth. She'd been quite the accomplished sniper, serving in several battles against the Republic. It was funny to think of her that way, given the rather timid and overprotective woman Cedric had known her as.

"No, that was back on Ession." He refused to allow himself to fall into melancholic memory again, instead stating it only as fact. "My father cleared large sections of the land during his reign to return some of the planet to its wildlife. The mountains were his favorite - we spent a lot of our time there when I was little."

Finding that he too had emptied his glass, Cedric drew himself up to his feet. Standing was a bit more difficult than he'd thought it would be, but he managed to right himself without tipping over. "I'll show you what I can. Some sections are blocked off this late - people sleeping and such."

He motioned for her to follow him. "Shall we?"

[member="Loske Matson"]

 

[Loske Treicolt]

Her chrono indicated that [member="Cedric Grayson"] wasn't lying about the time. Apparently it'd been a few hours since she'd arrived, and she blinked several times in disbelief when that realization struck. She mouthed a slurred Woah of surprise.

She followed his cue and rose from her seat, tucking it in behind her while Frank rolled alongside the pair. The metallic sound against the stone a dull tone in contrast to the light steps of the humans. The fact that the bar they'd been in was so closely connected to the spaceport, and that they had to be wary of people snoozing at this time made this whole place feel somewhat like a space station. A schematic the blonde was well acquainted with.

"How long has this been on Ruusan? And all inhabited? I've never been to Ruusan before."

That wasn't all to surprising, given the whole clone thing. She'd really only been to a handful of planets, and in saying that, got lost in a thought of how many planets and systems she could have visited if she'd truly been a child of two Jedi Masters plundering through the galaxy.

 

[Placeholder 0128]

The crisp mountain air was always a comfort to Cedric. Every time he stepped out into the wilds of Ruusan, he was reminded why his family had chosen to settle here. There was something truly peaceful about the planet, as if it had the best intentions for those residing upon it. Thus it had been the perfect place to train new generations of Jedi Knights, and in their heyday the Graysons had trained many.

"I can't give you an exact date, but according to the history this castle was built by my ancestor during the Great Sith Wars. This was after the fall of the Sith Empire, during the age of the Brotherhood of Darkness. Jedi then were extremely disorganized and independent, much like they are now. They were cut off by one another in such a way that they created their own sects and sets of belief. Some became the protectors of world, some even entire systems. These were the Jedi Lords."

Cedric's fingers trailed along the cobblestone of the battlements. There were few people out and about at this hour, save for a handful of guards and students undergoing late night training. The castle was barely lit, save for the light of the moon shining down from above.

"My ancestor was named Vicarion Grayson. until recently, he could manifest as a force ghost. He was something of a mentor to me," Cedric continued as he would lead her down a set of winding stairs that traveled deep beneath the castle's surface. "My family was...a bit defiant of the Republic. We held our titles of Lords and Ladies until the majority of us died when Darth Revan led his followers against the Republic. After that we assimilated, and Ruusan became just another Jedi academy."

A soft greenish-blue light filtered up from the bottom of the stairwell. Cedric cracked a warm smile as he approached it, "This was place lost when last woman to know of it was killed during the Jedi Purge of the Clone Wars. I found it by the Force's will after Ession fell, and it's been my home ever since."

[member="Loske Matson"]

 

[Loske Treicolt]

“See,” Loske picked up on the part of the conversation she felt she had an opinion on. “This is another thing, when you suggested being a Jedi back on Metellos, it just seems so frustrating to have that title. Not only the standards, but the eternal infighting. There’s a whole faction that exists out there because some of the standards my mother set when she was Grandmaster.” Loske gestured as she spoke, cautious not to step too out of line in this tour. Although, when possible, she peeked her head around stone archways and doorways that were dimly lit, and registered as many faces as she could in the moonlight. “And that same factional division seems to exist. I guess that’s going to happen though, when you give perfect powers to imperfect humans.” This was all spoken while the pilot stole a moment to observe the rhythms of a handful of students undergoing training.

At the top of the stairs, Frank gave a mechanic grunt when his wheeled footplacements and general weight couldn’t continue safely downwards. And Loske was not equipped to carry him, especially when she was tripping a little bit herself. She had descended two stairs when she turned around to realize her astromech’s plight. Distress evidenced on her features, and she looked forlornly at him “Oh, no, I’m sorry buddy.” Usually, she might suggest they go another route, but there was glowing downstairs!

