Wait, who? Me?

[Kana Truden]

“Oh, I see.”

Kana took her seat as in instructed. It was a bit disappointing to hear that ‘precognition’ was something she might not even be able to learn, at least not this fast, but there was little point in dwelling on it for the time being.

Shaw’s grin as he mentioned the credit chip trick brought a smile to Kana’s lips. She could very well imagine the benefits of such a trick but she would not have expected such a comment from a Jedi of all people. They were after all the “protectors and guardians of the galaxy who brought justice upon those who sought to prey on the weak”.

The thought made her chuckle, it would seem like the stories might not have been somewhat completely accurate again.

“What do you mean?” Kana eventually asked Shaw as he finished explaining meditation. “Like a repetition of what I did before the credit chip trick? Just close my eyes and try to let go of everything?”

Kana crossed her legs and closed her eyes as she awaited [member="Shaw McKeller"]‘s answer.

 

[Shaw McKeller]

"Precisely," Shaw said with a nod. "Close your eyes and let go of everything. It helps if you get more comfortable, too. Some of the other Jedi like to sit cross legged, but I'm too stiff for that at my age. I just sit wherever. Go ahead and give it a try."

As much as he liked to claim he was stiff and slow, he really wasn't. At least, not to the extent he portrayed it as. Sure, he had old injuries and the like that kept him from being quite as flexible as he was when he was younger, but nothing that would slow him down to the pace of an old man. His beard and hair was gray and white, but he still felt somewhat younger than he was. The Force was a wonderful thing, he'd found. Those with Force sensitivity found longer life and fewer ailments as time went on. Granted, it didn't do much against injuries, but it helped all the same.

As far as sitting wherever went, Shaw still had to be careful. Admittedly, sitting cross legged did hurt the muscles on his hip, but not terribly so. He just liked being comfortable when he meditated, though he preferred to meditate in solitude and often in his room. He told others it was for the peace and quiet. Really, it was so no one would find him accidentally napping.

[member="Kana Truden"]

 

[Kana Truden]

“Okay.”

Just quietly sitting still in a place felt like a repetition of what Kana had done earlier in the park where they had met. Not quite, she didn’t do the whole ‘clear your mind’ thing but it had still been a couple of rather peaceful moments nonetheless.

She closed her eyes and tried to remember what she had done with the credit chit. For some reason it felt like ages ago since she had done it. What she had done was cleared her mind of thoughts and focused. That was pretty much all she had done so what was she expected to feel or accomplish from all this?

She spent a few moments thinking about how she had cleared her mind but there was a difference between thinking you had cleared your mind and actually having cleared your mind. Obviously it took her a while but eventually she managed to truly let go of it all. A strange feeling washed over her, it was almost like having a chill run down your spine except there were no Goosebumps.

Unsure what to make of the sensation she spoke up.

“Shaw?” The feeling disappeared as she opened her eye to look at her tutor. “Shaw.”

There was no answer.

“Shaw!” Kana shouted. “You awake? I swear I felt something.”

[member="Shaw McKeller"]

 

[Shaw McKeller]

Shaw had sat back to watch over Kana as she meditated. He could feel her uncertainty over understanding how to clear her mind and find her core, but he knew she'd find it soon. And he was right, and more.

Not only had she found her core, she'd moved to a different level of awareness. He could hear her shouting his name, looking for him, but her body hadn't moved. Not one muscle twitched, her face remained unchanging. The best way he could explain it was that she'd reached her center and then started meditating, only to move a level or two higher in meditation than she had intended.

'I'm here, lass,' he said, reaching into his own meditations and calling out to her. He wasn't at the same level, she wouldn't see him or sense him, but she could hear him in the Force. 'It looks like you went a wee bit too far into meditations, but that's alright. We can work on it here, but you need to keep calm. If you panic and get lost... well, I'm not sure what'll happen, but it won't be good. You're at a level most don't attempt until they've mastered meditation, and then some. Just keep focused and calm. Can you find your center? Can you feel the Force?"

[member="Kana Truden"]

 

[Kana Truden]

She had to admit, keeping calm and focused wasn’t the easiest thing to do but something about her current… Well, she had no word for it other than 'that strange sensation she felt before apparently being stuck in her own mind'. Something about it was oddly calming. Still, the idea of Kana being stuck in her own mind was frightening enough.

“What’s going on?” It had seemingly worked to call out for Shaw before. “I am keeping as calm as I can but it's getting really hard to not flip out at the moment.”

Wasn’t mediation supposed to be about being calm? Last Kana had heard it was certainly not about being lost inside yourself, unless in a cantina, then it was very much about getting lost inside of yourself or at the very least hung up about yourself but that wasn't the point.

“Still, I got this strange feeling, just like before.” Kana called out one last time with the hopes of an answer. “It’s like someone is watching me and I can’t do anything about it.”

Not that she wanted to. It felt safe, reassuring.

[member="Shaw McKeller"]

 

[Shaw McKeller]

'That's the Force, Kana,' came McKeller's voice. He couldn't see her, nor could he reach out and touch her, but he could still sense her and speak to her through the Force at the very least. 'It's in all things. The rocks, the trees, the animals, you, me, everything. It's how we perceive the things around us when we are without our senses and how we can find others strong in the Force. If the place you're in is the same as the one you left, just sit back in the chair. If it's not, take a seat on a rock or whatever is around you and breathe. If there's nowhere to sit, sit on the ground if you can. Just breathe, keep calm, and focus.'

Even for McKeller, this was odd. He'd only reached the level of meditation Kana had hit once, and that was on accident a long time ago. It was worrying to Shaw, but he knew if Kana kept calm and focused on herself she'd be okay. She wasn't the calmest and he'd pretty much dropped her into the middle of something she'd never experienced before, but he knew her presence in the Force was strong. She could handle it, he felt. Who knew? Maybe They would visit her as well, just like They had visited him, too.


