Private Ghosts

[Judah Dashiell]

"I didn't exactly deliver the advice well. Something I do acknowledge. It doesn't help I told him 'when you know, you know' is an acceptable answer to such things."

It was fair that Makai couldn't give an entirely put together answer. He did have more than just 'when you know, you know' as a response it was just that portion that made him more than a little upset. It made it seem as if his son wasn't taking things seriously, yet deep down Judah knew it was quite serious in nature.

"Hmmm...I'm positive there will be several prenuptial agreements. Those have been in the work since the engagement. If there was a break-up, it would be fairly smooth on that front. I don't see a break up at all though. I think they will do just fine in the long-run. My concerns stem from the fact I think they should just take the time to work things out and be settled first. They've both got a lot going on, and on being newlyweds on top of that, you know?"

Azula Tindara

 

[Azula Tindara]

"I see. I mean I can see where you're coming from. I agree, for what it's worth. He's young and thinks this is the greatest thing that has or will ever happen to him."

She glanced at Judah and then turned her gaze back to the fire. She could imagine him making a meal of that conversation, but it still surprised her that he had spiralled afterwards.

"If it all went wrong - which I'm sure it won't - I know you'd be there for him though. He probably does too."

Azula frowned and took a quick swig. It burned at the back of her throat, but anything Judah owner had a fairly smooth after taste.

"Going big for the wedding?"

 

[Judah Dashiell]

"Of course. I'm there for both of them, doesn't mean I can't have reservations. However.... I'm just going to go with the flow. Try to get my reputation for that classic Dashiell calm back."

A lot of things just hit at once and unfortunately there was a great deal of fallout. Now? He felt fine. A bit awkward and unsure, but overall he felt like himself.

"As far as I know, very small. Which is surprising, I would have expected a blow out given this is Dangers daughter but...suppose that is what they wanted. Which is great, big weddings in these circles are so fake."

Judah had already downed half his refill.

"What are you doing after this? Off to find another innocent salvager to ensure?"

Azula Tindara

 

[Azula Tindara]

Classic calm, she mused silently. That had been deeply frustrating when she had been trying to pull one over him.

"After this? No immediate plan," she admitted. "I'm not having to look over my shoulder and I don't have anything pressing. Couple of contract requests to mull over."

"Maybe I'll go and find my own rock and build a fire. Seems peaceful."

It struck her that Judah didn't seem sure about his own son's wedding.

"When you reach out, I'm sure Makai would appreciate your interest in their plans for the day. And maybe if it's small the day won't be tedious," she added with a soft laugh.

 

[Judah Dashiell]

"Both sound peaceful. Mulling over the contracts, finding a quiet rock to hang out on, not looking over your shoulder. The last couple of weeks have made me rethink staying out on Celestia Station and living there. This has been nice to do nightly, something to mull over in my free time I suppose. I don't think it's wise to go back to Celestia, a lot has changed...fresh start...all that..."

A small nod at her advice.

"I'll do that...ask about the day. I mean, I'm walking Myra down the aisle, I'm fairly certain I'll have to be briefed at one point."

Rehearsal? Did such a thing happen for such a small wedding? He didn't have a traditional wedding so in all fairness he simply did not now. He and his ex-wife got married on the beach with just her parents in attendance. Simple, easy. Not that they had the credits for something fancy.

"Maybe uh....maybe after this wedding we could grab dinner? Not a date...I mean....not opposed to that either but...uh...just....I'm just trying to rebuild the relationships I ruined."

Smooth Judah. He had been more than a little nervous to ask, admitting he messed up was difficult. Owning up to it was one thing, trying to make amends was another.

Azula Tindara

 

[Azula Tindara]

Azula had been thinking about veering the topic towards any wedding speeches that might be required. Then she felt the mood start to shift.

It might have been the Force, it might have just been her ability to read people and how well she had come to know Judah.

When he finished stumbling through the question she smiled. For a moment she had feared a more drastic question and how she might have reacted and the mistakes that could have been compounded on this lonely planet. A little whisky went a long way.

"I was going to say... I shouldn't just swap messages with your secretary every now and again. It would be nice to stay in touch. We can do dinner but let's... Yes let's just see how things go," she replied.

It wasn't a door slammed shut. It wasn't thrown open.

She took a breath and chose a little more honesty. It could still be difficult.

"I'd like that, I made a connection for the first time in years. A real one. I don't want it left behind."

 

[Judah Dashiell]

"Oh, you should contacting my secretary. Apparently Makai fired her, she was doing all sorts of underhanded things. I have two new assistants...uh...Hugo and some guy who goes by Finn...Haven't met them, obviously. I can give you their information if you're so inclined, just in case. You should still have mine, nothing has changed on that front."

A pause as he finished his whisky, debating if he wanted more. Empty glass swirled for a moment, gently tapping against the arm of the chair he was currently sitting on. Figuring he was no timetable, Judah poured himself another two fingers of the alcohol, swirling the liquid once more as he thought. Not how expected to spend his night, yet it wasn't completely horrible.

"Yeah, I don't want to lose touch either. We have a plan then, after the wedding we will go out for dinner. Er...somewhere preferably without war, although thats been tricky as of late. I figure you could tell me what,where, and when."