Scuttling upward, she kneeled and suggested he continue his tour on the main grounds. And feel free to check on the ship. If he wanted to do any scans, she was welcoming him to. Once he grouchily acquiesced, she returned to her tour guide whose silhouetted was highlighted with emerald streaks, giving an ethereal seeming outline to his general build. Marvelled, she drank in the radiating spectacle.

“What is this place?”

 

[Placeholder 0128]

Loske had a point. Fortunately it was one Cedric had encountered several times in his travels. The history of the Jedi Order was extremely long, detailed, and often convoluted. It something he had studied since he could learn to read, and had grown from a necessary field of study into a passion. He wagered he knew more of the Order's history than most living Jedi did, and enjoyed spreading it whenever he could.

"Honestly the Jedi Order has rarely been fractured. I've studied our history since I was a very small boy. There have been divisions, yes, but they tend to be sporadic and rather temporary. The Jedi Order as an organization stood more or less united for ten thousand years, and it functioned at its height then."

They found themselves in a massive underground chamber. The scent of a living forest filled the air, along with flickering spores that glowed with blue light. In the center of the room stood a massive tree. The bark was a shade of whitish-blue, and its leaves glowed with icy blue bioluminescence. The Force thrummed with purpose here. Cedric found himself filled with a sense of importance, pleasantness, and warmth that overshadowed the heart of his intoxication.

"The schisms usually happen when we've been beaten. It's no coincidence the Silver Jedi split from the Republic just weeks before the One Sith launched their invasion," he paused as he strode toward the tree, coming to a halt at the base of the stairs that led up to it. "I don't the trust the Silvers. At all. They work with Sith, they forsake the old teachings, and they spit on true unity. I have a theory that they helped facilitate the One Sith's rise for their own benefit, or at the very least knew it was going to happen, and did nothing to stop it."

Cedric was clearly impassioned by the subject, as he did not physically react to the calming presence of the Old Oak. "The Jedi Lords came about when the Jedi Order was all but destroyed. they did what they had to do, and when the time came they assimilated. The Jedi of the modern age are...different." Cedric's brow furrowed. "Most are self-taught, and pay no heed to tradition. They think they know the way. That they can live without history, belief, or a code: as if they're heroes from a child's book or something of the like."

Slowly he began to ascend the stairs. "The vast majority are children with lightsabers that call themselves Jedi without knowing what it truly means. That is why we have this division, and that is why the Sith Empire and their lackeys are dominating the galaxy. We have a generation of pretenders. That's why I wanted to teach you. I intend to build a new order, one that is truly worthy of inheriting the legacy of the Jedi."

He finally halted. He knew he was rambling, but the subject was one close to his heart, and he rarely had the opportunity to speak of it candidly. "This," he gestured toward the tree, "Is the Old Oak. It is the Force given living form."

[member="Loske Matson"]

 

[Loske Treicolt]

Loske never could have imagined what lay beneath the cobblestones they’d just been treading. She couldn’t conceal the gasp that evidenced when the sight manifested. At the end of that spiralled staircase was a whole ecosystem in itself, sustaining one perennial plant. The knots and twists of the bark were saturated in a cerulean glow she didn’t think possible for flora.

Herself and [member="Cedric Grayson"] were bathed in azure highlights, and she stepped in nearer - as if proximity would help her keep listening. She was hearing his expressions of disfavour for the Silver Jedi. She wanted nothing more than to press on and draw closer to the impressive foliage - when he took the lead, she eagerly followed and kept her chin tilted up - mouth parted in awe at the stretch of glowing leaves. Cedric started to talk about his wistful goals and part of her wondered how he often talked about this sort of stuff with other people. His past, his future.. all someone had to do, it seemed, was challenge the Jedi Master to a round of shots and whoops! There’s everything.

She finally realized how lost her expression was to just reacting to all of everything and she shut her mouth with a click of her teeth.

“Well,” She breathed after a pregnant silence between them “You can teach me to use what I have.”