[member="Kana Truden"]

 

[Kana Truden]

“If the place you're in is the same as the one you left, just sit back in the chair. If it's not, take a seat on a rock or whatever is around you and breathe. If there's nowhere to sit, sit on the ground if you can. Just breathe, keep calm, and focus.”

Except there was nothing around her at all, it was like standing in the void itself. There was no warm or cold. There were no life signs other than her own as the place seemed devoid of all else. The place simply just seemed to be.

In an effort to calm herself down she tried to sit down as Shaw had told her to. Her inner fear made her entire body shake, but she tried to block it out as Shaw had said she needed to do. She had to be calm, because Shaw had told her so.

Kana crossed her legs and began breathing deep, shaky breaths. She wasn’t sure what to expect anymore, this whole ordeal was proving itself nerve-wracking. Maybe this was just the first taste of what happened when the force went wrong. Maybe it was always this easy to just-…

Kana stopped her trail of thought as the realization kicked in; she was only ruining things for herself. She shook her head and tried to focus on the breathing. She was supposed to clear her mind yet there she had been rambling on about how screwed she was. It was time to stop, it was time to just be quiet and clear her mind. Not that it would be that easy, obviously.

It took a while but eventually she felt the force set over her. It helped her calm down, but not by much. Deep down she could still feel that festering fear that she’d be stuck here forever.

“Shaw.” She called out. “You know the way out, right? It's all going to be okay.”

[member="Shaw McKeller"]

 

[Shaw McKeller]

'I don't know the way out, only the way to get there. You're the only one who knows the way out of where you are,' Shaw's voice said as he spoke through the Force. 'It's less a question of where the exit is and more a question of applying the exit to where you are.'

It wasn't the greatest explanation he'd ever come up with, but it was the best he could do with the situation Kana was in. There wasn't any real way to get out of the meditation levels she was in, at least in the traditional sense. She'd reached another level of being, albeit completely on accident. Did this make her extremely powerful? No. At least, not inherently. This was no prophecy or legend told in the past only to come to reality now. No, this was simply a strange happenstance that was completely unexpected. Kana was no prophecy come to life nor was she the Force incarnate.

But it did speak of her power to come. Shaw knew she'd make an excellent Jedi one day. Or, failing that, an excellent warrior.

Funny how those two coincided at times.

[member="Kana Truden"]

 

[Kana Truden]

“What?”

The man wasn’t making sense but then again, nothing was anymore. With a slight sigh she returned to keeping calm. He said something about ‘applying the exit to where she was’. Did Jedi always talk this abstract and weird?

Maybe he meant that to escape she’d have to envision herself at the exit. It sounded really stupid, but what other choice did she have? If she had told herself earlier today that she would find herself stuck in some strange kind of dimension inside of her then she very much would have remained skeptical.

Letting go of her thoughts and emotions once more Kana tried to truly ‘meditate’ on what was going on. She needed an exit or a way out of her own mind; quite literally she needed to get something off her mind. In this case it was Kana herself.

She hadn’t realized it yet but the fear had settled. She was no longer afraid of the void; she was the void and maybe that the answer. Kana focused her energy on it. She wasn’t in a void, the void was within her. It was some part of her mind that until now had been left untouched. The harder she focused on it the clearer things seemed to get.

Before she knew it there was warmth again as the sound of engines filled her ear drums. She wanted to open her eyes but feared it to be another part of her mind playing tricks on her.

So there she remained quiet as she forced her unwilling eyes to remain closed.

“It’s a trick. I am not out yet.” Kana whispered to herself before she called out one more time to Shaw. “Shaw, I think something changed but I ain't opening my eyes yet, no way.”

[member="Shaw McKeller"]

 

[Shaw McKeller]

"You're right, it is a trick," Shaw's deadpan and serious voice came, almost as if he was nearby. "It's a complete trick, you're not back yet. You've still got a bit of meditation to do. You're not quite out of the woods yet, Kana."

She really was, he could tell she was back as she'd started moving slightly again. She was speaking with her voice, not her Force presence and mind, which meant she was back among the physical and away from the ethereal. That said, she still needed to learn how to meditate without drifting into that level of existence, and so she needed to keep it up a bit.

That, plus it was kind of funny to make Kana think she was still stuck on another plane of her consciousness when she really wasn't, but that was just a bonus. At least, that's what Shaw was telling himself.

[member="Kana Truden"]

 

[Kana Truden]

“Oh, okay…” Kana talked to herself as if nobody was around before speaking to herself once more. “My name is Shaw, I’m a jedi knight and I am going to trap you inside your own mind, Kana.”

Unaware that Shaw was in fact nearby the mocking tone of her voice would be the last thing he heard before the rest of her ramblings proceeded internally. Eventually she sighed as she tried to clear her mind once more and let the force flow through her.

A few moments came to pass before her focus was lost. Her mind just wouldn’t let go of the humming sound. Why was that noise there? At first the meditation had cancelled it out but not this time. What was wrong? Maybe she could take a quick peek, just a small one. No, Shaw had said no. To stay focused. Yet maybe…

Kana carefully opened her eye. There was a whole panel of buttons and switches like any real ship has. Kana closed her eye half-panicked. What if this was a strange form of test to keep her from losing focus? She contemplated it for a while before fully opening both her eyes.

As her eyes adapted to the light the blurry vision of someone in front of her cleared up. It looked like…

“Shaw?” Kana questioned what she was seeing. Then the realization kicked in. “Oh.”

Had he heard everything? But he said she was still stuck in herself. She awkwardly scratched the back of her head.

“Uh, oh, uhmm.. Yay, I’m free.”

[member="Shaw McKeller"]