Judah was purposely leaving the ball in her court. He didn't want to push meeting up if she was just being nice and agreeing now, but perhaps rethought the situation later. Most likely best for both of them.

Azula Tindara

 

[Azula Tindara]

"What where and when. Are you being polite in case I don't want to or expecting me to pull something remarkable out of the bag?"

The look on her face made it clear that it was a rhetorical question.

"The wars... They're going to get worse again. Easy for me. I can be mobile. Not so easy for a business to avoid a government looking to fund its war or take territory."

Azula thought of the old military base she had found with Makai. There would be more barriers to all aspects of his business, even before spy satellites and outposts got in the way.

She took a sip of whisky. She sighed.

"I spent a lot of time running. I stopped for you. Well, I stopped for me, but because of you. It would feel wrong to just put that behind me like I've done everything else that came before."

 

[Judah Dashiell]

"I am being polite."

He didn't want her to feel obligated to take him up on his offer. If she changed her mind, she changed her mind. Judah just wanted to put the offer out there.

"Hm, yes, I foresee a great deal of problems ahead. Avoiding conflict will be tricky in some cases. Easy for my salvage side, not so easy for the mining side. We will make due."

He predicted a lot of sleepless nights ahead. They were going to have to work quickly and stay on top of troop movements in war torn areas in order to stay out of the conflict.

"Yeah, don't lose any backwards progress, you know. Keep living on your terms. The real Azula isn't worth hiding."

A small pause.

"If you need anything with this war breaking out, just let me know."

Azula Tindara

 

[Azula Tindara]

"If you need anything with this war breaking out, just let me know."

"I was... I was going to say the same thing," Azula replied quietly.

War had dangers for any business, especially one that traded between the territories of warring factions. It also had opportunity.

"You know I can work anywhere and..."

Azula paused for a moment. She actually felt a moment of embarrassment. The compliment had sunk through her skin. This was what it was to live outside of the mask. No hiding and no barriers between her and her feelings. She just had to sort between those that deserved to be in the moment and those that were memories.

"...well I hope you can still trust me."

 

[Judah Dashiell]

Judah chuckled quietly that they were thinking the same thing. The unaffiliated? It was nice not to beholden to any group or government. At the same time, one could realize there was safety in numbers. This is why it was important for folks like them to be watching each others back. Not the only reason ; they did have a relationship and just because it ended didn't mean Judah wanted to just shut her completely out of his life.

If she needed him, he would be there.

"I trust you completely."

Beyond a few underhanded things, Azula Tindara was trustworthy for the most part. No worse than anyone else in the 'verse in his opinion. Judah had come to realize it was more of a ploy to hide herself than actually cause any real harm to himself. Whisky was drained and he decided not to refill his glass, feeling a little buzzed. Didn't need a massive headache in the morning.

"As for me, don't worry about me. That goes for everything on all fronts...business, personal."

 

[Azula Tindara]

"Thank you," Azula said.

"I need you to know that I mean that. That what you said meant a lot to me. Because I'm also going to say: don't be silly."

She turned to smile at him. Without the mask and with more than a few sips of whisky down she felt what he had to say. There was no shielding herself from it.

To be seen was one thing. To be seen and to be fully trusted by someone else after all the hiding she had done was quite another.

"I'm not...worried worried. But I flew out to this rock already. Let's just say I'm allowed to still care?"

 

[Judah Dashiell]

"Of course you can care and be worried. I'm just saying....I'm going to be okay. I don't spend much time in the Core to begin with. Whatever happens, happens, you know?" A small pause. "Follow your own advice on that one, you're the one out there on your own."

He wasn't young and foolish, there would be no running off into a warzone. He had given that up ages ago once he left the military. Age had tempered trying to save the world. Now he was just busy trying to save his family and those he cared about. That kept him more than busy enough these days. There always seemed to be something cropping up he had to worry about, despite Makai being grown.

Judah turned his head and smiled back. Being with Azula Tindara was a little easier ; he could be himself without judgement. Or if she was judging him, the Torgruta would merely come out and say it, there was no beating around the bush. He could lay down a few darker thoughts and she would take them in stride, adding her own perspective.

After all, she wasn't the only one who had to wear a mask from time to time.

"You should stay....spend the night." Should he make a bold claim? What would it hurt? Bridges were already burned elsewhere. "I've missed your perspective....more importantly I've missed you in my bed"

 

[Azula Tindara]

"Follow your own advice on that one, you're the one out there on your own."

She sighed. She supposed in a way she deserved a little poke back in the friendly verbal sparring. It was a strange time and situation for her to reach back out to him. That stubborn streak of her own wanted to prove she could make her way.

How would that have felt? She thought to herself. To break up, walk away and then immediately ask for help?

They were where they were.

"You should stay....spend the night." Should he make a bold claim? What would it hurt? Bridges were already burned elsewhere. "I've missed your perspective....more importantly I've missed you in my bed"

Azula thought she did well to remain seated calmly, looking into the fire. It was dark now, the light dancing across the silhouette of her profile.

"Judah..."

She said it quietly, instinct to put a brake on his expectations. There was an internal battle to deal with.

"It's been good to just talk..."

A pause and a deep breath.

"...I will be staying the night, but I need you to understand it doesn't change anything. I've been drinking - which was silly - and have to sleep it off," she explained, turning towards him.