Her gaze never navigated from the twists in the bark. She traced each roll of the wood, as it stretched into strong branches and back down to the solid roots that would disappear below the earth. “How does something like this exist?” Her body felt heavy and light at the same time, a total conflict but also balanced. She felt excited, but safe and calm. Balanced.

She wanted to stay here forever.

 

[Placeholder 0128]

Normally Cedric would have been consumed with showing another the ways of the Force. It was a passion of his, truly the greatest of them, but his recent opining on the matters of Jedi politics had his mind in other places.

Perhaps now was the time to start putting his ideas to reality. Maliphant and his band were just as much a threat as the emperor and his sycophants, but no one was trying to oppose them save for himself. Loske could be the first of many.

It was so easy for the seeds of ambition to be planted in one's mind...

"If that's what you feel you want to do," Cedric nodded. His arms drew wide as he turned toward the Old Oak, beholding its majesty. It seemed all the intoxication had left him, replaced with the warmth of the Light. "I would teach you, train you as the first of a new generation of Essonian Knights, but I feel that I must tell you of my reputation first." he tilted his head to face her, his expression serious, "I am not like most Jedi Loske. I am shunned by my brethren. They call me a zealot because I have dedicated my life to fighting the Sith. If you want to find a more moderate teacher, I would understand."

[member="Loske Matson"]

 

[Loske Treicolt]

Loske still had diverted her attention from the stretching, luminescent flora. It begged her to touch it, and warned her to stay away all at the same time. She tested a step forward, partly expecting to be repelled backward.

This memory was her own. There was nothing in the back of her head suggesting she’d seen something this glorious before, not with her own eyes or her maternal donors. Perhaps that was partly why she was so entranced by the spectacle.

“Does being your student mean I have to be just like you, or can I augment what I like?” Again, she stepped forward, distractedly spreading her fingertips toward the tree. The blue outlined each phalange, shadowing the back of her hand and causing a glow to pulse from her palm. Portions of light twisted around her skin, and Loske could now feel the tree almost reciprocating the attraction in a near magnetic pull. “You’re the only one I’ve connected with.” The pilot reminded him, now turning to look at his unmasked visage “And it’s not a painful connection that makes me sick each time either.“ perhaps it was impatience that was pushing her to commit. Excitement and impatience. She’d been so out of touch with herself, her family and The Force for so long and then comes along [member="Cedric Grayson"] and she can speak to him across solar systems? She felt the need to latch on. Just because he’d made himself into a zealot didn’t mean she had to. Her mother had been described as a paragon of light, her father was moreso a man of duty that strayed from extremes. She felt she was more a daddy’s girl. Her hand plunged deeper, pressing against the smooth bark and the tree itself seemed to pulse against her skin. Her breath hitched for a moment and she stayed standing there, with an arm pushing into the light and the other hanging by her side. The tree breathed against her palm, and exited glowing spheres danced around her as a torrent of energy seemed to move about beneath the surface of the knowledge artefact.

As if pulling away a negative and positive charge, she curled her hand into a fist, and opened the palm again, dots of light excitedly tumbling out and around her face now and took a breathless step backward “That’s got to mean something. Maybe The Force wants you to teach me.”

 

[Placeholder 0128]

"Yes, you have to be exactly like me. Any deviance will not be tolerated," Cedric remarked with no small amount of sarcasm. His thoughts on the politics of things left him, replaced with a certainty that Loske would be his first padawan in five years.

He wore a pleased smile as she interacted with the Old Oak. The tree was nearly as old as the castle itself, and had served as a place of meditation for his family for generations. To have the daughter of one that had damned them here might have seemed blasphemous to some, but for Cedric it was the very embodiment of the Light. Above all else, a Jedi must know how to forgive, and in having Loske here it was if the empyrean itself was forgiving her family for its transgressions against Cedric's own.

Or perhaps it was simply his own forgiveness, and he was attributing it to divine providence. The source was irrelevant, for the effect was all the same.

Without a word, Cedric settled down onto the floor, his legs crossed over one another. He gestured for Loske to do the same. His eyes drew shut, and his mind opened to the Great Ocean. He envisioned the world around him like that of a perfectly calm sea. The waters glittered beneath the light of a warm, benevolent sun. The Jedi saw himself as sinking beneath its depths, drawn into a sense of warmth, comfort, and love that was unrivaled in its divinity.

"Empty your mind of every thought," he instructed. "The Force is an energy field, in its most base explanation. Each Jedi sees it differently - a personal heaven, one might say. Focus on that energy, imagine it flowing through your body, and let whatever comes to mind do so freely."

[member="Loske Matson"]

 

[Loske Treicolt]

A knavish simper was offered at his expense. They were already so different, no matter how many dogmas he offered she couldn’t see herself being as biopic as black and white. Nevertheless, she folded her long legs across from him and straightened her back. The dancing spots of light seemed to move as if they were alive, curiously circling her lithe frame.

Clearing her mind sounded like a funny task, but as she closed her eyes she found it incredibly difficult. Behind those violet curtains, bright kaleidoscopic patterns filled the shadows. She started to notice the smell of the room more, the permeating presence of [member="Cedric Grayson"] across from her. The nausea in the bottom of her belly starting to boil. She frowned and exhaled a short frustrated breath. In her mind’s eye, tall grasses tickled against her legs and the distant sound of a babbling brook was accompanied by questions about The Force. Words about flow walking, walls of light, arts of the small, etcetera - words that were foreign to her and didn’t belong in her memories. Her chest tightened and she attempted to imagine herself in her own head, bundling these words and pushing them away and out of sight. Stretching, glowing sinews replaces the blocks of words.

Maybe she was just expecting this ocean Cedric talked about to manifest as mighty waves and drag her down. Her father had suggested it was moreso a tool. She altered her thinking a bit, expecting to see what The Force wanted itself to be for her, with the parameters she existed in.

Deep down, beneath the knot in her stomach, the metaphysical warmed with excited potential.

“Do I have to talk out loud about what’s happening?” She asked, unsure if this task was normal or if Cedric could already see into her mind as he count when he penetrated to speak to her. She kept her eyes closed, still grateful that his overlooking the pathetic grasp she had on the force was such an endearing quality. Maybe he was just desperate for a student, or a friend. Either way - she was taking it!

 

[Placeholder 0128]

"If you want to. Sometimes it helps me, sometimes it doesn't. Just varies." Cedric answered. He'd come across more force users in his lifetime than most beings ever would. In that time he had come to observe that almost every single one was different. Some were similar to others with minuet changes in the way they approached the Force, others were far more more varied in their methods. the destruction of the orthodox orders after the rise of the Gulag Plague had led to such variety.

Cedric was of much the same thinking. He intended to allow Loske to flourish however she saw fit, so long as that did not include the Bogan.

"For me, it's an ocean of sorts. When I meditate, I'm immersed within its waters." He focused his attentions on Loske for a moment, examining her place in the empyrean. "You're normally an island with a hurricane over it. It's more like a light shower now."

[member="Loske Matson"]

 

[Loske Treicolt]

“Okay, let’s see how this goes again.”

She rocked her weight slightly and resettled down. What [member="Cedric Grayson"] saw was something vast and varied from planet to planet. For a string of moments, she lost her thoughts in wondering if each planet had ever truly explored the depths each ocean provided. Surely not. And if you aggregated all that, how much of the galaxy was unexplored? Loske faltered in her focus as she delved into this overwhelming consideration of the undiscovered.

The girl didn’t want to steal Cedric’s imagination, and therefore went back to her considering The Force as a necessity. Undefined until the wielder requested it. A protection when begged, a weapon when agitated. She saw it as something malleable. Within this world, she was without shape. Soft. Across from her, etched with stone like resolve was the boulder like intensity of her would-be teacher. His density in this ethereal presentation evidenced a weighty magnitude, but even that was overwhelmed by the elephantine heaviness of the twisted tree surrounding them. It was weighty and weightless. The tree itself breathed around their shapes, soft tendrils like spears surrounding them, buoyed until activated to a shape of action. What shape could she make with her thoughts?

Keeping a metaphysical eye on the hovering string around her, she focused on reaching out to Cedric. The inching forward of her shape was awkward at first, scraping at the nothingness between them and filling the space in strange stop gaps like liquid into a vessel. Finally, it straightened out and looped around the untethered shape around his silhouette.

Hi she tried.